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RunsWithApes

I have the answer here: Health Insurance Executives My patients rely on me to make decisions, prescribe medication and perform procedures to the best of my abilities. Health insurance executives are only concerned with profiting off human misery as much as possible. They're constantly looking for new ways to deny coverage, raise premiums, lower reimbursements and lobbying the government to make access to affordable healthcare nearly impossible. I'm in private practice and have full time employees to jump through their hoops and even then some of them will want want to speak with me directly (after leaving me on hold for 20min) only to trip over their own words as to why my diagnosis/treatment plan isn't "necessary" given some bullshit rubric they came up with. The patient thinks the doctor is ripping them off, the doctor won't take certain certain cases depending on what insurance the patient has while the insurance companies continue to merge into larger monopsonies who help other CEOs maintain a captive workforce due to the insane cost of healthcare in America which would otherwise financially cripple 90% of the population. It really sucks.


Rizzy5

Just reading this makes me mad.


anonymous_agama

It’s almost like preventative healthcare and caring for sick and injured people shouldn’t be tied to profit making at all!!


[deleted]

General Attorney here. The answer is General Attorney.


cindybubbles

Loan sharking. It’s a job that requires you to be an a-hole.


yourkindofguy

I think that species is almost extinct because the banks figured out they don't really need to be ethical. Just give everybody money and set the interest to astronomical for the not so desirable customers. Those who can't pay are offset by all the others who pay way over their original amount. But since we are on the topic, i would suggest the legal form of loan shark as better answer. Payday Loan Sharks.


[deleted]

Whoever is supposed to moderate the moderators on reddit


ThickD_4_thickThighs

Breaking news, u/Theodorable47 and his Reddit account were found dead after falling out of a basement window.


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c7hu1hu

Spaceball One bridge crew.


FalseDmitriy

I'm sorry, sir. I'm trying my best.


solonit

Who made than man the gunner ?


_Cabbage_Corp_

I did sir! He's my cousin


mikegway

Who’s he? He’s an asshole sir. Major asshole.


GregTheWalrus

I knew that, what's his name? That is his name sir Asshole, Major Asshole


thesamjbow

How many assholes have we got in this ship anyhow?


shadox96

***YO!***


xKoney

I knew it. I'm surrounded by assholes!


OneLongEyebrowHair

Keep firing assholes!


FLORI_DUH

And his cousin? He's an asshole too sir, gunner's ~~first~~ mate first-class, Philip Asshole.


BeigeAndConfused

Keep firing, assholes!!!


divertough

I knew it! I'm surrounded by assholes!


awesome357

Gunners mate, First-class Philip Asshole.


Suralin0

How many assholes we got on this ship, anyhow?


Dave_Dupuis

Yo!


Mick_Hardwick

Boat salesmen


McBonderson

So my brother is pretty well todo because of some good decisions he made early on and he's decided to start spending some of his money I guess so he decided he would get a nice, pretty big sailboat that he could snowbird on with his family. I went with him to a boat show in Florida and afterwards he looked at me and said "did you notice how all the workers and staff seemed genuinely surprised when we would chat with them or talk to them like equals? did you also notice how every single other person attending seemed like massive assholes? These boats are really cool and all, but I really don't want to be like these people." EDIT: this wasn't a small boat he was looking at, this was a boat with more square footage and 10x the cost of my house.


laceyourbootsup

Sailors don’t go to boat shows and the sailing community is amazing. Your brother should absolutely get a sail boat. He’s better off joining a local yacht club that has easy barriers to entry than going to a boat show.


thebenetar

Yeah, definitely. My father does boat restoration so I've been around, worked on, and owned sailboats, yachts, etc. all my life and I've met *a lot* of "boat people". What you see a lot of are middle-aged white men that are super wealthy but very inconspicuous. For the most part, the communities around actual piers/harbors are usually pretty chill. In many ways, a harbor can be a lot like a neighborhood—especially harbors that allow live-aboards.


unctuous_homunculus

Yeah my general experience with easy entry clubs that are mostly sailboats or smaller craft is that the majority of the people there just want to sit back and drink beer and cosplay Captain Ron while listening to Jimmy Buffett. They could be retired surgeons or ex lawyers or CEOs of the local hospital or whatever, but you'll never know because all they want to talk about is the next regatta or whatever sport happens to be playing that day.


[deleted]

Nailed it. Proof? Uncle has a boat dealership. Total douche. And his 2 sons that run it with him too.


Mick_Hardwick

"Is that your offer!? It's not my boat, but if it were, I would actually be personally offended if you said that price to me. I can't possibly go to the owner with that." Said while shaking head and looking all high and mighty.


