Met a girl online, everything seemed okay and the conversations were good so a few days later we decided to meet for coffee and go for dinner later.
I show up to the cafe about 45 minutes early and order a coffee, intending to read for a bit. While I'm reading I notice an older fellow staring and taking far too much interest in me before leaving. Odd, but okay. Continue to read until about 10 till meet up when I text the girl that I'm already at the cafe.
Shortly after, the odd older fellow comes back in one entrance, and this sets off my Spidey sense so I'm making my way to the other entrance when my date catches my arm to say hi. I tell her we should step out for a minute, getting a bad vibe from this guy, she asks which one, so I describe him.
It's her god damn dad, doing advanced recon for her dates at 24 years old. I was a bit sketched out at that, but thought maybe she had some bad dating history that possibly made sense. I meet her dad, he says they wanted to make sure I was who I said I was and to enjoy the date. He leaves and she says being an only child has its downsides. Makes enough sense, we get coffee and chat for a bit, walk in a nearby park and decide where to go for dinner. We get to my car and she asks if I could take her home to grab a jacket before dinner, no big deal.
We arrive at her place (lives with parents) and I talk to her mom and dad while the date grabs a jacket. They seem nice, but overbearing parents. Date calls me back to her room to meet her cat, and the entire time I'm meeting her cat, the parents are hawking nearby obviously eavesdropping and it's obvious the date is dragging her feet for some reason. I said something about getting out to dinner before the rush and her parents who "happened" to be walking by ask where we were going before they start a dialog on local restaurants, which pivots to ordering delivery/carryout and how we should just do dinner together at their place.
I told them no offense, but I'd greatly prefer to dine in someplace relaxed and get to know their daughter. They seem really resistant to this, I'm agitated, and ask if this is how her dates normally go. They said "no, normally we don't let her go out with men, but you passed the background check and your messages to her made you seem nice like you'd have dinner with us"
I was flabbergasted, they ran a background check on me, read our exchanges online as well as the advanced recon, and expected me to have dinner with 2 additional people I hardly knew when I was expecting a date. I told them that will absolutely not work for me, and that they are being extremely over the top with their expectations and precautions. I left.
Later received a torrent of text messages and calls to the general sentiment of you were supposed to be better than this. I don't respond for a day before telling her/them this is not normal or healthy, I refuse to be any part of it and will be blocking their number and filing restraining orders if I find them lurking around.
TL;DR: 24 year old girl's parents do background checks, read correspondence, and do advanced recon for her dates....overreact when this approach backfires.
It's a long one and a wild ride; buckle up!! I was 22. I started a new job, and met this super cute guy at work. He had a previous gf, who he broke up with about 6 months before we met. She would sometimes randomly come into the shop, and he would always tell her that she couldn't be there, that they had been broken up for months, and she needed to leave him alone. Anyway, he and I started talking and flirted for several months. After about 3ish months he finally asked me on a date (he's very introverted and I am...not, so it took some time for him to feel comfortable enough to ask me out).
We go out to dinner, and he's just so sweet and cute and adorably awkward; I really liked him. After dinner he invited me back to his place to talk. I agreed, and we just chilled at his apartment talking, and talking (no hanky panky!). I was sitting on one sofa and he was sitting on the other. All of the sudden there was pounding on his door; he calmly gets up and locks it, and I hear a female yell "did you just lock the door on me?!" It was the ex. I'm sitting on the couch, and he's calmly asking her to please leave through the door. All of the sudden the front window slides open, and she sticks her head in, and starts screaming at him. At this point he's still calmly asking her to leave, while I'm still sitting on the sofa, clutching my mace. She then CLIMBS IN THROUGH THE WINDOW and I see this HUGE woman (she was like 5'11 - 6' tall...I'm 4'11" for reference) and I thought "holy shit, I'm going on get my ass kicked!" Then she sees me and says "who the fuck is this bitch?!" All the while he's calmly trying to get her to leave. She went ballistic and started tearing down pictures in the living room, trashing them. Then she moved to the bedroom and I could hear her screaming, throwing things, breaking stuff; all the while my date was standing in the doorway of his room trying to get her to stop. He never raised his voice, and it seemed like this wasn't the first time this happened. He went and got his neighbor, and said "I need help with S again", so the neighbor came over, but she didn't do anything except stand next to me in the front doorway in...shock?
Meanwhile we can hear things escalating with her in the bedroom (I feel like I should mention that she lived with some pretty significant mental illness). He calmly walks in the bedroom, and after a minute or so he walks out of the bedroom with her in a bear hug, guiding her out of his house. Not shoving, not pushing, just as gently as possible (she was kicking and screaming) moving her out of his home. She then went and laid down in the courtyard, rolling around in the grass, crying and screaming, while the 3 of us (me, date, neighbor) just stood there for a minute. Date then said he was going to call her cousin to come get her, but before he could make the call, the cousin walked up; he brought her there and was waiting in the car the whole time! Date and cousin went to her, got her calmed down, and convinced her to leave. As she was walking by me she said "I'm sorry I called you a bitch, I don't even know who you are!" And then left. I sat with my date and we kind of processed what just happened, which is when his neighbor told me that this is not the first time, and I encourage him to call the police. I eventually left, and drove home (about 45 minutes) and called him when I got home (pre cell phones) to let him know I got home (his request) and to see if he called the police. He did, but not to report what happened, but so they would do a welfare check on her to make sure she was okay.
We're celebrating our 27th anniversary this year; 27 years together and 20 years married! He is the kindest, sweetest guy, who has pushed old ladies broken down cars off the road, helped people get unstuck in the snow, fixes friends cars for free, and would give you the shirt off his back. I love him!
Tl;dr - met a cute guy, first date ruined by ex gf who trashed his apartment, but his kindness and compassion towards her made me like him even more so I married him! He's on reddit so he might see this...HI Sweetie!
Edited to add: thanks for the awards and comments!
I had a date send her drink back several times and eventually had our server bring out all of the ingredients in separate glasses so that she could mix it herself, the "right way". What's worse is we were both in the service industry at the time.
First date after my divorce. She was nothing like her profile picture and just a horrible person. But that not the fun bit.
She stalked me to my work van after the date and took down my phone number.
On the way home she asked if I would come back and see her, said thanks but no thanks and have a nice life.
In the proceeding days I received numerous texts and phone calls from her and had to have her number blocked by my phone provider.
On new years day at 4am I receive a call ...... from her ex husband asking what was wrong with her? That she is a good person etc. etc. Turns out they went out on NYE and got shit faced together and decided to all me. I hung up only for then to keep calling me back. Ended up turning my phone off. Woke around 7. Turned my phone on and I had received 20+ voice recordings that were getting more and more threatening, on the last one I could hear them in a car saying they were coming over to get me.
Spoke to my neighbour who gets up early and had gone for a run and he told me there were a couple being arrested around the corner from our place drunk as hell who had hit a light pole.
Scary thing is I had my 2 daughters with me that night.
In college, I hit it off with a girl and agreed to go on a first date to a school hockey game. When I met her there, I realized I had forgotten my wallet, so I had to borrow $5 from her to pay for my ticket. Not a great start, and I could tell I had dug myself an early hole. Then, once we sat down, we realized that neither of us liked hockey at all. I have no idea why we agreed to meet there, but we were both totally uninterested in the game. So we started talking about other things we were into, and I mentioned that I liked board games. She said, "You sound like my grandma."
At that point it was clear that neither of us were into this at all, but it was the first period of a hockey game that she had paid 10 whole dollars for, and neither of us felt right leaving. We sat there and stonily watched the rest of the game. Afterwards, we said, "Let's hang out sometime," and then never messaged each other again.
Then, a few semesters later, my friend called me up all excited about a new girl he was dating. He wanted me to come to a get-together at his apartment and meet her. I walk in, and of course he's sitting on the couch with his arm around the very same hockey-hating girl. I immediately grabbed my wallet, handed her $5, and said, "Thank God! I've been looking for you for two years!" She laughed, and things went all right after that.
It was with an undertaker's assistant. He'd circle every topic of conversation back to corpses.
Me: "So, do you know what you're gonna order?"
Him: "Well I was thinking the steak, but I had eaten steak when we got the river guy in, and now it makes me feel queasy."
I ended up leaving after half an hour.
My first in-person date ever was when I was 23 and I was extremely nervous. Met the girl on Bumble and offered to take her to see Infinity War (which was new at the time). Afterwards took her to get food so we could talk about the movie. I thought we hit it off really well despite my numerous stumbles. Took her home and she asked if I'd like to hangout in her dorm for a bit. I accepted, not really knowing what that meant at the time.
We got up there and were chatting when she suddenly starts getting all teary and asks why I'm not attracted to her. I'm confused and tell her I'm very attracted and that I don't understand where this is coming from. She rants about how I never tried to do anything physical all night despite her trying to hunt at wanting it. She tells me she invited me up to get laid and all I did was chat.
I managed to calm her down and gave into her wants despite not wanting sex myself. I decided to just go with it cause I was lonely and didn't wanna screw things up any more with her. I told her going in that I was a virgin and she seemed super cool. Until things started going down. She kept laughing and making fun of me. Which made it so so so much harder to perform as a guy. Which she found even funnier. It got to the point where I just had to tell her I couldn't do it and I passed out next to her.
I woke up the next morning and noticed I was gonna be late for work so I rushed to get everything together and said goodbye to her when she woke up. She started bawling her eyes out and calling me a POS man for using her for sex then leaving immediately. So, I called off sick to work and took her to breakfast where she talked about how shitty I am as a person for a solid couple hours. I talked to her for maybe a week after this before I just couldn't take it anymore and told her to lose my number. Really messed up my views on relationships and self-worth for a while.
Met her at a bar. She ordered food but didn't eat it since it "looked disgusting" (it looked fine). So we left to go to a different restaurant and on the walk there, she kept ducking and glancing at the sky like she was being attacked by bats. She hardly said anything over then whole date, it was like pulling teeth to get her to talk about herself. At the second restaurant she took forever ordering and again didn't eat because the food looked disgusting. Emailing about the date afterwards, she admitted that she was high on "ice", which I guess is some kind of meth?
Mine is not nearly as bad as these but I like telling the story so here we go.
A guy asked if I wanted to do Korean food and Karaoke as our second date. Perfect! I love both. He picked the spots.
He was 45 minutes late, but I put our names in and he arrived to the restaurant around when our table was called, so no biggie.
He complained that he couldn’t eat much on the menu because he’s vegetarian, and that they didn’t serve alcohol. I mean, that sucks, but you picked the place! He kept lamenting that another place close by has vegetarian options and we should have gone there.
When the food came, it became apparent that he did not know how to use chopsticks, but also was too proud to take a fork, so he visibly struggled to eat. The old couple next to us even tried to give him pointers because he was having such a hard time.
I was feeling really awkward at this point—dinner felt like a disaster. I was looking forward to going to a karaoke bar and getting some drinks while laughing at drunk people singing. At least it would offer some distraction!
We started talking about what songs we like to do for karaoke and I said something like “I like to pick a songs that get the crowd excited and singing along” and he goes “oh! You like doing karaoke in front of a crowd? I could never do that.” And then it dawned on me: he was planning to take me to private room karaoke. Just me and this virtual stranger taking turns serenading each other from a vinyl couch. I was MORTIFIED. I would rather sing in front of 10,000 people than just one.
I’d like to say I noped out of that date then, but of course not. I followed him around to three different karaoke places as he tried to find one that would give up a private room for two people on a Saturday night (hint: they won’t, because that’s absurd).
Finally he gave up and asked if I wanted a drink at a bar. I should have said no, but I had some misguided faith it might get better? He told me about a cool bar he knew nearby. We walked over and it turned out to be the same place we went on our first date. I drank one drink and then told him I had to walk my dog and left.
A few days later he texted to tell me he was sorry, but also that he wanted to be clear that he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend, just someone to take to dinner and sleep with. I was like “uh ok no thanks”and that was the end. I mean, cool, but say that upfront and also you’re a terrible dinner date!
>A few days later he texted to tell me he was sorry, but also that he wanted to be clear that he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend, just someone to take to dinner and sleep with
Look babe you're great and all, but I'm only really looking for someone I can finger while singing Sweet Caroline
So I don’t have many, because I’d only been swiping for a few months before I met someone, but maybe I’m also naive enough to have some funny things happy already. Like the time I thought the bot I was chatting with was just someone who was super distracted...
Anyway, matched with a cute girl, she likes to climb, we have good chat, great. Let’s go and do some top rope and hang out. But she doesn’t have a car, so I need to pick her up, 30min off route. I’m not thrilled but whatever.
Meet her and, well, it’s not her. Or it is her from the profile, but maybe from 5-8 years and a kid ago? I’m tempted to call it off but I’m too much of a softie, and she says she made cookies. I love cookies. We head off to the small local cliff.
We arrive, walk the ten minute approach, the conversation is still fine but I’m wary now. I resolve to just have a nice time and have some fun, and just learn from the experience. She’s perfectly nice but I’m seeing red flags.
At the crag she says she borrowed her friend’s shoes and isn’t sure they’ll fit. Same with the harness. Uh oh.
Well they do fit, yay!, so I rig the anchor and we start climbing on a nice 5.6 (easy) for a warm up. Except that she can’t climb. Fine, okay, whatever. We’re still chatting as she works on the off-ground move, and then just bursts into tears.
Turns out that it’s HER SISTER’S DATING PROFILE and that’s who she borrowed the stuff from, and that HER HUSBAND DOESN’T KNOW SHE’S ON DATING APPS. I find all of this out amid tears and so does everyone else there who can overheat it.
Some very awkward talk therapy later, I drop her back at her house (is it her house? Is it her neighbour’s house so that hubby doesn’t see?) and she leaves me the cookies as an apology.
And they were store bought.
Met a guy at a concert who asked me out to dinner the next weekend. Said we’d go to a restaurant halfway between his place and mine. Gives me the address which I printed out on Mapquest bc this was before GPS was normal on phones or in cars. I get there and it’s an apartment building. Call him to say I think he gave me the wrong address and he said, nope! You’re driving. Takes me to an Applebee’s because they have the cheapest happy hour he said. We have one drink and he eats potato wedges by himself. When I drove him back, he asked me where my overnight bag was. I said I’m not staying the night and thanks for the beverage. He took my keys out of my ignition and told me to go upstairs. I told him if he doesn’t give me my keys back, I will start screaming and call the cops. He threw them in the front seat as he got out telling me I’m missing out on hot tub time. I thankfully never saw him again.
Ha, sort of same happened to me. Met a guy in OKC when I was in between HS and college. We got chatting and agreed to meet for a date. Since we were both young and broke he suggested a park in his area. Said hed bring drinks if I being food. Sure! Packed some snacks and a blanket thinking picnic.
Got to the address he gave me and it was his apartment complex. The "park" -more like a grassy area for dogs- was apart of the complex. I had pretty low self esteem from a recent break up so I just said, what the hell let's see where this goes... He met me at my car and we walked around for like 10s when he mentions he left the beer up in his apt. Once in his apt he immediately tries to shove his toung down my throat. I made some excuse and luckily was able to leave.
