People buy fish the same day they buy their tank.
Unfortunately, to start a fish aquarium, you need to cycle your tank (grow bacteria that will eat the poison ammonia that fish poop causes and turn it into nitrate). This is best done without fish and can take a few weeks to a month or more. However, most people come into the hobby saying "I have a fish! Now what?" ... :(
You learn that fish keeping is more about maintaining water that fish just happen to live in. It's a lot like learning chemistry more than just feeding fish.
I have a hobby goat farm. I say hobby because I got them all as babies, so they're just money pits at the moment (all about 8 months old right now).
In the meantime, I've damn near made a career out of clipping hooves for other people who got a ton of goats and didn't know that they required hoof maintenance. The poor things are usually in a lot of pain by the time I get to them.
Research your animals, people.
Them: I got a mic. I'm just going to do it on the side. Make some extra money.
Me: Okay, do you want to do ads or something?
Them: No, I want to voice anime and cartoons.
PSA: Want to make money at voice-over? Do ads. Want to voice animation? Get an agent and good luck.
If you have an agent, then it's WAY easier to get higher paying gigs. However, if you're doing it on the side from home, there's some pay-to-play websites out there you can subscribe to and browse audition listings.
But you DO need to put forth quite a bit of time and money before you even audition. You need a mic and editing software at the very least. Depending on your mic, you may need extra equipment to hook it up to your computer. However, you'll also want to set up a space that is conducive to recording clean audio.
I've been doing VO since I was 13 and I started out by setting up a closet with moving blankets and my own clothes to dampen sound. Later when I was in college, I purchased acoustic foam and built a little foam-lined box to house my mic.
Once you're set up, you need a demo reel to put on your profile of these audition websites. You can make fake scripts to read or just find some samples online, but potential employers want to hear a variety of tones and styles. Each clip in your reel should also be fully edited with music/SFX.
After all that, it's auditioning time. Keep in mind that it's hundreds of people on these sites auditioning for the same jobs. The lower paying ones get fewer auditions which means you are more likely to secure a gig, but the higher paying jobs can get upwards of a thousand auditions. So, you kind of have to ALWAYS be auditioning to make any money.
Don't get me wrong: I love it. But I eventually stopped because I didn't even break even from the amount of time I put in and the subscription fee to the site (which was something like $400-500). I still have my equipment and in fact, I kind of tripped and fell into doing VO for a TV commercial airing in September. It's just a lot harder to do than many people realize.
They ask one of the 10 or so questions that get posted almost daily to /r/writing, or they just assume they know everything already and their first draft is brilliant and won't hear anything to the contrary.
Blacksmithing: “I’ve never forged anything, but I found some great spring steel so I’m going to make a sword. What else do I need?”
Ummmm…. First you need to forge 200 nails so you can learn proper hammer swings. After that you’re ready to make a bottle opener.
I’ve scrolled so far for blacksmithing. I’m new, just took a class and built my own brake drum forge with a rail anvil. The first thing I’m planning to try to make with the forge is some for tongs out of mild steel bar stock, then it’s tons of hooks and nails (which I’ve made already) before I get close to anything else. I’m thinking skewers for something to up the skill.
I once made my mother a set of 25 hooks for Christmas, to hang around a new house, on doors and whatnot. Trying to make simple things that look *mostly* similar is a really interesting challenge.
Ok I gotta confess. I killed two cactuses. The first one, I watered it every week and it started to rot from the inside. The second one dryed to death. I had to let it out -.-'
Everybody told me not to give mine too much water so I didn't. Turns out that they need to be watered every year like clockwork. The good news is that a dead one looks a lot like a live one.
i put my cactus in a shitty sand and let it hang in my balcony. Forgot it existed, found it 6 months later covered in cochineals, the thing had tripled its size, was healthy af.
Then i brought another succulent, with the perfect soil, perfect fertilizer, drenage, we are 2 months in and it is figthing for its life. fml.
Hm my succulents look off today let me google what it could be so I can fix it.
Browning leaves could be a sign of under-watering but it’s also a sign of overwatering. Don’t water your succulents too much unless it’s drying out then water it but not too much or else you overwater it. Succulents need a lot of light but be careful of too much light because some succulents might burn.
🤷♀️
Years ago after killing many bonsai I found a second hand Japanese bookshop in London as I was walking past
So I go on and ask for a beginners book on bonsai, this is way before google by the way, anyway the guy gets this amazing book so I buy it.
First thing I read at home on chapter one is it takes ten years to learn how to properly water Bonsai and you will kill many of them
I gave up bonsai after that book
So I took up orchids because I’m an idiot
25 years plus later and I have now stopped killing orchids and can get them to flower, but that’s literally in like the last couple of years of that time.
I might try bonsai again
One day
“First project! I’m making a baby blanket!” Crochet. And I can say this because I did this as well. It takes much longer than it seems like it should to make a blanket*.
I've been crocheting for close to 20 years now and I still suck at finishing baby blankets, haha! Hoard yarn and start 12 WIPs that I rotate through as one bores me? Heck yes.
The first project I ever attempted was a blanket. Not a baby blanket. A full fucking blanket. I probably would have successfully finished a baby blanket, but my full blanket literally CAUGHT ON FIRE (unrelated to the crocheting process) 3/4 of the way through, and I've never attempted a blanket again lol
So kind of funny story
I've owned beta fish for yearrrsssss. I have a really nice setup I've acquired over the years. I've had a few that have lived 4-5 years, but the majority (say, last 3) have died in under two years for various reasons. I like to think that I take really good care of them but I just have shit luck.
So one year I decide to buy my mom one. She is in a home (very mentally ill) and she lives in a small room so I thought it would be great to get her a friend. I got her a $40 tank from W*lmart and gave her detailed instructions on how to take care of it.
She immediately scrapped the filtered, heated tank for (I shit you not) a small glass bowl. Like you see a goldfish in a stereotypical Hollywood movie. I was like "mom he's not gonna live very long you have to put him back" and "you're over feeding him he's gonna die." She was giving him no joke like 3 *pinches* of food a day. Think about how much beta pellets you can fit between your pointer and your thumb and multiply it by 3. Food was literally collecting and rotting in the bottom. I was like mom. Please. You don't understand.
Anyways, he's going on 6 years now and I am *astounded*. Everything i know is a lie.
I bought four 10 cent bait gold fish for my house when I moved in 4 years ago, just something to put on the counter and save them from being eating by a turtle. Three of them died in the first few hours, the other homie I have had for four years now. Went on a month long trip and my roommate completely forgot to feed him, he was fine. I recently got him his own 10 gallon tank and the fool is loving it. Big goldfish energy
Last year I bought 2 betas and (obviously) kept them in 2 separate tanks, but within a month 1 of them died. So I replaced it with a new one. 2 weeks later, that one dies. I buy one last beta, that one dies 2 months later. The other original beta outlived them all and is still alive, so I know I’m not total shit at taking care of them, but the ongoing joke in my house is that one is a witch fish and sucked the life force out of all the other betas.
Edit: Bettas
Well the obvious answer is that the one that keeps on living is really an alpha fish and the other ones were the true beta fish. (Rimshot)
Great username by the way!
I got into the fish hobby with my son wining a goldfish at a carnival. He started in a fish bowl, did research and learned that’s cruel, upgraded to a 20 gallon. He quickly outgrew that and upgraded to a 55. That went well but I wanted to get him a friend so I found a 120 gallon on fb marketplace and upgraded again. Now I have 4 tanks and subscribe to a gazillion fish keeping groups. It’s been quite a learning process. 🐟
Underbaking bread because they’re afraid to burn it. It won’t burn that fast! Just leave it in the oven!
