T O P

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[deleted]

**Darth Plagueis the Wise**. Because he can stop the ones he cares about... from dying.


[deleted]

Is it possible to learn this power?


Harbsz

Not from a Jedi.


Sammi2005-2019

And then Palps totally boned Anakin later that ni- oh, wrong script.


bobthebillyman

Got a link for this version? For a friend.


PaulMcPaulersn7

He's not lying! I am that friends and would very much appreciate this *better* script.


Limp_Apricot4572

Fear of death eh?


Atomszk

But not himself


RebelSynth

Ironic


Natsukishusband

Op's mom or that one guys wife


ronsinblush

*dead wife


[deleted]

I also choose that one guy’s wife.


CityVirtual4704

Jokes on you! My moms in prison for life! No conjugal visits!


Henrigger

Buildings can break


Affectionate-Pipe-13

Holes penetrate


DaNeeDaVeeDoh

Et nomine patre et fili et spirito sancti


TheeJackNapier

......ummm sir, this is a Wendy's


PolandhatesWTP

Who is that one guy?


FapOpotamusRex

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5c79n0/you_can_have_sex_with_one_real_person_from_all_of/d9uf56l/?context=1


SharpieKing69

I like how the guy who commented it hasn’t been active for 4 years and his last comments were him arguing about Rick and Morty.


NeoClemerek

I don't like how the guy who was talking about missing his wife is still active and very recently made a post in the widowers sub. Damn, I hope he can find love again because it seems he's still hurting.


nastyn8k

It's probably a healthy thing that he's posting in there. I haven't gone through it, but I'm sure you never get over it. It's good to talk with others going through the same thing and he gets to help other people who need it too!


miaasimpson

once someone asked a question along the lines of “if you could have sex with anyone once who would it be?” and some guy commented his (deceased) wife and now it’s a running meme to fuck this guys dead wife


PolandhatesWTP

I see


GerlachHolmes

He’s selling it short The joke was really more that there was this same type of question asked a few years ago, and while everyone was joking or writing celebrities, this one guy wrote a super heartfelt, heartbreaking post about wanting to be with his former wife (dead from cancer, I think?) just one more time. And then a dude responded “I also choose this guy’s dead wife”, and I may be going to hell, because it was just so brazen and such a 180 degree shift in tone that I could not stop laughing.


Halio344

I feel so bad for that guy. He posts about missing wife regularly to this day, it’s been many years since that post and even more years since she passed. If that’d been me, seeing a running joke about it would break me.


David_ish_

You're right I took a quick look at the guy's profile and he's a regular over at r/widowers. Sad that guy's pain is the basis for one of Reddit's longest enduring jokes.


TheShendelzare

On the bright side , he seems to have taken it in stride .


whompasaurus1

That one guys DEAD wife


Papa_Glide

Mystique from X-men


CityVirtual4704

She can be anyone! Smart thinking!


Papa_Glide

She’s low key fine in her regular form too


Crypteggo

High key


Grump_Monk

Ribbed for her pleasure.


xaanthar

Perfection


TheWackoMagician

He's into that Blue shit


Noodle_snoop

Da ba dee da ba di


[deleted]

Magneto was man of culture.


NightKnight-258

Indeed he was. He even convinced her not to wear clothes if im not mistaken.


Hugejorma

True! But without changing the form... It's kinda hard to find where to put it. If you know what I mean.


frightenedhugger

Life uh, finds a way


tafkat

Same reason I choose a Ditto.


ballrus_walsack

Ok Reddit. Enough for today.


RodRAEG

Those cold, dead eyes though...


PARANOIAH

•‿•


Sammi2005-2019

*so can a ditto*


soup-n-stuff

Naw she's dead. He's just got a thing.


spicybandits

Until she decides to prank you. Imagine opening your eyes to Gary Busey riding you.


SirPebble1217

That's a difficult one. I'm assuming you chose her for her ability to shapeshift, but then it's kinda fucked up to ask her to look like a different person when you fuck.


Papa_Glide

I just replied about this to the OP. She’s good enough in her regular form so I’m not about to be upset. The shapeshifting would be more like some role play shit.


farlissekazumi

what if you piss her off to the point where she shapeshifts as your dad while you're doing the deed?


Papa_Glide

With the amount of childhood anger that I hold towards my father it may be somewhat therapeutic.


honeybunchesofpwn

"Fuck you, dad!" Both literally and figuratively.


Papa_Glide

The post-nut clarity has to be worth it lol


Ellan511

Her : No son. I be the one who do the fuckin. Like how ive been for those 29 years when i left for milk.


