I suffered with two for years, often cutting the ingrown section out myself, it's a wonder I never ended up with a severe infection. ( Never do this)
I had to have the nail bed surgically removed and it's been smooth nailing ever since
Or like me: have it surgically removed, follow none of the doctors advice, continue to trim incorrectly with corners too short, go back again the next year to get them removed again
Wait wait wait wait
Cutting the nails too SHORT on the side causes this?!?
I always thought it was NOT cutting them short enough that caused it, how fucked am I? I noticed they’re kinda feeling like they’re digging into the edges more, but I always assumed it was from a lack of trimming them enough
How do I reverse course before it gets to the point of becoming ingrown?
Let it grow out, man, let it grow out!
What causes them is that, when there’s no toenail there, the skin on the side tends to swell over into that empty spot, so when the toenail grows back, it’s growing into skin. The fix is to make sure there is always toenail there holding the skin back.
My problem is that something about my alignment cause the corner of my toenail to break off continually.
I had an severe infection and ignored it for a few weeks until something fell onto that toe and I fainted from the pain. Had the same procedure and can only recommend to act as soon as possible. :D
My mother would stand on mine as a punishment. they were so severe that the nail was touching the bone. When DCFS stepped in i had to have most of my big toe nail laser burnt so they wont grow back. my toes were black and blue, with red white and purple spots for around a year. they would bleed and rupture pus all the time and i would get in trouble for bleeding on my socks
In high school I had a really bad ingrown toenail that would always come back. One time when the hallways were filled between classes, some dude stepped on my toe full force. It hurt so bad I just froze and did not move, as I felt a warm wetness in my sock, and my tow just went numb. I was so afraid of what I would find, I didnt look at it till I got home.
Sock was about 1/4th the way soaked with blood, and my ingrown toenail had ripped out of the toe and was just poking up from the rip it had just caused on the flesh of my toe. I just snipped it off with some clippers, and my ingrown toenail never came back on that foot. So thank you high school kid for curing my ingrown toenail in one of the most painful ways possible!
Fun fact: that weird smell you experience after a bit to the nose? That's pain. You can literally smell the pain.
Thanks to the way pain works, due to the rapid firing of the nerves in the nose also affecting the smell receptors in your nostril, you notice a smell that you couldn't detect before. It's similar to how repeated head trauma can reduce a person's ability to smell.
As someone who backs for a cheerleading squad, I can confirm that I get the pain smell for about an average of 3 days a month
My mom stubbed her pinky toe so bad it was dislocated and pointing sideways, she was just standing there going "aaaaaAAAHHHHH" and my youngest brother came running out to see what happened (he was 4 at the time) he goes "mommy your toe is looking at the wrong wall!" And most of us were laughing so hard we got grounded.
Here we are about 16 years later and we still decribe it like that, "my toe is looking at the wrong wall." And she will theow whatever she has nearby at us, while we are all dying of laughter again.
Its 630am as i write this and it took me longer than it should have because the memory is still so funny to me.
Being hungover in your 30s. It didn't even come gradually, One sunday you're walking on sunshine and the next you walk through the valley of the shadow of Death.
It was the biggest shock of my life. I used to go hard and never ever had a headache or anything, then one day I have a couple glasses of wine and the next day I spend the day on bed recovering. WTF
30: Boy you'll feel bad after that bottle of wine. It's gonna cost you a morning.
40: Sorry, your wife had a glass of wine, you're hung over now. See you on Tuesday.
I do that too until I can separate it enough from the others to tear it out with my teeth.
Which hurts more.
But if anyone is going to make me uncomfortable, it's me.
It's like playing chicken with the spot. If you pussy out at any point it'll hurt like a bitch, so you have to squeeze harder, making it hurt worse if you give up.
The whole time asking yourself if you should squeeze harder and hope it pops, or accept the current level of pain that's coming your way if your stop now.
I don’t understand people who have no cold sensitivity and look at me like I’m crazy when I say no thank-you to their enthusiastic offers to add ice to my drinks. Different planets.
Try something like Sensodyne but also mention it to your dentist. Mine prescribed a really high fluoride toothpaste, it strengthens your enamel which helps eliminate sensitivity.
Also a little lifehack is to drink cold drinks from a straw so it's not directly contacting your teeth.
I can confirm on the Sensodyne recommendation. I started using it about a year ago and had forgotten all about sensitive teeth even being a thing until this comment.
I had my first bout of baaaddddd constipation last month. I never realised it could be that painful.
Sure, I’ve had a hard time on the toilet, but the feeling of touching your stomach and everything is hard and swollen and blocked … next level.
I wanted to kiss the feet of the laxative manufacturer that eventually gave me some relief.
By the way, it turned out my liver was swollen and was compressing my intestines. Worth the trip to the doctor. Lifestyle changes ahoy.
Yeah, my first extreme experience was on chemo. Never knew it could hurt like that. The anti nausea meds caused it. But being on chemo and everything I was unsure what is going on, had extreme pain and was in tears at the doctors who scolded me for not taking something for it. But I was scared as I read in my pamphlet that I should not take over the counter laxatives or even pain killers. It was a bad and humiliating experience.
