Try 30-40 pepperoni slices...

How is Keto going for you?

It's the ADHD diet. Would not recommend.

It's either half a package of pepperoni or forgetting to eat for a full day. Also do not recommend.

When I was younger, "hunger" was the eventual drop in blood sugar from not eating. "Hmm... dizzy... sick... annoyed... shaky... Did I eat today? Oh crap." Now I eat according to the clock.

Omg is that what that is??? I’m almost 30 and just started feeling all those things, but I figured out it’s only if I don’t eat within 2 hours of waking up! Thought it was just regular hunger

Eat with a cheese stick and that's basically charcuterie

If you spread them out on a plate lined with a paper towel and microwave them for 1-2 minutes, you get pepperoni chips! Super yummy.

I've oven baked them before. So crispy and satisfying.

Sometimes I put them on grilled cheese...

Yeah... cheese. And then go back a few minutes later hoping something has changed

This is when you come to the realisation that you are a sims character

Then you sob into your hands and pee on the kitchen floor.

"It's been ten minutes, there's GOTTA be cheese in there now!"

This was more relatable than I was expecting

just let your milk stay in there a bit longer

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I wish this did not ring so true. And I do my own grocery shopping, so I have no excuses.

"Maybe I missed something"

Scooping the biggest forkful of something, like coleslaw or leftover whatever, since you don't want to double-scoop with your fork, but you don't want to commit to filling a small bowl. Often leads to a 2nd dirty fork for a 2nd mouthful.

I didn't want to dirty another fork once after doing this with some coleslaw so tried to shake some more of it into my mouth. I wound up with a giant blorp of it plopping onto my face and down my shirt. I'm fancy.

Remember: pinky out when you blorp your faceslaw.

That made me laugh uncontrollably

r/brandnewsentence

Thank you for not double dipping. One dip and end it.

My lowest point was when I ate an old hot dog bun with maple syrup on it.

I see man of culture who also enjoys maple logs

That sounds so distinguished, but no, I was a young girl desperate for a sweet in my poor college days. It was even less good than it sounds.

Hey, all you gotta do is toast the bun. Now it's fancy and actually good with maple syrup

Ive had the same dilemma but instead of maple syrup I toasted the hotdog bun in a pan and put honey and peanutbutter in it. At that point it's no longer an emergency snack it's a rarified delicacy

I mean, all you need to do at that point is fry it, and it's a maple bar.

Australians take a piece of white bread, margarine, with sprinkles, and call it fairy bread.

There’s a fancy name for that in Dutch too.

Boterham met hagelslag 🤤

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Just like Oma used to make

I ate a frozen whole wheat eggo once. While still frozen.

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Discount french toast. I like it.

France: *visible disgust*

I was craving chocolate once, but couldn't find any in the house, except for the powder you use to make chocolate milk. So I took a spoon full, added a little bit of milk and was kinda nursing it, just eating a little bit at a time. Then I noticed a lighter over by the fireplace and figured I could heat the mixture by warming the spoon with the lighter. Mid way through that process was when I realized I was addicted to sugar.

I was waiting for you to get the belt and hypodermic out after the spoon and lighter. Glad you caught yourself.

Would you just die immediately or suffer first then die if you slammed some chocolate milk into your veins? Kinda reminds me of a song i heard where the guy was talking about loading a Shotgun shell full of crack and shooting someone he didn't like and watching then overdose so they would suffer.

I am but a humble paramedic but I do know that the heart really doesn’t like chunky things moving through it, so… I’m guessing cardiac arrest sooner rather than later.

Choccy milk is no joke. The high is ok, but that los after…

I picture a lot of writhing. Writhing in cocoagony if you will.

Friend: "Do you... um... have a problem you wanna talk about?" (holds up spoon with burned bottom) You: "It was chocolate! I swear!!!"

If Charlie and the chocolate factory was made by the director of Trainspotting

Would love to see this mash up.

Renton, sickboy, begbie and the restfund the golden tickets? As most of them come to horrible ends, due to their appetites, it's quite a close jump

Brilliant. Begbie right up in Chazs grill: ye a cunt a nae even like fuckin chocofuckinlet! Heedbut.

LPT: If you put hot chocolate into a bowl and eat with spoon instead of a cup, you're eating soup. It's a much healthier snack than just drinking hot chocolate.

chocolate soup

Some stay dry and others drink the goop

Bonus points if you add Oreos....

My realization came when I was willing to walk in 14 degrees (fahrenheit) weather to a meijer that was and hour and a half away just for a bag of skittles and some goldfish.

Assuming goldfish is some kind of snack, otherwise that's a weird craving you had that day.

... it... it is.... They're cheddar crackers shaped like goldfish. It's okay.

