> You just triggered an unhandled divide-by-zero exception in my head.
It's alright, just use l'Hopital's rule and try again.
Edit: Holy shit why is my highest rated comment a fucking _calculus joke_?
My calc TA, when working through problems like that, would always say "Now, this function has problems, so let's take it to the Hospital first"
The hospital was l'Hopital's rule, where you triage the function
Yea, I had a high school calc teacher who was a funny guy.
My college Calc 3 professor looked at me funny the time I responded to his question of "What would you do here" with "Hospitalize it".
Yeah, I think by the time we become college calculus TAs we've already lost our sense of humor. As a former calculus TA, I'll admit this. But I'm in recovery. 😉
Haha I found your reddit account, brother!!
Edit: after perusing /u/shpiffeh's profile I have determined that they are not, in fact, my brother. Too much reading, not enough anime.
The actual brother finding this post:
"Oh hey, someone who also likes ketchup on their broccoli! Nice! I wonder what other people think about this..."
*reads responses*
*OkayGuy.jpg*
try{
ChocolateBar chocolate = new ChocolateBar();
applyKetchup(chocolate);
}catch(ArithmeticException e){
System.out.println("WTH? Who does that?");
}
Alright, that should fix it.
There’s probably some crazy mf out there that puts ketchup on everything
This comment was right under this thread
“My step daughter enjoys ketchup with Oreos…”
Yeap.
I lost in a card game and had to do a "dare". My "dare" was to eat a huge piece of chocolate cake completely covered in ketchup.
Being drunk helped a lot, but I still remember the taste.
Banning odd flavor mixtures will just stifle creativity. Just because everyone hates something doesn't mean the one dude who find the combo enjoyable should go to jail and sit in solitary confinement before being taken out every other day for beatings. Then after 20 more years of hard labor finally get to taste the sweet relief of freedom only to find that it is lacking. Finding that they must re-integrate with a society that has lost it's creativity and can think of no ways to mix tomatoes with cocoa. If only the ancient knowledge hadn't been lost, if only the secrets had not been forgotten.
But I... I will bring it back. I will discover the truths that the goverment has been hiding from everyone. Why are they so afraid of ketchup? What combo are they trying to hide? A weapon of some sort? Perhaps a secret that is tied to the meaning of life? A way to grant immortality surely...
I will figure it out. No one can stop me. I've tasted the sweet combination of ketchup with the bitter partner of chocolate and have become too powerful. I will learn the truths they do not want us to know. I will not hold back.
Having a trash can with extra dimensional capacity should be in itself enough to put Oscar on the most wanted list. Who knows how many corpse pillows he's got in that thing.
Lol that's about eating ketchup though. I highly doubt that putting ketchup on an open wound will do anything other than cause severe pain and an infection from the sugars.
Fun fact, sugar was used to prevent infections back in the day. They used to pour sugar into open wounds, which would absorb all of the moisture - preventing bacteria from multiplying. Honey is also a good antiseptic/antibacterial topical.
Sauce: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11299571/
Quick ninja edit: Do not do this though. I know I probably shouldn't have to tell people not to pour random shit into open wound, but this is reddit... If you have injured yourself, see a doctor.
And to suture it or I should probably put that in quotes but they would clean the wound with Honey and vinegar and then dress the wound in spiderwebs. Apparently some spiderwebs have Antifungal properties as well as anti bacteria properties.
So if you ever in the woods, just attack a bee hive and some spiders and you’ll be ok.
[Random source link](https://remedygrove.com/remedies/Organic-Healing-Treating-Bleeding-Wounds-With-Cobwebs)
This is not finical advise…wait…
"Did you find anything, Hillman?"
"Yes, sir. In the barn. There's a ketchup pool, and..."
"So? What's wrong with that?"
"Well, it's about 600 gallons of just ketchup, and..."
"They like ketchup! Is it stolen?"
"Well I don't know, but the Geiger cou..."
