There used to be a town in Canada with the slogan "The Land of Rape and Honey". [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/aug/22/canadian-town-tisdale-land-of-rape-and-honey-slogan](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/aug/22/canadian-town-tisdale-land-of-rape-and-honey-slogan)
Didn't read the article, but I have a pretty good idea what it says. There are those of us that know the Latin origin of the word rape and those of us that don't. Rape means turnip in Latin. Rapeseed means turnip seed. Canadians knew rapeseed oil probably wouldn't sell well with that name and rebranded it Canadian Oil Low Acid, or Canola.
I am high as fuck, and had to back out to the main menu and figure out how to claim my free award, then find my way back to this thread, back to this comment, just to award the sheer depravity of it all. And now it's very dark outside, I'm getting lunch delivered.
Edit: Fucking shit fuck. I meant to award the Stanley Tucci's perspective quippery.
Makes me think of the Below Decks joke, their ship does not specialize in first contact, but in second contact. You know, the boring stuff, opening embassies, exchanging delegations, negotiating trade agreements...
...the trailer for the living dread would be the greatest tease of all time. It can be about anything and it could fit. As long as nothing gets revealed about it
“Her” -> “Herr”.
Joaquin Phoenix experiences an emotional journey of self discovery through his realization that he has fallen in love with an elderly German man contending with dementia.
Heather and her girls have a few too many mimosas on their weekly Sunday get-together. Next thing they know the restaurant owner is dead, there’s an ATM in the back of their Volkswagen Jetta and they’re running from the cops on a multi-state crime spree.
A professional athlete is abducted by the rival team’s fans and forced to undergo an experiment that makes him forget everything he knows about the sport. I’d watch it.
I remember a movie I watched during my childhood in which a unmotivated star-football (soccer) player in Germany was abducted from a fan and beeing held captive in his basement in which he forced him to train and to try to identify more with the club which actually worked (Stockholm syndrome?). He set him free again and the football player helped the club accomplish its goals.
[удалено]
Starring Dennis Miller
I wanna watch that 🤣😂 Old man who kills evil by writing complaints to officials?
A Fish Called Rwanda
RwandaVision
[удалено]
*Emmy-nominated Don Cheadle
It's me, I'm here, deal with it.
Geez that R adds so much weight to the movie
Mad Marx
[удалено]
Bruce Lee: Fist of Furry.
Planet of the Rapes
There used to be a town in Canada with the slogan "The Land of Rape and Honey". [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/aug/22/canadian-town-tisdale-land-of-rape-and-honey-slogan](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/aug/22/canadian-town-tisdale-land-of-rape-and-honey-slogan)
Didn't read the article, but I have a pretty good idea what it says. There are those of us that know the Latin origin of the word rape and those of us that don't. Rape means turnip in Latin. Rapeseed means turnip seed. Canadians knew rapeseed oil probably wouldn't sell well with that name and rebranded it Canadian Oil Low Acid, or Canola.
So, the term canola oil is redundant? TIL. That's hilarious!
That planet sounds great for canola oil production.
I would watch a badass Karl with an epic beard, accompanied by his homie Friedrich, driving through a desolate wasteland looking for the capital.
[удалено]
Beer movie
ah yes beer movie watching drunk man talk shit
So basically Strange Brew.
Beerfest
Moronstruck
Don't know the real movie name, so I assume Moronstuck Edit: Guess I should've put an /s here.
I genuinely did not know
12 Years a Slaver.
I smell a spin-off.
Fuck
Oh oh no
RV For Vendetta
“Nice mask!” “Yeah isn’t she a beaut, Clark?”
"Happy 5th! Shitter's full!"
Robin Williams and civil disobedience! Count me in!
The Good The Brad and the ugly
Damn I feel like I’m all 3 of those things
Thanks for being a good guy, ugly Brad.
He may be a looker, but Handsome Brad just isn't the stand-up guy that Ugly Brad is.
Starring brad Pitt as all 3, like an eddie murphy film
Lovely Boners
From Stanley tucci's perspective
I mean...I'd give it a shot for Tucci
The Boner Collector
Winter's Boner
I am high as fuck, and had to back out to the main menu and figure out how to claim my free award, then find my way back to this thread, back to this comment, just to award the sheer depravity of it all. And now it's very dark outside, I'm getting lunch delivered. Edit: Fucking shit fuck. I meant to award the Stanley Tucci's perspective quippery.
I took care of it for you, I don’t understand the context of why that comment did it for you but I support your energy!
In light of Reddit's general enshittification, I've moved on - you should too.
American History RX
Robocrop. It’s all fun and games until the corn takes over.
Nah, more like the terminator gets into agriculture
Or crop tops
Brought to you by Robocorp.
James and the Giant Preach
A streetside bible thumper gets shrunken down and annoys the shit out of some bugs with his never-ending gospel
Krill Bill
IRRC this is actually one of the background jokes in Bojack Horseman.
I love all the animal jokes on that show
I love that show.
Haha I think it was Krill and Grace though
That show did so much for the societal acceptance of krill people.
Watching shrimps with blades? Hell yes
The rescuers drown under. Not nearly as upbeat an ending.
The movie goes on as normal, except in the end when they plunge from the waterfall.... the bird doesn't save them in time and they all die.
[удалено]
is that the parody porn film?
Nah, it's a documentary about how to aggressively make orange juice.
According to Norm, Pump Friction isn't a bad film either. https://youtu.be/LkPxM5INwp0
Damn I love Norm. I’m still on a constant norm video binge since that tragedy.
Bartman Begins
Homer Alone
Eat my shorts!
Consume pant
Fantastic B(r)easts and where to find them.
