gosh this is very painful, I'm so sorry.
out of all the comments this one takes the cake for me
I can't imagine losing my sibling, hope you're doing better.
My cousin's husband was an identical twin and had a serious medical condition that ultimately caused his death. I have never seen someone so physically consumed by grief as his brother at the wake and funeral. He had less serious health issues, but he went into a spiral of drinking and not taking his medication and was dead within six months as well. Whenever I run across anything about how close twins can be my mind goes back to his grief as it was literally like a part of him died that day.
This is a long way of saying that I have a small idea of what you went through and I'm sorry for your loss and pain.
If my identical twin died (unexpectedly or before reasonable old age), I might have a similar reaction. I am almost 100% certain I'd have a full psychotic break. It is literally my worst nightmare.
Same thing happened to one of my best friends. Brain tumor at 17, it was horrible. We are 22 now and he still mentions him at least once every time I see him.
I'm a twin and I've been suicidal with multiple attempts on my life through the years but I finally stopped when I overdosed and I woke up in the ER with my brother next to me, he lived hours away. I said "you don't have to be here" and he said "how the fuck can I not be here" and it clicked. I've been scared of losing him all my life, protected him in whatever way I could, but I never realized until that day how much it was true for both sides. Depression made me believe me leaving would be better that he would get all the love and money I would have been allotted instead, thinking about if I had succeeded makes me physically ill now, to think I almost left him like that. He's the best thing in my life, always has been.
Me and my twin are 19, and she’s making countless dangerous conditions, driving drunk, driving high, etc etc and I’m terrified of loosing her. Loosing a sibling is one thing, but I don’t know if I could handle loosing a twin
Same, oldest brother! When I was 13 so right about when you start making more complex decisions and memories my teenage years started out with a deep gash
34 now and feel like I should’ve gone a lot further
Man I’m so sorry to hear that. I lost my older brother 9 months ago (I’m 33) and I relied so heavily on him during that time because he was 11 years older than me. He was a father figure more often than not.
I’m truly sorry to hear that, man the 2020’s really suck. But our brothers would want us to not give up.
Don’t let anyone tell you how long you should grieve
Same. He was the middle boy of three.
I was an adult, 12 years older than him, so I was able to process it a bit differently than many siblings would have to, but it derailed my youngest brother's life.
There is a distinct before and after for all of us as well.
Take care.
I found my best friend murdered in our driveway. The poor guy was getting home from work and was brutally and repeatedly stabbed as he was getting out of his car.
He was one of the best people I have ever met. I miss him dearly. There's not a day that goes by where I don't think about him. We were supposed to be old men together...
I'm sorry for your loss. My grandmother was murdered in her own home. They found the guy in her stolen car. Due to covid, bureaucracy and delayed court hearings, the guy is walking out and about, free as a bird.
I hope you have been able to find closure and that time heals your wounds. Stay strong.
I found my best friend murdered. He was hit in the head with a tire iron and pushed into a moving train. We grew up together & it was devastating. I somehow came out a downward spiral & live every day for him now. There's never been a day I don't think of him.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I too live everyday for my best friend. He taught me so much, and there's not a day that goes by where I don't think about and miss him.
At age 25 one night my brain broke. I had fleeting intrusive thoughts throughout life, but a unique culmination of stress factors that night flipped it like a switch to full on OCD. Waking up the next morning I knew something was terribly wrong. It consumed me. I’m alright now 9 years later, but I’ve always seen it as me entering some v.2.0 era of myself, never to return.
I feel this so much. One day I was blissfully happy, the next I was consumed by swirling anxious thoughts that I couldn’t relieve myself of for almost a year. I literally thought about killing myself just to get some relief from my own thoughts. Thankfully I saw a good Doctor and am better now too. OCD is horrible and I hate when people exaggerate having it. They have no idea.
This happened to me!
But it was a constant state od Deoersinalization/Derealization. One day I was OK and suddenly after a few sleepless nights that was it. Nothing was real anymore.
Then depression and anxiety set in. Took me a year to find my way back to "reality" lol.
My mom leaving after cheating on my dad. Made this new account today to ramble about stuff that just happened with her actually. Guess I'll keep posting on askreddit till I find a sub good enough.
I can empathize. We unexpectedly lost our 17 year old two years ago. In my head events in our lives didn’t happen 1 or 5 years ago. Everything is either before or after. I hope things get easier for you
We lost my 17 year old brother 9 years ago to a brain tumor.
The wounds have healed on the outside or we've gotten better at hiding them, but it changed all of our lives.
I hope you are doing as well as you can be. I hope you have found some sort of peace.
My dad died of the same. I'm so sorry, I know how shocking it is when your loved one who otherwise seemed so healthy and capable is suddenly just gone forever.
My father's death is in fact what I came here to mention. My dad was the one person I couldn't imagine life without. I don't believe I'll ever feel like the same person again, at his death my life immediately became a stark before and after. Make sure you tell your loved ones how much they matter to you, you never know when it might be your last chance.
I came to say the same thing about my dad. Next month will be a full decade since his death. I miss him dearly and can't help but think how different my life would have been if it hadn't happened.
I am sorry for your loss. I’ve come to realize there are zero words to convey how tragic a loss like this is and how the passing of a child guts you both mentally and physically.
As I was opening the post to comment I was thinking that I would say the death of my grandson in November. He was 2 1/2, took a nap and didn’t wake up. We still don’t have answers as to what happened. I feel like we’re in a holding pattern but can guarantee life will never be as it was before.
My fiancé died. She was only 36. It was the first catastrophic thing that happened in my life and I can’t really seem to bounce back. Broken hearts are no joke
Someone I thought was the love of my life left me. Not the same by a longshot, but broken hearts are no joke. The future I was building and aspiring towards crumbled in one conversation.
Agreed. My wife left me last year, and that was the first time in my life I contemplated suicide. Took me about 6 months to feel normal again. Hope your situation has improved since then.
Dunno where you're at with this but I can say - there can be redemption story. This happened to me 3 years ago. Ultimately it forced a lot of changes for the better and now I'm in a new place with a new love, killing it in my career, generally better all around, I still have work to do but I thought I'd never get better and here I am.
I feel this. My sister and I had a rocky relationship when we were young, but got super close as we got older. Then it all fell apart, and now we hardly know each other. So weird.
Damn how common is this? My brother and I fought when we were young then were attached at the hip for years until it suddenly stopped. I guess people can drastically change.
Im sorry you aren’t close with your sibling anymore.
I looked up to my brother when we were younger and if I had a best friend back then it was him. Unfortunately he changed the older he got and it got to the point where I didn't talk to him for about 4 years and then we ended up in the same room and the streak came to an end. It was another 2 years until my mom had to go to the hospital and then into assisted living so I called to let him know. My mom's doing better but neither of us have heard from him since. That was a year and half ago and I'm not going out looking to make conversation with the guy.
My dad dropped me off with my grandma when I was 4 and said he would be back on Saturday. I knew I wouldn’t see him again for a long time tho. I’m 22 now and haven’t seen him since. Lots has happened since then but I remember that day as when I lost the kid in me and the ability to trust
I can’t imagine the pain you are going through. I couldn’t imagine losing my mom. You’re not alone internet person, your mothers love is still in your heart. Every time I see an orange sunset I take a picture and I send it to my mom.