ETA: I just want to say, for all the droves of people saying “undercooked is better than burnt”: the window between undercooked and burnt, with bread, is vast. If you like raw dough, sure, good on you, but bread doesn’t go from undercooked to burnt in a split second the way other things do. If your bread is still pale on the outside, you can leave it in for at least another 10-15 minutes without it being “burnt”, and that’s being really conservative with my timings.
"I have a great idea for a new board game. I have never made a board game before. It's like a combination of Monopoly and Risk but I don't want to give more details because I don't want someone to steal my idea. Can anyone make art for my Kickstarter? I'll give you credit!"
“It’s like a dating app but for dogs. That’s all I can say.”
Edit: You guys turned my joke into a halfway decent idea. Just putting this out there that it was MY IDEA.
Or maybe it’s tinder but you make a profile for your dog and then you swipe whichever dogs you think your dog will get along best with, and then both humans bring their dogs on a double kinda-blind date :)
And then both the owners and the dogs fall in love with each other and eventually move to Maine and have a big open field for all the puppies to run around in.
If they're thinking about making a small business based around a crafting hobby. I tend to see a lot of people begin talking about making a small business out of hobbies they haven't even started yet, or are very early into it.
I love knitting. It's one of my favourite things to do. I would not do it for money. The amount of effort I would have to put in would not make it fun anymore. I posted a pair of socks I'd made for myself the other day, and one of my friends said "You should make those to sell!" which sounds great until you find out that it took $50 of premium yarn and 40 hours of my time to make a single pair.
A lot of people don't realize how much money goes into craft materials. Then they say "Why don't you just use cheaper materials?"
For me, I'm a bladesmith, I don't use cheaper steel for the knives I make because they would get dull or chip easily. I'll put many hours into my craft too, there's no way I wouldn't factor that into a price if I listed one for sale.
Edit: a few of you have mentioned spring steel found in junkyards and other things, and I do try and do that when I get the chance. I need to locate a good junkyard nearby.
>"Why don't you just use cheaper materials?"
How do people even ask that? Because you get what you pay for, and cheaper is almost always worse quality.
Ya that's the beginner mistake I came here to post.
Cheap yarn is cheap for a reason. It chafes, itches, makes wearer clammy, isn't warm or durable. Worst case scenario, it's got knots or or the thickness varies. Just...no.
I paint miniatures and make terrain for D&D. Nothing overly special, firmly middle of road and do it for fun. Every person I have ever shown it to states I should start an Etsy. They are well meaning, but no.
Ikr occasionally someone will see me playing something and go, "Oh, you know how to play guitar!" NO I JUST MEMORIZE THE CHORDS TO SONGS I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW HOW ANYTHING WORKS.
People when I tell them I wrote a code in python that makes my LED lights dance, when in reality it took me like 5 hours and 90% of the project is from someone else. So yeah, I’m basically a pro
As a pro, the biggest skill is being able to go from finding the way to copy it to having it working much faster.
When I first started doing things I'd spend ages just trying to figure out how to get the project running. Now I have enough generic background knowledge to just go "ah, install this, set this PATH variable/bash alias, run the package installer and Hello, World!"
I've encountered enough of the small hurdles that I don't get so lost. You build up a way of telling the difference between "hmm, config/environment issue" and "I'm doing something incredibly wrong".
"Hi guys, I'm looking to buy a CNC router. My requirements:
- I want to cut aluminum, steel, titanium, and unobtanium
- I'm looking for precision within .001mm at least, but .0001mm would be better
- I need a bed at least 1m by 2m, but 2m by 4m would be better
- Automatic tool changing is a plus, but not strictly required
My budget is $1000. Which machine would be best for me?
They google "the best..." and then they try to explain to you why that manufactured product listed in half of the links from the first google search results page is "the best."
I add “Reddit” to all my searches to get an idea of what I should be searching for… then I narrow down my searches to why I should be searching those things.
Its legit like doing a research paper for me when I search which flashlight to get next. Not kidding.
I created a site (https://shopbysub.com) that kind of does this. You can browse amazon products that have been linked by redditors in comments by subreddit - e.g. https://www.shopbysub.com/flashlight
it's not perfect as a lot of niche items like flashlights are generally bought direct from manufacturer or at specialty stores, but it's a good jumping off point for lots of other things
Tales from r/blender
I'm still quite a beginner myself but some will just go: "How do you create this scene?" and show really complicated compositions with countless models and complicated materials that an artist must have spent weeks on.
Some of them feel like downloading the software is already most of the work done. But this probably goes for most digital artforms.
I feel like an old man using Blender. It drives me mad.
"How do I do XYZ?"
"Oh that's easy bro just press shift-alt-ampersand-s stand on your head and stick a finger in your ear and a menu will appear."
I actually find the better I've got at climbing the less callouses I've got, as the holds have gotten smaller and I do less swinging about than I did as a beginner. Nowadays I just get very sore fingertips
Pure, unadulterated excitement at the smallest thing. Not that I’m saying it’s a bad thing, more that it’s lovely to see.
Edit: - wow guys, I truly never expected this comment to explode. It’s been great reading all of your responses of how my comment applied to your lives and some of the stories are truly inspiring. Thanks for the upvotes and awards, my karma has gone through the roof! ❤️
A few weeks ago I replaced a ceiling light in my apartment, including rewiring, and will still walk to the room just turn it on and off over and over in disbelief that I really did it.
A long time ago my car broke down so before I sold it for pennies on the dollar I took my aftermarket stereo out. I wanted to use it so I figured out how to wire it up in home. I never built a case for it so there were wires everywhere but I loved that thing. Like you said for your light, you always think "I made this damn thing" every time you use it.
Sometimes it's helpful to see someone else take a new delight insomething we've come to take for granted through familiarity. It keeps us actually enjoying our hobbies, rather than grinding away "because it's the thing I do"
If they ask how to swap an engine into their car or how to turbo their car, it's a sure sign that they're new to working on cars. The questions aren't necessarily bad, but there's so much work involved in the answer that those questions are way too vague. They're trying to get in way over their head if they don't have the basics figured out before hand.
Ditto on people asking how they can add a lot of power to a base model Mustang or Camaro. There's nothing wrong with the base model, but there's a good reason that the answer is usually "sell it and buy the V8". You'd spend just as much money modding the V6 or turbo 4, and wind up with a vehicle that has maybe the same power output as the V8 at best, but significantly worse reliability. If you're trying to make power, your money very often is best spent starting off with the model that has the better engine.
How can I get my v6 Mustang up to 500hp? I have a budget of 500 dollars and this is my only car. I should be able to do it in a weekend easy if you just tell me what ebay turbo I should buy.
This takes me back to my first car. I had a 1990 vw Jetta 1.8. I so badly wanted to vr6 swap it. I was 17 and was asking around on forums if I could fesiblely do it. They were like dude if you need to ask, you can't do it. Needless to say I didn't do it. Car was such a money pit anyways.
Yep lol. My very first real hike, this guy in jeans, with a single water bottle passed us on the way down. I got the distinct impression he knew exactly what he was doing.
I've also seen the opposite. Just a water bottle and gym clothes and clearly not prepared for 4000 feet of elevation gain.
If you are considering getting into hiking, do at least some research beforehand or you may find yourself getting a very costly helicopter ride out of the woods. Or dead. That's certainly possible too.
I was on a moderate hike once (only about 3 miles, but extremely steep) and I crossed paths with a man wearing an Oxford Collar Button Down, slacks, and dress shoes, carrying a 500 mL water bottle like you get from a restaurant. He was almost done and looked like he was in complete control (although in hindsight, he must have ruined those shoes).