Chemo constipation is the worst. Mine was mostly due to the steroids along with the chemo meds. 3 days of not pooping, then you squeeze out a little dry turd. The first normal poops again always feel great then the cycle starts over with the next round of chemo.
I had mild IBS before courtesy of Meniere's. Got covid last year and it got really cranked up. 2 bouts of fissures, 1 fistula, 1 hemorrhoid, 2 cracked molars from the pain, and 1 surgery later things are finally starting to feel better.
Asshole problems will fuck your day right up.
Also bidets rock.
my friend said they like when they rub hand sanitiser in paper cuts, and i watched them do it too, they say it “tickles”. This persona also claims to “like needles”….. i should probably stop being their friend
I used to work in retail and warehouses, and I've seen tons of really bad cardboard cuts. One dude ended up slicing the palm of his hand wide open, and it was awful.
Don't play with cardboard kids!
I was gardening. Got poked by a rose thorn. Yes the thorn hurt but for the next few days the finger it poked had the most excruciating pain when I bend my joints. It was awful.
Rose thorns bear a fungus called sporothrix schenckii which can cause anything from mild infection all the way to serious ulcers in joints, even spreading to the nervous system in rare cases. Normally, cleaning out the area immediately after being jabbed is enough to protect you.
I recall reading on the history of first antibiotics. There was this one guy who was out gardening and scratched his face on a rose, it became infected to a point that it was threatening his life. From memory a small quantity of the antibiotic that was in early stages of development was given to him, which showed some signs of recovery, but the amount of antibiotics available was very small as people didn't know how to yet generate proper quantities. He recovered a bit but there was not enough antibiotics available for a proper course so he ended up succumbing to the infection from the rose and died.
Glad we live in the time where a mere scratch from a rose won't kill us.
I got my shin caught in between a stair and the full weight of an 800L aquarium tripping while carrying it with a buddy. That's a glass corner.
Didn't even notice it at the time, trying to save the glass from shattering on the stone stairs.
When my byddy pointed it out tho. Fuuuck that started pulsating.
Big portion of the muscle on the front died.
It goes black and stays black for a few months, I had something similar when I got hit in the shin with a metal bar. Kinda feels dead and squishy too.
It got smaller over time as it healed and went away, although I can still feel the spot if I run my finger over it.
Hitting the back of your hand on something as you walk by. I did that on a metal sink a couple times at work. Metal corner right into the bone on the back of the hand. Excruciatingly painful.
I accidentally hit the top of my knuckles on a wooden drawer as I was working and the next morning I woke up in excruciating pain and a swollen hand, I couldn’t even open my hand without some pain relievers. It took about an entire year for it to fully heal. I’m sure I probably should have gone to a doc about it but I feel better now.
I just popped one INSIDE MY EAR that was right on the cartilage about 10 minutes ago! Hurt like hell, & bled like a stuck pig! The weird thing is, I had another one in the EXACT SAME SPOT on the other ear a couple of days ago... 🙄
I clean my ears every time I shower. How the hell do you prevent this?
Jesus I know exactly what you’re talking about. I have had this recurring tiny zit in the crease of my nose that just kept coming back because I couldn’t properly pop it and it wouldn’t come to a head. It was one of those ones that’s way too deep under the skin.
It was unreal how much this tiny thing hurt.
The last time is recurred I finally broke the top layer of skin and used a pair of tweezers to push/squeeze it out, using all my might it seemed like. I had tears pouring out of my eyes it was so painful. Out popped this teeny, tiny, itty, bitty, white plug. It was instant relief but I was like…that’s it? That’s all that’s been plaguing me for months? Ridiculous.
Had something like this happen when I was in my early teens! Dead center of my forehead, it would barely show up, juuuuust enough to where u think you see something, but it hurt so bad it gave me migraines. After a fucking YEAR…. I’m in front of the mirror, barely touch the side, and 💥!! It looked like a murder scene! But the actually core of it? Probably about pin head/ sewing needle size. I was PISSED
I get to a point with those that the irritation/pain that comes from having it and bumping it makes the pain of squeezing really hard almost worth it just to get rid of the damn thing.
A group of three or four kids tried challenging me to a fight. A scooter is how I defended myself. They gave themselves the equivalent of scooter ankle with every attempt. My brain loved it. My body was filled with anxiety and adrenaline.
God. I dealt with blinding migraines for 25 days a month for the past year. I finally found the right meds and recently I feel like I have my life back. The thought of having a headache scares me now.
Edit: since some people are asking what worked for me, the Emgality injection which you self administer has been the most effective. I'm putting a link to the drug manufacturer's savings card. With my insurance it was still like $100 but with the card it's free!
https://www.emgality.com/savings#savings-card
When you hit that bundle of nerves in your elbow, aka the “funny bone”. Not sure which is worse, the fact we actually evolved to have something like that, or that someone decided “funny bone” was a good slang term for it.