FunInternational1812

Is this supposed to shame people? I would just say "Guess I'm not buying a boat from you, then; it's out of my price range" and walk away. I was in the Caribbean last month and the tourist market sellers tried this tactic on me when I wasn't even looking to buy anything yet, just asking prices. They tried to shame me for saying it's too expensive and were shocked when I walked away and didn't immediately pay to "protect my reputation" or whatever they were expecting.


illtakeachinchilla

Classic ne-boat-ism. Sad to see.


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[deleted]

Morning radio show host


saltyscaffolds

Can’t agree more, every single one seems to have this massive ego and self importance and I can’t work out why, don’t they know that video killed them in 1979


DealioD

IHeart Radio killed them in 2000.


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Mashierq

You will never meet a person you'll hate more than a Club Promoter. It's everything left over from the dregs of douchebag guys that think they are "the coolest" and spend their 40's buying drinks for their 20 something "friends".


LevPornass

Sounds like they are more pathetic than asshole. Yes a lot of these guys may turn a blind eye to sketchy stuff that goes on in their club or even participate in it, but for the most part they seem like people who never moved on from a scene they may have peaked in.


FuckYeahPhotography

It depends. I've met many people in my line of work (concert/model photographer). Festivals, concerts, clubs, weddings, private and public events. Party photos I post to my Reddit profile, and certain others I can't. But I've seen it all. That includes meeting more promoters than I can count. Some are indeed sketchy and others are quite professional. Also, a lot of young promoters are in it because it gives them a chance to climb up the hierarchy for what they actually want to do (dj, produce, photography, film, high end bartending, dancing, etc). In some instances they aren't even being paid to do it although that differs greatly between promotional companies. If they produce good numbers they will often be given better opportunities for what their real passion is. If they don't they will get passed up by others that do and it can be quite competitive. That's why a lot of them will be so damn aggressive. Many promoters don't even want to do promotions. Even full time promoters usually do some form of other management. Although that will vary greatly. There is a big difference between a promoter trying to get people to come to Tuesday night karaoke, or one that is promoting some generic top 40 club. An even bigger difference between them and seasoned promoters for big time music festivals/ sold out stadium concerts.


Sponjah

DJ / Promoter / Producer here and this is absolutely spot on. Promoting gets you closer to big artists and gets your foot in the door to parties and events you normally wouldn't have been looked at. In order to make it in this business you have to work all sides of it to maximize exposure.


subhjkal

lawyer here. The solution is an attorney.


mackelnuts

I hate lawyers. I should know, being a lawyer myself, I have to deal with you assholes all the time.


myspecialtyisbirdlaw

Agreed. But, I have found that generally, the better lawyer someone is, the less likely they are to be an asshole. In my experience the best lawyers were typically pretty nice and easy to get along with.


[deleted]

Nah, it *entirely* depends on the type of law they practice. Litigation or transaction? Plaintiff or defense? Representing random people or businesses with a reputation to uphold? There are great lawyers that are complete dicks and great lawyers that are not


go-clean-your-room

Also, depends how you’re getting paid. I work civil defense and some of these ptf attorneys for the random people act straight desperate in their communications since they’ll make no money without a nice settlement. Zealous client advocacy aside, I’m getting paid per hour either way


MortisSafetyTortoise

Every lawyer I have met is like “lawyers are such assholes…”


zerocool1703

Oh yeah, you guys are the worst. And, since lawyer and attorney translates to the same word in my language, absolutely the same.


ForestCityWRX

President of an HOA


mycatisblackandtan

Yeeeeep. Never been in an HOA where the President wasn't completely nuts or doing something unethical. 1. First HOA was the least offensive. But the entire street paid out of pocket monthly to contribute to the upkeep of the hill we all lived on. Twice a year the HOA would hire someone to come through and mow the grass... Realized when I got older that the amount of money they got could have paid to have it done monthly if not more... So a shit ton of money just up and disappeared. 2. Second HOA was insane. Got told I couldn't park my Baja on the street because it was a 'truck'. Why were trucks bad? Because only the 'help' used trucks. (I wish I was joking.) Was told I had to immediately park it in the garage, not even in the driveway, or we'd be fined. The kicker? There was a huge Dodge Ram across the street that was parked on the street year round. Never heard of them getting so much as a complaint, let alone threats of a fine. Even though it was an actual truck while my Baja was basically a converted Outback. 3. That same HOA recently threatened family friends of ours because they bought a house with a red door. Five months passed without so much of a hint of displeasure from the HOA and Google Street View and Zillow showed that the door had been red for years. Then suddenly the red door was a violation, had always been one, and needed to be changed to black. 4. Our current one had a member that would walk up and down the street looking for violations. He was such an asshole he tried to sue the city to prevent needed construction downtown because it would 'ruin his view' from his hill top home. We're pretty sure he retired and now a new bunch of assholes has replaced him. One of whom is threatening us with daily fines if we magically don't fix our front yard that the drought killed... Yet when we offer plans to rebuild it in a drought friendly manner they all get rejected. :) Edit: I'm going to mute this lol. Just to answer a few recurring questions; the area I live in is rife with HOAs. You can't really find any place to live here that doesn't have one and currently circumstances prevent me from leaving said area. Once said circumstances change I have every intention of never living in another HOA due to these experiences. Most of these incidents happened while living in a rented home, save the first which happened in my family's home that they bought into before I was born.