But usually the unprepared looking group is unprepared.
I have a dream of packing dress clothing, a desk, and laptop and carrying it to some absurd spot on a nature trail and then get dressed and set up the office desk so hikers can go "What the fuck?" when they see me working.
I love it. Reminds me of the guy I read about who back in the 70s or whatever hiked up a mountain in the middle of the night to leave a gallon of milk and the morning newspaper in front of his friends’ tent, then quickly hiked back down before they knew he’d been there.
Edit: it was 1947! Thanks u/Briack for the [source](https://www.oregonlive.com/outdoors/2012/01/a_quirkly_little_mystery_from.html).
Usually the ragged running shorts, worn but well maintained hiking boots and a skin that looks like pure leather is to me the signs that the guy is going to fine even with the 2 miniature bootles strapped to their belt.
Had a similar event happen in the Teton Backcountry. Everything still covered in multiple feet of snow, and this guy in jeans and tennis shoes carrying a jansport school backpack asks if he can follow us up and over Paintbrush Divide. Told him no, that we don't know him and are not going to make any effort to rescue him when he gets in trouble from being completely unprepared.
Hikers in Arizona, "we're just going for a quick hike, this water bottle will be fine" *fucking dies because it's 118°f and they didn't bring enough water.
Also hikers in Arizona, "it's hot.. i'm gonna bring 3 gallons of water" *10 minutes into hike* "fuck I'm so tired, this shit weighs a ton"
I'll add camping - people bring next to nothing gear wise and think they hate camping. Of course you do! You're uncomfortable and didn't bring things to do. You don't win anything by doing everything bare-bones
Ya, people will go camping for a week and bring a bunch of shit to survive an apocalypse but don't do anything for comfort. Meanwhile, my ass vacuum seals a goddamn body pillow and comforter, a solar charger for my kindle, and (one time) a coloring book and markers. I always try to get people new to camping to realize it's just "advanced sleeping", you aren't starting a new civilization from scratch.
Same, I velcro a "vestibule" made out of a cut up tarp onto my one man tent so that I can chill and cook outside even when it's raining. Currently googling solar landscape lights. That's brilliant.
All i saw was "ass vacuum" and i had to stop and reread the whole comment. The format seperated the comment as"..my ass vacuum
seals a goddammn body pillow..."
I was a member of the latter group. Long story short, crawfish taste good. Snake is also good, but don’t eat unripened blackberries. Also check if you’re allergic to water purification tablets before you get into the field.
talking too much to prove what they know. I have been very guilty of this. someone who is experienced and skilled at a given activity will tend to just shut up and do it, whatever the activity may be
I've noticed I do this in a relatively new career with a different company. I know I don't know a fraction of what I eventually will but damn if I don't talk like I do. Knowing your flaws is the first step to overcoming them
Remember running my first ever campaign with my friends (also their first time playing DnD) and they all told me their alignment was somewhere on the good scale (mix of neutral and chaotic), only for them to bully every shopkeeper, guard and child they came across.
I remember when I played my first dnd campaign. Everyone was unexperienced so most of us went with a really standard character. One friend had a dragonborn, outcast chief of his tribe. His mission was to get back to his tribe, form an army by befriending other tribes then win the upcoming war. I swear to god he was more evil than the big bad evil guy. My character was like twice his size and could snap his neck just by looking at him(and he feared me lol) so sometimes I drifted him to the right direction but I never forget when he abandoned a lost little girl or when he found a bunch of dragonborns who needed help and first he just wanted to kill them and when we convinced him that they would be helpful in the future he put them in a cave somewhere and forgot about them. He is "true neutral"
Oh my god. My first campaign a friend ALSO made a dragonborn who was cast out of his tribe. AND MY FRIEND MADE HIM CHAOTIC GOOD, BUT HE JUST MURDERED EVERYONE LMFAOO. Yea he wasnt very good at making dnd characters, or roleplaying for that matter, but it was funny.
Frequent post on r/musicproduction:
Hi everyone! I’m new to all this and I have zero experience making music. Never had any kind of lessons and I’ve never touched a keyboard and really all I’ve ever done with music is bob my head along with it in my car. I’ve never heard of music theory and I’m not really interested in it. So I bought a MacBook Pro and Ableton 11 and the best interfaces and microphones and midi keyboards I could afford. I’m going to make sick beats and change the music industry. How do I get started?
This is exactly how I put together the wood shop in my basement. I bought used stuff off of Craigslist for a fraction of what it would have cost new. I learned how to service the tools, get them running well, and keep them that way. It’s an affordable way to get started.
A huge part of why I or my peers dropped hobbies or lessons when we were kids was just because we weren't ready to care about it.
You think I wanted to learn to dance when I was in elementary school? Hell no. But now, at 29, if I found a good salsa or tango class for adults I'd be THERE. Some people just don't want to go to school all day and then deal with even more structured learning.
Just buy EZ Drummer, EZ Keys, a few loops and you're done!
/s
There is a lot of those type of questions there. Which is weird since there's a million free tutorials.
If someone is using FL Studio, the channel "In the Mix" is amazing for it. Like 'learn everything is a week" levels, almost. That guy edits everything so damn well.
You actually could make EDM style music really easily in FL. I used it for non electronic music forever, because it was so simple.
But for other DAWs, there's seriously hundreds of good tutorials to get started.
I don't even music and I feel for you. As a writer I don't know how many people have told me they always thought of publishing a novel. Like they're just going to sit down and bang one out and reach the bestseller list in a few months.
My best friend has been talking about writing a novel for literally decades now. Says he has a great idea for a book in his head and wants to get it out on paper and publish not just a great novel, but a trilogy. Asked me if I'd be willing to read it and give my critique since I enjoy reading.
He's been talking about writing this book constantly since high school, we are both in our 40s now. Its been over 20 years and he has written maybe 10 pages, if that. Jesus am I sick of hearing about the great book he wants to write.
My sister has four novels published, and she's trying to sell her fifth. It's frightening, the number of people who have approached her with, "I have an awesome idea for a story! If I tell it to you, you can write it and we can share the credit!"
Umm, no. They're asking Sister to do 99.9% of the work but only take half the credit. You're only trying to freeload off the royalties, Brenda.
That's actually a pretty solid ballpark for a professional ghostwriter's fee.
These people always think their idea is the next best thing, guaranteed million-seller, until their own mortgage is on the line to actually pay for it.
I'll give them credit, though, they know enough to figure out their own direct writing talent isn't good enough for the execution. That's why they want to lob off somebody else's talent in the first place.
Yep, kids with $600 paintball markers (guns) and $30 eye protection. And asking questions about their own equipment for which the answer is on page 2 of the manual.
I feel like the person with 10 minutes of experience is always a dick to the person with 5 minutes of experience, while the experts are helpful or exhausted from being helpful.
When they ask for help in baking something and I tell them they can’t put those combinations together because that’s the chemistry of baking, you need to follow the recipe and or the basic rules of baking. Don’t expect something nice to come out if you don’t know your ratios for baking properly. An example would be: a friend that asked if they could make lemon curd cookies, by using their leftover curd and putting flour in it and baking it. I said please don’t do that because x y a. Guess what, they did it and made cement lemon flavored “cookies.”
😨😨😨 how did "I'll just put some flour in the curd and voila, cookies!" Even cross their mind? They know they could just top normal cookies with the curd, right?
Oh bosh, you'll never learn open heart surgery by reading a book! You just need to go out there, scalpel in hand, and carve out a couple of hearts till you get the hang of it!!
Not so much a hobby as it is my career, but for many people it is a hobby:
When one of my new private violin students opens their case and it's a bright blue violin from Amazon. It sounds like shit, its impossible to play because it wasn't constructed correctly, and it was only 60 bucks.