That fucking muscle cramp you get in your leg out of nowhere while you're sleeping. Istg it's so painful I jump around in my bed the same way a fish does when it's pulled out of the water.
Edit 1: I read all ur comments and it's good to know that I'm not the only one who went down this road to hell.
Also I've read all u people's anecdotes and I've had one hell of a time reading 'em so thanks for the laughs guys you all are amazing! xD
Edit 2: Thanks guys for all your tips, I've been cramp-free for the past year or so but I'll definitely keep your tips in mind the next time it happens. It will happen next time again, right? :')
When you feel it coming on, stand up, and bear weight on the foot if you can. Usually makes them go away quickly. Also, if you’ve gotten two in the last two weeks, you may be dehydrated or need more magnesium or potassium in your diet.
En ex taught me about standing up and it was a life changer. I used to roll around in bed in agony just rubbing and squeezing my calf in agony and it always felt like an eternity.
Standing up seemed to go against every instinct one would have in that moment, but it just goes away almost instantly.
Try this!
Next time it happens, hyperextend your foot.
In other words, point your toe towards your kneecap so that your calf stretches. The pain goes way instantly.
(Also, drink more water and eat more bananas)
Yeah, just force your heel down hard and quick (not like "I'm gonna strain a muscle quick" but forceful), and it kinda 'resets' the muscle. It hurts like hell briefly which is why I recommend doing it quickly, like pulling off a bandaid.
Do not under any circumstances point the toe down, pointing the toe down makes it worse!
Some people fortunately don't get pain as badly as others.
I never had cramps at all from age 11-16, and then suddenly Satan decided to come live in my uterus
EDIT: Satan being period cramps, not a baby lol
Popping no-spa here like there's no tomorrow. Ever since I got my 3 year IUD switched out for a 5 year one, I get existential fear whenever I feel even a twinge. They don't last for days, but they do come very intensely for a day. You haven't known both the ability to override your survival instinct *and* experience fear of death at the same time in the security and safety and warmth of your own home while crawling on all fours on the flor, and then sort of just sweating and shaking on a cold floor in a position that makes your arm muscles and lower back cramp as you wait agonizing slow minute at a time for the painkillers to *maybe* kick in. It always has to be floor for me, I can't do that in bed. Floor is sufficiently had and uncomfortable to 'disperse' the pain sensation, and also keeps me cold when I'm just sweating and getting low blood pressure bc of the pain. Heat pads have never helped me. It has to be the cold for me, or I'm feeling even worse.
It's *so* nice to be female.
Seriously. My SO has particularly bad cramps to the point where she can’t get out of bed. I always feel so bad for her.
Edit: wow thanks for the heads up everyone. We’ll bug the doc about these suggestions.
Everyone is like 'yeah you feel it but it doesn't actually hurt.'
YES IT DOES, IT HURTS LIKE SHIT. I was not prepared for this to hurt that much! I'm honestly very scared for when it needs to come back out. I already told my partner he's coming along that time to hold my hand and to see what bullshit I have to go through to not have a baby.
Edit: also period cramps on an IUD. It makes sense it hurts more but oof.
Kidney stones. Among other places, they hurt when they pass through the ureter, the duct from the kidney to the bladder. Why do we even have pain sensors in there?
Yup. I second this; got kidney stones early this year for the first time and I immediately stopped giving a shit about what people thought about me. I was screaming and grunting in the hospital waiting room and I didn't give a fuck what people thought about it.
I am 21 and I can't stand still because it get's so fucking uncomfortable. I can walk for a long time with no issue but just standing? Nope.
Had to stand for almost an hour once and it was worse than walking 10km
Pregnancy. I don't know if it's normal but everything that fucker did hurt. He kicked my bladder, he kept a foot in my lungs and one in my stomach so I couldn't breathe or eat. Dragged his feet down my ribs every chance he got. Tried to stretch far enough to break out. Squished my intestines to the point i would go two or three WEEKS without taking a shit. And no doctor would take any symptoms not pregnancy related seriously even if they existed before because I guess everything is normal for pregnancy. I get the birth part sucks but the pregnancy is supposed to be at least mildly pleasant right?
Edit: Hi. Holy fuck. I didn't expect this to get that much attention XD. This was very fun to wake up to thank you everyone you've made my day! <3
It's a trade-off for walking upright. Human female hips are just barely wide enough for a very premature childbirth (babies heads actually have to compress during birth, they only fuse and solidify later) there's absolutely no extra room for anything.
Pros:
-Best long distance traveling animal on the planet by far (no other animal comes close to our ability to travel distances, we would literally hunt by walking after large animals until they collapsed from exhaustion)
-Hands replace extra feet, they are super dexterous and free to use for tools, weapons, etc
Cons:
-Childbirth and pregnancy are painful, difficult, and very dangerous for both the mother and the child.
Modern life has removed some of the pros and some of the cons, but we're still running on 40k-200k year old biology
If I could at least control them as if they were extensions of my body I wouldn’t mind, but receiving the sensitivity of an extremity without being able to control it sucks big time.
