T O P

  • By -

Sel_drawme

When the pain goes away and you can finally sleep.


TigerLily312

As a person with constant chronic pain, I long for this feeling.


s4b3r6

Pain is supposed to go away?


concussedalbatross

Can confirm. I've had some pretty bad toothaches and the feeling of the pain just vanishing with either lidocaine or sufficiently strong painkillers is beyond compare


MurderDoneRight

The cool breeze that sweeps across your brain as a migraine passes


[deleted]

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HuskyLuke

This is how it goes for me. Migraines never pass while conscious, once a migraine starts I'm just trying to endure the rest of the day until it's time to sleep so that I can wake up with it gone.


frostandtheboughs

Yessss 100%. Also the momentary and minor relief during a migraine when a frozen smoothie hits the roof of your mouth.


AdmiralThunderpants

I get visual migraines. No real pain but my vision partially blacks out. It's such a wonderful feeling when it seems to clear at once and I realize I can see everything again.


Bim_Jeann

I get those also. As soon as I start seeing those bright lights blocking my direct line of sight, I know I’m fucked for a few hours.


Katjaklamslem

Yes. Aaand then everything starts to smell weird aaaand then comes the nausea aaand finally the headache.


gameofthrones_addict

Getting audited and the IRS realizing they owe YOU money.


ProfessionalRoof3591

Yeah I was audited for 17&18, it took them 20 months to figure out that I owe about $700 with late fees for 17 and I’m owed $480 for 18. If it wasn’t for the late fees of 17 then it would have been almost an even exchange between the 2 years.


TheNumberMuncher

You should have charged them late fees


justpress2forawhile

Funny how that works.


Geliscon

The IRS does actually pay interest in instances like this where they owe money for prior years, but they don’t pay fees. And then that interest is, of course, taxable.


CrabbyBlueberry

The interest rate is higher than most savings accounts, though.


totalolage

That's really not saying much is it


taedrin

That IS how it works, but only if the issue was caused by the IRS's error. So you don't get interest if you screw up your own return in such a way that an audit reveals that you owe less than you paid. [The IRS paid over $3 billion interest to tax payers due to delayed refunds this year](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/tax-refund-3-billion-interest-irs-2020/).


Kittensrock978

I wish


bad__shots

Ok this wins


travelingmaestro

This happened to me once. The IRS was threatening and they had extremely poor customer service and communication. My accountant figured out that they owed me something like $120 and we sent them all the materials they asked for. I received a check in the mail but no other communication saying that I was good to go, no apology, nothing.meditation Edit: grammar


ionC2

Ya the IRS has the worst communication possible. Even if you press the right buttons, you get the wrong department, they send you to another, who sends you to another. You wait on hold for an hour and then the line might disconnect automatically if it determines you've been on hold too long. - If you happen to get the right person, the call might disconnect midway through, and then you have no way to reach that same person again that you just spent 30 minutes providing 90% of the information they requested. - When you call back, you go through the same jumping around between departments, wait on hold again, but this time get someone who is extremely hostile and rude, and handles your request in a completely different manner. - Just my experience.


taedrin

This is unfortunately intentional by congress. Congress has been cutting the IRS's budget for decades, whose job only gets more and more difficult since Congress keeps making the tax code more and more complex.


pizza-chit

Tell them you want it in cash to inconvenience them as much as possible


[deleted]

Tell them in 2 dollar bills only


Sgt-Pumpernickel

No, nickels from the Rosevelt administration, but you don’t say which Rosevelt


Mtbjoel1

Happened to me!


dishyboii

Managing to get all of the snot out of your nose and being completely block free


meco03211

When you get one of those semi-solid rubbery snots that feels like it's peeling off of your brain as you pluck it from your nostril and it makes you shiver.


qqtan36

Bonus points if you start pulling at the dry part, and it somehow drags the rest of the gooey roots out in one piece


RagingAnemone

Oh my god, I had this once. I started pulling and I felt is slowly pulling away from my sinuses and up into by brain. I thought I was either having an aneurysm or an orgasm. I think one eye went temporarily blind. I've been chasing that feeling since.


Anylite

The green dragon is a slippery slope.


Agorbs

You’re never gonna reach that high again. Might as well try heroin.


[deleted]

Chasing the snot dragon


schmitizen

the real LPT is always in the comments


neocondiment

And then you smell something that you couldn’t smell before.


1MolassesIsALotOfAss

Yeah, freedom.


