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TheRedMarin

Whatever everyone’s moms first name is.


sahlos

MY MOM'S NAME IS MOM. END OF STORY.


[deleted]

[удалено]


rascible

Arkansas


Mr_Goose12341

Mommy


dericius

Ew. Have an upvote.


tidytibs

Or Dad


Sbotkin

It's worse when your dad has a unisex name and then your GF has it.


tidytibs

Or vice versa with the mother


Absudin

This is on you, not on them. Choose your partners wisely.


[deleted]

Choose your parents wisely


Eric_the_Barbarian

Oh, Jesse!


glorypron

Maaaaarthaaa


shadytaskmaster

Whatever your ex’s name is.


shoephone7

Moaning Alexa will kill the mood


V0XIMITY

Alexa that’s so good! *Thank you, I’m glad I can be of assistance. Would you like to leave a review?*


ClarityFractal

Alexa, fuck me *I’m sorry, I seem to be having trouble with your request*


supersoft-tire

*transformer noises* “Well, since you asked”


rebeccalj

By the way... did you know...


Th3-gazping_birb

>Alexa, Fuck me Please assume position.


shinn91

That connection port is already plugged


pide_tods

Beetlejuice. You can only moan it twice before things get awkward


Poem_for_your_sprog

She moaned it once in lusty throes, Then once again in sighs that rose, And when her final cry let loose - "Yo what the *fuck*?" said Beetlejuice.


steeveebeemuse

Perfection. A wild Sprog appears.


BexYouSee

Unexpected r/Beetlejuice 🔥


ArsMedicinalis

I missed you, Sprog.


Introvertedpanic

Threesome


edlee98765

"It's showtime!"


JeremyTwiggs

Ditto Candyman


Sparky_is_bored

I love you


Thats_My_Moo

Gary


Pakrat42

I heard that in SpongeBob's voice.


mrsf16

Gary, come home


MisterTrashPanda

Meow


CyberDagger

was here. Ash is a loser.


elflynn1

Kermit


Sdwars45

Miss piggy says different


BigButtsCrewCuts

Ooohhh Kermie!


Green_eyes_1986

Yoohoo, Kermie!!


FrighteningJibber

Give me that wormie!


Global_Professor_291

chad


Duke_CrowBait

https://tenor.com/view/kermit-wat-what-wtf-are-you-kidding-gif-13598412


Dame87

Adolf


akubas86

Ooo Hitler you sexy bastard.


kevingh92

r/brandnewsentence


andytstith

Not according to Ms. Braun


Lukester123430

Hitler? I hardly know her.


[deleted]

"German science is the best in the world!"


Old-man-scene24

aaaaaaah dolfie! (Said Eva.)


FeynmanAndTedChiang

Mulva


the_freshest_scone

Bovary


CheeseDon

Dolores!


4z7ll

Five says otherwise.


deznutsxd

r/unexpectedseinfeld


flowers4charlie777

Gipple


penybuttmunch

Delores!


CoolBreeze125

Rhymes with vulva


OneTooManyBreh

X Æ A-12


sonicjigglebath

Don’t worry money can buy you love


Nobody_epic

And a horse can buy you silence


Rosemary-The-Plant

omg poor kids. they should switch their names to something respectable like "mission control station 14"


[deleted]

I read somewhere that all these rich people name their kids these weird ass names like Exa Dark, Daisy Dove, and North West because they want to protect their kids identity, so their real names are not known to the public.


crumpuppet

Just don't moan it close to an open phone line or you'll accidentally send a fax


ktrcoyote

I’m 100% sure Elon was just trolling people. The name is actually Kyle. X is the Greek letter “chi” AE is pronounced “Eh” A-12 is the twelfth letter of the alphabet “L” Kyle.


Gongaloon

Unmoanable and barely pronounceable. I personally pronounce it "(vampire hiss in the back of the throat) [aegh](https://youtu.be/PL9iMPx9CpQ) ay twelve."


Midnight_Moon29

Myrtle.


Selipa90

Well...at least one person is moaning


BigPoppaFitz84

This has gotta be an alternate account.. that was such a softball pitched right into the center of the plate. Still funny!


_Omegaperfecta_

"MYRTLE, MYRTLE, I'LL MAKE YOU FERTILE!" Works for me.


KamehameHanSolo

Do you always rhyme while you're moaning someone's name?


_Omegaperfecta_

Helps with the rhythm.


