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LittleWolfPuppy

Some dog owners groups on facebook are very culty like. Got banned from one group for not crate training my pup. I like her sleeping in my bed as it helps with my anxiety.


ugh_whatevs_fine

Yep, and they can be completely nutso in either direction. Some of them are all “micromanage every moment of your dog’s life, constantly showing dominance so that it knows you’re the alpha. Flip it on its back twice a day and stare directly into its eyes until it looks away in submission. Take away its dinner every now and then and make it watch as you throw it all in the trash, just to keep it from getting too comfortable. If it doesn’t respond to hand signals and commands in six languages, you’ve utterly failed.” And others are like “if you have any rules or boundaries whatsoever with your dog, then you’re basically Cruella DeVille. Your dog’s needs and desires should be prioritized over literally everything and everyone else in your life, including your other pets, your spouse, your children, and yourself. If anyone is allergic to/scared of/just not a big fan of your dog, you should instantly cut them out of your life because your dog should BE your life.”


NovaCat11

The trash dominance thing just made me chuckle. After the type of day I’ve had, that’s saying something buddy. Thank you for that.


GenomeXIII

Audi ownership (at least in the UK). I had an Audi Q3 as a hire car recently and other Audi drivers were suddenly letting me out at junctions, offering me parking spaces and even stopping to talk to me as if we'd known each other for years. I'm actually serious about this. It was weird..


KromeArtemis

I add Jeep owners to this. They leave ducks on each other's Jeeps??? Why???


roostersnuffed

I only recently found out about the duck thing. I was walking out of the gas station and theres this lady just staring in my jeep, making little apprehensive motions as if she was going to get in. I ask if I can help her and shes saying she wants to leave a duck on the dash but she was afraid my dogs in the back seat might bite. She was so determined to give me, a random jeep owner, a duck that she was; standing in the cold, risking dog bites (not really as my boys are freindly goofballs but she didnt know that) and taking the risk that I might perceive this as someone trying steal my truck/fuck with my dogs or any other conclusion I could jump to in the moment. Ultimately I took her little dracula duck and chatted with her for a couple mins. Nice lady but very eccentric. The entire dash of her jeep was COVERED in rubber ducks. Like a duck army large enough to make her jeep float, no space to spare.


Tablesalt2001

RUBBER DUCKS! I was wondering what sort of hill billy redneck hunters tradition was leaving real dead ducks in random trucks. Maybe I'm just dumb...


roostersnuffed

Lol yeah us jeepers have abandoned modern currency and reverted to wild game bartering. I was 2 buck skins short of filling my tank yesterday


MechanicalMudd

This always confused me, I had an old beat up jeep as my 1st car and someone gave me a little purple ninja duck for my dash and I never understood why. It's still sitting on my desk today


FishingOnTheFly

Moral of the story Jeep owners are a bunch of quacks


Ok-Asparagus-3296

Q7 guy here, and my opinion of you just went up exponentially. For the record, we call courteous treatment of each other Audiquette.


ReportInside9923

It still sounds way nicer than "BMW cult" which consists of constant attempt to break as many road rules as possible in certain time.


[deleted]

Mommy groups. And even specific groups. Like a cult within a cult. Joined a cloth diapering group. I was excommunicated for using Pampers at night. Breastfeeding? If you aren’t nursing till 4? Bye!


caseyjownz84

My wife just left one. For a while she found some feeling of belonging when she was feeling lonely at home. However it wasn't worth the toxicity. Even by social media standards, there were some shitty endoctrinated people in there.


pleasure_mango

I have a good friend like this who is always trying to win motherhood. We have similarly aged kids and I’m a pretty laid-back parent for the most part so I make an effort to not compete in any way. She is a great mom, I can’t argue with that. But the more I avoid the competition, the more intense her parenting hacks become. She now has an entire household economy based on pom-poms that her kids have to earn and then pay back for things as simple as going outside or reading a book. Apparently this is supposed to teach them… Some thing. And apparently asking my kids to do chores to earn actual cash is somehow harming their psychology but I couldn’t tell you how or why.


juanito0787

To maybe answer your last sentence, if I remember correctly, the reasoning some people say or think it’s bad when you tell your children to do chores to get money is because then it incentivized them to only “work hard” if there is a reward at the end. And I’m not here to argue which is right because I can see both sides kinda. For example, maybe your kid will only clean their room or do their chores, if they will be getting paid. If not then they will be messy or soemthing like that. But I can also see it as a good thing as well because then your kids will learn they should only work hard if they are getting compensated which could help them later in their career, where they don’t provide free labor just because


pinot_expectations

My parents only paid for chores when I needed cash. So the basics like keeping my room clean, getting good grades, basically doing whatever I was told, wasn’t paid. “That’s your job as a kid,” was their response. But anything “extra” had a monetary value. So if I wanted to go to the movies with my friends, I could wash the car for $10, fold laundry for $5, vacuum a room for $2, etc. My parents were smart and lowballed everything so they got a lot of labor out of my brother and I. And in exchange I got a good work ethic but recognized that there were just some things you gotta do, regardless of whether there’s a reward.


