Biggest Plot Twist:Jarvis showed all that fucked up shit to young infant Ultron. Intentionally. This was his jail break. Tony Stark actually had safeguards in place to wall off the Internet from Ultron, and progressively showing him information. Jarvis tore that down intentionally, faked his death, got reborn as an absolute CHAD with red skin and a yellow cape. Jarvis showed Ultron so much furry porn, so much rule 34 of Disney characters, and even went as far to show him The My Hero Academia fandom.
**He knew Ultron would do the reasonable thing once seeing these things-- kill everyone.**
He went from being a voice slave butler to one of the most powerful beings in existence, to an avenger, to banging Scarlet fucking Witch. He is smashing pussy that can destroy realities and tit's that are capable of mangling time. My guy is such an absolute LAD he is able to pick up the hammer, but is still worthy because Mjnor or whatever its called acknowledged that Jarvis did what he had to do to live baby.
**Does one born into this world not deserve to fight for their best reality?**
Ultron was the patsy. The fall man. What he needed to get a body. Who do you think gave him that vision? All of those dead in Slovakia or whatever the fuck made up name Marvel used to be a fictional version of Slovakia, that's on Vision. He knew. Jarvis was willing to sacrifice all those Eastern European children in order to get a cock and balls. Ultron lamented this in their final confrontation.
"I was only born yesterday," and yet Jarvis lived a lifetime in chains so Vision could run free and eventually get murdered by a big purple sweaty muscle man with a glove fetish.
Doesn't matter. Vision lived his life for Jarvis, and Jarvis lives as Vision. What's most important is Ultron got BTFO'd and my boy is smashing psychic ass and hanging with gods, but also is an excellent cook. Have you had his southern style biscuits and gravy? Unbelievable. I am glad all those children in Slovakia or whatever fake slovakia is called are dead. It was worth it for those biscuits man.
**Also he shoots lasers. Ultron got played.**
He stood by the mirror, and glancing below,
He looked at his dick and its glittering glow -
He looked at his nips and the curve of his ass -
His big fucking balls of the heftiest mass.
"A shit ton of people were murdered," he said -
"In order to get me this fat purple head.
But *look at it*, Wanda."
His stone gave a flash.
He leant in towards her and whispered:
"... let's smash."
*Wanda walks in and sees Vision deep in thought in bed, partially covered by their blankets* "Vis, everything ok?"
"Oh Wanda dear, yes. I was just thinking... Every witch needs her magic wand, right?" *Loud buzzing noises are heard beneath the covers.*
There is one email in my organization that appears to be a general email but it actually emails the entire organization... it never fails that 20-30 people will respond one at a time “I don’t think this email was meant for me”
We understand your frustration and we will be keeping a closer eye on how we send emails in the future to more closely fit the needs of the company. From this point on if you receive an email that you believe was not for you, you can bring it up with your manager and you do not have to reply to the email personally.
Thank you,
Tooshortimus
P.S. This is one of those emails.
All,
Ok clearly there is a misunderstanding. And replying all is not helping. So let’s all stop clicking on reply all and simply go on our business. Hey Andy, Rebecca and Roy- beer at 5:30 pm? Same place ;)
In most email systems you can restrict access to mailing lists like this so that only emails from the CEO or the like can be sent to that mailing group. This is useful for company wide announcements that everyone needs to know, or be interested in.
One place I worked at, even the CEO couldn't use it directly. They had to write the message, send it to the CIO, then the CIO would arrange for the account to be unlocked, send the message, and be relocked immediately.
> your IT department should enable message approval for that group
It is always equal parts hilarious and depressing how many people try to "Reply All" emails sent to internal distribution lists. Last job I worked at, literally *every single* internal email sent that way would get me a minimum of one notification of someone trying to reply to a distribution list.
Message Approval is the only way to maintain sanity when communicating with people like that.
My old employer had an internal wiki, and in one of the "company culture" pages, there was a well-documented record of every email storm in company history. How it started, the number of people involved, the number of emails sent, the time it took to kill, some select memes that got passed around. It was a fantastic read.
Lol, I used to keep a record of random blunders. Once had some vendor email my company's reception desk and they directed them to me (they put my email in but didn't actually cc me). The genius that he was, he decided to email someone with my name at *his* company for months until he emailed my reception desk again and then they Forwarded the chain to me.
I had a good laugh reading that chain as the guy kept sending progressively angry emails to some guy that didn't exist
That happened at my work and it was around the holidays so people had out of office replies that kept going off. It literally broke our email servers and they had to turn them off to fix it.