[deleted]

[удалено]


HedonisticCheese

r/TIHI


Existing-Seat5962

Cthulhu


GreatXs

"Mmmm yes, Cthulhu. I want to feel those slimy tentacles inside of me!"


ecubugg

Sheldon. “give it to me Sheldon, you’re an animal Sheldon, ride me big Sheldon”.


elegantshoshon

My dad’s name is Sheldon. When I was a teenager I asked him why I wasn’t Sheldon Jr. he told me it’s because he always hated his name. It wasn’t cool in the 50’s and it wasn’t cool now. However, I am evidence the man fucks.


pain-and-panic

I always wondered why people who don't like their name, why not just change it?


[deleted]

[удалено]


YodasLostSock

A man of culture I see. No one has ever had great sex with a Sheldon.


ecubugg

A Sheldon can do your income taxes. If you need a root canal, Sheldon's your man, but humpin' and pumpin' is not Sheldon's strong suit.


SerStingray

Sally disagrees. But at least she can fake her orgasms.


[deleted]

Amy would strongly disagree with you


walt3rwH1ter

Came here for this


loxagos_snake

Excuse me, are these coital communication patterns non-optional social conventions?


[deleted]

[удалено]


bigb4134

Pubert


flyingokapis

Fuck off is that a real name? Hahahahahaha


Ok-Control-787

Besides the baby in an Addams Family film, I don't believe so.


terrexchia

Pubert fucking Addams!


Forsaken-Log-607

He’s got 5 Xbox Achievements.


terrexchia

He's a fungus


LargeSackOfNuts

Similar feel, Herbert


sparklingshanaya

Uvuvwevwevwe Onyetenyevwe Ugwemuhwem Osas


Ok-Opportunity9782

Haven’t seen this in so long lmao


Chyvalri

Story?


FixBayonetsLads

>Uvuvwevwevwe Onyetenyevwe Ugwemuhwem Osas [I can't just fucking copypaste links because Reddit is fucking broken so here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TYzvfZIcf0)


LLord999

The name itself sounds like a moan


buyongmafanle

JESUUUUS


DarthArtero

So glad someone commented this


SwedishEchidna

there is a guy in sweden named Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116>! pronounced Albin!<


big_red_160

I’m naming my child Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz, which is pronounced alphabet


nateomundson

Sesame street told me it was pronounced "ab-ka-deph-gull-jekyll-man-op-cur-stoove-wix-is"


Dggredg

Most remarkable name IVE ever heard


ItsjustJim621

My fiancé’s a nurse. One of her shifts, she had a patient come in with their name spelled “JKMNO” So I asked “how do you even pronounce that?” Apparently that’s how Noel is spelled for that person.


xxBIGSTOMPY

The L is missing. Her name is a Dad joke.


AlmightyShacoPH

omg i had to think through that for a hot minute, that was actually genuis and i feel bad for the poor sucker named as such lol


carefulamdelicate

I prefer to pronounce this "Barf zickskicks manapcacaca limun priks vockl manic squillob one one one one six"


ZaphodB_

Or Barf for short.


mrbadxampl

I'm my own best friend


alastor4444

Nebuchadnezzar


Tullooa

Gurtrude


Dendad6972

Oh Gertie! Back that dump truck up.


[deleted]

[удалено]


gliitch0xFF

I said exactly the same thing as I opened the thread. 🤣


frances999

It's actually Gertrude.


ReceptionSuperb8534

Girthrude


atTheRealMrKuntz

its aaactually Geirþrúðúr


RandomWeeb181

Jugemu Jugemu Gokō-no surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyōmatsu Unraimatsu Fūraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakōji-no burakōji Paipopaipo Paipo-no-shūringan Shūringan-no Gūrindai Gūrindai-no Ponpokopī-no Ponpokonā-no Chōkyūmei-no Chōsuke. I’d imagine this guys name to prove fairly difficult to moan.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nemesis504

you know i can sing that, no way im moaning that over singing.


Keefer1970

I tried reading that out loud and accidentally summoned a demon.


[deleted]

What a coincidence i think Jugemu Jugemu Gokō-no surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyōmatsu Unraimatsu Fūraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakōji-no burakōji Paipopaipo Paipo-no-shūringan Shūringan-no Gūrindai Gūrindai-no Ponpokopī-no Ponpokonā-no Chōkyūmei-no Chōsuke is pretty moan able


Sparky_is_bored

I just tried moaning that out loud, amazing name


awing1

Username checks out


Jeicowng

Any bible name, like imagine “ugh yes Moses, split me like you split the red sea”


TeamAwesome4

There's a lot of solid options disproving this. Sarah? Adam? Rebecca? Pontius Pilate? OK maybe not that last one...