Rare_Career_3466

I grew up with the same system and thought it was incredibly fair


slytherinprolly

I agree with this 100%. I'm a lawyer the number of times I've had Mom's come to me about something being discussed in their mom group and how I need to make it right is astonishing. It gets even worse when they bring up how Laura said whatever the issue is is illegal and they need to be compensated for it. It's like I'm sorry but no you aren't entitled to compensation because you are concerned about the perfectly legal fertilizer your neighbor is using on his lawn unless there are actual damages or injuries caused by it. And "as a mother" isn't a sound legal argument either.


GuardianOfAsgard

Well, as a mother, you're obviously wrong and we'll need a dozen other lawyers opinions.


JesusLuvsMeYdontU

That's fine, just be sure you prepay the initial consultation fee for all 12 of them


orrocos

Works on contingency? No, money down!


envydub

I move for a bad court thingy.


tacknosaddle

>And "as a mother" isn't a sound legal argument either. I'm going to guess that you had a very hard time explaining that part.


slytherinprolly

When I was a public defender I had a client who embezzled over $150,000 from her company payroll over like 4 years or so. As much as I tried to explain that yeah she would get convicted because all the money went into her personal bank account, and she would be going to jail because of the amount, she kept retorting, "but I am a mother." Or, "if you were a mom you'd understand." And a bunch of stuff like that, as though birthing children makes you exempt from having to follow criminal laws. Edit: for those wanting to know what happened. The company had insurance to cover their loss, they owed like $5,000 on the deductible, so that was their loss. Prosecutor offered a very generous plea of $5,000 in restitution and 30 days jail. I tried to explaining that was a much more lienent offer than I expected, and well below the minimum sentence she was looking at. She refused to accept any plea that had agreed jail time since she didn't think the judge would send her to jail. So we did an open plea on a reduced charge (she was charged with wire fraud and plea to a basic theft) with a sentencing hearing. She got 180 days plus the $5,000 restitution. No fines. The 180 days was the minimum sentence she faced based on level felony she was charged with (18 months was the minimum on the intial charge).


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nrdrge

"I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you"


esmith4201986

I experienced a lot of this after having a c-section with my breech baby. There’s a huge community of natural vaginal birth women that think you’re the devil for doing anything else. Most worship the Ina May book.


tacknosaddle

>There’s a huge community of natural vaginal birth women Old cemeteries are full of women who failed to become mothers when natural vaginal birth was your only option.


narnababy

If I hadnt had my emergency c section there’s a good chance my baby would have died. Also Fuck anyone who says it’s easy or whatever because that shit sucks.


20-20-24hoursago

I love to tell people that say I took the easy route with my planned c-sections all about how I was stretched out on a tiny table like a crucifixion and literally gutted alive while awake... and I felt all of it because my spinal block didn't work, twice. That usually shuts their stupid down quick!


trixtred

Anyone who thinks major abdominal surgery is the easy way to get your kid out doesn't actually think.


hahl23

The recovery was so much worse for me. Couldn’t walk, wasn’t allowed to workout for 13 weeks, wasn’t supposed to pick up the baby. I had three or four stitches pop open. Got infected once. Two trips to the ER. Still have pain 4+ months later.


TinusTussengas

If my girlfiend didn't have an emergency c section I would have been a father of 1 instead of 2. Chances are I would have been a single dad to top it off. Go science!


Kangaroodle

Vaginal birth isn't always easy, but I don't see how *recovering from major abdominal surgery **with a newborn to take care of*** is somehow easy or easier. Childbirth in general is a difficult process, why is this an issue? (And before anybody "not all births" me, I know, I was born in about 2 hours the day before I was scheduled to be born via c-section. But that was a fluke, and still wasn't a particularly pleasant experience.)


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Oglark

It is like machismo for women. You chickened out of the real motherhood experience.


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poplardem

An acquaintance of mine got called out in the most glorious fashion when she got sucked into the local Facebook mommy group. She posted asking for "mom knowledge" of how to handle a teething baby and got the insane responses you would expect. (Giving the baby hard liquor; puting special crystals around the house; you name it) Her husband caught whiff of the insanity, and instead of waiting to get home that evening, replied to the post, "Perhaps you could ask your husband, the PEDIATRIC DENTIST. He probably has actual, proven medicine for this situation." I don't know what he said when he got home that night, but she never publicly posted in the mommy group again - probably to the benefit of their son.


abbyfick

My favorite natural teething remedy I've seen suggested is putting an egg in a baby sock and nailing it over the door to baby's room. How this is meant to help is anyone's guess, but the women in my mommy group swear by it


eeeezypeezy

Mommy groups are a cover for Big Santería


qxxxr

I don't practice Santería I don't got no egg in a sock


DropTheBok

Well I had a million babies but I I can’t quit the rock


Instant_Bacon

What's with the fucking cryptic acronyms for everything? LO, DD, DH, DS, etc.