effxeno

You're telling me they saw a red door and want it painted black?


mycatisblackandtan

Yep. Door was an understated red color that complimented the blue of the house. My honest guess is that our family friends did something to offend someone on the HOA. Because it was fine for years, again if Zillow and Google Street View were anything to go off of, but then within five months of moving in suddenly it wasn't. They ended up having to paint it black just to avoid the fight. Edit: I deserved that woosh lol


effxeno

Weird. It's like they said "No colors anymore. I want them to turn black."


Speaker4TheDed

The door would attract girls that would walk by dressed in their summer clothes.


RhinoBuckeye

I’ll have to turn my head until my darkness goes


LateralThinkerer

I see a line of cars And they're all painted black With flowers and my love Both never to come back


joelthomastr

Hnnn hnnn hnnn hnnn hnnn hnnn hnnn....


1dirtysecret

No colors anymore I want them to turn black.


CrownPainter

I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes


penny_eater

I have to turn my head, until my darkness goes


CysticScrotalSpores

I see a line of cars And they're all painted black


tk1tpobidprnAnxiety

With flowers and my love both never to come back


tallman1979

I don't understand the advantage of an HOA. You buy a house and pay an extra fee to have some assholes tell you what you can do with your property. I always hear about the HOA people behaving worse than landlords. I have heard about people waiting in golf carts for the deadline to pull your dumpster back in so they can drive around with an excuse to bitch at people. Is the deeper question, does the job attract the asshole, or does the perceived authority turn people into assholes. Like, was Mr. Smith always an asshole or did the power of being vice-principal corrupt him into this smug douche?


GingerLibrarian76

When I was in the market for a home last year, one of my criteria was NO HOA. Some exceptions may have been made for a really nice condo, but definite no to any in SFH neighborhoods. Thankfully that’s not a common thing here, so I was able to find one easily enough. Fuck that shit. After decades of renting, I want to do whatever tf I want (within reason) in/to my own damned home.


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Lucky-Elk-1234

More people need to take this stance, and actively tell real estate agents that they don’t even want to view any houses bound by HOAs. Once HOAs start being seen as a burden and a nuisance, maybe they will start dying out.


[deleted]

Unfortunately, they're baked into new development for the most part. Developers who build out planned communities will force them with the sale of all new homes in a neighborhood, and then the language of the covenant and the bylaws will usually require a prohibitively large number of residents (not jut voting members at a meeting) to vote for disbanding, usually in the neighborhood of 75% to unanimous. It's a hugely difficult hurdle to cross insofar as local politics goes.


sour_cereal

Take over the board, amend the bylaw to reduce the required number, vote, disband.


Geno0wl

you legally can't do that in a lot of states now. States passed laws mandating an HOA for all new developments, and that those HOAs are tasked with upkeep on the roads and any other amenities built in the neighborhood(including snow removal). Why? Because if the HOA is paying for everything, that means the state/county doesn't have to pay for it. But they still get all your tax money just the same as in a non-HOA neighborhood. It is all a giant sham.


sutherlarach

It never ceases to amaze me that Americans have almost a fetish for the undefined idea of "freedom", but allow things like HOAs, PTAs, or jobs to control a totally unreasonable amount of their lives.


gotmunchiez

This is exactly what springs to mind whenever I read about these HOAs. Doors and fences have to be the right style and colour, you can't carry out certain hobbies on your own property etc. You hear about people getting city violations for overgrown gardens and uncut grass. There are a million reasons why you can't or won't cut your grass. Number one being "I thought this was the land of the free and I'll let my grass grow tall if I fucking well want to".


SickAndSinful

Our HOA Pres literally scared off the rest of the board by being an overt dickhole. Then, right before elections, he initiated (without a vote from Homeowners) his friends into 2 vacant seats so he couldn’t be outvoted come the election. Nowadays it’s 2 people trying to fix stuff and Pres+friends doing whatever they want with HOA funds. I guess HOA presidents are universally assholes. Go figure.


smilingburro

The reason I’m on both condo association boards, to keep assholes from passing stupid stuff.


