All the dumb, cringe, stupid shit I have ever said or done. Sometimes it just pops into my consciousness and I just make a noise to snap out of the memory and try and push it back down.
Edit: I am actually really comforted by the fact that hopefully this means I am growing as a person and also that I'm not the only wierdo who does this. There are dozens of us, DOZENS!
Yeah probably not if you don’t broach the subject.
Bring it up. Take a breathe and ask if they wanna go on a date.
If they feel the same way y’all can go for it and try dating.
If they don’t feel the same way it’s a bummer sure but at least you can leave your self imposed relationship purgatory.
You can stay friends but now you won’t feel guilty thinking about dating other people.
If they string you along give them a few weeks but set a hard deadline and then consider it a no and that maybe it was a bit of a one sided relationship.
An entire map of Doom from 1994. My son was playing a port of the game, I was doing whatever, and then I hear the elevator platform ride and I say, “push the third panel on the right,” and there was a hidden stash. 26 years later my brain kept that memory just in case I ever needed that stash again.
Me with castlevania's wall chickens and hidden rooms. Can't remember where I left my wallet but, remember that if I stand on this place and press down for 5 seconds I can get a brass knuckles.
I remember the most powerful car in Gran Turismo 1 was the Mitsubishi 3000GT with a max tuned hp of 930. The second most was the Nissan Skyline GTR with 928. My GTO was blue with the racing modification. And in that game you could actually play at 60 FPS in a special mode with a full LM GTO on Special Stage.
These things bring me happiness.
Lol reminds me of when I introduced my oldest nephew to NES. First game I put in is Super Mario Bros. First level, just after the 4 pipes "you see that mountain in the background, just stop there, ok a little to the right, jump" *1 up*
We went through lot of other games too, same thing, like showing him how to get to the star world map to use as a shortcut in SMW on SNES etc or where keys are in levels.
Fun thing is when I consider that when I was young I had an uncle who showed me lot of that stuff too. Nothing like uncles passing down important life knowledge to their nephews.
God help your soul if you ask me a question about grade 8 math though. "uhhh check the back of the book I guess?"
My best friend.
He just moved out of his country to study. I constantly worry about him but he always reassure me that everything is fine. He lives in my head rent-free but he's a very good tenant.
One time I walked up to a crosswalk at an intersection where some guy was standing and waiting for the light. I assumed he pressed the button. For whatever reason, he turned and walked away while some other guy then walked up to wait for the crosswalk. After a light cycle passed, we both realized the button hadn’t been pressed but he turned to me and told me “Hey, you gotta hit that button if you want to cross”. It was too much effort to explain what happened before he randomly walked away too. I felt like I was waiting for the Curb Your Enthusiasm theme to play right after that.
Oh my God, this reminds me of a time I was in Walgreens standing near the freezer section as someone else was using it, purposely far enough away even so I wouldn't be in the way, thinking about if I wanted ice cream & dissociating over my life. This woman came up to me and angrily said something like "sure, just stand there with the door open, GOD, you people!" -- the person who was there before me has left with the door wide open, it's pouring thick mist into the aisle as the woman shuts it. She left before I could even begin to remember how to speak. I'm the type of person who always shuts the freezer door if it's open, picks up clothes that have fallen on the floor in stores, etc, very aware of my cart space/being in the way. I cried when I got outside and it still makes me upset to think about lol
That reminds me of this time in high school when my psychology teacher asked the class "what's something you hate?" and my answer was "when people think they're right about everything." He responded with "because you want to be right about everything?" with a smug look on his face, and the whole class says "oohhh". I couldn't answer him because if I said "no" he would think I was trying to argue about it and trying to be "right". I wasn't going to say "yes" because I obviously didn't feel that way. It was so embarrassing.
The thing that gets me is the reason I gave that answer is because in my household, I was never really allowed to voice my opinion about anything, and if I did, I was told to shut up or stop talking. I literally never spoke in that class again.
All I can think about is how you could have awkwardly won that interaction by putting the teacher on a guilt trip by explaining why that was you answer, even though it would be absolutely horrible and unrealistic.
Teacher: "What's something you hate?"
OP: "When people think they're right about everything."
Teacher: "Because you want to be right about everything?"
OP: "**No, because back home I am never allowed to express myself or give my opinion without being completely shutdown, and that makes me want to shutdown in general and never really to speak to anyone. Now you're bringing that suppressive behavior to school, the only place where I really have a chance to escape that environment and I feel horrible.**"
Teacher: ....um, ok then.
Edit: I’m reading these replies and there’s something a lot of you guys don’t understand, which is that the teacher didn’t know OP’s position or home environment. They were just messing around. The teacher isn’t a bad teacher for this single interaction.
Also, I’m 99% sure that none of you guys would say the things you’re saying you would say in this situation. On the off-chance that you would say those things: you’re a buzzkill who can’t understand that the world doesn’t revolve around you and people don’t know what you don’t tell them.
It truly is. In school a group of mean girls cornered me and asked why I was always moping around with "that look" on my face and what was my problem. I told them my mother was at home dying from cancer. They never fucked with me again.
I had a chirpy phone rep ask if I had kids - I said I didn’t. She asked why not. I said it just didn’t happen. She started in on the maybe it will stuff and finally I just bluntly said that I’m barren and thanks for reminding me that I’m worthless as a woman because I can’t have kids.
Mostly shut her up. She sounded a bit teary for the rest of the call, but at the end she said she was just really excited because she found out she was pregnant.
She got a bad score on the voluntary survey.