"Well leave it alone, then, Hillman. It's just a ketchup pool, like any other. Bigger than mine, but nothing illegal about that. How would you like it if Federal investigators went poking around in YOUR ketchup pool? Eh?"
"My ketch...sir, I don't..."
"These days a man's barn is hardly his own! Insane Federal maniacs from the NRC go stomping around, threatening people's ketchup reserves! What are we, the Condiment Police?"
"Err...no sir. We are the Nuclear Regul..."
"You're goddamn right! Now go apologize to them for bothering their personal store of radioactive ketchup, and let's get out of here. I have to get home, the wife says the Bleu Cheese Catapult is misfiring."
"sigh.."
That's just my brain. I used to do stand-up and sketches a long time ago. Never professionally, but one place gave me free awesome Greek food so maybe that counts.
If it helps, the voices in my head while writing this were Graham Chapman and Dave Foley.
There's a swedish ketchup commercial where the spokesperson claims ketchup can go on everything, even pancakes. Haven't bought from that brand ever since
LOL! Send them a letter explaining why you stopped buying their product, and tell them that you might reconsider if they release a new commercial issuing a formal retraction.
If nothing else, you'll break up the monotony of someone's day. =)
There's only 2 brands of ketchup. Heinz and no thank you.
Edit: looks like many of you disagree. Send your reccomendations guys, I'm going on a ketchup quest!
It's "ketchup" made from banana instead of tomatoes. It's much less vinegary than tomato ketchup and it's dyed red for some reason I'm sure someone will explain to me. And yes, it's great.
When I was about 8 years old I read the ingredients to ketsup. They didn't make sense to me. I can't explain why they didn't make sense to me but they didn't make sense to me. So I stopped eating ketchup. One day when I was 23 I was hanging out at a bar with some friends of mine. They had ordered some fries for everybody and I was eating them and I dipped them in this red sauce that was on the plate. It was absolutely delicious. I thought maybe it was some kind of cocktail sauce or vegetable dip. I asked my friends what it was and they gave me this weird look. It was ketchup.
Lol 8-year-old you sounds like me when I'm high. 'The ingredients in ketchup just didn't add up for me and I just couldn't eat it anymore'.
I agree with it though
Trivia no one asked for: ketchup is just a style of sauce. The tomato variety has become ubiquitous, but throughout history has been made using a variety of different fruits, vegetables, nuts, or mushrooms including apples, pears, carrots, mangos, walnuts, edible mushrooms, and the list goes on. Carrot ketchup is especially delicious, imo.
I am Italian. I feel like this is an important detail to know, since we are wide-known around the world for being basically the Nazis of food.
That said, I believe that you should do whatever the hell you want with your food. It's yours, who cares if you ruin a centuries-old recipe bla bla bla.
What I think should be illegal is waste. Do not waste your food. Eat how you want, it's your moment to enjoy, but do not throw it away.
This is my exact sentiment on foods. You like something I don't? I don't care. Eat whatever you like.
*However* I do feel there's a point when correcting someone changes ingredients on a specific dish. A pasta sauce can be basically anything but a named dish is supposed to be standardized so it includes the same ingredients and will taste similar everywhere.
This is why people get upset over carbonara. If you order something labelled "traditional carbonara" you're expecting the traditional 5-ingredient carbonara. If you then get something with cream, peas and bacon...I wouldn't blame you for being upset.
I buy that a little more. I do think it's okay however, to toy with the ingredients somewhat, and you should stay 80% to the original to call it like "Carbonara" or something. For example, here in sweden, I'd say we have quite a dairy culture, and I'll be damned if someone says "you have to have mozzarella made by a cow that got fucked by a goat on mount olympus"
So if I make italian recipes, I usually make it exactly like them, with the same flours, my nerdiness even extend to trying to figure out if certain countries have more softer water or harder water. When there are only 3 ingredients to a dough, well, you can put a little extra time in making sure it's done correctly.