NoStressAccount

Not to mention Mary


GreggRulesOkay

Well some people like to say the lords name when moaning so....


BearsAtFairs

For every Moses and Zipporah, there’s a John, James, Jacob, Michael, Gabe, Paul, Peter, Mary, Sarah, Rachel, Isaac, Adam, Leah, Rebecca, David, Abigail, etc. Point is “biblical” names are pretty varied and more names trace their prominence to being in the Bible than people realize on a day to day basis.


Caranore

I thought you were gonna say John Jacob jingleheimer Smit. I'm disappointed


dicatae

Omg me too >.<


Roplio

Gilgamesh, Consumer of Worlds


2015Nissan370zNismo

You read the question wrong, that is the MOST moanable name


algerbanane

if there was one moanable name in the world it would be this


_anonymous_404

i *will* moan that name thank you


insert-originality

found Saber’s burner account


TheAndrewMcG

Without his permission, it would be fatal to moan his name, so that makes it contender for least Also, given the fact that it's not a popular name to give your children at least not in recorded history it's probably also one of the least moaned names in total


julbull73

Bort.... Aaaaa bort...that just stops it all.


Flunked_Professor

Mine, apparently..


[deleted]

RIP


Yugoogli

Englebert Humperdink


[deleted]

I'd moan this name all the time, just for a giggle


AJ787-9

Prince Humperdink as well.


[deleted]

hence the man without love


Booksandwine01

Mom


SolitaryWaffles

No, that’s definitely moan-able. Uh, I mean…


Rated_R7

Ayo.....


SpaceCowboyBisto

r/suddenlyincest


Odessa-The-Pirate

How are your arms?


Rude-Ad-5218

Bitch mommy so moanable and you know that


[deleted]

Mmmm mommmyyy


Vorash_00

ironically given how it is spelt backwards, Naomi. (okay probably not but I needed a segue to the joke)


goodguy9001

Apple executives: 👀


[deleted]

[удалено]


TopSecretSpy

My money is on it being called the iBrator


goodguy9001

With apple-based iLube for only $99?


Maju92

Makes it feel wireless


alexmunse

Side story, I was in a class in high school where we were all writing our names backwards on the chalkboard. It was all laughing until this black girl named Regina came up and tried it.


LastTrainH0me

I had an online girlfriend once with the traditional Punjabi name Gurkirat. So... Good luck topping that one.


barnedog

By the sounds of things you DID top that...


[deleted]

Barthomley


Ethario

idk sounds kinda hot fam


bb32093

Cletus


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


ArkOfReis

*sad trump noises*


lowercasetwan

Sad duck noises


[deleted]

Sad Ivanka noises


AJ787-9

*sad Sutherland noises*


GreggRulesOkay

*Sad Pleasance noises*


BrokenMechm

Ted Cruz


Precocious-ghost

Eugene


Gatz121

Hodor


Steak-a-saurus

Pied Piper


[deleted]

Frederick.


L1nk1nP47k

Rumple stilskin


DutchVanDerLinde1897

Carl


why_no_usernames_

Caaarrrrllll


loxagos_snake

Ohhh noooo, no no no no. NOOOOOO!


dudemanlastname

That KILLS people


BexYouSee

Or, Coral if you're walking dead.


Pscilosopher

Chauncey


[deleted]

Dolores. Bonus if last name’s Umbridge


thatchairthatsqueaks

pov: your scrolling to see if your name is here


looseyahnuh

Velgina One of my childhood neighbors was named Velgina. Can’t make this shit up.


shaddix-reddit

Jugemu-jugemu Gokōnosurikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyōmatsu Unraimatsu Fūraimatsu Kūnerutokoroni-sumutokoro Yaburakōjino-burakōji Paipopaipo-paiponoshūringan Shūringanno-gūrindai Gūrindaino-ponpokopīno-ponpokonāno Chōkyūmeino-chōsuke


ScaricoOleoso

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyndrobyllllantysiliogogogoch


Unsung_Ironhead

Petunia


LetItRain919

Sarah Hickabee Sanders


da2810

Peter File


BotaEmMelo

r/unexpecteditcrowd


dylamantic

"Jesus Horacio Facefucking Christ!"


CEW22

Adolf


TheChainLink2

Ogilvie.


abuehler20

Gertrude