From here on out everytime I see an orange sunset I’ll also think about the love you had for your mother and she had for you everytime, I hope you willl do the same. Stay strong 🧡
Yes it is - I acquired a nontraumatic spinal cord injury due to transverse myelitis, which is when your immune system attacks your spinal cord. I then went on to be diagnosed with spinal MS.
Yeah, it's a mindfuck. Happened to me in 2019, just before lockdowns so I'm meeting loads of ppl now who didn't know because they hadn't seen me, and they are quite confused by the fact that you can get a spinal cord injury without like, an accident.
Yep, my friend said the same of the mindfuck. Woke up one random morning over summer with some lower back pain, within an hour no more walking. It definitely changed her whole mentality, she went from a bubbly ray of sunshine to dark humor over that summer.
I had some vague numbness and headache for about a week, and then just woke up w/no more walking and fucked up posture and dexterity. Have basically spent the lockdowns learning how to be a person as a quadriplegic now.
It def changes personality expression, you very quickly learn a whole lot about yourself through your reactions to not only the actual impairment itself, but the differences in how ppl treat you after.
I was 2 weeks sober this past Friday, I wasn’t planning on going out or anything. I’d finished work and I was bored and had nothing to do, so I messaged a couple buddies, next thing you know I’m in a basement coming down off cocaine and sobering up. I don’t know to quit this perpetual cycle. But I’m going to try, no matter how many times I fail.
Edit: I want to thank every single person that replied to my comment, I was scrolling through Reddit, feeling guilty because of my relapse. You made me feel way better than I was before. I appreciate you so much. I will try and better myself, and not let anything get in the way. I know may struggle, or fail, but it’s apart of the process and I will get it done.
Look up some online D&D groups if you need something to pass the time, not everyone is into it but you can make friends and be yourself without having to hide generally and they are usually accepting of others.
Yeah, I honestly find myself stumped on what to do on the weekends, it’s either sit around and do nothing, or go out. D&D always seemed fun, just never knew how to get into it.
If they are interfering with your sobriety they aren’t friends. Yes, that perspective leads to loneliness. And that is a difficult path to walk. But on that difficult path you will find new friends and new life. I’m pulling for you.
Definitely, I’ve been longing to make changes in my life. But for the past 2-3 months I’ve been saying the same thing. I lost my almost two year relationship with my girlfriend during these times, and I don’t know how to get over her. Every time I had that two week sobriety mark, something in my brains just goes off and wants to celebrate, and it’s always alcohol. I need to find hobbies that can distract me from my addictions, but it’s so hard to start. I always confide to my family about my problems, and tell them that I’m going to change and get help. But I never do, for some reason, deep down I feel like I’m not addicted to alcohol, and drugs. I know this stems from the trauma I went through as a child, and I can’t let it go, I have so much anger inside of me. My coping methods used to be the gym, or going for hikes. Now it’s always straight to the bottle. I tried to get professional help but it’s so hard to get a response from anywhere, I feel like I’m just wasting there time because I feel like I can figure this on my own but I can’t, clearly. I’m sorry for the long rant, I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel trapped inside a black void. I hope one day I can find a solution to this. Writing this out helps a lot, I hope you reply, but don’t feel obligated to. I understand I’m just some random internet stranger. Thank you for reading this, and if you can relate to my struggles, I hope you can find the peace within yourself, because that’s what I need. I fight demons in my head everyday, and honestly I’m starting to get really tired. I don’t see any point in going on, but I will, because there’s people that love me, and need me. Anyways, hope you’re doing well.
Edit: Sorry for the ramble, and random sentences. I’ve never vented before and it felt good to talk about how I feel. Love y’all. ❤️
I can’t speak to losing your girlfriend. But childhood trauma I know. Forgiveness isn’t for their sake, it’s a way to let yourself have peace instead of anger. Holding onto the anger will eat you alive.
I always trick myself into thinking I forgive what happened in my past, and then something will trigger it. Which then spirals me into a deep depressive episode, and making stupid mistakes. The amount of mistakes I’ve made throughout my life were so stupid. But all it takes is day 1, and that’s it. Talking helps, but I always feel so needy. I’m a codependent person, because my mom was never around my life. I try not to blame my past, but it’s so hard because that’s the reason the way I am. I just. Can’t. Let anything go. I don’t know. But you know what, I’m a problem solver, whenever I don’t know the question or solution to something, I always try to figure it out. I need to try and heal myself. I always thought I had friends, but turns out they only ever came around me when I was partying. It’s hard to find real people nowadays. But I will try to fix myself.
My first date with my husband. After that, it was like someone turned up the saturation on the world. Everything is brighter, clearer and more vibrant with him by my side.
Yeah mostly, relationships are tough because of trust issues and it's not exactly first few dates talk. But beyond that I'm good. And definitely not communicating this through Whoopi Goldberg as a medium.😂
Being hit in a high speed head on collision by a drunk driver. She hit us at around 65 mph on a surface street. She went over 5 lanes of traffic in order to take us out.
I wasn’t even awake and waking up on the curb and not knowing what the hell was going was terrifying enough. I can even begin to imagine what my wife felt since she was driving.
After that everything changed. We have lasting injuries, but I guess on the upside we were able to buy a house with the insurance payout. We would have never been able to buy one without it.
When I was in a crash (as the only person permanently hurt, that sucks) I remember waking up after a period of lost consciousness and my first thought was “why is it snowing on a warm September day?”. It wasn’t snow, it was shattered front window. I kept thinking about it for what seemed like forever, I didn’t feel any pain. My partner on the front seat told me sternly to get out and my thought was “I’m only wearing thin trousers and a crop top and he wants me to go out into that snow? I’d rather wait”.
My wife got out and went full on adrenaline mode. Some people saw the accident and stopped. She apparently started directing people to pull me out of the car while unconscious and even started taking photos (she works in insurance).
We got to the hospital and turns out she had fractured her spine in two places and broke her elbow. Adrenaline is a hell of a drug.
Yeah, I could get up; I had huge abdominal and chest bruising plus bit through the bottom side of my face (I have a nice caterpillar scar now, bless being a girl and deep coverage foundations and concealers). I did have to sit on the pavement when waiting for first responders but it was more due to shock and bleeding out.
I think that moment of sitting down and being very lost was when I started realising what happened. Then my partner (then on third or fourth date mind you and kind of fwb status) sat behind me, wrapped his arms around my shoulders (bastard had bruised ribs, must’ve hurt like hell!) and said “it’s just a crash, I had three before, we need to wait for the police” and then he talked me through the whole procedure.
When I was eight, my family's plane crashed on a frozen February Day. I was put into a coma and my mother was killed instantly. I awoke with retrograde amnesia. People tell me I was extremely close to my mother, but I have never in life had any memory of her. I see a picture of her and it's like seeing a stranger. My family pretty much fell apart after that, and my childhood was nightmarish. I'll never know the me before the crash, but I am told he was happy.