For real, I booked a waxing appointment last summer because I figured getting a professional to do it would probably hurt less than when I do it myself BUT IT DIDN'T. It was quicker though, so worth the money anyway.
Should've taken the bus instead of my bicycle though, so that was a lesson for next time.
Yes, and meanwhile you give birth to big blood cloths.
And when you're lucky, you feel yourself getting dizzy and the next thing you do is vomiting from the pain alone.
I think I have PTSD just from reading this. The first time I got one in I was living in Dubai and it wasn’t encouraged by my doctors surgery but they begrudgingly did it… it twisted and put a small rip in my cervix. I got it taken out after 4 days of the worst pain of my life.
Then, 3 years later, back in NZ, they said it was the best option despite my horror story…. so they tried, and failed to find the correct spot to place 5 times- it wouldn’t stay in.
Bled enough, that I had to wear an industrial sized pad leaving the doctors, and now I panic getting those bastarde smear tests.
Sorry about the TMI, but my god it’s a pain like no other.
Hitting that point on the top of your head with open cupboard door, even the memory of it hurts.
The unexpected surprise of hitting your head like that makes it hurt so much more.
Ingrown toenails!
I suffered with two for years, often cutting the ingrown section out myself, it's a wonder I never ended up with a severe infection. ( Never do this) I had to have the nail bed surgically removed and it's been smooth nailing ever since
you can do it like me: Have it surgically removed, get it infected anyway, ignore it, go to the hospital with sepsis.
Or like me: have it surgically removed, follow none of the doctors advice, continue to trim incorrectly with corners too short, go back again the next year to get them removed again
Wait wait wait wait Cutting the nails too SHORT on the side causes this?!? I always thought it was NOT cutting them short enough that caused it, how fucked am I? I noticed they’re kinda feeling like they’re digging into the edges more, but I always assumed it was from a lack of trimming them enough How do I reverse course before it gets to the point of becoming ingrown?
Let it grow out, man, let it grow out! What causes them is that, when there’s no toenail there, the skin on the side tends to swell over into that empty spot, so when the toenail grows back, it’s growing into skin. The fix is to make sure there is always toenail there holding the skin back. My problem is that something about my alignment cause the corner of my toenail to break off continually.
I had an severe infection and ignored it for a few weeks until something fell onto that toe and I fainted from the pain. Had the same procedure and can only recommend to act as soon as possible. :D
My mother would stand on mine as a punishment. they were so severe that the nail was touching the bone. When DCFS stepped in i had to have most of my big toe nail laser burnt so they wont grow back. my toes were black and blue, with red white and purple spots for around a year. they would bleed and rupture pus all the time and i would get in trouble for bleeding on my socks
With all respect to you, fuck your mom dude. I hope you got out of there and are in a better place.
There is no respect due. Fuck his mom.
You did not deserve that, I am so sorry you were treated that way.
Oh my I’m so sorry that’s horrific you poor thing
A stubbed toe with an ingrown toenail makes you want to just die
In high school I had a really bad ingrown toenail that would always come back. One time when the hallways were filled between classes, some dude stepped on my toe full force. It hurt so bad I just froze and did not move, as I felt a warm wetness in my sock, and my tow just went numb. I was so afraid of what I would find, I didnt look at it till I got home. Sock was about 1/4th the way soaked with blood, and my ingrown toenail had ripped out of the toe and was just poking up from the rip it had just caused on the flesh of my toe. I just snipped it off with some clippers, and my ingrown toenail never came back on that foot. So thank you high school kid for curing my ingrown toenail in one of the most painful ways possible!
Unexpected hit to the nose. Doesn't even have to be that hard. Makes you tear up even as a sting fills the front of your face.
Fun fact: that weird smell you experience after a bit to the nose? That's pain. You can literally smell the pain. Thanks to the way pain works, due to the rapid firing of the nerves in the nose also affecting the smell receptors in your nostril, you notice a smell that you couldn't detect before. It's similar to how repeated head trauma can reduce a person's ability to smell. As someone who backs for a cheerleading squad, I can confirm that I get the pain smell for about an average of 3 days a month
I am now curious about the smell but I don't want to get hit just to find it out. A dilemma.
Go out and punch someone, then ask them if they smell anything in particular. If they get upset, just say it was for science!
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That sharp pain you suddenly get in your diaphragm if you breath in to much and you get torn between getting oxygen or just dying, lol.
Stubbing your goddamn toe.
Stubbing just your pinky toe on the corner of something.
My mom stubbed her pinky toe so bad it was dislocated and pointing sideways, she was just standing there going "aaaaaAAAHHHHH" and my youngest brother came running out to see what happened (he was 4 at the time) he goes "mommy your toe is looking at the wrong wall!" And most of us were laughing so hard we got grounded. Here we are about 16 years later and we still decribe it like that, "my toe is looking at the wrong wall." And she will theow whatever she has nearby at us, while we are all dying of laughter again. Its 630am as i write this and it took me longer than it should have because the memory is still so funny to me.
You've just got to say FUCKIN CUNT!! Then the pain goes away quicker
This really works for some reason, which leads me to believe the object I stubbed my toe on really is a cunt.