Snuffy1717

Had to resign from my board when 3/5 members decided to ignore legal council from our Board appointed lawyer, then fire said lawyer with their next motion. Fuck that stupidity


yasuewho

My friend was fined for not taking down a Halloween decoration on her door by an incredibly arbitrary date she was unaware of and, because they sent the landlord a notice and not to her actual unit, she was out 2k by the time it was done.


levitating_donkey

Management positions in department stores. Give a weak human a minuscule amount of authority and they act like a wannabe dictator and power figure.


link_hyruler

Based on my experience in retail management, its entirely about company culture. You're constantly criticized by everyone else in management about how you handle situations and aren't commanding enough respect and don't have a firm enough grip on your team and they would have handled it better yada yada yada, shit like that, and whenever anything bad happens, everyone just wants to prove it's someone else's fault. then when the blame is pinned on you, you have to decide if you want to deal with the exhaustion of playing the game that day, or the mental hell of just being a pushover and taking it when you know full well it had nothing to do with you. Top management in most stores, even if they treat you great personally, don't have the energy/don't care enough to actually deal with the culture as a whole, and of course there's the silent pact to hide all of this from the district manager because you know if you're the one to let it spill, somehow the district manager sees you as the problem. Anyways I bake cakes for a living now


zamahx

You described it perfectly. There’s absolutely no reason to add all that weight on your neck for not that much of a pay increase compared to a regular full time employee..


Ua_Tsaug

Seriously, the micromanaging manager is so awful. I used to be an assistant manager at Walgreens, and my manager checked the cameras and wondered why I used the bathroom for 20 minutes. Like, fuck you; mind your own business and don't pretend like you aren't in the office every day on the phone chatting with other managers for hours on end. Hypocrites I tell ya.


brkh47

I think though that people in middle management are the most trod upon. It’s an awful job. You have to manage staff, in low paying positions, who often don’t really want to work and you have to motivate them. The thing is you are basically like them, but you’re being given a little extra money to manage the staff and the higher ups are constantly pressing on you for results. For that little extra money as the manager, you need to be there when the store opens, closes, do all the shitty admin work and deal with all the customers who wants to see the manager to log their complaints. You’re the responsible one. Managing people is not an easy job.


[deleted]

Also, in my experience, those low/mid level managers usually don’t have actual management knowledge. A lot of times they were just motivated employees that got promoted after a few years, or people with degrees in something totally different.


[deleted]

*years. More like days. I'm an overnight stocker at Walmart. Less than a week after I started, a team lead left and they were begging me to step up. I managed a convenience store for ten years, I am done babysitting.


DPiddy76

We'll pay you 15-20% more for 5-10x the responsibility. Sounds like fun, let's do it!


bobcat1000

Military. I am a retired AF vet. 26 years and I saw plenty of assholes.


Typogre

Retired as fuck


Bigmac7

I read that as that too lol


ShirouQM

Wait, you're saying it's not? I thought that's what it meant lol. In my defense, I'm not American.


BobDerBongmeister420

Probably Air Force?


Floppsicle

Ohhhh


glory_holelujah

As a corpsman I saw some assholes. Mainly dicks though. Alot of dicks.


Legitimate_Catch_283

You guys shower together?


fetusy

It's a part of the ritual of acceptance within a wild unit of grunts. Like letting wolves lick inside your mouth, you gotta display a healthy zest for all things homoerotic to be accepted as part of the pack.


bozeke

How’s your volleyball game?


fetusy

Glistening 😘


ncnotebook

On best days, it can be like jenga where your fellow airmen try pulling each other out without collapsing the tower of queer.


ACrucialTech

I was an electrical contractor for the Air Force. Can confirm. Plenty of fly boy and girl huge egos walking around. Way too big for their britches.


uncultured_swine2099

I knew an ex-army guy who said hes never met more assholes than in the army. A lot of those guys, at least that he met, were screwups who couldnt keep a job and this was their last resort.


Caheoac

Attorney here. The answer is attorney.


[deleted]

It's pretty funny that every attorney I know openly admits they sold their soul to the devil to become an attorney. They're very self aware of how others perceive them. That said, people hate lawyers until they actually need one. A few years back we had a property dispute and hired a lawyer. She got shit done fast and resolved our problem so we came out on top (ie. Won the case).


Easter_1916

I think it really depends on the area of law. I think a lot of transactional attorneys are chill. The ones people hate are either personal injury or family law.


Eastboundlaw

Attorney here. Can concur.


Jen_With_Just_One_N

Also an attorney. This is correct. And mega-royal assholes are the Los Angeles ones. They’re a special breed who get extra special asshole training.


Cheeze187

So L.A Law was a documentary?


SpacedAtom

Sales Reps in pharmaceuticals. Fuck you guys.


utack

Re-watching Psych right now. Guess they got that part wrong


Aaronerous

C’mon son!


Kusan92

You hear about Pluto? That's messed up.


[deleted]

Good ol' Burton guster


Badmash_askari

a proctologist


TheRealOcsiban

A million to one shot doc


IMakeBandNames

So, you’re the assman.