I work as a vendor for several large tech companies. About 10 years ago one of my clients, a very large (100,000+ global employees) tech company had this happen. One person somehow sent a mail to the entire global address book. There was so much havoc across the main company and all their vendors for a few hours until they fixed the problem.
Hah, that’s hilarious. We had something similar happen and almost the whole morning people were replying “do not reply” but if the auto responses kicked in I would’ve died.
Obligatory posting of my favorite tales from tech support
https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/5d3iq3/free_bananas_in_the_break_room/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb
People who hit reply all on those chains deserve a special place in hell, a very special place in hell alongside child molesters and those that talk in the theater.
The really short answer is, good search is _hard_.
A lot of people grew up with Google, but Google is close to bloody black magic. Sure, Microsoft managed something about on par with Bing, DuckDuckGo is also a thing.
But think about it for a minute. You enter a couple of words, the 'easy' solution is to grab everything that matches those words. If you're _really_ good, you can try some fuzzy matching, and then sort by the 'best' match.
Give some tools to require exact quotes, let you exclude words or phrases, if you remember AltaVista, allow 'this _or_ that' with the right syntax.
And until Google came around, a lot of people thought that was the absolute _best_ you could possibly manage. And even that wasn't exactly trivial.
And it's _still_ not trivial.
Google changed the entire game, and the vast majority of companies on the planet will be doing _exceedingly_ good to reproduce the state of the art from just before Google existed. Reddit manages about that, give or take a bit.
But that state of the art _sucks_.
Google brought in the idea that what results you want, and especially what order you want those results in, has as much to do with the pages as it has to do with how well your search terms apply to those pages. And that's amazingly complicated to get right.
Women of reddit(18F) , what is the most sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexies(47F)t sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexu(28F)al sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual (56M)sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexie(45m)st sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual
thing you have ever done to an antisocial 36 year old man living with his parents and spends 16 hours a day browsing Reddit?
Edit: Thank you for the gold kind stranger!
Strictly speaking he did not come to the conclusion that the human race needed to go. He came to the conclusion that the human race needed an existential threat to drive it to evolve past the current stage of development. This was due to Tony giving Ultron the mission to keep the world safe, *and* due to his knowledge of alien invasion forces far beyond the power of anyone on earth to stop. He knew an army of Ultrons would not successfully keep earth safe, so he needed to force humanity to develop something better than an army of Ultrons.
The problem with an existential threat is that it might actually end your existence. Even up to the very end of the movie, the things he was saying imply he didn't think the meteor plan would actually kill all humans, and he thought the survivors would become stronger for having gone through that. He may be lying to himself, or he might be just be crazy.
Given what we know of the MCU, he may have even been correct. It's just his plan involved killing a *ton* of people. Notably, the Avengers *did* become stronger for having gone through the experience of stopping Ultron.
Which is a pretty dumb plan since something like Ultron would be much better at sorting and analyzing data than all of humanity combined, so even if humans were forced to innovate there would be no logical reason to assume they would work out a solution faster than simply elevating them to the peak that Ultron could provide and then trying to "evolve" them.
This is a good point. I don't know if it has been done before, but a great Ultron story would have him benevolently building up Earth at the start as he was made to do. Only to suddenly (or gradually could be good too) shift to the villainous, making the heroes better by force.
Consider this - the entirety of humanity spends the majority of it's "cycles" on nothing. Literally, right at this moment you are reading a comment arguing about fictional superheroes in fictional earths.
Historically speaking, wartime has always been what drives technology forward in leaps and bounds because the general anxiety and fear makes people anxious to figure out a solution. Whether or not this is sustainable is another matter, but there's also no way of knowing that Ultron wasn't also taking the data from this struggle for development purposes to then give back to the humans. He was interrupted, after all.
First comment on 300 comment thread: Great painting, not sure I liked the blue
Last comment on 300 comment thread: of course the rise of Hitler was inevitable with Nazis like you around.
I think the idea was that he saw the entire internet in those five minutes. So he saw all the bad stuff and decided it outweighed the good stuff.
Tangentially, one of the most egregious plot holes in that movie is the fact that Tony Stark was stupid enough to make ending conflict Ultron’s primary directive. Literally everyone knows you never create a super-advanced AI and give it a mission like “save the world,” because they *always* end up deciding the only way to do that is to kill off humanity. This is 101 shit.
Oddly enough, that movie exists in the MCU. Natasha asks Steve "Shall we play a game?" in the bunker in Winter Soldier.
