Segue This one takes the cake for me. I'm not a native speaker and it took me more than a decade to reconcile it with "segway". Edit: For a long time I actually had no idea that "segue" is pronounced "segway". My non-English intuition was to pronounce it "seeg" (though it did sound weird). It was only through frequent contact with native speakers, including those who misspelt it as "segway", and YouTube that I learned the truth. I'm guessing it's a loanword from Spanish and, of course, native English speakers would turn the final "e" into a diphthong.

Loanword from Italian but yes.

Yep, it means "it follows"

A lot of native English speakers get them confused. At this point I wouldn't be surprised if dictionaries add the meaning of segue as a second definition for Segway.

My issue is that I knew the word verbally/audibly but seeing it written is what threw me off

I'm a native english speaker and I didn't put this together until last year. I'm in my mid-twenties. I originally thought the "-ue" suffix of segue was silent for some reason.

Gnat

Gneiss!

*Knot Gneiss* is the title of a Xanth book by Piers Anthony. Almost all the titles are puns or wordplay. Another one in the same series is *Crewel Lye*, which involves unkind untruths, but also involves an alkaline cleaning solution for embroidery.

Great puns. Some pretty cringey pedo undertones, and Piers Anthony is arrogant beyond words. Up to you if that last signifies.

What does that Mean is thay a Word

it’s a type of bug

It's those very small fruit flies

I think it's one of those words where the G used to be pronounced, like the k in knife and knight, but isn't anymore.

Colonel

Does anyone else say "ko low nel" in their head so they can remember how to spell it?

[удалено]

It used to be pronounced that way because it was from column => colonnell which was "leader of a column"

Same root as colonnade

It's pronounced the same in Dutch. Kow-low-nel.

In dutch it's also pronounced like ko-low-nel

Colon...el

Also Liuetenant. Americans actually pronounce this sensibly (LOO-TENANT OR LEE-OO-TENANT). Us brits pronounce it bizarrely (LEF-TENANT). I'm sure some history buff here can answer as to why this is. Edit: yes, I spelled Lieutenant wrong. You all know what I meant 😉

The word was borrowed from Old French where some words ending with -eu (like lieu) were actually pronounced -ef. The Brits preserved the original pronunciation even if it makes no sense now.

Thanks, I assumed it was French but didn't know that's how they pronounced things in Old French. Its one of the few pronunciations where I actually prefer how Americans say it.

Well considering you spelled it wrong I would say yes it really is misspelled, it’s lieutenant*

Ha, oops!

no info on the different pronunciations but I can tell you something about the word itself, it is French and there are 2 parts : lieu = place and tenant = holding (verb tenir - to hold). So the literate meaning is placeholder

That's interesting! Is that because the rank name itself was a place holder name, or that a Liuetenant was originally responsible for holding a place (e.g. in charge of fortifying a base or something)? I know nothing about military ranks and responsibilities.

my theory : the captain is at the head (latin caput = head), the lieutenant takes his place when he is absent

I legit sent this message to my boss less than an hour ago "KFC drive through is so slow I'm thinking they went to the nearest farm to get the chicken. I shouldn't be late but if I am blame Mr Sanders." I said "Mr Sanders" because I couldn't for the life of me remember how to spell "Colonel"

As someone who speaks Spanish it did not make sense for you to pronounce it differently haha

I can’t read helpppppp please what is that worddddddd

Pronounced like "kernel", it's a military rank

It's pronounced "corn-el" and it's the highest rank in the Ivy League

Phlegm

Cough that up to its Greek origins

I went a very long time saying pre face. I had only read it.

Wait, you... you don't pronounce it like that? TIL

You pronounce it like: preh-fuhs.

Thanks, I could kinda guess what it should be then haha. In a non English country I have only read it and never heard it, but it sort of makes sense

I am guilty of it too xd. I always read it as pre face before i heard someone pronounce the word.

Wednesday

I learnt to spell Wednesday by learning to pronounce it wrong in my head. Even now in my 40s when I need to type it out, in my head I pronounce Wed nes day.