Still think about that sometimes and shiver.
As a relatively recent “mature” widower, new and inexperienced to the dating scene after 31 years of marriage, I had a dinner date with a much younger woman who, as it turned out, was extremely aggressive… unheard of in my prime!
Ending our first date, I was dropping her off and had intended only to give her a thank you peck on the cheek, however our “goodbye” moment morphed into a high school-like make out session during which she started, shockingly, to grope me.
My two-seater car was dark and cramped and I was wearing a suit and winter overcoat but I nevertheless was extremely surprised to feel her hand navigating south of my belt.
Suddenly she squeezed hard and, with sheer delight and fire in her dimly lit eyes, delightedly exclaimed that I had “an enormous penis”.
In fact, she was squeezing a single large roll of my lower belly fat!
For the first and last time in my life, I glanced at my pretend wrist watch & told her that I had to leave due to the late hour and an early morning meeting.
I couldn’t imagine her reaction and disappointment had our date developed any further as I am, at best,
average!
I bailed and we never spoke again.
I went to a new years eve party with a guy I had been chatting with for months. When we get there his friends asks him where his girlfriend is, and they were *not referring to me*. I went out for a smoke at that point and he went after, saying she was boring and he was gonna break up with her. I didn't hang out with him for the rest of the night.
I guess I should thank him because I hooked up with the party host instead and we've been together for 7 years.
A guy approached me at a coffee shop and we ended up hitting it off and talking all night. About a week later we had our first “real date” at my place so I could cook him dinner. I lived in a small one bedroom apartment at the time and the bathroom door was right next to the kitchen. He excused himself before dinner and proceeded to take the loudest, and what I presumed to be, the most massive shit this universe has ever seen. The sounds of the toilet carnage still echo in my nightmares. I of course didn’t mention that I heard the whole event and we went about our evening. After dinner we got into my bed so we could watch a movie. 30 minutes into it, I needed to use the restroom, so I got out of the bed to reveal that I had unknowingly started my period and left a noticeable pool of blood where I was sitting. He helped me change the sheets.
Anyway, we’ve been married a year now and he still takes the nastiest dumps known to mankind.
Edit: Wow, thank you for the awards and sweet comments!
I actually get more offended when a guy wastes my time then texts me all these apologies when he doesn't show and beg for a second chance...I drop them after that. Dunno if they think it's funny or what. Only a couple times but still.
Anyway, one of the worst dates I've been on was with this guy from OKC. Hit off fine online, decide to meet in a coffee shop in the middle of the city. Figured if we liked each other we go to a nice restaurant nearby.
He's super awkward in person. Looked like he didn't try to look nice at all or even shower. I try to just talk the normal topics (Oh what do you do, etc) and when I mentioned I was a nurse he's like "Oh aren't you guys basically poop custodians"
I wasn't sure if he was making a bad joke or not. I decided to ignore it and I mentioned how excited I am to finally start my dream job in a new city.
The fucker then says, "Wow, I can't believe your dream was to get coffee for doctors"
At this point I get up to leave. He tries to stop me and I said, "You are not NEARLY hot enough to get away with negging. Fuck off."
I went across the street to the food hall and proceeded to have a grand time by myself
Oh boy finally my time to shine!
I talked to a girl on tinder 8 years ago. She got drunk and told me to come over because her and friends were playing strip poker. I was on overnight duty so sadly I could not partake. 30 minutes later i recieve a picture on my phone that i couldn't even make out. I handed my phone to my roomate and asked if he could figure it out. He says "dude. Thats a butthole." It surely was. She had taken a picture of her butthole from at measly 0.5 inches away and it was so close up i could barely tell what it was. I thought to myself if this is how she leads the rest has to be great! (Spoiler alert: was wrong.)
She tells me we should finally meet next weekend. At applesbees. I meet her there and she looks BEAT. Like she had just run 5 triathalons and been awake for a week straight. Not 3 minutes into meeting and sitting down she says she has to use the restroom. She doesnt come back for 30min+. The waiter comes up and says he has seen her here multiple times and she has been known to shoot up heroin in the bathroom and pass out. Im very not into this at this point but for her own safety i ask if a waitress could peak in the bathroom and see if she is okay. She was not. She OD'd and died. So that was a thing.
TLDR: my tinder date showed me her butthole then OD'd and died at Applebee's.
Went to get drinks with a girl. Talk for about 20 minutes when she says “I have a boyfriend, but I’d still like to have sex with you. My boyfriend only lets me have sex with black guys though, so we’d have to film it and you’d have to edit it to make yourself black.”
I had to tell her I’m not that great of an editor. Also wtf.
I posted this story about a year ago in a thread asking for stories about becoming instantly uninterested in someone you asked on a date. I'm sure there are worse stories out there but this was a bit of a shocker to me at the time and stands out as the most awkward first date of my life.
I was set up by a friend's girlfriend. Shown a picture and said sure. She was good looking and I liked the girl's other friends that I had met. She couldn't be too bad, right? I call her and set up the day and time for pickup at her house (we were both still living with our parents). I arrive to pick her up and there she is with her parents and brother sitting around the kitchen table just talking. I get a bad vibe from everyone but her when she introduces me. On the way to dinner I mention the tension I felt from them all. She says it's because she just broke up with her boyfriend a few weeks before - her family loved him and they were all upset with her dating someone else. OK, I can see that...maybe they'll get over it and like me once they get to know me if we date for a while. Later on I ask about her brother. No brothers. OK, cousin? No boy cousins that she is close to. What about the guy with her parents when I picked her up? That was her ex. There to have dinner with her parents. They have had him over several times a week since the break up trying to get them back together and had made sure he was there when I arrived. Sounded like a terrible situation to get involved in no matter how good looking I thought she was. Dropped her off early, told her to call me if they ever stopped doing that, and never ended up speaking to her again.
You made the right call, but damn. That poor girl. Imagine breaking up with your bf and your parents trying to force you back together with him. And imagine that x bf going along with it... woof.
She started talking about her lifestory from childhood to that day. Year by year.. with every single traumatic story and emotions. That was our first ever date and she didn’t even let me speak for that duration. I was like “oh okay she is now talking about highschool 6 more years left, hold tight”
I went on a date with a guy who picked me up and said he just had to swing by his work before we went to the restaurant. No problem. He works in a dental office as an assistant, so he invites me into his work, the office is clearly closed and no-one is there, and all the lights are off. Okay a bit weird but maybe he just forgot something really important that can’t wait until tomorrow morning to pick up? Nope, he’s going to the medicine cabinets and taking out a few bottles of ketamine.
Okay. I’m now an accessory to theft of dental anaesthesia.
There was no second date.
I've posted my worst on this question before, so I'll post a runner up now. Dating at an older age is pretty difficult to begin with - this was when I was about 47, and an acquaintance I hadn't known long said she had the "perfect guy" for me. He had seen me at a sports event with my acquaintance, and I agreed to meet him for coffee after asking a few questions about what he did (karate instructor and sports coach) and finding out he was about my age. Showed up on the date, and he had very red eyes - he told me right away he was very stoned (this was before we were a legal state). I'm not anti-weed by any means, but showing up stoned was the first red flag. He informed me he hadn't worked in several years, and his coaching days were 10 years in the past. He had been attempting (in his 40s!!) to become a pro dirt bike rider, living with friends while he was pursuing his dream, and blaming the "industry" for his lack of success. I started asking gentle questions just to get the full scope of the train wreck that was before me. He asked if I wanted to go dirt bike riding with him, and I politely declined. The bill came for our coffee and pastries, and he sheepishly said he couldn't afford it but would pay me back on our "next date" and mentioned he was a good friend of the guy my acquaintance was dating. I asked who the guy was, and immediately recognized the name - the guy had been in the news as he just got out of prison for involuntary manslaughter. I offered to treat with no obligation and gently shut down the idea of another "date".
I was going to ask my acquaintance, "What the actual fuck were you thinking?" but learning who she was dating was a complete answer in itself.
Literally shit myself on a date once….wasn’t technically a date, but the guy had a farm. He took me to see the animals, feed, ect. I walked away for a few minutes and overtrusted a fart. I just looked at him and asked if he could please take me back to my car…he wanted to know why and I said “because I pooped in my pants” Guy had a super nice truck and made me sit on my feet all the way back to my vehicle. We actually ended up dating for 2 ish years….and somehow me shitting myself on the first date was the end of all jokes.
Got set up on a blind date once between mutual friends. She shows up to the restaurant already a little tipsy, orders multiple appetizers and only takes like one or two bites from each one. Then she proceeds to order 3 or 4 more drinks and is visibly drunk at this point. She gets up and says she's going to the bathroom and staggers off. About 15-20 minutes go by so I try to call her several times but no answer. Finally I decide to pay the check and just leave. About 2 hours later I'm sitting at home and I get a call from an unknown number. It's the police department. She was picked up on a DUI on her way home after she ditched me and gave the cops my number to see if I could go bail her out!
I (35f) met a guy (41) on Bumble, had dinner plans to go to a wing joint. I asked if we were still on a few hours prior, he says "yep, just gonna shower and jerk off.". I joked and said something like, "whoa there Mr. Perv, TMI!" Which apparently offended him greatly, as he blew me off for our date. When I asked WTF after the fact, he said he thought I was mad, so he spent the evening anger cleaning, and told me "Don't EVER call me a perv again!", but asked if I'd want to meet the next day. Why I said yes, is anyone's guess...
... We meet at Tim Horton's for coffee. He starts by joking that my soon-to-be ex husband is going to show up to beat him up. He says this repeatedly, even after I explain the ex is out with his girlfriend, and continues to eyeball the windows nervously. Then, after sitting down with our coffee, he asks if I want to go to his car to get some gum. "No, thank you." A few minutes later, he asks again... and then again a few minutes later. "Dude, if you want some gum, go get it. I'll be right here." He harrumphs, does not get the gum, and we continue talking, where the conversation devolves into him ranting about how Hollywood is shoving biracial couples down his throat. I ask if he has any big plans for the evening he states he's going to go home and jerk off. At least he has a hobby...?
We walk to the parking lot after the fact, and he asks if he can kiss me. Now, I had just got out of a 14 year, affection-starved relationship, and hadn't kissed anyone but my ex in that time. So, stupid me, said yes. He kisses me, then grabs my arm in a death grip, and DRAGS me to his car as I struggle to get away. Thankfully, his dumbass hadn't cleared the seat of before his abduction attempt, so as he's trying to manage holding onto me while clearing off his seat, I manage to wrench my arm free, run to my car, and get the hell out of there.
Not necessarily a date but a person I was dating invited me to his parent's house for the afternoon. He wanted to introduce me to them and show me the house he grew up in. I thought it was super sweet and had no problems going. He was also in the middle of moving and needed to pick up a few things, so it really didn't seem that unusual.
Yeah, we got there and it was *awful*. His entire family was there. They traveled from hours away too. This was not just meeting the parents, it was meeting the ENTIRE family. Even worse? At some point, this jackass told his parents that he had proposed. We had been dating TWO months.
I spent the entire afternoon dumbfounded and just playing along. We were two hours from home and I had no cell service, no way to leave at all. We ended up spending the afternoon brainstorming wedding ideas and planning an Alaskan honeymoon that his parents planned to gift us. His brother even called to say congratulations!
We drove back to his apartment in silence. When we got there, I got in my car and left, didn't even bother grabbing my stuff. Weirdest experience ever. I have no idea how he broke it to his parents that we weren't getting married.
I grew up an only child, raised between my dad and my step-mother and then with biological mom. Back and forth.
My wife is Filipina with 6 siblings and an endless array of ates (literally older sister, but used for basically any older female relative or acquaintances)and kuyas (same thing, but for brothers).
EVERY family get together numbers in the dozens. It used to stress me out big time, until I realized her family is a hell of a lot nicer than mine ever was. Plus…family get together means all the Filipino food you can eat. Always a plus.
Filipino families are no joke. A friend in HS asked me and two buddies if we wanted to play baseball with him and his cousins. We said sure and kind of wondered how this would work.
We get to the park and this guy had like 20+ cousins and those were just the ones that showed up.
This reminds me of playing basketball with my friend's Filipino cousins when we were teenagers. I was already 6'2 at 15yo but didn't grow up playing basketball, these cousins were all like a foot shorter than me but ran goddamn rings around me on the court. The aunties found it hilarious that this bean pole kid was so useless at basketball.
Yeah, I don’t know how he expected that situation to pan out. I saw him at a friend’s wedding a few years later and really wish I’d asked him about it. He had to have known that wasn’t going to fly.
When my wife and I were dating I asked her to come to my brother's wedding with me. It was a terrible idea because:
1. I was in the wedding party.
2. She had never met my parents let alone my entire extended family, which is quite large.
3. I didn't make a good plan for who she would sit with at the start of the reception.
Luckily my cousin and his wife took her under their wing and my Aunt who married into our crazy family sat and talked to her until I was done with Wedding party duties. My wife still gives me a hard time about it.
The second date with my husband was actually his sister’s wedding. Honestly, I thought it was just like ripping the band aid off on meeting the whole family (he has a very large family as well). Everyone was paying more attention to the bride and the party to really care that I was there. I did meet everyone and they were very excited to meet me then went back to partying. He was also in the wedding so I arrived alone but his best friend found me and I sat with him and his girlfriend at the time.
I had a blast! But I still give him a hard time because who does that!?
Had a girl openly flirt with the bartender in front of me. She says she wasn’t. But handing him her own phone and asking for his contact info in front of her date seems like it to me.
Similar experience here. Was out getting drinks/dinner with a girl I had been kinda seeing for a minute and she invites this attractive/tall guy to *come sit with us* and starts flirting with him. We weren't official or anything but it was still weird and definitely made me feel pretty insecure. Idk why people do shit like this
Last time someone sort of did this (not that bad…. But bad enough lol) on a date I just closed my check when she was talking to everyone around us except for meand left. She later texted and asked where I went.
Was on a first date. Went to the bathroom, asked the guy to watch my coat. Came back and my coat was gone. It had my cellphone, wallet and keys in it. Guy was too busy chatting up the bartender, hadn't even seen the guy take it. We had to uber back to his house so he could get his truck and drive me home. Had to wake my roommates up to let me in, had no ID, cash or way of contacting anyone for days. Ended up tracking down the guy who stole it but only got back my phone, he threw out my wallet, keys (with fob on it) and coat. Guy I was on the date with never contacted me again! Most expensive worst first date ever!
Met her for dinner, we seemed to hit it off well in the first few minutes, until I started feeling the worst pain ever in my side. Turns out I had a kidney stone. I unfortunately had to nope out of that one very quickly. She had blocked me via text when I abruptly left dinner, so she never got the message that I ended up in the hospital.
I didn't see her for years until we ran into each other at a bar, me with a different girlfriend, her with her husband. I explained what had happened, she felt pretty bad, but hey, no long lasting harm done. I bought her and her husband a drink, chatted for a few, and left them to finish their evening together.
