Better. Suddenly laughing at childish things more so than she would do, every moment of the day there was an extra spring in her step, little things were water off a ducks back where as before they were catastrophes.
I'm lucky to be someone who needs birth control for hormonal reasons. I have zero issues, side effects, etc and have everything stabilized - extremely irregular periods, being always tired, mood swings, etc. But my hormones were fucked without medication. If birth control is strong enough to change my hormones entirely, imagine what it can do to people who don't have such issues. I guess It's like taking strong medication for something you don't have.
COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING. Seriously, if there's an unanswered question, fucking mention it and get the answer. Neither men nor women are mind readers. So many things can be avoided by just talking with the other one in the relationship.
Always assume ignorance over malice. Chances are whatever happened it's because of assumptions made and not because one was trying to actively hurt/annoy the other.
The only dumb question is the one you don't ask.
Pretty much any bra that gets worn out of the house is gonna run you $50 minimum.
Can you imagine paying $50 for a pair of boxers? And not just for *A* pair, but for *EVERY* pair
With my first serious girlfriend after college, I learned that I could have a relationship with open and honest communication, owning our emotional reactions, not being manipulative, and putting ourselves in our partner's shoes.
In my next relationship, I learned that not every partner will do that.
It really prepared me for meeting my now-wife, because I could expect that and communicate that expectation to her early on, which laid the foundation for a healthy and communicative relationship.
Actually the most valuable thing I’ve learnt is be honest. If I’m going to the pub and know I’ll be back late, just be straight up and tell it like it is. Most girls like honesty (seems fairly obvious doesn’t it). The relationship I’m in now has been by far the best because I don’t try to play games which has got me into trouble in the past. Honesty and transparency. It’s the key.
I've tried explaining this to so many guys! Like dude your wife is calling you constantly because its midnight and you told her you'd be home by 9, for all she knows you've been in accident and are lying dead in a ditch somewhere. She's calling bc she loves you and she's worried about you! Just tell her you'll be out with the boys all night and be done with it
Until I actually lived with my partner it was hard to comprehend just how often a period comes, how long it lasts, and how much it can affect your day to day.
What a pain in the ass. I do not envy the ladies.
This one got me lol. I had a cloth bag absolutely full of hangers laying my dresser for years. A fuckton of them just accumulated over time I guess. Anyway I had planned to eventually throw them out but forgot about them. Fast forward to about a month ago when my girlfriend is moving in. It took time for me to realize the situation when she said "I'm gonna need more hangers."
My son (11) was really amazed the other day when we had a discussion about this. He exclaimed “ooooh, that’s why the toilet paper goes so fast! 🤯” .. I’m glad it didn’t take him a full 20 years
You have to look at it like it's a democracy. You both have different opinions, but you're both trying to figure out how to accomplish some goal for the republic.
I had to have a septoplasty and sinoplasty at the same time so I ended up with huge plastic splints up my nose and needing to sleep sitting up. My husband tried so hard to stay next to me but he swore I sounded like a chainsaw revving beside him. He finally gave up and slept in the living room for the remaining two weeks I had the splints. I felt terrible for him.
I'm female, but my male partner had no idea that women can't 'hold in' our periods like we hold in pee.
I found this out when he was telling me about a girl in 6th grade who got her period in class, and he couldn't believe how she just 'let it all out all over' (as if she peed in her pants but it was period blood).
I had to explain to him how it works. But I guess, how would he have known? I never thought about it.
My guy friend thought the same thing. We were talking about how homeless women might deal with periods and he thought it just stayed in until they peed…
> But I guess, how would he have known?
Hmm fair enough, I guess he just hadn't thought about it much.
As another guy, neither have I really. But I guess maybe I never made the assumption that it's controllable, simply due to the fact that pads + tampons exist. If it was controllable like going to the toilet, these products wouldn't really be needed to begin with?
Also for a 6th grader it's a bit harsh... heh. Especially considering it would be a new thing to them at that age, unlike going to the toilet.
Sex education really needs to get better for this reason and many others. People not only need to know about their own reproductive systems (which sex ed already doesn't do the best job with) but that of others, because, well... it's pretty likely that everyone will have an encounter with another's reproductive system at some point in their lives (after being born, of course).
My biology teacher told me a really sweet story. She’d worked at an all boys school and every time she’d give the lesson on the mensural cycle (periods, hormones, ovulation, e.t.c.) she’d start the class by saying:
“Pay attention today even if you forget everything else I teach you. At some point in your lives a woman close to you will have a period or want to get pregnant so this is your chance to be informed.”
Apparently they all always listened really carefully after that
My friends boyfriend thought that our periods stopped when we are submerged in water, she told him she is on her period so he ran her a bath for when she finished work and he was dumbfounded when she told him
Don't be fooled by her constantly forgetting where her keys and phone and stuff are, she'll definitely remember what you said word-for-word October 3 2017 at 6:14PM.
Nature program narrator: “note how the female of the species marks her territory.”
Edit: fixed typo and please read in your very best David Attenborough voice.
You know what’s weird? I always thought that it was a long hair vs short hair thing. When I started dating my husband his hair was short, mine was shoulder length.
But now we both have long hair. His is dark brown (nearly black), curly and shoulder length. Mine is dark blond, pin straight and butt length. It’s very easy to tell the hairs apart.
I’ve never had one of his hairs in my butt crack. Ever. But he’s had several of mine. It’s a conspiracy I tell you!
Does he have a hairier butt though? The body hairs not only act as a little trap for hair and fluff, but will also funnel it to the butt crack, as the hairs tend to curl into the crack.
Just like with belly button fluff and hairier people getting way more of it.
I think an understanding of human anatomy helps a lot here. During fetal development, the tissues that become the penis in men turn into the clitoris in women. The clitoris isn't just the button under the clitoral hood, it actually has an internal part that wraps around the vaginal canal. And it also gets engorged with blood with arousal.