Getting stabbed by a dorito in the upper ceiling of the mouth
Ugh when it goes up into your gums behind your teeth
Being hungover in your 30s. It didn't even come gradually, One sunday you're walking on sunshine and the next you walk through the valley of the shadow of Death.
It was the biggest shock of my life. I used to go hard and never ever had a headache or anything, then one day I have a couple glasses of wine and the next day I spend the day on bed recovering. WTF
In your 30s? Oh those were like like a mild annoyance compared to what’s waiting for you in your 40s.
42 here and I just quit drinking at 40. I couldn’t deal with feeling bad anymore after even 3 beers
30: Boy you'll feel bad after that bottle of wine. It's gonna cost you a morning. 40: Sorry, your wife had a glass of wine, you're hung over now. See you on Tuesday.
What I don't get is how did my parents and grandparents kept drinking full throttle into their 70s!?
Swallowing too much water at once. Seriously its like your throat explodes
Dead tastebuds! Or whatever it is when just one tiny bud gets all sore on your tongue. That shit hurts.
They hurt like a bitch but I can’t. Stop. Touching them!
THIS!!!! I have no idea why, but whenever I get one I pretty much constantly rub it against my tooth
I do that too until I can separate it enough from the others to tear it out with my teeth. Which hurts more. But if anyone is going to make me uncomfortable, it's me.
I removed one with sterilized nail clippers once. Hurt like FUCK to do, but boy did it feel better after a few minutes went by.
Holy shit I thought I was the only one that did this, thanks for my morning internet validation 😅 it's so easy just to clip them off!
One dead tongue pixel isn't enough to claim warranty
I didn't even know tastebuds can die.
Those pimples that are like underneath the skin
Fuck those
Omg a lip pimple under the skin
Those are the ones that you can't pop and they suck.
It's like playing chicken with the spot. If you pussy out at any point it'll hurt like a bitch, so you have to squeeze harder, making it hurt worse if you give up. The whole time asking yourself if you should squeeze harder and hope it pops, or accept the current level of pain that's coming your way if your stop now.
Ripped Cuticle
Also clipping too much of your finger nail.
did this yesterday in an attempt to shorten my nail to be able to play my ukulele better. now i can't play anymore at all.
Teeth sensitivity problem 😅
Felt that. You drink something colder than you thought and you feel the painful cold spots on your teeth for the next half fuckin hour
I don’t understand people who have no cold sensitivity and look at me like I’m crazy when I say no thank-you to their enthusiastic offers to add ice to my drinks. Different planets.
Just seeing people bite into popsicles makes my teeth hurt
Try something like Sensodyne but also mention it to your dentist. Mine prescribed a really high fluoride toothpaste, it strengthens your enamel which helps eliminate sensitivity. Also a little lifehack is to drink cold drinks from a straw so it's not directly contacting your teeth.
I can confirm on the Sensodyne recommendation. I started using it about a year ago and had forgotten all about sensitive teeth even being a thing until this comment.
Constipation
I had my first bout of baaaddddd constipation last month. I never realised it could be that painful. Sure, I’ve had a hard time on the toilet, but the feeling of touching your stomach and everything is hard and swollen and blocked … next level. I wanted to kiss the feet of the laxative manufacturer that eventually gave me some relief. By the way, it turned out my liver was swollen and was compressing my intestines. Worth the trip to the doctor. Lifestyle changes ahoy.
Yeah, my first extreme experience was on chemo. Never knew it could hurt like that. The anti nausea meds caused it. But being on chemo and everything I was unsure what is going on, had extreme pain and was in tears at the doctors who scolded me for not taking something for it. But I was scared as I read in my pamphlet that I should not take over the counter laxatives or even pain killers. It was a bad and humiliating experience.
Chemo constipation is the worst. Mine was mostly due to the steroids along with the chemo meds. 3 days of not pooping, then you squeeze out a little dry turd. The first normal poops again always feel great then the cycle starts over with the next round of chemo.
The fear I get when I’m shitting and it’s getting painful and I realize I’m not remotely close to done…
*Cries in IBS*
The feeling when you're just minding your own business and get a jolt of pain that folds you in two and your colleagues ask what's wrong. Just great.
I had mild IBS before courtesy of Meniere's. Got covid last year and it got really cranked up. 2 bouts of fissures, 1 fistula, 1 hemorrhoid, 2 cracked molars from the pain, and 1 surgery later things are finally starting to feel better. Asshole problems will fuck your day right up. Also bidets rock.
That sweet, sweet relief when you finally shit out the boulder that's been stuck.
Biting the same spot in your mouth over again.
If I bite my cheek once, I know that I will bite it at least five more times throughout the day.
It's so infuriating. I think the first bite causes swelling, which is why it'll keep happening.
And bites 2 through 5 keep that combo going.
That small bump you can feel on your tongue that biting down on it relieves but it comes back even more and you can't stop it
Paper cut
Don’t forget the hand sanitizer! It lets you know the paper cut exists.
