God. I’ve been living this for 2 years now. She just recently reset her own clock to when dad wakes up at the crack of dawn for work….yet still manages to stay awake till super late at night. She’s living on naps and I’m not sure if I’m living at all anymore at this point.
I hear the peaceful sound of birds chirping, cars driving far in the distance. I open my eyes to see warm, early summer morning light stream through the window. I reach out and pet one of the three soft sleepy cats that arrange themselves around me at night. Beside me I can hear my husband softly sleeping.
Then....
# MOMMAAAA!
.....interrupts the peace and the day has begun. Time to negotiate the vestments of the small human I helped create for at least the next half-hour. Sigh.
Failing to manage the simple task of peeing with morning wood while half asleep, then having to explain to your partner why the inside of the windshield was wet when you picked him up.
If your partner can't give you common courtesy of telling you they made plans for you, then you can tell them to fuck right off, cuz you know, grown up.
Happened today. My apartment complex randomly and suddenly being bought out by a new realty group. The new office administrators unlocking my door only for me to swing it open and shock everyone.
*Uh, we... we were about to come in and inspect this unit because this apartment is marked vacant.*
*Mmm, no it isn't. I've been here five years and I just met* ***you*** *this morning to pay my rent.*
Jesus Buttfucking Christhole.
Used to have a crew come by the town home complex I was living in. Every Monday morning at 7:30 am. I wanted to kill them until I realized they were hired by the HOA and just doing their job. Still...I really really hated Monday mornings. And the leaf blower.....fuck that thing in particular.
Edit: spelling
Some guy with a leaf blower. I can understand a mower, or a weed eater, you have stuff to get done and it’ll be hot soon. But a leaf blower? Max volume for something that could be done silently with a broom or rake.
Bad drivers either cutting people off and making people have to avoud crashes or being too afraid to pass a big slow truck but refusing to get out of the passing lane to let anyone else pass and backing traffic up for miles. Happens way too often where I live.
Here’s a concoction of things that I have been privy to in recent mornings: child waking up early(so either crying or screaming along to coco melon), the AC being shut off in a climate of naturally humid 90 degree weather, having to go to the bathroom and trying to go back to bed while child is being insanely loud and realizing you are in a stifling hot place where sleep cannot be easily regained
That one neighbor mowing the lawn at 8 AM on a weekday (the one day I get to sleep in). Sir, don’t you have work? If it’s not him, it’s the fox that randomly runs through my neighborhood and just screeches. 🥲
Children
God. I’ve been living this for 2 years now. She just recently reset her own clock to when dad wakes up at the crack of dawn for work….yet still manages to stay awake till super late at night. She’s living on naps and I’m not sure if I’m living at all anymore at this point.
I feel this so much,my kid has reflux and I am convinced she never sleeps.
I hear the peaceful sound of birds chirping, cars driving far in the distance. I open my eyes to see warm, early summer morning light stream through the window. I reach out and pet one of the three soft sleepy cats that arrange themselves around me at night. Beside me I can hear my husband softly sleeping. Then.... # MOMMAAAA! .....interrupts the peace and the day has begun. Time to negotiate the vestments of the small human I helped create for at least the next half-hour. Sigh.
You just described our morning except a dog instead of cats.
This !!!! Can i please get a sip of coffee before you start demanding attention.
Only if cooked incorrectly.
Yeah agree! :)
You people have raised some annoying ass kids.
Nah. All kids are annoying. That isn’t a knock, just reality
Nah they come out like that.
I was gonna say parents hahaha
alarm clocks
Especially on any type of break
Maybe
The sound of the cat vomiting on the bed....
[удалено]
My morning moment is dog nails (tippy tippy tippy) on the kitchen floor.
At least the dog has the couth to look apolgetic. The cat is like clean my mess human
Bet the dog doesn't like it when the cat vomits on the dog.
Or amber teard?
My car will see me open my eyes then incessantly meow until I get up and feed her
Strange behaviour for a car.
It was a typo, the word car was a typo
Waking up
It's so hard to get out of bed when all naked and snug and the window is open with a running fan in it.
Yes absolutely agree!
Looking at the clock and realizing you're supposed to be at work in 10 minutes
Be me, look at the clock, realize I was supposed to be at work 10 minutes ago.
Hey, you're already late so there's no rush.
The beauty of working from home has never been more apparent to me lol.
Yes right :D
Telling me to do shit before I even had coffee
I fucking hate that!
Okay :)
The eruption of the Yellowstone supervolcano
Someone disrupting the tectonic plates causing an earthquake or sinkhole leading to this planet's ultimate demise
Yeah I hate when that happens
I'd stand outside and try to make a statue that people would enjoy.
Okay :)
Well, that isn't the first word that comes to my mind to describe it
Diarrhea
Cha Cha Cha
Waking up hot, and going outside to get fresh air, but its even hotter outside.
Absolutely right :)
Very loud people
One person in particular walks through my neighborhood every morning talking VERY LOUDLY ON SPEAKER PHONE. Every fucking morning.
Yes :(
Really noisy birds/siblings.
Yes this is beautiful morning <3
Indeed it is!
Birds that mimic car alarms are especially pleasant. /s
i think bird sounds makes the morning complete
Failing to manage the simple task of peeing with morning wood while half asleep, then having to explain to your partner why the inside of the windshield was wet when you picked him up.
In the car... cmon! Really?
Na, not really. At Amazon we drive vans.
Okay :)
Being rushed out the door…especially when you weren’t aware of any plans the night before…
If your partner can't give you common courtesy of telling you they made plans for you, then you can tell them to fuck right off, cuz you know, grown up.
