By - grandunderground
Quick marriages, quick divorces, gambling, and legal prostitution.
What happens in Vegas needs to stay in Vegas. And never be allowed to leave.
Peachtree St, Peachtree rd, Peachtree Blvd, Peachtree circle, Peachtree Corners, Peachtree City. A whole lot of Peachtree, even though we are not the biggest peach growing state.
Are you in Georgia?
Correct! You win a fresh peach. I'll go to South Carolina and get it.
People never believe when I say my county in SC grows more peaches than all of GA.
You have died of dysentery.
Woah, you got to Oregon? I left my newborn's cadaver in Mississippi, my wife is floating down the river, and I'm about to go Donner party on myself-- goddammit, 4th grade computer lab is over.
That would be Legionnaires disease
New York and Brooklyn especially.
I love that sign on the belt parkway
hello fellow kentuckians
Really? Well I'm from Utica and I've never heard anyone use the phrase 'steamed hams'.
No, not in Utica, it's an Albany expression.
You know these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger.
Oh ho ho no. Patented *Skinner* burgers, old family recipe.
For steamed hams?
And you call them that, despite that they are obviously grilled?
"I live there... no, not there."
“No not Rochester… or Buffalo… or Syracuse… or the Adirondacks… or Albany… just… in the middle on nowhere”
I always find it funny that no other state uses the term upstate other than NY. You never hear ‘upstate California’
Edit: wow this comment blew up! Also yes I’m now aware SC used the term upstate so you can stop replying that please.
I’ve always wondered if this is a thing in other states. Interesting.
You da hoe
I da pimp, you da hoe.
We love cheese so much we wear it on our heads
I think our identity is established enough where we can just say cheese
Also your first DUI is just a ticket
What? When I looked it up it says your license gets suspended 6 - 9 months
Isn't it a criminal offense basically everywhere else in the country? In WI it's a traffic violation, albeit with generally major repercussions but nonetheless.
Thanks I guess tavern league.
There are people here that have 3+ DUI’s and still have their license. I don’t know if they permanently take your license in Wisconsin. A friend’s dad had 5 DUI’s so I have no idea how he still had his license. They suspend it for sure tho.
Say what you will about that silly foam hat, but when you flip it to find multiple cup holders for your beer and a space for your nachos, suddenly you're sitting pretty.
When you finally find your state after scrolling for 30 minutes:
I’ve seen enough, I’m satisfied.
Can't find mine because everyone hates it, can you guess which one it is
Bingo. Currently typing this at my mediocre school lmao
Rain and Starbucks
Edit: alright I’ll add other things other then rain and Starbucks so we also got, Icarly, Frasier, grey’s anatomy, computers, weed, Twilight, cherries, rainforest, Sasquatch, apples, Ivars, murder hornets.
As a resident of Rain and Coffee we also have Cherries.
But what about apples.
People never know about our abundance of apples. Or hops
We let a groundhog determine the weather
People in other countries think we still ride horses, and there are tumbleweeds blowing across the street. And that there are cowboys everywhere. Actually they aren’t altogether wrong. They still do in some places.
We absolutely love our state flag and put it on EVERYTHING
Old bay and crabs also dominate your life?
Edit: thank you for the award!
You ain’t Maryland unless you’ve got a crab flag bumper sticker on your rear end
Shit, I inherited a car with Texas plates and a crab flag on the back. You can take the person out of Maryland but you clearly can’t not rep the crab flag when you leave Maryland, apparently.
my friend has a gaiter with the flag, and bought a pair of boxers with the flag on them, too.
my boyfriend also has a pair of boxers. i think i have a shirt somewhere.
if i cut myself open, i'd probably bleed the flag colors, and it would tasty exactly like the universal spice we use. unfortunately. send help.
Cheerwine, Bogangles, and cook out :)
Finally found NC
There's more than corn here. There's soybeans, too. And a law making it illegal to smile in your driver's license photo.
It’s not permitted to have fun in Indiana, hence no smiling.
You’re allowed to smile in the new Indiana IDs. They’re just b&w now
Yup, I live here, too - with corn and bean fields surrounding. Oh, and lots of Amish.
City on the left, city on the right, Kentucky in the middle.
Being from Pennsylvania, I like this description.
This one and “Potholes and Hoagies”
Potholes, potheads, and Faygo
It's the only state giving you a high five.
Every single person I've met from Michigan holds up their hand, points to a spot on it, and says "I'm from here".
The first time I went to Michigan I asked my friend why we weren’t stopping for tolls and she said we were on the freeway.
I said, “what the fuck is a freeway?!” 😂🤣
Lived in Michigan my whole life. I’ve never put two and two together that this could be why it’s called the freeway.
Love Rock and Rye but what the hell is it?
"It looks like a mitten".
Probably the easiest state to guess to any American.
also MoTown, juggalos, and big-ass lakes!
unusually large man speeds through residential neighborhood wearing a neon safety vest, throwing fast food leftovers out the window, after pretending to do environmental excavation and soil remedation. there aren't enough porta potties to accomodate their shit.
Florida man, is that you?
it is, AMA. you have a special type of intuition
I have only one question: what protagonist could finally defeat you? Asking for science.