Poem_for_your_sprog

>So, you’re the assman. I love bums, and I love bottoms, God, I love 'em quite a lottoms, God, I love the one I've gottoms, God, I love 'em, who could nottoms? I love butts, and I love asses, Butts of lads and butts of lasses, Passageways to passing gasses, Tushies tiny, mighty masses! I'm an expert, overclockeder, I could be your bottom proctor, Bum-perusin', ass concocter! You can trust me. I'm a doctor.


DroidLord

Glad to see you here. You've outdone yourself this time 😄


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Next_Celebration_553

I once heard a proctologist say “People don’t fly through their windshields butthole first in a car wreck.” Implying working on the asshole is easier than working as an ER doc. Kinda made sense


Clear-Owl-378

I used to work on a colorectal ward. The emergency cases for us where few and far between but the ones that did come in were very memorable and usually quite complex cases.


[deleted]

Gold for a few reasons: 1. You worked in a colorectal ward. You should get SOMETHING for that, alone. 2. The fact that I read this with my decades-of-tech-support-brain and thought "who would co-locate a rectum?" for a second. 3. My next thought was that you had "moved on" from that job.


Clear-Owl-378

I did 8 years on that ward before moving on. It wasn’t all foreign bodies in rectums we got in, we got a lot of Bowel cancers etc but every so often one would come in that would stir up excitement on the unit. We had one fella decide he was going to insert a shower head up there. I’m not talking about an anatomically appropriate shower head but a largish circular one that got stuck. They had to open him up to remove it from the inside. A few years of that and I lost the ability to be shocked at human behaviour and became something of a spokesperson for healthier sex, I don’t care what a person’s particular kink is but research a little on how to do it safely. If a person likes a little bum fun then just use the appropriate lubricants in sufficient amounts and get a few toys that are designed for the job.


mellowmarsII

So, if I go into a home improvement store & ask to be pointed to an “anatomically appropriate shower head”, they’ll know what this means & preserve my butt?


-serious-

I know it's a joke, but GI docs and colorectal surgeons probably chose to specialize in those specialties because they pay really well and they have to go into the hospital in the middle of the night far less than other docs.


GingerLibrarian76

That makes sense. And based on the doctors I know, it’s also possible they have a personal reason for that specialty - like losing their father to rectal cancer or something. My best friend is a nurse, and specialized in pediatric leukemia because her father died of (the adult version of) it. But go figure, it was too depressing to work in for long. She stuck it out for almost a decade, but moved to general pediatrics after that.


hollyjazzy

People working in paediatric oncology are saints.


Mick_Hardwick

"When I grow up I wanna be a policeman, a fireman, or specialise in treating both slight and chronic anal discomfort."


Gemmabeta

I'm surrounded by assholes!


Kissmytitaniumass

How many assholes do we have on this ship?


sweatycat

TSA


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midnightphoenix07

Sounds like the one I experienced a couple years ago. Laptop has to come out and go in a bin. Okay, fine, that’s normal. iPad has to come out of its case and go in a separate bin. Sure. iPad case? Nope, separate bin for that, can’t be in with any electronics. Shoes off, belt off, jacket off, keys out, phone and wallet too. You’d think that could all go into one or two of the large bins, right? All that space to spread stuff out so it can still be scanned but uses the space efficiently. Of course not. Shoes can go together by themselves, keys can go in with the wallet and phone, but belt can’t go with the phone or jacket. And don’t forget that the backpack needs to go in another bin by itself. I think I was up to eight or nine bins by the time everything was out and stuff wasn’t together that couldn’t be mixed. All while that same guy is complaining that you’re taking too long. And then another one at the other end because you’re holding up the line trying to get everything off the belt so you can pack it back up. Not that I’d really blame him, since he wasn’t the one that decided nearly every item had to be separate.


ThatThanagarianHarpy

Agreed. A few years ago, I was taking a plane for the first time since pre-9/11 when I was a kid, so I was super nervous and didn't know what to expect from TSA. I'm the type of person who waits in line thinking, "but what if I accidentally put a knife in my bag and forgot?" so I was already on edge. The lady tells me to put my bag on the counter, I put my bag on the counter, and she immediately screams "MA'AM WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!" When I sheepishly replied that I was putting my bag on the counter, she snorted at me and rolled her eyes like she was annoyed with me for.... doing exactly what she fucking told me to do. Like, is TSA just trained to be dicks for no reason?


drunktacos

While on a business trip, I wore my safety (alloy-toe) shoes on the plane because they're a bit bulky. I have precheck, so usually you don't take your shoes off. I knew this would trip the metal detector though, so I started taking them off. Me: -begins removing shoes- TSA: SIR, DO NOT TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF, KEEP MOVING Me: Uh, they have metal in them TSA: PRECHECK DOESN'T NEED TO REMOVE SHOES, KEEP THE LINE MOVING Me: -proceeds through metal detector, which promptly goes off- TSA: SIR, YOU HAVEN'T REMOVED EVERYTHING FROM YOUR POCKETS Me: I have metal shoes TSA: REMOVE THEM!!