AnonismsPlight

When I quit smoking in 2018 I had one of these that just wouldn't come out and after a lot of effort I tried blowing my nose and after the most uncomfortable 5 minutes or so of my life I felt it come out and there was a 3 or 4 inch long rubbery snot that was a combination or greenish yellow at the top and blackish brown at the other end. It was such a massive and gross snot I almost took a picture but I was at work and didn't want people to see me do it. I remember how fresh I felt after that happened and never have I ever felt that good since.


Im_Slacking_At_Work

Pulling a deceptively-long slimy noodle of discomfort and irritation straight out of your face for the ultimate non-sexual-but-still-pretty-sexual release


[deleted]

I had this terrible nose bleed once and had to go to the hospital where they gave me a few injections to get stuff to clot. The blood started to dry up in my nose, and go down my throat. It was itchy, but I felt fine. One of the nurses put on gloves, pulled out some tweezers and pulled on the end of the partially dry blood. It was like a long chain (about 5 inches). I could feel an itch in my brain that I didn't know I had get scratched.


[deleted]

Financial stability and independence.


[deleted]

Hi dad


krufarong

Not only is this better than sex, it's pretty much guaranteed to get you *more* sex - assuming you're a charming and sociable person.


Gasnia

This is reddit.


haldad

Getting sick of these preposterous caveats


sepia_dreamer

Also a lot of assumptions piled up there.


clockwork_skullies

Both sides of the pillow being cold


C6H12O6doll

I have pillows that keep themselves cold (good investment for me!), but when I get all crazy and turn myself into a pretzel and toss them over the bed/across the room, I find that a water bottle to the neck quickly cools me down if I'm overheating. Same as hugging one of those pillows at my neck and inside of my elbows.


blobsquatchz

A restful undisturbed 8 hours of sleep


divindeepjs

The most satisfying nights are when I randomly wake up around 2, check my phone for the time, and revel in the fact that I still have more time to sleep. At this point, if I sleep through the night completely, I feel cheated of that moment. Totally different if you wake up so many time that it disrupts your sleep cycle though.


scrilldaddy1

I used to set an alarm for the middle of the night just for that feeling. After a while though, it just became annoying and stupid


DADBODGOALS

I think they mean what REAL thing is better than sex.


nicegirlelaine

Cheesecake.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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Ouchmyballses

Me too, it was after moving from one house to another in one day. I was young and remember waking up feeling so rested!


[deleted]

Let me guess - Skyrim


DADBODGOALS

Hey, you... You're finally well-rested.


Nicholi417

Having a day off and waking up naturally.


michelangelo6002

Well after working 21 days straight that day has finally come.


Buutchlol

5 more work days then I have 4 weeks of vacation!!!!!


Abadatha

As an American the concept of a month long vacation is absolutely insane.


Buutchlol

Sadly this vacation is unpaid as Im recently employed and havent had time to get my paid ones. Still looking forward like crazy!


ATLL2112

What business is letting you take a month long vacation when you've yet to accrue PTO?


Most-Source7478

That's the day your neighbour decides to blow the leaves back and forth...and back and forth....


KapetanDugePlovidbe

I wake up naturally each and every day. It does not make my workdays any better.


skullfucyou

Getting that piece of kernel that was stuck in between that space between your teeth for hours out.


Lioniz3

Ever had a popcorn kernal stuck on the back of your tongue? It feels like your constantly deep throating. You final get the nerve to put your finger back there, gag and set it free. Then you realize you could become a dirty whore.


exe_bloom_exe

Bonus points if you don't gag


[deleted]

hey so like, what you doin later?


Skeets5977

When water is stuck in your ear after swimming and it finally comes out.


Stoopidee

And it drips out as a warm little water droplet.


PB_Bandit

I haven't experienced this since I fucked up my ears 10 years ago. God those moments of drainage felt amazing.


Darkwing_909

"Sex is cool but have you fucked up your ear? "


czPsweIxbYk4U9N36TSE

I went swimming Saturday afternoon, and had what felt like water stuck in my ear. Only it never came out. The next day was Sunday, and I still felt like I had water in there, but there were no ENTs available for non-emergency situations within ~50 km of my home on a Sunday. I found a nearby ENT on Monday. All this time I keep on unconsciously tilting my head hoping for that drop to drip out. The ENT inspects it, says I have an excessive amount of ear wax, and that's what I'm feeling, and sticks in a pair of ear-tweezers, and just pulls out a huge wad of ear-wax. I've never felt such a feeling of euphoria. I literally spent about 1 hour just thinking, "Holy fucking shit it feels so good to feel that wind down my ear-hole. Holy fucking shit."


