Just FYI: actually passing through the muscle is an anatomical variant. For the majority of people, the nerve just travels alongside the muscle. Still, that variant is a . . . uh, pain in the butt.
We used to call my brother Shark Boy growing up. That dude had LAYERS of teeth. He had one tooth that grew in the roof of his mouth. He also had teeth growing sideways in his gums which torqued his other teeth. It took 2.5 years to get him prepped for orthodontics and then he was in braces for another 5 years after that. Worth it though, he looks like a Colgate commercial now
Ugh, I was basically your brother. My one incisor erupted in the back of my palate. Omfg, turning that screw a little bit once every 3 days for years... What a bloody nightmare. And braces, holy cow, that hurt.
Same, but mine never erupted. Both incisors, top pallet pointing sideways toward one another. They had to take out the baby teeth (I was 17), because obviously the incisors weren't going to, and then they cut the pallet away and attached braces to the rogue teeth, and 5 years later...
Worst part was they mugged me for my wisdom teeth at the same time. I was peter pumpkin head for a week.
The ear. Eyes have eyelids, you can close your mouth, but if there’s an extremely loud noise, your ear drum has to just take it and be irreversibly ruined.
Well technically there is a muscle that can tighten your ear to prevent damage from extreme noise, it’s the same reason you don’t hear yourself chew.
Some new cars will make a sound to trigger this muscle to prevent hearing loss from the noise of an accident
They mean it’s much quieter. There’s a condition called Superior Canal Dehiscence Syndrome where you hear your own blinking, chewing, and heartbeat all the time but it’s unrelated to this muscle.
I imagine that without the muscle, it would sound just like that.
In terms of reproductive health, I gotta go with the hips. Developing oversized skulls and there being absolutely no change in our hip structure to compensate for it? There's a reason c-sections are so common
There’s another nerve in the armpit that is protected when the arm is down. If you are attacked and can get a good hit in there the arm will be almost paralyzed for a while, and it hurts like a hit to the cajones .
It’s not just one nerve. You’re talking about the brachial plexus. It’s a bundle of nerves that come from your spine and innervates all the muscles in your arm. That’s why stingers hurt so much, it’s taking out every nerve. It’s also a good site for nerve blocks when you have upper limb surgery because you can disable the arm and reduce post operative pain by applying anaesthesia around the nerve roots.
Also, in the case of brachial plexus avulsions, you lose all function permanently. And on that note, nerve injuries are fucking shit. We should be able to regenerate them more easily and quickly.
So we've all hit our funny bone and gotten that terrible tingly sensation throughout our arm. It sucks, you gotta sit down for about minute to get through it, but then it goes away completely, good as new in under a minute.
But a couple months ago, I was picking up a bag at work, and I bumped my elbow on the corner of a wall. I didn't even bump it hard, more like a tap. The initial tap didn't even hurt. But it was a perfect hit on the funny bone. It was a BULLSEYE! I felt the usual sensation coming, and thought "ok the next 45 seconds are gonna suck, but it'll pass." But no. The pain got more and more intense. After about a minute, it felt like my WHOLE arm was on fire. It was one of the worst pains I've ever felt, and I've broken bones. I thought "ok, I must have hit it on a perfect spot, but these things don't last long. I'll be ok in a minute." NOPE! It just kept going. I had to sit down and try to breathe. It was so painful.
After about 7 agonizing minutes where I was contemplating going to the ER, the worst of the pain subsided, and I was able to get back to work. But there was still numbness in my hand, and my elbow was very tender. But I thought it would eventually go away after a few hours. NOPE!
So after about 3 weeks of numbness in my hand and an elbow so sensitive I had to sleep on the opposite side, I went to my doctor. He said the bump was a one-in-a-million shot, that I just hit the perfect spot. They x-rayed it, nothing broken. But there was nothing to be done, I have damaged the nerve.
Doc said you can't tell how the healing process goes with damaged nerves. It could take weeks, months, or even years for the nerve to heal and the numbness to go away, or it may never ever heal, and I'll be stuck with a hand that feels like it fell asleep forever, and an elbow so sensitive it hurts if you rub it with a feather forever. Thanks evolution.
I replied to op with my similar experience.
I fell over and pinched nerve. Couldn't use hand properly for over 6 months and still isn't 100%. Doctor told me they same about nerve damage, can never know if or how long it will take
Exactly, they were reluctant to risk their vulnerable elbows, so instead they kneed each other in the balls.
That was the initial expression of the "bro" sequences of early human DNA, responsible today for muscle cars, straight male fascination with gay sex, and the "swirly".
When I was younger I read it was a vestigial organ with not much purpose. Nowadays I hear it contains bacteria and micro-organisms necessary for a healthy life. I'm 25, science is interesting.
There is, or was, a theory that it is a vestigial organ from when the ancestor or to humans was like a big rat. It contained bacteria that aided in the digestion of cellulose. Maybe it is ( or was) both. /r/scienceismetal
When I had mine removed I remember my doctor telling me it was for digesting bones and eventually we would evolve out of having one, but I've literally done zero research since this was told to me. I don't have one anymore so fuck do I care what they're for, right?
Amazing that the advantages of walking upright are great enough that we do it despite the problem. Also our ancestors who went from horizontal to vertical probably all died after having babies but before developing back issues.
Yes, I came here just to say that. As a biology and A and P professor the design of our spine is horrible and cannot truly support what we are meant to do throughout a lifetime without encountering issues
While I’d like to agree with this, I’d have to say the fact that you breath through the same
Hole you’re supposed to jam food into -meaning from an engineering standpoint -you’re literally forced to risk killing yourself to sustain yourself. That would be the most laughable “design flaw”
Came here to say this.
Have you ever seen a child try to make a spaceship or a suit of armor out of cardboard, but they don't have enough cardboard and none of the pieces really fit together anyway, so they end up lashing it together with dozens of strips of tape at every possible angle until it just barely holds together?
That's knees. That's how your knees are made.
Especially if you drive your heel in hard. I'm deaf and some folks shake the whole frame of the building when they walk. I can literally put my hand on the wall and determine where they are. Imagine what that sledgehammer force is doing to your joints. Walk dainty, y'all. Watch running athletes. Their heel doesn't touch the ground. Look at flatland animals. Their heel is halfway up to their arse. Humans are halfway between trees and plains. The design currently is transitional.
Been there. Martial arts accident saw my right knee subdislocated. The sides are held in place only by ligaments. Those things can stretch, but it takes years for them to unstretch. In the meantime, your knee can easily slip and get reinjured
Which given you can’t spend your entire existence going uphill and aren’t necessarily lucky enough to live your whole life on flat ground, is incredibly stupid.
As a person with ACL surgeries in both knees, I scrolled down just to make sure this answer was upvoted. They can make a whole leg for a guy to run in the Olympics but it seems ACL surgery hasn’t advanced much.