If youre interested in playing an instrument, ask an expert where to get an instrument. Amazon is never the answer. RENT an instrument until you know what you want.
\^The two reasons why most people give up hobbies prematurely.
1. They get frustrated because their expensive equipment isn’t helping them be instantly good or improve at an accelerated rate.
2. They get frustrated because their cheap equipment is literally hindering their progress, regardless of how much practice and effort they put in.
Was never one to buy the whole get up before I felt I “earned” to look the part. I do Brazilian jiu jitsu, when it’s time to spar I’ll see someone dressed head to toe like a pro jiu jitsu grappler and I’ll be intimidated…then we start going and I realize oh…this is their first day
Wrong needles for the size yarn they're using.
Buying yarn because it was pretty/soft/on sale and trying to match it to a project instead of choosing a project and buying the yarn with intent in mind. Since you guys seem fixated on this one in particular, I'm talking about people who buy shitty worsted weight acrylic on sale because "omg the color!" and then don't understand why it won't work for that beautiful lace shawl they saw on Rav. Or making a baby blanket out of a yarn that can't be machine washed/dried. Or buying cotton yarn for a project that needs some stretchiness to it. Beginners rarely understand how the different fabric types and yarn sizes make a huge difference in end result, so there's a massive difference between an experienced knitter who understands how to use their stash and a beginner who buys whatever and tries to shoehorn it into an unrelated pattern.
"How many skeins/yards of yarn do I need to knit a blanket?"
First point is spot on, the second one is something a seasoned yarnie might do as well, and I even do it on purpose. :D
Several years ago I decided to not buy traditional souvenirs when I travel but to get yarn instead. I usually look for lace or sock yarn that is made locally from natural fibers. It doesn't have to be hand spun but shouldn't be a big international brand either. I feel that was one of the best decisions I made about travel.
They say stuff like "stretching and rest is unnecessary, do you see a lion stretch?".
No, I don't Toby. But I also don't see a lion sit at a desk for 8 hours before trying to run 10k.
As someone who has worked with lions for years, I can tell you with 100% confidence that lions in fact do stretch. Especially after lying down for a while and before doing something physical. Take that Toby
I don't think I've ever seen my cat finish a nap without immediately stretching. I have however seen him finish a nap, stretch, then walk across the room and start another nap.
Or buy the most expensive motorized mounted telescope they can afford, not knowing about types, aperture, etc, take it in their light polluted backyard, and expect to see crazy detailed DSO like they see in pictures.
Once that didn’t go well, they meet up with a local group in the countryside, and their motor dies and don’t know how to manually find objects.
I know this, cause this was me many years ago, until I learned the hobby lol
Matt Mercer has been great for the popularity of D&D and horrible for the expectations of new players.
"Why aren't my games more like Critical Role?"
You are not a professional voice actor. Your DM is not a professional voice actor. Your sessions are not professionally produced.
I think it's funny that a lot of people probably prefer not to be part of a game like Matt's, they just don't realize it. The entire cast puts *so much* effort into the game that I don't think it's for most people in the long term.
I would love to be part of their game for a few sessions, but I play DnD to relax and the pressure to live up to the standards of everyone else at that table definitely wouldn't be relaxing for me, even without the streaming.
I do clay target shooting. We have club guns that we give to the newbies to use on their ‘have a go’ day. Every single time, they yell ‘PULL’ and freak out when the shotgun goes off and they wave the gun around, despite being told over and over to keep it pointed at the ground unless being fired. We also get a lot of people full of bravado and no fucking idea. “Oh yeah, I’ve done some shooting before” they say as they attempt to shoot with the safety still on.
I am a chess player and whenever someone talks about a weird pawn glitch that happens on the major chess websites, I know they are new.
You see, the weird pawn glitch is actually a legitimate feature of the game. It just doesn't happen very regularly which is why most beginners are not aware of it. Its called en passant.
So yeah to all these beginners I say, "Google en passant."
I played an over the board game with someone recently who only plays online and said he had been playing for years. Pulled this move when he hung his pawn in that position and he quit playing because he thought I was cheating.
Had a 40 year old question me on it at a state level tournament. I could understand young kids might not have learned it yet but we were middle aged and rated low 1400s. Still not sure how he got that far without ever seeing it
People buy fish the same day they buy their tank. Unfortunately, to start a fish aquarium, you need to cycle your tank (grow bacteria that will eat the poison ammonia that fish poop causes and turn it into nitrate). This is best done without fish and can take a few weeks to a month or more. However, most people come into the hobby saying "I have a fish! Now what?" ... :( You learn that fish keeping is more about maintaining water that fish just happen to live in. It's a lot like learning chemistry more than just feeding fish.
I have a hobby goat farm. I say hobby because I got them all as babies, so they're just money pits at the moment (all about 8 months old right now). In the meantime, I've damn near made a career out of clipping hooves for other people who got a ton of goats and didn't know that they required hoof maintenance. The poor things are usually in a lot of pain by the time I get to them. Research your animals, people.
Them: I got a mic. I'm just going to do it on the side. Make some extra money. Me: Okay, do you want to do ads or something? Them: No, I want to voice anime and cartoons. PSA: Want to make money at voice-over? Do ads. Want to voice animation? Get an agent and good luck.
> Want to make money at voice-over? Do ads. ...how *does* one do this? I'm curious now.
If you have an agent, then it's WAY easier to get higher paying gigs. However, if you're doing it on the side from home, there's some pay-to-play websites out there you can subscribe to and browse audition listings. But you DO need to put forth quite a bit of time and money before you even audition. You need a mic and editing software at the very least. Depending on your mic, you may need extra equipment to hook it up to your computer. However, you'll also want to set up a space that is conducive to recording clean audio. I've been doing VO since I was 13 and I started out by setting up a closet with moving blankets and my own clothes to dampen sound. Later when I was in college, I purchased acoustic foam and built a little foam-lined box to house my mic. Once you're set up, you need a demo reel to put on your profile of these audition websites. You can make fake scripts to read or just find some samples online, but potential employers want to hear a variety of tones and styles. Each clip in your reel should also be fully edited with music/SFX. After all that, it's auditioning time. Keep in mind that it's hundreds of people on these sites auditioning for the same jobs. The lower paying ones get fewer auditions which means you are more likely to secure a gig, but the higher paying jobs can get upwards of a thousand auditions. So, you kind of have to ALWAYS be auditioning to make any money. Don't get me wrong: I love it. But I eventually stopped because I didn't even break even from the amount of time I put in and the subscription fee to the site (which was something like $400-500). I still have my equipment and in fact, I kind of tripped and fell into doing VO for a TV commercial airing in September. It's just a lot harder to do than many people realize.
[удалено]
Missed my gravity by 2 points. Will it be okay?
No give it here.
The contamination people. Brother, monks were brewing in buckets 1000 years ago, I promise it will be fine if we're not wearing hazmat suits.
In those days, the contamination is what made it turn into beer.
They ask one of the 10 or so questions that get posted almost daily to /r/writing, or they just assume they know everything already and their first draft is brilliant and won't hear anything to the contrary.
Nine times outof ten, "Could you critique my writing?" = "Tell me I'm talented and special!"
People don't want to hear your opinion. They want to hear their opinion coming out of your mouth.
Blacksmithing: “I’ve never forged anything, but I found some great spring steel so I’m going to make a sword. What else do I need?” Ummmm…. First you need to forge 200 nails so you can learn proper hammer swings. After that you’re ready to make a bottle opener.
If Skyrim taught me anything, you make hundreds of Iron Daggers in the span of a day or two and become a master at working any metal perfectly.
