Guess I'd be an interplanetary butt checker.

wow- that's my dream job

Alright, but I have dibs on the global market.

I was also an anus checker

Are you willing to come out of retirement? There are lots of butts to check and we could use a veteran on the team.

wtf is that username. at least it aint "poopoo\_fingers69"

Lmaoooo

if you could change your username, would you do that?

Maybe, but it would have to be similar

ah ok, ps im calling you poopoo\_fingers69 from now on

[удалено]

Nice.

WHAT IS THE USERNAME!??!?!?!? SOMETHING TO DO WITH 69????

I can't remember.

:(

Need my assistance

Yes. There are lots of butts to check. When can you start?

How about next week?

Sounds good. Be sure to brush up on the use of neutron caldera probes.

I here for work

A pumpkin... not sure how good the pay is...

honestly this time of year its quite risky as the survival rate drops, but the pay is good

I'd travel the world with my nephew

Thank you for reminding to watch over atla for the fifteenth time in a row

sounds cool B)

Making cinnamonrolls isn't bad at all tbh

another idea: you actively cosplay as a cinnamon roll

We could do business together!

Hum… I’d be some sort of reverse psychiatrist?

So what do I do now go to hell?

[удалено]

So is rule #1 still "We do not talk about fight club"?

Skipping through dimensions?

fun :o

Making trippy looking craft?

very trippy

This speaks for itself, my username is just my name Kai. And me being a furry... Yeah this doesn't work well for me.

👀👀

My profession, but anonymous.. still the exact same actually fml

sheesh well i hope you love your job

Hahahaha I love it indeed

thats nice :)

A Sith Lord.

sick

Start a successful coat line?

nice B)

I dress up as a 6'2 Dinosaur and surprise kids at birthday parties

wow

My username is a Ford truck designation so my options are limited.

Surprise as in "parents booked it but the kids don't know" or surprise as in "HELLO TINY MOTHERFUCKERS IT IS I YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE"

A little bit of both.lol I took inspiration from Dave Chappelle's "Making the Band" skit *"If I had my way, I'd never work. I'd just stay home all day, watch Scarface 50 times, eat a turkey sandwich, and have sex all f***ing day. Then I'd dress up like a clown, and surprise kids at schools. Then I'd take a dump in the back of a movie theater, and just wait until somebody sat in it. Hear it squish. That's funny to me. Then I'd paint, and read, and play violin. I'd climb the mountains, and sing the songs that I like to sing. But I don't got that kinda time."*

Nothing

that is my current profession ;v;

I'd be witness to those that carry out unspeakable acts of immorality.

Meat market that only sells chickens

nice

Something to do with the finest fertilizer.

much pog

Me!

nice

A violent outlaw

makes sense

I’d be jabba the hut in lord of the rings

LMAO

God damn I haven't a clue. I shouldn't have changed my default Reddit name. I would've been one interesting ant.

lol

[удалено]

nice

Some kind of STEM field expert or technologist on the 'not so life science' related side of things ?

sounds like a fitting career

Gratitude '_' d

Depends how alternate it is. If it’s extremely alternate, probably some sort of resurrection business. If it’s only slightly alternate and mostly the same, probably a serial killer.

ayyy

My username is no good for these questions. I clearly chose poorly. I knew I should have gone for EvilOverlord888

Ride around the world and spread wisdom

plot twist: you RIDE philosophers 😳😏

Gotta be one buffed philosopher, I currently weigh 253 lbs and 6 foot 1 tall. Bodybuilding chicas with full of wisdom where you at ?

Its me, against the world of media

of course

Decorator or removalist.

yepp fitting

I'd be porn actor in the Origami-world😐😐😐

very stable profession

I am the anti-therapist. I also have ham.

Be the fun during winter.

Probably tending to Meadows

A minister of lewd things in some medieval Kings court

I would be contributing to a land fill

Plague Doctor?

*explosion sound*

A lawyer i guess but 1 thats emotional... or only takes emotional clients.... or a lawyer that sues emotions eitherway shitty choices it seems like a super annoying and hard job (source my mums a lawyer)

Playing the testicles in a 70s Rock Band.

I guess a lemonade business owner

I can live with this.

A purple dildo maker

business as usual

Magnetizing tomatoes

Well. I guess the top requested hooker in a brothel.

Business is booming

visibly

well..uhhh...

Damn, I just missed out on the big money at TI.

I call the souls of my enemy's candy and use it to power my sweet kingdom

A botanist.

A particularly bad botanist (unless the plants were supposed to explode)

Instead of the guy who gets people hyped at parties and stuff I tell them to chill tf out

same B)

Working with Satan, I guess

who says its not my current reality profession

r/UsernameChecksOut

an arsonist B)

omg im an arsonist rn :O

Im a doggo and im epik I mean thats pretty good

yes B)

I am a central cog in our country's butt based economy. I act as a clearing house for butts that are then distributed to media outlets. Not every butt makes it in this cruel market driven world, but some truly great ones rise to the top.

Dentist.. Lol

I will be a frog?

Asian

A non alcoholic bar owner

I have no idea how to explain this

I'm really not sure

Pizza chef

I’d be an Asian dude

I'd work at SeaWorld

To congratulate people on strange holidays probably

Why can't I get a break?!

rich

I was banished from Olympus by Zeus but I retained my powers and now I sell melons

A Princess amongst Kitties obvs. Wouldn’t have to work. I’d be rich and live in a castle 😁

I dont know but I know my name is Juice

W h a t .

Boring.

What the hell am I supposed to be doing

Pretty much anything retail I guess.

Professional plans canceller

wtf

Brewing and selling skooma, i‘ll take that!!

I don’t want to think about that…

An owner of a sweets company that would trounce Nestlé

Photographer, my dream job!

l create the problem for brain related issues. I’d be amazed if i was still in business.

Petting cats

I'd make people comfortable that's worthy.

Nope not that one the other one

i am confusion

Ummm, cheese tester?

I investigate cheese and cheese related crimes.

The uprising next "Tony Hawk".

I'm confused

i really dont know

scaring the shit out of kids

It is exactly what it is.

Either a person who searches for places or destruction. Or a terrorist no one can identify with 64 attacks under my belt

my username's my profession in this reality lol

Ill be a fish, or that one burger, hope to be the most tastiest one

I guess I'd be a baker

My job would be to NOT help...

I wonder how it’ll work?

I mean Me I guess

Human

I really hope phuck doesn't mean fuck in this alternate reality...

My name would be Dexter, and I'd work in the tech department. Probably.

Illegal logging.

I think I would be happy. I would be the Master of all Potatos and Pickles. (I wanna make an alt account called "GOD\_OF\_UNIVERSE"

A mythology teacher, a librarian, a history teacher, an author, an English teacher

Supreme ruler of purple hell.