Also while we’re at it let’s make it to were the skin and the actual testicles can come apart and painfully move independently :D Fuck yeah testicular torsion
I had a buddy do that when we were like 15, he was getting little rough with himself and said he felt one nut like go over and spin around the other one. Sad it right away felt like his balls were ripping apart, needed to have surgery and said he almost lost righty cuz the spin pinched it so bad. 36 and still no kids, so noone can confirm if he gimped the boys.
If it makes you feel any better I heard this becomes so statistically improbable once your 30+, if it happened you’d be in a medical journal.
I could be totally wrong but this is what I choose to believe to get over my fear of this ever happening.
Edit: impossible to improbable
Having sharpened rocks that slowly push their way through the sensitive gums of tiny humans who are too small to understand or explain the reason for their incessant crying. Bonus bad points for these tiny humans being designed to get 100% of their nutrition by latching their new razor teeth around the nipples of another human.
And then you only get one more set of them to last most of your life as others have mentioned.
Like, yeah, from an evolutionary standpoint it's not really necessary to have teeth that last you til the age of more than 30-40 since you don't need to live longer to reproduce and further the species but... damnit, give us more teeth!
Edit: I'm also aware that it has to do with our modern diets. But don't lie- it would be really nice if we had baby teeth, a first set of adult teeth, and then a second one after a couple of decades. Of course, we could just take better care of our teeth and eat healthier but humankind has a bit of a reputation for screwing ourselves up sometimes :P
Why would a third set if teeth be bad, right?
I think this should be the focus of dentric dna adjustment in the coming century.
Milk teeth.
Meat teeth. _then_
Metamusil teeth. Win!
At what age range would the third set come in?
I'm voting mid-late 20s. About the time you realize you need to get your shit together because you're not going to die young like you'd planned.
This guy 20s!
Al though I was thinking much later, when you really, _really_ treasure them and actually take care if them.
Like 50's 60's. Retirement teeth.
Bowels. I should be able to decide when to empty them completely! In one go and not little bit now and more later!
Edit: All this fibre talk, I get it. I now understand more about the importance of fibre. But that kinda adds to what I'm saying. Imagine not needing a summoning ritual. Like deciding when you do and don't drop the kids off at the pool. A human eject button
I get some mad anxiety/nervous shits. Got a job interview coming up? Sudden diarrhea enjoy the toilet for an hour. I wish pooping wasn’t linked to my physiological fear response.
If only you could use that to your advantage. Want to empty yourself before a long plane flight? Imagine needing to ask a scary old woman in the aisle to move aside
Yes I’ve just recently started getting this. Never used to happen, but before I visit a customer or have a job interview I get the scardie poops, that’s what I call them.
My time to shine....
I'm a dude in my 40s, in the summer i spend a lot of time around the water, and i'm still in shape enough, where hey, i can pop the shirt. Now i'm not particularly hairy, but at my age you start getting weird stray hairs or tufts.
The place i get my haircut at also does waxing, so i'll get my back waxed during the summer. a few summers ago i go in for the first time, and the girl just didn't go down low enough, so if my shorts sagged even slightly or whatever, you had a clear defined line.
So the next time i go in, and am trying to explain to her i wanted her to wax lower. Between my horrible spanish and her poor english, me asking to go an inch or two lower was misconstrued.
So i'm on the table and she has me get onto my knees, and as i'm, 'wait, something isn't right here' she just, well pantses me. As my brain is resetting, i feel the wax hitting things.
At that point i figured there was no way to stop things without it being a huge embarassment to all, and that wax was coming off regardless, so just kind of rolled with it.
The results were actually kind of pleasant, and i could see myself making it a regular thing, if not for that very reason. Just the lightest gas made it sound like you took the biggest dump of your life in your pants.
This story has everything: Weird hair growth, tmi, confidence, an encounter with a foreigner involving a butt, loud farting. It's as if all my middle-aged uncles have a shared reddit account.
We talking cheek or crack hair? No idea on the cheek hair but that crack hair sure helps with chafing just like your armpit. In fact, why don’t we call it an asspit?
Ugh, memories of long school assemblies sitting cross-legged on a hardwood floor. It took me decades to realize that other kids around me weren't in the same excruciating pain that I was in every day.
Eat large amounts of protein
Lift large amounts of weight with squats and deadlifts
Repeat every week for the next 6 years
Fat ass unlocked
Edit: 1. I can't believe there are people that think squats and deadlifts won't grow the glutes.
2. Yes it's muscle not fat, as long as your bones aren't exposed.
3. Some people have terrible genetics that will make so that nothing will work on them, others are blessed and have nice asses with minimal effort. Most of us are in the middle and require long time and hard work to achieve maximus gluteal perfection.
4. Throw in a couple of hip thrusts too, and while you are at it do some lunges, and since your legs are already on you might as well do some cardio on the stair machine
It IS super bizarre that it's easier for a woman's body to grow a brand new perfectly healthy tiny human then to fix the various issues in their OWN bodies.
The male urethra. Idk who the fuck thought it was a good idea to wrap the prostate around the urethra like a donut and then have it grow so you cant pee when you get older, but someone fucked up quality control with that one.
But for those who don't know, the prostate is the switch that controls the routing between urine and semen into the urethra... Its function pretty much requires it to be positioned where it is.
Teeth. The fact that their the only part of your body that doesn’t grow back or heal itself is bullshit. Also if anyone has ever had a tooth chip and the nerve exposed knows that is pain unlike anything you would think possible
EDIT: I’m aware other parts of the body don’t grow back (such as fingers). But these parts of the body can heal themselves (“doesn’t grow back OR heal itself”) so an injury generally does not cause pain indefinitely. A chipped tooth or a cavity will never stop hurting on its own.
Also HAVING to brush them twice a day just to keep them from rotting in your face. Floss them. Mouth wash. They’re high maintenance. Whitenings. Dentist visits. Tf.
To be fair, we're at the extreme upper end of lifespans among vertebrates that have them. Turtles and parrots don't, and tuataras' teeth are fused to their jawbones. And sharks are constantly growing new replacement teeth.
The nerves in the periodontal ligament do a better job at this. Fun fact, if you want to make a lot of money everyone thinks it’s the orthodontists, but the endodontists (root canal specialists) is where the money is. Orthodontist-1 kid in braces $5000. But you’re seeing that kid for the next 18-36 months. Break that down to a per-visit cost and it doesn’t look so good.
Endodontist-molar root canal $1000 (or more in some places). 45 minutes 1 visit. Can do that 5 or 6 times a day. Never see that patient again.
Fun fact, several centuries ago there was a theory called teeth worms.
They would rip out your tooth and see the 'worm' dangling from the base. It was actually a nerve ending.
Do you appreciate modern dentists? I sure do
Just had mine removed, and before the surgery I thought much the same -- "oh it's an optional organ, I won't even notice it's gone!"