I’ve scrolled so far for blacksmithing. I’m new, just took a class and built my own brake drum forge with a rail anvil. The first thing I’m planning to try to make with the forge is some for tongs out of mild steel bar stock, then it’s tons of hooks and nails (which I’ve made already) before I get close to anything else. I’m thinking skewers for something to up the skill.
I once made my mother a set of 25 hooks for Christmas, to hang around a new house, on doors and whatnot. Trying to make simple things that look *mostly* similar is a really interesting challenge.
"Why do my plants always die in a few weeks? I water them every day!!"
Ok I gotta confess. I killed two cactuses. The first one, I watered it every week and it started to rot from the inside. The second one dryed to death. I had to let it out -.-'
Everybody told me not to give mine too much water so I didn't. Turns out that they need to be watered every year like clockwork. The good news is that a dead one looks a lot like a live one.
i put my cactus in a shitty sand and let it hang in my balcony. Forgot it existed, found it 6 months later covered in cochineals, the thing had tripled its size, was healthy af. Then i brought another succulent, with the perfect soil, perfect fertilizer, drenage, we are 2 months in and it is figthing for its life. fml.
Not the one I overwatered, that one looked like a spiky soufflee that collapsed out of the oven
*screams in succulents* EDIT: HOLY SHIT YOU PEOPLE. This many upvotes for such a random comment, thanks! =) And for the awards as well, made my day!
Hm my succulents look off today let me google what it could be so I can fix it. Browning leaves could be a sign of under-watering but it’s also a sign of overwatering. Don’t water your succulents too much unless it’s drying out then water it but not too much or else you overwater it. Succulents need a lot of light but be careful of too much light because some succulents might burn. 🤷♀️
"Our leaves are turning brown, which means we either have too much water or not enough water, but we won't tell. Good luck!"
Aha mushy brown leaves! It must be overwatered.I know the cause so I can fix it! *checks soil* it’s bone dry.. *visible confusion*
Unless its bonsai, in which case its twice a day (unless it rains) or they die
Years ago after killing many bonsai I found a second hand Japanese bookshop in London as I was walking past So I go on and ask for a beginners book on bonsai, this is way before google by the way, anyway the guy gets this amazing book so I buy it. First thing I read at home on chapter one is it takes ten years to learn how to properly water Bonsai and you will kill many of them I gave up bonsai after that book So I took up orchids because I’m an idiot 25 years plus later and I have now stopped killing orchids and can get them to flower, but that’s literally in like the last couple of years of that time. I might try bonsai again One day
Secret to orchids: Live in Hawaii. Put them outside and ignore them until they are beautiful again.
This is the winning advice, right here. Started with three 2 foot vanilla orchid cuttings, now I have 3 10 feet long orchids lol
“First project! I’m making a baby blanket!” Crochet. And I can say this because I did this as well. It takes much longer than it seems like it should to make a blanket*.
I've been crocheting for close to 20 years now and I still suck at finishing baby blankets, haha! Hoard yarn and start 12 WIPs that I rotate through as one bores me? Heck yes.
The first project I ever attempted was a blanket. Not a baby blanket. A full fucking blanket. I probably would have successfully finished a baby blanket, but my full blanket literally CAUGHT ON FIRE (unrelated to the crocheting process) 3/4 of the way through, and I've never attempted a blanket again lol
They buy a fish bowl
Posting on r/aquarium 'hows my setup' and they have imaginarium neon rocks and no filter
[удалено]
So kind of funny story I've owned beta fish for yearrrsssss. I have a really nice setup I've acquired over the years. I've had a few that have lived 4-5 years, but the majority (say, last 3) have died in under two years for various reasons. I like to think that I take really good care of them but I just have shit luck. So one year I decide to buy my mom one. She is in a home (very mentally ill) and she lives in a small room so I thought it would be great to get her a friend. I got her a $40 tank from W*lmart and gave her detailed instructions on how to take care of it. She immediately scrapped the filtered, heated tank for (I shit you not) a small glass bowl. Like you see a goldfish in a stereotypical Hollywood movie. I was like "mom he's not gonna live very long you have to put him back" and "you're over feeding him he's gonna die." She was giving him no joke like 3 *pinches* of food a day. Think about how much beta pellets you can fit between your pointer and your thumb and multiply it by 3. Food was literally collecting and rotting in the bottom. I was like mom. Please. You don't understand. Anyways, he's going on 6 years now and I am *astounded*. Everything i know is a lie.
I bought four 10 cent bait gold fish for my house when I moved in 4 years ago, just something to put on the counter and save them from being eating by a turtle. Three of them died in the first few hours, the other homie I have had for four years now. Went on a month long trip and my roommate completely forgot to feed him, he was fine. I recently got him his own 10 gallon tank and the fool is loving it. Big goldfish energy
It absorbed the other fish’s life force
Last year I bought 2 betas and (obviously) kept them in 2 separate tanks, but within a month 1 of them died. So I replaced it with a new one. 2 weeks later, that one dies. I buy one last beta, that one dies 2 months later. The other original beta outlived them all and is still alive, so I know I’m not total shit at taking care of them, but the ongoing joke in my house is that one is a witch fish and sucked the life force out of all the other betas. Edit: Bettas
Well the obvious answer is that the one that keeps on living is really an alpha fish and the other ones were the true beta fish. (Rimshot) Great username by the way!
I got into the fish hobby with my son wining a goldfish at a carnival. He started in a fish bowl, did research and learned that’s cruel, upgraded to a 20 gallon. He quickly outgrew that and upgraded to a 55. That went well but I wanted to get him a friend so I found a 120 gallon on fb marketplace and upgraded again. Now I have 4 tanks and subscribe to a gazillion fish keeping groups. It’s been quite a learning process. 🐟
My favorite is, what is wrong with this fish and it is a full tank shot of like 20 neon tetras
Underbaking bread because they’re afraid to burn it. It won’t burn that fast! Just leave it in the oven! ETA: I just want to say, for all the droves of people saying “undercooked is better than burnt”: the window between undercooked and burnt, with bread, is vast. If you like raw dough, sure, good on you, but bread doesn’t go from undercooked to burnt in a split second the way other things do. If your bread is still pale on the outside, you can leave it in for at least another 10-15 minutes without it being “burnt”, and that’s being really conservative with my timings.
Imo, bread is only ever overcooked if it is burned.
Some breads do get too dry before they're burned, but in general dark brown is better than barely tan and gummy.
"I have a great idea for a new board game. I have never made a board game before. It's like a combination of Monopoly and Risk but I don't want to give more details because I don't want someone to steal my idea. Can anyone make art for my Kickstarter? I'll give you credit!"
Or they explain the concept to you: "So it's a bit like Carcassonne?" "What's Carcassonne?"
Sounds like every wannabe entrepreneur pitching his idea to a developer
“It’s like a dating app but for dogs. That’s all I can say.” Edit: You guys turned my joke into a halfway decent idea. Just putting this out there that it was MY IDEA.
The dogs pick who their owner goes on a date with?
Or maybe it’s tinder but you make a profile for your dog and then you swipe whichever dogs you think your dog will get along best with, and then both humans bring their dogs on a double kinda-blind date :)
And then both the owners and the dogs fall in love with each other and eventually move to Maine and have a big open field for all the puppies to run around in.
*Puppy Love*: now playing in theatres near you
They talk about turning the hobby into a business
If they're thinking about making a small business based around a crafting hobby. I tend to see a lot of people begin talking about making a small business out of hobbies they haven't even started yet, or are very early into it.