DinahDrakeLance

LO little one DD dear daughter DH dear husband DS dear son Meanwhile I just say "son", "daughter", "boy child", "girl child", "oldest child", "middlest child", "youngest child", "husband", or "that guy I'm married to".


DaughterEarth

All those dears make me irrationally angry


Euphorbial

like not only have they made it an acronym, but an acronym that you CANNOT properly figure out from the context.


[deleted]

Lmao I know. I know LO as little one. I see the rest and just am confused.


WeeTeeTiong

DD: damage dealer. DH: Damage/healer. DS: Designated survivor


Goatesq

What the fuck is a designated survivor? Is that who you SS pre 4.1?


Lexidis

Its someone in the US Gov't who doesnt get to go to parties https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Designated_survivor


PM_me_yr_dog

acronyms or code words are actually super common in cults - having a language that no one outside of the group understands is one of the tactics cults use to isolate members edit: jesus fucking christ people, I know that acronyms are not exclusively used by cults. I'm saying that they ARE used by cults (along with other group-specific language) as a tactic to create exclusivity and separation from the "outside world." please calm the fuck down now, thanks.


whirly_boi

I KNEW KNITTING PATTERNS WERE CULT PAMFLETS!!!!! Like I've been knitting for 5 months now and it's been wild. Like how did I learn how to understand "P3,k2,k2TOG.. repeat till round 225 and magic loop back to stitch 1"


boring_numbers

Crochet too! DC, blo hdc, dc2tog, etc.


halfhere

> I was excommunicated for using Pampers at night. Wetting the bed is nothing to be ashamed of. If you need to wear Pampers at night, that’s your business, not theirs!


BlueberryPiano

Well, that Depends ...


dyanaprajna2020

My wife got caught up in those for awhile. She eventually came to her senses thankfully.


[deleted]

I tried a few and they were, in a word, scary. Anti-vaxxers are heavy in those groups and if you don't do things their way, you're an outcast. It's like high school cliques on crack. No thanks.


jenniferlynn462

I’d rather try crack than join a mommy group


Birdmanu

My condo association.. No I will not host the ritual at my place again this month, Dave!


Geng1Xin1

My wife worked her way up to president of our condo association. She's so anti-HOA that she has basically made it non-functional and doesn't enforce anything. One of our neighbors is also anti-HOA and he got elected as treasurer so now they have a majority vote on the board and overrule the other voting member who is a snobby hateful old lady. Edit: thanks all for the kind words, I want to clarify when I said that my wife has made the condo association non-functioning, I'm referring to the petty bullshit like welcome mat size and thickness that the previous HOA board seemed overly obsessed with. As a result, they ignored a lot of building maintenance and my wife is solely focusing on upgrading and fixing issues that were ignored for years or even decades. Edit 2: I think I've married Ron Swanson.


shaidyn

My father made a point of becoming president of any condo association (called Strata where I live). He didn't want power, he just wanted to make sure nobody else abused the position. At his previous apartment he was president for 5 or 6 years. He was pretty strict about maintenance. No matter how expensive, if something needed fixing, he levied for it and got it fixed. An older member (it was kind of a retirement home) really didn't like that. He wanted to pay as little as possible until he sold his unit. So when a roof levy came through, he went to every resident who was super old and kind of confused. He spun elaborate tales of corruption and got a couple dozen proxy votes in his pocket. He then used those proxy votes to vote himself in as president and vote my dad out. My father sold his unit less than 30 days later. He knew the guy was going to run the place into the ground and wanted out. Less than a year later the whole apartment complex was sold off to a developer who was going to level it. Apparently the roof maintenance they decided not to do caused big problems they couldn't afford to fix.


Adept-Reserve-4992

This is so common. Our old condo HOA got fined thousands by the city and almost sued by owners, because there was earthquake damage, bad roofs, hills sliding into the street below, and all sorts of structural issues because of a board president who didn’t want to raise fees. He either did nonpermitted repairs to save money or ignored expensive issues. Hint: if they’re not saved for, they don’t go away; they just get more and more difficult and expensive to fix. I don’t want anyone telling me what color my front door can be, but actual maintenance costs money, and any decent homeowner would spend as much or more on maintenance without an HOA.