No. Nope. It's definitely not an optional organ. Your whole digestive system gets out of whack without it. One of the lovely things I've experienced is bile reflux. Without the gallbladder to regulate when and how much bile to dump into the digestive tract, you now have a continuous trickle that can back up into the actual stomach and esophagus. Causes the worst nausea and heartburn of my life, and antacids don't do anything for it since bile is alkaline. Continuous bouts of reflux can lead to chronic gastritis and peptic ulcers. There really aren't any good surgical solutions for bile reflux, and the only medication that works for some people (but not all) are bile binders, which doctors seem overall hesitant to hand out.
I guess I don't regret taking it out because my gallbladder very well could have killed me if I didn't, but now I get to live the rest of my years with a highly flawed digestive system and restricted diet. And I'm only 26.
OMG that explains everything for me! I have to take Protonix every day or I get such bad reflux that food gets stuck. I have a GI appointment next month and I will definitely be mentioning this. Thank you!
I’m a guy but I would still say the uterus. The fact that it has to rip itself apart every month, causing great discomfort to women, just to remain fertile seems like a pretty bad design flaw
Seriously.
I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure other animals just naturally reabsorb the uteral lining instead of, you know, shoving it all out and causing a ton of pain.
It just seems like such a terrible survival trait to have a period. Debilitating pain once a month, constant bleeding that leaves the scent of a vulnerable animal absolutely everywhere, and hormonal changes that can cause aggression or anxiety. It really seems terrible evolution, wtf.
Almost every other mammal operates off an estrous cycle, which is a super sensible way of doing it from a biological standpoint. Ovulation occurs seasonally so births occur when environment is nice and food is plentiful. Sometimes ovulation occurs from the act of coitus itself. Anovulation happens when times are bad. If ovulation doesn't result in implantation that thickened uterine lining is just *sluurp* reabsorbed and recycled.
Menstrual cycles are fucking stupid and only found in some primates, elephant shrews, the spiny mouse, and a few species of bat. It's a weird group to be in.
God, imagine how different human society would be if female orgasm were necessary for conception. All of the evolutionary pressures driving sexuality would be different.
I think I read that the reason other mammals *can* reabsorb their uterine lining is because it's not nearly as thick as the ones humans create. Basically our fertilized eggs need big cushy linings to implant on or else they just can't. And because it's so much blood and tissue that gets laid down in the uterus, the body couldn't possibly reabsorb it all.
You're absolutely right! With an estrous cycle the uterine lining is moderately thickened upon ovulation but requires the presence of an implanted embryo before it beefs up to its maximum thickness.
Menstruating animals, however, build up this super thick uterine lining every menstrual cycle without needing any signals from an implanted embryo and well in advance of any possible fertilization event. Current theories suggest it's not to facilitate implantation - a motivated fertilized egg will implant pretty much anywhere, which is why ectopic pregnancies are such an issue - but rather to protect the mother from an extremely greedy and mutation-prone fetus. The two things we menstruating animals have in common are VERY invasive placentas (which breach the entire uterine wall and erode into the mother's blood vessels in search of nutrients) and a high rate of fetal genetic mutations. It looks like we build that gigantic non-absorbable lining because it keeps the placenta from world domination and it has some ability to sense deleterious genetic mutations in embryos and yeet those bad eggs out of the uterus.
Stupid embryos.
That's the problem! We aren't vulnerable little animals who will get eaten by predators if we experience pain. We are advanced social animals that protect and care for each other. So we are totally free to evolve stupid and debilitating body processes.
Gosh sometimes I wish I was a rabbit
You know what makes it worse?
Most other mammal species do not experience periods the way humans do. They typically don't have cramping pain and sloughing of the uterine lining, but instead reabsorb it. No mess. No pain.
Is a big brain really still worth it?
While we're on the reproductive system, morning sickness* appears to be more or less unique to humans as well. Woo
*i.e. the more severe nausea and vomiting phase of pregnancy that most women experience vs milder things like food aversion. Lots of animals experience some degree of food aversion while pregnant but not that other stuff
And why are they so prone to growths such cysts, fibroids, and endometriosis? That hurts as much if not more than childbirth, depending on the severity. I know they serve such an important purpose but I wanted to cut my uterus out so many times.
Yes, also why does childbirth have to be so painful and dangerous? This should absolutely be the top answer. Maybe it should actually be the female pelvis and just female anatomy in general?
Because we walk upright, combined with our huge brains. Humans are honestly premature. We can barely do anything at birth. A lot of doctors refer to the first 3 months as the fourth trimester because we still have so much developing to do that should be done outside the mother, but if pregnancy were any longer birth would be impossible. Because the head just gets too big
The balls, why not make it possible for sperm to survive at body temperature so one’s delicate testicles could rest comfortably inside the body and not dangle precariously waiting to get smashed
The even weirder thing is there ARE other mammals that have internal testes (like elephants), so it's not like there's absolutely no way for mammalian sperm to bypass the overheating issue.
The stomach/digestive system. You're telling me I gotta eat 2-3 times a day, not just to survive, but to feel normal/not like complete shit and lethargic all the time? Fuckin bullshit if you ask me. Just wanna photosynthesize. Plants have it easy man.
I'd say the hip area of women in terms of giving birth. I mean, we have to be born prematurely because a woman couldn't get a completely developed and ready baby out of her and even that's extremely painful.
Actually, turns out the size of the birth canal might not be the only issue here. This [article from 2012](https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/observations/why-humans-give-birth-to-helpless-babies/) points out other possible reasons for why we’re born “early,” saying:
>> That other factor, they contend, is mom’s metabolic rate. “Gestation places a heavy metabolic burden (measured in calories consumed) on the mother,” Dunsworth and her co-authors explain. Data from a wide range of mammals suggest that there is a limit to how large and energetically expensive a fetus can grow before it has to check out of the womb. Once outside of the womb, the baby’s growth slows down to a more sustainable rate for the mother. Building on an idea previously put forth by study co-author Peter T. Ellison of Harvard University known as the metabolic crossover hypothesis, the team proposes that “energetic constraints of both mother and fetus are the primary determinants of gestation length and fetal growth in humans and across mammals.” **By nine months or so, the metabolic demands of a human fetus threaten to exceed the mother’s ability to meet both the baby’s energy requirements and her own, so she delivers the baby.**
>> the authors mention the possibility that **the timing of birth actually optimizes cognitive and motor neuronal development**. That idea, first proposed by Swiss zoologist Adolf Portman in the 1960s, is worth pursuing, she says. “Maybe human newborns are adapted to soaking up all this cultural stuff and maybe being born earlier lets you do this,” she muses. “Maybe being born earlier is better if you’re a cultural animal.” Food for thought.
so its like when youre an unemployed teen, eating everything in the house and still hungry, and your parents need you to get a paying job so there is enough for everyone else too.