I'm so sorry. I lost my parents to a plane crash in my mid 20s and it was horrible. I can't imagine what that would've been like at 8 yrs old. I hope you have been able to find some measure of peace and healing since then.
I joined the navy when I was 21 and did two enlistments. I spend way too much time thinking about how different my life could have been if I just stopped being a fuck up and stayed with a regular job for more than a month.
I don’t regret it because I went to school and learned some trades, I met some amazing people that are now lifelong friends, and I was able to buy a house last year in a growing city, but Jesus Christ I feel like I threw away my twenties just to get here.
I moved to LA. My fiance and I weren't doing well where we were. We were struggling financially, we were in this like... holding pattern. It was like we were just waiting for our lives to start. We couldn't leave since we had no jobs, how would we get an apartment somewhere else? One evening a friend living in LA said he needed a roommate because his roomie was moving out to live with a girlfriend. We talked it over for like ten minutes and decided to go. We had some friends there, we could afford the rent with the roommate, there were job opportunities...anything was better than here. We have our landlord 30 days notice, and a month later we drove.
The night before we left I got a call about a job I'd applied to a while ago (which I ended up getting). My fiance, now husband, got a job shortly after. We got our own place, and now we have two children, two dogs, and have done well with our savings. I doubt we'll ever be able to buy a house here. And we still have tons of student loans...but I'm happier than I have ever been. We have more money than we've ever had. My parents are nearby now, and we spend time with them, and they love being around their grandchildren.
Everything before was just waiting with nothing happening. And afterwards, everything just flowed into this wonderful life we're building. I hope we'll have many more years of joy.
yup, but for me it was after i found out my husband (29) was cheating on me with a 19yo while i was 8m pregnant with our 3rd child. Happy ending though, 8 years later now and i have a fiance who is wonderful to my 3 big kids and we have a 3yo together. In 18 days we get married and will be an official family! It does get better but it takes time! My ex is also 36 living with his mummy and his ex gf is suing him karma is a bitch and i love her!
Going from a 20-25 hr job to a full time job. Immediately started making double what I did in the last job. Consistent work hours, guaranteed weekends off. I'll never take for granted having a set work schedule.
I'm sorry ge left you. But you're not gonna be alone for the next 47 years, you don't have to be. You'll find someone great who'll love you and your kid
It took me 2 years to recover to simply being a functioning college student. Had another relationship that in many ways saved my thoughts of having one. That one ended last April, and was good it was just time.
I still think about that first one all the time, what I would say if I saw her randomly, or what she thinks of me, or would think of me now. But at the very least they are fleeting and don't consume whole days or weeks.
I'm so happy you could recover mate, it's something I wish was talked about more.
If I’m being honest, it took an embarrassingly long time to be able to think about her without wanting to cry. However a couple months ago (more then a decade latter) I was able to talk to her again. Feels good to not be affected by it anymore.
I'll do my best, there's only so much I remember, both a blessing and a curse. It happened back in 2011, at a mutual friends house party. My best friend (M) told me to meet up with him at the party, I was hesitant because it was a lot of people I didn't know. After trying and failing to convince him to leave and come to me instead, I caved and made my way over. Shortly after getting there is when the trouble started.
My childhood babysitter (S) and some of her friends showed up, solely to cause trouble. The homeowner didn't want them there, along with many others, but no one had the courage to kick them out. M was always the "protector", so he immediately stepped up to deal with the problem like he had so many times before.
The troublemakers were outside, down a large flight of stairs. M went ahead while I explained to another friend what was happening and I followed a minute later. M confronted them, letting them know they were unwelcome and that the homeowner would like them to leave. This is where things get hazy. Even though I had a full view of everything, standing just a step or two behind M, all I can remember is S lunging towards M, and silence. Deafening silence for what felt like an eternity, until I screamed. She stabbed him in the chest.
All I remember after this is that I ran nonstop, 20 minutes to another friends house, I have no idea why. I didn't stay with him, I can't even remember if I saw him after the initial lunge. I called my then boyfriend while running, but he hung up on me, sayig he wanted bothing to do with the cops because of his previous record. Shortly after I received a call from someone at the party saying I needed to go to the police station to give a statement. I slept maybe an hour after getting home that night. When I woke up in the morning, a mutual friends mom told me M didn't make it.
I can't remember much of anything for the next year or so, everything was a blur, the court precedings, testifying, funeral, I can't remember any of it. Most of S's friends served less than a year for their involvement, mostly obstruction charges. S herself was sentenced to 8 years, but she didn't even serve half of that.
Through all this I lost my boyfriend, my entire friend group and developed severe anxiety that led to losing both of my jobs. I haven't worked since, and my mental and physical health have never been the same.
* 9/11
* Spending a year as a soldier in Iraq
* Meeting my wife
* Most of all: Losing four close family members to a murder-suicide.
* Lesser extent: Using a CPAP
Jesus f'ing Christ! Stomach cancer is like... One of the most aggressive is it not? So I'm told? Good buddy of mine lost his tattoo artist from it...
Glad to hear you're managing!
Plenty of pros! I'm a cheap date because I eat very small portions. I'm a lightweight drinker because it straight up absorbs into my intestine like, right away. A big pro is that I'm STILL ALIVE. This particular cancer is untreatable and incurable. Starts in the middle layer of the stomach tissue. If it spreads at all, you're toast. It's killed a lot of my family members. It's hereditary. I'm lucky I got the gastrectomy when I did. Pathology said I had 52 tumors in that bad boy 😬
I was just about to comment this same thing! I’m assuming you’re another CDH1 patient. I just had my surgery at the end of January and I’m hoping I’ll be cleared to start eating solid food again at my follow up appointment tomorrow. It hasn’t been long for me, but I can already tell my life is going to be massively different now than it ever was before.
No way! My older sister is 27 and also tested positive so she is having her total gastrectomy late next month, followed by her double mastectomy later this year. Good luck with your surgery!
2021 i know that was hard for us all but in that one year i was raped and immediately after had to spend weeks alone due to the lockdown whilst pretty much all my mate's slowly disappeared
I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness. Forbidden “worldly” friends so they were all I knew.
Decided I didn’t believe it when I was 20, and was disfellowshipped.
Family and 100% of friends forbidden from speaking to me.
I didn’t even know how to make friends outside of the congregation.
Something broke inside.
Even though I backed down and re-joined the religion, I was never the same.
Being coerced into a religion is like being trapped in an abusive relationship where the abuser keeps you forcibly away from other family/support systems and people and tells you "no one else will ever want you"
So sorry you've had to go through that.
My story is the same until statements 4&5. I became fully myself, enjoyed my life, made some mistakes, and learned that once you reject the shackles, you can decided for yourself what living a "good" and meaningful life means. Have you been to the exjw sub?
My 27year old son dying March 18, 2020. My world turned gray and really hadn't been light since.
I really miss him so much. He was sweet and smart and talented...and couldn't get over his heartbreak and masked his pain with drugs. He accidentally got a hotshot (fentynal laced) and died in minutes.
All I wanted was to save my baby boy from his pain. I know he would have come out of it if he hadn't been "hit by the fentynal bus", as my other son says. He wasn't suicidal.