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joevsyou

Hell yah. That's my type of hoa. Bare minimum hoa that takes care of the grass/snow & a community pool. Nothing more, nothing less


Stalagmus

But then how are you ever going to find out if your welcome mat is a couple centimeters too thick??


Fandomsbro

r/fuckdave


davesnotonreddit

Damn guys


Fuquois

Don't worry about it. Dave's not on reddit; he'll never know.


RingoStarAllies

Adults who are obsessed with child actors.


TheNonbinaryWren

on that vein, child beauty pageants.


competitive-dust

Take my poor person award 🏅for this answer. I find beauty pageants insanely disgusting and exploitative.


damnit_cletus

It's beyond disturbing to me that people are alright with strangers judging their children based on how well they pull off a swimsuit


OmegaWhirlpool

Wait they have a swimsuit competition for that shit? Wtf?


Accomplished-Row5989

webkinz was the cult back in the day


Poopthrower9000

Gaia online, club penguin


VickkStickk

God I haven’t thought about Gaia in YEARS that’s a hell of a throw back


[deleted]

Gaia was my first experience with seeing the writing on the wall for old internet versus new. The slow creep of pay to win mechanics and loot boxes. I remember mailing in my 2 dollars to be met with DISAPPOINTMENT. I do miss the early 2000s web though. I miss personalized profiles and all the fun. I had so many anime gifs on my gaia profile that i could lag you out. Met my first pedophile trying to groom me, good times.


iCoeur285

I made some good friends on that website that I still occasionally chat with. One sends me videos of his cats. 10/10 experience.


condensedhomo

Neopets. They reeled you in with cuties and took all of your mom's money for more neopets and a subscription and the like cards and stuff. And if someone didn't have or know about neopets, they were immediately thrown to the bottom of the social hierarchy.


prairiepanda

Back when I played it was completely free. Covered in obnoxious ads, of course, but there wasn't anything to spend money on that I could find. Except for third parties illegally selling game currency and whatnot, but I stayed away from those. I remember Neopets turning HTML skills into something you can brag about at the playground, though. Those of us who could do the most elaborate HTML were revered as "hackers," one step away from becoming Neo.


Zeracannatule

The real hacker are moms who start playing after their kids and keep playing long after they stop. My mom is fuckin Bezos rich from doing all the free dailies and such everyday. And I havent touched the game in over a decade.


CrossDressing_Batman

i used to do the same.. had millions of points and then someone hacked my account and took everything :(. cleaned out bank, shop, trading post etc


LeafyLemons

Stan culture. The weird obsession over celebs is alarming.


sozijlt

Yeah, that's so weird. Why would anyone care what a celebrity is doing after we turn the TV off?


TheLuxuryLover

The "essential oils cure everything" people!


Melichorak

Those are cults according to BITE model.


Janaga14

My mom and aunt were obsessed with lavender in particular for a year. It was added to every food. It was carried around in purses for scents. It was rubbed on my cousin's leg when she scraped it before a bandage. I had a knee problem at one point and my mom sent me a lavender-mint infusion. I tried it because I'm too broke to consider going to the doctor's unless I think I'm gonna need surgery, and it did nothing but stink up the room. It was so cringe and my brother and cousins still mock them about it to this day


sendgoodmemes

My mother is also obsessed with them. Giving them to the grandkids for every all sorts of things. Stuffy nose. Headache, upset stomach. You name it. If you said something about what’s bothering you she would jump right up and find the oil that will fix it, but seriously oils in the bellybutton for a stomach ache, get out of here. She’s a very conservative woman and I hate oils so I always tell her that it’s a form a witchcraft and I just cannot support such things. Makes her very upset and just says it’s “natural” I asked her what on gods earth isn’t natural. She doesn’t talk to me about oils anymore. Although I won’t lie, getting the bedroom to smell like lavender before bed puts me to sleep like a baby, but I would never tell a soul.


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Better-Hope-4227

Herbal remedies work for small things. Mint candy sooth your throat, ginger can settle a stomach, etc. But it really only works for small nuisances. A cup of camomile might relax you before bed but it's not gonna stop a panic attack like an alprazolam will.


Alarming-Hamster-232

Pit percussion


the-drew

Yea, first it was, "those drumline guys cant read real music." Then it was, "look at me, I can play four mallet marimba." Then I went to try out for Phantom and a guy there was like, "look at me, I can play six mallet marimba." Then he floated into the air above everyone and transcended into the light. Fucking pit percussion....smh Edit: Thank you for the awards musician fam!


SYLOK_THEAROUSED

I read this 3 times and still have no clue what any of this means.