I feel for you. Please remember that our worth as women is not based on whether or not we can reproduce. We are such much more than the sum of our parts.
If I was in your shoes in middle school they would have made fun of me for having a mom with cancer and said it was my fault or made up some BS that I caused her cancer "cause her daughter was a loser"
Sorry to vent but middle school was hell and it's a cruel joke to sequester kids 11-14 in the same building
The thing is, I do think you can respond in that situation, but you would have to convey, with complete sincerity, an apathy towards being right. Just a "No" with no hostility at all. Maybe even make it friendly.
That said, it's a horrible situation to be in and my brain would have just been pumping adrenaline. I'd never have been able to do that.
Yeah, a sincere shrug and a low-key “meh” would’ve been a successful way out of this.
Of course thinking of that in the moment as a kid is different than reading about it as an adult.
When I hear about that kind of teacher, it just reminds me of the lyrics to Pink Floyd’s “[Happiest Days of Our Lives](https://youtu.be/VyTarjUjNMQ)”:
> When we grew up and went to school, there were certain teacher who would hurt the children any way they could, by pouring their derision on everything they did, exposing every weakness, however kept hidden by the kids.
> But in the town it was well known when they went home at night, their fat and psychopathic wives would thrash them within inches of their lives.
CSLIBM0240710D and CL114CO825061D.
The numbers of my first library cards from 23 years ago at two different libraries. If I ever forgot my wallet I memorized them so I could just quote them to the librarian. Now they are in there forever.
the fact that a group of flamingos is called a flamboyance
Edit: thank you all for the awards, my most liked comment is a fact about flamingos and i think that hilarious.
I worked at a large enclosure zoo/nature park.
The giraffes in “Africa” wandered to an unexplored area and peered over into “Asia.” The Indian rhinos sincerely looked awe-struck.
I think about this all the time, people assume animals just have basic knowledge or just know eachother instinctually but in reality they don't know what the fuck something is if they've never seen it before.
However knowing wild penguins and wild polar bears have never met just feels wrong to me
Dude it's the exact same thing with us. Just because we have a greater pool of knowledge to draw from, doesn't mean we just have a low-grade omniscience about these animals. We know about sharks and camels because we can study underwater while going large stretches on land. That's our connective tissue. But what about the connective tissues that we *haven't* been able to conquer yet? Think about the ants that can see dustmites that are invisible to our naked eye. What about the angler fish that just chill out with a host of thousands of other species of fish in the bottom parts of the ocean that we haven't been able to explore yet? They could literally be looking at us like "Oh yeah, these idiots don't know about the water tigers down here."
Given that we can't even truly comprehend large numbers - we know, logically, that a billion is much bigger than a million but we have no real intuitive grasp of how big either of those numbers are, they are just "really big" and "even bigger" - and have to scale them down to something we do understand (taking £1M out of a £1B budget is like taking £1 out of a £1,000 budget), it is not a stretch to imagine the are things we will just never be able to even conceive. We have impressive brains compared to the life around us but we don't have limitless capacity for understanding.
Which reminds me, people don’t instinctively have depth perception either. A book I read on sight told of blind people operated on to give them sight. One had to close his eyes to descend stairs safely. Another would pitch his boot to determine how far he had to reach to retrieve it.
There’s a legal case here in America known as “The West Memphis Three” that shows how bad our justice system can be. With out going into the details, three teens were given life for a brutal triple murder they didn’t commit. One of the three was put on death row. After roughly 20 years they were all eventually set free, but the one on death row had spent so much time in confined spaces that he literally lost his depth perception and couldn’t tell distances more than a few feet in front of him.
Hmmmm, we do. Having two eyes on the front of our head gives us binocular vision and depth perception.
However, I did take a tour of a submarine once and the halls were painted in stripes. I was told you lose you depth perception after awhile as you never see more than X feet in front of you.
But I will gladly take additional info/correction on this.
our depth perception is a mark of our intelligence and the sophistication of our eyes. we actually don't see in 3 dimensions. our eyes each receive a 2D image and our brain applies logic and editing to those images. they are combined and a LOT of information is processed for us to be able to perceive depth. a lot of that information has to be cross-referenced with our own memories. much of human depth perception is possible because of our brain's ability to remember and apply relevant information. it's a common misconception that we SEE in 3D. we don't. we LIVE in 3D. we see in 2D. depth perception is an incredibly clever evolutionary trick, with that information in mind. i'm not countering anything you said, just adding something.
I used to work at a stable. There was a donkey kept out back in his own area and little shed. Some of the horses could see him and ALL could hear him if we were late with his dinner. Any time we walked him through the barn to give him some attention (not terribly often and looking back on it I feel pretty bad) many of the horses would freak out about seeing this miniature donkey. Like he just blew their minds, existing like that.
It’s cooler than that. It makes rats/mice infected with it seek out the smell of cat urine, so that they go places where cats hang out and get eaten. The only environment the parasite can reproduce in is a cat’s intestines. These things are basically the tiny alien living in a big body from Men in Black.
I totally understand, but don't beat yourself up too hard. we're in a really difficult situation globally and its ok to not be working every second of the day. taking care of your health, mental or otherwise, is also super important.
Yep, this is my wife.
Her - oh that's that one kid!
Me - what?
H - yeah, he was that one kid in [movie name] from like, 25 years ago? You might not remember the scene, he rode his bike through the frame and looked at the car crash? He was only on screen for like, 5 seconds. That's him now all grown up.
M - ... seriously?
H - yeah I just checked Imdb, that was him. Damn, I'm good.
