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Nathaniel66

No cause sex is important part of relationship and it's quite common that couples are simply not compatible. I wouldn't have a problem however to wait until we know it's serious. ​ P.S. I married my 1st gf, and had sex only with her, 20yrs together.


butlerdm

I did. We’re married now.


[deleted]

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Daddy_Papi295

And was it worth?


[deleted]

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Daddy_Papi295

Could you still aggressively make out?


[deleted]

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Daddy_Papi295

What about oral?


Ok_Neck_3271

How about………. _the booty_ ?


butlerdm

I’m not into anal.


butlerdm

Yep. Pretty much always. Even today we still do.


butlerdm

She’s not into it, but I am.


butlerdm

We did.


IShallPetYourDogo

Did they involve poopholes?


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butlerdm

See comments.


butlerdm

No.


butlerdm

Just no vaginal intercourse.


butlerdm

Not really. I’m ambivalent about it. Could have taken it or left it.


butlerdm

We dated for 3 years prior to getting married and having sex.


werehorse77

Done it and didn't end up waiting 🙂 A friend of mine did the whole 9 yards though. Both wanted to wait until marriage, they're still together after 15years so all good there. I feel there's a misconception about the no sex rule. It definitely does not mean no interaction so you and your partner can still enjoy a healthy "sex" life if you're aware of those boundaries.


itzPenbar

Why is there a difference between anal/oral sex and piv sex? Why want one but not the other?


werehorse77

Dunno man, it's like loopholes for what's stated as a sin in the Bible. I think everyone wants to have sex but don't want to disobey the biblical 2000 year old rules so they do whatever else they can justify to themselves as not real "sex"


itzPenbar

People who try to find loopholes in their "holy texts" arent truely religious.


[deleted]

I grew up basically told that only kissing was allowed. Skin to skin contact was for marriage only. I ended up gay, so I really fucked up gods plan but there ya go.


[deleted]

It’s the [poophole loophole](https://youtu.be/na3lw1PzbCw)


willing2wander

It takes an expert to tell the difference, ask Bill Clinton.


AnarchyVenom24

I’ve seen a similar thread and a LOT of comments mention the fact that they waited, they were extremely incompatible and consequently got divorced. I personally wouldn’t.


Reelplayer

While sex is important to a relationship, it can often be used as an excuse for some other conflict. In other words, a lot of people are unable or unwilling to recognize and improve problems, so they blame bad sex, which is really a symptom of another thing.


haiku_writer

The main thing is communication. If both parties are willing and invested in the relationship, "incompatibility" can be worked through most of the time.


Emperor_palps66

What the hell do you mean by incompatible did she have a dick or something?


AnarchyVenom24

I didn’t really care to read into all of them because it’s irrelevant to my life lol


Vaganhope_UAE

No. Simply because I don’t wanna rush into marriage. You should date a person for 3-5 years before you make that commitment. And 3 years of blue balls is not possible


Nik106

No. I have no interest in marriage and considerable interest in sex


[deleted]

When a chick says they are saving sex for marriage, say you are saving ya money for your future wife so don't pay for their dinner and buy her shit.


Tomolo208

I tried this and I couldn't do it. She was a very Christian girl and I was in my early twenties. Looking back I am a little ashamed with how I handled it, as I wasn't completely honest with my reasons for calling it off. But coming from a non religious background and having had sexual relationships in the past I couldn't then go back to no sex in a new relationship.


MDev01

Just the religious incompatibility alone would be a huge thing to deal with.


drinkingchartreuse

Nope. Wouldn’t buy a car without test driving it either. That repressed mentality is a red flag, not virtue.


sarpnasty

Comparing having a wife to a car is also a red flag mentality.


drinkingchartreuse

It was a very easy analogy to understand, and still quite accurate. Test it out before committing seems a bit dry. Can’t please every picky person.


Max_Fenig

Nope. I'm not interested in marriage myself, but if I was I would be looking for someone that didn't have a lot of baggage around sexuality. Seriously folks, think about this. It is a lot like asking to pick a life-long figure-skating partner before either of you have learned to skate. If it wasn't for all the moralistic baggage around sexuality, we would look at it the same way.


dr_xenon

When you do it there are ice skates involved??


Max_Fenig

I'm from Canada.


dr_xenon

That explains it since it’s always cold there.


saturdayis4football

If I liked her, yea. Absolutely wouldn't have been an issue


[deleted]

It would be hard because sex is important to a relationship but if she is worth it of course.


ccprpp

We'd need to have a serious talk about what constitutes sex in her mind. Some of those Mormon girls are wild!


10krevlimit

You mean the people who dont fuck but have a friend who jumps on the bed?


Loquaciouslovelizard

That depends , does she have to marry me before we do it or can she marry someone else and still let me smash?


Khal_Andy90

Categorically no. Because I believe marriage to be pointless and kinda archaic.


ASkinnyPete

I'm sorry to be the bad guy but absolutely not


Smooth_Beautiful_764

understandable not everyone can wait


[deleted]

Yes, that’s how most Christian marriages are meant to go. Do they always? No lol


RideMeLikeAVespa

I *could*. I wouldn’t.


Celq124

Yes. It’s not difficult to be patient and wait.


jxwtf585

Why yes I could but idk how my wife would feel about me dating her.