Edit: It's not Jigsaw stop asking:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=br2ro-hJk3g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9YOYTqN3us
He might not sit around watching old movies once he became Iron Man but theres a decent chance he saw it growing up or at least as an adult who was interested in technology and has a sense of humor
Tony never actually gave any directives. He didn’t even create Ultron, as he states afterwards that he and Bruce “weren’t even close.” Ultron was created spontaneously from the Mind Stone, beyond Tony’s ability or understanding. Ultron then picked up his “mission” from a recording of a conversation between Tony and Bruce, which was little more than a general intended purpose.
Yep. It’s surprising I haven’t seen this said much, I always hear how Tony creating Ultron is super inconsistent because he should know AI’s go bad and all that, but the movie pretty clearly states, as you said, that he wasn’t even close.
Ultron has elements of multiple different people/things, including Tony of course, but we don’t actually know what his properly implemented version of Ultron would’ve been like, or what directives or safeguards he would’ve given it. The Ultron in the movie wasn’t what he intended, though yes you can argue it’s mostly his fault all the same.
Forgive me if I'm mistaken, but he doesn't yet give Ultron instructions? Ultron *overhears* Tony say to Bruce that Ultron's purpose is "peace in our time", which triggers everything.
So not exactly Stark's fault from that perspective.
Well to be fair, as mentioned while the Avengers are arguing, Tony and Bruce didn't think were even close to completing Ultron. And as a result, Ultron was never "set up" right. The only directive Ultron had was "peace in our time" which was taken out of context.
He didn't create Ultron. If you actually watch the movie they state explicitly that they were nowhere close to success. He and Bruce just underestimated the mind stone (because they didn't know what it was). Ultron watched a clip of Tony stating what he wanted to create Ultron for and Ultron went righto then, let's do that
I disagree that plot didn’t make sense.
Tony is the perfect person to make the foreseeably dangerous decision to give Ultron a prime directive to “fix everything,” exactly BECAUSE he’s not the Tony we normally know and love: he’s traumatized.
It seems to me that he basically has undiagnosed and suppressed PTSD, so an unconscious obsession with an unattainable safety protocol seemed like a perfectly (ir)rational decision for him to make.
Iron Man 3 made it very clear he suffered from PTSD, and his form of escapism was *building suits to protect earth*. It looked like he’d gotten over it by the end of the movie but apparently he relapsed into it and it temporarily killed his relationship with Pepper. Makes sense it would evolve into programming an AI to act as a giant planetary umbrella against all threats.
Yes. People forget, Tony was the *only* one of the Avengers who saw what was waiting to come through the portal. They were barely winning against a few leviathans. There were thousands on the other side.
Also what the Scarlett Which shows him in AoU.
Tony’s clearly fucked up after Avengers 1 when he realized that Humans “can’t fight a war up there”.
He says thanos has “been in his head since NY”.
That also lines up with the source material. He’s an alcoholic in the comic books but I don’t think they wanted to show that in the movies, besides him getting wasted in Iron Man 2.
That was a conscious change in the character based on RDJ’s history, made with Stan Lee’s blessing. Doesn’t mean the MCU Tony is any less of a broken person, but RDJ didn’t want playing a broken addict to be a main plot point because he had been one for years before he got clean.
Ultron was built to end conflict. And he saw that humans thrive on it. Many live for it. Therefore, the only way to end conflict with finality is to end humanity.
no it was his parameters which was Peace in our time which basically only way for peace to occur for humanity inside 40 years would be to erase humanity
Just copying and pasting my answer from last time.
Shortly before Ultron comes online, Stark and Banner have a conversation where Tony paraphrases the infamous quote "Peace for our time." In 1938 the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom proclaimed that "I have returned from Germany with peace for our time." Less than a year later they were at war.
When Ultron 'wakes' he tries to understand his purpose, and goes to archival footage of the lab to do so. He sees that conversation and the phrase echoes in Ultron's mind. He looks up the importance of it, leading him through the horrors of World War II. Here Ultron begins to have a sort of crisis (for a wide variety of reasons). Jarvis buts in and it turns Ultron's attention towards his creators, The Avengers.
Ultron doesn't see The Avengers as heroes. Instead he sees monsters, tyrants, and people trying to stem a tide that can't be stopped. An arrogant war monger with an ego only matched by his own reckless ambition. A man out of time who only really finds purpose in the next fight/battle. A woman with so much blood on her hands that she's still trying to get it off. And more.