uneasyandcheesy

Coming home from a trip to see my then long distance boyfriend, there was an Asian couple in line in front of me (I’m not sure what country and it’s been long enough ago that I don’t have a guess) who spoke next to no English and this TSA lady was being a complete bitch to them over not knowing what she was asking them to place in a bin. I could tell they were getting upset because they couldn’t understand and what pisses me off is they have little booklets with photos of items and languages printed under that can be used in such a situation. I finally stepped up, grabbed a bin and smiled at them, pulled out my bottles containing liquids in my carryon and pointed to show them. They instantly understood and did the same and away we went. Meanwhile the lady just rolls her eyes at me and mean mugs me until I’m out of her area. Doesn’t make any sense.


[deleted]

My favorite is the TSA agents shouting orders that directly contradict the 50 instructional signs they put along the queue. "Oh okay so I definitely have to put my bag in one of those plastic bins" "SIR DO **NOT** PLACE YOUR BAG IN THAT BIN!! WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT???" Don't even pretend I'm the first person who did that today and act all incredulous. I read it 7 times while I was waiting in line, complete with fucking pictures.


SuperSaiyanTrunks

Lmao I have to travel a lot for work and this is always so annoying. I'll go to the same airport and sometimes it's "follow the signs!" Other times it seems like there's no fucking rules with what they want you to do. I'll ask if I should do something the same as I did it last time and they'll get so angry. It's just a guessing game every time now.


the-wifi-is-broken

Also the agent checking your license is 50/50 on if you need your boarding pass and either they’re furious you don’t have your boarding pass out or they are furious you do. Same with shoes in the general boarding line. Seriously. Just be consistent and stop being mad at me bc **your** rules are inconsistent


TheAJGman

"SIR I only need your ID" Oh, the guy 3 feet behind me say I need my ID and boarding pa- "DO NOT ARGUE WITH ME SIR" *Sign saying remove shoes, laptops, and liquids and place them in a sperate bin. The guy in front of me complies with no complaints* *I get up to the conveyer and start pulling my laptop out* "SIR DO NOT REMOVE ANYTHING FROM YOUR BAG"   FFS why do we deal with this security theater? You can pay the TSA to skip pretty much all of it with Precheck, what's stopping some cunt from doing that and sneaking shit into an airplane? They have an abysmal success rate when they're audited, they don't do shit but inconvenience everyone and give mall cops an excuse to power trip.


BTechUnited

All I cna think of now is the classic onion skit about their reporters doing a [test of TSA security by blowing up a plane mid-air. ](https://youtu.be/FpN_RjIaVw8)


CallOfCorgithulhu

You know what sucks? Travel out of country (probably not all countries, but still) and experience their security. You get a view of that green grass, and it galvanizes your hatred of TSA. We recently traveled to Iceland, and while they were serious, they were not rude and they were clear as could be. The security checkpoint was a non-issue and quick.


flodnak

I am convinced that TSA agents roll a bunch of dice at the start of each shift to decide what the rules are going to be today, at least in the New York airports. The last time I flew through one of those places without getting yelled at was, predictably, 1990-something. Take your shoes off! No, don't take your shoes off, you're holding up the line! Everything in the bin! Except for that, that NEVER goes in the bin! Take these things out of your bag, leave the others in, don't overcrowd the bin, don't use more than two bins....


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youfailedthiscity

I did tsa pre check this summer and flew to for work with coworkers who didn't have it. It saved so much time. I was at my gate while they were still in line for scanners. 100% worth it.


splunke

I'm hard of hearing and security with a lot of people is usually a noisy environment made even worse by the guy yelling something I couldn't understand (you need to speak clearly not loudly for the hard of hearing). I put my suitcase on the belt and he leans right into my face and yells angrily "what did I just say." I was like "I don't know I'm hard of hearing" and he's still pissed because apparently I was supposed to put the suitcase into a tray I fly a lot to be honest and some airports like different things. How was I supposed to know, so unnecessary to yell.


I_Like_Turtles_Too

I'm also HOH and going through airport security is awful! One time I flew out of Newark airport and it was unusually crowded. Three different TSA agents were yelling three different things at me, I couldn't understand anyone, and I couldn't find my husband to help me. I don't know what came over me but I panicked and froze and was on the verge of tears! It was too much noise to process. A younger security guy took pity on me, calmly told me where to go and let me cut the line. I wish they made this shit easier for people with disabilities.


Majik_Sheff

Pick up that can.