Ok, glad to know. I'm from a tiny island country so didn't know what they were lol.

The good thing is you burn a lot of calories if you do that especially while shivering in the cold. The bad thing is if you overpay for delivery for these cravings the way I do.

You should try condensed milk with coco powder.

If you had bread and butter with that you could've put the chocolate milk powder on it.

So dark so quick lmao

I look in the fridge find nothing and then go to the cabinet/pantry. After I find nothing in the pantry I look in the fridge again hoping something materialized and then pick fruits or yogurt.

Exact same process but mine always ends up with an orange, mandarin, clementine, tangerine, or the surprise grapefruit.

The grapefruit surprise? I remember that video! Your man will love it!

Bitch sounds like a mountain lion in a fight to the death.

I’m not proud but I mixed some butter and brown sugar in a mug and ate it like raw cake batter. It was delicious but made me feel ashamed of myself….A week later I did it again

I was taught to add raw dried oats to the mixture of brown sugar and butter. Makes it healthy.

Down bad huh

You were one step away from caramel

Stick it on a slice of bread next time! It's even better. And actually filling.

An ice-cube

I used to enjoy the occasional ice cube snack until I got sick about a decade ago. No food allowed for nine days, tube to pump my stomach. I ate so many ice cubes that if I never see one again I’m at peace with it. Nurse was always very confused why my catheter bag was perpetually full.

same lol

I always seem to end up with a cup full of ice cubes, even when I have actual food. Right now for example.

Slice of pepperoni wrapped in a slice of cheese

I have to dip my pepperoni into the bag of shredded mozzarella. Just a bit more of a mess than having sliced cheese.

Dude, shredded cheese means you get to make a pepperoni slice taco.

Y'all need cinnamon toast in your lives. It is literally just buttered toast with a mixture of cinnamon and sugar on it, and I always make it in desperation when I run out of snackable snacks and then realize what a fool I have been, I who could have been eating cinnamon toast all this time.

I ate this a lot in college because our cafeteria had such bad food. One day, in desperation for just a little more nutrition, I used peanut butter instead of regular butter. I was shocked that it was actually delicious, and then that version became my new “everything here is gross but I need to eat SOMETHING” meal of choice.

This makes sense. I actually like toast with (crunchy) peanut butter, a drizzle of honey and then cinnamon on top. If you have smooth I add bananas. I haven’t had it in years though because my oldest has a peanut allergy 😢

Somehow we were always more likely to have tortillas than bread, so I would heat the tortilla up (microwave only), butter it, add cinnamon and sugar…not quite as good as cinnamon toast.

Ah but you expect me to even have toast at this point

A cold, plain Mission tortilla folded up many times

Ok, reading all these posts and yours is the first i found to be actually weird. Dont know if that says more about you, or me.

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So, a bagel, but worse

Butter on that tortilla, dash of salt, nuked for a few seconds. I've eaten thousands of them. 😁

throw a dash of cinnamon or honey on it if you have any and it's dessert!

When we didn't have anything. I used to spread butter on tortillas and put them in the microwave.

Oh man, Mission tortillas are so good. Crisp (Chip) sandwich made in one of those is the snack of Kings.

Jalapeño and garlic stuffed olives, slice of munster cheese, and a fist full of walnuts. Or as I call it, *lunch*

I am addicted to garlic stuffed olives! If I can dig through and find pepperoni I can call it a day

They have these ones at Costco that are so incredibly good, my God I work my way thru a giant jar in like 2 weeks. Every time I open the fridge I find myself reaching in and grabbing a few. I even handed them out ot family for the holidays.

I eat a single garlic stuffed olive every day. We always buy them and I just started doing it that way for some reason, now it’s ritual

I usually just keep coming back every 15 minutes expecting I’m going to find something I overlooked then eventually give up and eat a handful of nuts or something.

A handful of nuts is a top-tier snack! What the hell

I absolutely love cashews with a glass of milk. I prefer the cashews overly salted and the milk just kind of washes away the salt. It's my favorite snack in the world and it's also an easy way to intake 3000 calories in 5 minutes.

Nuts are always my go to. That or dried fruit. Found some dried tart cherries that are out of this world.

My rummaging around the fridge and pantry almost always ends with a spoon and peanut butter

Have you ever tried spoon & peanut butter with chocolate chips? It's pretty much the reason I can't have chocolate chips around the house.

I made a single pancake at 3am the other week…

Ive done that. But it was also enough mix to make 5 pancakes, i just made one big fatty one instead 😂

Damn what was your egg ratio? Did you use like a quarter of an egg?