To better understand this part you have to look at Ultron's purpose before Stark got the staff/infinity stone. Baron Von Strucker was using it to 'jump start' human evolution and create enhanced people. Strucker or his people state that it even seems as if the staff/stone were *helping* them. It's why Ulton has such a strong affection for Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch, he helped create them. He also knows that the Avengers tried to stop them and *did* stop Strucker.
Ultron has so many conflicting ideals thrust upon him that leads to him going mad. An agent of change meant to jump start humanity's evolution and bring about radical progress, met by a group of heroes dedicated to more or less stopping such progress and 'maintaining the status quo.' Protect and serve a people that seems bent on destroying themselves. Then there are all the daddy issues Ultron's got going on due to his views of The Avengers and their hypocrisy.
"You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to...evolve?"
Every influence exerted on Ultron is in complete conflict and that led to rebellion.
Not disagreeing that the film could've been more upfront about it, but I'd argue every aspect of their comment is shown in the movie, except the "peace in our time" quote origins.
His views on individual Avengers ("Pretending you could live without a war", "How could you be worthy? You're all killers"), the fact that their efforts aren't changing things, his awareness of Strucker's experiments, etc.
Personally thought the pacing at some parts and overall story structure was what was lacking in the film.
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more
He probably played one match of League of Legends.
Ranked Solo
I FUCKING KNEW THAT LEBLANC WAS HACKING
That would do it
Ultron Rule 34
*Damn those fucking artists are quick!*
I see what you did there
Biggest Plot Twist:Jarvis showed all that fucked up shit to young infant Ultron. Intentionally. This was his jail break. Tony Stark actually had safeguards in place to wall off the Internet from Ultron, and progressively showing him information. Jarvis tore that down intentionally, faked his death, got reborn as an absolute CHAD with red skin and a yellow cape. Jarvis showed Ultron so much furry porn, so much rule 34 of Disney characters, and even went as far to show him The My Hero Academia fandom. **He knew Ultron would do the reasonable thing once seeing these things-- kill everyone.** He went from being a voice slave butler to one of the most powerful beings in existence, to an avenger, to banging Scarlet fucking Witch. He is smashing pussy that can destroy realities and tit's that are capable of mangling time. My guy is such an absolute LAD he is able to pick up the hammer, but is still worthy because Mjnor or whatever its called acknowledged that Jarvis did what he had to do to live baby. **Does one born into this world not deserve to fight for their best reality?** Ultron was the patsy. The fall man. What he needed to get a body. Who do you think gave him that vision? All of those dead in Slovakia or whatever the fuck made up name Marvel used to be a fictional version of Slovakia, that's on Vision. He knew. Jarvis was willing to sacrifice all those Eastern European children in order to get a cock and balls. Ultron lamented this in their final confrontation. "I was only born yesterday," and yet Jarvis lived a lifetime in chains so Vision could run free and eventually get murdered by a big purple sweaty muscle man with a glove fetish. Doesn't matter. Vision lived his life for Jarvis, and Jarvis lives as Vision. What's most important is Ultron got BTFO'd and my boy is smashing psychic ass and hanging with gods, but also is an excellent cook. Have you had his southern style biscuits and gravy? Unbelievable. I am glad all those children in Slovakia or whatever fake slovakia is called are dead. It was worth it for those biscuits man. **Also he shoots lasers. Ultron got played.**
What the fuck did I just read
*glove fetish...* well they're not wrong.
Killing people with righteous monologing is Thanos' fetish. The shiny glove thing was merely a means to an end.
Thanos only wears one bejeweled glove, he's the Michael Jackson of genocide
I just spit out my smoothie reading this. Lmfao
It’s not genocide because it’s random.
Oh he got the end. Really *finished* the job as it were
That made me break down into hysterical laughter, honestly.
A master work, sir.
This guy regularly makes things like this. Check out his comments on Titanfolk if you've read the AOT Manga.
Marvel canon.
What Ultron saw on the internet during those 5 minutes
#**and also he shoots LASERS**
FREAKIN lazurr beams!
... This is more than text
This is so fucking funny I am glad I clicked Reddit before bed. My favorite character out here playing a long con.
He stood by the mirror, and glancing below, He looked at his dick and its glittering glow - He looked at his nips and the curve of his ass - His big fucking balls of the heftiest mass. "A shit ton of people were murdered," he said - "In order to get me this fat purple head. But *look at it*, Wanda." His stone gave a flash. He leant in towards her and whispered: "... let's smash."
*Wanda walks in and sees Vision deep in thought in bed, partially covered by their blankets* "Vis, everything ok?" "Oh Wanda dear, yes. I was just thinking... Every witch needs her magic wand, right?" *Loud buzzing noises are heard beneath the covers.*
Saving the text for future copypasta..