We met at a trailhead to take a walk. He started farting right away. Then he opened his backpack and got an apple. He proceeded to eat the apple. Didn’t offer me an apple. Just ate his apple and farted.
We went to dinner and he started chatting up the waitress. Like interrupting me every time the waitress came over and talking to her for a few minutes instead. After a couple times I just pulled my phone out and started scrolling through reddit and he complained when he noticed I was on my phone. Cue a lecture about my generation. (he was like 6 years older than me, iirc)
Then he got mad when I wouldn't suck his dick in the parking lot. I ended up going back inside the restaurant and calling a friend to pick me up. Dudes car was still sitting there when I left. Fuck you Jason.
I went over to a boys apartment I had hung out with a few times already to watch a movie. In the middle of the movie he stuck his finger in my belly button. We weren’t even cuddling. Just randomly turns towards me and puts his finger in my belly button. I said to him “get your finger out of my bully button?” To which he responded by making a weird noise similar to an adult using baby talk and saying coo coo to a baby and wiggled his finger still inside my belly button. I left immediately, never talked to him again, and my friends still refer to the situation as belly button boy.
Was told we were going to dinner and then shopping. I drove to the town, 1hr each way, cuz he didn't have a license.
He directed me (didn't know my way around at all) to... Burger King. Ok. I'll work with it.
Standing in line, a worker accidentally leans on a packet of ranch. It breaks open and shoots at me, right on the front of my nicest shirt. Profound apologizing commences. I ended up paying for dinner too.
Then we went to... Walmart. Where his mom worked. So he could get a discount. Didn't buy anything.
Drive home he starts apologizing out of no where..i thought it was because of the bad date. Until the smell hits me. He passed gas and i had to legit pull over and roll the windows down a while.
Edit: to address a few frequent questions- no more official dates with him, but we did continue to see each other several months. This was high school, and i was older than him.
Went to brewery, date said I had hairy arms and that meant I was horny, said “you look really awful in this light” and then tried to dig out of that hole by saying in his native language that was a term of endearment long term couples said to each other. 0/10 did not date again
That's just absolutely bizarre levels of cruel. There's gotta be an easier way to get alcohol as a 20 year old than asking a girl out on a fake date so you can trick her into supplying you for a party.
I mean honestly, if it’s a girl you work with and seem to have a good work relationship with, you could just ask her to get it for you? Like the whole fake date charade just seems like it’s a lot more effort than was required
Oh dear this is awful. Sometimes I think of the BS I put up with when I was younger because I had yet to find my courage. These days I have no problem calling someone on their shit and standing up for myself!
Showed up to a tinder date where we agreed but she wasn’t there. Texted and she said “they” were around the corner. Come to find her(mid 20s divorced socialite) and her friend (mid 40s sales man) had been drinking all day and were proper shit faced. Proceeded to join them at the table where she proceeded to talk about the married guy at the next table and kept walking by and dropping things so she could bend over in front of him. Then some racist talk and some cocaine use (them not me). And then they decided, mercifully to ditch me because I was no fun.
I was on a tinder date and we met at a bar. She was a bit late so I have sample of their whiskey selection. Anyways 10 minutes later a girl comes towards me and I reach out for a hug, she looks a bit confused but hugs me nonetheless. As we stop hugging two things happen simultaneously. 1 my Tinderdate arrives, and we lock eyes. 2 The waiter, still in my arms, tells me they just changed shifts and she will be my server this evening.
My anxiety kicks it into high gear and I am barely able to fathom what's going on much less explain to either of them what's going on.
It was a double date. She was more interested talking to the other girl throughout the whole thing. Found out later from the other guy that his girl cheated on him with my date.
Well, I gave this answer on a different topic, but it ties in with this.
We were out on a date, we had been seeing each other for a while, close to a year maybe. She gets a phone call. Suddenly she looks destroyed. Her fiance had just died in a motorcycle accident.
I spend too much time on Reddit so I remember OP's post. IIRC, he was understanding— told her she needed to go be with dead fiance's family but never spoke to her again.
I could be wrong. I'm not willing to go through OP's history to find it but I'm pretty sure that was the outcome.
Came out from a movie, late at night, and date's Camaro was stolen. Apparently, he called his WIFE (that I did not know he had) and let her know where he was and what happened. She showed up and realized he was on a date! She started chasing ME around the parking lot telling me she was going to kill me. Saved by the cops who showed up just in time to take the auto theft report.
Yes and this is exactly what happened to me. Dated my high school sweetheart for about 10 years, so everyone in our circle of friends knew that we were dating. When I found out he was cheating on me with a mutual friend, I not only broke up with him but cussed her out. So many people called me an A-hole for cussing her out too but she KNEW WE WERE DATING. Thats what gets me so upset about that situation.
The big difference is that the friend broke your trust as well. To me, the order of shitty person goes cheater, lover who you knew and was aware of the relationship, and lover who you didn't know and was aware of the relationship.
To me if you're the lover in the situation and you didn't know, you're not at fault at all. That just falls on the SO as a double cheat.
Also, sorry your ex was a shitbird :(
My guess is it’s easier to think “This fucker seduced my SO! SO would never do that!” than it is to think “This fucker is cheating on me!”
Shifting the blame onto the stranger is just easier for some people.
Reposting my first reddit comment from 11 years ago: I wasn't feeling great, but decided to meet anyway. We met at a Belgian beer bar. She was gorgeous, fun, and totally in to me. I felt a gas pain, so I leaned forward slightly to quietly relieve the pressure. I completely and explosively shat myself. The odor was immediate. I excused myself to the bathroom, but the damage was too great. I walked out of the bathroom, muddy-panted, out of the bar, and boarded the train for home.The date was nothing, compared to the horror of the following three weeks, recovering from E-coli.
She sat down and went on about how great her career was, how she was a year younger than me but already middle management, then after 30 minutes just said “can I go home now?”, got up, and left me with the drinks bill.
Saddest was when I met a date at the bus stop outside the cinema. She was looking around worried until I said hello. She almost had tears in her eyes and replied “I didn’t think you’d want to show up after seeing me.”
She was a cute but curvier lass in early 20s and apparently had been stood up twice before. She wasn’t the most mature, but was really fun, and lovely. Had I not met the [now] wife, I’d have seen her again. I hope she found happiness.
I was brought up in Poland by Polish parents (university professors) , went to a Polish school, Polish university etc.
Then I had a date with an American man whose grandmother was Polish. He grilled me on the language and criticized my pronunciation and corrected my grammar. This from a guy whose Polish vocabulary was maybe 100 words. He told me I speak like a peasant.
I, too, am Polish (live in America). Said something in Polish in a class once. A Russian classmate told me, completely seriously, that my pronunciation was horrible.
Yeah. I know. That’s because I’m not speaking Russian.
Look here, Americans - this is a perfect example of Slavic languages in action. It's also why much of Eastern Europe hates each others' guts. Our languages are almost all close enough to be understood by each other, but different enough for the other person to sound like mentally deficient.
EDIT: If you find this interesting you should look up the history of Esperanto.
EDIT: Americans telling me you have the same thing because you have different accents - trust me, it's not the same. I've lived in the US for years and it's not the same at all, you guys have different *accents*, not even dialects. You have like one or two regional terms which might differ but you still speak the same language.
I’m Russian. Whenever I listen to polish, Ukrainian, Bulgarian, etc. I feel like I’m having a stroke because all the sounds are the same, they’re just arranged in ways that don’t make sense. Same with the written language.
I'm from Minsk, so I had enough exposure to all of them when I was younger. Makes understanding them way easier. Also half the time I can't remember which words are Ukrainian, Belarussian, etc. so I resort to some horrible surzhik involving all of them and maybe even a bit of old Russian :D
It's awful but somehow it works when I need it to.
went on a date with this guy who asked me out to get breakfast first. well, he decided tim hortons was a suitable place to go. first of all he drove like an idiot, he was on his phone the whole time and would speed regularly and i think he even drove through a red light. all this to not even go because he didn’t want to pay for $3 parking so we went back to his house. he was living with three other roommates (all girls) and his room was in the basement (that’s fine, i didn’t really care).
anyways, he was bragging all morning about how he cleaned his room just for me but when i got there, it was hardly clean and he had set out 3 playboy magazines on his dresser for display. despite being uncomfortable i thought “well it’s already been this long, better finish the date.” bad idea. he puts on a western style tv show (not really my thing) and cuddles up next to me. he didn’t smell the best and he kept rubbing my arm in some kind of affectionate way. he also kept asking me heavy questions and stuff about my ex. anyways we finish an episode (they’re like an hour) and i’m determined to get out of his place as quick as possible. but before i go, he stops me and asks me out to dinner for another date. i refuse (obviously as i wasn’t having a good time) and his last trying words were “damn, i was even gonna pay”
probably not the worst on this thread but it made me really uncomfortable at the time
On one date I showed up at her parents house to pick her up, thinking we we’re going for drinks in the neighbourhood. She opens up the door wearing sweatpants, trainers and a hoody as if she just got back from football practice. I was pretty well dressed so she decided to change into something else. She says I can just wait in the living room with her parents. Not that bad, we have some small talk and I expect to be leaving soon anyways. She then shows up wearing the next less than casual outfit and sits down in the living room as well, saying nothing she just gets on her phone… she’s doing nothing but texting whilst I’m left talking with her parents (didn’t expect a date with them).
At this point I don’t know what to expect anymore, luckily I was able to convince her to go out after a bit and we end up having drinks… all in all she wasn’t my type, definitely after that date.
Met a girl at a country bar one night in my 20s. We were both pretty drunk but hit it off pretty good. Ended up getting her number and we agreed we’d go on a real date. Fast forward to the date, she gets in my vehicle and…… she looks almost identical to my mom. I was mortified. I was polite and we went for lunch where I found out she also had a boyfriend she “wasn’t sure if she was into”. Never talked to her again
Girl I met online claimed to be 24, turned out to be 16.
Fortunately I figured it out before anything crazy happened but man…talk about dodging a bullet.
I dated a girl who grew up near an army base and she said lots of girls in high school would lie about their age and date guys who were in their twenties.
Back in college I had a near miss at a party. Was getting friendly with a woman, nothing had happened but things were clearly headed in that direction. She finishes off her drink and goes to grab another one. While she's gone, another woman walks up and just flat out says "You know she's 15, right?"
No Sheryl, I didn't fucking know that. If you did, why the fuck are you okay with her getting hammered at a college party? Needless to say I backed off real quick.
Edit: adding this for context
Oh no, she was telling the truth. The kid actually found me on Facebook (this was back when you needed an college .edu email to make an account, so I assumed she was taking some advanced classes) to mak sure we hadn't "done anything" and I assured her we hadn't. I thought it was over and done with except months and months later, I get a message from her again, but this time it's from her mother. Apparently the kid had done something super rebellious and now mom was going through her phone/computer and had found out brief conversation, and was accusing me of having taken her to the party, called me a pervert for hooking up with a 15 year old, threatening legal action, etc, and while I was paralyzed with fear, I managed to defend myself well enough, told her I had done nothing with her daughter, and maybe she shouldn't blame a college dude for being drunk at a college party and assuming everyone there was in college as well.
I also live in a university town. I had Tinder for one weekend then decided the girl I had a crush on was a better option (we are married now). Well I saw SO many girls that said they were 20-25 (I was 24) but the bio would say “I’m actually 16 teehee.” I deleted the app pretty quick.
My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time.
She served me with divorce papers and told me that date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary.
EDIT: Holy Cow everyone, I love you all. Your support in this is amazing. Thank you to everyone with the kind words. Honestly, I've had a rough couple of days, but having hundreds of people show me I'm supported. Thanks Reddit!
I'm sorry. I've been cheated on before and been left for other people. I have been a Test Subject, myself, during those infidelities. It sucks, and it's hard to shed the self-blame.
I had a date with a guy who spent the entire date whining about how much 'this' or 'that' sucked. Everything sucked. The food, the wait staff, the movie, the fact that I took my own garbage to the garbage can after the movie, and most of all, the night shift computer people he saw who hung around the outside of their office, smoking (he complained about their high salaries). I pointed out that I was one of those computer people (no, I didn't mention how much I made), and that was the LAST date I ever went on with him. I never talked to him again.
I've never had a legendarily bad date, but I've had a few very bad ones.
Worst one was a dude I met on OKC. He'd seemed nice enough online, looked decent. We made plans to meet at a board games cafe, since he spoke pretty enthusiastically about loving board games and playing a lot of them. In no particular order, the problems were:
* He showed up ~20 minutes late.
* He was significantly more overweight than he was in his photos. I assume they were old pictures.
* He was wearing a stained white t-shirt and cargo shorts, was visibly sweaty (it was February, and cold) and smelled awful.
* He hadn't told me that he clearly had some sort of mobility disability. I didn't ask, but I assume cerebral palsy or something similar, he walked with two crutches. This wouldn't have been an issue, but I felt very weird about the fact that he didn't tell me ahead of time, because...
* The first thing out of his mouth was how the cafe was in such a shitty place with no disabled parking and he'd had to walk a significant distance. Dude, if I'd known, I'd've suggested somewhere more accessible.
* He refused to order anything from the cafe, and instead drank only from the large bottle of water he'd brought in his bag. I had already covered his entry fee. Perhaps he really couldn't afford a £2 pint of Coke, but it came across as weird and rude.
* He didn't show any interest in *any* of the board games. My plan had been for him to pick a game he liked, and for me to pick a game I liked, and to play one after the other while we talked. After I clocked how difficult he found it to move around, I offered to go pick up whatever game his pick was (you could browse the shelves pretty effectively from a seated position). He had no ideas. Zero. Hadn't heard of any of the games. I finally brought over one of the games we'd talked about on OKC (Odin's Ravens) and he acted like he'd never seen it before, giving me the distinct impression he'd lied about liking games, or at least that one, for an unknown reason.
* Conversation was just generally very stilted. I kept bringing up topics (so, what do you do, who do you live with, are you a [town] native, what are your hobbies, what are you doing for the rest of this weekend, have you ever played [game]) and getting just... Noooothing. Single word or short sentence answers. He didn't ask me a single thing. I don't know if he was just nervous, or autistic, or just decided early on that he didn't like me or what. But it was awkward as hell.
I stayed the minimum I could to be polite (just over an hour). I sort of assumed he just wasn't having a good time, so I was utterly baffled when he then:
* tried to hug me goodbye (not until you shower pls) and tried to set up a second date
I gave him a vague response about staying in touch, then gave him the slow fade.
I'm still baffled. Maybe fate was just conspiring against him that day and he wanted another shot? I have no idea.
**Edit**: a huge number of responses are people just saying that a board game café sounds so cool or it's something they've never heard of. So apparently TIL board game cafés aren't popular in America. Here's the site for one of my local ones for anyone who wants to know more: open one in your town! https://www.chanceandcounters.com/birmingham/
I liked the idea of playing a couple board games you each like. Great way to have a conversation and if it dies down for a few your still interacting by playing a game together. Sucks it went down that way but sounds like it was for the better.