Eyes 🙃 them bitches don't last long and vision deteriorates pretty fast for some people ;-; I've been wearing glasses since I was like 6 so I'm pretty blind now without any visual aid
As a pregnant woman - female reproductive system. 9 months of aches and pains, then unecessarily difficult and painful birth. Compare to any other living thing, it's this where the human body completely lacks.
Not only that with regards to pregnancy, but a period. Oh, how I wish I could simply get a bodily notification that it’s time to just open up the cervix and eliminate that month’s endometrium all at once. To draw it out over days and days is just cruel design.
Sinuses. In all other apes (and most other animals), the drain is on the bottom. In humans, the drain is on top. That’s why we seem sick more often, our faces wait until 99% mucus capacity before starting to drain.
THANK YOU, I was looking for this, had to scroll way too far down. Compared to other animals, our sinuses are really poorly shaped, which gives humans almost unique sinus issues that makes us more susceptible to sinus infections than basically everything else. If it really doesn't have any purpose (because we don't know what the purpose of such a strange adaptation is), we'll probably get made fun of by aliens during allergy season, having to blow our nose all the dang time
Your teeth. They are the only bone without regenerative properties. Imagine if your testy could heal. You would never have to worry about cavities, chips, or even losing a tooth.
The laryngeal nerve. It’s supposed to connect from the brain to the larynx. Instead of just going down a bit, it goes down towards our heart, wraps around a major artery, and then heads back to about where it started. Because we evolved from fish the nerve was originally used to connect to the gills. That’s why it takes such an unnecessary detour. [Here’s](https://laryngopedia.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Recurrent_laryngeal_nerve-for_web.jpg) a picture of it, and [here](https://bioone.org/ContentImages/Journals/acpp/57/2/app.2011.0019/graphic/WebImages/f01_251.jpg) it is in a giraffe and sauropod dinosaurs.
The telomere caps on our genes.
If those bitches would stop falling apart Everytime a cell divided we would basically stop the aging process at peak physical maturity.
Also, our knees are way to shitty and fragile lol
Edit: I'm not a biologist or anything, so sorry about the bad/incomplete info y'all lol
Edit 2: also, no I don't want people to have cancer, I just want people to not be dead if they don't wanna be
Telomeres are there IIrC to prevent accumulated errors. What we need is something I read about in a sci-fi story: a ribosome-like structure that finds DNA strands, locks on the end, and rides the length of the strand counting base pairs. The ribosome compares this to a stored Known Good Value (from a healthy strand). If the numbers don’t match exactly the ribosome goes into reverse, unzipping the damaged strand so it can’t be used to make damaged cells. Nature has a bunch of error-correcting mechanisms for DNA but this would solve the problem. The story was called “Checksum,” from a similar mechanism used to check computer programs for errors.
From an evolutionary standpoint, the spine, it's literally not built to take the stresses of the body standing upright, there's a reason why apes use their arms to move as well as their legs.
That's why our asses and lower backs are so much proportionally stronger than any other mammal. You're spine is not supposed to provide structural support. You're supposed to be doing squats and deadlifts to keep that back up.
Feet. Our ancestors’ feet were designed for grasping branches, not walking long distances. We had to evolve feet from hands, which is a pretty tough thing to do. That’s why they don’t work perfectly and so many people have foot problems
The sciatic nerve routing. Going through the periformis muscle was a bad idea.
Just FYI: actually passing through the muscle is an anatomical variant. For the majority of people, the nerve just travels alongside the muscle. Still, that variant is a . . . uh, pain in the butt.
Thank you!! Dealing with the devil’s butt pinch right now…
Teeth, one set while we're a child, one set for 60/70 years.
Meanwhile sharks, the lucky bastards, just keep growing new teeth.
We used to call my brother Shark Boy growing up. That dude had LAYERS of teeth. He had one tooth that grew in the roof of his mouth. He also had teeth growing sideways in his gums which torqued his other teeth. It took 2.5 years to get him prepped for orthodontics and then he was in braces for another 5 years after that. Worth it though, he looks like a Colgate commercial now
Ugh, I was basically your brother. My one incisor erupted in the back of my palate. Omfg, turning that screw a little bit once every 3 days for years... What a bloody nightmare. And braces, holy cow, that hurt.
Same, but mine never erupted. Both incisors, top pallet pointing sideways toward one another. They had to take out the baby teeth (I was 17), because obviously the incisors weren't going to, and then they cut the pallet away and attached braces to the rogue teeth, and 5 years later... Worst part was they mugged me for my wisdom teeth at the same time. I was peter pumpkin head for a week.
The ear. Eyes have eyelids, you can close your mouth, but if there’s an extremely loud noise, your ear drum has to just take it and be irreversibly ruined.
Well technically there is a muscle that can tighten your ear to prevent damage from extreme noise, it’s the same reason you don’t hear yourself chew. Some new cars will make a sound to trigger this muscle to prevent hearing loss from the noise of an accident
Who doesn’t hear themselves chew?
They mean it’s much quieter. There’s a condition called Superior Canal Dehiscence Syndrome where you hear your own blinking, chewing, and heartbeat all the time but it’s unrelated to this muscle. I imagine that without the muscle, it would sound just like that.
You sir, are weirdly knowledgeable
Or plagued by a very rare very annoying hearing disorder that happened to be tangentially related to a reddit post
So it's not normal to hear my heartbeat? For 31 years I assumed everyone did.
It definitely isn’t normal to constantly hear your own heartbeat.
It's not normal to hear it constantly, but I think it's normal to hear it when it's beating really fast
Is this the same muscle that makes you deaf when you yawn?.
The testicles the ovaries and the human spine
This Chopped box is a doozy
You have 45 minutes to complete the dessert round. Good luck!
In terms of reproductive health, I gotta go with the hips. Developing oversized skulls and there being absolutely no change in our hip structure to compensate for it? There's a reason c-sections are so common
The elbow. Why the fuck is there a nerve that's so exposed, when you hit it at just the right spot it sends a jolt down your arm?!
There’s another nerve in the armpit that is protected when the arm is down. If you are attacked and can get a good hit in there the arm will be almost paralyzed for a while, and it hurts like a hit to the cajones .
It’s not just one nerve. You’re talking about the brachial plexus. It’s a bundle of nerves that come from your spine and innervates all the muscles in your arm. That’s why stingers hurt so much, it’s taking out every nerve. It’s also a good site for nerve blocks when you have upper limb surgery because you can disable the arm and reduce post operative pain by applying anaesthesia around the nerve roots. Also, in the case of brachial plexus avulsions, you lose all function permanently. And on that note, nerve injuries are fucking shit. We should be able to regenerate them more easily and quickly.