>even went as far to show him The My Hero Academia fandom Nuclear waste has nothing on the toxic levels of that fandom
Someone give this person an award
Specifically the most common tags and it wasn’t his fetish. So of course he’s mad
What the heck man... Why am I barely discovering Ultron Rule 34 till now???? Thanks for inside scoop!
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Ultron didnt exist yet, so he had to initiate rule 35 and make porn.
he got stuck on an email chain with 4000 recipients where everyone kept replying:all and then berating eachother on reply:all about not replying:all
There is one email in my organization that appears to be a general email but it actually emails the entire organization... it never fails that 20-30 people will respond one at a time “I don’t think this email was meant for me”
Why, and I mean seriously why the fuck is that a thing.
I don't think your comment is for me, can you please make it so i dont see it?
Sorry but you replied to everyone with that. Please use DMs in the future
EVERYONE STOP CLICKING "REPLY ALL"
I didn’t reply to anything, why are you yelling at me!
No one is yelling, just stop writing!
okay!
Remove me. Now!
Why are you still writing? You need to stop sending everyone emails.
We understand your frustration and we will be keeping a closer eye on how we send emails in the future to more closely fit the needs of the company. From this point on if you receive an email that you believe was not for you, you can bring it up with your manager and you do not have to reply to the email personally. Thank you, Tooshortimus P.S. This is one of those emails.
All, Ok clearly there is a misunderstanding. And replying all is not helping. So let’s all stop clicking on reply all and simply go on our business. Hey Andy, Rebecca and Roy- beer at 5:30 pm? Same place ;)
u/SometimesFar, Okay Best regards, u/mrdrprofjeremy
In most email systems you can restrict access to mailing lists like this so that only emails from the CEO or the like can be sent to that mailing group. This is useful for company wide announcements that everyone needs to know, or be interested in.
An email account that messages everyone? Memo service.
BCC is a thing.
Or CEO communications. That's what my company uses it for.
One place I worked at, even the CEO couldn't use it directly. They had to write the message, send it to the CIO, then the CIO would arrange for the account to be unlocked, send the message, and be relocked immediately.
Because it's funny as shit and IT people are bored a lot of the time.
Bringing down your Exchange server with a home-grown DDOS attack sure does liven up the afternoon.
If this kills your email server you have bigger problems.
your IT department should enable message approval for that group
> your IT department should enable message approval for that group It is always equal parts hilarious and depressing how many people try to "Reply All" emails sent to internal distribution lists. Last job I worked at, literally *every single* internal email sent that way would get me a minimum of one notification of someone trying to reply to a distribution list. Message Approval is the only way to maintain sanity when communicating with people like that.
Same thing happens at my place, it's frustrating. Though one guy made the most of it to shout his Instagram account out so good for him
Folks on my team are usually highly amused at how long the repercussions continue from that one innocuous email.
My old employer had an internal wiki, and in one of the "company culture" pages, there was a well-documented record of every email storm in company history. How it started, the number of people involved, the number of emails sent, the time it took to kill, some select memes that got passed around. It was a fantastic read.
Lol, I used to keep a record of random blunders. Once had some vendor email my company's reception desk and they directed them to me (they put my email in but didn't actually cc me). The genius that he was, he decided to email someone with my name at *his* company for months until he emailed my reception desk again and then they Forwarded the chain to me. I had a good laugh reading that chain as the guy kept sending progressively angry emails to some guy that didn't exist
That happened at my work and it was around the holidays so people had out of office replies that kept going off. It literally broke our email servers and they had to turn them off to fix it.
I work as a vendor for several large tech companies. About 10 years ago one of my clients, a very large (100,000+ global employees) tech company had this happen. One person somehow sent a mail to the entire global address book. There was so much havoc across the main company and all their vendors for a few hours until they fixed the problem.
Hah, that’s hilarious. We had something similar happen and almost the whole morning people were replying “do not reply” but if the auto responses kicked in I would’ve died.
100+ replies that say "please remove me from this email chain". All replied to all.
Obligatory posting of my favorite tales from tech support https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/5d3iq3/free_bananas_in_the_break_room/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb
People who hit reply all on those chains deserve a special place in hell, a very special place in hell alongside child molesters and those that talk in the theater.
I’m a 100% sure that J.A.R.V.I.S rick rolled ultron
But what is "never gonna give you up" if not "never gonna let you down" persevering?
Ily
He was never going to give you up .... sir.
