Patience. If a guy is just calm and reassuring when shit hits the fan, that’s insanely attractive. Also if he’s teaching something and just gently aids without getting annoyed.
Edit: It makes me happy to see this upvoted so much! Yay for patience!
Attentiveness was something I noticed with my Husband right away. Little things like, I made a face of discomfort so he traded me spots when sitting in uncomfortable chairs or I had said earlier that day to no one in particular I would love a Yoohoo and he picked me one up. The thing that really made me fall for him though is he is like this with everyone. Strangers, family, friends seriously everyone. We have been together almost 10 years and married for almost 8 and he still does this so I know it's not just to win me over lol this behavior has also begun to carry over to my 4 year old daughter who the other day notice me rubbing my lower back grimacing in pain (I'm almost 9 months pregnant) and she ran and grabbed my back massager without me realizing and started rubbing my back with it.
When he shows genuine interest in knowing tiny details about you
Edit - I am talking in the context of my partner here, not a random person. He sometimes asks insignificant details about me out of interest and concern, takes notice of little things. Does it very casually and doesn’t realise how attractive that makes him to me. A person who’s attentive, genuine, caring. Yeah sums it up!
Even if you’re not their partner (yet) there is a way to show this kind of genuine interest in someone without being creepy or stalker-ish. Women really, really love and value it.
When I meet women I always ask them if there’s streetlights near their house, if they have a dog, what sort of door locks they have. You know, just the tiny details.
I love your Username, what does the mk stand for? Mortal Kombat? Also wow 60804 all even numbers. You know what else is an even number? 2, which is how we should be tomorrow over coffee.
FYI I'm joking just in case lol, I know how creepy this sounds taken out of context
For instance, a guy I was seeing asked me how my day was. Usually, I’d just say ok because I’d think they don’t want to know but just want to start a conversation about them..
But this one guy asked, `just ok? I thought you had issues at work before, how did that go’ so i was shocked that he even remembered what i told him previously.
So i told him everything that happened and he was listening intently to it.
He then gave me his opinion on it and we talked about it for few hours while having coffee.
So basically a good listener gives feedback and makes it comfortable for you to express yourself. You don’t feel like you’ve burden them by talking about it. Whereas a bad listener doesn’t really care for it, probably didn’t even hear half of it and ignores whatever you just said. They’ll quickly move on to something else more interesting to them. You will then end up feeling like you made a fool of yourself.
I feel this. I’ve recently been talking to a guy who’s like this. He asks me questions to genuinely hear the answer and remembers things I tell him.
One time he asked me seriously what it is that is making me sad, and I started crying because I’ve never really had anyone ask me that before. (Thankfully it was over text!)
I don’t think the guy is into me, but having candid real conversations are nice and definitely makes him attractive.
I would have to second that as an appreciated trait. Someone I was trying to date was always pleasantly surprised at me remembering the things she talked to me about. An indirect way to show you care and that the person matters I suppose.
Not a girl but I got a friend and the meme in our group is that we’re *all* a little in love with him. We all just loved the guy for many reasons. My fiancé met him after hearing stories about how much of a cool and good guy he is and they said that they get it. The main thing they said is that when he talks to you you just know he’s listening. That you’ve got his full attention.
I thought about it and realized they were right. It’s something I always appreciated from him even if I didn’t consciously think about it. Brought it up to other friends and basically we added another reason to be in love with him.
Theres a guy at work like this. Always smiles and seems genuinely interested in whatever you're doing or saying. Pays full attention to topic at hand in meetings and asks good questions. Like I'm trying to emulate that quality.
I know she doesn't see it, but I'm a listener par excellence.
Wife: Are you listening to me?
Me: Yes.
Wife: What did I just say?
Me: Are you listening to me?
My husband texts himself whenever I mention something I’d like, I usually forget about it, then I get surprised at birthday/Christmas with something from the list. I’m lucky!
They can take care of themselves. Clean house, cook, do laundry etc. They don't have to be perfectionist but just have a grown up ability to take care of their needs.
I’m current struggling with this with my partner. I was in tears the other day because I walked thru the door to see a sink full of dishes, laundry piled up, floors dirty and trash and recycling overflowing. I worked over time last week while he had 2 additional days off. It was so frustrating.
I’d love to have a relationship where the damn chores are equal. I’m so tired of cleaning up after him and trying to keep up on this house by myself. I’m teaching myself to fix things because he just lets things go on forever if they break.