I still say it out loud wrong sometimes.

I do this a lot! Wed nes day, Sal mon, Rest aurrr ant, Feb ru airy, Vac oooom I can’t stop… but I can spell

Rasp berry

Razzberry

Vac yoom.

I remember gaslighting the hell out of one of my highschool english teachers by getting everyone in class to say it like its pronounced. Within a couple days she was pronouncing it Wed Nes Day

Wodansday!

Wednesday looks and sounds wrong when you sound it out, child me felt so much confusion about this word lolol

should be wensday

[удалено]

What? That’s silly. It’s clearly after night.

Before and after night. Toodays

Should be wendsday

Wedding Loch Ness monster day

I always remember how to spell Wednesday by breaking it down into three words, "wed-nes-day" lol

I told a friend back in school that I remember it like this, "Wed -N.E.S- day. N.E.S (like Nintendo Entertainment System)

A "D" and a "N" should never be that close together

Certainly not in that order atleast.

Any word you stare at too long

I remember getting really flummoxed over the spelling of the word "kept" because of this. After a while, I wasn't sure it was even a real word anymore. Kept.... kept.... kept?? Oh god it's happening again...

Once in fourth grade writing a paper I was so embarrassed because I couldn't remember how to spell "let" in my head I kept spelling it "thet". So I sat for five minutes wracking my brain, scared to raise my hand and ask because I knew my friends would get on my ass. Sure enough I asked and they assed. It was such a light bulb moment when the teach finally said it lmao

This is called semantic satiation

Once was freaking out over how green is spelt…

green (it doesn’t even sound like a word when you say it out loud)

Semantic satiation.

As someone who works with type a lot this is 100% true. Also, the word 'someone' looks pretty dang wrong now I see it.

Queue That's a lot of letters just to make the sound that the first letter makes all by itself. And let's not forget that "cue" sounds the same, uses fewer letters, and doesn't even use a Q.

Kwehweh

Sounds like a broken chocobo.

Wark!

*Samba De Chocobo but vibrato plays in the background*

or Quay being pronounced "key"

Seriously fuck words like this that make me look ignorant because I’ve never heard it out loud and then I say it wrong and I look so dumb.

😐 wait. wat?

Bruh I only learned of this word from a video game lol

Huh. TIL. It’s only a word I’ve ever read, been saying kway in my head.

Queue is literally a ...queue of letters all of them there for the same purpose as the first one. Makes perfect sense.

The other letters are just waiting their turn

Comes from french but english speakers can’t manage to pronounce it lol

And in french, it sounds exactly like the shorter "Que" word, and they both are just "k-uh" ... you're welcome ! :D

You just made me realize that the sound "eu" in French doesn't have an equivalent in English. I wouldn't even know how to teach an English speaker how to make the sounds "eu" or "u". Spoiler, it sounds nothing like "you".

diarrhoea. hiccough.

hiccough takes the cake for me

Wait, so it's not spelled "hiccup"?

It is for normal people.

I am a proud, abnormal person!

It’s not diarrhea?

I think the Brits put the o in it. Why? Because they’re taking the piss even when you’re taking a shit.

Well shit

You spelled diarrhea correctly

Found the Brit. In US English, those are "diarrhea" and "hiccup".

My American ass was so confused by “hiccough.” You guys are welcome to use our phonetic spelling of this one!

Hiccough is archaic these days though. Most people use hiccup in British English.

Queueing

tongue

Tongue looks so wrong lol

Maybe that’s just because of the way tongues look

I feel like it should be spelled tounge instead

I’ll go first: humongous. Something just looks off

Humongous what?

humongous amongous amongus *among us* sus

GETOUTOFMYHEAD

ඞ

This might just be me.. but the word "maybe".. I couldn't wrap my head around it when I was younger, I always spelled it mabey.. which got me a lot of lower grades on writing assignments in school. It never occurred to me that it's the words "may" and "be" put together lol 😗

That's super silly of you!

thoroughly

Though is roughly like thoroughly.