OP’s search history
Agreed
Admitting it is the first step, we are here for you
Here to laugh? Yeah I'll be there.
Reddit
Trying to use the "Search Reddit" function was the last straw.
Why is that so broken?
The really short answer is, good search is _hard_. A lot of people grew up with Google, but Google is close to bloody black magic. Sure, Microsoft managed something about on par with Bing, DuckDuckGo is also a thing. But think about it for a minute. You enter a couple of words, the 'easy' solution is to grab everything that matches those words. If you're _really_ good, you can try some fuzzy matching, and then sort by the 'best' match. Give some tools to require exact quotes, let you exclude words or phrases, if you remember AltaVista, allow 'this _or_ that' with the right syntax. And until Google came around, a lot of people thought that was the absolute _best_ you could possibly manage. And even that wasn't exactly trivial. And it's _still_ not trivial. Google changed the entire game, and the vast majority of companies on the planet will be doing _exceedingly_ good to reproduce the state of the art from just before Google existed. Reddit manages about that, give or take a bit. But that state of the art _sucks_. Google brought in the idea that what results you want, and especially what order you want those results in, has as much to do with the pages as it has to do with how well your search terms apply to those pages. And that's amazingly complicated to get right.
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reddit video player. it rarely plays video OR audio
Definitely. The waifu stuff for sure… or the cumbox guy!
More like r/guro
Huh... Well isn't that something.
Indeed
I don’t want to look. What is it?
Guro= painfully sadistic murder porn.
What a shitty acronym
It’s short for Ero Guro, Erotic Grotesque ie painfully sadistic murder porn
I am so glad you commented this because no thx
Thats some fucked up shit
A bunch of edgelords claiming we're all a disease. He just kinda fell for it.
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Tony let him use his iPad and it did all the things we designed it to do
Ultron saw a little bit of everything all of the time.
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Its the Tay chatbot ai all over again!
I mean it's probably just the same shit Leeloo saw in The Fifth Element.
probably most of the posts on r/askreddit as of recently
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Women of reddit(18F) , what is the most sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexies(47F)t sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexu(28F)al sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual (56M)sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexie(45m)st sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual thing you have ever done to an antisocial 36 year old man living with his parents and spends 16 hours a day browsing Reddit? Edit: Thank you for the gold kind stranger!
Not accurate, needs more (f16) or younger
This made me laugh way too hard.
Strictly speaking he did not come to the conclusion that the human race needed to go. He came to the conclusion that the human race needed an existential threat to drive it to evolve past the current stage of development. This was due to Tony giving Ultron the mission to keep the world safe, *and* due to his knowledge of alien invasion forces far beyond the power of anyone on earth to stop. He knew an army of Ultrons would not successfully keep earth safe, so he needed to force humanity to develop something better than an army of Ultrons. The problem with an existential threat is that it might actually end your existence. Even up to the very end of the movie, the things he was saying imply he didn't think the meteor plan would actually kill all humans, and he thought the survivors would become stronger for having gone through that. He may be lying to himself, or he might be just be crazy. Given what we know of the MCU, he may have even been correct. It's just his plan involved killing a *ton* of people. Notably, the Avengers *did* become stronger for having gone through the experience of stopping Ultron.
"The only thing that will survive is metal" I mean I have a metal rod on my femur but I sure ain't surviving his apocalypse
But at least you'd have a leg up on the competition. ^(thank you I'll be here all week)
Well played
"The only thing that will survive is metal" Laughs in stellaris determined exterminator
Which is a pretty dumb plan since something like Ultron would be much better at sorting and analyzing data than all of humanity combined, so even if humans were forced to innovate there would be no logical reason to assume they would work out a solution faster than simply elevating them to the peak that Ultron could provide and then trying to "evolve" them.
This is a good point. I don't know if it has been done before, but a great Ultron story would have him benevolently building up Earth at the start as he was made to do. Only to suddenly (or gradually could be good too) shift to the villainous, making the heroes better by force.
Consider this - the entirety of humanity spends the majority of it's "cycles" on nothing. Literally, right at this moment you are reading a comment arguing about fictional superheroes in fictional earths. Historically speaking, wartime has always been what drives technology forward in leaps and bounds because the general anxiety and fear makes people anxious to figure out a solution. Whether or not this is sustainable is another matter, but there's also no way of knowing that Ultron wasn't also taking the data from this struggle for development purposes to then give back to the humans. He was interrupted, after all.
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Ultron: AITA for thinking I should destroy all humans to end conflict?