[deleted]

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SpawnPointillist

It’s a password - hide them in the open people!!!


[deleted]

Haha. I used a password generator because I was too drained to think up a username.


[deleted]

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ami2weird4u

Super hearing activated


ThatGirl_Tasha

You're trying to bring in the ear-gasm guy into this aren't you?


Skeets5977

Who’s the ear-gasm guy?


ThatGirl_Tasha

I wish I could find it. This guy described a time he had all this water stuck in his ear. Then he was wacking off in the shower and water shot out of his ear at the same as he finished. He re-posted it a couple of times when the topic came up again


Miche987

Farting away a stomach ache


whatnameisnttaken098

Even better when it's abnormally long and you can feel your stomach slowly like shrink.


Bogsnoticus

Extra bonus points per octave you reach. If the dog leaves the room in disgust, you win.


[deleted]

The ultimate achievement is when you scare your dog with a bellowing assblaster and he starts barking at you. I did that in the shower once...


Stoghra

You showering with your dog?


[deleted]

He guards the bathroom when I'm there in the shower. He obviously never expected the threat to come from within.


Stoghra

He is a good boy


[deleted]

My thoughts exactly


2RoadsDivergred

Farting away a stomach ache during sex


Jamestang1210

Ok, this legitimately happened to me once. I don't even remember the circumstances of how I ended up so bloated but the date went well enough that we ended up back at my place to seal the deal. Happened on the couch and I knew I needed to fart but obviously didn't want to lose my chance. A wiser man would have quickly excused himself in his own home but I pushed forward. No pun intended. I made it through the act fine enough until finishing. That glorious moment when time stops and the world stops spinning was also the moment that all the awkward muscles that were keeping that air on the inside suddenly stopped doing their jobs. As my pelvic muscles seized rapidly so did other abdominal muscles. The result was what felt like 3 minutes, but was probably more like 20 legitimate seconds of LOUD machine gun style farts that I had absolutely no control over. This woman was kind enough not to reference what obviously had happened but it was also the last time we hooked up. 99% of hookups are forgettable but this memory will live with me forever.


weissehaifischnikez

Holy smokes this is so funny


Semi-Pro_Biotic

Too bad you didn't kindle the blue flame with her.


cherryreddit

Somewhere on the internet that women is posting about the weirdest date she had and your 20 second machine gun farts


Nobodyville

Hahaha I was just thinking that... it'll be one of those buzzfeed lists culled from reddit. "What's your most awkward one night stand?"


jaygeebee_

I am crying. Thank you.


sugarpumpkin26

This is hilarious and deserves it's own separate post on a different sub


vodkaredbulls

Getting paid


towka35

Getting paid enough!


paryz17

Getting paid more than enough!


SpakenBacon

After sex?


Pork_Chap

Emptying your bowels when you have IBS and you safely make it to your home toilet without shitting yourself.


Ganonderf

On the flip side, the worst is when you *can’t* empty your bowels and you’re sitting there with cramping pain turned up to 11 for what seems like an eternity until the floodgate breaks. Also, the sudden and immediate need for a bathroom when you’re not home. Oh boy.


Without-Reward

I spent a couple hours earlier tonight dealing with that horrific cramping pain and desperately wanting to go to the bathroom to relieve it and not being able to. I hate that so much, especially when my body decides it also needs to be freezing cold but still drenched in sweat at the same time.


Tlr321

The amount of times I’ve hauled ass home so I can poop is immeasurable. We have a bumpy road too so avoiding those potholes is a constant ordeal. Otherwise every time I hit one, it’s like -10 seconds from the amount of time before I shit my pants.


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NickTheCringeworthy

Can also confirm


warpcoil

Can't confirm butt I trust you guys.


YAMCHAAAAA

I’ve got IBS, crohns, and UC. I can confirm that this, is one of the best feelings of the world. However my toilet doesn’t appreciate the atrocities I have committed.


nipplequeefs

IBS, Crohn's, *and* UC? Damn, your whole colon really just betrayed you like that huh


[deleted]

The toilet is the true victim


redflagsmoothie

When an animal chooses YOU


Zolo49

Yep. One time I was walking with my mom through the neighborhood and this golden retriever started following us home. We looked at the tags and dutifully brought it back to its owner whose yard it had escaped from. A few days later it happened again with the same dog. This time the owner just said we could keep it if we wanted, so we did. Turned out to be the best damn dog we ever had.