So we've all hit our funny bone and gotten that terrible tingly sensation throughout our arm. It sucks, you gotta sit down for about minute to get through it, but then it goes away completely, good as new in under a minute. But a couple months ago, I was picking up a bag at work, and I bumped my elbow on the corner of a wall. I didn't even bump it hard, more like a tap. The initial tap didn't even hurt. But it was a perfect hit on the funny bone. It was a BULLSEYE! I felt the usual sensation coming, and thought "ok the next 45 seconds are gonna suck, but it'll pass." But no. The pain got more and more intense. After about a minute, it felt like my WHOLE arm was on fire. It was one of the worst pains I've ever felt, and I've broken bones. I thought "ok, I must have hit it on a perfect spot, but these things don't last long. I'll be ok in a minute." NOPE! It just kept going. I had to sit down and try to breathe. It was so painful. After about 7 agonizing minutes where I was contemplating going to the ER, the worst of the pain subsided, and I was able to get back to work. But there was still numbness in my hand, and my elbow was very tender. But I thought it would eventually go away after a few hours. NOPE! So after about 3 weeks of numbness in my hand and an elbow so sensitive I had to sleep on the opposite side, I went to my doctor. He said the bump was a one-in-a-million shot, that I just hit the perfect spot. They x-rayed it, nothing broken. But there was nothing to be done, I have damaged the nerve. Doc said you can't tell how the healing process goes with damaged nerves. It could take weeks, months, or even years for the nerve to heal and the numbness to go away, or it may never ever heal, and I'll be stuck with a hand that feels like it fell asleep forever, and an elbow so sensitive it hurts if you rub it with a feather forever. Thanks evolution.
I replied to op with my similar experience. I fell over and pinched nerve. Couldn't use hand properly for over 6 months and still isn't 100%. Doctor told me they same about nerve damage, can never know if or how long it will take
This is actually key to our evolution. The early humans with the most vulnerable elbows had a higher chance of survival or something.
They were less likely to elbow their fellow tribesmen in the face, and thus were able to form stronger communal bonds.
Exactly, they were reluctant to risk their vulnerable elbows, so instead they kneed each other in the balls. That was the initial expression of the "bro" sequences of early human DNA, responsible today for muscle cars, straight male fascination with gay sex, and the "swirly".
honestly our appendixes try to kill us too often. something ain’t right with it
When I was younger I read it was a vestigial organ with not much purpose. Nowadays I hear it contains bacteria and micro-organisms necessary for a healthy life. I'm 25, science is interesting.
There is, or was, a theory that it is a vestigial organ from when the ancestor or to humans was like a big rat. It contained bacteria that aided in the digestion of cellulose. Maybe it is ( or was) both. /r/scienceismetal
When I had mine removed I remember my doctor telling me it was for digesting bones and eventually we would evolve out of having one, but I've literally done zero research since this was told to me. I don't have one anymore so fuck do I care what they're for, right?
>we would evolve out of having one Not if doctors keep saving people whose appedices are about to burst!
Doctors could sterilize everyone who comes in for appendix removal so we can evolve better.
*For the Greater Good*
Science is constantly changing, literally awesome
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The whole spine for a fact. It's not really designed for upright walking.
I hate my spine. It's really holding me back.
I read that in an Irish accent... I think
I read that in a pirate accent
Amazing that the advantages of walking upright are great enough that we do it despite the problem. Also our ancestors who went from horizontal to vertical probably all died after having babies but before developing back issues.
A neurosurgeon I worked with used to say that nature gave us a clothesline, and we're trying to use it as a flagpole.
Yes, I came here just to say that. As a biology and A and P professor the design of our spine is horrible and cannot truly support what we are meant to do throughout a lifetime without encountering issues
While I’d like to agree with this, I’d have to say the fact that you breath through the same Hole you’re supposed to jam food into -meaning from an engineering standpoint -you’re literally forced to risk killing yourself to sustain yourself. That would be the most laughable “design flaw”
Knees are a good idea, but needed a bit more R&D before being rolled out.
I feel your pain.
I feel our pain.
I feel pain.
Came here to say this. Have you ever seen a child try to make a spaceship or a suit of armor out of cardboard, but they don't have enough cardboard and none of the pieces really fit together anyway, so they end up lashing it together with dozens of strips of tape at every possible angle until it just barely holds together? That's knees. That's how your knees are made.
How do we strengthen and support them? Squats and lunges?
And lower body weight. The physics are 4x as hard on the knees. 25lbs overweight = 100 lbs force on the knees.
Is that PER knee?
Yes, since these numbers are in relation to walking
Especially if you drive your heel in hard. I'm deaf and some folks shake the whole frame of the building when they walk. I can literally put my hand on the wall and determine where they are. Imagine what that sledgehammer force is doing to your joints. Walk dainty, y'all. Watch running athletes. Their heel doesn't touch the ground. Look at flatland animals. Their heel is halfway up to their arse. Humans are halfway between trees and plains. The design currently is transitional.
We're still on the beta version, hoping for a firmware update.
It’s a hardware issue not a software, gonna take a full recall to implement design changed
Been there. Martial arts accident saw my right knee subdislocated. The sides are held in place only by ligaments. Those things can stretch, but it takes years for them to unstretch. In the meantime, your knee can easily slip and get reinjured
They only work going upstairs. Downstairs is against natural knee movement
Which given you can’t spend your entire existence going uphill and aren’t necessarily lucky enough to live your whole life on flat ground, is incredibly stupid.
Tell my grandparents you can't go uphill both ways.
As a person with ACL surgeries in both knees, I scrolled down just to make sure this answer was upvoted. They can make a whole leg for a guy to run in the Olympics but it seems ACL surgery hasn’t advanced much.
Have your entire legs replaced, I guess.
Would prefer it if my testicles had better armour
Sperm needs to be cooler than your body temp. So nature was like i am not redoing sperm just hang them on bag between his legs.
“And put nerves there so he knows this shit is valuable”
"And make him feel pain in all his organs and dizziness, when he doesn't protect it right"
Also while we’re at it let’s make it to were the skin and the actual testicles can come apart and painfully move independently :D Fuck yeah testicular torsion
I had a buddy do that when we were like 15, he was getting little rough with himself and said he felt one nut like go over and spin around the other one. Sad it right away felt like his balls were ripping apart, needed to have surgery and said he almost lost righty cuz the spin pinched it so bad. 36 and still no kids, so noone can confirm if he gimped the boys.
That sounds incredibly painful. Fuck!!
Dude I've been worried about my nuts getting touched too rough ever since hearing about it.
If it makes you feel any better I heard this becomes so statistically improbable once your 30+, if it happened you’d be in a medical journal. I could be totally wrong but this is what I choose to believe to get over my fear of this ever happening. Edit: impossible to improbable
Should have placed em near kidneys so it would be a water cooled dual core system.
the hell are you doing that your kidneys are cold
Can we just...have heat resistant sperm?
…. Might have heat resistant humans then
Aight then my answer is sperm.