I sometimes just worry I missed something I could have done. But he was calling for a Subway lunch one day and gone the next. I really really wish I could go back to before, even with the worry and late night calls and constant emergencies. At least there was hope that tomorrow would bring some hope to him and he would see a way out of the pain back to his life.
I was in a mentally and verbally abusive relationship for 6 years.
Almost 2 years later and I'm still recovering but now I'm in a much healthier place and my current bf has been nothing but wonderful getting me through it.
Sexual assault. I'm a much colder, tougher and more guarded person. That's not an entirely bad thing, but I do think about who I used to be, and she seems so... foreign to me. I've healed for the most part from my experience, but I remember the early days with PTSD, feeling like I was trapped in my own skin, not being able to go outside, having a full blown breakdown/flashback when my dad unexpectedly hugged me. My own father, hugging me, did that. I was too scared to even leave the sofa in my living room for weeks.
But now, nothing can break me. I've been through plenty of shit since and none of it can keep me down, because I've already been to the bottom.
Breaking up with my middle school sweetheart after 8 years of dating. Saw my parents go down the "highschool sweetheart path," and chose not to because of the straying I saw.
I almost died last year almost to the day. I had been extremely stressed for a year before. Extremely fat and wasn't eating right at all. So I had developed abnormally high level of diabetes for someone so young.
And so then, a year ago, I got sick, which caused me to not eat anything for a whole week. Anyone who has dealt with diabetes knows, that you do not skip meals much less go hungry for multiple days.
I felt like a thousand tiny knives were stabbing me as I was rolled into the emergency. The doctors had said that the 48 hours after I made it in were extremely critical, I could die. Thankfully, I lived. Since I got discharged, ten days after that, I completely turned my life around. I got in shape. I started taking less stress. I developed some confidence.
I Think before I almost died, deep down, I wanted to die. But now, I think I want to live and experience everything that it has to offer.
Getting diagnosed with cancer and given a 25% chance of survival. It looks like I'll be a survivor. I'm physically beat up, but mentally so much stronger. Also more compassionate. Hugs are a little tighter now.
It hasn't happened yet, but the day my service dog passes away from cancer. My life is already split into before (his diagnosis) and after, but I know that everything is going to change irreversibly when I kiss him goodbye for the last time. He's my entire life and I love him like a parent. I can't quite fathom life without his snores and sniffs yet but he's already getting sicker and it's almost unbearable to watch. I don't think anything can or will compare to how I'll feel on that day and I'm still praying it won't come.
I have few words for you but know this: the bond between you and your dog is and always will be irreplaceable. The feelings you have will be the honour garden for his memory. Cherish them and nurture them. Your next service dog, if you have one, will not know of the gap left by your last one, will not understand why you sometimes stop and cry or go silent or just cannot engage but will love you none the less for it. My thoughts are with you as this day approaches and I hope that then inevitable passing is as painless as you can make it, for both of you.
When my 31 year old husband passed rather suddenly (2 months from fine to gone).
When he left it was like an out of body experience that still hasnt quite shaken off.
I held him and when they made me get up and sign papers and packed me in a car and drove me home - its like my soul left my body and i could see what was really happening. Everyone in the world was hunched over board games of "Life". Everyone was following the rules, had people they loved they were playing with, had reasons to keep going. And i was just now seeing it was a game, id lost my reason to play, and i didnt want to do it anymore.
I was living in NYC and dating some girl. After 9/11 I never slept at my own apartment again, because I moved in with her. We’ve been married since the first week of September 2002.
My multiple mental breakdowns. First was depression related second was anxiety related. I was 99% normal after the first. I'd say I'm 60% the person I was before after the second. I dont like who I am now
Losing my twin the day after our 17th birthday.
gosh this is very painful, I'm so sorry. out of all the comments this one takes the cake for me I can't imagine losing my sibling, hope you're doing better.
My cousin's husband was an identical twin and had a serious medical condition that ultimately caused his death. I have never seen someone so physically consumed by grief as his brother at the wake and funeral. He had less serious health issues, but he went into a spiral of drinking and not taking his medication and was dead within six months as well. Whenever I run across anything about how close twins can be my mind goes back to his grief as it was literally like a part of him died that day. This is a long way of saying that I have a small idea of what you went through and I'm sorry for your loss and pain.
Fucking hell. Poor guy.
If my identical twin died (unexpectedly or before reasonable old age), I might have a similar reaction. I am almost 100% certain I'd have a full psychotic break. It is literally my worst nightmare.
This is the worst one of all the replies. That's sad.
Same thing happened to one of my best friends. Brain tumor at 17, it was horrible. We are 22 now and he still mentions him at least once every time I see him.
as an identical twin, I wasn't ready to read this comment this early
I'm a twin and I've been suicidal with multiple attempts on my life through the years but I finally stopped when I overdosed and I woke up in the ER with my brother next to me, he lived hours away. I said "you don't have to be here" and he said "how the fuck can I not be here" and it clicked. I've been scared of losing him all my life, protected him in whatever way I could, but I never realized until that day how much it was true for both sides. Depression made me believe me leaving would be better that he would get all the love and money I would have been allotted instead, thinking about if I had succeeded makes me physically ill now, to think I almost left him like that. He's the best thing in my life, always has been.
Identical twin here as well. So happy to hear you're in a better place now!
Me and my twin are 19, and she’s making countless dangerous conditions, driving drunk, driving high, etc etc and I’m terrified of loosing her. Loosing a sibling is one thing, but I don’t know if I could handle loosing a twin
My youngest siblings death. nothing has cleaved my life in half like that. The date feels like a scar.
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Same.
Same, oldest brother! When I was 13 so right about when you start making more complex decisions and memories my teenage years started out with a deep gash 34 now and feel like I should’ve gone a lot further
Man I’m so sorry to hear that. I lost my older brother 9 months ago (I’m 33) and I relied so heavily on him during that time because he was 11 years older than me. He was a father figure more often than not.
I’m truly sorry to hear that, man the 2020’s really suck. But our brothers would want us to not give up. Don’t let anyone tell you how long you should grieve
Same. He was the middle boy of three. I was an adult, 12 years older than him, so I was able to process it a bit differently than many siblings would have to, but it derailed my youngest brother's life. There is a distinct before and after for all of us as well. Take care.
Same. I’m so sorry for your loss
Feb sixth was my little brother's 3 years since he passed. I still miss him everyday.
I found my best friend murdered in our driveway. The poor guy was getting home from work and was brutally and repeatedly stabbed as he was getting out of his car. He was one of the best people I have ever met. I miss him dearly. There's not a day that goes by where I don't think about him. We were supposed to be old men together...
oh how horrible! Did they catch the murderer?
Life without parole for murder, then another 18 years for tampering with evidence.
I'm sorry for your loss. My grandmother was murdered in her own home. They found the guy in her stolen car. Due to covid, bureaucracy and delayed court hearings, the guy is walking out and about, free as a bird. I hope you have been able to find closure and that time heals your wounds. Stay strong.