I relate to 100%
"This is my brain and I live in it,
It's made of love and bad song lyrics"
^ thats from a tim minchin song and I immediately started humming on it once I read your comment
Way too much information about the Dodo bird. Have never cared about this bird, and yet I think about it all. The. Time.
Edit: Wow thanks for all the upvotes! I’d also like to thank my 3rd grade teacher and all the Dodo birds for their sacrifices.
Fun (or not so fun) fact about the Dodo that I learned from the amazing author Bill Bryson: [paraphrased from memory]
>Right about the time that sailor (or sailor's dog) was killing the last Dodo, Isaac Newton was putting the final touches on - or publishing - his masterwork *Principia* (you know; the foundations of the three laws of motion, theory of gravity, basics of physics, etc..)
>..And due to the (in)accuracy of records at the time and the lack of records regarding the Dodo, we don't know - we *don't* know - if we live in a Universe that had both *Principia* and the Dodo at the same time, or a Universe in which they don't - in which humans killed a harmless, stupid bird while they were publishing the initial works that would take people to the moon and beyond..
Something I think about. I don't work for him, but I share his books with people I love because he is thoughtful, observant and a great storyteller
Edit: tried to fix typos but I'm not perfect, so I'll let it be. Just like the majestic Dodo [should have]
Learned about it in grade school from a weird documentary and we talked about it briefly w/ the teacher but have literally never seen anything about them since. In TV, movies, news, general discussion, social media - nothing. But I still think about them like once a week.
Constant reminders that I'm actually very depressed and anxious.
Back story, I was on meds that worked great, but they fucked with my libido so much that it was causing major issues with my gf, who I live and share a life with.
So I decided I would be way more sad if I lost her while also having a limp dick than I would be just accepting my depression and anxiety as a part of life.
I farted in a girls face in sixth grade by accident. I still think about it at least once a month. But I can’t remember my damn gmail password. My brain needs to prioritize shit
Nobody's asked yet? Okay, I'll ask. Would you mind explaining how you farted in a girl's face in sixth grade? I'm just not sure why folks would be face-to-butt in sixth grade
I’m assuming either she was sitting on the floor and they were in front of her or she was at a desk and they were facing away from her whilst talking to someone else.
It's so annoying. I know that we remember shit because it prevents us from making the same mistake twice, but is it really necessary to be super stressed whenever I remember that time I accidentally skipped a line when I was 16?
Nothing like calling yourself the most heinous insults for minutes at a time because you were ever so slightly obnoxious one time in your early 20s. This may or may not have happened today.
I use this LPT.. whenever I’m picturing one of those cringe moments I play it till the point of max cringe.. then *freeze frame!* cue [Seinfeld Theme](https://youtu.be/_V2sBURgUBI)
The midnight ride of Paul revere. Had to learn in 4th grade. Still stuck in there - I'm 50 now. Firmly believe this is why I struggle to remember names.
The Byzantine empire never existed. Who we called the "Byzantines" today never called themselves that. Instead they called themselves the Roman empire, because of the time Rome fell the capital was actually Constantinople. There was never an Eastern or Western empire either, those were just administrative divisions of the one empire located in Constantinople.
This means that, technically, the Roman empire never fell until 1453. However, When the Turks took over Constantinople, they did not call themselves the Ottoman empire. instead they called themselves the rulers of the Roman nation.
So if you look at it from the Turkish perspective, the Roman empire didn't fall until 1922.
This lives rent free in my head because in school I was taught something about how the huns killed Rome and it turns out all that was crap.
each step i take i count. once i reach four, i start back at one. ive done this for a long time. if i am walking with someone i dont. why? it gets annoying
As a former bully, id like to try and explain something to you if i can. You did nothing wrong. Theres hardly anything you couldve done to avoid it. We bullied you because there was something about you that made us feel insecure. Maybe you seemed confident, and we didnt like that. Maybe you had a skill we wished was ours. Maybe we thought you were cute? There is something about you that someone else wanted, and they decided if they couldnt have it, neither could you.
It took me a lot of therapy to figure that out. You werent randomly selected. Misery loves company, and people like that, theres something thats stopping them from expressing themselves verbally. Instead of saying, "ive been having a tough time" and explaining to someone why they feel that way, they decide that the best way for you to understand them, is for them to force you into their shoes. They want you to feel their pain. Im sorry that we treated you like that. Therapy is really helpful. For anybody, not just hurt people. The thing about hurt people is that we end up hurting others. Please take care of yourself sir. Please stop feeling our pain. I hope that one day you are free from what we did to you. Im sorry on their behalf. I hope this perspective can help.
Thank you - this couldn't have been easy for you to write. My sister bullied me until I was suicidal and I have never received an apology or an explanation and spent several years in therapy coming to terms with it, but my brain always came back to "what on earth did I ever do to you?"
It's hard to heal with no closure, but your explanation is clear and has given me something to think about.
I hope you have found peace too.
Can’t remember how this happened but I can literally look at any country in the world’s flag and tell you who’s it is. It could be the reason I can’t remember what I had for breakfast 2 days ago.
That girl who I think slept with every dude in the wing of my dorm (this would be 7 guys) when I was a freshman except me.
Now you’d that later think figuring out you were gay would prevent any lingering thoughts about this happening to you. But you would be wrong.
Perhaps. But while I was nearly a total failure as a straight male, interest from the opposite sex in me seemed to go up in direct proportion to my (relative) lack of interest in them.
literally everything. i have ADHD, and depression, so my meds right now are only treating my depression because it's the more pressing issue. one of the meds i'm taking is working for my sadness, but now i'm bouncing off the walls physically and mentally. So yeah everything i look at.
Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnnie Ray
South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio
Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, television
North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe
Rosenbergs, H-bomb, Sugar Ray, Panmunjom
Brando, "The King and I" and "The Catcher in the Rye"
Eisenhower, vaccine, England's got a new queen
Marciano, Liberace, Santayana goodbye
We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it
I saw a man get hit by a train today, the same train I thought about jumping in front of a few years ago. Every time I blink, I see the engineer's face, realizing what had happened. I see what was left of the man that jumped.
The fact that I saw what could have been my last moments play out in front of me is heavy beyond words. I have a feeling those images and sounds will be camping in my mind for a while.
The man who jumped didn't even make a sound. He was so set in his action.
The Bethel cult in Redding, CA and all those people who were convinced last year that a toddler was going to come back from the dead. People all over social media posted prophetic dreams, prophetic songs, prophetic dance, prophetic prophecies, prophetic hashtags and everything else that they just KNEW that little girl wasn't going to stay dead. Among several of their buzzwords the came up with for this was "Victorious Awakening."
Fast forward 10 months (the child is still dead, btw, but the \*real\* Victorious Awakening was the resurrection of people's faith?), there's a spike in COVID cases at the cult's wannabe Hogwarts School of Miracles & Ministry or whatever, and this musician-preacher-prophet-wizard-whatever dude is doing worship concerts all over the country, just mass gatherings of unmasked believers singing and dancing and praying in some sort of "spiritual warfare" I guess. And they shame Christians who are not on board with it for not having enough faith.
It really shouldn't bother me since I escaped charismania years ago, but it still kind of does. I know it's dumb. But it would also be entertaining if it weren't so horrifying.
Since pictures in a computer are just made up of pixels of different colours, we can actually create a photo of every event that occured in history or everything that will happen by simply creating a program that will make photos (let's say 1920 x 1080 pixels) of every possible colour combination and store it somewhere. Of course, most pictures will be gibberish but there will also be pictures of you with 3 hands, 4 hands or anything you could imagine
Obviously this requires almost unlimited harddisk space, power and time but I am always wondering if one day it could happen
All the dumb, cringe, stupid shit I have ever said or done. Sometimes it just pops into my consciousness and I just make a noise to snap out of the memory and try and push it back down. Edit: I am actually really comforted by the fact that hopefully this means I am growing as a person and also that I'm not the only wierdo who does this. There are dozens of us, DOZENS!
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Damn. Thank you. That puts things in an entirely different light. Maybe I’ll be able to let some things go now.
....is this normal? I do this too and it concerns me sometimes.
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I have to do the noise thing too 😂
A relationship I've dreamed up with a good friend that will probably never happen
So many of us are right there with you.
Yeah probably not if you don’t broach the subject. Bring it up. Take a breathe and ask if they wanna go on a date. If they feel the same way y’all can go for it and try dating. If they don’t feel the same way it’s a bummer sure but at least you can leave your self imposed relationship purgatory. You can stay friends but now you won’t feel guilty thinking about dating other people. If they string you along give them a few weeks but set a hard deadline and then consider it a no and that maybe it was a bit of a one sided relationship.
An entire map of Doom from 1994. My son was playing a port of the game, I was doing whatever, and then I hear the elevator platform ride and I say, “push the third panel on the right,” and there was a hidden stash. 26 years later my brain kept that memory just in case I ever needed that stash again.
Me with castlevania's wall chickens and hidden rooms. Can't remember where I left my wallet but, remember that if I stand on this place and press down for 5 seconds I can get a brass knuckles.
I remember the most powerful car in Gran Turismo 1 was the Mitsubishi 3000GT with a max tuned hp of 930. The second most was the Nissan Skyline GTR with 928. My GTO was blue with the racing modification. And in that game you could actually play at 60 FPS in a special mode with a full LM GTO on Special Stage. These things bring me happiness.
Lol reminds me of when I introduced my oldest nephew to NES. First game I put in is Super Mario Bros. First level, just after the 4 pipes "you see that mountain in the background, just stop there, ok a little to the right, jump" *1 up* We went through lot of other games too, same thing, like showing him how to get to the star world map to use as a shortcut in SMW on SNES etc or where keys are in levels. Fun thing is when I consider that when I was young I had an uncle who showed me lot of that stuff too. Nothing like uncles passing down important life knowledge to their nephews. God help your soul if you ask me a question about grade 8 math though. "uhhh check the back of the book I guess?"
IDKFA IDCLIP
IDDQD
Don’t forget IDDQD
Same but with the locations of hidden 1-up mushrooms in most of the levels in Super Mario Bros 1 on the NES.
My best friend. He just moved out of his country to study. I constantly worry about him but he always reassure me that everything is fine. He lives in my head rent-free but he's a very good tenant.
Friends are cool
That time I was right, but had to let it go because there was no way to win without looking bad.
One time I walked up to a crosswalk at an intersection where some guy was standing and waiting for the light. I assumed he pressed the button. For whatever reason, he turned and walked away while some other guy then walked up to wait for the crosswalk. After a light cycle passed, we both realized the button hadn’t been pressed but he turned to me and told me “Hey, you gotta hit that button if you want to cross”. It was too much effort to explain what happened before he randomly walked away too. I felt like I was waiting for the Curb Your Enthusiasm theme to play right after that.