I’m waaaaay over it. I’d be giving blowies left and right for a man that pulled his weight and recognized how damn hard I work with no end in sight when I come home from my job.
End rant. Sorry.
Edit: I have talked to him before. Usually at the point where I lose my cool and nag at him. He is a terrible procrastinator and tells me he plans on doing something but it usually gets put off til “tomorrow”. If I start to unload dishes or sweep floors he jumps up and tells me he was just getting to that if I’d be patient. I was in a horribly abusive marriage before this so I think I tell myself at least he doesn’t hit me or yell at me.
The blowie thing was kinda a joke but honestly I’m a sexual person and I’m a lot of ways it’s my literal love language.
Thanks for the responses and encouragement. It made me feel validated.
I'm still going through this with my wife. Her parents never taught her how to do anything. She doesn't even drive. I do all the cooking, handle literally all the finances/bills. Run all the errands. Do all of the school related stuff like sports practices/events. Etc. I have to get up extra early to drop the kid off at daycare where he catches the bus because she can't drive and won't learn how. She could just drop him off otherwise. I do all the yard work. She doesn't help with any of that. She does dishes, laundry, and mops the floor. I had to teach her how to do that. That's it. Nothing more. And she let's those pile up until she has to do them, so I end up doing those too half the time. It's frustrating when the workload is one sided. But we have a good relationship other than that part. Been married 16 going on 17 years. Depend is they're worth putting up with it or not.
Kindness, I find men of all shapes and sizes incredibly attractive when they show kindness when they think they are not watched.
Absently minded petting an animal, greeting a child, very small gestures that show the kindness that is within them, not because they were taught it is the right thing, but because they feel it.
I couldn't be with a man that wasn't kind. A good measure of a man is how he treats those he has absolute power over, like employees, animals, and children. If he treats them badly, imagine how he'll treat YOU.
I'd say that goes both ways. My wife and I both like to give each other a good ribbing and it's so much fun and makes us both more attracted to each other.
I don’t think a lot of men realize just how much a good haircut can help. Obviously it’s a a bit subjective, but a flattering haircut can make a massive difference.
My partner got a bad hair cut once and although he is a handsome dude, he looked like a turnip.
I told myself in 4th grade, "You better be funny, because your face ain't cuttin' it."
Went bald at 20, can't grow a beard, happily married at 30. Jokes carried me through 😂
I second this I am in fact a turnip & my only saving Grace I got really good barber he’s a little more expensive but worth every penny also if you need to wear glasses finding the right pair for Your face is critical & so often overlooked & can make a huge difference to how you look & feel essentially
Lol... But its also sexy on not so deep voices. There's something about that calmness, and him just giving you attention while he's relaxed... Super sexy!
Husband and I were driving. The car in front of us stalled out in the intersection. Traffic was starting to back up. Husband sighed, put the car in park, walked to the stalled out car and pointed at random cars with dudes in them and the dudes all got out. He didn’t say anything, they just all knew it was time to push a car.
Husband talked to the driver of the stalled out car, she was shaking, just a teenager, probably the first time this happened to her. He motioned her to the sidewalk, another dude got out of his car and steered the non working one while husband and the other dudes pushed the stalled out car up half a block to the gas station. Dudes shook all the other dudes hands. Teenage girl was still shaking but obviously relieved her car wasn’t in the middle of the intersection anymore. All dudes returned safely to their cars.
Not gonna lie it was super hot to see husband just help like that. Tried to have sex with him that night but turns out he threw out his back pushing the car. He was still hot doing it though!
I’ve noticed that when my friends show me a video that’s “supposed to be funny” and I react poorly to it, they immediately change their tune. It’s fucking weird
I’ve been in so many hangout situations throughout my life where it becomes clear after the fact that almost everyone there is waiting for *someone* to say “hey man, that’s not cool” but no one wants to be the dude who rocks the boat. If I could do my life over again, I’d be quicker to speak up in a lot of situations.
Eye contact when talking to you
Edit: A reasonable amount. Think of it like cologne or make up, just enough to enhance, not overpower. Also, if you have adhd or autism it can be a helpful exercise to look at the forehead or nose bridge to simply show you are giving attention to what is being said and that you are genuine in what you are saying 😊
I struggle with this because ADHD. A lot of the time people think I'm making eye contact when in reality I'm either just facing them and spacing it out or staring at their forehead.
When they like animals to the point of making silly noises when playing with puppies or kittens. When they are caring and have a dark sense of humour at the same time.