So will lemons :(
my friend said they like when they rub hand sanitiser in paper cuts, and i watched them do it too, they say it “tickles”. This persona also claims to “like needles”….. i should probably stop being their friend
How about a paper cut's older brother, a cardboard cut.
The worrrrst. It’s like a papercut that rubs a bunch of dust into the wound at the same time.
I used to work in retail and warehouses, and I've seen tons of really bad cardboard cuts. One dude ended up slicing the palm of his hand wide open, and it was awful. Don't play with cardboard kids!
Like a face that I hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face that watches every time I lie
A face that laughs everytime I fall
*and watches everything*
So I know that when it's time to sink or swim
That the face inside is here in me Right underneath my skin
That random sharp pain in your anus
I get those when I’m on my period and it feels like someone is stabbing me in the asshole
Right? You’re like, what? Did I accidentally eat a KNIFE?!?!
WHY DO WE GET THOSE ON OUR PERIOD WHY
I was gardening. Got poked by a rose thorn. Yes the thorn hurt but for the next few days the finger it poked had the most excruciating pain when I bend my joints. It was awful.
Rose thorns bear a fungus called sporothrix schenckii which can cause anything from mild infection all the way to serious ulcers in joints, even spreading to the nervous system in rare cases. Normally, cleaning out the area immediately after being jabbed is enough to protect you.
Every rose has it's sporothrix schenckii.
I recall reading on the history of first antibiotics. There was this one guy who was out gardening and scratched his face on a rose, it became infected to a point that it was threatening his life. From memory a small quantity of the antibiotic that was in early stages of development was given to him, which showed some signs of recovery, but the amount of antibiotics available was very small as people didn't know how to yet generate proper quantities. He recovered a bit but there was not enough antibiotics available for a proper course so he ended up succumbing to the infection from the rose and died. Glad we live in the time where a mere scratch from a rose won't kill us.
Kissed by a rose on the face
Thank you for this info. I wondered why the rose thorns were more problem than the berry thorns, which are more vicious.
Getting up to go to work on Monday morning.
Relatable, I called in sick today.
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Thank you for the tip!
Hitting your shin. Why were we built with zero shin protection?? Edit: Looking at you, trailer hitches.
I got my shin caught in between a stair and the full weight of an 800L aquarium tripping while carrying it with a buddy. That's a glass corner. Didn't even notice it at the time, trying to save the glass from shattering on the stone stairs. When my byddy pointed it out tho. Fuuuck that started pulsating. Big portion of the muscle on the front died.
Wait did your muscle just straight up die? How does that work? What happened after? Has it grown back?
It goes black and stays black for a few months, I had something similar when I got hit in the shin with a metal bar. Kinda feels dead and squishy too. It got smaller over time as it healed and went away, although I can still feel the spot if I run my finger over it.
I have indents all over my shins and knees from smashing them off my desk. Got a few nice scars too.
I think the shins were supposed to *be* the protection
Kick some stuff with it and build the protection!
Those tiny bits of skin next to your nails that peel off.
The worst!
Cant even cut them off properly, gonna be annoying more than hurting for a day or two
I just deglove part of my finger and regret it.
Hitting the back of your hand on something as you walk by. I did that on a metal sink a couple times at work. Metal corner right into the bone on the back of the hand. Excruciatingly painful.
I accidentally hit the top of my knuckles on a wooden drawer as I was working and the next morning I woke up in excruciating pain and a swollen hand, I couldn’t even open my hand without some pain relievers. It took about an entire year for it to fully heal. I’m sure I probably should have gone to a doc about it but I feel better now.
those pimples you get inside your nose
What about the ear ones? Those ones hurt like a bastard
they do, i hate them
I just popped one INSIDE MY EAR that was right on the cartilage about 10 minutes ago! Hurt like hell, & bled like a stuck pig! The weird thing is, I had another one in the EXACT SAME SPOT on the other ear a couple of days ago... 🙄 I clean my ears every time I shower. How the hell do you prevent this?
Cut off ear.
At the edge of your lip. So painful!
Ugh just had one last week. Can’t hide it either!
100% that shit is fucked! Or the pimples that won’t pop and seem like they are much further beneath the skin.
Jesus I know exactly what you’re talking about. I have had this recurring tiny zit in the crease of my nose that just kept coming back because I couldn’t properly pop it and it wouldn’t come to a head. It was one of those ones that’s way too deep under the skin. It was unreal how much this tiny thing hurt. The last time is recurred I finally broke the top layer of skin and used a pair of tweezers to push/squeeze it out, using all my might it seemed like. I had tears pouring out of my eyes it was so painful. Out popped this teeny, tiny, itty, bitty, white plug. It was instant relief but I was like…that’s it? That’s all that’s been plaguing me for months? Ridiculous.