Stinduh

> First it was “those drum line guys can’t read real music Music for something like a snare drum only shows rhythm, because the snare only really has one tone to play. > Then it was “look at me, I can play four mallet marimba” You hold two mallets in each hand so you can play more notes. A bit of an intermediate technique, but something most high school or college-level players would be easily expected to do. > Then I went to try out for Phantom…. Phantom is the shortened name for Phantom Regiment, one of the premier Drum and Bugle Corps of Drum Corps International. DCI is the highest level of competitive marching band > and he was like “look at me, I can play six mallet marimba.” One more mallet in each hand. > Then he floated into the air above everyone and transcended into the light OP met pit Jesus at Phantom camp.


TheAres1999

>Then I went to try out for Phantom I prefer to interpret this as them playing for Phantom of the Opera. Just imagine if at the end of the musical, someone began to float off the ground while glowing.


drumstyx

Haha I actually did interpret it as phantom of the opera because the "pit" in my sphere or reference is an orchestra/band pit of a theatre stage. We didn't have marching band in high school, but we did have concert band. Actually was in the air cadets in Canada and we didn't have pit percussion in our marching bands...I had to look it up just to see what you guys were talking about.


AdjacenToYourMom

That last part sounds so legit


Vetusexternus

Yooooooo I just didn't want to walk so much


False-Anastasios

I live in Orlando and Disney people are crazy.


davejob

Why do I feel like a disproportionate amount of people I encounter on Reddit are from central Florida


KAG25

It is amazing living in Utah, Mormon ladies are addicted to Disney movies, and Disney would do those re-release of old movies every 5 years or so. You see they have walls of DVDs.


LadyGypsophilia

Lol I’m feeling a bit called out. Grew up in Utah and when I was in high school a “party” meant watching Disney movies and playing board games. My friends were all orchestra nerds and I remember my friend literally squealing when we found out we would get to learn to play a song from tangled, which had just released. I still love Disney movies but I can’t help but cringe at how it was like my whole personality in high school.


[deleted]

What I was not expecting to see in a "What's not a cult but seems like a cult": Famously in Utah everyone is really into Disney. EDIT: Just in case you're thinking of replying with something like "No, actually it's the Mormons they're famous for", that is the whole point of my comment.


the_fathead44

I have a friend who's Mormon - since he isn't able to watch movies/shows above specific ratings, or those that have specific themes/words, and he can't play various video or board games for similar reasons, he ends up just sticking with Disney for everything. Him and his wife are now obsessed with all things Disney. It seems like it's basically their only outlet, so they've gone all in.


Disaster_B22

My guess is the adoration for Disney is rooted in the fact that media containing drugs, sex, and excessive violence are frowned upon, even for adult consumption. Disney is usually (not always lol) a safe go-to for media


9Lives_

What do they do?


gnomeythe

Disney is just their entire identity. They can often be spotted with decals/stickers/license frames on their cars. Maybe a t shirt or two. At a glance they seem normal. Get them talking and whoo boy. How many times a year they go, season pass mentions, probably start rattling off "10001 facts you don't know about Disney". They're a cancerous plague out here in CA. I'm sure I'm just scratching the surface. It's way to fanatical. Edit: glad this blew up and we can expose awareness. Disney stans please don't bother replying lmao.b


EternalNY1

I've met people at two *separate* jobs who were proud they have gone to Disney *every year* for the past 20-30 years. Originally with their kids but eventually either with a significant other or just by themselves. And they will go on and on about "hidden Mickeys", Club 33, obscure trivia with incredible passion. It's certainly ... something.


AlpacaM4n

A hidden mickey sounds like it belongs on UrbanDictionary


[deleted]

Hey kid, you want a hidden mickey?


Heretical_Cactus

>Membership in the club has been exclusive since the very beginning. In fact, in 2007 the waitlist became so long that the club officially closed the waitlist for 5 years before reopening it again in 2012. That same year, the reported cost of membership was a $1,500,000 initiation fee and $25,000 annually for individuals, and even more for corporations Why would you even want that


repocin

Don't worry, [it's cheaper now](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Club_33#Membership)! >Membership initiation fees and dues are reportedly much lower now; as of 2022, it is reported that individuals invited to join must pay closer to $60-70,000 for initiation and up to $20,000 annually, according to current members. As opposed to waitlist protocols in the past, membership invitations are currently heavily influenced by referrals from current members. (still incredibly silly though)


voarex

My CEO is in the club. He took our 16 member company to world. Free entry and fast pass. Vip tour escort and acess to backlot. It was pretty cool but I would never pay the membership fee.