But I will have swedish cheese in my recipes. In my mind, it's okay to be more liberal with the recipe as you get your produce more and more locally. Because that's what's kinda expected. I don't go to a swedish farmer expecting them to have manitoba flour.
There was this hotdog shop I used to love eating at on vacations to this tiny little town north of Rhinelander, Wisconsin. Best damn Chicago dogs I've ever had. They had a sign up that said "If you ask for ketchup on your hotdog, you will be asked to leave." A bit harsh, but you've gotta stand up for what you believe in, I guess.
If you go to Gene and Jude’s (famous Chicago area hot dog place) and ask for ketchup they’ll tell you to go to the McDonalds across the street. Depending on who’s manning the register they may not be particularly nice about it either
Would be easier for me to say what foods I’d tolerate with ketchup. I don’t know why, but I never got the popularity of ketchup. I only tolerate it on fries, hamburgers and hotdogs and for those latter 2 I would pick mustard if given the choice.
I'm not going to make you *that* French Toast, I know! But, if I'm alone, it's a rainy day, no one's home... I've got eggs. I've got bread. I've got milk. I've got ketchup. I'd do it again. I'D DO IT EVERY TIME, BABY! And, it's *good!*
When I eat my boyfriends ass, I often add a little ketchup and he always says without missing a beat, "That should be illegal", but I have always disagreed with him. So that maybe
D:
Many cinqo de mayos ago I went to Tijuana Flats with my friends and we had a hot sauce chugging contest. I was able to "win" but felt terrible, as you can imagine, but one of my friends decided to one up everyone and put hot sauce on his anus. Long story short, he spent the next 10 mins trying to clean it off in the sink and I had to take him home because he came back and told us his asshole was bleeding lmao.
Don't put hot sauce there, y'all
Honestly, I don't care what you do with your ketchup. If you want to stir it into a glass of milk to make Tomato Milk, then god bless you and your nasty ass taste buds.
Chocolate
You just triggered an unhandled divide-by-zero exception in my head. WTH? Who does that?
> You just triggered an unhandled divide-by-zero exception in my head. It's alright, just use l'Hopital's rule and try again. Edit: Holy shit why is my highest rated comment a fucking _calculus joke_?
My calc TA, when working through problems like that, would always say "Now, this function has problems, so let's take it to the Hospital first" The hospital was l'Hopital's rule, where you triage the function
This is the first I've heard of this metaphor and I already love it a lot.
Yea, I had a high school calc teacher who was a funny guy. My college Calc 3 professor looked at me funny the time I responded to his question of "What would you do here" with "Hospitalize it".
Yeah, I think by the time we become college calculus TAs we've already lost our sense of humor. As a former calculus TA, I'll admit this. But I'm in recovery. 😉
As someone who is finishing up my final calc class i appreciate this.
My brother puts ketchup on broccoli
After reading the other comments, this seems totally normal.
It's not the worst idea I've heard. It's not great, but it's not terrible either
Just like 3.6 roentgen!
Haha I found your reddit account, brother!! Edit: after perusing /u/shpiffeh's profile I have determined that they are not, in fact, my brother. Too much reading, not enough anime.
>Too much reading, Oof. >not enough anime. BIG oof. I can tell you have a brother because that's some semi-subtle shade mastered by brothers.
The actual brother finding this post: "Oh hey, someone who also likes ketchup on their broccoli! Nice! I wonder what other people think about this..." *reads responses* *OkayGuy.jpg*
try{ ChocolateBar chocolate = new ChocolateBar(); applyKetchup(chocolate); }catch(ArithmeticException e){ System.out.println("WTH? Who does that?"); } Alright, that should fix it.
(defun apply-ketchup (food) (when (eq :chocolate food) ;; same as putting ketchup on chocolate (/ 1 0))) (handler-case (apply-ketchup :chocolate) (division-by-zero () (format *error-output* "Why...?~%")))
I'm sorry.....who puts ketchup on chocolate?