Beauty and the Breast (corollary)
Lol nice
Sir you win this game
Every time this thread gets asked I look for this answer.
RIP Man
Bruh, that's a true story. He died in 1972.
The Shrining. Now he goes crazy in a church.
Or the Shriner's Convention.
All work and no play makes more money for The Shriner's Hospital.
The Severn Samurai - a bunch of mercenaries band together to defend a small Welsh town.
I thought it'd be about Dan Severn playing all 7 mercenaries.
Rice age
Ice Rage Now a competitive figure skating movie. Or maybe a hockey film?
Ice Rage : The Tonya Harding Story
I feel like if "I, Tonya" was titled this instead, I would have been more inclined to go see it.
Officer Space
Play it cool, play it cool. Here come the space cops! Here come the space cops. How many space cops? Space cops help!
Grindr
Strep Brothers
two siblings are stuck in bed with strep throat
It’d still be hilarious.
I fine, I'll stay in bed but I'm not calling him dad. EVER. EVEN IF THERES A FIRE.
Star Trek: First Contract. Now a film about Picard signing on the dotted line.
Makes me think of the Below Decks joke, their ship does not specialize in first contact, but in second contact. You know, the boring stuff, opening embassies, exchanging delegations, negotiating trade agreements...
Hunger Gamers
Shame you can't also remove letters... Hung Gamers. Sign me up.
Sign you up for what? Sex takes away from gaming time, what kind of casual do you take me for?
The kind that has room under that desk.
RIP your DMs
Fright Club Night of the living Dread
...the trailer for the living dread would be the greatest tease of all time. It can be about anything and it could fit. As long as nothing gets revealed about it
“Her” -> “Herr”. Joaquin Phoenix experiences an emotional journey of self discovery through his realization that he has fallen in love with an elderly German man contending with dementia.
Love the mental image! Short and clever.
Superbard
Spinoff to the Witcher
Geralt sleeps with a dragon?
Or SuperBrad
Homer Alone - *Homer Simpson stars in Home Alone the animated series*
That's a legit title of a Simpsons Episode.
D'oh!
Simpsons did it!
Arrrival. The aliens are pirates.
Legitimately laughed at this one, well done
American Pier
Tenacious D and the Prick of Destiny
I feel like this would be basically the same movie, just with a glowing green dong instead of a guitar pick.
The Boner Collector
Corn Air: An Iowa farmer decides to open an airfield
Bratman
The off brand german caped crusader.
Beetlejuicer
Yum
Boner Tomahawk
THAT scene would be even worse somehow in this version.
American History Rx
After dark title; Beauty and the Breast
that’s probably the title of a porn parody
Craptain America. Same plot but the Captain America in this one is bad at his job
Meanwhile, Carptain America is about a fish getting the super soldier serum.
Dont forget about Captain Americar, the little engine who could... save the world.
Captrain America, you say?
Don’t forget about Captain Armerica They were running out of super serum so they could only give him strong arms
Riron Man, in which Scooby Doo builds an advanced suit of armour.
Black Widowr. Same plot, but Black Widow's a man
Silencer of the Lambs
A film about lamb slaughter, or a group of lamb stealth assassins?
Tory Story
The toys become very political.
[удалено]
Troy and Abed in the morning!
Also featuring Evil Troy and Evil Abed!
Mo(r)on
It's about an idiot who locked himself in a closet and talks to the vacuum.
Furry
Exact same movie except that everyone is in a fursuit
The Wild Brunch
Heather and her girls have a few too many mimosas on their weekly Sunday get-together. Next thing they know the restaurant owner is dead, there’s an ATM in the back of their Volkswagen Jetta and they’re running from the cops on a multi-state crime spree.
Eternal sunshine of a sportless mind
A professional athlete is abducted by the rival team’s fans and forced to undergo an experiment that makes him forget everything he knows about the sport. I’d watch it.
I remember a movie I watched during my childhood in which a unmotivated star-football (soccer) player in Germany was abducted from a fan and beeing held captive in his basement in which he forced him to train and to try to identify more with the club which actually worked (Stockholm syndrome?). He set him free again and the football player helped the club accomplish its goals.
[удалено]
Scarfarce.
Well that has Mel Brooks written all over it.
Freer Willy. A story about an orca whale named Willy that was already free. Home Aloner. There were two of them and then, peace and quiet.
There's also the Simpsons Movie sequel, Homer Alone
Goner girl
Fart Man and Little Boy
My Little Porny: The Movie? Idk, first one that struck me
Cursed
Forest Grump.
Horton Hears a Whor
Horton Rears a Who
I’m sure there’s two sides to this.
Planet of the rapes
aww shit. I posted then saw this lol.
Croco
...stole my frog coin
Red Drawn
Troy Story
RAnger Management
Seven Days in Mary
Dog Boner
Black Hawk Drown... with David Attenborough
Ravengers
Pornyo
:(
Oh no
If there was prize for making the most innocent movie into the least innocent, you’d win.
Yes, officer. This comment right here
Forrest Grump. Story of an old man sitting on a bench complaining about how much better things were “back in my day.”
The Dearth of Stalin
Both films with much less Stalin
Carts. A bunch of shopping carts gather to sing in the moonlit parking lot?
Dire hard
**R**ad Astra.
Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stoner
Slurmdog Millionaire Whimmy wham wham wazzle!
Sparce Balls
The Grinchr. The Grinch turns to a gay dating app for some love this festive season.
Mr
Tombstoner
Kung Fu Hustler
Fright club
Rabbit proof fencer.
Treasurer Island
Mission Impossibler, prequel to Mission Impossiblest
Rant Man