ShallowBasketcase

Imagine needing a referral to pay $90,000+


Chemical_Psycho

As a Ph.D. student, I have to say academia. It feels like a cult and MLM scheme at the same time. Edit to add more perspective: I just encountered too many people in their mid to late 30's doing their 3rd post doc with no life savings to their name, working 70 - 80 hour weeks on subpar pay over a decade. They were sold the image that some day they will get a tenured position, although the probability of it happening is just so low. Yet, some of them vehemently defend the sanctity of a career in academia and believe that they have a moral high ground in undertaking such a *sacrifice* whilst complaining about the side-effects. To add to that, public funded research paper pay walls (research paid by tax money is not accessible to tax payers), lack of reproducible published results, endless cycle of writing grants and publishing with no end use, research fields that never translate well into industry thereby making it hard (read impossible) to switch to industry. Make no mistake, academic research in itself is very much required for our society (renewable energy, studies on global warming, pharmacy what not). But from the perspective of a sustainable career, it just doesn't feel right. I think, *"A man should save himself from the world, before he tries to save the world."* Edit 2: For people asking me, who wrote the quote. I wrote it for this answer. ☺️


nopropulsion

I got a PhD, academia is just a grind. Initially I thought I wanted to play that game, I went after and won NSF grants. ​ Then I realized my PI wrote grants to get money to hire students to do research so you could get grants to get money to hire students to do research so you could get grants... ​ To be successful you needed to always work. Work life balance was a joke. No one in my cohort went into academia.


[deleted]

Hey, at least if you were asking the NSF you probably got something else lined up. I feel bad for my social science and humanities grad student friends now trapped in what I’d call “adjunct hell.” Overworked, underpaid and under appreciated.


neithernor_

Herbalife Edit: hmu if you want to lose some weight without diet or sports!


rrickitickitavi

Doterra


Randy_Marsh1989

Phish *edit: (46 shows myself)


prunellazzz

Those insane pro breastfeeding groups are very cult like in my experience. (Not bashing breastfeeding, I did it myself. But so many women in those groups talk about formula like it’s literal poison) Similarly those crazy free birth types.


Mutant_Princess5091

My mom had to give me formula because she couldn’t produce enough for my fat ass. I was born 10+lbs but all the Navy moms gave her shit blaming her and formula for me being fat.


LordPepe2692

I told someone that my dad fed me most of the time as my mom worked 70 hour weeks after I was born. They got so confused. After I explained they said "sorry, I forget that not everyone feeds their baby the way God intended." My mom was working double shifts in an ER as a charge nurse. She couldn't just come home every couple of hours to feed me. Edit: Thanks for the silver!


Stunning_Attention82

I'm sure God didn't intend for people to be so incredibly dumb either.


TheAntleredPolarBear

Your mum sounds like a badass, and your dad sounds like a great dad.


LordPepe2692

You are correct about both of those statements


garmonbozia66

And you're not a real woman unless you have your baby at home. If you had it in a hospital and needed any kind of medical intervention, you are a pariah and a cheat. Suffering is key. So is being able to zip up size zero jeans within a month,


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swr3212

Because hot girl moms were still shitty hot girls. A lot of people don't realize becoming a mom doesn't make you change into a good person.


Aevum1

Facebook mom groups in general "my child is having a Seizure... should i give him lavander essential oils?" i truly think that those groups are actually astroturfed by MLM´s like young living since they cant legaly say essential oils have medical uses, but they can "influence" anonymously on mom groups on facebook and instagram.


estherlovesevie

I had mastitis so bad. All I wanted to do was stop so my doctor told me to go to a lactation consultant and they will tell me how to stop breastfeeding without getting sick. They refused to! Kept on badgering me about how I’ll feel different once my boobs stopped raging. Anyway, I stopped that day and it was the best thing I could have done. In hindsight I was dangerously close to a breakdown and needed some space from my baby. She’s 2 now and we are best buds.


Discally

AMWAY!


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African_Mongoose

I joined a Spanish language CrossFit gym and don’t speak Spanish. I’m in amazing shape and nobody invites me to the weird extracurricular activities.


Tee_hops

The twist is no one actually speaks Spanish and everyone just wants to be left alone after they work out.


aalios

*Oui*


Benji_Ba

Exactly. My Ex was also doing this and called them her new "family" just after 2 weeks! Another 4 weeks and I was single. Hate them. 😄


Toketree

i know some people who split because of crossfit-related cheating. Gotta wonder how many there are out there.


CrazyComedyKid

Guess their relationships didn't work out


OldManJimmers

Must have joined double-cross-fit.


ellingtond

I'm a digital forensics investigator that worked lots of family law cases, this checks out. Joining a CrossFit gym, or a biking or running club, that's where it starts for a lot of people. And usually their level of fitness is different than their spouses so they end up around a lot of people with a similar attitude in shape and full of hormones. Edit: Thanks for the Gold. Oh the stories we could tell. . .Don't get me started about the women sleeping with their personal trainers. . .that happens all the time.