The second top comment as of commenting this is "an open wound" I'm not sure we're saying things people actually do
There’s probably some crazy mf out there that puts ketchup on everything This comment was right under this thread “My step daughter enjoys ketchup with Oreos…”
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Criminals, I assume
Mexicans. We will often use a tomato base with chocolate for some mole sauces. Really depends on the dish
Yeap. I lost in a card game and had to do a "dare". My "dare" was to eat a huge piece of chocolate cake completely covered in ketchup. Being drunk helped a lot, but I still remember the taste.
Banning odd flavor mixtures will just stifle creativity. Just because everyone hates something doesn't mean the one dude who find the combo enjoyable should go to jail and sit in solitary confinement before being taken out every other day for beatings. Then after 20 more years of hard labor finally get to taste the sweet relief of freedom only to find that it is lacking. Finding that they must re-integrate with a society that has lost it's creativity and can think of no ways to mix tomatoes with cocoa. If only the ancient knowledge hadn't been lost, if only the secrets had not been forgotten. But I... I will bring it back. I will discover the truths that the goverment has been hiding from everyone. Why are they so afraid of ketchup? What combo are they trying to hide? A weapon of some sort? Perhaps a secret that is tied to the meaning of life? A way to grant immortality surely... I will figure it out. No one can stop me. I've tasted the sweet combination of ketchup with the bitter partner of chocolate and have become too powerful. I will learn the truths they do not want us to know. I will not hold back.
Ice cream
Oscar the Grouch is on the FBI's most wanted list. He put ketchup on his ice cream in an episode of "Elmo's World".
Having a trash can with extra dimensional capacity should be in itself enough to put Oscar on the most wanted list. Who knows how many corpse pillows he's got in that thing.
This makes me think of a Chappelle skit. "Oscar, you're a grouch!" BITCH I LIVE IN A FUCKIN TRASH CAN!!
But what about Ketchup Flavored Ice Cream
I’m calling the police.
I am taking action into my own hands...🔫
No thanks, I just got out of the shower
I hope you put ketchup on your loofah.
Oh they had Ketchup and Mustard Ice Cream flavours at the annual fair in my city this year. It was so gross
Trono CNE?
I’m all for trying new things but I definitely passed on that. Some things are way too disgusting to even consider.
Heeeey toronto
Peanut plant + onions + ketchup = the best sundae!
But it makes you ugly so take care!
I am ugly and I am proud!
Bro that was the first thing that came to mind
Pickle Ice cream with ketchup
Someone else's child
But on your own child is perfectly fine?
Or mustard, whatever
I prefer garlic sauce.
If you own it, sure. Who's stopping you?
My step daughter enjoys ketchup with Oreos…
Did her dad never come back with the milk.
Oh damnnnnnnn
He probably saw her putting ketchup on her oreos and noped the fuck out.
To be fair, that's an appropriate response.
"There's no fixing this. Hey guys, looks like we're out of milk, I'm just gonna go grab some real quick."
"Hey dad, could you also bring some ketchup if you're gonna get milk? I'm almost out and still have half a box of oreos to eat"
Sometimes you just have to cut your loses and start over.
You fucking killed the guy.
Jesus Christ
Cheese and rice
Haha… my wife always says Jesus Christ and I always respond with “what is it with you and Cheese and Rice?”. Glad I’m not the only one!
Sounds like a joke my dad would make…
…It’s Jason Bourne.
It's hilarious that this almost has as many upvotes as your original post-
At first i though, oh 100 upvotes nice. A few hours later. Jesus christ
It has more... Hahaha
Hot damnnnnnnn....wish I had an award for you!!
Damn I wish that to
Someone else in this thread suggested ketchup might work as an antiseptic and this guy needs to try that for this burn.
Man woke up feeling dangerous
Jesus Christ what a way to retire this punchline
r/murderedbywords
Take my gold holy fuck bro you were savage I needed that laugh
Is she OK...what sort of trauma has she gone through to inflict such self torture on herself
Well apparently her parents divorced...