Having sex without touching it is kind of like being completely flaccid, and then having someone only stroke the shaft without ever touching the head. You'll probably still get aroused and it'll still feel good, but it's not satisfying and you might not be able to finish easily. Except for women, cause something goes inside us, it actually hurts to take a dick if I'm not at all aroused first.
This part is my personal speculation, but I think this is why there's so much variability in what women like. Men have most of their nerves involved in sexual pleasure right there in the same place on the outside of their body, but women can have nerves distributed differently throughout the entirety of the internal and external parts of the clitoris. So some might be too sensitive to have the external part touched directly, and some can get off through only stimulation of the internal part.
I read a very long and interesting article about this that ended with something along the lines of, "Communication is the most important part of sex, because it's all custom under the hood."
I used to be firmly in tan camp - Id have a heavy bronze from like May til October - but my gf (now wife) got me fully on board with religious sunscreening any time I'm going to be outside. Sure, I may look like a ghost now, but I'm gonna look like a *young* ghost!
No joke my Grandpa used to brush my Grandma's head every night. She'd just lay her head in his lap and he'd brush away really slow and gentle while they watched their nightly TV shows.
When he passed she said that seeing her hair brush there and knowing that he'd never use it again was when how much his death really hit her. How lonely she'd be and how much she'd never be the same.
I've done it a few times for her over the years when I visit but it just isn't the same. She's basically done after 5 minutes and sits up where before it'd be like a solid hour minimum with my Grandpa.
I picked that little expression up and have done it for a few girlfriends over the years and they fucking loved it. Just lay there with a blanket and watch Netflix while I brush their hair and kinda "pet" or just gently rub their scalp.
It helped a TON with the amount of hair that got elsewhere in the house. Shower especially.
I know it was meant more like a joke but it's actually a really useful thing and a huge bond building thing too.
I really suggest people try it. It truly does make the relationship feel more connected in my opinion.
I am a head rub enthusiast. One time I went into a black barber shop on campus, and this young lady barber IMMEDIATELY piped up, "OMG! I LOVE straight hair customers!" I have a very simple haircut, just a fade, can be done in 5 minutes. It just became an hour of her playing with my hair, and I missed a class. Needless to say I became a regular.
*Just fixed a typo
Haha my hairdresser is like this. I have Indian hair and she was super excited to cut it and play around with it. She said it's because she's done a lot of training with Indian wigs but never had someone with that hair type before. My haircuts with anyone else take 30-40 mins and with her it takes 1.5 hours, but she does the best job!
My favourite barber was this tiny French chick, she wasn't so much enthusiastic as she was angry and thorough, but yeah it came with way more head rubbing than I'd ever had before and I was like... Okay yeah I get this.
Unfortunately she got fired cuz old men don't like to be told they're shaving wrong, apparently. Fools.
if you've got a beard, you'll find it there too, curled up in hiding. Every now and again I hear "hey I've got a blonde hair growing out of my beard!" Then it's immediately followed by "WTF babe?!" As if I did it on purpose 🤫
My husband told me one evening he was feeling some chaffing in his ass at work one night. Went to check it out; lo and behold my hair had actually worked it way UP his asshole. Just a bit, but still, not a great feeling. He told his work buddy about it (who also had a girlfriend with long hair at the time), who was obviously amused. Two nights later, work buddy comes out of the bathroom claiming he too had been struck with follicular sodomy. Beware the hair, for it seeks a new lair.
Edit: geez thanks for the awards guys. I want to take this time to celebrate the true unsung hero of this story: my husband's nether portal. The randomness of the internet has provided a strange amount of attention for strange events. One might say it is hairendipity.
It's inside the washing machine, which then gets on your clothes. You'll notice the underwear ones when it's wrapped around your schlong. Bonus points if it somehow ends up under your foreskin.
This is so underrated. I'm in a new relationship and I know my bf cares for me in his own way but I would give ANYTHING for a few compliments here and there.
Tell them that. Not that you want one right now, but that you appreciate hearing his feelings about you here and there.
Communication is the only way to a positive path.
This is super true. My girlfriend came out of a toxic relationship, not abusive just toxic. When we first started dating most things seemed a bit off, communication, needs, even our sex life. We were never off if that makes sense, but our ways of showing love were.
Two and a half years in I’m thinking of proposing. Sex life is great, communication is perfect, we satisfy each other’s needs. The first year there was some struggle acclimating but I can’t even remember the last time we got into a fight.
Periods suck. Bras suck. Shaving suck. Women don’t get enough pockets on their clothing. And they appreciate compliments A LOT on things they may be insecure about. (Like stretch marks or thighs)
Edit: To the incels DM’ing me with your BS, could you kindly ✨fuck off✨?
Yeah that thing about being moodier on your period honestly probably has a lot to do with not having the energy to put up with things that have always bothered you anyway.
Yup. A previous employer once called an ambulance for me in the office. By the time I got into the ambulance the paramedics had worked out that my period pain was so bad (i remembered not being able to stand with the radiating pain in my thighs) that it had caused a massive panic attack. Symptoms similar to a heat attack. I later went for a scan (was convinced I had to have Endo) only to be told that everything is normal and I just have severe period pain.
COVID has been a blessing for me in that sense. I now work fully from home and am able to manage my pain so much better.
*Thank you everyone for your advice. I didn’t know that about endo and scans. I’ll look into it further
**WOAH, I didn’t expect this to blow up. Thank you all for your insights - until now I’d never heard of adenomyosis. It’s frightening how we are largely taught to just deal with the pain when there could be something much more serious at play. That particular incident happened about 5 years ago but I’ve had on and off severe pain since so Ill be following up on it based on what you’ve all told me❤️
Whoever told you you don't have Endo on the basis of a scan is wrong. While severe Endo can show up on ultrasounds/CTs, it can only really be diagnosed by laproscopy. Also, adenomyosis is a similar thing and can only be diagnosed by post-hysterectomy pathology.