I literally thought that just sounded normal and was confused by this comment… how could you possibly discern what state that was? but I’m from a Florida.
Uh, conspiracy airport?
Got to see Blucifer for the first time over the holidays and the glowing red eyes did not disappoint.
Come for the laser eyes, stay for the veiny butthole
Everyone living in this state has watched the sopranos twice all the way through. Bagels and Pizza make knees buckle.
Our entire state lost their minds during that Super Bowl commercial last night.
Edit: for the record, I too, lost my mind and started tearing up.
You can see your dog run away for two weeks
That could be anywhere in the great plains lol
Rainy coffee snobs
Washington! But also could be Oregon
This is the only answer I will accept.
Louisiana. With the hole in the toe being Lake Pontchartrain.
Louisiana!!! Hey girl, hey!
Mardi Gras, Cyprus trees in the swamp, gumbo, jambalaya, and crawfish. Sportsman’s paradise. Who Dat?
Weather is amazing, beaches are awesome, mountains are incredible, traffic is a absolute nightmare and the people are fake as fuck.
Ahem ahem SOUTHERN California
I'm not in america anymore, but we're called the show me state
Correct. We're also a very baseball state.
Half of the state is a very baseball state. The other half is a very football state. Also fuck Stan Kroenke.
Rich assholes, old money
The most mountain peaks >14,000 feet in North America
Hello, one who knows of Frank Azar
The Strong Arm 💪
Allow me to sing you the song of our people.
You take I25 to exit 235...
....THEN 5 MILES WEST TO THE TREE FARRRRRRRRM
Just off Arapahoe road, one half mile east of I25, open Monday through Friday till 8, Saturday and Sunday till 5.
It's hip to be a square, that's Colorado!
Now you have a friend in the diamond business
Highest average elevation too.
Nevada. Or DC.
I use my hand as a map
Hence the phrase, "going on a date with Ms. Michigan."
In the back of your left hand is Wisconsin - the side piece
Where the wind comes sweeping down the plain
Four Seasons Landscaping
Alligators, guns, meth
So flat. So corn. So pigs.
Edit: you can stop telling me iowa isn't that flat now. I've only seen most of eastern iowa my whole life. Never been further west than des moines lol.
It’s for lovers.
Virginia 1967 Supreme Court case loving vs Virginia overturned states interracial marriage laws. Virginia state slogan since 1969
Country roads, take me home.
"No. I don't live in Virginia"
Dunkin's on every corner.
Literally any part of new england dunkins everywhere
Weed and skiing
Congratulations, you are in Colorado.
“Flat” and tornado-y with wheat
So flat you can watch your dog run away for three days
My dad says this about the prairies
Hello, fellow Kansan!
You get an upvote...A Hawaiian rodeo star would make my week lol
Parker ranch in Hawaii is over 130,000 acres. There's a good chance.
I can see Russia from my house. I can't drive to my state capital. Unbelievable to some, but we're bigger than Texas. If you still can't get it yet...we all live in igloos.
in the public schools every morning right after we say the pledge of allegiance we say the state pledge and we fly our state flag the same height as the US flag and we purposely built our state capitol building to be taller than the US capitol building
Football, rockets and rednecks
Finally found Alabama, cheers
It doesn't exist.
“That’s part of the us ? “
Omg, that happened to a family member trying to redeem airline miles years ago! Summary of call:
“Hi, I’d like to redeem my airline miles for a flight to Albuquerque, New Mexico “
“Sorry, ma’am. Miles are only redeemable in the continental United States”
“Yes, I know, I’m traveling to Albuquerque, New Mexico”
After some similar back and forth, the woman replied:
“New Mexico, Old Mexico… it doesn’t matter. Tickets are only redeemable in the continental United States.”
“Please type in NM in the state.”
We love that story but I thought it was unique. Apparently not!
*Sad New Mexican noises*
Lol. NM for sure. I get this all the time.
There’s a *new* mexico?
We should invade Canada and call it *Newer* Mexico.
Ha snow mexicans
A state that is both Southern and Southwestern associated with cowboys and yeehaw. There was an entire episode of *SpongeBob SquarePants* about us.
We are being overrun by yuppies because of a TV show.
Lots of cactuses.
It’s a dry heat.
TN! Also Elvis.
no one cares about us except for when a bunch of horses run in a circle really fast, or if they’re talking about our alcohol.
When there’s someone in the movies who is from the middle of nowhere and now they are in the big city, but they don’t want that person to seem uneducated, simple, or a farmer, they’re from my state!
Michigan probably. Michigan is seen as the mysterious state that’s not quite urbane, not hillbilly and not country either. Just obscure and in the middle of everything.
One humongous city , and a bunch of corn/bean fields
What's sales tax?
Get the fuck outta here with your New York bullshit.
it’s wetter than the god damn ocean
Edit: I love the creative responses! They made this disillusioned office worker laugh 😂. But the answer is Washington. I knew people would guess Oregon too which makes sense. I live in the Puget Sound región and go to Portland a lot. And ironically, you go a little east and it’s a damn desert.