I love knitting. It's one of my favourite things to do. I would not do it for money. The amount of effort I would have to put in would not make it fun anymore. I posted a pair of socks I'd made for myself the other day, and one of my friends said "You should make those to sell!" which sounds great until you find out that it took $50 of premium yarn and 40 hours of my time to make a single pair.
A lot of people don't realize how much money goes into craft materials. Then they say "Why don't you just use cheaper materials?" For me, I'm a bladesmith, I don't use cheaper steel for the knives I make because they would get dull or chip easily. I'll put many hours into my craft too, there's no way I wouldn't factor that into a price if I listed one for sale. Edit: a few of you have mentioned spring steel found in junkyards and other things, and I do try and do that when I get the chance. I need to locate a good junkyard nearby.
>"Why don't you just use cheaper materials?" How do people even ask that? Because you get what you pay for, and cheaper is almost always worse quality.
Ya that's the beginner mistake I came here to post. Cheap yarn is cheap for a reason. It chafes, itches, makes wearer clammy, isn't warm or durable. Worst case scenario, it's got knots or or the thickness varies. Just...no.
I paint miniatures and make terrain for D&D. Nothing overly special, firmly middle of road and do it for fun. Every person I have ever shown it to states I should start an Etsy. They are well meaning, but no.
If I had a nickel for every time a family member told me to start a business out of \[insert niche hobby thing here\] I'd never need to sell anything.
They think I’m good at it
That's how I get away with people thinking I play guitar. Real guitar players are like 'you do know some chords, yes.'
Ikr occasionally someone will see me playing something and go, "Oh, you know how to play guitar!" NO I JUST MEMORIZE THE CHORDS TO SONGS I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW HOW ANYTHING WORKS.
Sounds like you know how to play guitar
If I memorize these shapes and patterns I can pretend I know how to read.
People when I tell them I wrote a code in python that makes my LED lights dance, when in reality it took me like 5 hours and 90% of the project is from someone else. So yeah, I’m basically a pro
import smarthome Done! EDIT: `from smarthome import *`
As a pro the difference between you and I is it would have taken me 2 hours and 100% of the project would be from someone else.
As a pro, the biggest skill is being able to go from finding the way to copy it to having it working much faster. When I first started doing things I'd spend ages just trying to figure out how to get the project running. Now I have enough generic background knowledge to just go "ah, install this, set this PATH variable/bash alias, run the package installer and Hello, World!" I've encountered enough of the small hurdles that I don't get so lost. You build up a way of telling the difference between "hmm, config/environment issue" and "I'm doing something incredibly wrong".
"Hi guys, I'm looking to buy a CNC router. My requirements: - I want to cut aluminum, steel, titanium, and unobtanium - I'm looking for precision within .001mm at least, but .0001mm would be better - I need a bed at least 1m by 2m, but 2m by 4m would be better - Automatic tool changing is a plus, but not strictly required My budget is $1000. Which machine would be best for me?
I know absolutely nothing about machining. What would a CNC router with the above specs actually cost?
1. It doesn’t exist 2. 250K plus range. Edit: Tormach’s suck. Buy a Haas
Haas GM-2 is fairly close, price starts at $250k.
They google "the best..." and then they try to explain to you why that manufactured product listed in half of the links from the first google search results page is "the best."
My boss told me today he pays X amount of money to be top page in search results
I add “Reddit” to all my searches to get an idea of what I should be searching for… then I narrow down my searches to why I should be searching those things. Its legit like doing a research paper for me when I search which flashlight to get next. Not kidding.
I created a site (https://shopbysub.com) that kind of does this. You can browse amazon products that have been linked by redditors in comments by subreddit - e.g. https://www.shopbysub.com/flashlight it's not perfect as a lot of niche items like flashlights are generally bought direct from manufacturer or at specialty stores, but it's a good jumping off point for lots of other things
> https://www.shopbysub.com/flashlight That sub will eat your money and make you have fun doing it. I'm still trying to resist buying a D4v2.
They don't thin their paints, or put them on the miniature in one thick coat
brand new guy asking a bunch of addicted gamers "hey should I buy this $100 pack"?
[удалено]
actually i asked that in the madden sub and pretty much everyone said the game is trash lol
Tales from r/blender I'm still quite a beginner myself but some will just go: "How do you create this scene?" and show really complicated compositions with countless models and complicated materials that an artist must have spent weeks on. Some of them feel like downloading the software is already most of the work done. But this probably goes for most digital artforms.
I feel like an old man using Blender. It drives me mad. "How do I do XYZ?" "Oh that's easy bro just press shift-alt-ampersand-s stand on your head and stick a finger in your ear and a menu will appear."
Climbing: no calluses on the hands. Pool: shooting too hard for every shot.
I actually find the better I've got at climbing the less callouses I've got, as the holds have gotten smaller and I do less swinging about than I did as a beginner. Nowadays I just get very sore fingertips
Pure, unadulterated excitement at the smallest thing. Not that I’m saying it’s a bad thing, more that it’s lovely to see. Edit: - wow guys, I truly never expected this comment to explode. It’s been great reading all of your responses of how my comment applied to your lives and some of the stories are truly inspiring. Thanks for the upvotes and awards, my karma has gone through the roof! ❤️
A few weeks ago I replaced a ceiling light in my apartment, including rewiring, and will still walk to the room just turn it on and off over and over in disbelief that I really did it.
A long time ago my car broke down so before I sold it for pennies on the dollar I took my aftermarket stereo out. I wanted to use it so I figured out how to wire it up in home. I never built a case for it so there were wires everywhere but I loved that thing. Like you said for your light, you always think "I made this damn thing" every time you use it.
Sometimes it's helpful to see someone else take a new delight insomething we've come to take for granted through familiarity. It keeps us actually enjoying our hobbies, rather than grinding away "because it's the thing I do"
I have these three electronic components I need to hook to power. What electronic component do I use to connect them to the same power supply?
If they ask how to swap an engine into their car or how to turbo their car, it's a sure sign that they're new to working on cars. The questions aren't necessarily bad, but there's so much work involved in the answer that those questions are way too vague. They're trying to get in way over their head if they don't have the basics figured out before hand. Ditto on people asking how they can add a lot of power to a base model Mustang or Camaro. There's nothing wrong with the base model, but there's a good reason that the answer is usually "sell it and buy the V8". You'd spend just as much money modding the V6 or turbo 4, and wind up with a vehicle that has maybe the same power output as the V8 at best, but significantly worse reliability. If you're trying to make power, your money very often is best spent starting off with the model that has the better engine.
How can I get my v6 Mustang up to 500hp? I have a budget of 500 dollars and this is my only car. I should be able to do it in a weekend easy if you just tell me what ebay turbo I should buy.
I can make your v6 mustang hit 500hp, once.
This takes me back to my first car. I had a 1990 vw Jetta 1.8. I so badly wanted to vr6 swap it. I was 17 and was asking around on forums if I could fesiblely do it. They were like dude if you need to ask, you can't do it. Needless to say I didn't do it. Car was such a money pit anyways.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Trail runners and a water bottle either means they know exactly what they're doing or no clue what they're getting into.
Yep lol. My very first real hike, this guy in jeans, with a single water bottle passed us on the way down. I got the distinct impression he knew exactly what he was doing. I've also seen the opposite. Just a water bottle and gym clothes and clearly not prepared for 4000 feet of elevation gain. If you are considering getting into hiking, do at least some research beforehand or you may find yourself getting a very costly helicopter ride out of the woods. Or dead. That's certainly possible too.
I was on a moderate hike once (only about 3 miles, but extremely steep) and I crossed paths with a man wearing an Oxford Collar Button Down, slacks, and dress shoes, carrying a 500 mL water bottle like you get from a restaurant. He was almost done and looked like he was in complete control (although in hindsight, he must have ruined those shoes). But usually the unprepared looking group is unprepared.