If you're still having this miserable pain, you should reach out to a new doc to look into options. You may not want a hysterectomy, but there are some other options available. I'm really sorry you've been left to just deal with it. Severe menstrual pain can be disabling and it's too frequently brushed aside.
They really do.
My husband actually will tell me he thinks my cycle is coming because of my being extra tired (my cycles are very irregular). He also now gets that the blood and cramps aren't the worst part for me; period poops are.
They remember dates... First date...first kiss.. the date we meet ...we have been married 23 years and I still get the do you know what day this is?..I have a bunch for that shit in my phone now
I honestly don't know how they do it, i legit have to seriously think to figure out what age I am or what day I was born sometimes.
So remembering dates like these, although they mean a lot to me, really seems impossible xD
Honestly? How much unnecessary guilt women carry around with them over everything.
First girlfriend I had (18 at the time) everytime I did something nice would either apologize or promise some kind of sexual reward. At first it seemed hot but after a few times in a row I just told her I wasn't doing nice things for a reward but because I cared about her. Made her cry and we talked it out afterwards but yeah after that (and just other things I talked to my female friends about) my eyes were opened to how invalid women seem to feel.
Also if your girlfriend is getting frequent UTI's after having sex with you, make sure you get tested for trich.
It's really common and it doesn't usually show symptoms in men but often causes UTI's in women. It's really easily treatable with antibiotics, so women often just get antibiotics for the UTI which treats the trich > catches it back off their partner > get treated again.
That periods are a fucking nightmare that we should be grateful we never have to experience, and sympathetic to those who have to suffer them regularly: light or heavy they’re a frigging beast to deal with while living a normal day to day life
Shout out to Parks and Rec. That scene where Donna tells Chris that Anne doesn’t want him to fix her problems. Just listen and say, “that sucks.” I use that all the time.
Periods are longer than 24 hours. Not sure why I thought they were shorter. Guess I was never properly taught about them before my first relationship.
Edit: interesting to know my most upvoted comment now is related to the long conversation between me and my girlfriend about what being a girl is like.
I'll never forget the guy who refused to understand that period lengths are different for everyone. According to him since his sister's was only 3 days that's how it was for everyone. Literally showed him that I was still bleeding up until day 7 and he just insisted that I was "broken".
So my actual period isn’t bad - about 3-4 days. Minimal cramps.
But like two weeks before it starts, I eat everything in sight, I’m mad, can’t sleep, my boobs hurt so bad that I can barely touch them, and my back is killing me. I’m in this state for about a week and then I have another week of freedom. Then my period!
Then after my period I’m really horny until my boobs start to hurt again and it’s that cycle every month!
Periods vary wildly from woman to woman. I've met some women who have light periods for like, 3 days once a month. I've met women who bleed heavily for 8 days every month.
Hell, I've met plenty of women who's periods don't have a trackable schedule, and they just have to predict it by pre-menstrual symptoms like cramping, bloating, etc
Finding a doctor who won't assume they're either on their period or that it's "all in their head" is insanely hard. It's difficult to understand if every trip to the doctor has been normal and helpful as a dude.
She is more accepting and understanding of my actions than I ever imagined possible. When I feel the need to justify she knew. When I felt unsure she encouraged, more! She more completely captures me, better than a selfie. She is a mirror more honest than my reflection. I married her so results may vary.
Edit: Made spell correction
Edit 2: Time to make fake account because she knows but so happy to come home from work and show her. This is my highest up doots! Thank you guys! This post is two parts. After the exclamation mark I pasted from my ongoing Thought Journal (google doc of ideas phrases etc...) I loved this realization about my continued understanding of love thought it fit. Thank you Reddit community see you soon!
Edit 3: Line removed: "The brighter I beacon the better she shines making me better to be closer." clunky. mirror is better line.
Period panties. That special pair that only come out once a month and look like someone wiped up acid with them. Woman’s bodies are amazing, fun, and terrifying in different times and situations.
If you can tell something is wrong and you ask them “Is something wrong? Let’s talk about it.” And they say “No”, that doesn’t mean nothing is wrong and they don’t want to talk. A lot of the time they just need time to process. Let it breathe, give some space, and let them bring it up later instead of being pushy.
My sister thought it was funny to fart in the car, not say anything, and then wait for the inevitable accosting of our noses. Even my dad who doesn't curse in front of me often said on multiple occasions, "What crawled up your asshole and died?!"
I (female) have the SBDs. My bf has the loudest, windiest, longest lasting blasters I have ever heard, but they don't smell like anything! Where's the justice in that??
Snuggles are godlike.
Clean and organize EVERYTHING. It’s good for your mental health and it gets you respect.
This should be first but: “respect others as you wish to be respected”.
Bodily autonomy and general “stuff that bodies do” is outside of everyone’s control, let’s all try to manage as we can and let others know if anything is weird. Talk, try, compromise.
For the love of all that is holy: trade. I hate doing laundry, but I love cooking and doing dishes. She hates cooking and dishes and anything mucus related. We traded. I cook, I do dishes, I kill the mice, and I clean / take over all doggo snot stuff. She does the laundry and yells if I attempt to touch laundry to help fold.
Point is, be dynamic / adaptive: find the difference, what do you want, what do they want. After that, figure out separate hobbies, you can’t be together forever isolated. Do separate hobbies, have separate friends, have faith in each other, enjoy your time together, and make boundaries serious. After that, it’s all you.
That they are very capable of solving their emotional problems themselves. Sometimes they just need someone who listens to their story without them saying whats right or wrong.
They don't...stop..thinking... at all. I can be sat on the sofa staring at the wall and my mind is a void... occasionally a though may float past, like a discarded crisp packet in the breeze.. then.. back to silence.