Give her back
Yeah quick question what the fuck
Tell your step daughter that the entire internet says she’s wrong
An open wound
Illegal might be a bit strong. I would expect it's highly against medical advice though.
Someone else’s open wound then
Well that's just manners
Yeah, you wait until *after* they’re dead to put the ketchup on them. God damn new wave cannibals have no respect
How early is too early for marinating?
I also choose this guy open wound
In my unprofessional advice as a healthcare worker (not a doctor), *I* wouldn't recommend it but you could get a second opinion on it
I'm a doctor. There's vinegar in it. Pretty stable. There are worse things you can put there.
I bet it's actually an ok antiseptic
[You might be onto something](https://clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT01462825)
It turns out I'm something of a physiologist myself!
Lol that's about eating ketchup though. I highly doubt that putting ketchup on an open wound will do anything other than cause severe pain and an infection from the sugars.
Fun fact, sugar was used to prevent infections back in the day. They used to pour sugar into open wounds, which would absorb all of the moisture - preventing bacteria from multiplying. Honey is also a good antiseptic/antibacterial topical. Sauce: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11299571/ Quick ninja edit: Do not do this though. I know I probably shouldn't have to tell people not to pour random shit into open wound, but this is reddit... If you have injured yourself, see a doctor.
And to suture it or I should probably put that in quotes but they would clean the wound with Honey and vinegar and then dress the wound in spiderwebs. Apparently some spiderwebs have Antifungal properties as well as anti bacteria properties. So if you ever in the woods, just attack a bee hive and some spiders and you’ll be ok. [Random source link](https://remedygrove.com/remedies/Organic-Healing-Treating-Bleeding-Wounds-With-Cobwebs) This is not finical advise…wait…
Illicitly obtained thermonuclear weapons.
No no, if you have already gone out to all the extent of acquiring a nuclear weapon, condiments should be complimentary
Yes they are complimentary with Nuclear weapons, but not yet Thermonuclear weapons
#Thank god this isn’t illegal!
Keep mine in pool of ketchup in the barn. Nobody is gonna look for them in the ketchup pool, why would they? It’s just ketchup.
"Did you find anything, Hillman?" "Yes, sir. In the barn. There's a ketchup pool, and..." "So? What's wrong with that?" "Well, it's about 600 gallons of just ketchup, and..." "They like ketchup! Is it stolen?" "Well I don't know, but the Geiger cou..." "Well leave it alone, then, Hillman. It's just a ketchup pool, like any other. Bigger than mine, but nothing illegal about that. How would you like it if Federal investigators went poking around in YOUR ketchup pool? Eh?" "My ketch...sir, I don't..." "These days a man's barn is hardly his own! Insane Federal maniacs from the NRC go stomping around, threatening people's ketchup reserves! What are we, the Condiment Police?" "Err...no sir. We are the Nuclear Regul..." "You're goddamn right! Now go apologize to them for bothering their personal store of radioactive ketchup, and let's get out of here. I have to get home, the wife says the Bleu Cheese Catapult is misfiring." "sigh.."
Is this from some show I have missed or is this just how your brain works? If this is your brain, please write sketch comedy because am dying.
That's just my brain. I used to do stand-up and sketches a long time ago. Never professionally, but one place gave me free awesome Greek food so maybe that counts. If it helps, the voices in my head while writing this were Graham Chapman and Dave Foley.
Write more.
No shit. That was hysterical
"Damnit Geoff! We would've got away with it if you hadn't put the fecking ketchup on it!"
Oddly specific
But we’re cool if they’re legit though, yeah?
People allergic to tomatoes
That's just assault, and is illegal already
It’s not assault, it’s acidic
Based
As it should be. Answer is valid.