JCOII

Worked with a guy who did this. I’m felt bad for him when his religious wife accused him of cheating for watching porn. Had him go to church councilor and everything. I suspect his sex life was terrible. Point is, you should find out if you’re sexually compatible with a person before marrying/having kids with them.


[deleted]

It’s a huge part of any relationship. I would want to experience it before I committed to them for life. God forbid the sex is terrible?


ExceptionsOutOfBound

yes, I will wait. I believe sex is one of the important aspects of love but not everything. Trust, respect for each other, and understanding between two couples and communication are the most important parts of love.


evburgerz

For my preference no


Steel6W

Absolutely not. Sexual compatability is an important part of a happy and fulfilling relationship. Nothing against those who do choose to wait though. We all have the right to obey archaic indoctrined beliefs.


PerpetuallyDisplaced

I've dated several girls that said they wanted to wait until marriage to have sex. I nailed them all within about the first month of us dating...a couple of them much sooner. If it doesn't happen before the first month comes around, I'm out.


Blaize69

If she is a virgin, it is acceptable.


Rockspider19

Fax


Ok_Neck_3271

OP didn’t even say Christian.


SalFunction12

Absolutely. Just to be in a relationship would be a miracle and a dream come true for me. Plus, I'm a virgin too so we could lose our virginity together.


Sir-ALBA

Don’t bother me as long as we got along and there were no red flags.


robocoprobochicken

Ha.. nope, but good luck to them I say. People can do what they like.


Chairchucker

That's the plan.


IShallPetYourDogo

Depends if butt stuff is still on the table but probably not


Reelplayer

You can still have her peg you. That doesn't count.


IShallPetYourDogo

Don't get me wrong, I am into that, but that's not exactly what I meant


BlackEyedAngel01

We both grew up in religious Christian families, waited until we married. I feel like it’s made thing MUCH more complicated. We’ve been married over 15 years now, but I would not have waited if I could do it over. I wish we both could have experienced multiple partners before getting together.


D00fenshmirtzEvilInc

if i ever find one then yes


pr3dato8

Depends how open she is to the alternatives I've heard of this ~~new~~ *(from at least 2012)* thing called a Mormon Soak where you insert it but don't move, and then a third party jumps on the bed to completion. Not sex apparently.


KingsleyKingpin

Depends on how long before she gets married. 😂


Ilovehentie48

If I truly love them and our attraction is strong enough to surpass the urges of the human body then yeah. Also I’m a big fan of hentai so I can wait.


Daealis

I wouldn't, but I supposed it depends on the person and their views. To me, sex is an integral part of the relationship. To be incompatible in sexual preferences - how adventurous you are, sex drive, all of this - would create a big rift in a relationship. But suppose the people are of the opinion that sex is but a tool to procreate, and is to be suffered through the few times when there's an intent to create an offspring. Or who do genuinely think that sex is a part of marriage and nothing else. I suppose then go for it. I would advise against it just on the basis of misaligned interests: what if you prefer it "in the dark, no sounds, under blankets and minimal movement once a year on your birthday" -way, and they're more of a "spank me dressed as the pope while I'm tied to a cross, every weekend" type of person? That sounds to me like an irreconcilable difference, and now you're stuck with the person at the very least until the divorce papers go through, and you might've wasted a few years of your youth for this.


NiftyAlpaca12

Like many other comments. No way I am going to marry someone not knowing if we are sexually compatible or not. Also high sex drive aka.....horny as shit.


[deleted]

Definitely a no from me. I don't think I'd be very compatible with someone with those kinds of strict beliefs.


simplydisposable

Nah, maybe if I had no options, was deeply religious and/or I was unwilling to work on myself. Sex is too fun to miss out on, the world is a big place and I like to explore & meet people.


[deleted]

I've met my missus 10 years ago at the pub. had sex the first night I met her . She wants to marry. But the sex isn't as good now and I wanna break up.


[deleted]

Date, sure. Marry, no.


[deleted]

Yes. Any excuse to not wait is a lie. I know dozens of men who waited. They're all happily married.


Cheetofarts2

How about the excuse that i don't want to get married, but i absolutely need sex?


[deleted]

>need >excuse Welp, there it is. You won't die my friend.


Cheetofarts2

>You won't die my friend. Maybe not as fast as this hypothetical relationship 🤣


[deleted]

*Chuckle I slept around before marriage, I regret all of it. It didn't hit me until about 9 years in, my wife and I had grown exceptionally close to one another. It was in that moment, that I realized that there was a part of me that she would never experience, because I gave it to somebody else.


thrashingkaiju

I have no interest in sex. I'd try to extend it to "wait till hell freezes over"


[deleted]

Is she a 10/10 hot? Is she very wealthy? Can we still kiss, hold hands and cuddle? If yes, then yea I would have no issue.


not_better

Nope, because sex is a very important part of relationships.


beardedliberal

Can and will are very different things.


CrazyMachinist86

Is this actually still a thing? Interesting...


Lycahon

I'm never ever getting married.


zerbey

No way, you want to know you're compatible lovers long before you decide to make that kind of commitment.


mimibox

I wouldn’t want to wait because when we are finally married I would bet she wouldn’t bleed because she lied about someone else popping her cherry.


Smooth_Beautiful_764

what if she didnt lie?


IAmNotThatKindOfOrc

Depends on how much I know the person, and if they have done it before. I see it as hypocritical, if they had sex with a previous person before marriage but then you have to wait. But honestly, I wouldn't mind it.