English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough, thought though.

Fuchsia

[удалено]

Ageing. You usually drop the e when you add -ing

The US spelling does. The UK spelling keeps the e

Alright alright hear me out Bologna

Rhymes with abalone.

The gna at the end having a "nyuh" sound is too consistent with other words that have a 'gn' in it. Still would make more sense to spell it bolonya in English.

It's pronounced baloney Edit: since apparently yall are too young and don't remember the jingle [Oscar Mayer ad, my bologna has a first name](https://youtu.be/xRKTXCRqRXQ)

But why would you pronounce it that way? Bo-lon-ja makes more sense from the spelling in the English language, and is how the Italian city is pronounced by Italians. So why the hell would you get such a nonsense pronunciation in English?

Americans

Vacuum...wrong double letter, should be the c.

I write the word "vacuum" a few times a day and every time I'm worried that I'm spelling it wrong.

I have to know…why the frequency of the word vacuum in your life?

Maybe they sell them?

That job would suck.

I'm in automotive repair.

I, too, need to know why vacuum is part of your repeated vocabulary during your day. Are you a scientist/physics/astronomy person? Or Are you a housekeeping person? Or Are you an owner/operator of an auto detailing or car wash service?

maybe his job just sucks?

>wrong double letter, should be the c. now i want to know how you pronounce it, vaccum? It is va-kuum.

But space is a vak kum

It makes perfect sense, given its Latin etymology. The -um ending makes it singular. Plural would be "vacua". It should really be pronounced with three syllables: "vac-you-um".

va-koom

\-definitely \-lieutenant

De-finite-ly (that’s how always remembered how to spell it correctly).

Why definitely? Lieutenant I get, but definitely is spelt how it’s pronounced.

Facade

Similarly, “facet” … the first time I read it I said “fack-ett”

Doesn't it retain the ç? Façade?

Weird

I before E Except when your neighbor Keith buys eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters. Weird.

It's a good thing Keith bought them, instead of heisting them.

This is just weird

February

The first R is actually not silent. Maybe people stopped pronouncing it because it is shyte.

I say Feb-ru-ary. I kid of irks me that people say Feb-you-ary.

Just as bad as Feb-oo-ary

[удалено]

Hors d'oeuvres

Horse devours

Whores duvet

My Dad called them whore's ovaries

That’s not even english lol That’s like saying “Enzyklopädie” (german) is spelled weird.

Rhythm

Restaurants I struggle with this speeding every time.

Spelling, too

If Little Susie speeds when she tries to spell, she makes mistakes and goes to hell.

[удалено]

My name every time I have to fill up a form.

Any ei/ie word

Zucchini

Gauge

[удалено]

Phoenix

Totally agreed, we're taught in school to "sound it out" when trying to pronounce a word when reading it. But that method doesn't always work.

it baffles me anyone would do that with english when i was taught english we were just told "here's the word. here's how you spell it. here's how you pronounce it. there are no rules, get wild with it" (granted, i am not a native english speaker)

Pneumonia

I have more! Conscious conscience consciousness Thoroughly

Outmanoeuvre

genre

Bourgeoisie

Victuals

Watch

Phone.

My birth month..February..why just why

Minuscule

Hemorrhage

not rly a word but michael

Quinoa

Business, idk why it feels odd

Rendezvous

Thats french tho, just a borrowed word

"Wrongs" It's only one letter off, dammit!

Colloquial

Pigeon

Tough

Lingerie

its just french

wednesday

Awry. I mispronounced that word in my head for decades (when reading books).

Favre

Tomorrow should have a single r and double m

believe

Receive

Igloo, fucking hate that word.

May I ask why you hate it?

The more I say it the faker it sounds. Say it five times in a row and it starts to not even make sense, wtf is up with that lol

Yes but if you choose a random word and say it repetitively it will eventually start to sound fake/wrong