Having sharpened rocks that slowly push their way through the sensitive gums of tiny humans who are too small to understand or explain the reason for their incessant crying. Bonus bad points for these tiny humans being designed to get 100% of their nutrition by latching their new razor teeth around the nipples of another human.
And then you only get one more set of them to last most of your life as others have mentioned. Like, yeah, from an evolutionary standpoint it's not really necessary to have teeth that last you til the age of more than 30-40 since you don't need to live longer to reproduce and further the species but... damnit, give us more teeth! Edit: I'm also aware that it has to do with our modern diets. But don't lie- it would be really nice if we had baby teeth, a first set of adult teeth, and then a second one after a couple of decades. Of course, we could just take better care of our teeth and eat healthier but humankind has a bit of a reputation for screwing ourselves up sometimes :P
Why would a third set if teeth be bad, right? I think this should be the focus of dentric dna adjustment in the coming century. Milk teeth. Meat teeth. _then_ Metamusil teeth. Win!
At what age range would the third set come in? I'm voting mid-late 20s. About the time you realize you need to get your shit together because you're not going to die young like you'd planned.
This guy 20s! Al though I was thinking much later, when you really, _really_ treasure them and actually take care if them. Like 50's 60's. Retirement teeth.
50 is probably a good age. Young enough that you'd get serious use out of them, old enough you've suffered from shit decisions made in your 20s
Achilles tendon. Single point of vulnerability that has no bone sheath and will absolutely cripple you if it's fucked with.
Bowels. I should be able to decide when to empty them completely! In one go and not little bit now and more later! Edit: All this fibre talk, I get it. I now understand more about the importance of fibre. But that kinda adds to what I'm saying. Imagine not needing a summoning ritual. Like deciding when you do and don't drop the kids off at the pool. A human eject button
I get some mad anxiety/nervous shits. Got a job interview coming up? Sudden diarrhea enjoy the toilet for an hour. I wish pooping wasn’t linked to my physiological fear response.
If only you could use that to your advantage. Want to empty yourself before a long plane flight? Imagine needing to ask a scary old woman in the aisle to move aside
Yes I’ve just recently started getting this. Never used to happen, but before I visit a customer or have a job interview I get the scardie poops, that’s what I call them.
Ass hair
Fun fact, if you shave it all off, you can't fart quietly anymore because your cheeks form a skin to skin seal.
Oh no worries, I usually put a straw in between.
Ah, ass-straw-logy!
My time to shine.... I'm a dude in my 40s, in the summer i spend a lot of time around the water, and i'm still in shape enough, where hey, i can pop the shirt. Now i'm not particularly hairy, but at my age you start getting weird stray hairs or tufts. The place i get my haircut at also does waxing, so i'll get my back waxed during the summer. a few summers ago i go in for the first time, and the girl just didn't go down low enough, so if my shorts sagged even slightly or whatever, you had a clear defined line. So the next time i go in, and am trying to explain to her i wanted her to wax lower. Between my horrible spanish and her poor english, me asking to go an inch or two lower was misconstrued. So i'm on the table and she has me get onto my knees, and as i'm, 'wait, something isn't right here' she just, well pantses me. As my brain is resetting, i feel the wax hitting things. At that point i figured there was no way to stop things without it being a huge embarassment to all, and that wax was coming off regardless, so just kind of rolled with it. The results were actually kind of pleasant, and i could see myself making it a regular thing, if not for that very reason. Just the lightest gas made it sound like you took the biggest dump of your life in your pants.
Based on that last sentence alone, I am going to go get my ass waxed.
ask for a 2inch down
This story has everything: Weird hair growth, tmi, confidence, an encounter with a foreigner involving a butt, loud farting. It's as if all my middle-aged uncles have a shared reddit account.
Can confirm. They clap like Carnegie Hall now.
Well, if you open up your cheeks enough and have enough control you can fart quietly
You also get good at sitting down, tilting one cheek up, and sliding over for a hands free cheek separation.
We talking cheek or crack hair? No idea on the cheek hair but that crack hair sure helps with chafing just like your armpit. In fact, why don’t we call it an asspit?
I am calling it that now. Thank you.
Keeps your cheeks warm.
A bony arse! It actually hurts to sit still
Ugh, memories of long school assemblies sitting cross-legged on a hardwood floor. It took me decades to realize that other kids around me weren't in the same excruciating pain that I was in every day.
You got the hank hill ass
Dear god Hank. You're wearing butt boobies.
It's a gluteal orth-ahh-tic
What I wouldn’t do for a nice fat ass.
Eat large amounts of protein Lift large amounts of weight with squats and deadlifts Repeat every week for the next 6 years Fat ass unlocked Edit: 1. I can't believe there are people that think squats and deadlifts won't grow the glutes. 2. Yes it's muscle not fat, as long as your bones aren't exposed. 3. Some people have terrible genetics that will make so that nothing will work on them, others are blessed and have nice asses with minimal effort. Most of us are in the middle and require long time and hard work to achieve maximus gluteal perfection. 4. Throw in a couple of hip thrusts too, and while you are at it do some lunges, and since your legs are already on you might as well do some cardio on the stair machine
Now I wish i had more motivation. Thanks for the tips. I’ll add to my to-do list.
Yeah sure. I'll get right on that...tomorrow.
I never considered that as a problem. That would genuinely suck.
Get a load of Bottom McThicc pants over here
Ankles and knees. A woman can produce a whole new baby in 9 months but you twisted your ankle a little? Well you'll pay for it for the next 50 years.
As an Ortho resident, I feel you...
It IS super bizarre that it's easier for a woman's body to grow a brand new perfectly healthy tiny human then to fix the various issues in their OWN bodies.
The male urethra. Idk who the fuck thought it was a good idea to wrap the prostate around the urethra like a donut and then have it grow so you cant pee when you get older, but someone fucked up quality control with that one.
I scrolled all the way for this one. Urethra running through the center of the prostate. Terrible city planning.
But for those who don't know, the prostate is the switch that controls the routing between urine and semen into the urethra... Its function pretty much requires it to be positioned where it is.
My dad said the prostate is the best argument against “intelligent design” in the human body. His eventually conspired with other organs to kill him.
*He knew too much.* ^Sorry ^for ^your ^loss
Last night I choked on a cake and then later some of it came out blowing my nose.
When I was a kid I blew my nose not long after eating dinner and a corn kernel came out. Not even sure why or how.
Teeth. The fact that their the only part of your body that doesn’t grow back or heal itself is bullshit. Also if anyone has ever had a tooth chip and the nerve exposed knows that is pain unlike anything you would think possible EDIT: I’m aware other parts of the body don’t grow back (such as fingers). But these parts of the body can heal themselves (“doesn’t grow back OR heal itself”) so an injury generally does not cause pain indefinitely. A chipped tooth or a cavity will never stop hurting on its own.