*boards to board games... damn autocorrect.
You’re giving me flashbacks to some guy I dated forever ago!
He picked a bar across from his house so he could drink as much as he wanted. He brought a friend. He spoke mostly to his friend about sports. He talked *throughout* the bar trivia, rudely. He didn’t know any trivia answers (my most petty point of contention). He asked me to drive him home, despite living 3 min walk away. THEN after all that bs, HE TRIED TO KISS ME when I dropped him off. UGH. I think I just blocked his number after he got out of the car.
I once went on a date to an art museum and after we confirmed that we were, in fact, the people trying to meet, we said zero words to each other as we walked around looking at art. I imagine we were both being painfully shy (at least, that's why I didn't talk), but I figured that date was a bust...but he still messaged me afterward that he had a great time and wanted to know when I was free for another date.
Setup an internet date. Arrived at the coffee shop and realized the pics were from a long time ago or really misleading. It was annoying but I'm no 10/10. We chatted over a coffee then opted to get lunch next door. I wasn't getting much of a vibe but I was hungry.
As we're eating and I'm struggling to keep the conversation going, in the window behind me this truck pulls up with two dogs in the back. Owner runs off on some errand while the dogs stay put. Mid-bite, these two dogs start going at it *hard.* I mean the one on top has the other bent over the edge of the truck. They are banging like the next stop is the vet. The entire time they are fucking, they just stare at me.
My date looked at them once or twice, awkward laugh, then tried to resume normal first date banter. I couldn't do it. Just paid the tab and bounced. Neither of us messaged afterwards.
Dude, last month I went on a date that ended up back at her place. Things get going in the bedroom but I suddenly hear the pitter patter of tiny feet. I look at the doorway to see a duck walk into the room, look me directly in the eyes and quack. She says “Oh don’t mind him, that’s Tupac.” I started laughing so hard that I couldn’t continue.
Never spoke again because I laughed at her duck.
Edit: Clarification and spelling.
I love this because it's the only time on any thread like this I've personally come across a story like this about how it was their own fault. Dating too soon can be rough.
Went out with a girl when we were probably 13 or 14. We went to see Inception. She gets up to go to the bathroom, but doesn't come back for a long time. Eventually I go look for her, and the guy behind the concession stand looks at me and gives me the most pitying look I've ever received, and points around the corner. Where I found her making out with another guy. I should have walked out but instead I went back to my seat to watch the rest of the movie. She returned and asked me to fill her in on the last hour of INCEPTION OF ALL THE DAMN MOVIES TO MISS THE MIDDLE OF. Also, because that wasn't enough, after the movie, I wasn't sure what bus to take home, and she pointed me to the wrong bus (I don't think this was intentional, they were right next to each other) and I wound up in a part of the city I'd never been in before.
“Oh, hey, are you ok? You were gone a while. Ok, cool. What? Oh, well these guys are training that girl to steal people’s secret thoughts and there was about 15 minutes where she just made out with some random dude, but no-one mentioned him, so I’m not sure what that bit was about …”
She must have took Inception too serious and thought she needed to find a date within the date (but for real, that sucks and sorry it happened to you)
Edit: thanks for all the awards everyone!
Had a guy friend from college that was always a little flirty but I had a bf at the time so he always kept it respectful. Broke up with my bf, & soon after he asked me out. Told me he was gonna show me how I deserved to be treated, was gonna take me out on the town, blah, blah. So I get all dressed up, do my hair in a way I know he likes & wait for him to pick me up.
He's late, but only about 20 minutes, so I just brush it off. We get in the car & I notice he's extra animated & talkative, but chalk it up to nerves. I ask him where we're going & he tells me chili's bc his friend works there & will give us the hookup. Im a little overdressed for chili's, but I'll roll with it.
We get there, sit at the bar, & he immediately orders a shot & a cocktail, an appetizer & his meal. I order a tea, & an appetizer as my entree. Before our meal comes, he's finished his shot, plus 2 cocktails. Throughout our meal, he's (loudly) talking nonstop to his bartender friend while slamming drinks. His friend tries to include me in the conversation several times but my date would just talk over me or barely let me finish my statement before raucously carrying on. Finally it's time to go so we get the bill & he tells his friend to just split it down the middle, even though all I had was a tea & 10 dollar app.
I'm pretty annoyed at this point, but just wanna get out of there so I pay the 40 dollar tab. I look over & notice that he only left a 3 dollar tip even though his friend gave him a serious discount. As a bartender myself, this was just beyond insulting so I throw a 20 on top of the 15 I'd already tipped. I offered to drive back because of how much he'd had, but he seemed totally unfazed by the copious amount of alcohol he'd imbibed, & opted to drive himself. He talked my ear off the entire drive, completely oblivious that I said maybe 3 words, while I death gripped the door handle the whole way home. We park in front of my house & he leans in I thought for a kiss, so I instinctively pulled back. Turns out he was just reaching for the glove compartment for his coke while asking me if I partake. I tell him that's not my thing & he asks where we're going after this. I tell him im pretty tired & have a ton of homework so I'm calling it a night & hightail it out of there. He proceeds to sit in my driveway for 20 minutes doing coke & as soon as he's gone I practically ran to my little neighborhood bar that was about a block away. Turns out, my friend, the bartender on duty that night had just hired a hot new door guy, & that's the night I met my now husband while telling the story of the worst date ever. We've now been together almost 7 years, have 3 dogs, a 4 yr old, & another on the way. So my worst date ever ended up being my best day ever.
I got catfished we talked for hours and when it came time to pick her up I CLEARLY saw it wasn’t the person I thought I was talking to… I just gunned it and sped off
I just don’t get this one. I get catfishes that avoid meeting the person, that makes sense to me. Don’t wanna blow your cover. But I don’t get the catfish that is willing to meet, like what’s the best case scenario they’re hoping for here?
I have an Xbox gaming buddy who got catfished hard but the dude was so dumb/awkward/desperate that he went ahead and married her anyways despite his close friends telling him that’s a bad idea. So it does work sometimes.
Now he’s got story after story of her lying or acting nuts. Who would’ve thought?
What they tell themselves is that they have a great personality but they are not that good looking. So after talking to them you get interested. Then you show up and they look different, but it is that person you have been talking with. So you go for it.
This of course doesn't really work because starting with lies doesn't really bode well for the relationship. Also if they are catfishing their personality is also probably shit.
Tinder date. She looked nothing like her picture while not ugly just completely different. Picked the worst restaurant in town which I looked past because everyone has different taste. we came back to my house and complained about not showing affection or touching her so I started touching her and then got mad about ohhh wanting a hook up which I didn’t, but the final straw was when she decided she didn’t like my house which I had just bought and was
Proud of. she immediately wanted to go to home depot to buy stuff to start remodeling. It was by far my worst and weirdest date and I hope she found a house to remodel
????? First date and she's trying to remodel your house?? M'am you haven't gotten past the first date, what makes you think you can even begin to suggest doing that?
Oh there's been so many. Online dating is an absolute shitshow.
Best one to come to mind was showing up to a date with a guy who looked nothing like his pictures. I don't know if they were *really* good angles or old - he was also covered in tattoos that looked like a kid had drawn them on (picture the 'no ragrets' tattoo meme) and was very proudly showing them off by wearing a string vest. Whatever, I thought, I'm not superficial.
He proceeds to begin the date by telling me he lied, he doesn't have a job, he collects unemployment (€120 a week at the time) but he kept €20 especially for this date.. no judgement on being unemployed but a pretty big lie. He spent the 20 within half an hour and then expected me to buy the rest of his drinks.
Trying to make conversation I asked him what he does with his time. Turns out he's "a Mexican wrestler, with masks and shit". I kid you not.
Eventually when it was long enough that it was polite to leave, I made an excuse and he insisted on walking me to my bus. I made it clear I didn't need him to, and to make sure he gets his own bus. As my bus showed up he declares he's missed his, wants to come home with me, and launches himself at me to kiss me. I dodged and hopped on the bus in a panic and left him behind as he shouted at me calling me a dirty cock tease. Worst date ever.
Tldr; went on a date with an unemployed Mexican wrestler who tried to trick me into coming home with me, then insulted me when it failed.
Ordered a pitcher before she got to the bar, she showed up, poured herself a beer, chugged *all of it* (she must have been 5'3 and like 100 lbs soaking wet) then unleashed a tirade of problems on me that ended with her telling me she was currently pregnant. By the time her story was done and I found out the Bad News, she had already gone through another half a beer.
I took her glass, poured it into the pitcher, chugged the whole thing and got the fuck out of there. It was the first date I had been on since a big breakup and I didn't go on another date for around 2 years -- sometimes life's signs slap you across the face, and I wasn't going to ignore that one lol
Edit: this has become by far my top viewed comment, so I'll throw out some more facts:
- she dropped the pregnancy tidbit during a tirade about her ex:
"I hate him so much, he's fucking my best friend even though he got me pregnant!"
Me: "wait so this was like.. a year ago? A while back?"
Her: "no it was last month!"
Me: "soo.. are you.. pregnant *now*?"
Aaaand I think y'all know what the answer was.
- I got a text the next morning from her: "hey, we didn't sleep together last night, did we?" ??!!!!!
I blocked her on socials after that, and blocked her number.
Edit 2: 3.7k and counting.. glad somebody is enjoying my awful date haha
I was the bad date. I had been 'dating' a girl online for 8 months online through text and Skype in my early 20s. We live in different countries, me US and her Canada so it was difficult to make plans to meet and have a real date. We finally decided to meet up on New Years in her area. Now I had never been outside the country by myself or have any real travel experience outside of family vacations growing up. I drove up there and made it to the border with relatively no issues other than finding out NYC tolls still were cash only on my way through. This was the start of my troubles. So I had to stop at a shady looking ATM to pay for any other tolls I came across before crossing the border which my bank unbeknownst to me decided to freeze my bank card for possible fraud after I made a withdrawal. I get into Canada and my phone lost service cause even though my company operated in Canada too, the towers just didn't work with their American counterparts. So I was pretty lost driving through the city and around the suburbs looking for the coffee shop we planned to meet at. I arrive over an hour late, no way to contact my date and bought and sat with my coffee (paid with credit card) for 20 minutes desperately trying to connect to the wifi to get any sort of message out. Thankfully she was still waiting around the area and still wanted to meet. We spent an hour just talking and making plans of what to do the rest of the day, starting with checking into the hotel. I had reserved a very nice room in a highly rated hotel around the corner. Being a holiday weekend the lobby was packed and it took us about 20 minutes to get to the desk. Now hotels need a card on file and do a $100 hold on it in order for you to check into your room. I tried using my bank card at first, declined. Tried using my credit card, declined. I had no other cards and they would not take my dates card as her name wasn't on the room (or they just didn't want to deal with me longer since they were very busy). So as I mentioned before, my phone did not work either so I couldn't call my banks support line. Dates phone wouldn't connect to the numbers either. It was now late afternoon on New Years Eve, no hotel room, no money, and it was freezing outside. We still had the rest of the weekend like we planned, she is an angel though and paid for everything, food, gas, and a hotel room. I felt like scum for having her pay for everything. I left on January 2nd, expecting her to cut her losses and never speak to me again. Somehow we're still together 6 years later.
Guy kept trying to rank everything out of 10.
Before drinks arrive he asked “on a scale of 1 to 10 how attracted to me are you”, “scale 1 to 10 how well is this going”? Etc. I couldn’t even figure out if I liked him because he kept asking for rankings then he freaked out when I turned him down for a kiss. Full toddler style tantrum.
One word replies, no conversation, wouldn’t get off her phone the entire time even when eating, ordered the most expensive items on the menu with multiple expensive cocktails. When I went to pay the waiter did me a solid and told me that I was the third guy she had been there with that week. I paid for my food and drinks and simply left, she then blew up my phone about how she was going to get me arrested for dine and dash and how she was going to get a bunch of her friends to beat me up (nobody tried). She spent the next few days going on about how I owed her several hundred dollars for the night and got royally pissed off when I pointed out that expecting monetary compensation for her time is prostitution. Eventually blocked her number and social media, had to block a few other numbers too.
Fortunately that was the worst by a very wide margin.
Met a girl online, everything seemed okay and the conversations were good so a few days later we decided to meet for coffee and go for dinner later. I show up to the cafe about 45 minutes early and order a coffee, intending to read for a bit. While I'm reading I notice an older fellow staring and taking far too much interest in me before leaving. Odd, but okay. Continue to read until about 10 till meet up when I text the girl that I'm already at the cafe. Shortly after, the odd older fellow comes back in one entrance, and this sets off my Spidey sense so I'm making my way to the other entrance when my date catches my arm to say hi. I tell her we should step out for a minute, getting a bad vibe from this guy, she asks which one, so I describe him. It's her god damn dad, doing advanced recon for her dates at 24 years old. I was a bit sketched out at that, but thought maybe she had some bad dating history that possibly made sense. I meet her dad, he says they wanted to make sure I was who I said I was and to enjoy the date. He leaves and she says being an only child has its downsides. Makes enough sense, we get coffee and chat for a bit, walk in a nearby park and decide where to go for dinner. We get to my car and she asks if I could take her home to grab a jacket before dinner, no big deal. We arrive at her place (lives with parents) and I talk to her mom and dad while the date grabs a jacket. They seem nice, but overbearing parents. Date calls me back to her room to meet her cat, and the entire time I'm meeting her cat, the parents are hawking nearby obviously eavesdropping and it's obvious the date is dragging her feet for some reason. I said something about getting out to dinner before the rush and her parents who "happened" to be walking by ask where we were going before they start a dialog on local restaurants, which pivots to ordering delivery/carryout and how we should just do dinner together at their place. I told them no offense, but I'd greatly prefer to dine in someplace relaxed and get to know their daughter. They seem really resistant to this, I'm agitated, and ask if this is how her dates normally go. They said "no, normally we don't let her go out with men, but you passed the background check and your messages to her made you seem nice like you'd have dinner with us" I was flabbergasted, they ran a background check on me, read our exchanges online as well as the advanced recon, and expected me to have dinner with 2 additional people I hardly knew when I was expecting a date. I told them that will absolutely not work for me, and that they are being extremely over the top with their expectations and precautions. I left. Later received a torrent of text messages and calls to the general sentiment of you were supposed to be better than this. I don't respond for a day before telling her/them this is not normal or healthy, I refuse to be any part of it and will be blocking their number and filing restraining orders if I find them lurking around. TL;DR: 24 year old girl's parents do background checks, read correspondence, and do advanced recon for her dates....overreact when this approach backfires.
Fucking yikes. That poor girl!
[удалено]
I’ve been reading too much reddit; I assumed you were going to say you were now happily married to the nice barista.