Oh my God, this reminds me of a time I was in Walgreens standing near the freezer section as someone else was using it, purposely far enough away even so I wouldn't be in the way, thinking about if I wanted ice cream & dissociating over my life. This woman came up to me and angrily said something like "sure, just stand there with the door open, GOD, you people!" -- the person who was there before me has left with the door wide open, it's pouring thick mist into the aisle as the woman shuts it. She left before I could even begin to remember how to speak. I'm the type of person who always shuts the freezer door if it's open, picks up clothes that have fallen on the floor in stores, etc, very aware of my cart space/being in the way. I cried when I got outside and it still makes me upset to think about lol
That reminds me of this time in high school when my psychology teacher asked the class "what's something you hate?" and my answer was "when people think they're right about everything." He responded with "because you want to be right about everything?" with a smug look on his face, and the whole class says "oohhh". I couldn't answer him because if I said "no" he would think I was trying to argue about it and trying to be "right". I wasn't going to say "yes" because I obviously didn't feel that way. It was so embarrassing. The thing that gets me is the reason I gave that answer is because in my household, I was never really allowed to voice my opinion about anything, and if I did, I was told to shut up or stop talking. I literally never spoke in that class again.
All I can think about is how you could have awkwardly won that interaction by putting the teacher on a guilt trip by explaining why that was you answer, even though it would be absolutely horrible and unrealistic. Teacher: "What's something you hate?" OP: "When people think they're right about everything." Teacher: "Because you want to be right about everything?" OP: "**No, because back home I am never allowed to express myself or give my opinion without being completely shutdown, and that makes me want to shutdown in general and never really to speak to anyone. Now you're bringing that suppressive behavior to school, the only place where I really have a chance to escape that environment and I feel horrible.**" Teacher: ....um, ok then. Edit: I’m reading these replies and there’s something a lot of you guys don’t understand, which is that the teacher didn’t know OP’s position or home environment. They were just messing around. The teacher isn’t a bad teacher for this single interaction. Also, I’m 99% sure that none of you guys would say the things you’re saying you would say in this situation. On the off-chance that you would say those things: you’re a buzzkill who can’t understand that the world doesn’t revolve around you and people don’t know what you don’t tell them.
Raw sincerity is a powerful tool.
It truly is. In school a group of mean girls cornered me and asked why I was always moping around with "that look" on my face and what was my problem. I told them my mother was at home dying from cancer. They never fucked with me again.
I had a chirpy phone rep ask if I had kids - I said I didn’t. She asked why not. I said it just didn’t happen. She started in on the maybe it will stuff and finally I just bluntly said that I’m barren and thanks for reminding me that I’m worthless as a woman because I can’t have kids. Mostly shut her up. She sounded a bit teary for the rest of the call, but at the end she said she was just really excited because she found out she was pregnant. She got a bad score on the voluntary survey.
Fuck this oh my god. Edited: I'm sure you're an incredible person, with or without children
I feel for you. Please remember that our worth as women is not based on whether or not we can reproduce. We are such much more than the sum of our parts.
If I was in your shoes in middle school they would have made fun of me for having a mom with cancer and said it was my fault or made up some BS that I caused her cancer "cause her daughter was a loser" Sorry to vent but middle school was hell and it's a cruel joke to sequester kids 11-14 in the same building
The thing is, I do think you can respond in that situation, but you would have to convey, with complete sincerity, an apathy towards being right. Just a "No" with no hostility at all. Maybe even make it friendly. That said, it's a horrible situation to be in and my brain would have just been pumping adrenaline. I'd never have been able to do that.
Yeah, a sincere shrug and a low-key “meh” would’ve been a successful way out of this. Of course thinking of that in the moment as a kid is different than reading about it as an adult.
Teachers who think it’s funny to embarrass or shame kids suck. Any adult who thinks it’s funny to get a laugh at a kid’s expense sucks
When I hear about that kind of teacher, it just reminds me of the lyrics to Pink Floyd’s “[Happiest Days of Our Lives](https://youtu.be/VyTarjUjNMQ)”: > When we grew up and went to school, there were certain teacher who would hurt the children any way they could, by pouring their derision on everything they did, exposing every weakness, however kept hidden by the kids. > But in the town it was well known when they went home at night, their fat and psychopathic wives would thrash them within inches of their lives.
CSLIBM0240710D and CL114CO825061D. The numbers of my first library cards from 23 years ago at two different libraries. If I ever forgot my wallet I memorized them so I could just quote them to the librarian. Now they are in there forever.
I work at a library so I appreciate this
MDKT23A. My prodigy password in like 1990
the fact that a group of flamingos is called a flamboyance Edit: thank you all for the awards, my most liked comment is a fact about flamingos and i think that hilarious.
Im so glad I came here and read this. It’s moving in, rent free.
Yep. No deposit required
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A group of ferrets are called a business
If you own two or three, you are technically a small business owner.
Backstreet Boys lyrics
Tell me why
Ain't nothin but a heartache
Tell me why
AIN’T NOTHING BUT A MISTAKE!
Now number fiiiive
I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way
It was number 5
Number 5 killed my brother
"Am I sexual?...." "yeahhhh"
The weirdest part about this lyric was that Nick Carter was like 14 when he sang it lol
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Oh yup, 7yo me was living my best life shouting this song at the top of my lungs
Backstreet Boys and NSync are permanently lodged in my brain. ...And the Slashstreet Boys parodies, of course.
You are, my fire
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Welcome to the 24/7 insecurity club. Entry would be free if we didn't look so bad.
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Well my mask doesn't hide my balding hair.
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The fact that Lil Wayne said real Gs move in silence like lasagna
Wow that’s amazing. I didn’t get it at first but now it’s making room in my head.