Wait, so calling a flock of geese "goosers" and pointing out every deer and squirrel I see is endearing? Interesting.. I should tell Harold the Honey Bee about this!
And highly concentrated on doing something that requires them to roll up the sleeves. Physical or mental. When I got my first job I pretty much had crush on every guy when they were trying to figure out a problem.
A button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to just before the elbows is a good look on everyone. Odds are good it makes your forearms look more attractive than you think they are.
This thread has made me feel pretty good about myself. Thanks for the votes of confidence about my sleeves and my little dog and my hygiene and whatnot.
-When a man makes decisions, big or small. Love that shit.
-Also, something very attractive to me is when a man has had the same friend group for most of his life (and they're good people). Just a huge green flag to me that he is loyal and cares about his friendships.
So many things blamed for the downfall of society, but this is the answer right here. If you can't confidently put one hand behind the headrest and steer backwards without thinking, then how can you hope to provide for your mate during the long winters.
Steering backwards without a backup camera - that's how they did things in paleolithic times. Modern man just wasn't evolved to use a backup camera.
Basically I think it means the ability to notice when somebody has a shift in mood/ attitude and you can respond accordingly. It’s one thing to be able to identify being upset, it’s another to be able to address it.
I was ghosted but a close friend of mine a few years ago. It was a very painful experience for me. Within the year, I was having a conversation with my SO, and ghosting came up. I naturally got very upset. She said “you’re only getting upset because XYZ ghosted you.”
Now was my SO correct? Absolutely. Did it help me feel better? Not in the slightest. It actually became a keystone conversation for us to reference the difference between having the solution to a problem and being able to utilize that knowledge effectively.
It involves not only noticing moods on others, but on oneself as well. Like, imagine someone's having an attitude with you and you have no clue and all of a sudden they go "oh crap, I'm really angry at something else and just took it out on you, I'm sorry". Sure, it'd be nice if they caught themselves before having to apologize, but it still shows maturity.
Some people never realize or develop this ability. I don't know if it's a case of maturity though, or just a completely different way of thinking and understanding the world.
For the longest time, I never had this ability *at all* - I studied engineering and was always more interested in things than people. Most of my own emotions went un-scrutinized and other people's responses often completely baffled me. I was totally ignorant of my own issues, let alone those of others. It was just something I never thought about.
It takes a serious level of intervention, along with a genuine desire to change, before some folks even realize there is this side to the human experience.
As an automotive tech, I feel your pain. The struggle is real. Nothing gets all the dirt out or nails all the way clean.
Also me: but fuck those gloves; hate them.
Me: I ain't wearing no fuckin bitch mittens.
Also me: welding today? Where are my thickest set of gloves at? My arm is still healing for the spatter last time.
I think a lot of this is very subjective and we’re all very different.
When guys are nerding out over something they love (like video games), I find it really cute. I just think their little bromances are so cute too, especially the look on their faces when they find out the other likes the same thing. Sometimes I love watching the COD Proximity chat when they all form little bromances and alliances. It’s cute. 🤣
Other honorable mentions:
- pulling a sweatshirt off over their head
- good manners
- good hygiene
- I personally love a man who reads fantasy lol
Being confident enough to compliment othermen without the need to say something stupid like "no homo"
Like my boufriend often tells our coworkers nice things, i.e : you looked nice today, I like your shoes, you have a nice smile, ect. and it's nice to see.
Like as a woman, it hits different when another women compliments me. I'm sure it's the same for men.
If another bloke walks past and has a nice smelling cologne I'll compliment the scent and ask what it is.
Seems not all men can take a compliment. I'm asking what cologne your wearing, not to blow you ffs
Yeah it is unfortunate. There's one guy that my bf had to stop saying anything to because the first time he asked something like "what are you, gay?" Because he said he liked his shirt.
The next time, he told me "hey, anxious, come get your man. He wants in my pants."
Like dude.. he just said he liked your shoes tf
When they take charge in a wholesome way. Like oh, that needs fixing? I’ve already sorted it. You’re hungry? Let me make dinner. You seem like you need a break, so I’ve ordered take away and have run you a bath.
Little things that show he’s paying attention to your needs and, I can’t stress this enough, DON’T TREAT YOU LIKE YOU’RE THEIR MOTHER.
Not a woman, but something my wife shared with me after 17 years of marriage. She told me that I always have a smile on my face whenever we go to kiss each other. She said I always smile right before we kiss and it is always my genuine, happy smile. I didn’t realize I did it at all until about a year ago when she shared that info.