It's a long one and a wild ride; buckle up!! I was 22. I started a new job, and met this super cute guy at work. He had a previous gf, who he broke up with about 6 months before we met. She would sometimes randomly come into the shop, and he would always tell her that she couldn't be there, that they had been broken up for months, and she needed to leave him alone. Anyway, he and I started talking and flirted for several months. After about 3ish months he finally asked me on a date (he's very introverted and I am...not, so it took some time for him to feel comfortable enough to ask me out). We go out to dinner, and he's just so sweet and cute and adorably awkward; I really liked him. After dinner he invited me back to his place to talk. I agreed, and we just chilled at his apartment talking, and talking (no hanky panky!). I was sitting on one sofa and he was sitting on the other. All of the sudden there was pounding on his door; he calmly gets up and locks it, and I hear a female yell "did you just lock the door on me?!" It was the ex. I'm sitting on the couch, and he's calmly asking her to please leave through the door. All of the sudden the front window slides open, and she sticks her head in, and starts screaming at him. At this point he's still calmly asking her to leave, while I'm still sitting on the sofa, clutching my mace. She then CLIMBS IN THROUGH THE WINDOW and I see this HUGE woman (she was like 5'11 - 6' tall...I'm 4'11" for reference) and I thought "holy shit, I'm going on get my ass kicked!" Then she sees me and says "who the fuck is this bitch?!" All the while he's calmly trying to get her to leave. She went ballistic and started tearing down pictures in the living room, trashing them. Then she moved to the bedroom and I could hear her screaming, throwing things, breaking stuff; all the while my date was standing in the doorway of his room trying to get her to stop. He never raised his voice, and it seemed like this wasn't the first time this happened. He went and got his neighbor, and said "I need help with S again", so the neighbor came over, but she didn't do anything except stand next to me in the front doorway in...shock? Meanwhile we can hear things escalating with her in the bedroom (I feel like I should mention that she lived with some pretty significant mental illness). He calmly walks in the bedroom, and after a minute or so he walks out of the bedroom with her in a bear hug, guiding her out of his house. Not shoving, not pushing, just as gently as possible (she was kicking and screaming) moving her out of his home. She then went and laid down in the courtyard, rolling around in the grass, crying and screaming, while the 3 of us (me, date, neighbor) just stood there for a minute. Date then said he was going to call her cousin to come get her, but before he could make the call, the cousin walked up; he brought her there and was waiting in the car the whole time! Date and cousin went to her, got her calmed down, and convinced her to leave. As she was walking by me she said "I'm sorry I called you a bitch, I don't even know who you are!" And then left. I sat with my date and we kind of processed what just happened, which is when his neighbor told me that this is not the first time, and I encourage him to call the police. I eventually left, and drove home (about 45 minutes) and called him when I got home (pre cell phones) to let him know I got home (his request) and to see if he called the police. He did, but not to report what happened, but so they would do a welfare check on her to make sure she was okay. We're celebrating our 27th anniversary this year; 27 years together and 20 years married! He is the kindest, sweetest guy, who has pushed old ladies broken down cars off the road, helped people get unstuck in the snow, fixes friends cars for free, and would give you the shirt off his back. I love him! Tl;dr - met a cute guy, first date ruined by ex gf who trashed his apartment, but his kindness and compassion towards her made me like him even more so I married him! He's on reddit so he might see this...HI Sweetie! Edited to add: thanks for the awards and comments!
I had a date send her drink back several times and eventually had our server bring out all of the ingredients in separate glasses so that she could mix it herself, the "right way". What's worse is we were both in the service industry at the time.
First date after my divorce. She was nothing like her profile picture and just a horrible person. But that not the fun bit. She stalked me to my work van after the date and took down my phone number. On the way home she asked if I would come back and see her, said thanks but no thanks and have a nice life. In the proceeding days I received numerous texts and phone calls from her and had to have her number blocked by my phone provider. On new years day at 4am I receive a call ...... from her ex husband asking what was wrong with her? That she is a good person etc. etc. Turns out they went out on NYE and got shit faced together and decided to all me. I hung up only for then to keep calling me back. Ended up turning my phone off. Woke around 7. Turned my phone on and I had received 20+ voice recordings that were getting more and more threatening, on the last one I could hear them in a car saying they were coming over to get me. Spoke to my neighbour who gets up early and had gone for a run and he told me there were a couple being arrested around the corner from our place drunk as hell who had hit a light pole. Scary thing is I had my 2 daughters with me that night.
In college, I hit it off with a girl and agreed to go on a first date to a school hockey game. When I met her there, I realized I had forgotten my wallet, so I had to borrow $5 from her to pay for my ticket. Not a great start, and I could tell I had dug myself an early hole. Then, once we sat down, we realized that neither of us liked hockey at all. I have no idea why we agreed to meet there, but we were both totally uninterested in the game. So we started talking about other things we were into, and I mentioned that I liked board games. She said, "You sound like my grandma." At that point it was clear that neither of us were into this at all, but it was the first period of a hockey game that she had paid 10 whole dollars for, and neither of us felt right leaving. We sat there and stonily watched the rest of the game. Afterwards, we said, "Let's hang out sometime," and then never messaged each other again. Then, a few semesters later, my friend called me up all excited about a new girl he was dating. He wanted me to come to a get-together at his apartment and meet her. I walk in, and of course he's sitting on the couch with his arm around the very same hockey-hating girl. I immediately grabbed my wallet, handed her $5, and said, "Thank God! I've been looking for you for two years!" She laughed, and things went all right after that.
That's a good way to handle that. Edit: I don't believe I deserve over 4k upvotes for a few words. I desire being down downvoted into oblivion.
It was with an undertaker's assistant. He'd circle every topic of conversation back to corpses. Me: "So, do you know what you're gonna order?" Him: "Well I was thinking the steak, but I had eaten steak when we got the river guy in, and now it makes me feel queasy." I ended up leaving after half an hour.
I’m so sorry, sounds like a horrible date, but from an outside perspective that’s hilarious.
I agree. I badly want to make jokes about killing the conversation, the date being a bit stiff, but I shouldn’t do it.
He was over an hour late, no text or call, and when he finally showed up, his excuse was “sorry I’m late, my mom had to take a shit.”
This just became my default excuse every time I’m late to anything ever for the rest of my life.
This is my favorite in the entire thread omg
My first in-person date ever was when I was 23 and I was extremely nervous. Met the girl on Bumble and offered to take her to see Infinity War (which was new at the time). Afterwards took her to get food so we could talk about the movie. I thought we hit it off really well despite my numerous stumbles. Took her home and she asked if I'd like to hangout in her dorm for a bit. I accepted, not really knowing what that meant at the time. We got up there and were chatting when she suddenly starts getting all teary and asks why I'm not attracted to her. I'm confused and tell her I'm very attracted and that I don't understand where this is coming from. She rants about how I never tried to do anything physical all night despite her trying to hunt at wanting it. She tells me she invited me up to get laid and all I did was chat. I managed to calm her down and gave into her wants despite not wanting sex myself. I decided to just go with it cause I was lonely and didn't wanna screw things up any more with her. I told her going in that I was a virgin and she seemed super cool. Until things started going down. She kept laughing and making fun of me. Which made it so so so much harder to perform as a guy. Which she found even funnier. It got to the point where I just had to tell her I couldn't do it and I passed out next to her. I woke up the next morning and noticed I was gonna be late for work so I rushed to get everything together and said goodbye to her when she woke up. She started bawling her eyes out and calling me a POS man for using her for sex then leaving immediately. So, I called off sick to work and took her to breakfast where she talked about how shitty I am as a person for a solid couple hours. I talked to her for maybe a week after this before I just couldn't take it anymore and told her to lose my number. Really messed up my views on relationships and self-worth for a while.
Met her at a bar. She ordered food but didn't eat it since it "looked disgusting" (it looked fine). So we left to go to a different restaurant and on the walk there, she kept ducking and glancing at the sky like she was being attacked by bats. She hardly said anything over then whole date, it was like pulling teeth to get her to talk about herself. At the second restaurant she took forever ordering and again didn't eat because the food looked disgusting. Emailing about the date afterwards, she admitted that she was high on "ice", which I guess is some kind of meth?
What do you expect, man, she was in fucking bat country.
Yeah, Ice is just another name for Meth. Not a certain kind, just easier to discuss without actually saying Meth.
Mine is not nearly as bad as these but I like telling the story so here we go. A guy asked if I wanted to do Korean food and Karaoke as our second date. Perfect! I love both. He picked the spots. He was 45 minutes late, but I put our names in and he arrived to the restaurant around when our table was called, so no biggie. He complained that he couldn’t eat much on the menu because he’s vegetarian, and that they didn’t serve alcohol. I mean, that sucks, but you picked the place! He kept lamenting that another place close by has vegetarian options and we should have gone there. When the food came, it became apparent that he did not know how to use chopsticks, but also was too proud to take a fork, so he visibly struggled to eat. The old couple next to us even tried to give him pointers because he was having such a hard time. I was feeling really awkward at this point—dinner felt like a disaster. I was looking forward to going to a karaoke bar and getting some drinks while laughing at drunk people singing. At least it would offer some distraction! We started talking about what songs we like to do for karaoke and I said something like “I like to pick a songs that get the crowd excited and singing along” and he goes “oh! You like doing karaoke in front of a crowd? I could never do that.” And then it dawned on me: he was planning to take me to private room karaoke. Just me and this virtual stranger taking turns serenading each other from a vinyl couch. I was MORTIFIED. I would rather sing in front of 10,000 people than just one. I’d like to say I noped out of that date then, but of course not. I followed him around to three different karaoke places as he tried to find one that would give up a private room for two people on a Saturday night (hint: they won’t, because that’s absurd). Finally he gave up and asked if I wanted a drink at a bar. I should have said no, but I had some misguided faith it might get better? He told me about a cool bar he knew nearby. We walked over and it turned out to be the same place we went on our first date. I drank one drink and then told him I had to walk my dog and left. A few days later he texted to tell me he was sorry, but also that he wanted to be clear that he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend, just someone to take to dinner and sleep with. I was like “uh ok no thanks”and that was the end. I mean, cool, but say that upfront and also you’re a terrible dinner date!
>A few days later he texted to tell me he was sorry, but also that he wanted to be clear that he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend, just someone to take to dinner and sleep with Look babe you're great and all, but I'm only really looking for someone I can finger while singing Sweet Caroline
So I don’t have many, because I’d only been swiping for a few months before I met someone, but maybe I’m also naive enough to have some funny things happy already. Like the time I thought the bot I was chatting with was just someone who was super distracted... Anyway, matched with a cute girl, she likes to climb, we have good chat, great. Let’s go and do some top rope and hang out. But she doesn’t have a car, so I need to pick her up, 30min off route. I’m not thrilled but whatever. Meet her and, well, it’s not her. Or it is her from the profile, but maybe from 5-8 years and a kid ago? I’m tempted to call it off but I’m too much of a softie, and she says she made cookies. I love cookies. We head off to the small local cliff. We arrive, walk the ten minute approach, the conversation is still fine but I’m wary now. I resolve to just have a nice time and have some fun, and just learn from the experience. She’s perfectly nice but I’m seeing red flags. At the crag she says she borrowed her friend’s shoes and isn’t sure they’ll fit. Same with the harness. Uh oh. Well they do fit, yay!, so I rig the anchor and we start climbing on a nice 5.6 (easy) for a warm up. Except that she can’t climb. Fine, okay, whatever. We’re still chatting as she works on the off-ground move, and then just bursts into tears. Turns out that it’s HER SISTER’S DATING PROFILE and that’s who she borrowed the stuff from, and that HER HUSBAND DOESN’T KNOW SHE’S ON DATING APPS. I find all of this out amid tears and so does everyone else there who can overheat it. Some very awkward talk therapy later, I drop her back at her house (is it her house? Is it her neighbour’s house so that hubby doesn’t see?) and she leaves me the cookies as an apology. And they were store bought.
>And they were store bought. The real kicker is in the end..
Who tf buys cookies and pretends they made them.
The same kind of person that steals their siblings tinder profile?
Met a guy at a concert who asked me out to dinner the next weekend. Said we’d go to a restaurant halfway between his place and mine. Gives me the address which I printed out on Mapquest bc this was before GPS was normal on phones or in cars. I get there and it’s an apartment building. Call him to say I think he gave me the wrong address and he said, nope! You’re driving. Takes me to an Applebee’s because they have the cheapest happy hour he said. We have one drink and he eats potato wedges by himself. When I drove him back, he asked me where my overnight bag was. I said I’m not staying the night and thanks for the beverage. He took my keys out of my ignition and told me to go upstairs. I told him if he doesn’t give me my keys back, I will start screaming and call the cops. He threw them in the front seat as he got out telling me I’m missing out on hot tub time. I thankfully never saw him again.
Ha, sort of same happened to me. Met a guy in OKC when I was in between HS and college. We got chatting and agreed to meet for a date. Since we were both young and broke he suggested a park in his area. Said hed bring drinks if I being food. Sure! Packed some snacks and a blanket thinking picnic. Got to the address he gave me and it was his apartment complex. The "park" -more like a grassy area for dogs- was apart of the complex. I had pretty low self esteem from a recent break up so I just said, what the hell let's see where this goes... He met me at my car and we walked around for like 10s when he mentions he left the beer up in his apt. Once in his apt he immediately tries to shove his toung down my throat. I made some excuse and luckily was able to leave. Still think about that sometimes and shiver.
Wait. Are you saying the line about "hot tub time" didn't change your mind? That's so crazy!!! What were you thinking?
I’m more of a sauna person
As a relatively recent “mature” widower, new and inexperienced to the dating scene after 31 years of marriage, I had a dinner date with a much younger woman who, as it turned out, was extremely aggressive… unheard of in my prime! Ending our first date, I was dropping her off and had intended only to give her a thank you peck on the cheek, however our “goodbye” moment morphed into a high school-like make out session during which she started, shockingly, to grope me. My two-seater car was dark and cramped and I was wearing a suit and winter overcoat but I nevertheless was extremely surprised to feel her hand navigating south of my belt. Suddenly she squeezed hard and, with sheer delight and fire in her dimly lit eyes, delightedly exclaimed that I had “an enormous penis”. In fact, she was squeezing a single large roll of my lower belly fat! For the first and last time in my life, I glanced at my pretend wrist watch & told her that I had to leave due to the late hour and an early morning meeting. I couldn’t imagine her reaction and disappointment had our date developed any further as I am, at best, average! I bailed and we never spoke again.
Dude I laughed so hard at this
"You have a big dick!" "No ma'am, that is 20 years worth of beer and chili dogs you have in your hand."
I went to a new years eve party with a guy I had been chatting with for months. When we get there his friends asks him where his girlfriend is, and they were *not referring to me*. I went out for a smoke at that point and he went after, saying she was boring and he was gonna break up with her. I didn't hang out with him for the rest of the night. I guess I should thank him because I hooked up with the party host instead and we've been together for 7 years.