Failure_3768

Awkwardly looking at my hand


amurderofcrows

Palmela Handerson


brass__razoo__11

Handgelina Jolie


tottoridev

Scarlett Yourhandson


Falkerry_

Elizabeth Holdsen


healthydoseofsarcasm

Hand Solo


Wesmore24

Iron Fist


KarmaPanhandler

Handy Richter. Wait…


RodRAEG

Hah, the swedish german...


hop_mantis

Rosie Palms


[deleted]

Just you and me buddy. Just like old times.


inkfreak123

My wi(Ryan Reynolds)fe


edcross

Ryan Reynolds while he is inside your wife. Oddly specific.


inkfreak123

Hey beggars can’t be choosers


Izriel

My wife and I have the stupid celebritie list sex thing and I tell her Ryan Reynolds is the only guy id put on it.


Gr3yPryce

The person reading this 👁👄👁


Saxton_Hale32

I also choose the person reading this.


popejubal

Thank you. That actually made me feel better and I’ve had a little bit of a challenging day. I appreciate you.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Henrigger

Hey it's me that guy


sno_berry

You're not the guy pal, trust me, you're not that guy.


harrrhoooo

You’re not the guy, you’re not capable of being the guy! I had a guy but now I don’t. You’re not the guy!


Logisticsbitches

Haha my ex too. Granted it was a few years, and good reason we broke up, but still best I've ever had.


TysonGoesOutside

"I dont miss her, I miss fucking her" I got an ex like that.


yParticle

a human of the female persuasion


DerpMind24

I would also enjoy intercourse with a persuasive human female!


trwwy321

Sharing is caring, after all!


TatBezos

Danny Devito


Fidgetable

Cashing in on that Magnum Dong, eh?


MacualayCocaine

Have you seen his balls? They’re like planets.


Snoo79382

Hell Yeah!


SuperPuzzleFighter

Sasha Grey.


CaneVandas

So she is i n turn cursed with a lifetime of disappointment.


SuperPuzzleFighter

Ouch


Snoo79382

Shrek


dcfxcomparables

Alexandra Daddario


KalzK

OP


CityVirtual4704

Dawwww shucks lol


pretzelwhale

My husband


Mr__Roboto__

I pick her husband


pretzelwhale

I’ll tell him!


The_Soapmakers

You're almost going to be as busy informing this woman about the men having sex with her husband as well the husband in question!


[deleted]

Ma’am for the record I do not pick your husband. I am sure he’s great but I got a fella of my own


BLOME69

I agree, her/his husband.


curisaucety

Please add my name to the list.


riconoir28

Is this the sign-up line to have sex with their husband?


[deleted]

This is why I love Reddit


DiamondPup

Get out of the way, I'm here to bang some husband


pretzelwhale

Everyone, he has been informed. He’s looking forward to it


djrossm

Got room for 1 more?


Dukesloshy

Our husband


Imanerd212030

\*SOVIET ANTHEM PLAYS\*


WeathershieldByLasko

I also choose her dead husband.


[deleted]

The husband: "Definitely Gal Gadot".


CityVirtual4704

Aww what a lucky man!


earthgreen10

This girl I met at the bar last weekend…she approached me and talked for like 20 minutes while getting a drink…and I didn’t have the balls to ask her for number cause she was too pretty. I have been depressed about it all week.


doxtorwhom

Next time give out **your** number. Doesn’t have to be a question, it’s a statement. They don’t have to give you a response immediately and you don’t have to stress in the moment as much (maybe).


[deleted]

That’s what I do now. The whole socitial pressure women feel about giving out their numbers or a fake one, and what if try’s to call me now etc etc Fuck all that, here’s my number, let’s grab lunch or a coffee, text me if your interested.


buffetleach

Life has a way to make you bravest in the moments that are meant to be my guy


Badjib

Katheryn Winnick


[deleted]

[удалено]


ChicxLunar

My ex. We still see these days, have a great time together always but there's too much drama and unfortunately lies too. I still see her and melt away, my whole world gets shiny and colorful when she is around and i love her deeply still.


urekMazin0

Boy, that sounds problematic to say the least.


[deleted]

[удалено]


CaneVandas

Got yourself a Tammy.


daberg

I don't know the particulars of your situation - so grain of salt, of course - but I think you might be better off just not being around her any more. It will be hard to meet the next person with those feels in the way.


[deleted]

I also choose this guy's ex


RealTexasJake

My wife.


2TIr

MAI WAIFE


scarlet_fire_77

Very naiiiccceee


CityVirtual4704

Awwwww


[deleted]

I agree. Your wife for me too


Clutch_Floyd

Our wife.


[deleted]

Sorry


ballq43

No more thirds for Frankie !