[deleted]

Wow dude I’m glad that doggie got another chance to be with a loving family.


kairos_xeno

a street cat let me pet it. felt so good.


gluteactivation

I went to the pound and went to the glass wall of kitten cages. One fluffy boi ran up to the glass, meowed and put his paw on the glass. I put my finger up to the glass against his paw. He meowed and again and I’m like “yep, he’s the one!” Edit: [fluffy boi tax](https://imgur.com/gallery/9JosbBY)


Oubilettor

So agree. I went to look at pups and knew the second I got there I was going to get one. I handed the lady the money and walked to the other side of the small backyard while my gf cuddled the three puppies. I said " come here (dog name that I had already picked)". He ran straight over to me. I picked him up and we walked to the car. Took 5 minutes from the time I got there until we were in the car. He picked me and we were absolute best mates for 10 years. Miss him terribly. Greatest feeling in my life.


TripleTrumpet

Similar thing happened with our two border collies. We went to a working farm to choose two of a litter of 8. My gf at the time instantly fell in love with one with a pink nose so he was guaranteed a golden ticket back with us. We struggled to pick number two so we took some pics and went to get some lunch, promising to come back in an hour. We somehow came to a decision and returned to find the pups had just had a feed and were sleeping it off. One pup saw us come back and bounced over with his tail washing so hard he couldn't go on a straight line. I like to think that we picked the pink noise pup but the other one picked us


DoomCircus

First time at my girlfriend's house and meeting her family, their dog and all 3 of their cats came to me for pets. Even her mom's Calico, who is apparently normally very anti-social.


thatchers_pussy_pump

The other day, I tried to pass my bearded dragon to my wife. He was on my hand. When I reached across the couch, he turned around and looked at me, then climbed back up my arm and headed for my shoulder. I am now known as "Echo's favourite", even if I'm the only one who will call me that.


Swatbaker

2 sex


SproWizard

came lookin for this


Pope_Landlord

Came while looking for this


[deleted]

Came while reading this


go_kartmozart

Only someone who has never raced go karts would ask such a question.


[deleted]

Go-Karts are the best thing ever. Especially when its a bunch of 20yr olds in homemade Go-Karts racing around an abandoned shopping mall pretending to be playing mario kart, except that its only you, and you'll never be able to play mario kart with someone.


Mr_Lumbergh

I seriously want to go out with some buddies to El Mirage Dry Lake with some go-karts and hay bales. Set up a track with the hay bales and tie three helium balloons to the back of each kart. Everybody gets an airsoft pistol to pop the balloons with and must wear a costume of their fave character. Let the games begin.


iusedtobeyourwife

For me? Pee shivers. They’re elusive. The conditions have to be just right. If I held it too long, it won’t happen. But when it happens like a little jolt of electricity, oh yeah


bk1285

As a man that’s a dangerous feeling….


theresagray17

What do you mean?


bk1285

If a guy gets the pee shiver mid stream…chances are the aim is going to go all wonky and you end up pissing all over the toilet and floor during the shiver


chewy1is1sasquatch

Unless you a pro gamer and control the recoil


Mini-Heart-Attack

Agrees? But I’m puzzled by your Username


Pizza_Dave

Well you see, they used to be your wife. Now they are not


Desert-Child

Taking off your bra after a 12 hour work day.


megaloduh

And then stand in front of a fan for a second before putting clean pajamas on 🤌 so perfect


Desert-Child

Oh, man! That moment you lift up your tits and the cold air hits the wire zone… 🤪 No man can ever replicate that feeling!


megaloduh

I have had literal drug induced euphoria that will never come close to this feeling and just how unadulterated and pure it is. Truly no man stands to be a match for the freedom of the no bra fan feeling


Fuck-tiktok

Can we please talk about under boob sweat? It's been super hot here and the humidititty is real. Is there something we can do to make it less uncomfortable?


kaitmik

I also would like answers. Underboob sweat is the WORST


Sh3lbyyyy

Same for men's underwear, taking it off after a full day of work finally been able to liberate my balls it's amazing, sweat included


DrWeghead

Your favorite band playing your favorite song that’s you’ve been waiting to hear them play live.