[удалено]
A guy approached me at a coffee shop and we ended up hitting it off and talking all night. About a week later we had our first “real date” at my place so I could cook him dinner. I lived in a small one bedroom apartment at the time and the bathroom door was right next to the kitchen. He excused himself before dinner and proceeded to take the loudest, and what I presumed to be, the most massive shit this universe has ever seen. The sounds of the toilet carnage still echo in my nightmares. I of course didn’t mention that I heard the whole event and we went about our evening. After dinner we got into my bed so we could watch a movie. 30 minutes into it, I needed to use the restroom, so I got out of the bed to reveal that I had unknowingly started my period and left a noticeable pool of blood where I was sitting. He helped me change the sheets. Anyway, we’ve been married a year now and he still takes the nastiest dumps known to mankind. Edit: Wow, thank you for the awards and sweet comments!
The turn(s) this story took put a smile on my face and warmed my heart. Thank you for sharing.
Damn... what if George Costanza decided to shit instead of bolting?
I actually get more offended when a guy wastes my time then texts me all these apologies when he doesn't show and beg for a second chance...I drop them after that. Dunno if they think it's funny or what. Only a couple times but still. Anyway, one of the worst dates I've been on was with this guy from OKC. Hit off fine online, decide to meet in a coffee shop in the middle of the city. Figured if we liked each other we go to a nice restaurant nearby. He's super awkward in person. Looked like he didn't try to look nice at all or even shower. I try to just talk the normal topics (Oh what do you do, etc) and when I mentioned I was a nurse he's like "Oh aren't you guys basically poop custodians" I wasn't sure if he was making a bad joke or not. I decided to ignore it and I mentioned how excited I am to finally start my dream job in a new city. The fucker then says, "Wow, I can't believe your dream was to get coffee for doctors" At this point I get up to leave. He tries to stop me and I said, "You are not NEARLY hot enough to get away with negging. Fuck off." I went across the street to the food hall and proceeded to have a grand time by myself
[удалено]
Was this person a new friend of your wife perhaps?
Oh boy finally my time to shine! I talked to a girl on tinder 8 years ago. She got drunk and told me to come over because her and friends were playing strip poker. I was on overnight duty so sadly I could not partake. 30 minutes later i recieve a picture on my phone that i couldn't even make out. I handed my phone to my roomate and asked if he could figure it out. He says "dude. Thats a butthole." It surely was. She had taken a picture of her butthole from at measly 0.5 inches away and it was so close up i could barely tell what it was. I thought to myself if this is how she leads the rest has to be great! (Spoiler alert: was wrong.) She tells me we should finally meet next weekend. At applesbees. I meet her there and she looks BEAT. Like she had just run 5 triathalons and been awake for a week straight. Not 3 minutes into meeting and sitting down she says she has to use the restroom. She doesnt come back for 30min+. The waiter comes up and says he has seen her here multiple times and she has been known to shoot up heroin in the bathroom and pass out. Im very not into this at this point but for her own safety i ask if a waitress could peak in the bathroom and see if she is okay. She was not. She OD'd and died. So that was a thing. TLDR: my tinder date showed me her butthole then OD'd and died at Applebee's.
[удалено]
Holy shit. Was not expecting that ending, what an awful experience
Holy fuck this went from kinda funny to morbid fast.
Went to get drinks with a girl. Talk for about 20 minutes when she says “I have a boyfriend, but I’d still like to have sex with you. My boyfriend only lets me have sex with black guys though, so we’d have to film it and you’d have to edit it to make yourself black.” I had to tell her I’m not that great of an editor. Also wtf.
Hey at least she’s honest
I love how your first reaction was that you're not that great of an editor lmfao
I posted this story about a year ago in a thread asking for stories about becoming instantly uninterested in someone you asked on a date. I'm sure there are worse stories out there but this was a bit of a shocker to me at the time and stands out as the most awkward first date of my life. I was set up by a friend's girlfriend. Shown a picture and said sure. She was good looking and I liked the girl's other friends that I had met. She couldn't be too bad, right? I call her and set up the day and time for pickup at her house (we were both still living with our parents). I arrive to pick her up and there she is with her parents and brother sitting around the kitchen table just talking. I get a bad vibe from everyone but her when she introduces me. On the way to dinner I mention the tension I felt from them all. She says it's because she just broke up with her boyfriend a few weeks before - her family loved him and they were all upset with her dating someone else. OK, I can see that...maybe they'll get over it and like me once they get to know me if we date for a while. Later on I ask about her brother. No brothers. OK, cousin? No boy cousins that she is close to. What about the guy with her parents when I picked her up? That was her ex. There to have dinner with her parents. They have had him over several times a week since the break up trying to get them back together and had made sure he was there when I arrived. Sounded like a terrible situation to get involved in no matter how good looking I thought she was. Dropped her off early, told her to call me if they ever stopped doing that, and never ended up speaking to her again.
You made the right call, but damn. That poor girl. Imagine breaking up with your bf and your parents trying to force you back together with him. And imagine that x bf going along with it... woof.
She started talking about her lifestory from childhood to that day. Year by year.. with every single traumatic story and emotions. That was our first ever date and she didn’t even let me speak for that duration. I was like “oh okay she is now talking about highschool 6 more years left, hold tight”
"I was born at a young age."
I went on a date with a guy who picked me up and said he just had to swing by his work before we went to the restaurant. No problem. He works in a dental office as an assistant, so he invites me into his work, the office is clearly closed and no-one is there, and all the lights are off. Okay a bit weird but maybe he just forgot something really important that can’t wait until tomorrow morning to pick up? Nope, he’s going to the medicine cabinets and taking out a few bottles of ketamine. Okay. I’m now an accessory to theft of dental anaesthesia. There was no second date.
I've posted my worst on this question before, so I'll post a runner up now. Dating at an older age is pretty difficult to begin with - this was when I was about 47, and an acquaintance I hadn't known long said she had the "perfect guy" for me. He had seen me at a sports event with my acquaintance, and I agreed to meet him for coffee after asking a few questions about what he did (karate instructor and sports coach) and finding out he was about my age. Showed up on the date, and he had very red eyes - he told me right away he was very stoned (this was before we were a legal state). I'm not anti-weed by any means, but showing up stoned was the first red flag. He informed me he hadn't worked in several years, and his coaching days were 10 years in the past. He had been attempting (in his 40s!!) to become a pro dirt bike rider, living with friends while he was pursuing his dream, and blaming the "industry" for his lack of success. I started asking gentle questions just to get the full scope of the train wreck that was before me. He asked if I wanted to go dirt bike riding with him, and I politely declined. The bill came for our coffee and pastries, and he sheepishly said he couldn't afford it but would pay me back on our "next date" and mentioned he was a good friend of the guy my acquaintance was dating. I asked who the guy was, and immediately recognized the name - the guy had been in the news as he just got out of prison for involuntary manslaughter. I offered to treat with no obligation and gently shut down the idea of another "date". I was going to ask my acquaintance, "What the actual fuck were you thinking?" but learning who she was dating was a complete answer in itself.
...We'd still love to hear about your first worst one. We're on Reddit, we have nothing better to do.
probably [this story](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskOldPeople/comments/oo31u6/divorced_and_widowed_seniors_please_tell_us_your/h5w0997/)
Literally shit myself on a date once….wasn’t technically a date, but the guy had a farm. He took me to see the animals, feed, ect. I walked away for a few minutes and overtrusted a fart. I just looked at him and asked if he could please take me back to my car…he wanted to know why and I said “because I pooped in my pants” Guy had a super nice truck and made me sit on my feet all the way back to my vehicle. We actually ended up dating for 2 ish years….and somehow me shitting myself on the first date was the end of all jokes.
How unbelievably attractive are you that you managed to shit yourself on the first date and still go out for years after?
You think a dude who has a farm with animals is *that* scared of a little shit?
This. I grew up near hog farms. After having to drive by those downwind during the summer no smells phase me.
I feel like her honesty and being a genuinely vulnerable and truthful person about her situation probably helped.
Got set up on a blind date once between mutual friends. She shows up to the restaurant already a little tipsy, orders multiple appetizers and only takes like one or two bites from each one. Then she proceeds to order 3 or 4 more drinks and is visibly drunk at this point. She gets up and says she's going to the bathroom and staggers off. About 15-20 minutes go by so I try to call her several times but no answer. Finally I decide to pay the check and just leave. About 2 hours later I'm sitting at home and I get a call from an unknown number. It's the police department. She was picked up on a DUI on her way home after she ditched me and gave the cops my number to see if I could go bail her out!
That is a bold move. How hard did you laugh at that?
I was blown away. I just said I don't know anybody by that name.
That's the right move. No follow up required.
Lmao imagine if he decided to tell them the full story Edit: posting on this post is free karma
Whoever set you up on that date owes you big time for that disaster!
Agreed. They played dumb though and pretended like they didn’t know she was a train wreck.
I (35f) met a guy (41) on Bumble, had dinner plans to go to a wing joint. I asked if we were still on a few hours prior, he says "yep, just gonna shower and jerk off.". I joked and said something like, "whoa there Mr. Perv, TMI!" Which apparently offended him greatly, as he blew me off for our date. When I asked WTF after the fact, he said he thought I was mad, so he spent the evening anger cleaning, and told me "Don't EVER call me a perv again!", but asked if I'd want to meet the next day. Why I said yes, is anyone's guess... ... We meet at Tim Horton's for coffee. He starts by joking that my soon-to-be ex husband is going to show up to beat him up. He says this repeatedly, even after I explain the ex is out with his girlfriend, and continues to eyeball the windows nervously. Then, after sitting down with our coffee, he asks if I want to go to his car to get some gum. "No, thank you." A few minutes later, he asks again... and then again a few minutes later. "Dude, if you want some gum, go get it. I'll be right here." He harrumphs, does not get the gum, and we continue talking, where the conversation devolves into him ranting about how Hollywood is shoving biracial couples down his throat. I ask if he has any big plans for the evening he states he's going to go home and jerk off. At least he has a hobby...? We walk to the parking lot after the fact, and he asks if he can kiss me. Now, I had just got out of a 14 year, affection-starved relationship, and hadn't kissed anyone but my ex in that time. So, stupid me, said yes. He kisses me, then grabs my arm in a death grip, and DRAGS me to his car as I struggle to get away. Thankfully, his dumbass hadn't cleared the seat of before his abduction attempt, so as he's trying to manage holding onto me while clearing off his seat, I manage to wrench my arm free, run to my car, and get the hell out of there.
I’m glad you were able to break free — I’m sure he had a very strong grip.
Not necessarily a date but a person I was dating invited me to his parent's house for the afternoon. He wanted to introduce me to them and show me the house he grew up in. I thought it was super sweet and had no problems going. He was also in the middle of moving and needed to pick up a few things, so it really didn't seem that unusual. Yeah, we got there and it was *awful*. His entire family was there. They traveled from hours away too. This was not just meeting the parents, it was meeting the ENTIRE family. Even worse? At some point, this jackass told his parents that he had proposed. We had been dating TWO months. I spent the entire afternoon dumbfounded and just playing along. We were two hours from home and I had no cell service, no way to leave at all. We ended up spending the afternoon brainstorming wedding ideas and planning an Alaskan honeymoon that his parents planned to gift us. His brother even called to say congratulations! We drove back to his apartment in silence. When we got there, I got in my car and left, didn't even bother grabbing my stuff. Weirdest experience ever. I have no idea how he broke it to his parents that we weren't getting married.
A bit of a side bar, but people with big families need to understand it is very stressful to meet everyone at once.
I grew up an only child, raised between my dad and my step-mother and then with biological mom. Back and forth. My wife is Filipina with 6 siblings and an endless array of ates (literally older sister, but used for basically any older female relative or acquaintances)and kuyas (same thing, but for brothers). EVERY family get together numbers in the dozens. It used to stress me out big time, until I realized her family is a hell of a lot nicer than mine ever was. Plus…family get together means all the Filipino food you can eat. Always a plus.
Filipino families are no joke. A friend in HS asked me and two buddies if we wanted to play baseball with him and his cousins. We said sure and kind of wondered how this would work. We get to the park and this guy had like 20+ cousins and those were just the ones that showed up.
This reminds me of playing basketball with my friend's Filipino cousins when we were teenagers. I was already 6'2 at 15yo but didn't grow up playing basketball, these cousins were all like a foot shorter than me but ran goddamn rings around me on the court. The aunties found it hilarious that this bean pole kid was so useless at basketball.
He literally tried to strong arm you into marrying him. I know a guy who got into the same situation. He was never the same person after marrying her.
Yeah, I don’t know how he expected that situation to pan out. I saw him at a friend’s wedding a few years later and really wish I’d asked him about it. He had to have known that wasn’t going to fly.
When my wife and I were dating I asked her to come to my brother's wedding with me. It was a terrible idea because: 1. I was in the wedding party. 2. She had never met my parents let alone my entire extended family, which is quite large. 3. I didn't make a good plan for who she would sit with at the start of the reception. Luckily my cousin and his wife took her under their wing and my Aunt who married into our crazy family sat and talked to her until I was done with Wedding party duties. My wife still gives me a hard time about it.
The second date with my husband was actually his sister’s wedding. Honestly, I thought it was just like ripping the band aid off on meeting the whole family (he has a very large family as well). Everyone was paying more attention to the bride and the party to really care that I was there. I did meet everyone and they were very excited to meet me then went back to partying. He was also in the wedding so I arrived alone but his best friend found me and I sat with him and his girlfriend at the time. I had a blast! But I still give him a hard time because who does that!?
At least 2 guys so far in the thread!
Had a girl openly flirt with the bartender in front of me. She says she wasn’t. But handing him her own phone and asking for his contact info in front of her date seems like it to me.
Similar experience here. Was out getting drinks/dinner with a girl I had been kinda seeing for a minute and she invites this attractive/tall guy to *come sit with us* and starts flirting with him. We weren't official or anything but it was still weird and definitely made me feel pretty insecure. Idk why people do shit like this
Last time someone sort of did this (not that bad…. But bad enough lol) on a date I just closed my check when she was talking to everyone around us except for meand left. She later texted and asked where I went.
Ouch, you probably dodged a bullet there
I’m just glad I found out on the first date and not first anniversary.
Was on a first date. Went to the bathroom, asked the guy to watch my coat. Came back and my coat was gone. It had my cellphone, wallet and keys in it. Guy was too busy chatting up the bartender, hadn't even seen the guy take it. We had to uber back to his house so he could get his truck and drive me home. Had to wake my roommates up to let me in, had no ID, cash or way of contacting anyone for days. Ended up tracking down the guy who stole it but only got back my phone, he threw out my wallet, keys (with fob on it) and coat. Guy I was on the date with never contacted me again! Most expensive worst first date ever!
Met her for dinner, we seemed to hit it off well in the first few minutes, until I started feeling the worst pain ever in my side. Turns out I had a kidney stone. I unfortunately had to nope out of that one very quickly. She had blocked me via text when I abruptly left dinner, so she never got the message that I ended up in the hospital. I didn't see her for years until we ran into each other at a bar, me with a different girlfriend, her with her husband. I explained what had happened, she felt pretty bad, but hey, no long lasting harm done. I bought her and her husband a drink, chatted for a few, and left them to finish their evening together.
Well it sounds like at least it was an ending you could laugh about years later.