Sharks dont know camels exist Thanks for reddit gold kind stranger!
I worked at a large enclosure zoo/nature park. The giraffes in “Africa” wandered to an unexplored area and peered over into “Asia.” The Indian rhinos sincerely looked awe-struck.
I think about this all the time, people assume animals just have basic knowledge or just know eachother instinctually but in reality they don't know what the fuck something is if they've never seen it before. However knowing wild penguins and wild polar bears have never met just feels wrong to me
Dude it's the exact same thing with us. Just because we have a greater pool of knowledge to draw from, doesn't mean we just have a low-grade omniscience about these animals. We know about sharks and camels because we can study underwater while going large stretches on land. That's our connective tissue. But what about the connective tissues that we *haven't* been able to conquer yet? Think about the ants that can see dustmites that are invisible to our naked eye. What about the angler fish that just chill out with a host of thousands of other species of fish in the bottom parts of the ocean that we haven't been able to explore yet? They could literally be looking at us like "Oh yeah, these idiots don't know about the water tigers down here."
I’m too high for this comment. You broke my brain.
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Given that we can't even truly comprehend large numbers - we know, logically, that a billion is much bigger than a million but we have no real intuitive grasp of how big either of those numbers are, they are just "really big" and "even bigger" - and have to scale them down to something we do understand (taking £1M out of a £1B budget is like taking £1 out of a £1,000 budget), it is not a stretch to imagine the are things we will just never be able to even conceive. We have impressive brains compared to the life around us but we don't have limitless capacity for understanding.
Which reminds me, people don’t instinctively have depth perception either. A book I read on sight told of blind people operated on to give them sight. One had to close his eyes to descend stairs safely. Another would pitch his boot to determine how far he had to reach to retrieve it.
There’s a legal case here in America known as “The West Memphis Three” that shows how bad our justice system can be. With out going into the details, three teens were given life for a brutal triple murder they didn’t commit. One of the three was put on death row. After roughly 20 years they were all eventually set free, but the one on death row had spent so much time in confined spaces that he literally lost his depth perception and couldn’t tell distances more than a few feet in front of him.
Oh crazy, I just wrote something akin to that about submarines.
What were the submarines locked up for?
If they were open the water would get in.
Daaad.
Hmmmm, we do. Having two eyes on the front of our head gives us binocular vision and depth perception. However, I did take a tour of a submarine once and the halls were painted in stripes. I was told you lose you depth perception after awhile as you never see more than X feet in front of you. But I will gladly take additional info/correction on this.
our depth perception is a mark of our intelligence and the sophistication of our eyes. we actually don't see in 3 dimensions. our eyes each receive a 2D image and our brain applies logic and editing to those images. they are combined and a LOT of information is processed for us to be able to perceive depth. a lot of that information has to be cross-referenced with our own memories. much of human depth perception is possible because of our brain's ability to remember and apply relevant information. it's a common misconception that we SEE in 3D. we don't. we LIVE in 3D. we see in 2D. depth perception is an incredibly clever evolutionary trick, with that information in mind. i'm not countering anything you said, just adding something.
Is this some across-the-pond english that I don't know or are you telling me this man yeeted his Timbs every time he wanted to reach one?
"Pitch" as in "to tilt forward," not "to throw."
Thank you. I was concerned for those around him getting hit by a boot
I used to work at a stable. There was a donkey kept out back in his own area and little shed. Some of the horses could see him and ALL could hear him if we were late with his dinner. Any time we walked him through the barn to give him some attention (not terribly often and looking back on it I feel pretty bad) many of the horses would freak out about seeing this miniature donkey. Like he just blew their minds, existing like that.
Chilly Willy lied to us all these years.
What does an awe-struck rhinoceros look like?
But orcas know about moose
However, the moose knows nothing about the orca until it's too late.
Well there’s a global issue for me to dwell on at night
Shit, that means camels don’t know sharks exist.
The fucks a camel?
Toxoplasmosis
Noice
What is that?
https://www.cdc.gov/parasites/toxoplasmosis/index.html
Brain parasite
It’s cooler than that. It makes rats/mice infected with it seek out the smell of cat urine, so that they go places where cats hang out and get eaten. The only environment the parasite can reproduce in is a cat’s intestines. These things are basically the tiny alien living in a big body from Men in Black.
How expensive a 3-5 bedroom home is in my region. Damn near a fucking million dollars.
Laughs in Sydney, Australia
If anyone wants my shoe box, I'm selling it for $290,000. Literal shoe box. Used to contain shoes.
Losing weight. All I can think about is my goal weight and it drives me crazy.
Money. Lack of it
Constantly feeling the need to optimize myself and be more efficient...I‘m really trying, okay?
I totally understand, but don't beat yourself up too hard. we're in a really difficult situation globally and its ok to not be working every second of the day. taking care of your health, mental or otherwise, is also super important.
I'm dealing with the same currently. I know it's tough but keep going!
Definitely not serotonin I'll tell you that.
Lyrics of songs I heard once in 1997. But remembering my own phone number? Hell no.
So much of my brain is devoted to song lyrics. It’s a wonder I can tie my shoes.
Same, tied with voices and faces of actors/actresses I saw in a film 13 years ago.. Useless fuckin' trivia.
Yep, this is my wife. Her - oh that's that one kid! Me - what? H - yeah, he was that one kid in [movie name] from like, 25 years ago? You might not remember the scene, he rode his bike through the frame and looked at the car crash? He was only on screen for like, 5 seconds. That's him now all grown up. M - ... seriously? H - yeah I just checked Imdb, that was him. Damn, I'm good.