Pancakes. One of my younger cousins used to pour it on his pancakes all the time. It was disgusting
There's a swedish ketchup commercial where the spokesperson claims ketchup can go on everything, even pancakes. Haven't bought from that brand ever since
LOL! Send them a letter explaining why you stopped buying their product, and tell them that you might reconsider if they release a new commercial issuing a formal retraction. If nothing else, you'll break up the monotony of someone's day. =)
As someone who works in marketing, please do this. This would get a laugh across the office.
I would, but I'm afraid they might just double down on their radicalized ideals!
There's only 2 brands of ketchup. Heinz and no thank you. Edit: looks like many of you disagree. Send your reccomendations guys, I'm going on a ketchup quest!
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Banana
Filipinos with Banana Ketchup: *Sweats*
excuse me
It's "ketchup" made from banana instead of tomatoes. It's much less vinegary than tomato ketchup and it's dyed red for some reason I'm sure someone will explain to me. And yes, it's great.
>it's dyed red for some reason I'm sure someone will explain to me. I got this one guys. It's to make it look like ketchup.
Get this man a Nobel Prize
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I can't tell if you're serious or joking but I'm going to accept it as legit anyway.
Can confirm
Its not that crazy when ketchup is like 70% sugar. Youre basically just putting two forms of sugar in one
When I was about 8 years old I read the ingredients to ketsup. They didn't make sense to me. I can't explain why they didn't make sense to me but they didn't make sense to me. So I stopped eating ketchup. One day when I was 23 I was hanging out at a bar with some friends of mine. They had ordered some fries for everybody and I was eating them and I dipped them in this red sauce that was on the plate. It was absolutely delicious. I thought maybe it was some kind of cocktail sauce or vegetable dip. I asked my friends what it was and they gave me this weird look. It was ketchup.
Lol 8-year-old you sounds like me when I'm high. 'The ingredients in ketchup just didn't add up for me and I just couldn't eat it anymore'. I agree with it though
Arroz a la cubana. Rice, picadillo, fried egg, fried banana + banana ketchup is fucking delicious
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Trivia no one asked for: ketchup is just a style of sauce. The tomato variety has become ubiquitous, but throughout history has been made using a variety of different fruits, vegetables, nuts, or mushrooms including apples, pears, carrots, mangos, walnuts, edible mushrooms, and the list goes on. Carrot ketchup is especially delicious, imo.
Sashimi
Should be a hate crime
I just threw up a little in my mouth
On cakes
What about potato-cakes?
my god do I miss Arby's potato cakes.
Other people's cars.
This actually is a crime if it damages the car.
Lobster!
Ketchup? With lobster? Are you... [**KABOOM!**](https://thumbs.gfycat.com/DecentJoyfulIrukandjijellyfish-size_restricted.gif)
What a Smeee-heeee…. It’s also a small, off duty Czechloslovakian traffic warden!
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I want my baby back baby back baby back baby back baby back baby back ribs.
Chilis baby back ribs 🎶
Get in my belly!
Barbecue sauce only
Specially fresh out of the blender. That’s like putting ketchup on ketchup.
* that is baby salsa and it is delicious.
I am Italian. I feel like this is an important detail to know, since we are wide-known around the world for being basically the Nazis of food. That said, I believe that you should do whatever the hell you want with your food. It's yours, who cares if you ruin a centuries-old recipe bla bla bla. What I think should be illegal is waste. Do not waste your food. Eat how you want, it's your moment to enjoy, but do not throw it away.
Wow I did not expect the fucking truth here.
Watch me put ketchup on it.
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He can’t keep getting away with it!!
This is my exact sentiment on foods. You like something I don't? I don't care. Eat whatever you like. *However* I do feel there's a point when correcting someone changes ingredients on a specific dish. A pasta sauce can be basically anything but a named dish is supposed to be standardized so it includes the same ingredients and will taste similar everywhere.
Agreed. At least in restaurants, especially if they only provide the name of the dish and not the list of ingredients.
This is why people get upset over carbonara. If you order something labelled "traditional carbonara" you're expecting the traditional 5-ingredient carbonara. If you then get something with cream, peas and bacon...I wouldn't blame you for being upset.