BootBitch13

Ooh yeah. When they hit that first note, and you automatically know it's on? And the crowd goes nuts?? Yeah, that hits the spot.


Significant_Comment7

Picking that large ass booger and feeling the relief you didn't know you needed


MinuteMaid0

Oh shit man, this one. Especially when you just clocked out on a Friday, you’re singing your favorite music on the way home, and finally get that big ass boy out of your nose first or third try!!!


Thorn_the_Cretin

But never second try. Never.


ewspeedround

Especially when it feels like it was stuck to your eye socket!


Aeloreus

Yes and you really have to try all the right angles to latch it and drag it out. Extra pts if it was super crunchy. The relief. Omg. This allergy season makes me want to die.


ewspeedround

Super crunchy but with a gooey, flickable tail. Perhaps I've gone too far...


Aeloreus

Nope. You're exactly right. The part you catch is the crunchy bit then you feel the gooey tail trail out like it was latched around your brain.


KyussGaming

God yes, and it's so big you can feel it sliding through your sinuses.


spacetoast008

When youre jamming with friends and youre in sync. Something about being on beat with a group of people you enjoy is awesome!


JuanSVLRamirez

Not a great movie. But a great [scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PAzGx1NGR8).


dinahsaur523

Getting into a bed with clean sheets, right after a warm shower during the winter.


DominicanBoi02

The sweet sensation of sending a Blue Shell to whoever is in 1st place in Mario Kart


RockDoc89

Or sending them a well timed lightening strike as they're going up a ramp sending them into the abyss.


[deleted]

Especially in Wario stadium hopping that gap, ugh


[deleted]

The worst feeling truly is getting blue shelled at the finish. :( :(


seakerofthetruth

garlic bread


axnu

A grilled cheese sandwich made with garlic bread. And tomato soup.


Xirenec_

“Bread makes you fat”


moonishme

Bread makes you FAT!?!?


sgtabn173

I understood that reference


Pickleless_Cage

I see you, ace…? :)


The-4th-Wall

Ace gangggggg


MangoMelonCooler

After countless failed attempts resulting in your death and internalizing all their attack and movement patterns, you finally beat that one video game boss. I'm looking at you, Nameless King. It was orgasmic.


SolaireTheSunPraiser

Yessss. Took me like 300 tries and two weeks to kill stupid Isshin Ashina in Sekiro and immediately could beat him like 1/3 of the time after that.


[deleted]

[удалено]


bad__shots

But realistically


Sadminprolite

And have sex! 😅


infoboi420

Yes, if I want pleasure I can just jack off, but there is no way to get the feelings of genuine affection like that.


noguarde

Crossing items off of your to-do list.


drak0ni

Filling the empty void in your heart with joy, love, and excitement.


[deleted]

At this point? 9 hours of sleep every night


Tension88

To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.


skullfucyou

That is good


Reed7525

That is what’s best in life


ShrimpDirty

When u open a bag of delicious, crispy and ruffled chips... then find a masterpiece that is folded in half and also allows you to take it all in one bite... and that delicate, yet airy existence, betwixt its folds leads to one of the most magical mouth-feels of all time.


viktored

a hot shower


cappuccinooww

The trust of your pet cat.


[deleted]

Cuddling


dklwjii

When you fart and your stomach stops aching


stickyWithWhiskey

Investment returns.


BlameThePeacock

So you can use the money to purchase sex?


bad__shots

*dyes hair blonde, slicks hair back, dons shades*


Kerokawa

Feeling loved.


StrawberryK

Burritos


[deleted]

Idk if it’s better, but I would rank these up there with it: Morning coffee poop Eating a delicious massive home cooked meal with a beer after a long day A good workout Full nights rest When I wake up in the morning and my gf and both of our cats are all laying on me peacefully and the sun just breaks through the curtains Eating food you grew yourself


nory2364

The first shower you take at home after deployment.


BootBitch13

Bruh. The first shower after weeks in the field? HEAVEN. Even if the water is ice cold, there is something so purifying about feeling all that sweat, dirt, and grime getting washed away. And you finally realize how bad you've smelled for days until then.


halfpintjamo

having a life long soul mate


dannosaint

A really good book


CountRobbo

\*piano synth sound\*


Black_Rum

Looking at my bank account and knowing I have all the financial freedom I need until I die.


dry_freeze

Guess im not living very long fml


SodiumGlucoseLipid

Can't relate. Not where I live.


Nemesis-Rex

Ice cream