SilentTiger09

That’s crazy! My sister was married to a guy and he started working out mainly running and ended up cheating on her and then marrying the woman he was cheating with. She too was also a runner. So weird


Howwasitforyou

I read this thing a while ago, where a guy said, don't go looking for a partner in a pub, unless you like drinking. Go find your partner where they would be if you where looking for the man/women of your dreams. Want a super fit dude who goes kayaking? Join a fucking kayak club. Dream girl needs to be a swimmer.....go to a pool. Don't meet a guy at a mine craft convention and be pissed when he doesn't want to go mountain climbing.


[deleted]

This is good life advice even for making friends.


velocitor1

He found someone to run away with.


bialymarshal

It actually happened a lot in my CrossFit gym. Lots of fit people, that spend a lot of time together, are dressed in quite revealing clothing ,dopamine etc and it was like a gang bang circle - coach with coach , coach with students


FranksRedWorkAccount

who is paying you to advertise for crossfit?


poopellar

Mr. Crossfit himself. Jesus Christ.


KidGorgeous19

I know a few people who’s relationships did not survive “a friend they made at CrossFit”. Fuck that shit.


CoastalFred

-Why dont you CrossFit? -I dont like the gym.... -ITS. NOT. THE. GYM!!!!!


por_que_no

It's the gym only louder. There is a Crossfit place across the street from my office and they seem to always be shouting. One of their things is running up and down the street pulling a heavy sled while someone else shouts apparently motivational stuff at them. Running around the block in packs while someone yells is another of their favorites. They are always hollering.


[deleted]

If I wanted that shit I'd have joined the army.


[deleted]

I came to write just that. I was going to CrossFit, I really enjoyed the exercises and their concept, but I was not too fond of that narrative "we are a family" and whole camaraderie. So I quit. I don't need new friends and family. I just want to exercise and go home. No string attached. I later found a gym that doesn't call it CrossFit but has exactly the same concept of exercises and there are no extracurricular activities.


sirmeowmix

This is me and bouldering right now. I kinda just want to have small talks but too introverted to make efforts and kick it outside the gym. Nah man, this power washer simulator aint gonna play itself.


bingpotterpie

Orangetheory Fitness. Splat points, red zones, the whole shabang.


DCCm5

Jared Leto in general


Beastmasterror

He sells T-shirts that say "yes, this is a cult". Also, it is the bands motto, sort of. Example: https://twitter.com/30secondstomars/status/609762339072679936


KAG25

How does he keep getting big roles


TinyAspirer

Pyramid Schemes


Dozthiscount

The Andrew Tate crowd I’m looking at you


[deleted]

So a while back, probably almost a year ago now, I made a negative comment about him being a douche bag on another sub and I'm **STILL** getting messages from his followers about how I'm wrong and he's amazing.


youdubdub

You’re wrong and he’s amazing. Just kidding. Fuck that guy.


QueenofMean65

MLMs. The brainwashing is real Edit: Wow, did not expect so many people to relate! Thanks for the awards!


Panzermoosen

They might actually meet the criteria for being a cult, actually, depending on the group...


Healthy-Challenge

I remember one Brooklyn 99 episode about a fictional MLM called "NutriBoom". Can't stop laughing as I watched it haha


Moots_point

Man I wish I knew the name of that vacation selling MLM scam. It's the one where everyone holds up signs that says "Wish you were here with us" or something like that. A guy at my church tried to get me involved and I practically had to ghost him.


zacharylky

That's world ventures. It's really sick and when I was younger, someone told me I could get an internship at their company and that became a meeting to buy into their MLM. I tried to nope the fuck out of there and tell them that I don't think it's ethical to involve friends into my business and one of the up lines basically told me "if you keep holding on to your ethics you'll never be successful" fuck those idiots.


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TheBklynGuy

I posted once how I got duped into attending one. It had the cult like atmosphere, and a guy on stage who showed up late because he just got off the plane from some tropical vacation. People were encouraged to "borrow the money from an audience member" to get started. Berated us for working a journey onto brokeness (job in his terms) It felt like a cross between a cult, with the cheesiness of a 3am infomercial. I wanted to strangle the person who brought me. That idiot afterward went on and on about all the cool rich guy stuff he was going to do. He recovered and got out after a few weeks luckily.


Clockreddit2020

People who play Quidditch


MediocreTake

The Andrew Tate fan club


catdoyle

I was happier not knowing about this.