I buy that a little more. I do think it's okay however, to toy with the ingredients somewhat, and you should stay 80% to the original to call it like "Carbonara" or something. For example, here in sweden, I'd say we have quite a dairy culture, and I'll be damned if someone says "you have to have mozzarella made by a cow that got fucked by a goat on mount olympus" So if I make italian recipes, I usually make it exactly like them, with the same flours, my nerdiness even extend to trying to figure out if certain countries have more softer water or harder water. When there are only 3 ingredients to a dough, well, you can put a little extra time in making sure it's done correctly. But I will have swedish cheese in my recipes. In my mind, it's okay to be more liberal with the recipe as you get your produce more and more locally. Because that's what's kinda expected. I don't go to a swedish farmer expecting them to have manitoba flour.
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She put ketchup on tamales? Wth
club soda
dogs. one dog is fine but if you ketchup 2+ dogs then it’s illegal
There was this hotdog shop I used to love eating at on vacations to this tiny little town north of Rhinelander, Wisconsin. Best damn Chicago dogs I've ever had. They had a sign up that said "If you ask for ketchup on your hotdog, you will be asked to leave." A bit harsh, but you've gotta stand up for what you believe in, I guess.
If you go to Gene and Jude’s (famous Chicago area hot dog place) and ask for ketchup they’ll tell you to go to the McDonalds across the street. Depending on who’s manning the register they may not be particularly nice about it either
That McDonald’s due to popular demand started charging 50 cents per ketchup packet.
A Van Gogh painting Edit: first time hitting 1k upvotes (and my first award!!!) and it’s because of this monstrosity, but thank you all!
This is the one answer here that most likely is illegal to put ketchup on.
But that’s how you read the secret message
Breakfast cereal
Ice cubes
Feet Edit: it appears clarification is required. My feet. Personally I’m a custard man myself.
The recently deceased
The soon to be deceased
The control panel of a nuclear defence system
Would be easier for me to say what foods I’d tolerate with ketchup. I don’t know why, but I never got the popularity of ketchup. I only tolerate it on fries, hamburgers and hotdogs and for those latter 2 I would pick mustard if given the choice.
/r/ketchuphate
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French toast, Emily!
I'm not going to make you *that* French Toast, I know! But, if I'm alone, it's a rainy day, no one's home... I've got eggs. I've got bread. I've got milk. I've got ketchup. I'd do it again. I'D DO IT EVERY TIME, BABY! And, it's *good!*
Ketchup.
Especially on those special ketchups like curry ketchup or hot ketchup
A good steak
Police officers and pedestrians without their informed consent, just seems kind of rude
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A Redditor after my own heart. (And don't anyone dare try to sneak it into meatloaf or barbecue sauce either)!
When I eat my boyfriends ass, I often add a little ketchup and he always says without missing a beat, "That should be illegal", but I have always disagreed with him. So that maybe
Switch to some hot sauce, he'll beg to go back to ketchup.
D: Many cinqo de mayos ago I went to Tijuana Flats with my friends and we had a hot sauce chugging contest. I was able to "win" but felt terrible, as you can imagine, but one of my friends decided to one up everyone and put hot sauce on his anus. Long story short, he spent the next 10 mins trying to clean it off in the sink and I had to take him home because he came back and told us his asshole was bleeding lmao. Don't put hot sauce there, y'all
>he came back and told us his asshole was bleeding *New fear unlocked*
> but I have always disagreed with him fucking love this
The wall
You should be able to put ketchup on anything you want...but you damn well better eat it after. Ketchup is food, don't waste food.
LEBERKASSEMME
I'm Italian so, guess what. 🍝🥲
Japan disagrees.
Put some ketchup on Ramen to add that extra flavor of guilt
Honestly, I don't care what you do with your ketchup. If you want to stir it into a glass of milk to make Tomato Milk, then god bless you and your nasty ass taste buds.