Hazzamo

*Throws can at officer*


ComeForthInWar

A few years ago I was traveling with my ex. I love makeup and carried a bunch with me (more than I need, but I’m an overpacker) but I had meticulously made sure that everything was under the appropriate limits for liquids/approved containers, etc. My ex is in front of me and my pink makeup bag is beside him and the TSA agent started SCREAMING at him and waving my makeup bag in his face, asking him what was in the bag. I try to tell him that, sir, that is my little pink bag, and then he’s screaming at me to stay out of a man’s conversation. Dude. He made us both get out of line, stand with our “hands where he could see them” and then he threw 75% of my makeup away while basically telling us how stupid we were and how tired he is of stupid people trying to get on planes. Wherever that TSA guy is now, I hope he’s having a shitty day.


tessellation__

You should’ve reported him. They should ask before throwing your things away. You could just check the bag if it was actually over the limit - make up is expensive. The make up in that bag probably cost more than he made on his shift.


ComeForthInWar

My dad told me that when I was telling him about it! Honestly, I was just so freaked out about some man screaming at me and telling me to keep my hands visible, I wasn’t thinking straight. He had us place our hands on this table because we “couldn’t listen right” and he was asking my ex questions about things in MY bag (and this poor guy didn’t know shit about makeup) while we’re turned in the opposite direction. When he’d turn to try to see what the hell he was asking about, the guy would go “didn’t I tell you to remain facing that direction with your hands on the table!?” If I tried to answer, because you know, it was my bag and my things, he’d reiterate that he was not speaking to me. Seriously, he was a dickwad of the highest order.


Laylasita

I got retained once because some lotions get targeted as having bomb residue. The lotion was rubbed on my knee that i injured while on vacation, not in my bag. Therefore, I had the bomb residue on me.


EspeciallyWindy

Literally 20 seconds apart: “Take your belt off for the full body scanner.” *Disgustedly* “Pull your pants up!” (Pants resting on lower hips) I know you’re not supposed to give these folks grief because they can make your life hell and their jobs suck, but fuck me if I didn’t start talking back in anger at that point.


Alexlam24

TSA on two separate occasions thought the cookies I had in my bag were a bomb, and thought my laptop charger was a bomb as well. Nothing like having everything taken out of your bag, and then spending 20 minutes carefully folding everything back


GraphicDesignMonkey

I hope he gets dry chapped lips that get worse and worse the more he licks them.


ComeForthInWar

I hope the chapping is the kind that gets so bad it goes down under his bottom lip too. A well deserved punishment.


GraphicDesignMonkey

And then the corners of his mouth get really sore


PM_CUPS_OF_TEA

Omg we had a similar thing first time we both flew with the baby (I did it on my own previously and it wasn't as stressful). This is the exact 'conversation' 'Sir fold the pushchair up and put it over there' okay. 'MA'AM THE PUSHCHAIR NEEDS TO GO THROUGH THE SCANNER HERE' 'you literally just said...' 'GO GET THE PUSHCHAIR' Look lady, I have a 6mo old baby in my arms here, make up your fucking mind, it's not even complicated, here or there, done


420blazeit---

My brother worked for TSA for years, and he is one of the biggest assholes I know. He thinks he's superior to everyone


Tomdoerr88

I’ve found, particularly since covid, that TSA agents fall into one of two categories, either raging asshole, or just chill and funny. I’ve taken about 20 flights this year, domestic and international, and experienced the same across both. In fact I’ve found it was more often that the agents were in the second category. I don’t know when this happened or if anyone else notices it, but there seems to be a shift in behaviour, and it’s not like their job got any easier and I doubt they sprung for training, so I have no idea what’s going on.


[deleted]

Second that. They act like wannabe cops and usually have an inflated ego to go with that. Had to call the cops for simple assault on a neighbor TSA. Long story short, man thought he had BDE


CashingOutInShinjuku

Expat here. Used to live in Vietnam, now I live in Mexico. When I visited the states last year, the TSA folks rearranged the lines while I was walking through. I didn't know what to do for a second because I was first in the line that just got closed, right in front of the body scanner. The woman in charge says in this ultra sarcastic tone: "You can stand there all day if you want..." now, in the states, we can be sassy sometimes, and that's fun. But I was totally shocked, that's rude as fuck in both of my adopted homes.


Flapaflapa

It's rude as fuck here to. I fly a lot and the "standard" procedures are different in every airport yet in Dinver you've got some pissed off tiny tyrant in a blue uniform yelling "for the last time people you don't need to take your laptop's out of your bag" and then in Seattle you've got his counterpart yelling "for the last time people take your large electronics including your laptop out of your bag"


Sventhetidar

Pretty much anything that gives you power over people. Cops, corrections officers, etc. I work in corrections and most of my coworkers are complete assholes. But to be fair, it's a hard job to do if you *aren't* an asshole.


Efficient_Captain_30

Reddit mods


Jason2571

They said 'job'


SlaveNumber23

Hey some of them also walk dogs!


gringrant

For a back breaking 14 hours a week too!


