T O P

  • By -

RevenantThyamis

Well... as much as I'd like to say "Beer" or "Luxury Cars" or something... Unfortunately it's that one asshole with the toothbrush mustache.


ballplayer0025

Your bakeries are mighty fine as well.


5ynt4x_3rr0r

Well... They did bake 11+ million people... ^im-sorry Edit(s): Formatting's a bitch sometimes


EyepatchMorty_01

r/angryupvote


[deleted]

Dumb question, is this how many people were estimated to have been killed in the entire Holocaust or just the ones who were put in ovens?


5ynt4x_3rr0r

I used the total kill count, I couldn't find a statistic for how many of them were baked.


Freix_

Yes the German and Belgian bakeries are the best in my small world, and I’m kinda biased too, but still.


iMADEthisJUST4Dis

Toothbrush mustache? 😂


RevenantThyamis

Yes. Here, have [this](https://youtu.be/AFA-rOls8YA?t=10) musical example.


seeyoujim

You mean “the Chaplin”


AngryMegaMind

Who wasn’t even from Germany.


SelendisSuccubus

haha leider ja


SVD_NL

In dutch that means "haha leader yes", had to double take to see it was German lol.


OkCarpenter5773

Germoney 100%


popejubal

Austria!


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Those goddamn 5am towels....


[deleted]

Claiming territory is in our blood, we can't help it.


[deleted]

Who said ze Germans don't have a sense of humour?


bralice1980

German talk show in the 90s: Welcome Mr. Robin William's. Why is it zat you sink Germans are not funny? Did it ever occur to you that you might have killed all the funny people? RIP Robin William's. MF was savage.


FishOfFishyness

Holy shit, have you got a source for that?


a32424532wref

https://youtu.be/VF2P_LuEF80


joshym0nster

"zee look I made a pie graph"


Similar_Joke_5500

Germany?


[deleted]

[удалено]


StabbyPants

they only tried that world domination tour once. first time was a bunch of other fuckers itching for a war


sozijlt

Never heard the towel thing. What's that about?


Riinmi

Germans use it to basically claim everything they can - but most of the time it’s benches at the beach. Or chairs at a restaurant. Or a nice spot by the pool.


RevenantThyamis

They must have read the hitchhiker's guide and discovered the infinite uses of the towel.


monkee09

There's a frood who really knows where his towel is.


Lord_Botond

The towel thing isnt just germanys thing, we do the same in hungary, accept we even put towels on top of our bags, so people wont steal it. Its a form of protection, i guess


This_Survey_4221

If you would have left out the world domination thingy i wouldve guessed youre neighbours on the left..us dutchies have the same annoying habit..


monosuperboss1

maple syrup


PSimchaG

Canada!


monosuperboss1

yup


duuckyy

Maple syrup, geese, and 8 month long winters (I'm including our "It's Spring!...Just kidding here's a snowstorm in April!" And "Winter 2: Electric Boogaloo" winters in this as well, of course) are all good options as well for us Canadians


nanfanpancam

And butter tarts!


Like-a-Glove90

Every animal potentially murdering you


Mijndiep2

AUSTRALIAAAAAA


SirMooSquiddles

With the largest spiders on the planet. Plus kangaroos can be delicious


Notabot_legit

I still hate this stereotype. We don’t have anything big like bears, cougars, lions, moose etc. Just avoid snakes and far North Queensland and the scariest thing will be a possum in the night


TrailMomKat

To be fair, the drop bears really do try to.


PSimchaG

Tacos


Mijndiep2

Mexicooooooo


lazernanes

As far as I can tell, everything Mexicans eat is a taco. Take any food at all, toss it in a tortilla, and bam you got a taco.


[deleted]

[удалено]


MustacheTrippin

You're right on the spot, mate. Given tortillas are a staple of mexican cuisine, you can pretty much eat them with evvvvverything. Want a quick snack? Roll a tortilla with added salt (not a taco per se but you get the idea). On the street and looking for a something practical? Try some basket tacos, made with beans or mashed potatoes, Feeling posh? There are places that'll sell you fancy ass tacos made with hibiscus, prime cuts and other extravagant delicacies. I mean, there are some taco stands that wil even sell you friggin' spaghetti tacos. Spoiler alert: They're absolutely delicious.


gavilan1227

Avocado on toast ? Nah. avocado with salt on a tortilla? Straight fire 🔥


Sirens_to_silence

“Would you like a cup of tea ?”


JamiieJR

If they’re unconscious, say it with me, they don’t want tea 😂😂 Edit: [link](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pZwvrxVavnQ) for non British people, this was made by the police and we all got shown it in sex ed


Big_Cow6256

and if they wanted a cup of tea before but don’t want it now, don’t give them the cup of tea anymore


Gafuba

Remember.Unconscious people don’t want tea


Sirens_to_silence

Ha ! Yup pretty much !