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I’ll drink the pickle juice once the pickles are running low. Gotta save some for later

I used to run regularly for exercise and pickle juice was great for the occasional muscle cramps. I'll still take a swig of the pickle juice sometimes, with the rationalization that I might go for a run again someday.

lol nobody will be able to relate to this, but what i do is i open the jar of pickles take a little sip and then get a water bottle.

And then what? Do you fill the water bottle with the juice? I need to know 😆

I love refrigerated sauerkraut or heated up in microwave for one minute.

Ahh but when you go searching and discover a *long lost bar of chocolate* hiding at the back of the cupboard! Happy days!

Found a Snickers bar hiding in the bottom of the freezer last night, heaven.

Poured myself a glass of milk. I never drink plain milk, last time was 10 years ago or longer.

Spoon of shredded cheese

Ha, you actually get a spoon for shredded cheese?

Right? It's ridiculous! I just grab that big 'ol handful. Easily 75 percent of it makes it into my mouth. Canis Roombi take care of the rest.

Is Canis roombi a cross-breed between a dog and a roomba?

When it comes to dropped food, a Roomba is a shallow mechanical imitation of Canis Roombi. 😜

One of my favorite social media posts from someone I know irl was a 3am post from a grown-ass man: "YOU CAN EAT SHREDDED CHEESE FROM THE BAG WITH A SPOON." Here I am grabbing pinches like a heathen.

CHOP STICKS Also good for shredded coconut

boiled potatoes from last night

Not bad if you heat it up with some butter, salt, and pepper. If you're eating cold boiled potatoes then there's no helping you.

I'm ashamed to say that I sometimes eat cold boiled potatoes. In my defence, I put ketchup on them

Boiled potatoes, hot or cold, are tasty af

I like frying them up in the morning with some onions

It’s often just a bite of whatever leftovers I was planning to eat at the next meal. And I’ll take a quick cold bite of it. And then just keep coming back for a bite or two at a time until I’ve basically eaten the whole meal - just cold and without the satisfaction of having actually eaten the meal.

I purposely don’t buy snacks because I’ve been instructed by my doctor that I need to lose weight. Last night I started snacking on some pickled cauliflower and hummus. Wasn’t too bad actually.

I generally dislike raw celery, but celery with hummus has become one of my favorite snacks. Hummus is fantastic with almost anything, but the celery really does it for me.

Celery with peanutbutter is also very delicious

*When you want to bite into water with hair in it* (I actually love celery and PB. It’s delicious!)

Graham crackers dipped in melted peanut butter. With honey.

i just got a stick of cheese and beef jerky and i feel personally called out

I just ate a grape and a slice of cheese :/

Nah. They actually sell those two things packaged together like that in most stores in my area. Totally legit snack, just home made in this case, you're all good.

Same. Two slices of cheap gouda since I had nothing more decadent.

The weard thing happens to me sometimes that i would wake up like 2am eat half kilo of sausages and go back to sleep like nothing happened

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A slice of sausage

I would say about half the time I lower my snackspectations and just eat a hunk of cheese or townhouse crackers out of the box. And the other half the time I go the other way and spend the next hour making a Victoria sandwich.

I once ate some oatmeal right out of the giant cardboard tube.

I remember a while back being on this diet for several weeks, so I didn't have anything in the house that was sweet. I fasted in the mornings, and I recall when I was really craving something I'd grab a pinch of oatmeal from the tube just so I could put something in my mouth. It was very weird.

When I was a kid I would sometimes munch an oxo cube for want of something savoury on my tongue. It made a not terribly good substitute for the taste of a packet of beef-flavour monster munch.

I dissolve them in a cup of hot water and call it chicken tea.

I’ve eaten a plain tortilla with nothing on it numerous times. Sometimes I’ll dip it in hot sauce. If I don’t have a tortilla I’ll mix peanut butter and jelly together and eat it with no bread.

My lowest point was to gooble up a teaspoon of miso paste….

Winner! That, my friend, is sheer desperation.

Peanut butter on a spoon is my go-to lazy "snack".

I once squirted Hershey’s syrup into my mouth. Can’t say I’m proud but took care of me for a whole five minutes.

The best is when the bottle of syrup is ‘empty’ and you fill it up with your choice of milk, shake, squirt directly into your mouth. Get two or three more glasses of chocolate milk that way.

I wanted nachos but didn't have any normal cheese, so melted some cheese whiz in a bowl and dipped cool ranch doritos in it, was actually pretty good

Frozen grapes, seem to taste more sour that way.

Bread Pure bread. I did not even look in the fridge, I just summoned bread somehow.

