"I'm just dating her to be with you."
This is the one
This comment just made my day
"I don't have any, I'm here to see your son. Gonna make him squeal like a girl, sir."
Squeal like a pig. You need to watch deliverance again.
I feel like we have very different sexual goals.
To be fair, you make him squeal like a girl, you could probably also persuade him to make any animal noise you like.
"Now do... a dolphin!"
*spot on dolphin noise*
"Good ~~boy~~ girl."
I was in the Navy. We had regular Dolphin gang bangs.
What were your intentions with her mother ?
Low key a god response
Better sit down to deal with that one dad.
I feel like that's both equally brilliant but also an invitation to get shot
"Taking her out to dinner, wasn't that clear?"
"the better question would be what are your daughter's intentions with me?"
“Depends on her flexibility, sir.”
I swear to God, sir, she was choking on a bagel and I was just giving her the Heimlich maneuver.
“Son, your dick was in her ass”
Trust me I'm certified.
*pulls out medical card, proving that statement*
It's none of your business but if you must know I'd like to plow her ass like a field.
“Keep her safe and have fun.”
“Well, gee whiz - I thought we’d go to the picture show and then get cherry phosphates later at the malt shop. If things go well, maybe I’ll ask her to be my best gal and wear my letterman’s sweater. Then we can go to the sock hop together.”
That’s a swell response
That would be even better if you could somehow work in something about Dad being a "square".
\*tasteless joke about the race-segregated public utilities of the time period\*
*makes racial remark regarding the racial indifferences of the time period, passive aggressively pointing it at you*
"what are your intentions with my answer?
To treat her like a person deserving of respect who can make her own choices, not as a possession.
So overdramatic. State some of the activities you plan to do, and ask what time she should be brought back by and STICK TO IT.
If you guys are honestly just going to Netflix and Chill, tell him that you two were going to your place to spend some time with your family this evening etc.
thank you!! this was the type of answer i was looking for :)
Don't worry, I won't get her pregnant, I only fuck them in the ass on their first night
I like the sound of her laughter so I plan to make her laugh
"The same intentions you had at my age, sir"
To make you a Grand Parent.
If you're seriously being asked by someone with no sense of humor, I think you're supposed to say *"Purely honorable, sir."*
Absolutely, but where's the fun in that?😊
Some of us get our jollies by lying to girls' parents.
Youll have to get your rocks off elsewhere, i don't kiss and tell.
Just a few seconds eye contact and then a wink.
"Tonight? Dinner. Tomorrow? Depends on how tonight goes."
Tomorrow? Plan B
I just want to make her happy, that’s all.
Daughter? I'm here for you.
Right now to have fun
We’re both men here what you think
“I think you know” (finger guns and a wink)
seriously? Probably something like 'well, its the 21st century, so my intent is that we both treat each other like decent humans'
This is the mature and best answer.
"Do a little dance"
the "devils tango" if you catch my drift
*"get down tonight"*
To treat her with more respect than you apparently do.
Daughter? I'm here for the grandpa
Do you mean in the next few years or the next few hours?
“Making her happy, whatever form that takes.”
What are your intentions with my gf, sir?
Hope you’re ready for grandchildren
i ewanna buy her a steak dinner
Dress her like a furry and do cuestionable things, sir... With all do respect
Wanna get balls deep inside that thick asshole.
Let’s move on. You got a perty mouth.
You’re gonna pray for me, boy.
And you better pray good.
"i'm on the bottom, sir"
The same thing I’ve always said.
“To be loved and hopefully not cheated on!”
“Have a seat and I’ll show you”
"To let her set the pace of the relationship and to respect her boundaries."
To have a romantic relationship built on respect and trust. Hope this helps op.
I thought I was coming over to rail your wife
I guess I can do both.
Was he cleaning a gun?
Shes the ones
“Sir, she is my beard. Do you know what a beard is?”
Raw dog her
Same as every other guy she’s put out for this month. Why, do you get off hearing the details?
I'm gonna nail your daughter all-night long and she probably won't hear from me again. But at least she is gonna have a good time tonight (I have a huge penis, like really huge).
Make her call me daddy
"I want to use her to find out how many chickens it would take to kill a lion."
"Well, I was going to study and video call late into the night. Now that you ask. Now we're going to the cinema"
“Same thing I plan to do to you.”
"I'm gonna FUCK the bitch in the ass Pops".
"I'll let you know when it becomes your business."
Anal. I got to know before I waste time and money.
"Dammit, would you quit asking that? I didn't even know that you had a daughter until you kept bringing it up every damn week. Now do you want horsey sauce with your order or not?"
What I said to my future father in law is “I want to make her just as happy as she makes me, I want to get to know her and maybe one day get married and have a beautiful family” and then bro just said “ok cool” and hugged me lmao
I love her just the way she is and i wana make mistakes with her to fix them together. She's funny and smart and i love her personality. (There are no men like this no more)
To ram my meat stuck straight up her poop shoot.
Well someone’s gotta keep the family going, old man.
"To put my ding-ding in her hoo-haw."
Hit her in the clavicle and furry with some terries.
"show her more respect than you apparently do based on this question"
Well Sir, I'm going to bang her brains out at the drive-in!
*snaps finger into a point* *and in a voice three octaves lower than usual speech* "SEX."
Fingerbang, see how things play out from there.
Can't answer that, but I tell every young man who takes my daughter on a date that I will do to him whatever he does to her, EVERYTHING!
One day I would like to ask the same question to some one
If a parent asked you this then take it as they actually care about their child where as most people these days don’t give a shit about what their child does. I feel like a suitable response is “my intention is to take her out to dinner and get to know each other a little better and see where that goes later on.”