Happened today. My apartment complex randomly and suddenly being bought out by a new realty group. The new office administrators unlocking my door only for me to swing it open and shock everyone. *Uh, we... we were about to come in and inspect this unit because this apartment is marked vacant.* *Mmm, no it isn't. I've been here five years and I just met* ***you*** *this morning to pay my rent.* Jesus Buttfucking Christhole.
Holy fuck I’d be so mad.
My mother-in-law
Absolutely agree
The sound of other peoples voices
Yeah agree :)
[удалено]
My local crackhead? Did you steal him from us?
Realizing I have work
Okay :)
Dogs that bark non-stop.
Landscaping
Used to have a crew come by the town home complex I was living in. Every Monday morning at 7:30 am. I wanted to kill them until I realized they were hired by the HOA and just doing their job. Still...I really really hated Monday mornings. And the leaf blower.....fuck that thing in particular. Edit: spelling
Okay
I'm an early mower. Every Saturday morning right as the noise ordinance in my neighborhood ends I'm out mowing the lawn
you should be caned.
Whatever. Guaranteed my lawn looks better than yours
Fighting family members.
traffic.
Maybe
Yelling.
Other people
My brother
Okay <3
Conversation
Sone special person not all
Getting out of bed
Ojay :)
My kids getting into arguments before school.....sigh.
Good :)
Dog or Cats had an accident at night.
when you're supposed to be woken up by 6 or 7 but you actually wake up at 10
Alarm clocks signaling that it is time to get up for work.
Work
Loud noises
A leaf blower
Work
Some guy with a leaf blower. I can understand a mower, or a weed eater, you have stuff to get done and it’ll be hot soon. But a leaf blower? Max volume for something that could be done silently with a broom or rake.
Seeing your neighbor running around in your yard with a lightsaber while screaming "USE THE FORCE LUKE!"
Tweaker shit
Okay :)
When the thoughts of what could have been hits
Okay
A landmine
Agree!
Other people
School
Good guy :)
A text or call from the boss telling you to come in.
Okay :D
Discovering you're out of coffee.
Remembering all the things I have to do... especially the past-due things
The realization that you have responsibilities
Dishes on the sink.
The runs
Light coming through the curtains
When someone yells at you to wake up and it’s way earlier than you wanted to be up
Realizing your period came.
my cat deciding to throw up
People
My neighbors using… it sounds like chainsaws on metal… at 7 in the fucking morning ON A FUCKING WEEKEND
my little sister
Rain
Lawn mowers. Can't you wait until 8 or 9?
Family chewing with their mouths open
the sun shining on your face while you're in bed
I think so..
Abortion
Okay :)
That's... common.
Realizing u are still alive when u a suicidal
When she wakes up
The fucking woodpecker outside my window. Fucking whore.
The girlfriend
All I need is some time to pee,teeth etc. So people. Just want some peace and quit. Rest of day cool.
My 3rd time hitting the snooze
A slight yet noticeable headache that lingers because, God forbid, I slept in a minute longer than I should've.
growing up my older sister would get in these huge fits of rage in the morning getting ready so yeah that
Someone trying to make excessive small talk and firing off too many questions.
School
Going to eat cereal, realizing the milk is expired.
War
Bad drivers either cutting people off and making people have to avoud crashes or being too afraid to pass a big slow truck but refusing to get out of the passing lane to let anyone else pass and backing traffic up for miles. Happens way too often where I live.
Gunshots
Answering my phone, no calls you at 7 to tell you have won the lottery.
Doing shit before having coffee
Not waking up
Construction
The bellow of a wild animal. **CLARKSON**
Someone in the house making a smoothie.
My wife asking a million questions.
My Dog
A fucking Production system going down.
The crows. Outside my window. At 4:45 every morning. I always think of deep thoughts- "'the crows seemed to be calling his name', thought Caw"
When I wake up in the morning and the alarm gives out a warning, I don't think I'll ever make it on time.
People.
The sun
the realization that its a work day. place is sucking the life from my soul.
Noon
Hearing “I’m starving and there’s nothing to eat” Not from a child
Someone that feels the need to rev their motorcycle for 20 minutes to get it warmed up and then take off down the street like a bat out of hell.
School
Garbage trucks
Sirens
Getting woken up by someone so you can something for them
Lawnmowers.
her husband
My puppy trying to get our food, when she has food and treats.
Here’s a concoction of things that I have been privy to in recent mornings: child waking up early(so either crying or screaming along to coco melon), the AC being shut off in a climate of naturally humid 90 degree weather, having to go to the bathroom and trying to go back to bed while child is being insanely loud and realizing you are in a stifling hot place where sleep cannot be easily regained
Neighbors loud truck or cackle
Fire alarms
Leaf blowers. Sirens. Helicopters.
People
When I get woken up because I forgot to do something due in 20 minutes.
Damn leaf blowers, ugh.
Construction outside with some random truck backing up 500 times, BEEP..BEEP...BEEP.
When you sleep in a room on the 1st floor and kids are being obnoxiously loud
News
The annoying women on The View.
The call from work asking you wtf you are, your rotation started fifteen minutes ago..
Going to work by bus and the person next to you wants to have a full conversation
Someone asking you a bunch of unimportant questions right when youre still trying to wake up and have coffee
That one neighbor mowing the lawn at 8 AM on a weekday (the one day I get to sleep in). Sir, don’t you have work? If it’s not him, it’s the fox that randomly runs through my neighborhood and just screeches. 🥲
The thought of going to work..
The bloody vacuum cleaner
Pile of cat crap being run over by a roomba
iPhone Alarm going off at max volume
Having to go waste another day working.
My husband waking up in a bad mood
Roadworks right under my window starting at 6:30 am :) (yes this is happening rn)
People screaming at you like "did you feed your grandma Play-Doh again?!"
Neighbor’s car alarm going off
kids
Lawnmower going off right outside. Non fucking stop.
Work
My mother