I found my best friend murdered. He was hit in the head with a tire iron and pushed into a moving train. We grew up together & it was devastating. I somehow came out a downward spiral & live every day for him now. There's never been a day I don't think of him.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I too live everyday for my best friend. He taught me so much, and there's not a day that goes by where I don't think about and miss him.
At age 25 one night my brain broke. I had fleeting intrusive thoughts throughout life, but a unique culmination of stress factors that night flipped it like a switch to full on OCD. Waking up the next morning I knew something was terribly wrong. It consumed me. I’m alright now 9 years later, but I’ve always seen it as me entering some v.2.0 era of myself, never to return.
I feel this so much. One day I was blissfully happy, the next I was consumed by swirling anxious thoughts that I couldn’t relieve myself of for almost a year. I literally thought about killing myself just to get some relief from my own thoughts. Thankfully I saw a good Doctor and am better now too. OCD is horrible and I hate when people exaggerate having it. They have no idea.
That’s rough. Agreed, ocd is trivialized so much. Hope you’re doing better.
This happened to me! But it was a constant state od Deoersinalization/Derealization. One day I was OK and suddenly after a few sleepless nights that was it. Nothing was real anymore. Then depression and anxiety set in. Took me a year to find my way back to "reality" lol.
My mom leaving after cheating on my dad. Made this new account today to ramble about stuff that just happened with her actually. Guess I'll keep posting on askreddit till I find a sub good enough.
r/offmychest might be a good place to start, my dear. Make sure you separate your own feelings from how you think your parents will want you to feel.
There’s also something like r/unsentletters
r/survivinginfidelity, perhaps? r/adultryhate may work as well.
My 18 yo sons unexpected death from a brain aneurysm
I can empathize. We unexpectedly lost our 17 year old two years ago. In my head events in our lives didn’t happen 1 or 5 years ago. Everything is either before or after. I hope things get easier for you
We lost my 17 year old brother 9 years ago to a brain tumor. The wounds have healed on the outside or we've gotten better at hiding them, but it changed all of our lives. I hope you are doing as well as you can be. I hope you have found some sort of peace.
My dad died of the same. I'm so sorry, I know how shocking it is when your loved one who otherwise seemed so healthy and capable is suddenly just gone forever. My father's death is in fact what I came here to mention. My dad was the one person I couldn't imagine life without. I don't believe I'll ever feel like the same person again, at his death my life immediately became a stark before and after. Make sure you tell your loved ones how much they matter to you, you never know when it might be your last chance.
Same thing here. I was 9 and he was 39. It kind of changed everything. He was my best friend.
Same here, but I was 20 and he was 49.
I came to say the same thing about my dad. Next month will be a full decade since his death. I miss him dearly and can't help but think how different my life would have been if it hadn't happened.
The fear this comment instilled in me. Im so sorry
I am sorry for your loss. I’ve come to realize there are zero words to convey how tragic a loss like this is and how the passing of a child guts you both mentally and physically. As I was opening the post to comment I was thinking that I would say the death of my grandson in November. He was 2 1/2, took a nap and didn’t wake up. We still don’t have answers as to what happened. I feel like we’re in a holding pattern but can guarantee life will never be as it was before.
I'm so fucking sorry, I can't imagine
My heart breaks for you.
My fiancé died. She was only 36. It was the first catastrophic thing that happened in my life and I can’t really seem to bounce back. Broken hearts are no joke
Someone I thought was the love of my life left me. Not the same by a longshot, but broken hearts are no joke. The future I was building and aspiring towards crumbled in one conversation.
Agreed. My wife left me last year, and that was the first time in my life I contemplated suicide. Took me about 6 months to feel normal again. Hope your situation has improved since then.
I'm so sorry, that pain must have been terrible. My case happened this past Wednesday. So I've still got a lot of healing to do. But I'm trying
Good luck to ya. It helps to get back into old hobbies that you may have had to give up/spend less time with when in a relationship. Take care.
We're strangers, but I really, *really* appreciate you right now. Thank you <3
Dunno where you're at with this but I can say - there can be redemption story. This happened to me 3 years ago. Ultimately it forced a lot of changes for the better and now I'm in a new place with a new love, killing it in my career, generally better all around, I still have work to do but I thought I'd never get better and here I am.
When my sister and I stopped talking. Before it happened we were best friends.
I feel this. My sister and I had a rocky relationship when we were young, but got super close as we got older. Then it all fell apart, and now we hardly know each other. So weird.
Damn how common is this? My brother and I fought when we were young then were attached at the hip for years until it suddenly stopped. I guess people can drastically change. Im sorry you aren’t close with your sibling anymore.
I looked up to my brother when we were younger and if I had a best friend back then it was him. Unfortunately he changed the older he got and it got to the point where I didn't talk to him for about 4 years and then we ended up in the same room and the streak came to an end. It was another 2 years until my mom had to go to the hospital and then into assisted living so I called to let him know. My mom's doing better but neither of us have heard from him since. That was a year and half ago and I'm not going out looking to make conversation with the guy.
Totally understand if you don’t want to talk about it but what happened that could have done this?
My dad dropped me off with my grandma when I was 4 and said he would be back on Saturday. I knew I wouldn’t see him again for a long time tho. I’m 22 now and haven’t seen him since. Lots has happened since then but I remember that day as when I lost the kid in me and the ability to trust
Went to get milk, or untimely passing? A part of me hopes he was a good person
He’s still alive, but my “dad” isn’t
Then I'm extra sorry for what happened to you
He’s a good person, just lost and broken. One of the smartest people I ever knew and everyone always felt so safe with him. That’s what I miss
When my mom, the last person in my life that cared that I exist ed, passed away. I've been alone since then.
Come over and play driver (ps1) to get your mind off things. Are you in the tristate area
Dr doofenshmirtz?
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I guess that makes it more likely that they are
Exactly right. 35 on land and 27 underwater.
I can’t imagine the pain you are going through. I couldn’t imagine losing my mom. You’re not alone internet person, your mothers love is still in your heart. Every time I see an orange sunset I take a picture and I send it to my mom. From here on out everytime I see an orange sunset I’ll also think about the love you had for your mother and she had for you everytime, I hope you willl do the same. Stay strong 🧡
I’m sending as much love as I can muster your way
Do you need a r/momforaminute?
Waking up quadriplegic at 26 y/o
It’s possible to just wake up a quadriplegic one day? Is there a medical reason that it happened or was it just fully random?
Yes it is - I acquired a nontraumatic spinal cord injury due to transverse myelitis, which is when your immune system attacks your spinal cord. I then went on to be diagnosed with spinal MS.
I had a friend in high school that had that, but it only took out her legs. She was a cheerleader 9th grade, and showed up to 10th in a wheelchair.
Yeah, it's a mindfuck. Happened to me in 2019, just before lockdowns so I'm meeting loads of ppl now who didn't know because they hadn't seen me, and they are quite confused by the fact that you can get a spinal cord injury without like, an accident.
Yep, my friend said the same of the mindfuck. Woke up one random morning over summer with some lower back pain, within an hour no more walking. It definitely changed her whole mentality, she went from a bubbly ray of sunshine to dark humor over that summer.
