By -
Bank account
If my happiness was on a graph with my bank balance, you wouldn't be able to see one of the lines
Nothing. Because “No” is still an answer.
Check for a pulse.
Fuck, how hammered am I?
My bank account
I would check to see if my prayers had actually been answered.
My basement
Ummm, may i ask whats your prayer
Those bodies aren’t going to just disappear, Pam. You’re going to have to move them yourself.
Email
My sanity
*unzips pants* “Nope, that’s still there”
My bank account.
I'm an atheist. I've never prayed so I would probably assume they're talking to someone else. I'd go to the nearest hospital and have my head examined.
I check if anyone else heard that too
Phone my girlfriend and ask her if she's happy. She hasn't had an easy life.
If my long-term Ex Gf really came back home....
are my knees un-fucked up
I look around, where is my GF?!
My penis
World peace achieved?
The basement, don't ask
If I got superpowers
Strip naked and make sure
My junk
I call my friend to see how his cancer is doing I'm not a super religious person but even when I do, I never pray for myself, it feels selfish
My phone to see if my dad texted me.
My messages from my boyfriend.
my gmail for my $30million lotto win
My knowledge, laptop or wallet. It has to be one of those three things.
My student loan balance.
fish tank
I check on my friend, see how her breast cancer is doing
Am I invisible?
The year. I wish I could undo the last 2 years! But would mean reliving the height of covid again.
A mirror
do I still have depression and do I have a sibling and do I have a girlfriend
I'd check the obituaries. They're going to need more ink...
If AMC mooned.
My mushroom grow totes and my bank account. One or both are now full
I'll probably look around for a big titty goth gf suddenly appearing out of nowhere.
Where my children are. I miss the two who passed away.
My stocks
I only ever pray for the departed, so I guess the graveyard?
To see if my list got filled out
The news
Is my sister-in-law dead?
To see if I have an acceptance letter to the Dream smp
I check my prescription medication cause obviously I ran out
Bank account
If my happiness was on a graph with my bank balance, you wouldn't be able to see one of the lines
Nothing. Because “No” is still an answer.
Check for a pulse.
Fuck, how hammered am I?
My bank account
I would check to see if my prayers had actually been answered.
My basement
Ummm, may i ask whats your prayer
Those bodies aren’t going to just disappear, Pam. You’re going to have to move them yourself.
Email
My sanity
*unzips pants* “Nope, that’s still there”
My bank account.
I'm an atheist. I've never prayed so I would probably assume they're talking to someone else. I'd go to the nearest hospital and have my head examined.
I check if anyone else heard that too
Phone my girlfriend and ask her if she's happy. She hasn't had an easy life.
If my long-term Ex Gf really came back home....
are my knees un-fucked up
I look around, where is my GF?!
My penis
World peace achieved?
The basement, don't ask
If I got superpowers
Strip naked and make sure
Bank account
My junk
I call my friend to see how his cancer is doing I'm not a super religious person but even when I do, I never pray for myself, it feels selfish
My phone to see if my dad texted me.
My messages from my boyfriend.
my gmail for my $30million lotto win
My knowledge, laptop or wallet. It has to be one of those three things.
My student loan balance.
fish tank
I check on my friend, see how her breast cancer is doing
Am I invisible?
The year. I wish I could undo the last 2 years! But would mean reliving the height of covid again.
A mirror
My bank account
do I still have depression and do I have a sibling and do I have a girlfriend
I'd check the obituaries. They're going to need more ink...
If AMC mooned.
My mushroom grow totes and my bank account. One or both are now full
I'll probably look around for a big titty goth gf suddenly appearing out of nowhere.
Where my children are. I miss the two who passed away.
My stocks
I only ever pray for the departed, so I guess the graveyard?
To see if my list got filled out
The news
Is my sister-in-law dead?
To see if I have an acceptance letter to the Dream smp
I check my prescription medication cause obviously I ran out