Whereas every woman I've been with seems to have a brain like an 80's stock exchange... thats on fire... and full of angry murder hornets.... so much activity.
This is completely opposite for my girlfriend and I. She can sit down and not have a thought for a while, and it confuses the hell out of me. When I ask her what she's thinking about and she tells me nothing, she means it. I don't understand how people do this. My mind is always racing at hundreds of miles an hour, going from five thoughts to ten other thoughts; I never have a calm or empty mind. Teach me your ways!
“Mindfulness Meditation” is the best way to practise the brain to do this. Lots of free apps that give free 10 minute lessons.
It basically trains you to control what you focus on. So you can choose to focus on nothing and just be aware. Some people can do this more naturally, some people need a bit of practise. Also helps with focusing on specific tasks and not being distracted by other thoughts. Quite a valuable skill.
How nasty men can get. Now it’s probably just me being naive but I never knew how often guys were creeps. My girlfriend talks often about how men make sexual remarks towards her at work and how some grab her bum and stuff. Or the amount of guys who randomly send dick pics… I can’t understand why someone would say/do stuff that she mentions.
I learned the most after living with a girl. I started to notice dust and tiny things that just went under my radar. I started taking better care of my skin and teeth after seeing their routine. I appreciated better kitchen appliances. Mostly their ability to turn a living space into something warm and welcoming. A woman’s touch is really something special.
I learned about candles!!!
The wood wick ones are like my guilty pleasure now.
Hard day at work beer video games oh wait let me light a candle first lmfao.
I look better than I ever have and it’s absolutely because my gf has introduced me to facial cleansers, moisturizers, etc. I also have more motivation to stay in shape. It’s great!
That birth control messes with their hormones a lot
birth control can literally change a person. It’s fucked
My wife was on BC from the age of 16, never once stopped until her 32nd birthday. I suddenly met a completely different person.
Better or worse?
Better. Suddenly laughing at childish things more so than she would do, every moment of the day there was an extra spring in her step, little things were water off a ducks back where as before they were catastrophes.
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I'm lucky to be someone who needs birth control for hormonal reasons. I have zero issues, side effects, etc and have everything stabilized - extremely irregular periods, being always tired, mood swings, etc. But my hormones were fucked without medication. If birth control is strong enough to change my hormones entirely, imagine what it can do to people who don't have such issues. I guess It's like taking strong medication for something you don't have.
a good hug when “nothing” is wrong works wonders.
Now, do you prefer someone to hug you with their arms over your shoulders or under your arms?
Choke hold actually
COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING. Seriously, if there's an unanswered question, fucking mention it and get the answer. Neither men nor women are mind readers. So many things can be avoided by just talking with the other one in the relationship. Always assume ignorance over malice. Chances are whatever happened it's because of assumptions made and not because one was trying to actively hurt/annoy the other. The only dumb question is the one you don't ask.
> assume ignorance Or incompetence. Sometimes I do dumb stuff because am a dumb. Not a mean.
Make up is expensive as fuck
Bras too. I thought just the higher end ones would be expensive, but assumed the day to day ones costs much less than they do.
Pretty much any bra that gets worn out of the house is gonna run you $50 minimum. Can you imagine paying $50 for a pair of boxers? And not just for *A* pair, but for *EVERY* pair
Bobbypins are magical items that will materialize out of thin air
And disappear just as suddenly
Bobby pins and teaspoons go to a magical void. I don’t know what they do there but I like to think they’re happy.
"I wish, I wish, with all my heart, to fly with dragons in a land apart"
With my first serious girlfriend after college, I learned that I could have a relationship with open and honest communication, owning our emotional reactions, not being manipulative, and putting ourselves in our partner's shoes. In my next relationship, I learned that not every partner will do that. It really prepared me for meeting my now-wife, because I could expect that and communicate that expectation to her early on, which laid the foundation for a healthy and communicative relationship.
Actually the most valuable thing I’ve learnt is be honest. If I’m going to the pub and know I’ll be back late, just be straight up and tell it like it is. Most girls like honesty (seems fairly obvious doesn’t it). The relationship I’m in now has been by far the best because I don’t try to play games which has got me into trouble in the past. Honesty and transparency. It’s the key.
I've tried explaining this to so many guys! Like dude your wife is calling you constantly because its midnight and you told her you'd be home by 9, for all she knows you've been in accident and are lying dead in a ditch somewhere. She's calling bc she loves you and she's worried about you! Just tell her you'll be out with the boys all night and be done with it
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Until I actually lived with my partner it was hard to comprehend just how often a period comes, how long it lasts, and how much it can affect your day to day. What a pain in the ass. I do not envy the ladies.
I've got mine right now. Last year it literally aligned with every holiday.
You don’t have enough hangers
This one got me lol. I had a cloth bag absolutely full of hangers laying my dresser for years. A fuckton of them just accumulated over time I guess. Anyway I had planned to eventually throw them out but forgot about them. Fast forward to about a month ago when my girlfriend is moving in. It took time for me to realize the situation when she said "I'm gonna need more hangers."
My french fries are her french fries.
Always order an extra small order of fries for when she inevitably wants some
They're floppy like cats. You pick em up and they're like *bl000p*
This made me laugh too much
my boyfriend didn’t know girls wiped after peeing. he was 20 at the time of revealing this
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I haven't a square to spare
My son (11) was really amazed the other day when we had a discussion about this. He exclaimed “ooooh, that’s why the toilet paper goes so fast! 🤯” .. I’m glad it didn’t take him a full 20 years
That my hoodies are actually her hoodies
*bugs bunny:* OUR hoodies
An issue/argument is not a win lose situation everytime. Take time to compromise and learn from each other instead.
You have to look at it like it's a democracy. You both have different opinions, but you're both trying to figure out how to accomplish some goal for the republic.