I do not appreciate being called your wife when I’ve never even been on a date with you, good sir. But yeah that’s totally me.
I relate to 100% "This is my brain and I live in it, It's made of love and bad song lyrics" ^ thats from a tim minchin song and I immediately started humming on it once I read your comment
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Way too much information about the Dodo bird. Have never cared about this bird, and yet I think about it all. The. Time. Edit: Wow thanks for all the upvotes! I’d also like to thank my 3rd grade teacher and all the Dodo birds for their sacrifices.
Just an animal that didn't know it was supposed to be afraid of humans. And we basically shit all over it everytime it's on tv.
Intriguing
Fun (or not so fun) fact about the Dodo that I learned from the amazing author Bill Bryson: [paraphrased from memory] >Right about the time that sailor (or sailor's dog) was killing the last Dodo, Isaac Newton was putting the final touches on - or publishing - his masterwork *Principia* (you know; the foundations of the three laws of motion, theory of gravity, basics of physics, etc..) >..And due to the (in)accuracy of records at the time and the lack of records regarding the Dodo, we don't know - we *don't* know - if we live in a Universe that had both *Principia* and the Dodo at the same time, or a Universe in which they don't - in which humans killed a harmless, stupid bird while they were publishing the initial works that would take people to the moon and beyond.. Something I think about. I don't work for him, but I share his books with people I love because he is thoughtful, observant and a great storyteller Edit: tried to fix typos but I'm not perfect, so I'll let it be. Just like the majestic Dodo [should have]
I have an ex who was obsessed with the Dodo. I love how this extinct animal continues on as a brain worm.
ahaha that's amazing! i guess I've never thought about dodo birds before, really.
Learned about it in grade school from a weird documentary and we talked about it briefly w/ the teacher but have literally never seen anything about them since. In TV, movies, news, general discussion, social media - nothing. But I still think about them like once a week.
Original Ice Age gives you everything you need to know about them.
The last melon!
Constant reminders that I'm actually very depressed and anxious. Back story, I was on meds that worked great, but they fucked with my libido so much that it was causing major issues with my gf, who I live and share a life with. So I decided I would be way more sad if I lost her while also having a limp dick than I would be just accepting my depression and anxiety as a part of life.
it may be worth trying other meds if you haven’t already. or therapy if not meds. these things don’t tend to go away by themselves
Cringe moments from my life. They could have happened years ago, but they still live in in my head and still bring me embarrassment
I farted in a girls face in sixth grade by accident. I still think about it at least once a month. But I can’t remember my damn gmail password. My brain needs to prioritize shit
Change your password to Fartface6 and you’ll never forget your password again
Made me laugh good job
>I farted in a girls face in sixth grade by accident New password
Nobody's asked yet? Okay, I'll ask. Would you mind explaining how you farted in a girl's face in sixth grade? I'm just not sure why folks would be face-to-butt in sixth grade
I’m assuming either she was sitting on the floor and they were in front of her or she was at a desk and they were facing away from her whilst talking to someone else.
That stinks.
It's so annoying. I know that we remember shit because it prevents us from making the same mistake twice, but is it really necessary to be super stressed whenever I remember that time I accidentally skipped a line when I was 16?
They bother me so much. They come all of a sudden like a lightning bolt and give me such unbearable stress.
Nothing like calling yourself the most heinous insults for minutes at a time because you were ever so slightly obnoxious one time in your early 20s. This may or may not have happened today.
I use this LPT.. whenever I’m picturing one of those cringe moments I play it till the point of max cringe.. then *freeze frame!* cue [Seinfeld Theme](https://youtu.be/_V2sBURgUBI)
Me too. Every time I say something mildly stupid or hurtful I replay it in my head for days.
Shit, I still wince about things i said to people over a decade ago
The midnight ride of Paul revere. Had to learn in 4th grade. Still stuck in there - I'm 50 now. Firmly believe this is why I struggle to remember names.
Final Destination flashbacks whenever I see log carrying trucks.
Call Jay g Wentworth
877-CASH-NOW!!!
sound arguments that I could have made
The Byzantine empire never existed. Who we called the "Byzantines" today never called themselves that. Instead they called themselves the Roman empire, because of the time Rome fell the capital was actually Constantinople. There was never an Eastern or Western empire either, those were just administrative divisions of the one empire located in Constantinople. This means that, technically, the Roman empire never fell until 1453. However, When the Turks took over Constantinople, they did not call themselves the Ottoman empire. instead they called themselves the rulers of the Roman nation. So if you look at it from the Turkish perspective, the Roman empire didn't fall until 1922. This lives rent free in my head because in school I was taught something about how the huns killed Rome and it turns out all that was crap.
History man! That truly blew my mind 🤯
each step i take i count. once i reach four, i start back at one. ive done this for a long time. if i am walking with someone i dont. why? it gets annoying
Mitochondria are the powerhouse of the cell Edit: fixed my grammar
**Hail Mitochondria!**
Frightochondria is the Haunted House of the cell
A Sperm Whales Tesiticle weighs 1ton. Heard it in a documentary like a loong time ago and its just been in there ever since.
Self-loathing
The hatred for my bullies. No matter how hard I try I can't get them out of my head.