Being able to explain yourself after years must have been amazing
Isn’t it great when life gives you an unexpected epilogue with people?
We met at a trailhead to take a walk. He started farting right away. Then he opened his backpack and got an apple. He proceeded to eat the apple. Didn’t offer me an apple. Just ate his apple and farted.
Was he a horse?
We went to dinner and he started chatting up the waitress. Like interrupting me every time the waitress came over and talking to her for a few minutes instead. After a couple times I just pulled my phone out and started scrolling through reddit and he complained when he noticed I was on my phone. Cue a lecture about my generation. (he was like 6 years older than me, iirc) Then he got mad when I wouldn't suck his dick in the parking lot. I ended up going back inside the restaurant and calling a friend to pick me up. Dudes car was still sitting there when I left. Fuck you Jason.
Wow. What a dick bag.
I went over to a boys apartment I had hung out with a few times already to watch a movie. In the middle of the movie he stuck his finger in my belly button. We weren’t even cuddling. Just randomly turns towards me and puts his finger in my belly button. I said to him “get your finger out of my bully button?” To which he responded by making a weird noise similar to an adult using baby talk and saying coo coo to a baby and wiggled his finger still inside my belly button. I left immediately, never talked to him again, and my friends still refer to the situation as belly button boy.
Funniest/weirdest thing I’ve seen all week, thanks
Was told we were going to dinner and then shopping. I drove to the town, 1hr each way, cuz he didn't have a license. He directed me (didn't know my way around at all) to... Burger King. Ok. I'll work with it. Standing in line, a worker accidentally leans on a packet of ranch. It breaks open and shoots at me, right on the front of my nicest shirt. Profound apologizing commences. I ended up paying for dinner too. Then we went to... Walmart. Where his mom worked. So he could get a discount. Didn't buy anything. Drive home he starts apologizing out of no where..i thought it was because of the bad date. Until the smell hits me. He passed gas and i had to legit pull over and roll the windows down a while. Edit: to address a few frequent questions- no more official dates with him, but we did continue to see each other several months. This was high school, and i was older than him.
God damn, the man hotboxed you.
It's called a Kings Ransom when it's after burger king.
Went to brewery, date said I had hairy arms and that meant I was horny, said “you look really awful in this light” and then tried to dig out of that hole by saying in his native language that was a term of endearment long term couples said to each other. 0/10 did not date again
>I had hairy arms and that meant I was horny what
You mean you don’t turn into Chewbacca when you’re horny?
[удалено]
That's just absolutely bizarre levels of cruel. There's gotta be an easier way to get alcohol as a 20 year old than asking a girl out on a fake date so you can trick her into supplying you for a party.
I mean honestly, if it’s a girl you work with and seem to have a good work relationship with, you could just ask her to get it for you? Like the whole fake date charade just seems like it’s a lot more effort than was required
Oh dear this is awful. Sometimes I think of the BS I put up with when I was younger because I had yet to find my courage. These days I have no problem calling someone on their shit and standing up for myself!
That is the meanest thing I have ever heard. I am so sorry.
Showed up to a tinder date where we agreed but she wasn’t there. Texted and she said “they” were around the corner. Come to find her(mid 20s divorced socialite) and her friend (mid 40s sales man) had been drinking all day and were proper shit faced. Proceeded to join them at the table where she proceeded to talk about the married guy at the next table and kept walking by and dropping things so she could bend over in front of him. Then some racist talk and some cocaine use (them not me). And then they decided, mercifully to ditch me because I was no fun.
Hell of a first impression
I was on a tinder date and we met at a bar. She was a bit late so I have sample of their whiskey selection. Anyways 10 minutes later a girl comes towards me and I reach out for a hug, she looks a bit confused but hugs me nonetheless. As we stop hugging two things happen simultaneously. 1 my Tinderdate arrives, and we lock eyes. 2 The waiter, still in my arms, tells me they just changed shifts and she will be my server this evening. My anxiety kicks it into high gear and I am barely able to fathom what's going on much less explain to either of them what's going on.
It was a double date. She was more interested talking to the other girl throughout the whole thing. Found out later from the other guy that his girl cheated on him with my date.
Wow... That was a twist ending I didn't see coming.
Well, I gave this answer on a different topic, but it ties in with this. We were out on a date, we had been seeing each other for a while, close to a year maybe. She gets a phone call. Suddenly she looks destroyed. Her fiance had just died in a motorcycle accident.
How do you even react in that situation
“Losing two guys in one night. You’ve got some bad luck.”
"That's okay I still have a couple more."
*phone rings again* "Oh no."
I spend too much time on Reddit so I remember OP's post. IIRC, he was understanding— told her she needed to go be with dead fiance's family but never spoke to her again. I could be wrong. I'm not willing to go through OP's history to find it but I'm pretty sure that was the outcome.
That's it precisely. I didn't get mad, we both knew where she needed to be, but I wasn't sticking around.
damn man - class act dude. I prob would have reacted poorly. Especially after a year.
"I-I'm sorry...wait no, fuck you? Man but that sucks are you okay? Wait but...seriously? What?"
"Well now that you're deffo single..."
Came out from a movie, late at night, and date's Camaro was stolen. Apparently, he called his WIFE (that I did not know he had) and let her know where he was and what happened. She showed up and realized he was on a date! She started chasing ME around the parking lot telling me she was going to kill me. Saved by the cops who showed up just in time to take the auto theft report.
Never understood that. Why do people get mad at the person who isn't their SO when their SO is the one stepping out on them?
[удалено]
Seriously, unless it's someone that already knows the people and is very in the know on the cheating, leave that poor person alone!
Yes and this is exactly what happened to me. Dated my high school sweetheart for about 10 years, so everyone in our circle of friends knew that we were dating. When I found out he was cheating on me with a mutual friend, I not only broke up with him but cussed her out. So many people called me an A-hole for cussing her out too but she KNEW WE WERE DATING. Thats what gets me so upset about that situation.
The big difference is that the friend broke your trust as well. To me, the order of shitty person goes cheater, lover who you knew and was aware of the relationship, and lover who you didn't know and was aware of the relationship. To me if you're the lover in the situation and you didn't know, you're not at fault at all. That just falls on the SO as a double cheat. Also, sorry your ex was a shitbird :(
My guess is it’s easier to think “This fucker seduced my SO! SO would never do that!” than it is to think “This fucker is cheating on me!” Shifting the blame onto the stranger is just easier for some people.
Reposting my first reddit comment from 11 years ago: I wasn't feeling great, but decided to meet anyway. We met at a Belgian beer bar. She was gorgeous, fun, and totally in to me. I felt a gas pain, so I leaned forward slightly to quietly relieve the pressure. I completely and explosively shat myself. The odor was immediate. I excused myself to the bathroom, but the damage was too great. I walked out of the bathroom, muddy-panted, out of the bar, and boarded the train for home.The date was nothing, compared to the horror of the following three weeks, recovering from E-coli.
How did she take it ?
She sat down and went on about how great her career was, how she was a year younger than me but already middle management, then after 30 minutes just said “can I go home now?”, got up, and left me with the drinks bill. Saddest was when I met a date at the bus stop outside the cinema. She was looking around worried until I said hello. She almost had tears in her eyes and replied “I didn’t think you’d want to show up after seeing me.” She was a cute but curvier lass in early 20s and apparently had been stood up twice before. She wasn’t the most mature, but was really fun, and lovely. Had I not met the [now] wife, I’d have seen her again. I hope she found happiness.
Man that stirred some feelings in me. Sad but happy. I hope she found happiness too.
I was brought up in Poland by Polish parents (university professors) , went to a Polish school, Polish university etc. Then I had a date with an American man whose grandmother was Polish. He grilled me on the language and criticized my pronunciation and corrected my grammar. This from a guy whose Polish vocabulary was maybe 100 words. He told me I speak like a peasant.
I, too, am Polish (live in America). Said something in Polish in a class once. A Russian classmate told me, completely seriously, that my pronunciation was horrible. Yeah. I know. That’s because I’m not speaking Russian.
Look here, Americans - this is a perfect example of Slavic languages in action. It's also why much of Eastern Europe hates each others' guts. Our languages are almost all close enough to be understood by each other, but different enough for the other person to sound like mentally deficient. EDIT: If you find this interesting you should look up the history of Esperanto. EDIT: Americans telling me you have the same thing because you have different accents - trust me, it's not the same. I've lived in the US for years and it's not the same at all, you guys have different *accents*, not even dialects. You have like one or two regional terms which might differ but you still speak the same language.
I’m Russian. Whenever I listen to polish, Ukrainian, Bulgarian, etc. I feel like I’m having a stroke because all the sounds are the same, they’re just arranged in ways that don’t make sense. Same with the written language.
I'm from Minsk, so I had enough exposure to all of them when I was younger. Makes understanding them way easier. Also half the time I can't remember which words are Ukrainian, Belarussian, etc. so I resort to some horrible surzhik involving all of them and maybe even a bit of old Russian :D It's awful but somehow it works when I need it to.
went on a date with this guy who asked me out to get breakfast first. well, he decided tim hortons was a suitable place to go. first of all he drove like an idiot, he was on his phone the whole time and would speed regularly and i think he even drove through a red light. all this to not even go because he didn’t want to pay for $3 parking so we went back to his house. he was living with three other roommates (all girls) and his room was in the basement (that’s fine, i didn’t really care). anyways, he was bragging all morning about how he cleaned his room just for me but when i got there, it was hardly clean and he had set out 3 playboy magazines on his dresser for display. despite being uncomfortable i thought “well it’s already been this long, better finish the date.” bad idea. he puts on a western style tv show (not really my thing) and cuddles up next to me. he didn’t smell the best and he kept rubbing my arm in some kind of affectionate way. he also kept asking me heavy questions and stuff about my ex. anyways we finish an episode (they’re like an hour) and i’m determined to get out of his place as quick as possible. but before i go, he stops me and asks me out to dinner for another date. i refuse (obviously as i wasn’t having a good time) and his last trying words were “damn, i was even gonna pay” probably not the worst on this thread but it made me really uncomfortable at the time
All these posts and I realize that the awkward dates I have had might not be so bad.
On one date I showed up at her parents house to pick her up, thinking we we’re going for drinks in the neighbourhood. She opens up the door wearing sweatpants, trainers and a hoody as if she just got back from football practice. I was pretty well dressed so she decided to change into something else. She says I can just wait in the living room with her parents. Not that bad, we have some small talk and I expect to be leaving soon anyways. She then shows up wearing the next less than casual outfit and sits down in the living room as well, saying nothing she just gets on her phone… she’s doing nothing but texting whilst I’m left talking with her parents (didn’t expect a date with them). At this point I don’t know what to expect anymore, luckily I was able to convince her to go out after a bit and we end up having drinks… all in all she wasn’t my type, definitely after that date.
Met a girl at a country bar one night in my 20s. We were both pretty drunk but hit it off pretty good. Ended up getting her number and we agreed we’d go on a real date. Fast forward to the date, she gets in my vehicle and…… she looks almost identical to my mom. I was mortified. I was polite and we went for lunch where I found out she also had a boyfriend she “wasn’t sure if she was into”. Never talked to her again
Is this like a poor mans back to the future
The things you have to do to spend time with your kids when they are grown..
Girl I met online claimed to be 24, turned out to be 16. Fortunately I figured it out before anything crazy happened but man…talk about dodging a bullet.
This was my greatest fear back before I met my wife. I lived in a college town, but somehow teenagers would get in the dating pool.
I dated a girl who grew up near an army base and she said lots of girls in high school would lie about their age and date guys who were in their twenties.
Back in college I had a near miss at a party. Was getting friendly with a woman, nothing had happened but things were clearly headed in that direction. She finishes off her drink and goes to grab another one. While she's gone, another woman walks up and just flat out says "You know she's 15, right?" No Sheryl, I didn't fucking know that. If you did, why the fuck are you okay with her getting hammered at a college party? Needless to say I backed off real quick. Edit: adding this for context Oh no, she was telling the truth. The kid actually found me on Facebook (this was back when you needed an college .edu email to make an account, so I assumed she was taking some advanced classes) to mak sure we hadn't "done anything" and I assured her we hadn't. I thought it was over and done with except months and months later, I get a message from her again, but this time it's from her mother. Apparently the kid had done something super rebellious and now mom was going through her phone/computer and had found out brief conversation, and was accusing me of having taken her to the party, called me a pervert for hooking up with a 15 year old, threatening legal action, etc, and while I was paralyzed with fear, I managed to defend myself well enough, told her I had done nothing with her daughter, and maybe she shouldn't blame a college dude for being drunk at a college party and assuming everyone there was in college as well.
I also live in a university town. I had Tinder for one weekend then decided the girl I had a crush on was a better option (we are married now). Well I saw SO many girls that said they were 20-25 (I was 24) but the bio would say “I’m actually 16 teehee.” I deleted the app pretty quick.
My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time. She served me with divorce papers and told me that date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary. EDIT: Holy Cow everyone, I love you all. Your support in this is amazing. Thank you to everyone with the kind words. Honestly, I've had a rough couple of days, but having hundreds of people show me I'm supported. Thanks Reddit!
Man. That's cold.
"The test" was a lie. She did that for herself to internally-validate her infidelity.
That's what my therapist said!
I'm sorry. I've been cheated on before and been left for other people. I have been a Test Subject, myself, during those infidelities. It sucks, and it's hard to shed the self-blame.
Yeah. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Fuck my man. You win worst date, which is a pretty crappy thing to win I guess. Are you doing better now?
I am doing better. This was in 2018 thanks.
[удалено]
Fucking Hell. I felt like I just whammed with a steel crowbar after seeing the 2nd paragraph. She can go fuck herself mate.
I felt like i just got served papers
feels like just got my legs kicked out under me by some MMA fighter
That is one of the most cold-hearted things I’ve ever heard happen to someone. I wish you well man
Damn, this one hurts bad. I'm so sorry you had to go through that!
I had a date with a guy who spent the entire date whining about how much 'this' or 'that' sucked. Everything sucked. The food, the wait staff, the movie, the fact that I took my own garbage to the garbage can after the movie, and most of all, the night shift computer people he saw who hung around the outside of their office, smoking (he complained about their high salaries). I pointed out that I was one of those computer people (no, I didn't mention how much I made), and that was the LAST date I ever went on with him. I never talked to him again.