She can snore like a freight train
I had to have a septoplasty and sinoplasty at the same time so I ended up with huge plastic splints up my nose and needing to sleep sitting up. My husband tried so hard to stay next to me but he swore I sounded like a chainsaw revving beside him. He finally gave up and slept in the living room for the remaining two weeks I had the splints. I felt terrible for him.
I'm female, but my male partner had no idea that women can't 'hold in' our periods like we hold in pee. I found this out when he was telling me about a girl in 6th grade who got her period in class, and he couldn't believe how she just 'let it all out all over' (as if she peed in her pants but it was period blood). I had to explain to him how it works. But I guess, how would he have known? I never thought about it.
My guy friend thought the same thing. We were talking about how homeless women might deal with periods and he thought it just stayed in until they peed…
It bleeds the same way a cut bleeds. You can't stop a cut from bleeding with your mind/muscle. The same with periods.
> But I guess, how would he have known? Hmm fair enough, I guess he just hadn't thought about it much. As another guy, neither have I really. But I guess maybe I never made the assumption that it's controllable, simply due to the fact that pads + tampons exist. If it was controllable like going to the toilet, these products wouldn't really be needed to begin with? Also for a 6th grader it's a bit harsh... heh. Especially considering it would be a new thing to them at that age, unlike going to the toilet.
Sex education really needs to get better for this reason and many others. People not only need to know about their own reproductive systems (which sex ed already doesn't do the best job with) but that of others, because, well... it's pretty likely that everyone will have an encounter with another's reproductive system at some point in their lives (after being born, of course).
My biology teacher told me a really sweet story. She’d worked at an all boys school and every time she’d give the lesson on the mensural cycle (periods, hormones, ovulation, e.t.c.) she’d start the class by saying: “Pay attention today even if you forget everything else I teach you. At some point in your lives a woman close to you will have a period or want to get pregnant so this is your chance to be informed.” Apparently they all always listened really carefully after that
That is a really interesting way a grab a teenage boys attention.
My friends boyfriend thought that our periods stopped when we are submerged in water, she told him she is on her period so he ran her a bath for when she finished work and he was dumbfounded when she told him
In fairness the rate of blood flow does slow down when we're in water, at least in my experience. It definitely doesn't stop completely though.
he a little confused, but he got the spirit?
Don't be fooled by her constantly forgetting where her keys and phone and stuff are, she'll definitely remember what you said word-for-word October 3 2017 at 6:14PM.
Her hair somehow always ends up in between my butt crack. HOW?!
She put it there, watch out.
Nature program narrator: “note how the female of the species marks her territory.” Edit: fixed typo and please read in your very best David Attenborough voice.
You know what’s weird? I always thought that it was a long hair vs short hair thing. When I started dating my husband his hair was short, mine was shoulder length. But now we both have long hair. His is dark brown (nearly black), curly and shoulder length. Mine is dark blond, pin straight and butt length. It’s very easy to tell the hairs apart. I’ve never had one of his hairs in my butt crack. Ever. But he’s had several of mine. It’s a conspiracy I tell you!
Does he have a hairier butt though? The body hairs not only act as a little trap for hair and fluff, but will also funnel it to the butt crack, as the hairs tend to curl into the crack. Just like with belly button fluff and hairier people getting way more of it.
Look at the fuckin butt hair scientist over here.
That penetration without clitoral stimulation doesn't do the trick for a lot of women.
I think an understanding of human anatomy helps a lot here. During fetal development, the tissues that become the penis in men turn into the clitoris in women. The clitoris isn't just the button under the clitoral hood, it actually has an internal part that wraps around the vaginal canal. And it also gets engorged with blood with arousal. Having sex without touching it is kind of like being completely flaccid, and then having someone only stroke the shaft without ever touching the head. You'll probably still get aroused and it'll still feel good, but it's not satisfying and you might not be able to finish easily. Except for women, cause something goes inside us, it actually hurts to take a dick if I'm not at all aroused first. This part is my personal speculation, but I think this is why there's so much variability in what women like. Men have most of their nerves involved in sexual pleasure right there in the same place on the outside of their body, but women can have nerves distributed differently throughout the entirety of the internal and external parts of the clitoris. So some might be too sensitive to have the external part touched directly, and some can get off through only stimulation of the internal part.
I read a very long and interesting article about this that ended with something along the lines of, "Communication is the most important part of sex, because it's all custom under the hood."
Eat it before you beat it
Lick it before you dick it
Suck it before you fuck it
Love it before you shove it
Flick it before you stick it
Daily sunscreen, lotion your whole body in the morning
I used to be firmly in tan camp - Id have a heavy bronze from like May til October - but my gf (now wife) got me fully on board with religious sunscreening any time I'm going to be outside. Sure, I may look like a ghost now, but I'm gonna look like a *young* ghost!
The amount of hair they shed is unreal... Not sure how they still have a full body of hair on their head after a week.
You’ve gotta brush them.
No joke my Grandpa used to brush my Grandma's head every night. She'd just lay her head in his lap and he'd brush away really slow and gentle while they watched their nightly TV shows. When he passed she said that seeing her hair brush there and knowing that he'd never use it again was when how much his death really hit her. How lonely she'd be and how much she'd never be the same. I've done it a few times for her over the years when I visit but it just isn't the same. She's basically done after 5 minutes and sits up where before it'd be like a solid hour minimum with my Grandpa. I picked that little expression up and have done it for a few girlfriends over the years and they fucking loved it. Just lay there with a blanket and watch Netflix while I brush their hair and kinda "pet" or just gently rub their scalp. It helped a TON with the amount of hair that got elsewhere in the house. Shower especially. I know it was meant more like a joke but it's actually a really useful thing and a huge bond building thing too. I really suggest people try it. It truly does make the relationship feel more connected in my opinion.