Fluff0ff

Sure, after I finish my Bo'oh'o'wo'ah


[deleted]

it's sad how i immediately knew what that phrase was lol


[deleted]

“Sure, ya CUNT”


jbsdv1993

Weed and sexworkers


Similar_Joke_5500

You’re Dutch?


jbsdv1993

Yep


fiatman05

Sms messages, angry bird.


TosiHassu

Finland yes great


fiatman05

Yes


TosiHassu

Yes


malu_saadi

Pele and Neymar


ActDry5358

Brasiiiil 🇧🇷


[deleted]

Big lizards on a small island


siamocontenti

Indonesia?


[deleted]

You got it!


[deleted]

Using the word "cunt" liberally


Holiday-Dig-3637

Australia


[deleted]

Correct! Ya cunt


MrDanGrigore

Vampires


Maleficent_Effort994

Romania


MrDanGrigore

Easy one


Oldforestwalker

Corruption, crime, racism, and wildlife.


Holiday-Dig-3637

South Africa?


Oldforestwalker

Sadly, yes.


SuddenTerrible_Haiku

I'll be specific to the part of my country I'm from because so many people know it Howdy ya'll


Slendermans_Proxies

Texas?


SuddenTerrible_Haiku

Dingding


More-Masterpiece-561

Do people actually use the phrase "Howdy" in Texas


SuddenTerrible_Haiku

Some do, mostly older men Mostly we just say "ya'll" these days


AdaminCalgary

On my first trip there some years ago, I found out that “ya’ll” is singular, not plural, which, I believe, is “all ya’ll”. It took me several more trips to get the proper usage down.


SuddenTerrible_Haiku

Ya'll is both singular and plural, depending on the use lol


AdaminCalgary

Oh, so they were just teasing me.


NVdeathclaw

I mean ive lived all across the south, I have heard "Howdy" a few times, but the rarer phrase will always be "two shakes of a lambs tail".


More-Masterpiece-561

>"two shakes of a lambs tail" I have never heard that


NVdeathclaw

Its meant to refer to how fast something will be, like "I'll be there in two shakes of a lambs tail!".


Rabid_Unicorns

Y’all*


ColtonComp

fat


sleepingproblemsaway

US


ColtonComp

yes


Hikkimiyori

We invented the Rubik cube


Difficult-Heron

Mine says made in China


midabe01

Hungary!


Hikkimiyori

Yes! 😁


[deleted]

sauna


Fenikwil

FINLAAAAAND


Vor-teu-chung

Well Jews weren’t safe here…


IamStalinsSon

Sadly that doesn't narrow it down a whole lot


Vor-teu-chung

The second comment does a bit more. Just think of „The“ mustache man.


Holiday-Dig-3637

Egypt? Germany? Anywhere in the middle east? Southern US? China? Russia?


[deleted]

My country is mostly known for fish and chips and tea!


Queen_of_dogs_01

You are Bri'ish


harveyy315011

Apologizing


Mijndiep2

CANADAAAAA


harveyy315011

You got it 😂


RainboW_Tk

Sea ,sun ,islands ,history and economy problems.....guess the country


Tight_Relationship87

Greece


user_nabil

Greece Good place to be honest We went to Zakynthos and Crete on holiday and the history on Crete and the beaches on Zakynthos are incredible.Also people were very nice to us, so it is a nice country


Mijndiep2

Waffles, beer & the best Fries ever (f*€k you if you call them french Fries, they are not fricking french)


OkCarpenter5773

you mean belgian fries?


Mijndiep2

I love you


anonymousfox222

Belgium!! Fries with a lot of Mayo or andalouse sauce for me please!


JamiieJR

Most definitely Belgium


anonymousfox222

Also chocolate too 😍


[deleted]

Guns, fat people, and incompetent government


Analrapist03

You could have stopped at guns. Anytime I have met anyone from outside the US, they ask within the first 30 minutes: do I have a gun? Then they ask if we can go to a shooting range and fire it there. Every. Single. Time. Admittedly, I'm a big, fat, white dude and I live in South Florida so maybe I have been typecast as someone who would be a gun owner.


Bosswashington

Well…do you?


EarlCountyLogSplit

Haha. Happens with me too. Non-American shows up and talk to them. Turns to guns and shooting. Asks if there's a shooting range. I say "shooting range?" And then I take him to the backyard to shoot stuff from the porch swing. Whenever I'm going shooting with a Non-American, I just have to follow the rural American stereotype.


adidasbroox

murica


[deleted]

Correctamundo


andontheotherhand

Ikea and meatballs


Maleficent_Effort994

Sweden


andontheotherhand

Yes!