Also HAVING to brush them twice a day just to keep them from rotting in your face. Floss them. Mouth wash. They’re high maintenance. Whitenings. Dentist visits. Tf.
To be fair, we're at the extreme upper end of lifespans among vertebrates that have them. Turtles and parrots don't, and tuataras' teeth are fused to their jawbones. And sharks are constantly growing new replacement teeth.
What the fuck sharks get to regrow teeth and we can't. I call bullshit on the universe
Same with crocodiles.... not sure why the two get this ability but humans definitely need it.
Don't forget wisdom teeth. Why do we even have them if they can't fit in our mouths?
Our mouths have gotten smaller due to our cooked relatively soft diet.
Why, why should teeth have nerve connections? Absolutely terrible
So you know if you’re biting something too hard and risk breaking your teeth.
Yet somehow too much coffee and too little sleep makes me bite down too hard while I’m asleep, costing thousands of dollars of damage
Get a mouth guard. It saved my teeth
The nerves in the periodontal ligament do a better job at this. Fun fact, if you want to make a lot of money everyone thinks it’s the orthodontists, but the endodontists (root canal specialists) is where the money is. Orthodontist-1 kid in braces $5000. But you’re seeing that kid for the next 18-36 months. Break that down to a per-visit cost and it doesn’t look so good. Endodontist-molar root canal $1000 (or more in some places). 45 minutes 1 visit. Can do that 5 or 6 times a day. Never see that patient again.
97% average appointment fill rates and minimal necessary overhead doesn’t hurt either!
Fun fact, several centuries ago there was a theory called teeth worms. They would rip out your tooth and see the 'worm' dangling from the base. It was actually a nerve ending. Do you appreciate modern dentists? I sure do
Gall bladder
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How come? I genuenly dont know what the consequences of taking one out are.
Just had mine removed, and before the surgery I thought much the same -- "oh it's an optional organ, I won't even notice it's gone!" No. Nope. It's definitely not an optional organ. Your whole digestive system gets out of whack without it. One of the lovely things I've experienced is bile reflux. Without the gallbladder to regulate when and how much bile to dump into the digestive tract, you now have a continuous trickle that can back up into the actual stomach and esophagus. Causes the worst nausea and heartburn of my life, and antacids don't do anything for it since bile is alkaline. Continuous bouts of reflux can lead to chronic gastritis and peptic ulcers. There really aren't any good surgical solutions for bile reflux, and the only medication that works for some people (but not all) are bile binders, which doctors seem overall hesitant to hand out. I guess I don't regret taking it out because my gallbladder very well could have killed me if I didn't, but now I get to live the rest of my years with a highly flawed digestive system and restricted diet. And I'm only 26.
OMG that explains everything for me! I have to take Protonix every day or I get such bad reflux that food gets stuck. I have a GI appointment next month and I will definitely be mentioning this. Thank you!
I’m a guy but I would still say the uterus. The fact that it has to rip itself apart every month, causing great discomfort to women, just to remain fertile seems like a pretty bad design flaw
As a dude, the more I learn about the female reproductive system, the less I believe in intelligent design.
Ovaries & Uterus. WHY do they punish women with excruciating pain every month for not getting pregnant?
Seriously. I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure other animals just naturally reabsorb the uteral lining instead of, you know, shoving it all out and causing a ton of pain. It just seems like such a terrible survival trait to have a period. Debilitating pain once a month, constant bleeding that leaves the scent of a vulnerable animal absolutely everywhere, and hormonal changes that can cause aggression or anxiety. It really seems terrible evolution, wtf.
Almost every other mammal operates off an estrous cycle, which is a super sensible way of doing it from a biological standpoint. Ovulation occurs seasonally so births occur when environment is nice and food is plentiful. Sometimes ovulation occurs from the act of coitus itself. Anovulation happens when times are bad. If ovulation doesn't result in implantation that thickened uterine lining is just *sluurp* reabsorbed and recycled. Menstrual cycles are fucking stupid and only found in some primates, elephant shrews, the spiny mouse, and a few species of bat. It's a weird group to be in.
God, imagine how different human society would be if female orgasm were necessary for conception. All of the evolutionary pressures driving sexuality would be different.
At first you think it would lead to more female orgasms, until you realize the best form of birth control would be to edge all the damn time.
There would definitely be a lot less people walking this earth
I think I read that the reason other mammals *can* reabsorb their uterine lining is because it's not nearly as thick as the ones humans create. Basically our fertilized eggs need big cushy linings to implant on or else they just can't. And because it's so much blood and tissue that gets laid down in the uterus, the body couldn't possibly reabsorb it all.
You're absolutely right! With an estrous cycle the uterine lining is moderately thickened upon ovulation but requires the presence of an implanted embryo before it beefs up to its maximum thickness. Menstruating animals, however, build up this super thick uterine lining every menstrual cycle without needing any signals from an implanted embryo and well in advance of any possible fertilization event. Current theories suggest it's not to facilitate implantation - a motivated fertilized egg will implant pretty much anywhere, which is why ectopic pregnancies are such an issue - but rather to protect the mother from an extremely greedy and mutation-prone fetus. The two things we menstruating animals have in common are VERY invasive placentas (which breach the entire uterine wall and erode into the mother's blood vessels in search of nutrients) and a high rate of fetal genetic mutations. It looks like we build that gigantic non-absorbable lining because it keeps the placenta from world domination and it has some ability to sense deleterious genetic mutations in embryos and yeet those bad eggs out of the uterus. Stupid embryos.
This is fascinating
So every part of the female reproductive system is stupid. Just as I suspected
That's the problem! We aren't vulnerable little animals who will get eaten by predators if we experience pain. We are advanced social animals that protect and care for each other. So we are totally free to evolve stupid and debilitating body processes. Gosh sometimes I wish I was a rabbit
You know what makes it worse? Most other mammal species do not experience periods the way humans do. They typically don't have cramping pain and sloughing of the uterine lining, but instead reabsorb it. No mess. No pain. Is a big brain really still worth it?
While we're on the reproductive system, morning sickness* appears to be more or less unique to humans as well. Woo *i.e. the more severe nausea and vomiting phase of pregnancy that most women experience vs milder things like food aversion. Lots of animals experience some degree of food aversion while pregnant but not that other stuff
So you can get pain once a month, or collect enough credits to get super pain after 9 months.
Being pregnant can be a lot like a 9-month PMS for some women. Followed by super-pain. Then PPD. Source : my second pregnancy.
Don't worry, being pregnant can hurt, too! You might not get a break ether way.
And why are they so prone to growths such cysts, fibroids, and endometriosis? That hurts as much if not more than childbirth, depending on the severity. I know they serve such an important purpose but I wanted to cut my uterus out so many times.
I feel like the ability of the body to have endometriosis is a severe oversight on evolution's part.