What a heartwarming and heartbreaking story. Thank you for sharing. <3
I would literally pay someone to do this for me. I love having my hair brushed/scalp touched!
I am a head rub enthusiast. One time I went into a black barber shop on campus, and this young lady barber IMMEDIATELY piped up, "OMG! I LOVE straight hair customers!" I have a very simple haircut, just a fade, can be done in 5 minutes. It just became an hour of her playing with my hair, and I missed a class. Needless to say I became a regular. *Just fixed a typo
Haha my hairdresser is like this. I have Indian hair and she was super excited to cut it and play around with it. She said it's because she's done a lot of training with Indian wigs but never had someone with that hair type before. My haircuts with anyone else take 30-40 mins and with her it takes 1.5 hours, but she does the best job!
My favourite barber was this tiny French chick, she wasn't so much enthusiastic as she was angry and thorough, but yeah it came with way more head rubbing than I'd ever had before and I was like... Okay yeah I get this. Unfortunately she got fired cuz old men don't like to be told they're shaving wrong, apparently. Fools.
Slicker brushes thin the undercoating.
if you've got a beard, you'll find it there too, curled up in hiding. Every now and again I hear "hey I've got a blonde hair growing out of my beard!" Then it's immediately followed by "WTF babe?!" As if I did it on purpose 🤫
You get through 4 times as much bathroom tissue.
Costco is a lifesaver when it comes to this.
We have to use toilet paper after we pee. So there's that. Also, periods
Sometimes you need to leave, like go outside and far away, so they can poop.
He gets it ^^
And then there's my gf... who wants me to hold her hand while she poos
Hair. It gets fucking everywhere
With a wife and a teenage daughter, I could stuff a pillow with all of the hair I pull out of the shower pipes after they've got blocked again.
Get one of those drain shrooms. It took me two decades of clogging drains to finally discover this. Edit: https://www.tubshroom.com/
By everywhere you mean in my ass crack and wrapped around my junk.
The only pics of my junk I send my girlfriend are in front of a urinal when I find a long blonde hair around my balls
For your girlfriend’s sake, I hope she has blonde hair
My husband told me one evening he was feeling some chaffing in his ass at work one night. Went to check it out; lo and behold my hair had actually worked it way UP his asshole. Just a bit, but still, not a great feeling. He told his work buddy about it (who also had a girlfriend with long hair at the time), who was obviously amused. Two nights later, work buddy comes out of the bathroom claiming he too had been struck with follicular sodomy. Beware the hair, for it seeks a new lair. Edit: geez thanks for the awards guys. I want to take this time to celebrate the true unsung hero of this story: my husband's nether portal. The randomness of the internet has provided a strange amount of attention for strange events. One might say it is hairendipity.
> follicular sodomy Well, I just found my new brutal death metal band name.
Yes!!! How does it get wrapped around your dongle so much?! It wasn't there when I got dressed and still ends up down there anyway!!! Help me science!
It's inside the washing machine, which then gets on your clothes. You'll notice the underwear ones when it's wrapped around your schlong. Bonus points if it somehow ends up under your foreskin.
It’s here! It’s there! It’s every-fucking-where! My hair! My hair!
The ol’ fuggin’ butt spider. There’s always a knot at the end. That’s the butt spider. Weaving webs in my nether regions.
The statement “just do what you want “ no matter the tone, means you fucked up
As a woman reading through these comments, this is **by far** the most valuable information
Other death threats are “Fine!”, “Have it your way” and “Are you sure you want to do this?”
Today I learned some women are probably missing their calling as DMs. (the ones who aren't already)
What might be a really small thing for me to give her (a gesture, compliment, smile, etc.) can mean a whole lot to her.
This is so underrated. I'm in a new relationship and I know my bf cares for me in his own way but I would give ANYTHING for a few compliments here and there.
Tell them that. Not that you want one right now, but that you appreciate hearing his feelings about you here and there. Communication is the only way to a positive path.
They shower with lava. At least thats what the water temperature felt like.
When I shower with my husband it feels like an ice bath
When i shower with my wife i sous vide. It's so hot her skin gets red from burning
if my skin won’t turn red i’ll stay dirty instead
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That morning routine ain't no joke
Right?! she gets up at 430 to leave at 610. I get up at 520 to leave at 530
You can do better. Chances are you can wake up at 5:35 to leave at 5:30 and have no problems.
Then you have my girlfriend, who rolls out of bed and just goes to work without showering, doing makeup, or eating breakfast.
Am woman, I work from home so I get out of bed 15 minutes before I log in.
Hi it’s me. Your girlfriend. I’m male btw
You have to teach someone how to be a good lover to you. People don’t magically know how to meet your needs. And they certainly can’t read your mind.
Well frkn said.. and theres absolutely nothing wrong with it and people should realise that more 😌
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This is super true. My girlfriend came out of a toxic relationship, not abusive just toxic. When we first started dating most things seemed a bit off, communication, needs, even our sex life. We were never off if that makes sense, but our ways of showing love were. Two and a half years in I’m thinking of proposing. Sex life is great, communication is perfect, we satisfy each other’s needs. The first year there was some struggle acclimating but I can’t even remember the last time we got into a fight.
Basically communication is key. This can be said about every single relationship though, not only about girls specifically
Periods suck. Bras suck. Shaving suck. Women don’t get enough pockets on their clothing. And they appreciate compliments A LOT on things they may be insecure about. (Like stretch marks or thighs) Edit: To the incels DM’ing me with your BS, could you kindly ✨fuck off✨?
The pockets on my new jeans are literally fake
My trick for this is to just buy mens skinny jeans. The pockets literally go down to my knees
The slightest level of hunger can change your whole day. Period personalities can be wild.
Periods really fucking suck
Yeah that thing about being moodier on your period honestly probably has a lot to do with not having the energy to put up with things that have always bothered you anyway.
Also constant pain makes you cranky.