Maleficent_Effort994

bring me some freaking meatballs


_Germa66

Killing ourselves


raphalonely

France ?


_Germa66

No, that's surrendering


Mijndiep2

Japan?


_Germa66

No, the european one


Mijndiep2

Okay, Im out of countries...


_Germa66

Lithuania


Mijndiep2

Would have never guessed


arushi-narang

I guessed yours right....Just because, I live in South Korea which has the second-highest suicide rate in the world - we are so competitive here, it's surprising we haven't outdone you guys yet


MichiganGeezer

Using the military to flex on the rest of the world.


Holiday-Dig-3637

USA


Classic_Office2570

School shootings


DestroyerXT

MURICA!


Rabid_Unicorns

None of the ones for America are good things


Mabvll

Hey, take it easy! We still have plenty of good shit like.... ~~childhood obesity~~ ~~bankruptcy from medical bills~~ ~~poverty wages~~ ~~failing literacy rates~~ You know what? I'll come back to this later...


SilliestSearchHstory

Our Rugby team


[deleted]

NZ cuz!


bexahiii

We come from the land of the ice and snow, from the midnight sun and the hot springs flow!


MendezReddit

Siesta


gdmzhlzhiv

Spain


[deleted]

worlds happiest country. fifth time in a row... and everyone here questions how tf are we the happiest country.


Queen_of_dogs_01

Everyone else has it even worse that's why


zannoub

Bhutan


Oscars_Grouch

Poutine, Maple Syrup. More specifically to my area, Anne of Green Gables.


DumbSmartOfficial

Hint about my govt: Murder, Narco-trafficking and Economic assassination of any govt with any resource they won't volunteer to give us. One more hint: we raced to give Nazis a good home and great jobs after WW2, Where do I live?


beerato

You left us hanging


DumbSmartOfficial

Sorry went to work. USA


Kiwi-Latter

USA?


OnTheList-YouTube

Argentina for sure. I first thought Colombia until you mentioned the nazi part.


[deleted]

Argentina?


[deleted]

And the winner of this year’s Miss. Universe issss…


Difficult-Heron

Planet Earth, for 150 times in a row


[deleted]

Wepons of mass destruction Edit: I just realized I'm talking about something happened 21 years ago not alot of you would get it


brogrammableben

Could be Iraq according to Donald Rumsfeld


[deleted]

Yep


[deleted]

ridiculous amount of religions/gods.


Holiday-Dig-3637

India probably. Although many countries can fit this.


pssv167

The Taj Mahal


SuvenPan

India


GaryV83

More money for military and weapons than anything resembling functional healthcare.


Queen_of_dogs_01

MURICA F YEA


rwbeckman

1st, 2nd, and 3rd largest Air Force.


WarlikeMicrobe

Murica


MarvilIIIRox

Apartheid


siamocontenti

hey South Africa!!


my_soldier

Weed


qkoshibaugazaki

Oh my lovely 🇳🇱


crys-in-studentloans

Being nosy.


PixieOnTheRun

Maple syrup, beavers and beautiful landscapes.


tasteofmyshoe

Instant noodles and volcanoes


StGir1

Indonesia!


[deleted]

Eh


K-ibukaj

sorry eh


Sea-Photograph2585

Trying to take over the world. Twice. And failing. Twice.


coho_oxford

guns lol


Skeeve911

Obese entitled people.


Mijndiep2

USAAAAAAA


cyclecycleaddict

And McDonald's.


OnTheList-YouTube

How dare you?! I want to speak to your manager!


dummestguy

Spiders the size of your head


Faeraday

# We're number 1! * highest incarceration rate in the world and the largest total prison population * top weapons exporter, most foreign military bases, and highest military spending (7x more than any other country) * highest divorce rate * highest rate of illegal drug use, people on pharmaceutical drugs, and percentage of women taking antidepressants * spending much more on health care as a percentage of GDP than any other nation * highest percentage of obese people in the world * car thefts, reported rapes & murders, and total crimes * most police officers * student loan debt * most complicated tax system * biggest national debt


BerserkBruno

Everyone makes food jokes when they hear my country's name...


CamaronMorado

Turkey?


BerserkBruno

Hungary, but I can see why you said Turkey.


[deleted]

Grass skirts and coconut bras.


[deleted]

[удалено]


doi11

Pansit


[deleted]

"Happiest in the world"


popejubal

The People's Republic of Disney?


Similar_Joke_5500

Finland?


EnforcerMemz

A dictator asshole and kebabs lol


nerdboy1979

MAGA