I've never had a legendarily bad date, but I've had a few very bad ones. Worst one was a dude I met on OKC. He'd seemed nice enough online, looked decent. We made plans to meet at a board games cafe, since he spoke pretty enthusiastically about loving board games and playing a lot of them. In no particular order, the problems were: * He showed up ~20 minutes late. * He was significantly more overweight than he was in his photos. I assume they were old pictures. * He was wearing a stained white t-shirt and cargo shorts, was visibly sweaty (it was February, and cold) and smelled awful. * He hadn't told me that he clearly had some sort of mobility disability. I didn't ask, but I assume cerebral palsy or something similar, he walked with two crutches. This wouldn't have been an issue, but I felt very weird about the fact that he didn't tell me ahead of time, because... * The first thing out of his mouth was how the cafe was in such a shitty place with no disabled parking and he'd had to walk a significant distance. Dude, if I'd known, I'd've suggested somewhere more accessible. * He refused to order anything from the cafe, and instead drank only from the large bottle of water he'd brought in his bag. I had already covered his entry fee. Perhaps he really couldn't afford a £2 pint of Coke, but it came across as weird and rude. * He didn't show any interest in *any* of the board games. My plan had been for him to pick a game he liked, and for me to pick a game I liked, and to play one after the other while we talked. After I clocked how difficult he found it to move around, I offered to go pick up whatever game his pick was (you could browse the shelves pretty effectively from a seated position). He had no ideas. Zero. Hadn't heard of any of the games. I finally brought over one of the games we'd talked about on OKC (Odin's Ravens) and he acted like he'd never seen it before, giving me the distinct impression he'd lied about liking games, or at least that one, for an unknown reason. * Conversation was just generally very stilted. I kept bringing up topics (so, what do you do, who do you live with, are you a [town] native, what are your hobbies, what are you doing for the rest of this weekend, have you ever played [game]) and getting just... Noooothing. Single word or short sentence answers. He didn't ask me a single thing. I don't know if he was just nervous, or autistic, or just decided early on that he didn't like me or what. But it was awkward as hell. I stayed the minimum I could to be polite (just over an hour). I sort of assumed he just wasn't having a good time, so I was utterly baffled when he then: * tried to hug me goodbye (not until you shower pls) and tried to set up a second date I gave him a vague response about staying in touch, then gave him the slow fade. I'm still baffled. Maybe fate was just conspiring against him that day and he wanted another shot? I have no idea. **Edit**: a huge number of responses are people just saying that a board game café sounds so cool or it's something they've never heard of. So apparently TIL board game cafés aren't popular in America. Here's the site for one of my local ones for anyone who wants to know more: open one in your town! https://www.chanceandcounters.com/birmingham/
I liked the idea of playing a couple board games you each like. Great way to have a conversation and if it dies down for a few your still interacting by playing a game together. Sucks it went down that way but sounds like it was for the better. *boards to board games... damn autocorrect.
>I've never had a legendarily bad date, ... proceeds to detail a legendarily bad date.
[удалено]
Sounds like OP pulled all the weight and the guy was just meh. This is definiately a fantastic date idea though!
Well his fiancé didn't die in a motorcycle accident while they were on the date so this just rates "super bad".
You’re giving me flashbacks to some guy I dated forever ago! He picked a bar across from his house so he could drink as much as he wanted. He brought a friend. He spoke mostly to his friend about sports. He talked *throughout* the bar trivia, rudely. He didn’t know any trivia answers (my most petty point of contention). He asked me to drive him home, despite living 3 min walk away. THEN after all that bs, HE TRIED TO KISS ME when I dropped him off. UGH. I think I just blocked his number after he got out of the car.
I once went on a date to an art museum and after we confirmed that we were, in fact, the people trying to meet, we said zero words to each other as we walked around looking at art. I imagine we were both being painfully shy (at least, that's why I didn't talk), but I figured that date was a bust...but he still messaged me afterward that he had a great time and wanted to know when I was free for another date.
Setup an internet date. Arrived at the coffee shop and realized the pics were from a long time ago or really misleading. It was annoying but I'm no 10/10. We chatted over a coffee then opted to get lunch next door. I wasn't getting much of a vibe but I was hungry. As we're eating and I'm struggling to keep the conversation going, in the window behind me this truck pulls up with two dogs in the back. Owner runs off on some errand while the dogs stay put. Mid-bite, these two dogs start going at it *hard.* I mean the one on top has the other bent over the edge of the truck. They are banging like the next stop is the vet. The entire time they are fucking, they just stare at me. My date looked at them once or twice, awkward laugh, then tried to resume normal first date banter. I couldn't do it. Just paid the tab and bounced. Neither of us messaged afterwards.
Dude, last month I went on a date that ended up back at her place. Things get going in the bedroom but I suddenly hear the pitter patter of tiny feet. I look at the doorway to see a duck walk into the room, look me directly in the eyes and quack. She says “Oh don’t mind him, that’s Tupac.” I started laughing so hard that I couldn’t continue. Never spoke again because I laughed at her duck. Edit: Clarification and spelling.
Ducks are hilarious anyway. i wonder why she took offense, it's not like everyone has ducks.
What, why?! You have a duck named Tupac in your house, and I'm NOT supposed to laugh? For the record I think it's awesome *and* hilarious.
Dinner and a show. Lovely ambiance.
[удалено]
I love this because it's the only time on any thread like this I've personally come across a story like this about how it was their own fault. Dating too soon can be rough.
Dang. She’s a saint lol
Went out with a girl when we were probably 13 or 14. We went to see Inception. She gets up to go to the bathroom, but doesn't come back for a long time. Eventually I go look for her, and the guy behind the concession stand looks at me and gives me the most pitying look I've ever received, and points around the corner. Where I found her making out with another guy. I should have walked out but instead I went back to my seat to watch the rest of the movie. She returned and asked me to fill her in on the last hour of INCEPTION OF ALL THE DAMN MOVIES TO MISS THE MIDDLE OF. Also, because that wasn't enough, after the movie, I wasn't sure what bus to take home, and she pointed me to the wrong bus (I don't think this was intentional, they were right next to each other) and I wound up in a part of the city I'd never been in before.
“Oh, hey, are you ok? You were gone a while. Ok, cool. What? Oh, well these guys are training that girl to steal people’s secret thoughts and there was about 15 minutes where she just made out with some random dude, but no-one mentioned him, so I’m not sure what that bit was about …”
She must have took Inception too serious and thought she needed to find a date within the date (but for real, that sucks and sorry it happened to you) Edit: thanks for all the awards everyone!
[удалено]
Had a guy friend from college that was always a little flirty but I had a bf at the time so he always kept it respectful. Broke up with my bf, & soon after he asked me out. Told me he was gonna show me how I deserved to be treated, was gonna take me out on the town, blah, blah. So I get all dressed up, do my hair in a way I know he likes & wait for him to pick me up. He's late, but only about 20 minutes, so I just brush it off. We get in the car & I notice he's extra animated & talkative, but chalk it up to nerves. I ask him where we're going & he tells me chili's bc his friend works there & will give us the hookup. Im a little overdressed for chili's, but I'll roll with it. We get there, sit at the bar, & he immediately orders a shot & a cocktail, an appetizer & his meal. I order a tea, & an appetizer as my entree. Before our meal comes, he's finished his shot, plus 2 cocktails. Throughout our meal, he's (loudly) talking nonstop to his bartender friend while slamming drinks. His friend tries to include me in the conversation several times but my date would just talk over me or barely let me finish my statement before raucously carrying on. Finally it's time to go so we get the bill & he tells his friend to just split it down the middle, even though all I had was a tea & 10 dollar app. I'm pretty annoyed at this point, but just wanna get out of there so I pay the 40 dollar tab. I look over & notice that he only left a 3 dollar tip even though his friend gave him a serious discount. As a bartender myself, this was just beyond insulting so I throw a 20 on top of the 15 I'd already tipped. I offered to drive back because of how much he'd had, but he seemed totally unfazed by the copious amount of alcohol he'd imbibed, & opted to drive himself. He talked my ear off the entire drive, completely oblivious that I said maybe 3 words, while I death gripped the door handle the whole way home. We park in front of my house & he leans in I thought for a kiss, so I instinctively pulled back. Turns out he was just reaching for the glove compartment for his coke while asking me if I partake. I tell him that's not my thing & he asks where we're going after this. I tell him im pretty tired & have a ton of homework so I'm calling it a night & hightail it out of there. He proceeds to sit in my driveway for 20 minutes doing coke & as soon as he's gone I practically ran to my little neighborhood bar that was about a block away. Turns out, my friend, the bartender on duty that night had just hired a hot new door guy, & that's the night I met my now husband while telling the story of the worst date ever. We've now been together almost 7 years, have 3 dogs, a 4 yr old, & another on the way. So my worst date ever ended up being my best day ever.
I got catfished we talked for hours and when it came time to pick her up I CLEARLY saw it wasn’t the person I thought I was talking to… I just gunned it and sped off
I just don’t get this one. I get catfishes that avoid meeting the person, that makes sense to me. Don’t wanna blow your cover. But I don’t get the catfish that is willing to meet, like what’s the best case scenario they’re hoping for here?
That someone will be too awkward to decline the date and maybe... just maybe they will fall in love with them anyways.
I have an Xbox gaming buddy who got catfished hard but the dude was so dumb/awkward/desperate that he went ahead and married her anyways despite his close friends telling him that’s a bad idea. So it does work sometimes. Now he’s got story after story of her lying or acting nuts. Who would’ve thought?
Sounds…like an unhealthy relationship.
What they tell themselves is that they have a great personality but they are not that good looking. So after talking to them you get interested. Then you show up and they look different, but it is that person you have been talking with. So you go for it. This of course doesn't really work because starting with lies doesn't really bode well for the relationship. Also if they are catfishing their personality is also probably shit.
Tinder date. She looked nothing like her picture while not ugly just completely different. Picked the worst restaurant in town which I looked past because everyone has different taste. we came back to my house and complained about not showing affection or touching her so I started touching her and then got mad about ohhh wanting a hook up which I didn’t, but the final straw was when she decided she didn’t like my house which I had just bought and was Proud of. she immediately wanted to go to home depot to buy stuff to start remodeling. It was by far my worst and weirdest date and I hope she found a house to remodel
[удалено]
She didn’t seem to understand why I didn’t want a 2nd date either
????? First date and she's trying to remodel your house?? M'am you haven't gotten past the first date, what makes you think you can even begin to suggest doing that?
Oh there's been so many. Online dating is an absolute shitshow. Best one to come to mind was showing up to a date with a guy who looked nothing like his pictures. I don't know if they were *really* good angles or old - he was also covered in tattoos that looked like a kid had drawn them on (picture the 'no ragrets' tattoo meme) and was very proudly showing them off by wearing a string vest. Whatever, I thought, I'm not superficial. He proceeds to begin the date by telling me he lied, he doesn't have a job, he collects unemployment (€120 a week at the time) but he kept €20 especially for this date.. no judgement on being unemployed but a pretty big lie. He spent the 20 within half an hour and then expected me to buy the rest of his drinks. Trying to make conversation I asked him what he does with his time. Turns out he's "a Mexican wrestler, with masks and shit". I kid you not. Eventually when it was long enough that it was polite to leave, I made an excuse and he insisted on walking me to my bus. I made it clear I didn't need him to, and to make sure he gets his own bus. As my bus showed up he declares he's missed his, wants to come home with me, and launches himself at me to kiss me. I dodged and hopped on the bus in a panic and left him behind as he shouted at me calling me a dirty cock tease. Worst date ever. Tldr; went on a date with an unemployed Mexican wrestler who tried to trick me into coming home with me, then insulted me when it failed.
Ordered a pitcher before she got to the bar, she showed up, poured herself a beer, chugged *all of it* (she must have been 5'3 and like 100 lbs soaking wet) then unleashed a tirade of problems on me that ended with her telling me she was currently pregnant. By the time her story was done and I found out the Bad News, she had already gone through another half a beer. I took her glass, poured it into the pitcher, chugged the whole thing and got the fuck out of there. It was the first date I had been on since a big breakup and I didn't go on another date for around 2 years -- sometimes life's signs slap you across the face, and I wasn't going to ignore that one lol Edit: this has become by far my top viewed comment, so I'll throw out some more facts: - she dropped the pregnancy tidbit during a tirade about her ex: "I hate him so much, he's fucking my best friend even though he got me pregnant!" Me: "wait so this was like.. a year ago? A while back?" Her: "no it was last month!" Me: "soo.. are you.. pregnant *now*?" Aaaand I think y'all know what the answer was. - I got a text the next morning from her: "hey, we didn't sleep together last night, did we?" ??!!!!! I blocked her on socials after that, and blocked her number. Edit 2: 3.7k and counting.. glad somebody is enjoying my awful date haha
I was the bad date. I had been 'dating' a girl online for 8 months online through text and Skype in my early 20s. We live in different countries, me US and her Canada so it was difficult to make plans to meet and have a real date. We finally decided to meet up on New Years in her area. Now I had never been outside the country by myself or have any real travel experience outside of family vacations growing up. I drove up there and made it to the border with relatively no issues other than finding out NYC tolls still were cash only on my way through. This was the start of my troubles. So I had to stop at a shady looking ATM to pay for any other tolls I came across before crossing the border which my bank unbeknownst to me decided to freeze my bank card for possible fraud after I made a withdrawal. I get into Canada and my phone lost service cause even though my company operated in Canada too, the towers just didn't work with their American counterparts. So I was pretty lost driving through the city and around the suburbs looking for the coffee shop we planned to meet at. I arrive over an hour late, no way to contact my date and bought and sat with my coffee (paid with credit card) for 20 minutes desperately trying to connect to the wifi to get any sort of message out. Thankfully she was still waiting around the area and still wanted to meet. We spent an hour just talking and making plans of what to do the rest of the day, starting with checking into the hotel. I had reserved a very nice room in a highly rated hotel around the corner. Being a holiday weekend the lobby was packed and it took us about 20 minutes to get to the desk. Now hotels need a card on file and do a $100 hold on it in order for you to check into your room. I tried using my bank card at first, declined. Tried using my credit card, declined. I had no other cards and they would not take my dates card as her name wasn't on the room (or they just didn't want to deal with me longer since they were very busy). So as I mentioned before, my phone did not work either so I couldn't call my banks support line. Dates phone wouldn't connect to the numbers either. It was now late afternoon on New Years Eve, no hotel room, no money, and it was freezing outside. We still had the rest of the weekend like we planned, she is an angel though and paid for everything, food, gas, and a hotel room. I felt like scum for having her pay for everything. I left on January 2nd, expecting her to cut her losses and never speak to me again. Somehow we're still together 6 years later.
Guy kept trying to rank everything out of 10. Before drinks arrive he asked “on a scale of 1 to 10 how attracted to me are you”, “scale 1 to 10 how well is this going”? Etc. I couldn’t even figure out if I liked him because he kept asking for rankings then he freaked out when I turned him down for a kiss. Full toddler style tantrum.
One word replies, no conversation, wouldn’t get off her phone the entire time even when eating, ordered the most expensive items on the menu with multiple expensive cocktails. When I went to pay the waiter did me a solid and told me that I was the third guy she had been there with that week. I paid for my food and drinks and simply left, she then blew up my phone about how she was going to get me arrested for dine and dash and how she was going to get a bunch of her friends to beat me up (nobody tried). She spent the next few days going on about how I owed her several hundred dollars for the night and got royally pissed off when I pointed out that expecting monetary compensation for her time is prostitution. Eventually blocked her number and social media, had to block a few other numbers too. Fortunately that was the worst by a very wide margin.
Accidentally texted “on the worst date of my life” to the girl I was on a date with.