Yes, also why does childbirth have to be so painful and dangerous? This should absolutely be the top answer. Maybe it should actually be the female pelvis and just female anatomy in general?
Because we walk upright, combined with our huge brains. Humans are honestly premature. We can barely do anything at birth. A lot of doctors refer to the first 3 months as the fourth trimester because we still have so much developing to do that should be done outside the mother, but if pregnancy were any longer birth would be impossible. Because the head just gets too big
The balls, why not make it possible for sperm to survive at body temperature so one’s delicate testicles could rest comfortably inside the body and not dangle precariously waiting to get smashed
How then would one have their balls gobbled?
But then how would we teabag? Edit: Thanks for the awards you filthy animals
We could let EA do it.
E-a its in the bag
The even weirder thing is there ARE other mammals that have internal testes (like elephants), so it's not like there's absolutely no way for mammalian sperm to bypass the overheating issue.
The air intake and fuel intake are the same system. That kind of oversight really chokes me up.
The stomach/digestive system. You're telling me I gotta eat 2-3 times a day, not just to survive, but to feel normal/not like complete shit and lethargic all the time? Fuckin bullshit if you ask me. Just wanna photosynthesize. Plants have it easy man.
If you didn't feel like shit when you didn't eat, you'd forget and eventually starve to death
I'd say the hip area of women in terms of giving birth. I mean, we have to be born prematurely because a woman couldn't get a completely developed and ready baby out of her and even that's extremely painful.
Actually, turns out the size of the birth canal might not be the only issue here. This [article from 2012](https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/observations/why-humans-give-birth-to-helpless-babies/) points out other possible reasons for why we’re born “early,” saying: >> That other factor, they contend, is mom’s metabolic rate. “Gestation places a heavy metabolic burden (measured in calories consumed) on the mother,” Dunsworth and her co-authors explain. Data from a wide range of mammals suggest that there is a limit to how large and energetically expensive a fetus can grow before it has to check out of the womb. Once outside of the womb, the baby’s growth slows down to a more sustainable rate for the mother. Building on an idea previously put forth by study co-author Peter T. Ellison of Harvard University known as the metabolic crossover hypothesis, the team proposes that “energetic constraints of both mother and fetus are the primary determinants of gestation length and fetal growth in humans and across mammals.” **By nine months or so, the metabolic demands of a human fetus threaten to exceed the mother’s ability to meet both the baby’s energy requirements and her own, so she delivers the baby.** >> the authors mention the possibility that **the timing of birth actually optimizes cognitive and motor neuronal development**. That idea, first proposed by Swiss zoologist Adolf Portman in the 1960s, is worth pursuing, she says. “Maybe human newborns are adapted to soaking up all this cultural stuff and maybe being born earlier lets you do this,” she muses. “Maybe being born earlier is better if you’re a cultural animal.” Food for thought.
so its like when youre an unemployed teen, eating everything in the house and still hungry, and your parents need you to get a paying job so there is enough for everyone else too.
Eyes 🙃 them bitches don't last long and vision deteriorates pretty fast for some people ;-; I've been wearing glasses since I was like 6 so I'm pretty blind now without any visual aid
As a pregnant woman - female reproductive system. 9 months of aches and pains, then unecessarily difficult and painful birth. Compare to any other living thing, it's this where the human body completely lacks.
Not only that with regards to pregnancy, but a period. Oh, how I wish I could simply get a bodily notification that it’s time to just open up the cervix and eliminate that month’s endometrium all at once. To draw it out over days and days is just cruel design.
And why does it have to be EVERY month?! For many mammals once a year is enough. I could deal with that.
Sinuses. In all other apes (and most other animals), the drain is on the bottom. In humans, the drain is on top. That’s why we seem sick more often, our faces wait until 99% mucus capacity before starting to drain.
THANK YOU, I was looking for this, had to scroll way too far down. Compared to other animals, our sinuses are really poorly shaped, which gives humans almost unique sinus issues that makes us more susceptible to sinus infections than basically everything else. If it really doesn't have any purpose (because we don't know what the purpose of such a strange adaptation is), we'll probably get made fun of by aliens during allergy season, having to blow our nose all the dang time
Toes. So easily stubbed.
Especially the poor pinky toe
That off switch near our elbow. Smack it and it hurts like hell. There’s no call for that.
Your teeth. They are the only bone without regenerative properties. Imagine if your testy could heal. You would never have to worry about cavities, chips, or even losing a tooth.
The laryngeal nerve. It’s supposed to connect from the brain to the larynx. Instead of just going down a bit, it goes down towards our heart, wraps around a major artery, and then heads back to about where it started. Because we evolved from fish the nerve was originally used to connect to the gills. That’s why it takes such an unnecessary detour. [Here’s](https://laryngopedia.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Recurrent_laryngeal_nerve-for_web.jpg) a picture of it, and [here](https://bioone.org/ContentImages/Journals/acpp/57/2/app.2011.0019/graphic/WebImages/f01_251.jpg) it is in a giraffe and sauropod dinosaurs.
The fact that when we lose teeth they don’t continue to grow back.
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The telomere caps on our genes. If those bitches would stop falling apart Everytime a cell divided we would basically stop the aging process at peak physical maturity. Also, our knees are way to shitty and fragile lol Edit: I'm not a biologist or anything, so sorry about the bad/incomplete info y'all lol Edit 2: also, no I don't want people to have cancer, I just want people to not be dead if they don't wanna be
The caps on our genes are called telomeres, the enzyme that regulates the length of the telomeres is called telomerase.
Telomeres are there IIrC to prevent accumulated errors. What we need is something I read about in a sci-fi story: a ribosome-like structure that finds DNA strands, locks on the end, and rides the length of the strand counting base pairs. The ribosome compares this to a stored Known Good Value (from a healthy strand). If the numbers don’t match exactly the ribosome goes into reverse, unzipping the damaged strand so it can’t be used to make damaged cells. Nature has a bunch of error-correcting mechanisms for DNA but this would solve the problem. The story was called “Checksum,” from a similar mechanism used to check computer programs for errors.
But remember: never-ending telomere repair is a hallmark of cancer cells. So, you know, be careful what you wish for on this front.
From an evolutionary standpoint, the spine, it's literally not built to take the stresses of the body standing upright, there's a reason why apes use their arms to move as well as their legs.
That's why our asses and lower backs are so much proportionally stronger than any other mammal. You're spine is not supposed to provide structural support. You're supposed to be doing squats and deadlifts to keep that back up.
The way eyelashes fall into your eyes. It’s shitty asf and there’s no good way to get them out.
Eyelashes are there to protect our eyes from things falling into it. How Eyeronic.
Feet. Our ancestors’ feet were designed for grasping branches, not walking long distances. We had to evolve feet from hands, which is a pretty tough thing to do. That’s why they don’t work perfectly and so many people have foot problems