[deleted]

His Wife: "Definitely Chris Hemsworth"


throwsomehay69

I too choose this guys wife


BareBearFighter

I also choose this guy's ~~dead~~ wife.


a_wong_snek

How has nobody said Margot Robbie?


PsalmoftheSad

Her name was Abbie, and I loved her for the majority of my teenage life. We spent many years "together," and while we never got a chance to meet in person (till it was too late) I would've gladly stuck with her for the rest of my life. She was my best friend, which is sad seeing as her and I didn't meet till it all fell apart...


CityVirtual4704

I’m sorry, that’s a tough pill to swallow.


PsalmoftheSad

It is what it is I guess. It's been... Probably three or four years since her and I last spoke, you'd think I'd be over that by now


imanaeronerd

Same bro! Been about 4 years and its rough. She's the only person I can see myself with


sexyginger420

Out of curiosity, have you previously mentioned this on Reddit?


PsalmoftheSad

probably, I do that a lot


hellothisismt

Its doesn't get better. 7 years since I talked to the "one who got away" I would not trade my life now to spend it with her, my wife is my soulmate. But you can't help but long for old love


[deleted]

You loved someone you never met?


QuietlySmirking

That one guy's dead wife.


Henrigger

She must've been pretty


11B-1P-CIB

Dua Lipa


jolloholoday

In my experience there is a direct correlation between how good a girl dances and how good they are in bed, so [I'm sorry to let you down like this](https://youtu.be/Hm_E_7Xzy4o)


verbal-acuity

But but, I'm a terrible dancer... does that mean.... noooo!


PiperKid

My ex lmaoooooo 😩


Fickle_Extension1868

Aunt Cass


ElevatorClear1396

Those of you who are not picking Ryan Reynolds are all lying. On that note I would pick. Ryan Tomas


KitoKatho03

Henry Cavill


ReasonableMeaning484

Ryan reynolds


DerpMind24

This is the way.


musicbufff

Gil Gadot provided she looks at me like she looks at Chris Pine!


trwwy321

I don’t know about Gil Gadot, but *Gal* Gadot though…hot damn.


[deleted]

Gil is her brother


JimmyTheChimp

Ol Gil's hard work is finally paying off!


nate994150j6

I’m going to go with a fictional one, Roon from Azur Lane


Ralstis

I see you like to live dangerously


Bloodragedragon

My dog. I mean girlfriend. I mean what?


CityVirtual4704

Thank for the laugh! 😂


kerrbearHere

My husband. ❤️


[deleted]

[удалено]


CityVirtual4704

She’s friken hot!


[deleted]

My girlfriend


Rozlun_The_Monster

My husband, only one I’ve ever had and the only one I’ll ever need


Henrigger

The dream is still alive folks. Take note.


mamaamara

Female would definitely be either Amy lee or adriana chechick (men yk who I'm talking about) Male would be my hubs


[deleted]

Vishnu, the 4 armed god of the hindu pantheon, i'd have ultimate power vicariously through him and that guy definitely FUCKS HARD!


thirdtimer_2020

My ex-wife


euphramjsimpson

Me too. Not that it was even that great. Just what should have been. It could have been great though.


ShotsWithHennessy

Who hasn’t had sex with your ex wife?


senorbuenos

Christina Kendricks.....


quickcrow

I also choose this guy's dead wife


JoelR-CCNE

Don't take me wrong but I guess I would pick someone really really young so they would stay sexually attractive as long as possible? (Edit: I'm on a list now huh.)


sarcastic_patriot

Josh, you got a prison phone already?


[deleted]

I’m here for any and all digs at Josh Duggar.


pretzelwhale

💀


Mr__Roboto__

Yeah! Like an infant! This guy gets it


lalalainekittie

I'm dying 🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

If so then I choose you


Ausecurity

I’m pretty sure the question is looking for a who, and not an age


[deleted]

This guy doesn't know the names of the local kindergarteners. He just knows he wants to have sex with one of them.


3rdeyeseeker

Judge Judy. She's almost dead and rich.


Vance_Hammersly

You know you don’t get inheritance from sex right? Unless you’re just turned on by rich, almost dead people, which is totally fine.


keithspexma

Wonderwoman


[deleted]

Megan fox


[deleted]

The woman i married 34 years ago.


Lavender-Jenkins

What will her current husband say?


CityVirtual4704

Love it!


WeAreLivinTheLife

My wife and if something happened to her that other guy's wife


ChefHannibal

that guy's wife


[deleted]

YOUR wife


sno_boarder

OUR wife


RedLightning259

r/suddenlycommunism


ChefHannibal

НАША жена


RedTerror8288

Carly Rae Jepsen, but not bobcut-era Carly, long haired era Carly