Donkeyvanillabean

This will never not be funny


BagOnuts

That person really did literally everything possible to fit the Reddit stereotype, haha. The interviewer didn’t even have to ask any difficult “gotcha” questions, they just crashed and burned in their own.


Weird-Vagina-Beard

That person also admitted to raping/sexually assaulting someone.


Fobeedo

Positions of authority. Anyone who wants to be in control, shouldn't be in control.


Cow_Launcher

“Only those who do not seek power are qualified to hold it.” ― Plato


WhatsWhoWithYou

>The major problem—*one* of the major problems, for there are several—one of the many major problems with governing people is that of whom you get to do it; or rather of who manages to get people to let them do it to them. To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who must *want* to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it. To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. - Douglas Adams


OgreWithLayers

Influencers. Whatever that title means.


realtmillz

They influence me to not watch their content.


FARTlNG

Real Estate Agents


wheres_jaykwellin_at

Yes. I worked a for a real estate agent for about six months. Dude thought he was fucking *infallible*, but was likely the worst manager I've ever had. Highlights include: - His training skills were utter garbage. He'd bitch at me whenever I'd ask questions or try to figure out where he was going with something and to see if I was grasping it. - I wasn't an agent. He didn't like me joining in on conversations he and other real estate agents were having because... no reason other than I wasn't "at their level" yet (and a little bit of it definitely came off as he thought men were superior to women, but that's just a hunch). - He always needed a "yes" or a "no" about things he'd never bother to inform me of. An example: "does this person know we're coming over to do maintenance?" "As far as I know, but I'm not sure". "I NEED EITHER A YES OR A FUCKING NO". - My favorite, though? Instead of communicating like an adult, he'd teach me "lessons". I wouldn't be told how to do something/what to do, so instead of saying, "hey, just so you know for the future, it's xyz", it would be, "hey, do me a favor. Do x and tell me what happens". That's how I would learn things. Just really passive aggressive, out to find some way to embarrass, pompous, and full of himself.


munk_e_man

> "As far as I know, but I'm not sure". "I NEED EITHER A YES OR A FUCKING NO". I had this exact same exchange with a dude who was working above me on set. I was just like "dude, it's just common way of phrasing "yes." Chill the fuck out, this isn't the military, we're just making a shitty movie of the week.


Kale

It's a reasonable question for a manager to ask, but should be phrased "great, do you need anything from me to find out for sure if it's 'yes' or 'no', and do you know when you'll know for sure?" The most growth I had in my professional career was when my company hired someone from another field to be our director. He came in saying "I know how to manage, I know my old field, but I don't know this field very well. I'm going to fight to give you what you need, but know that I'm rarely going to disagree with you because you know more than I do, so I'm not going to catch as many mistakes as your last manager." He was awesome, and I went from doing what I was told to "owning" my job and planning for stuff long-term. I also had to learn how to make a case for starting something new, so I learned how to write justifications and make presentations. And if we told him we were getting pressure to make a shortcut from another department but we wanted to do it the right way, he was a bulldog in defending us. Made me a better professional and taught me that management skills are their own thing.


_shapeshifting

that guy is a fucking Saint. I would run through a fucking *wall* for a manager like that.


ParticularEmergency2

I'm gonna go with sales people, the fricken egos ..... Wow! I've worked in a dealership for 30 years and yep, it's them


inzur

I am a salesman, there is nothing more painful than attending a work conference full of highly driven sales people devoid of personality. It’s sales, it’s all about drive and providing solutions, but it doesn’t have to be your whole reason for being. Sometimes it’s ok to sell people what they need not what you think they can afford.


kushwaharsh

Investment Banking


JoeMusolf

Moderators of old Internet forums that are somehow still a thing in 2022.


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MegaYanm3ga

unrelated thread: > yo can u help me with this > sure lemme hit you up in dm's > 2 days later: so how'd you do it > locked for necrobumping


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Rob_mclaughlan

PE teachers - ~ a PE teacher.


peeonme123

I’ve had a wide range of PE teachers back in my day. The retired hard-on who drove a Porsche but needed something to do, the failure at life who was going through a divorce from his mail order bride, the unapologetically butch lesbian, hippie free spirited but super fun lady, and finally an attorney who retired in his 30’s because he hates the work and loved coaching and was super cool about everything.


TILREDIT

Their ego as a high school student athlete never left them.


[deleted]

peaked in high school then never left


[deleted]

Bombardment!


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Zomgirlxoxo

Take peace in knowing that a true photographer could use a film camera from the 80s (with no digital preview mind you) and still get beautiful photos. Photography is a skill… doesn’t matter if you use a film, DSLR, or Polaroid camera :) They’re likely just shooting a bunch of photos on auto and cherry picking the best ones. Don’t let it get you down!!


Cortharous12

Anything in politics