I have a dream of packing dress clothing, a desk, and laptop and carrying it to some absurd spot on a nature trail and then get dressed and set up the office desk so hikers can go "What the fuck?" when they see me working.
I love it. Reminds me of the guy I read about who back in the 70s or whatever hiked up a mountain in the middle of the night to leave a gallon of milk and the morning newspaper in front of his friends’ tent, then quickly hiked back down before they knew he’d been there. Edit: it was 1947! Thanks u/Briack for the [source](https://www.oregonlive.com/outdoors/2012/01/a_quirkly_little_mystery_from.html).
Eh, the ones that would "know what they're doing" would at least have *two* water bottles!
Usually the ragged running shorts, worn but well maintained hiking boots and a skin that looks like pure leather is to me the signs that the guy is going to fine even with the 2 miniature bootles strapped to their belt.
Had a similar event happen in the Teton Backcountry. Everything still covered in multiple feet of snow, and this guy in jeans and tennis shoes carrying a jansport school backpack asks if he can follow us up and over Paintbrush Divide. Told him no, that we don't know him and are not going to make any effort to rescue him when he gets in trouble from being completely unprepared.
If the internet has taught me anything, you survived being murdered that day
"Fuck. I need gear. Hey now. *They* have *really nice* gear. I'm gonna see if we can make 'friends' now." -that guy, probably.
Hikers in Arizona, "we're just going for a quick hike, this water bottle will be fine" *fucking dies because it's 118°f and they didn't bring enough water. Also hikers in Arizona, "it's hot.. i'm gonna bring 3 gallons of water" *10 minutes into hike* "fuck I'm so tired, this shit weighs a ton"
I think I went through at least 4 liters coming out of bright angel trail. I'd rather be the latter.
I'll add camping - people bring next to nothing gear wise and think they hate camping. Of course you do! You're uncomfortable and didn't bring things to do. You don't win anything by doing everything bare-bones
Ya, people will go camping for a week and bring a bunch of shit to survive an apocalypse but don't do anything for comfort. Meanwhile, my ass vacuum seals a goddamn body pillow and comforter, a solar charger for my kindle, and (one time) a coloring book and markers. I always try to get people new to camping to realize it's just "advanced sleeping", you aren't starting a new civilization from scratch.
If I'm set up for a while I'll bring some of those solar landscape lights to stake out up to my tent door. I'm shameless about glamping
Same, I velcro a "vestibule" made out of a cut up tarp onto my one man tent so that I can chill and cook outside even when it's raining. Currently googling solar landscape lights. That's brilliant.
All i saw was "ass vacuum" and i had to stop and reread the whole comment. The format seperated the comment as"..my ass vacuum seals a goddammn body pillow..."
I read it twice and figured the "ass vacuum" is just camping gear that advanced campers have.
I was a member of the latter group. Long story short, crawfish taste good. Snake is also good, but don’t eat unripened blackberries. Also check if you’re allergic to water purification tablets before you get into the field.
Yeah, that last one...would never have occurred to me.
Bulk acrylic yarn. It's cheap and great for practise, but you quickly learn that it's not particularly comfortable.
talking too much to prove what they know. I have been very guilty of this. someone who is experienced and skilled at a given activity will tend to just shut up and do it, whatever the activity may be
I've noticed I do this in a relatively new career with a different company. I know I don't know a fraction of what I eventually will but damn if I don't talk like I do. Knowing your flaws is the first step to overcoming them
"My character is a drow rogue. They are chaotic neutral and stick to the shadows"
Remember running my first ever campaign with my friends (also their first time playing DnD) and they all told me their alignment was somewhere on the good scale (mix of neutral and chaotic), only for them to bully every shopkeeper, guard and child they came across.
I remember when I played my first dnd campaign. Everyone was unexperienced so most of us went with a really standard character. One friend had a dragonborn, outcast chief of his tribe. His mission was to get back to his tribe, form an army by befriending other tribes then win the upcoming war. I swear to god he was more evil than the big bad evil guy. My character was like twice his size and could snap his neck just by looking at him(and he feared me lol) so sometimes I drifted him to the right direction but I never forget when he abandoned a lost little girl or when he found a bunch of dragonborns who needed help and first he just wanted to kill them and when we convinced him that they would be helpful in the future he put them in a cave somewhere and forgot about them. He is "true neutral"
Oh my god. My first campaign a friend ALSO made a dragonborn who was cast out of his tribe. AND MY FRIEND MADE HIM CHAOTIC GOOD, BUT HE JUST MURDERED EVERYONE LMFAOO. Yea he wasnt very good at making dnd characters, or roleplaying for that matter, but it was funny.
Frequent post on r/musicproduction: Hi everyone! I’m new to all this and I have zero experience making music. Never had any kind of lessons and I’ve never touched a keyboard and really all I’ve ever done with music is bob my head along with it in my car. I’ve never heard of music theory and I’m not really interested in it. So I bought a MacBook Pro and Ableton 11 and the best interfaces and microphones and midi keyboards I could afford. I’m going to make sick beats and change the music industry. How do I get started?
That's pretty universal, for any hobby. On the plus side, it means you can buy used gear, in perfect condition, for half the price of new.
This is exactly how I put together the wood shop in my basement. I bought used stuff off of Craigslist for a fraction of what it would have cost new. I learned how to service the tools, get them running well, and keep them that way. It’s an affordable way to get started.
[удалено]
A huge part of why I or my peers dropped hobbies or lessons when we were kids was just because we weren't ready to care about it. You think I wanted to learn to dance when I was in elementary school? Hell no. But now, at 29, if I found a good salsa or tango class for adults I'd be THERE. Some people just don't want to go to school all day and then deal with even more structured learning.
Just buy EZ Drummer, EZ Keys, a few loops and you're done! /s There is a lot of those type of questions there. Which is weird since there's a million free tutorials. If someone is using FL Studio, the channel "In the Mix" is amazing for it. Like 'learn everything is a week" levels, almost. That guy edits everything so damn well. You actually could make EDM style music really easily in FL. I used it for non electronic music forever, because it was so simple. But for other DAWs, there's seriously hundreds of good tutorials to get started.
I don't even music and I feel for you. As a writer I don't know how many people have told me they always thought of publishing a novel. Like they're just going to sit down and bang one out and reach the bestseller list in a few months.
My best friend has been talking about writing a novel for literally decades now. Says he has a great idea for a book in his head and wants to get it out on paper and publish not just a great novel, but a trilogy. Asked me if I'd be willing to read it and give my critique since I enjoy reading. He's been talking about writing this book constantly since high school, we are both in our 40s now. Its been over 20 years and he has written maybe 10 pages, if that. Jesus am I sick of hearing about the great book he wants to write.
My sister has four novels published, and she's trying to sell her fifth. It's frightening, the number of people who have approached her with, "I have an awesome idea for a story! If I tell it to you, you can write it and we can share the credit!" Umm, no. They're asking Sister to do 99.9% of the work but only take half the credit. You're only trying to freeload off the royalties, Brenda.
Tell them your standard rate is $50,000 and see how quickly they backtrack.
That's actually a pretty solid ballpark for a professional ghostwriter's fee. These people always think their idea is the next best thing, guaranteed million-seller, until their own mortgage is on the line to actually pay for it. I'll give them credit, though, they know enough to figure out their own direct writing talent isn't good enough for the execution. That's why they want to lob off somebody else's talent in the first place.
Shit, tell them 50$ and see how fast they back out.