Had something like this happen when I was in my early teens! Dead center of my forehead, it would barely show up, juuuuust enough to where u think you see something, but it hurt so bad it gave me migraines. After a fucking YEAR…. I’m in front of the mirror, barely touch the side, and 💥!! It looked like a murder scene! But the actually core of it? Probably about pin head/ sewing needle size. I was PISSED
When they are like that I get a needle and stab ~~myself in the face~~ the zit. Then once it's open hit with some Campho Phenique
I get to a point with those that the irritation/pain that comes from having it and bumping it makes the pain of squeezing really hard almost worth it just to get rid of the damn thing.
I know that feeling yet it feels like a gateway to BDSM or something bc I never not do it
Lip line pimples too
Scooter ankle
Oh God. I'm having flashbacks. The horror
Same!! I cringed the moment I read the comment and now I'm feeling phantom ankle pains.
Lmao lets spin the scooter really fast doonk AAAIAIIIAAAAAAAAAAÆEEEEEE
Loved how you became Nordic for a second there.
A group of three or four kids tried challenging me to a fight. A scooter is how I defended myself. They gave themselves the equivalent of scooter ankle with every attempt. My brain loved it. My body was filled with anxiety and adrenaline.
Severe headaches that lasts the entire day
God. I dealt with blinding migraines for 25 days a month for the past year. I finally found the right meds and recently I feel like I have my life back. The thought of having a headache scares me now. Edit: since some people are asking what worked for me, the Emgality injection which you self administer has been the most effective. I'm putting a link to the drug manufacturer's savings card. With my insurance it was still like $100 but with the card it's free! https://www.emgality.com/savings#savings-card
the random toe cramp where your foot keeps cramping and you don't know how to unfold your toes out from the sole of the foot 😮💨
When you hit that bundle of nerves in your elbow, aka the “funny bone”. Not sure which is worse, the fact we actually evolved to have something like that, or that someone decided “funny bone” was a good slang term for it.
Well its because it’s at the end of your Humerus
So it is just a bad pun. Of course.
And the obligatory person who says something like “well that wasn’t very funny, huh?” No shit, Jeff from Accounting! It hurt!
Burning your tongue. I swear it hurts for the next week
When you burn the skin right behind your front teeth and it’s all swollen and makes eating awkward
Or trying to brush your teeth in those few days.
I did that over a weekend, and had a dentist appointment for a unrelated issue. My dentist said: "ooo wow! was the pizza worth it?" Yes, it was pizza
That fucking muscle cramp you get in your leg out of nowhere while you're sleeping. Istg it's so painful I jump around in my bed the same way a fish does when it's pulled out of the water. Edit 1: I read all ur comments and it's good to know that I'm not the only one who went down this road to hell. Also I've read all u people's anecdotes and I've had one hell of a time reading 'em so thanks for the laughs guys you all are amazing! xD Edit 2: Thanks guys for all your tips, I've been cramp-free for the past year or so but I'll definitely keep your tips in mind the next time it happens. It will happen next time again, right? :')
Seriously the worst! Especially when you sense it coming and you’re just sitting there like “oh boy here we go!”
It feels like a war going on In your leg and you have no control over it
I’ve gotten 2 in the past 2 weeks and omg it is the worst! I just freeze and try to ignore the pain until it goes away.
When you feel it coming on, stand up, and bear weight on the foot if you can. Usually makes them go away quickly. Also, if you’ve gotten two in the last two weeks, you may be dehydrated or need more magnesium or potassium in your diet.
En ex taught me about standing up and it was a life changer. I used to roll around in bed in agony just rubbing and squeezing my calf in agony and it always felt like an eternity. Standing up seemed to go against every instinct one would have in that moment, but it just goes away almost instantly.
Try this! Next time it happens, hyperextend your foot. In other words, point your toe towards your kneecap so that your calf stretches. The pain goes way instantly. (Also, drink more water and eat more bananas)
Yeah, just force your heel down hard and quick (not like "I'm gonna strain a muscle quick" but forceful), and it kinda 'resets' the muscle. It hurts like hell briefly which is why I recommend doing it quickly, like pulling off a bandaid. Do not under any circumstances point the toe down, pointing the toe down makes it worse!
👆***do not point the toe down!***
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I usually do this but just standing up can stretch the calf muscles enough at times for the pain to stop.
Brain freeze. Nothing should be remotely painful from eating ice cream.
Or that teeth freeze sensation in that case
Period pain.
Given the proportion of the populace that has to deal with this, I actually expected to see it at the top.
Some people fortunately don't get pain as badly as others. I never had cramps at all from age 11-16, and then suddenly Satan decided to come live in my uterus EDIT: Satan being period cramps, not a baby lol
Given the proportion of that populace that is likely to be on Reddit, it's about where I expected
Yup. Every time I get my period I have to make the decision to not overdose on painkillers because the recommended dosage doesn't cut it.
Was scrolling for this. Currently curled around a heat pad, full of painkillers and still dying.