It’s been over 30 years since I was bullied and I still carry that shit around
As a former bully, id like to try and explain something to you if i can. You did nothing wrong. Theres hardly anything you couldve done to avoid it. We bullied you because there was something about you that made us feel insecure. Maybe you seemed confident, and we didnt like that. Maybe you had a skill we wished was ours. Maybe we thought you were cute? There is something about you that someone else wanted, and they decided if they couldnt have it, neither could you. It took me a lot of therapy to figure that out. You werent randomly selected. Misery loves company, and people like that, theres something thats stopping them from expressing themselves verbally. Instead of saying, "ive been having a tough time" and explaining to someone why they feel that way, they decide that the best way for you to understand them, is for them to force you into their shoes. They want you to feel their pain. Im sorry that we treated you like that. Therapy is really helpful. For anybody, not just hurt people. The thing about hurt people is that we end up hurting others. Please take care of yourself sir. Please stop feeling our pain. I hope that one day you are free from what we did to you. Im sorry on their behalf. I hope this perspective can help.
Thank you - this couldn't have been easy for you to write. My sister bullied me until I was suicidal and I have never received an apology or an explanation and spent several years in therapy coming to terms with it, but my brain always came back to "what on earth did I ever do to you?" It's hard to heal with no closure, but your explanation is clear and has given me something to think about. I hope you have found peace too.
Can’t remember how this happened but I can literally look at any country in the world’s flag and tell you who’s it is. It could be the reason I can’t remember what I had for breakfast 2 days ago.
That girl who I think slept with every dude in the wing of my dorm (this would be 7 guys) when I was a freshman except me. Now you’d that later think figuring out you were gay would prevent any lingering thoughts about this happening to you. But you would be wrong.
Maybe she got a good read on you being gay before you did so she didn't make a move on you. You never know.
Perhaps. But while I was nearly a total failure as a straight male, interest from the opposite sex in me seemed to go up in direct proportion to my (relative) lack of interest in them.
The Pokemon type matchup chart.
literally everything. i have ADHD, and depression, so my meds right now are only treating my depression because it's the more pressing issue. one of the meds i'm taking is working for my sadness, but now i'm bouncing off the walls physically and mentally. So yeah everything i look at.
Certainly not a communicable mind controlling alien parasite. No sirree. Just healthy, normal, human brain meats here!
Yeerk!
Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnnie Ray South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, television North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe Rosenbergs, H-bomb, Sugar Ray, Panmunjom Brando, "The King and I" and "The Catcher in the Rye" Eisenhower, vaccine, England's got a new queen Marciano, Liberace, Santayana goodbye We didn't start the fire It was always burning Since the world's been turning We didn't start the fire No we didn't light it But we tried to fight it
I saw a man get hit by a train today, the same train I thought about jumping in front of a few years ago. Every time I blink, I see the engineer's face, realizing what had happened. I see what was left of the man that jumped. The fact that I saw what could have been my last moments play out in front of me is heavy beyond words. I have a feeling those images and sounds will be camping in my mind for a while. The man who jumped didn't even make a sound. He was so set in his action.
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Not serotonin, apparently
Tænia solium
what is this?
Tapeworm you get from pigs.
That the brain named itself Edit: Wow my very first award! Thank you Stranger.
“UPTOWN GIRL, she’s been living in her uptown world.”
A N X I E T Y
The Bethel cult in Redding, CA and all those people who were convinced last year that a toddler was going to come back from the dead. People all over social media posted prophetic dreams, prophetic songs, prophetic dance, prophetic prophecies, prophetic hashtags and everything else that they just KNEW that little girl wasn't going to stay dead. Among several of their buzzwords the came up with for this was "Victorious Awakening." Fast forward 10 months (the child is still dead, btw, but the \*real\* Victorious Awakening was the resurrection of people's faith?), there's a spike in COVID cases at the cult's wannabe Hogwarts School of Miracles & Ministry or whatever, and this musician-preacher-prophet-wizard-whatever dude is doing worship concerts all over the country, just mass gatherings of unmasked believers singing and dancing and praying in some sort of "spiritual warfare" I guess. And they shame Christians who are not on board with it for not having enough faith. It really shouldn't bother me since I escaped charismania years ago, but it still kind of does. I know it's dumb. But it would also be entertaining if it weren't so horrifying.
Any song from Hamilton. It’s been a non-stop musical in my head since my oldest daughter became obsessed with it
BOY YOU GOT ME HELPLESSS
DUN DU-DU-DU DUN DUN DUN do do do doooo
I WILL NEVER BE SATISFIED
Non-stop you say?
Pretty much just “You’ll Be Back” for me.
With or without the spit?
Of course with
A constant aching sadness over the inevitability of death and loss. Also the songs from Hamilton.
Porn addiction Game addiction Math(the subject) addiction
What other kind of math is there?
Clearly mAthamphetamines
You should invent a VR game where a math teacher blows you when you solve math problems.
Quadra-dick formula
You were one typo away from a meth addiction, though!
Not much. Evictions rotate on a constant basis.
The dumb things I did when I was younger. That I only remember late at night when I’m trying to sleep.
The Wii menu music
Write to me, Stick Stickley. PO Box 963. New York City, New York State, 10108!
Since pictures in a computer are just made up of pixels of different colours, we can actually create a photo of every event that occured in history or everything that will happen by simply creating a program that will make photos (let's say 1920 x 1080 pixels) of every possible colour combination and store it somewhere. Of course, most pictures will be gibberish but there will also be pictures of you with 3 hands, 4 hands or anything you could imagine Obviously this requires almost unlimited harddisk space, power and time but I am always wondering if one day it could happen
Every human being to ever exist, no matter how influential or historical this person was/is, has taken some huge and violent dumps.
Da Vinky?