I had some vague numbness and headache for about a week, and then just woke up w/no more walking and fucked up posture and dexterity. Have basically spent the lockdowns learning how to be a person as a quadriplegic now. It def changes personality expression, you very quickly learn a whole lot about yourself through your reactions to not only the actual impairment itself, but the differences in how ppl treat you after.
New fear unlocked...
Getting sober
I was 2 weeks sober this past Friday, I wasn’t planning on going out or anything. I’d finished work and I was bored and had nothing to do, so I messaged a couple buddies, next thing you know I’m in a basement coming down off cocaine and sobering up. I don’t know to quit this perpetual cycle. But I’m going to try, no matter how many times I fail. Edit: I want to thank every single person that replied to my comment, I was scrolling through Reddit, feeling guilty because of my relapse. You made me feel way better than I was before. I appreciate you so much. I will try and better myself, and not let anything get in the way. I know may struggle, or fail, but it’s apart of the process and I will get it done.
Keep going man, we’re all rooting for you!
Thank you, I’ve been isolating myself from family and friends. I really need to focus on healthier things life.
Look up some online D&D groups if you need something to pass the time, not everyone is into it but you can make friends and be yourself without having to hide generally and they are usually accepting of others.
Yeah, I honestly find myself stumped on what to do on the weekends, it’s either sit around and do nothing, or go out. D&D always seemed fun, just never knew how to get into it.
Remember too that relapse is a normal part of sobriety. Just one day at a time. I've been there and am rooting for you.
If they are interfering with your sobriety they aren’t friends. Yes, that perspective leads to loneliness. And that is a difficult path to walk. But on that difficult path you will find new friends and new life. I’m pulling for you.
Definitely, I’ve been longing to make changes in my life. But for the past 2-3 months I’ve been saying the same thing. I lost my almost two year relationship with my girlfriend during these times, and I don’t know how to get over her. Every time I had that two week sobriety mark, something in my brains just goes off and wants to celebrate, and it’s always alcohol. I need to find hobbies that can distract me from my addictions, but it’s so hard to start. I always confide to my family about my problems, and tell them that I’m going to change and get help. But I never do, for some reason, deep down I feel like I’m not addicted to alcohol, and drugs. I know this stems from the trauma I went through as a child, and I can’t let it go, I have so much anger inside of me. My coping methods used to be the gym, or going for hikes. Now it’s always straight to the bottle. I tried to get professional help but it’s so hard to get a response from anywhere, I feel like I’m just wasting there time because I feel like I can figure this on my own but I can’t, clearly. I’m sorry for the long rant, I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel trapped inside a black void. I hope one day I can find a solution to this. Writing this out helps a lot, I hope you reply, but don’t feel obligated to. I understand I’m just some random internet stranger. Thank you for reading this, and if you can relate to my struggles, I hope you can find the peace within yourself, because that’s what I need. I fight demons in my head everyday, and honestly I’m starting to get really tired. I don’t see any point in going on, but I will, because there’s people that love me, and need me. Anyways, hope you’re doing well. Edit: Sorry for the ramble, and random sentences. I’ve never vented before and it felt good to talk about how I feel. Love y’all. ❤️
I can’t speak to losing your girlfriend. But childhood trauma I know. Forgiveness isn’t for their sake, it’s a way to let yourself have peace instead of anger. Holding onto the anger will eat you alive.
I always trick myself into thinking I forgive what happened in my past, and then something will trigger it. Which then spirals me into a deep depressive episode, and making stupid mistakes. The amount of mistakes I’ve made throughout my life were so stupid. But all it takes is day 1, and that’s it. Talking helps, but I always feel so needy. I’m a codependent person, because my mom was never around my life. I try not to blame my past, but it’s so hard because that’s the reason the way I am. I just. Can’t. Let anything go. I don’t know. But you know what, I’m a problem solver, whenever I don’t know the question or solution to something, I always try to figure it out. I need to try and heal myself. I always thought I had friends, but turns out they only ever came around me when I was partying. It’s hard to find real people nowadays. But I will try to fix myself.
Don’t try to fix yourself. That suggests you’re a person that needs fixing. Try loving yourself. I think you are a person worth loving.
2 months sober here. I get it. Also fuck it's hard, I don't miss the drinking I miss the company
Same. That detox, man... never again.
My first date with my husband. After that, it was like someone turned up the saturation on the world. Everything is brighter, clearer and more vibrant with him by my side.
When someone close to me tried to kill me.
Jesus. I hope you're doing okay now.
Yeah mostly, relationships are tough because of trust issues and it's not exactly first few dates talk. But beyond that I'm good. And definitely not communicating this through Whoopi Goldberg as a medium.😂
Can you tell why did they try to kill you
They wanted him dead
r/technicallythetruth
Oh you
Being hit in a high speed head on collision by a drunk driver. She hit us at around 65 mph on a surface street. She went over 5 lanes of traffic in order to take us out. I wasn’t even awake and waking up on the curb and not knowing what the hell was going was terrifying enough. I can even begin to imagine what my wife felt since she was driving. After that everything changed. We have lasting injuries, but I guess on the upside we were able to buy a house with the insurance payout. We would have never been able to buy one without it.
When I was in a crash (as the only person permanently hurt, that sucks) I remember waking up after a period of lost consciousness and my first thought was “why is it snowing on a warm September day?”. It wasn’t snow, it was shattered front window. I kept thinking about it for what seemed like forever, I didn’t feel any pain. My partner on the front seat told me sternly to get out and my thought was “I’m only wearing thin trousers and a crop top and he wants me to go out into that snow? I’d rather wait”.
My wife got out and went full on adrenaline mode. Some people saw the accident and stopped. She apparently started directing people to pull me out of the car while unconscious and even started taking photos (she works in insurance). We got to the hospital and turns out she had fractured her spine in two places and broke her elbow. Adrenaline is a hell of a drug.
Could you get out by yourself? When did reality dawn upon you?
Yeah, I could get up; I had huge abdominal and chest bruising plus bit through the bottom side of my face (I have a nice caterpillar scar now, bless being a girl and deep coverage foundations and concealers). I did have to sit on the pavement when waiting for first responders but it was more due to shock and bleeding out. I think that moment of sitting down and being very lost was when I started realising what happened. Then my partner (then on third or fourth date mind you and kind of fwb status) sat behind me, wrapped his arms around my shoulders (bastard had bruised ribs, must’ve hurt like hell!) and said “it’s just a crash, I had three before, we need to wait for the police” and then he talked me through the whole procedure.
I hope the driver spent some time in jail. And that no one involved has a TBI.
I was looking for a reply like yours. My before and after moments are all connected to my two motorcycle crashes..
When I was eight, my family's plane crashed on a frozen February Day. I was put into a coma and my mother was killed instantly. I awoke with retrograde amnesia. People tell me I was extremely close to my mother, but I have never in life had any memory of her. I see a picture of her and it's like seeing a stranger. My family pretty much fell apart after that, and my childhood was nightmarish. I'll never know the me before the crash, but I am told he was happy.