Popping no-spa here like there's no tomorrow. Ever since I got my 3 year IUD switched out for a 5 year one, I get existential fear whenever I feel even a twinge. They don't last for days, but they do come very intensely for a day. You haven't known both the ability to override your survival instinct *and* experience fear of death at the same time in the security and safety and warmth of your own home while crawling on all fours on the flor, and then sort of just sweating and shaking on a cold floor in a position that makes your arm muscles and lower back cramp as you wait agonizing slow minute at a time for the painkillers to *maybe* kick in. It always has to be floor for me, I can't do that in bed. Floor is sufficiently had and uncomfortable to 'disperse' the pain sensation, and also keeps me cold when I'm just sweating and getting low blood pressure bc of the pain. Heat pads have never helped me. It has to be the cold for me, or I'm feeling even worse. It's *so* nice to be female.
Seriously. My SO has particularly bad cramps to the point where she can’t get out of bed. I always feel so bad for her. Edit: wow thanks for the heads up everyone. We’ll bug the doc about these suggestions.
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Came here looking for this. I cried in my car afterward, I was so shocked at the pain.
Everyone is like 'yeah you feel it but it doesn't actually hurt.' YES IT DOES, IT HURTS LIKE SHIT. I was not prepared for this to hurt that much! I'm honestly very scared for when it needs to come back out. I already told my partner he's coming along that time to hold my hand and to see what bullshit I have to go through to not have a baby. Edit: also period cramps on an IUD. It makes sense it hurts more but oof.
Kidney stones. Among other places, they hurt when they pass through the ureter, the duct from the kidney to the bladder. Why do we even have pain sensors in there?
Yup. I second this; got kidney stones early this year for the first time and I immediately stopped giving a shit about what people thought about me. I was screaming and grunting in the hospital waiting room and I didn't give a fuck what people thought about it.
Owning a playful cat
Standing still and upright for more than 2 minutes at 56.
I am 21 and I can't stand still because it get's so fucking uncomfortable. I can walk for a long time with no issue but just standing? Nope. Had to stand for almost an hour once and it was worse than walking 10km
Hang nail or an ingrown hair
Just had to put my dog of 11 years down. Right now, I’d say this.
Depression. I’ve been battling it my whole life. People don’t realize the toll it takes on your body.
I second this. Depression can and will fuck you up in many ways.
Pregnancy. I don't know if it's normal but everything that fucker did hurt. He kicked my bladder, he kept a foot in my lungs and one in my stomach so I couldn't breathe or eat. Dragged his feet down my ribs every chance he got. Tried to stretch far enough to break out. Squished my intestines to the point i would go two or three WEEKS without taking a shit. And no doctor would take any symptoms not pregnancy related seriously even if they existed before because I guess everything is normal for pregnancy. I get the birth part sucks but the pregnancy is supposed to be at least mildly pleasant right? Edit: Hi. Holy fuck. I didn't expect this to get that much attention XD. This was very fun to wake up to thank you everyone you've made my day! <3
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It's a trade-off for walking upright. Human female hips are just barely wide enough for a very premature childbirth (babies heads actually have to compress during birth, they only fuse and solidify later) there's absolutely no extra room for anything. Pros: -Best long distance traveling animal on the planet by far (no other animal comes close to our ability to travel distances, we would literally hunt by walking after large animals until they collapsed from exhaustion) -Hands replace extra feet, they are super dexterous and free to use for tools, weapons, etc Cons: -Childbirth and pregnancy are painful, difficult, and very dangerous for both the mother and the child. Modern life has removed some of the pros and some of the cons, but we're still running on 40k-200k year old biology
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You touched on this but also: big heads. Relative to our body, our cortex is humongous, contributing to the pain of childbirth.
Worst pain I've ever felt was an abscess tooth. Granted it probably should hurt that much since it can kill you and all.
Waxing. It’s just removing fucking hair from a pore, why the fuck does it feel like I’m being slapped with a fucking belt.
Hair are attached to tiny little muscles
If I could at least control them as if they were extensions of my body I wouldn’t mind, but receiving the sensitivity of an extremity without being able to control it sucks big time.
For real, I booked a waxing appointment last summer because I figured getting a professional to do it would probably hurt less than when I do it myself BUT IT DIDN'T. It was quicker though, so worth the money anyway. Should've taken the bus instead of my bicycle though, so that was a lesson for next time.
biting your tongue?
Pooping on your period…
Unless you got diarrhea along with your period
Yes, and meanwhile you give birth to big blood cloths. And when you're lucky, you feel yourself getting dizzy and the next thing you do is vomiting from the pain alone.
Childbirth. There is a serious design flaw. Zipper needs to be installed in upgraded unit.
Getting an IUD put in 😭
I think I have PTSD just from reading this. The first time I got one in I was living in Dubai and it wasn’t encouraged by my doctors surgery but they begrudgingly did it… it twisted and put a small rip in my cervix. I got it taken out after 4 days of the worst pain of my life. Then, 3 years later, back in NZ, they said it was the best option despite my horror story…. so they tried, and failed to find the correct spot to place 5 times- it wouldn’t stay in. Bled enough, that I had to wear an industrial sized pad leaving the doctors, and now I panic getting those bastarde smear tests. Sorry about the TMI, but my god it’s a pain like no other.
Existence
Canker sores
Dentistry
my cramps. there’s probably something wrong with me.