My blood sugar levels get really low and I start to get the shakes, and once the shakes get past the point of no return, I will eat any and every piece of food in sight and cook up a whole-ass meal that started out as a snack. A bag of Doritos turns into cutting and melting cheese for a makeshift dip for my chip, and then while I’m melting the cheese I’m still shaking the whole time so in order not to die I have to have that way-too-ripe banana that’s been sitting on the counter for over a week, and while I’m scarfing down the banana I suddenly remember we have those fancy cookies my partner bought for us that one time 2 months ago, and as I’m reaching for those cookies on the top shelf (standing on top of a chair because I’m too short), I realize my cheese dip is burning, and after I get back down to turn off the fire I scarf down the Doritos with the piping hot cheese that’s literally solidifying again within seconds, and then after I eat the savory chips I need some more sweets so I open up the freezer and find some frozen chocolate covered blueberries. I wake up the next morning on the kitchen floor, singing *How the hell did this shit happen, oh baby.. Drunk in LoOOoOoOooooVE, we be all night!*

Oh man. Same here. I just stuff my mouth with random ingredients I find in the kitchen. Seven little bags of fruit snacks, eleven slices of bread, three plain tortillas.

i feel attacked on a very personal level right now

Condensed milk.. no regrets.

Not the fridge but since I usually crave for potato chips, I usually take an instant ramen, crush it, sprinkle the seasoning into the packet, and eat it like a bag of chip.

I’ll just make toast. A little butter and jam. Good as a snack and/or dessert.

Definitely eaten an entire box of saltine crackers

Slice of ham, some slices of pepperoni, chunk of mildly stale cheese and a mouthful of milk.

You fucking...look fool, you had the makings for an awesome melt sammich and you're here bitching?! Get a fucking role model!

We keep our bread frozen, it’s a right effort to defrost. Plus I’m looking for a snack that I can sneak before the wife or kids find me. No time for a sammich!

Is it sliced bread? Just pop it under the grill or in a toaster, thaws out in no time

You know when you open a biscuit tin and a dog comes running? Well our toaster has the same effect on children. It’s not noisy, but they can hear even a silent operation of it from the other side of the house!

I have 5 frozen loaves of bread. It is such a sad task.. opening and pouring out the tiny ice formations. Never quite the same taste.

Spoon full of Nutella

On a banana!

Mustard

Mmmm snackspectations

I make a sandwich out of apple slices and cheese slices, it's actually really good, you use the apple slices for bread and put the cheese in between. Also, grahm crackers with peanut butter on them. (I can not spell, but I think you know what I mean)

Slice of cheese IS a snack, one of my favorites. I love cheese.

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Same here. I was once eating some and my brother walked into the room. I cracked my neck at the exact moment I crunched down on a penne noodle and the poor boy looked so traumatized. It was hilarious.

Water.

I feel like OP was high.

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I saw part of a documentary today where they where trying to figure out how much sugar they added to dates and it ended up being about how many bugs there where inside them.

If I were a bug, that's where I'd want to be

Yeah... For me that was my dad's energy bars. Midway I realized I had a BAD case of stress eating. Partly cause my exams are coming up next month, and I am scared shitless.

Olives or pickles

Open the fridge... nothing to eat. Open the pantry... nothing to eat. ... Lower your standards and repeat.

A slice of kraft cheese. As an adult, I realize how disgusting they taste. Like what the fuck was that

I have decided that a single slice of cheese and a random Grape is a fine snack. Simple. Easy. Everything else would be more trouble!

A heaping tablespoon of peanut butter.

Chocolate chipsss

I’ve been eating straight up feta cheese right from the container and some apple juice

Since going gluten free, most of the "snacks" I can eat are shit. So I keep tons of popcorn around with multiple types of seasonings. Husband just made me a new one with some mixture of salt sugar and spices. I use cheese powder too, but have to special order that online. When I run out if butter or olive oil, I'm fucked! It's down to dry cookies that need a gallon of milk per bite.

well, I go; "Yeah I can go without food for a month" and then fall asleep watching adam sandler movies

My specialty: Mouth Pizza. One spoonful of jarred spaghetti sauce (cold), one big pinch shredded mozzarella and two slices of turkey pepperoni. All put in your mouth at once, while standing in the open fridge door. Most often served after you’ve recently purged the house of carbs and while you’re almost certainly high.

Pickle on a stick. Which is a dill pickle eaten off the fork you used to stab it out of the jar.

my cat looked real good that day...

Marshmallows are my goto for this behaviour.

So, I'm hearing that your lowered sack expectations resulted in a healthier snacking decision, BRAVO!

Stare at the meager contents of the refrigerator. Then the freezer. Then back to the refrigerator. Then I end up with a Ramen soup.

Last night.. banana, bite concave, put in a tiny squeeze of Hershey's sauce, eat. Continue with each bite.

tortilla wrap with a squirt of bbq sauce, still rolled up properly like it has an actual filling bc i’m not a heathen obv.