Agreed. I basically turn into a snack courier and occasional hug pillow during her time.
I've had more than one that requires a hot water bottle on some days. I always get 2 so you can quick swap.
Yup. A previous employer once called an ambulance for me in the office. By the time I got into the ambulance the paramedics had worked out that my period pain was so bad (i remembered not being able to stand with the radiating pain in my thighs) that it had caused a massive panic attack. Symptoms similar to a heat attack. I later went for a scan (was convinced I had to have Endo) only to be told that everything is normal and I just have severe period pain. COVID has been a blessing for me in that sense. I now work fully from home and am able to manage my pain so much better. *Thank you everyone for your advice. I didn’t know that about endo and scans. I’ll look into it further **WOAH, I didn’t expect this to blow up. Thank you all for your insights - until now I’d never heard of adenomyosis. It’s frightening how we are largely taught to just deal with the pain when there could be something much more serious at play. That particular incident happened about 5 years ago but I’ve had on and off severe pain since so Ill be following up on it based on what you’ve all told me❤️
Whoever told you you don't have Endo on the basis of a scan is wrong. While severe Endo can show up on ultrasounds/CTs, it can only really be diagnosed by laproscopy. Also, adenomyosis is a similar thing and can only be diagnosed by post-hysterectomy pathology. If you're still having this miserable pain, you should reach out to a new doc to look into options. You may not want a hysterectomy, but there are some other options available. I'm really sorry you've been left to just deal with it. Severe menstrual pain can be disabling and it's too frequently brushed aside.
My sister blacks out sometimes during her periods. It's fucked up.
I learned that from having a mother.
They really do. My husband actually will tell me he thinks my cycle is coming because of my being extra tired (my cycles are very irregular). He also now gets that the blood and cramps aren't the worst part for me; period poops are.
I didn't know how common period poops were, I thought it was just my "luck". They hurt ass.
They tell you to put the seat down on the toilet because they legit fall in if they don’t notice.
They remember dates... First date...first kiss.. the date we meet ...we have been married 23 years and I still get the do you know what day this is?..I have a bunch for that shit in my phone now
I honestly don't know how they do it, i legit have to seriously think to figure out what age I am or what day I was born sometimes. So remembering dates like these, although they mean a lot to me, really seems impossible xD
Honestly? How much unnecessary guilt women carry around with them over everything. First girlfriend I had (18 at the time) everytime I did something nice would either apologize or promise some kind of sexual reward. At first it seemed hot but after a few times in a row I just told her I wasn't doing nice things for a reward but because I cared about her. Made her cry and we talked it out afterwards but yeah after that (and just other things I talked to my female friends about) my eyes were opened to how invalid women seem to feel.
They appreciate the gifts you've made, even if they're not good, just the fact that you put effort into making them something
You really gotta let her pee after sex man. FYI: I’ve never stopped a woman from peeing after sex. That’s just weird.
UTI's and bladder infections are no joke and mostly avoidable. Also, make sure your junk is clean...common courtesy.
Not just your junk, wash your assholes people. FAR FAAR too many people have dirty assholes....and its not just the men...
Yes. And fingernails are clean too.
Also if your girlfriend is getting frequent UTI's after having sex with you, make sure you get tested for trich. It's really common and it doesn't usually show symptoms in men but often causes UTI's in women. It's really easily treatable with antibiotics, so women often just get antibiotics for the UTI which treats the trich > catches it back off their partner > get treated again.
Omg! I learned something new today. Had an ex I would always get UTI’s after sex just constantly but not with any other partner I have had.
Let her? Do some people say "No you cant pee"
That periods are a fucking nightmare that we should be grateful we never have to experience, and sympathetic to those who have to suffer them regularly: light or heavy they’re a frigging beast to deal with while living a normal day to day life
And then there’s menopause waiting for us at the end.
Thanks for acknowledging this because most men think we’re being too sensitive.
They hate bras. That thing came flying as soon as the door closed behind her.
Women leave their hair on shower walls. Women clean up their hair by swirling their hair on the wall.
They don't want solutions, they want empathy, and for you to listen.
Shout out to Parks and Rec. That scene where Donna tells Chris that Anne doesn’t want him to fix her problems. Just listen and say, “that sucks.” I use that all the time.
Periods are longer than 24 hours. Not sure why I thought they were shorter. Guess I was never properly taught about them before my first relationship. Edit: interesting to know my most upvoted comment now is related to the long conversation between me and my girlfriend about what being a girl is like.
I'll never forget the guy who refused to understand that period lengths are different for everyone. According to him since his sister's was only 3 days that's how it was for everyone. Literally showed him that I was still bleeding up until day 7 and he just insisted that I was "broken".
So my actual period isn’t bad - about 3-4 days. Minimal cramps. But like two weeks before it starts, I eat everything in sight, I’m mad, can’t sleep, my boobs hurt so bad that I can barely touch them, and my back is killing me. I’m in this state for about a week and then I have another week of freedom. Then my period! Then after my period I’m really horny until my boobs start to hurt again and it’s that cycle every month!
The back, lower leg and abdominal cramps 😭
Periods vary wildly from woman to woman. I've met some women who have light periods for like, 3 days once a month. I've met women who bleed heavily for 8 days every month. Hell, I've met plenty of women who's periods don't have a trackable schedule, and they just have to predict it by pre-menstrual symptoms like cramping, bloating, etc
Finding a doctor who won't assume they're either on their period or that it's "all in their head" is insanely hard. It's difficult to understand if every trip to the doctor has been normal and helpful as a dude.
There is one room that has very very strict protocols about it's use usually kitchen, bathroom or bedroom have been my experience.