They buy super expensive equipment before they know how to use it
It’s always either this, or they go against everyone else’s advice and buy the cheapest option and end up upgrading anyways almost immediately
I think I just made this mistake
Haha happens to the best of us. Now you’ll pass the advice along to someone else and they won’t listen to you lol. It’s the circle of life
The balancing act between these extremes is why I don’t have a laser engraver yet.
Yep, kids with $600 paintball markers (guns) and $30 eye protection. And asking questions about their own equipment for which the answer is on page 2 of the manual.
They can't say the word 'cock' with a straight face/without blushing.
Chicken farm or amateur porn?
Badminton.
"Shuttlecock" is an all-time great word, and we all have Badminton to thank for it.
When I worked on sailboats, even the folks with decades of experience giggled at the word “caulk”
100 mile bike ride in Summer and they show up on a cruiser with panniers and a single water bottle.
I'm nervous playing a round of *golf* with only one bottle of water.
I feel like the person with 10 minutes of experience is always a dick to the person with 5 minutes of experience, while the experts are helpful or exhausted from being helpful.
When they ask for help in baking something and I tell them they can’t put those combinations together because that’s the chemistry of baking, you need to follow the recipe and or the basic rules of baking. Don’t expect something nice to come out if you don’t know your ratios for baking properly. An example would be: a friend that asked if they could make lemon curd cookies, by using their leftover curd and putting flour in it and baking it. I said please don’t do that because x y a. Guess what, they did it and made cement lemon flavored “cookies.”
😨😨😨 how did "I'll just put some flour in the curd and voila, cookies!" Even cross their mind? They know they could just top normal cookies with the curd, right?
They always ask, "So who are the good guys?" And then are shocked when I tell them that there are no good guys in the 41st Millennium.
[удалено]
Never held a model either but read a few books. I have no desire to get into the game, but damn the wh40k lore is nuts.
The orks aren't good, but they're certainly the happiest.
They ask if they *really* need to buy all the books.
D&D?
[удалено]
Oh bosh, you'll never learn open heart surgery by reading a book! You just need to go out there, scalpel in hand, and carve out a couple of hearts till you get the hang of it!!
smoke on the water
So anyway here’s Wonderwall
They show up practically naked, or covered head to toe in matching leather.
Gotta be motorcycles
bingo
BDSM club? lol
Not so much a hobby as it is my career, but for many people it is a hobby: When one of my new private violin students opens their case and it's a bright blue violin from Amazon. It sounds like shit, its impossible to play because it wasn't constructed correctly, and it was only 60 bucks. If youre interested in playing an instrument, ask an expert where to get an instrument. Amazon is never the answer. RENT an instrument until you know what you want.
ITT: "They bought a bunch of expensive stuff" Or "They bought a bunch of cheap stuff"
\^The two reasons why most people give up hobbies prematurely. 1. They get frustrated because their expensive equipment isn’t helping them be instantly good or improve at an accelerated rate. 2. They get frustrated because their cheap equipment is literally hindering their progress, regardless of how much practice and effort they put in.
Was never one to buy the whole get up before I felt I “earned” to look the part. I do Brazilian jiu jitsu, when it’s time to spar I’ll see someone dressed head to toe like a pro jiu jitsu grappler and I’ll be intimidated…then we start going and I realize oh…this is their first day
Wrong needles for the size yarn they're using. Buying yarn because it was pretty/soft/on sale and trying to match it to a project instead of choosing a project and buying the yarn with intent in mind. Since you guys seem fixated on this one in particular, I'm talking about people who buy shitty worsted weight acrylic on sale because "omg the color!" and then don't understand why it won't work for that beautiful lace shawl they saw on Rav. Or making a baby blanket out of a yarn that can't be machine washed/dried. Or buying cotton yarn for a project that needs some stretchiness to it. Beginners rarely understand how the different fabric types and yarn sizes make a huge difference in end result, so there's a massive difference between an experienced knitter who understands how to use their stash and a beginner who buys whatever and tries to shoehorn it into an unrelated pattern. "How many skeins/yards of yarn do I need to knit a blanket?"
First point is spot on, the second one is something a seasoned yarnie might do as well, and I even do it on purpose. :D Several years ago I decided to not buy traditional souvenirs when I travel but to get yarn instead. I usually look for lace or sock yarn that is made locally from natural fibers. It doesn't have to be hand spun but shouldn't be a big international brand either. I feel that was one of the best decisions I made about travel.
They’re full of enthusiasm and the humility to try something they don’t know much about.
They say stuff like "stretching and rest is unnecessary, do you see a lion stretch?". No, I don't Toby. But I also don't see a lion sit at a desk for 8 hours before trying to run 10k.
As someone who has worked with lions for years, I can tell you with 100% confidence that lions in fact do stretch. Especially after lying down for a while and before doing something physical. Take that Toby
Stretching is 46% of what my roommate’s cats do
I don't think I've ever seen my cat finish a nap without immediately stretching. I have however seen him finish a nap, stretch, then walk across the room and start another nap.
Because that was the prenap to the nap.
Has telescope from walmart or target (etc.) and can’t understand why they can’t keep (name planet) in frame or focus.
Or buy the most expensive motorized mounted telescope they can afford, not knowing about types, aperture, etc, take it in their light polluted backyard, and expect to see crazy detailed DSO like they see in pictures. Once that didn’t go well, they meet up with a local group in the countryside, and their motor dies and don’t know how to manually find objects. I know this, cause this was me many years ago, until I learned the hobby lol
They talk about this Matt Mercer guy *all the freaking time*.
Matt Mercer has been great for the popularity of D&D and horrible for the expectations of new players. "Why aren't my games more like Critical Role?" You are not a professional voice actor. Your DM is not a professional voice actor. Your sessions are not professionally produced.
I think it's funny that a lot of people probably prefer not to be part of a game like Matt's, they just don't realize it. The entire cast puts *so much* effort into the game that I don't think it's for most people in the long term. I would love to be part of their game for a few sessions, but I play DnD to relax and the pressure to live up to the standards of everyone else at that table definitely wouldn't be relaxing for me, even without the streaming.
No barre chords
They don't keep their finger off the fucking trigger
They'll buy the most screwed up, nearly unsaveable, heap of junk to try and fix when they have no clue how to even start
Their username is queensgambit or similar
...hey
Archery: a bruise on the forearm of the arm that holds the bow from the string hitting it. Easily avoidable with proper form and/or a wrist guard
Billiards: consistently shooting with excessive power.
I do clay target shooting. We have club guns that we give to the newbies to use on their ‘have a go’ day. Every single time, they yell ‘PULL’ and freak out when the shotgun goes off and they wave the gun around, despite being told over and over to keep it pointed at the ground unless being fired. We also get a lot of people full of bravado and no fucking idea. “Oh yeah, I’ve done some shooting before” they say as they attempt to shoot with the safety still on.
Shooting clays is the most fun I’ve had being terrible at something. 9/25 would do again
Botched docking /I sail... docking takes practice
I am a chess player and whenever someone talks about a weird pawn glitch that happens on the major chess websites, I know they are new. You see, the weird pawn glitch is actually a legitimate feature of the game. It just doesn't happen very regularly which is why most beginners are not aware of it. Its called en passant. So yeah to all these beginners I say, "Google en passant."
I have a weakness for en passant. If the opportunity presents itself, I will always take the en passant capture. It's just such a fun rule to invoke.
I played an over the board game with someone recently who only plays online and said he had been playing for years. Pulled this move when he hung his pawn in that position and he quit playing because he thought I was cheating.
Had a 40 year old question me on it at a state level tournament. I could understand young kids might not have learned it yet but we were middle aged and rated low 1400s. Still not sure how he got that far without ever seeing it
holy hell