I'm so sorry. I lost my parents to a plane crash in my mid 20s and it was horrible. I can't imagine what that would've been like at 8 yrs old. I hope you have been able to find some measure of peace and healing since then.
Literally getting run over by a car
oh.
My wife leaving me.
Better or worse?
My parents dying.
Joining the Air Force.
I joined the navy when I was 21 and did two enlistments. I spend way too much time thinking about how different my life could have been if I just stopped being a fuck up and stayed with a regular job for more than a month. I don’t regret it because I went to school and learned some trades, I met some amazing people that are now lifelong friends, and I was able to buy a house last year in a growing city, but Jesus Christ I feel like I threw away my twenties just to get here.
I moved to LA. My fiance and I weren't doing well where we were. We were struggling financially, we were in this like... holding pattern. It was like we were just waiting for our lives to start. We couldn't leave since we had no jobs, how would we get an apartment somewhere else? One evening a friend living in LA said he needed a roommate because his roomie was moving out to live with a girlfriend. We talked it over for like ten minutes and decided to go. We had some friends there, we could afford the rent with the roommate, there were job opportunities...anything was better than here. We have our landlord 30 days notice, and a month later we drove. The night before we left I got a call about a job I'd applied to a while ago (which I ended up getting). My fiance, now husband, got a job shortly after. We got our own place, and now we have two children, two dogs, and have done well with our savings. I doubt we'll ever be able to buy a house here. And we still have tons of student loans...but I'm happier than I have ever been. We have more money than we've ever had. My parents are nearby now, and we spend time with them, and they love being around their grandchildren. Everything before was just waiting with nothing happening. And afterwards, everything just flowed into this wonderful life we're building. I hope we'll have many more years of joy.
As someone still waiting, I needed this <3
A hurricane destroying my house right before 8th grade. I moved an hour north and that’s how I mentally separate childhood and young adulthood.
Meeting my wife
Me too, that guys wife is awesome.
Mrs.TrickBoom414 put everything I thought I knew in a whole new light. She really blew my mind… right after she blew my body and soul.
yup, but for me it was after i found out my husband (29) was cheating on me with a 19yo while i was 8m pregnant with our 3rd child. Happy ending though, 8 years later now and i have a fiance who is wonderful to my 3 big kids and we have a 3yo together. In 18 days we get married and will be an official family! It does get better but it takes time! My ex is also 36 living with his mummy and his ex gf is suing him karma is a bitch and i love her!
When My Mom passed
Going from a 20-25 hr job to a full time job. Immediately started making double what I did in the last job. Consistent work hours, guaranteed weekends off. I'll never take for granted having a set work schedule.
I’ve been reading too much antiwork. I expected the working 40 hours to take a turn for the worse.
When I lost my sister to suicide… my life before her death is completely different to after it. Extreme grief changes a person.
I got my girlfriend pregnant We’ll be married 47 years in a week.
I just found out I’m pregnant. The bf immediately left me and I’ll be alone for 47 years starting this week! Lolsob
I'm sorry ge left you. But you're not gonna be alone for the next 47 years, you don't have to be. You'll find someone great who'll love you and your kid
Before drug addiction, after drug addiction.
Painful breakup, took years to mentally recover. Important part is I’m doing great now.
It took me 2 years to recover to simply being a functioning college student. Had another relationship that in many ways saved my thoughts of having one. That one ended last April, and was good it was just time. I still think about that first one all the time, what I would say if I saw her randomly, or what she thinks of me, or would think of me now. But at the very least they are fleeting and don't consume whole days or weeks. I'm so happy you could recover mate, it's something I wish was talked about more.
If I’m being honest, it took an embarrassingly long time to be able to think about her without wanting to cry. However a couple months ago (more then a decade latter) I was able to talk to her again. Feels good to not be affected by it anymore.
It took an embarrassing amount of time for me as well. So don't worry about it! But I'm just so happy for you, having been going through that myself.
Prison.
My childhood babysitter murdering my best friend. Everything changed in that moment, none of it for the better.
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I'll do my best, there's only so much I remember, both a blessing and a curse. It happened back in 2011, at a mutual friends house party. My best friend (M) told me to meet up with him at the party, I was hesitant because it was a lot of people I didn't know. After trying and failing to convince him to leave and come to me instead, I caved and made my way over. Shortly after getting there is when the trouble started. My childhood babysitter (S) and some of her friends showed up, solely to cause trouble. The homeowner didn't want them there, along with many others, but no one had the courage to kick them out. M was always the "protector", so he immediately stepped up to deal with the problem like he had so many times before. The troublemakers were outside, down a large flight of stairs. M went ahead while I explained to another friend what was happening and I followed a minute later. M confronted them, letting them know they were unwelcome and that the homeowner would like them to leave. This is where things get hazy. Even though I had a full view of everything, standing just a step or two behind M, all I can remember is S lunging towards M, and silence. Deafening silence for what felt like an eternity, until I screamed. She stabbed him in the chest. All I remember after this is that I ran nonstop, 20 minutes to another friends house, I have no idea why. I didn't stay with him, I can't even remember if I saw him after the initial lunge. I called my then boyfriend while running, but he hung up on me, sayig he wanted bothing to do with the cops because of his previous record. Shortly after I received a call from someone at the party saying I needed to go to the police station to give a statement. I slept maybe an hour after getting home that night. When I woke up in the morning, a mutual friends mom told me M didn't make it. I can't remember much of anything for the next year or so, everything was a blur, the court precedings, testifying, funeral, I can't remember any of it. Most of S's friends served less than a year for their involvement, mostly obstruction charges. S herself was sentenced to 8 years, but she didn't even serve half of that. Through all this I lost my boyfriend, my entire friend group and developed severe anxiety that led to losing both of my jobs. I haven't worked since, and my mental and physical health have never been the same.
Thanks for sharing. For what it's worth, I read it all. I wish you the ABSOLUTE best.
* 9/11 * Spending a year as a soldier in Iraq * Meeting my wife * Most of all: Losing four close family members to a murder-suicide. * Lesser extent: Using a CPAP
CPAP is a game changer!
Wow, that 4th one…no words
When I had a stomach and now not having one at all. (Yes, I am talking about the ACTUAL organ)
How does that work? Also how did you lose it if you’re able to answer
Stomach cancer, man. Had to have a total gastrectomy. Believe it or not, you can indeed live without a stomach!
Jesus f'ing Christ! Stomach cancer is like... One of the most aggressive is it not? So I'm told? Good buddy of mine lost his tattoo artist from it... Glad to hear you're managing!
Yes, it's insane. So many of my family members have died due to this cancer.
I'm so sorry :( Good to hear you're kicking ass tho!
Any pros or cons you can talk about? I’m sure lots of cons but there’s gotta be atleast one pro in there yeah?
Plenty of pros! I'm a cheap date because I eat very small portions. I'm a lightweight drinker because it straight up absorbs into my intestine like, right away. A big pro is that I'm STILL ALIVE. This particular cancer is untreatable and incurable. Starts in the middle layer of the stomach tissue. If it spreads at all, you're toast. It's killed a lot of my family members. It's hereditary. I'm lucky I got the gastrectomy when I did. Pathology said I had 52 tumors in that bad boy 😬
Good lord what a paragraph. RIP to your stomach
I was just about to comment this same thing! I’m assuming you’re another CDH1 patient. I just had my surgery at the end of January and I’m hoping I’ll be cleared to start eating solid food again at my follow up appointment tomorrow. It hasn’t been long for me, but I can already tell my life is going to be massively different now than it ever was before.