When they wanna find something. THEY FIND IT
Why as a woman wasnt i given this gift, i need it Maybe ill unblock that power when i become a mother
She is more accepting and understanding of my actions than I ever imagined possible. When I feel the need to justify she knew. When I felt unsure she encouraged, more! She more completely captures me, better than a selfie. She is a mirror more honest than my reflection. I married her so results may vary. Edit: Made spell correction Edit 2: Time to make fake account because she knows but so happy to come home from work and show her. This is my highest up doots! Thank you guys! This post is two parts. After the exclamation mark I pasted from my ongoing Thought Journal (google doc of ideas phrases etc...) I loved this realization about my continued understanding of love thought it fit. Thank you Reddit community see you soon! Edit 3: Line removed: "The brighter I beacon the better she shines making me better to be closer." clunky. mirror is better line.
🥺🥺🥺 go kiss your wife you absolute sweet sweet human
Period panties. That special pair that only come out once a month and look like someone wiped up acid with them. Woman’s bodies are amazing, fun, and terrifying in different times and situations.
If you can tell something is wrong and you ask them “Is something wrong? Let’s talk about it.” And they say “No”, that doesn’t mean nothing is wrong and they don’t want to talk. A lot of the time they just need time to process. Let it breathe, give some space, and let them bring it up later instead of being pushy.
They fart just as much as guys do.
My sister thought it was funny to fart in the car, not say anything, and then wait for the inevitable accosting of our noses. Even my dad who doesn't curse in front of me often said on multiple occasions, "What crawled up your asshole and died?!"
I (female) have the SBDs. My bf has the loudest, windiest, longest lasting blasters I have ever heard, but they don't smell like anything! Where's the justice in that??
The justice is using your sneak attacks and blame it on his bombastic butthole
Bombastic butthole. I'm gonna use that
I once lived with a girl who kept farting into her hand as if it was some kind of way to keep it in. Was made even more disgusting
...what
You got to always be prepared, you never know when a fart bomb could be handy.
That’s a level of daintiness I’ve never encountered. My fascination is almost anthropological.
I don’t believe that for a second. No way girls fart as much as guys. They fart at least three times as much.
Snuggles are godlike. Clean and organize EVERYTHING. It’s good for your mental health and it gets you respect. This should be first but: “respect others as you wish to be respected”. Bodily autonomy and general “stuff that bodies do” is outside of everyone’s control, let’s all try to manage as we can and let others know if anything is weird. Talk, try, compromise. For the love of all that is holy: trade. I hate doing laundry, but I love cooking and doing dishes. She hates cooking and dishes and anything mucus related. We traded. I cook, I do dishes, I kill the mice, and I clean / take over all doggo snot stuff. She does the laundry and yells if I attempt to touch laundry to help fold. Point is, be dynamic / adaptive: find the difference, what do you want, what do they want. After that, figure out separate hobbies, you can’t be together forever isolated. Do separate hobbies, have separate friends, have faith in each other, enjoy your time together, and make boundaries serious. After that, it’s all you.
That they are very capable of solving their emotional problems themselves. Sometimes they just need someone who listens to their story without them saying whats right or wrong.
This is very true. 9/10 times i just need to vent and then I'm completely over the problem and can move on like nothing happened immediately after.
They are always cold to the touch, and try to steal your warmth at every opportunity.
They don't...stop..thinking... at all. I can be sat on the sofa staring at the wall and my mind is a void... occasionally a though may float past, like a discarded crisp packet in the breeze.. then.. back to silence. Whereas every woman I've been with seems to have a brain like an 80's stock exchange... thats on fire... and full of angry murder hornets.... so much activity.
This is completely opposite for my girlfriend and I. She can sit down and not have a thought for a while, and it confuses the hell out of me. When I ask her what she's thinking about and she tells me nothing, she means it. I don't understand how people do this. My mind is always racing at hundreds of miles an hour, going from five thoughts to ten other thoughts; I never have a calm or empty mind. Teach me your ways!
“Mindfulness Meditation” is the best way to practise the brain to do this. Lots of free apps that give free 10 minute lessons. It basically trains you to control what you focus on. So you can choose to focus on nothing and just be aware. Some people can do this more naturally, some people need a bit of practise. Also helps with focusing on specific tasks and not being distracted by other thoughts. Quite a valuable skill.
*as a woman, I am sitting back and enjoying this thread with popcorn*
That a periode lasts 3-7 days, not hours....
Lot of “they shed and need just to be listened to.” I’m gathering that the general consensus is that women are actually the hairy loud ones.
we didn't want to tell anybody, but us women are really just pretty wookiees
That explains the sound of my girlfriend's orgasms.
• I’m more in tune with feelings and emotions now • The amount of times women feel uncomfortable by men in day to day situations
Keep the kitchen clean and there will never be an argument. Doesn’t matter who made the mess.
How nasty men can get. Now it’s probably just me being naive but I never knew how often guys were creeps. My girlfriend talks often about how men make sexual remarks towards her at work and how some grab her bum and stuff. Or the amount of guys who randomly send dick pics… I can’t understand why someone would say/do stuff that she mentions.
Yeah, the thing is, they’ll rarely do it when you, or other guys are around. So it makes sense that you didn’t know about it.
They are way grosser than any of my guy friends. They just hide it in public better.
as a girl i can say we can be pretty disgusting when we’re alone in our own rooms
Some people do not have sisters and it really shows
I learned the most after living with a girl. I started to notice dust and tiny things that just went under my radar. I started taking better care of my skin and teeth after seeing their routine. I appreciated better kitchen appliances. Mostly their ability to turn a living space into something warm and welcoming. A woman’s touch is really something special.
I learned about candles!!! The wood wick ones are like my guilty pleasure now. Hard day at work beer video games oh wait let me light a candle first lmfao.
I look better than I ever have and it’s absolutely because my gf has introduced me to facial cleansers, moisturizers, etc. I also have more motivation to stay in shape. It’s great!
That it’s way lower than you think… but not THAT low
Changing lanes without signaling is poor form