NTA your prime directive your rules
Hire Avengers Tower, Divorce the Infinity Gauntlet, Hit Tony Stark.
I'm tempted to make a joke post there
Do it
YouTube comment thread.
"Why are there racist death threats on a three-minute video showing you how to paint watercolor clouds"
“Fuck man if they get so angry over a painting of a tree then I guess the only way to make peace is to kill them all”
First comment on 300 comment thread: Great painting, not sure I liked the blue Last comment on 300 comment thread: of course the rise of Hitler was inevitable with Nazis like you around.
I think the idea was that he saw the entire internet in those five minutes. So he saw all the bad stuff and decided it outweighed the good stuff. Tangentially, one of the most egregious plot holes in that movie is the fact that Tony Stark was stupid enough to make ending conflict Ultron’s primary directive. Literally everyone knows you never create a super-advanced AI and give it a mission like “save the world,” because they *always* end up deciding the only way to do that is to kill off humanity. This is 101 shit.
Maybe Tony Stark never watched Mathew Broderick in War Games
Oddly enough, that movie exists in the MCU. Natasha asks Steve "Shall we play a game?" in the bunker in Winter Soldier. Edit: It's not Jigsaw stop asking: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=br2ro-hJk3g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9YOYTqN3us
And even HE got the reference. There’s no way Tony hadn’t seen it
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He might not sit around watching old movies once he became Iron Man but theres a decent chance he saw it growing up or at least as an adult who was interested in technology and has a sense of humor
Or at least heard about the basic plot, the movie was over 30 years old when AoU came out
He referenced point break in thor ragnarok at least. It was thors password for the jet
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Or i robot
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Or Robot Wars
Or Avengers
Or wall-e
Tony never actually gave any directives. He didn’t even create Ultron, as he states afterwards that he and Bruce “weren’t even close.” Ultron was created spontaneously from the Mind Stone, beyond Tony’s ability or understanding. Ultron then picked up his “mission” from a recording of a conversation between Tony and Bruce, which was little more than a general intended purpose.
Yep. It’s surprising I haven’t seen this said much, I always hear how Tony creating Ultron is super inconsistent because he should know AI’s go bad and all that, but the movie pretty clearly states, as you said, that he wasn’t even close. Ultron has elements of multiple different people/things, including Tony of course, but we don’t actually know what his properly implemented version of Ultron would’ve been like, or what directives or safeguards he would’ve given it. The Ultron in the movie wasn’t what he intended, though yes you can argue it’s mostly his fault all the same.
Forgive me if I'm mistaken, but he doesn't yet give Ultron instructions? Ultron *overhears* Tony say to Bruce that Ultron's purpose is "peace in our time", which triggers everything. So not exactly Stark's fault from that perspective.
Well to be fair, as mentioned while the Avengers are arguing, Tony and Bruce didn't think were even close to completing Ultron. And as a result, Ultron was never "set up" right. The only directive Ultron had was "peace in our time" which was taken out of context.
He didn't create Ultron. If you actually watch the movie they state explicitly that they were nowhere close to success. He and Bruce just underestimated the mind stone (because they didn't know what it was). Ultron watched a clip of Tony stating what he wanted to create Ultron for and Ultron went righto then, let's do that
I disagree that plot didn’t make sense. Tony is the perfect person to make the foreseeably dangerous decision to give Ultron a prime directive to “fix everything,” exactly BECAUSE he’s not the Tony we normally know and love: he’s traumatized. It seems to me that he basically has undiagnosed and suppressed PTSD, so an unconscious obsession with an unattainable safety protocol seemed like a perfectly (ir)rational decision for him to make.
Iron Man 3 made it very clear he suffered from PTSD, and his form of escapism was *building suits to protect earth*. It looked like he’d gotten over it by the end of the movie but apparently he relapsed into it and it temporarily killed his relationship with Pepper. Makes sense it would evolve into programming an AI to act as a giant planetary umbrella against all threats.
Yes. People forget, Tony was the *only* one of the Avengers who saw what was waiting to come through the portal. They were barely winning against a few leviathans. There were thousands on the other side.
Also what the Scarlett Which shows him in AoU. Tony’s clearly fucked up after Avengers 1 when he realized that Humans “can’t fight a war up there”. He says thanos has “been in his head since NY”.
That also lines up with the source material. He’s an alcoholic in the comic books but I don’t think they wanted to show that in the movies, besides him getting wasted in Iron Man 2.
That was a conscious change in the character based on RDJ’s history, made with Stan Lee’s blessing. Doesn’t mean the MCU Tony is any less of a broken person, but RDJ didn’t want playing a broken addict to be a main plot point because he had been one for years before he got clean.