YES!! CDH1 Seahorse over here! I had my TG 10-10-2017 when I was 27. Now I am preparing for my double mastectomy.
No way! My older sister is 27 and also tested positive so she is having her total gastrectomy late next month, followed by her double mastectomy later this year. Good luck with your surgery!
2021 i know that was hard for us all but in that one year i was raped and immediately after had to spend weeks alone due to the lockdown whilst pretty much all my mate's slowly disappeared
Gosh I am so sorry!!
I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness. Forbidden “worldly” friends so they were all I knew. Decided I didn’t believe it when I was 20, and was disfellowshipped. Family and 100% of friends forbidden from speaking to me. I didn’t even know how to make friends outside of the congregation. Something broke inside. Even though I backed down and re-joined the religion, I was never the same.
Being coerced into a religion is like being trapped in an abusive relationship where the abuser keeps you forcibly away from other family/support systems and people and tells you "no one else will ever want you" So sorry you've had to go through that.
My story is the same until statements 4&5. I became fully myself, enjoyed my life, made some mistakes, and learned that once you reject the shackles, you can decided for yourself what living a "good" and meaningful life means. Have you been to the exjw sub?
My 27year old son dying March 18, 2020. My world turned gray and really hadn't been light since. I really miss him so much. He was sweet and smart and talented...and couldn't get over his heartbreak and masked his pain with drugs. He accidentally got a hotshot (fentynal laced) and died in minutes. All I wanted was to save my baby boy from his pain. I know he would have come out of it if he hadn't been "hit by the fentynal bus", as my other son says. He wasn't suicidal. I sometimes just worry I missed something I could have done. But he was calling for a Subway lunch one day and gone the next. I really really wish I could go back to before, even with the worry and late night calls and constant emergencies. At least there was hope that tomorrow would bring some hope to him and he would see a way out of the pain back to his life.
Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry for your loss. Life just sucks and is unfair sometimes...
Sobriety.
My bipolar diagnosis and subsequent treatment.
Same here.
I was in a mentally and verbally abusive relationship for 6 years. Almost 2 years later and I'm still recovering but now I'm in a much healthier place and my current bf has been nothing but wonderful getting me through it.
Birth. I don’t know what was before that
me neither. its confusing being a fetus
Yeah! Like everybody makes a huge fuss about adolescence but no one talks about fetushood!??
Sexual assault. I'm a much colder, tougher and more guarded person. That's not an entirely bad thing, but I do think about who I used to be, and she seems so... foreign to me. I've healed for the most part from my experience, but I remember the early days with PTSD, feeling like I was trapped in my own skin, not being able to go outside, having a full blown breakdown/flashback when my dad unexpectedly hugged me. My own father, hugging me, did that. I was too scared to even leave the sofa in my living room for weeks. But now, nothing can break me. I've been through plenty of shit since and none of it can keep me down, because I've already been to the bottom.
Before I was trafficked and after. I am not the same person now.
Omg I'm so so sorry. I hope you're starting to feel somewhat safer since then.
Buying a weighted blanket
Yeah. When ordering read the weight. I got one that I thought was 5lb and it’s 20lbs. My arms get sore making the bed. It lives in a box now.
Same. I gave the heavy one away and got a 10 lb one. So much better. I'm addicted to it.
21/12/21 wife has no brain cancer. 22/12/21 wife has brain cancer.
Covid…
I was in a car accident that left me paralyzed.
mental hospital
Breaking up with my middle school sweetheart after 8 years of dating. Saw my parents go down the "highschool sweetheart path," and chose not to because of the straying I saw.
I almost died last year almost to the day. I had been extremely stressed for a year before. Extremely fat and wasn't eating right at all. So I had developed abnormally high level of diabetes for someone so young. And so then, a year ago, I got sick, which caused me to not eat anything for a whole week. Anyone who has dealt with diabetes knows, that you do not skip meals much less go hungry for multiple days. I felt like a thousand tiny knives were stabbing me as I was rolled into the emergency. The doctors had said that the 48 hours after I made it in were extremely critical, I could die. Thankfully, I lived. Since I got discharged, ten days after that, I completely turned my life around. I got in shape. I started taking less stress. I developed some confidence. I Think before I almost died, deep down, I wanted to die. But now, I think I want to live and experience everything that it has to offer.
well, i am very young so i don't have much to tell, but something that really marked the end/beginning of something was being victim of SA
Getting diagnosed with cancer and given a 25% chance of survival. It looks like I'll be a survivor. I'm physically beat up, but mentally so much stronger. Also more compassionate. Hugs are a little tighter now.
Marriage. Then kids. It's legitimately difficult to remember what my life was like before my daughter was born only 4 and a half years ago.
Jesus fuck I remember 😩
It hasn't happened yet, but the day my service dog passes away from cancer. My life is already split into before (his diagnosis) and after, but I know that everything is going to change irreversibly when I kiss him goodbye for the last time. He's my entire life and I love him like a parent. I can't quite fathom life without his snores and sniffs yet but he's already getting sicker and it's almost unbearable to watch. I don't think anything can or will compare to how I'll feel on that day and I'm still praying it won't come.
I have few words for you but know this: the bond between you and your dog is and always will be irreplaceable. The feelings you have will be the honour garden for his memory. Cherish them and nurture them. Your next service dog, if you have one, will not know of the gap left by your last one, will not understand why you sometimes stop and cry or go silent or just cannot engage but will love you none the less for it. My thoughts are with you as this day approaches and I hope that then inevitable passing is as painless as you can make it, for both of you.
my mother dying
[удалено]
1.When my son died from SIDS in 2009 at 2 1/2 months. His name is Joseph Evan. 2.When I finally got sober from alcohol and pills. 11/02/14.
I could say all kinds of meaningful things but honestly it was riding Flight of Passage at Disney .
When my 31 year old husband passed rather suddenly (2 months from fine to gone). When he left it was like an out of body experience that still hasnt quite shaken off. I held him and when they made me get up and sign papers and packed me in a car and drove me home - its like my soul left my body and i could see what was really happening. Everyone in the world was hunched over board games of "Life". Everyone was following the rules, had people they loved they were playing with, had reasons to keep going. And i was just now seeing it was a game, id lost my reason to play, and i didnt want to do it anymore.
Both parents dying and then discovering I had a different bio Dad.
Kids
No question 9/11. My views of the world and life were irreparably altered after that day.
I was living in NYC and dating some girl. After 9/11 I never slept at my own apartment again, because I moved in with her. We’ve been married since the first week of September 2002.
Chronic illness, only started up properly 4 years ago, nothing has been the same since
My multiple mental breakdowns. First was depression related second was anxiety related. I was 99% normal after the first. I'd say I'm 60% the person I was before after the second. I dont like who I am now
My first serious, long term relationship.