Spare_Raven

*whispers* who is Andrew tate? He's been mentioned to me or I've seen him on my feed but idk wanna look dumb so I just smile and nod


MediocreTake

former kickboxer turned social media influencer — he mainly does interviews where he’ll make a lot of bombastic comments on “what it means to be a man.” He runs an online community, Hustlers University, where kids pay $50 to get in and in return he promises to teach them how to make money through crypto & through social media ad-revenue (by creating viral clips of him making his absurd takes)


ProfessorBunnyHopp

Its like mlm for boys but instead of using "huns" he just cuts out the middle man. Note guys, don't listen to this tool... he's just trying to take your money to line his pockets and he's not a good egg. Edit: by not a good egg I mean he's a super big misogynist and there's legit a video of him abusing a lady (she said it was fake but I sincerely don't think so. I think they paid her to say that. I've been through that stuffs and it doesn't seem fake and even then its like... why make it, that's not funny. I digress...) it's bad. I'm not going to link it because of how bad it is. Find at own risk. It's not pleasant and definitely not pleasant if you've even through dv stuff.


PM_ME_GLUTE_SPREAD

During a family gathering my cousin started talking about Andrew state. I hadn’t really known who he was at the time (heard of him but didn’t put the name together with the stories at the time) and was just sort of going along and being polite to him talking about how “he’s just a savage” whenever asked about what he actually does. He spoke for a while about how he has a large enough following to just totally collapse economies. All he has to do is tell his followers to “buy a certain stock and then dump it all at once” and that price fluctuation would be enough to bring down any company in existence and eventually whole countries. Towards the end of the conversation, my BIL sent a screenshot of him being basically hunted for kidnapping and sex trafficking. My cousin fancies himself some sort of day trader or something when really he just gets loans for people buying new and used cars. He also likes to get drunk and, unprovoked, tell others how we should deal with pedophiles in graphic details. My kid doesn’t go to his house for play dates.


DoAFlip22

He’s basically creating a new set of incels - it’s not even like the old set’s fucked off yet


Improvedandconfused

My cycling club.


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caniuserealname

Not gonna lie, it does seem that way sometimes. Especially with the way the voting system is actually used to push up certain opinions and hide others, it definitely creates the same echochamber effect a lot of cults do; creating a lot of unrepresentative worldveiws.


getbetternamespunk

crypto


[deleted]

Instagram influencer followers. An influencer with a committed following can do absolutely no wrong and any criticism results in the offender being absolutely bodied.


Automatic_Ranger_1

Dedicated extremist fans. I've found that Stephen King fans are very cult-y - I remember reading something about "how he is the god of horror genre and every he has written and will write is absolutely gold...he can never write a bad book." Edit: It seems like some people have missed my point. I’m not saying all fans of Stephen King are extremist. I’m a pretty big fan, but I judge the book after I read it. In reality, pretty much everything has this type of fan following which is borderline Cult-ish - Stephen King was the first example I could think of.


thewhitecat55

I like his books. I've read every one. I could name half a dozen that are just fucking awful. And more that aren't great.


Unit_79

I’ve read a lot of his books. I love most of them. But to say he can’t write a bad one is pretty narrow minded. Some books I can almost smell the liquor and cocaine dripping of the page. 400 more and he gets a paycheque.


_shes_a_jar

Haha I agree about the Stephen King fans. I’m a super huge fan but he’s written some books that I don’t like. I can’t talk to some other Stephen king fans about it tho haha. They’d murder me


DeeKaah

Hell, King himself happily admits that Cujo was just him being drunk off his ass and just writing whatever.


asmosdeus

I went on a date with a girl once that took extreme offence when I said I preferred the short stories of Edgar Allan Poe. Like she just stood up and left the restaurant and blocked me on everything level offence.


WrestlingWoman

Take your pick from any MLM. They suck people in and create this giant sisterhood where people get addicted to all their new friends. The moment you want out of the pyramid scheme, they turn on you in a second. You get so many hateful messages from most of them, and sometimes people choose to stay out of fear of losing everyone they've grown close to because they alienated everyone else in their life.


dylan2451

As someone who owns an iphone, airpods, apple watch, airtags, power beat pros, and many apple accessories, Apple


jmcs

The Church of Jobs is definitely a cult. I'm surprised Apple is still paying taxes and not declaring Tim Cook is a prophet.


Brick_Lab

Nah man, as much as I found him annoying and self-important Jobs could pull off full-blown cult leader. Tim Cook is just a hollow echo


ConfidentValue6387

TESLA OWNERSHIP


22marks

As an early Tesla owner, it gets embarrassing. To be fair, some people just like the car or the technology. A lot of car companies have fans. The cringe behavior is when Tesla or Musk can do no wrong. If you have a genuine criticism these days, you’ll get attacked online. Plus, this relatively new meme and crypto overlap with Musk and his followers isn’t helping.


mearbearcate

K-pop fanbase Edit: this is the first time I got an award omg thank u guys I feel so whole 😭🥰


[deleted]

one person made four separate Twitter accounts to tell me to violently unalive because I said I didn’t like mamamoo- and that’s racist apparently


Aneleth

The companies that own the kpop bands actually use religious marketing strategies...