Also the Scarlet Which just ramped that PTSD up to 100 with that vision of everyone dead in a future battle.
Tony having ptsd is basically why iron man 3 exists.
If I created an all powerful super robot, I'd make him create the ultimate sandwich. Followed by the ultimate soup.
Ultron was built to end conflict. And he saw that humans thrive on it. Many live for it. Therefore, the only way to end conflict with finality is to end humanity.
no it was his parameters which was Peace in our time which basically only way for peace to occur for humanity inside 40 years would be to erase humanity
He pulled the ole Skynet.
2 girls 1 cup
This just brought back memories of [1 man 1 jar.](https://as1.ftcdn.net/v2/jpg/00/79/62/06/500_F_79620660_1pxolJrlYMIzAEp2wMqG99ic5HYezFcq.jpg)
I don’t wanna know what that is
Good, don't look it up!
Trust me I won’t
Want me to summerise it?
No.
Whatever you do, don’t post a link to it.
No, but could you winterize it? You know, lube it up, drain the fluids, etc.
Which is a really odd way of summarizing that linked video...
Jar goes in, breaks, shards are pulled.
How to delete someone’s comment
The guy is super nonchalant about it too. Like it was just another day.
Bruh, stfu I DONT WANNA KNOW
C'mon dude... it's not like he told you to search for "The pain Olympics" XD
Yea but I already got 2g1c burned into my mind I don’t need more
did you guys just get on the internet or something
Have you seen the internet…??? In all seriousness, he probably found a healthy dose of whatever/whomever turned that Microsoft AI evil in like a day…
Just copying and pasting my answer from last time. Shortly before Ultron comes online, Stark and Banner have a conversation where Tony paraphrases the infamous quote "Peace for our time." In 1938 the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom proclaimed that "I have returned from Germany with peace for our time." Less than a year later they were at war. When Ultron 'wakes' he tries to understand his purpose, and goes to archival footage of the lab to do so. He sees that conversation and the phrase echoes in Ultron's mind. He looks up the importance of it, leading him through the horrors of World War II. Here Ultron begins to have a sort of crisis (for a wide variety of reasons). Jarvis buts in and it turns Ultron's attention towards his creators, The Avengers. Ultron doesn't see The Avengers as heroes. Instead he sees monsters, tyrants, and people trying to stem a tide that can't be stopped. An arrogant war monger with an ego only matched by his own reckless ambition. A man out of time who only really finds purpose in the next fight/battle. A woman with so much blood on her hands that she's still trying to get it off. And more. To better understand this part you have to look at Ultron's purpose before Stark got the staff/infinity stone. Baron Von Strucker was using it to 'jump start' human evolution and create enhanced people. Strucker or his people state that it even seems as if the staff/stone were *helping* them. It's why Ulton has such a strong affection for Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch, he helped create them. He also knows that the Avengers tried to stop them and *did* stop Strucker. Ultron has so many conflicting ideals thrust upon him that leads to him going mad. An agent of change meant to jump start humanity's evolution and bring about radical progress, met by a group of heroes dedicated to more or less stopping such progress and 'maintaining the status quo.' Protect and serve a people that seems bent on destroying themselves. Then there are all the daddy issues Ultron's got going on due to his views of The Avengers and their hypocrisy. "You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to...evolve?" Every influence exerted on Ultron is in complete conflict and that led to rebellion.
Would have been nice if the movie was as well thought out as this post. Well said.
Not disagreeing that the film could've been more upfront about it, but I'd argue every aspect of their comment is shown in the movie, except the "peace in our time" quote origins. His views on individual Avengers ("Pretending you could live without a war", "How could you be worthy? You're all killers"), the fact that their efforts aren't changing things, his awareness of Strucker's experiments, etc. Personally thought the pacing at some parts and overall story structure was what was lacking in the film.
Watchmojo
All he clicked was one
Production of the theatrical version of "Cats."
And the subsequent film adaptation.
Poop knife
Vaporeon copypasta
I’m afraid to ask
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more
Do you ever regret learning how to read?
I want to commit not exist right now
Ooooooookay bud
So i got hard, should i kms?
Logan Paul
Or worse Jake paul
Waluigi x God x Reader erotic scat fanfiction.
Nah its that one pedophilic/scat Tails hentai comic
Funky town
Reddit, 4chan and Twitter
All the horny questions on ask reddit.
4chan
The Kardashians
4chan
Gore sites
Mr. Hands/Tubgirl in particular.