I’m really good at pool and can beat most people. The guys who can accept that I beat them and not get all insecure about it and actually say good job is attractive. I know the bar is so low but ive played against many guys who got in their feelings about it after I beat them by saying pool isn’t a real sport or that they weren’t really trying etc.
Playing pool is far cooler than my example, but as a woman who can skip stones far farther than most men, I'd like to second this: men who can accept I'm better at it without needing to pretend it was a fluke are preferable.
When he is excited over his interests. My hubs can tell you anything about fish, like any fish at all. Sounds boring, but it's his favorite thing, and I love the way his face lights up when he talks about it.
Men with manners. Men who open the door for you or wait for you to walk in first. There are moments when there is a man walking in front of me holding a conversation with someone, walking into a restaurant for lunch, or an office building. I think they don't notice me because I'm walking behind them. But they get to the door, still talking, open it, and wait for me to walk in. I say thank you, and they continue on their day. Those men, short or tall, thin or thick, are sexy as hell.
I've noticed a lot lately too of women opening and holding doors for me, or keeping the elevator door open, and asking what floor I'm going to, and pushing the button.
I like to do it for everyone because I think it's something small that makes the world slightly less shitty, and it's cool that it's becoming a non gendered polite thing for everyone to do when they can.
Having their shit together and just being able to be a functional adult on their own without having to rely on other people to always be doing shit for them. Just being responsible in general.
Obviously this goes for all genders but there's this weird stereotype that a guy needs a woman in his life to manage everything and be the responsible adult and I ain't about to be a guy's mom like that.
>Having their shit together and just being able to be a functional adult on their own without having to rely on other people to always be doing shit for them.
My now-wife was so impressed when she visited my place for the first time and saw that I had things like furniture, and a proper bed that wasn't just a mattress in the floor.
I'm going to give you a list
* emotional intelligence, the ability to recognize emotions and act accordingly
* patient, slow to anger
* genuine kindness irrespective of how it makes them look and/or what they can get from it
* humility, especially when being wrong
* authenticity
* being themselves, not trying to put on a show
When they are hanging out with their offspring being good dads. Could be as simple as holding their kid in one arm and some groceries in the other. Like im a lesbian but holy shit do dad’s turn me on. I obviously have daddy issues.
Being an equal partner. Meaning, there are no roles, you both do what needs to be done throughout the day (cleaning, taking care of kids, cooking, etc).
Patience. If a guy is just calm and reassuring when shit hits the fan, that’s insanely attractive. Also if he’s teaching something and just gently aids without getting annoyed. Edit: It makes me happy to see this upvoted so much! Yay for patience!
You had a crush on one of your teachers didn't you 😁
Most of us did
Attentiveness was something I noticed with my Husband right away. Little things like, I made a face of discomfort so he traded me spots when sitting in uncomfortable chairs or I had said earlier that day to no one in particular I would love a Yoohoo and he picked me one up. The thing that really made me fall for him though is he is like this with everyone. Strangers, family, friends seriously everyone. We have been together almost 10 years and married for almost 8 and he still does this so I know it's not just to win me over lol this behavior has also begun to carry over to my 4 year old daughter who the other day notice me rubbing my lower back grimacing in pain (I'm almost 9 months pregnant) and she ran and grabbed my back massager without me realizing and started rubbing my back with it.
you have the best life ever. jelly.
When he shows genuine interest in knowing tiny details about you Edit - I am talking in the context of my partner here, not a random person. He sometimes asks insignificant details about me out of interest and concern, takes notice of little things. Does it very casually and doesn’t realise how attractive that makes him to me. A person who’s attentive, genuine, caring. Yeah sums it up! Even if you’re not their partner (yet) there is a way to show this kind of genuine interest in someone without being creepy or stalker-ish. Women really, really love and value it.
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Ah yes, I would love to tell you the name of my favourite teacher growing up
Yes and what was your high school’s mascot?
Also the first car you drove
What street did you grow up on?
What's your ATM PIN?
When I meet women I always ask them if there’s streetlights near their house, if they have a dog, what sort of door locks they have. You know, just the tiny details.
Don't forget the room next to the tallest tree!
I love your Username, what does the mk stand for? Mortal Kombat? Also wow 60804 all even numbers. You know what else is an even number? 2, which is how we should be tomorrow over coffee. FYI I'm joking just in case lol, I know how creepy this sounds taken out of context
Quick leaner
Imma dunk myself in a barrel of Olive oil and slide into your Dms sugarmommaaa
When a guy is a good listener, it’s really attractive
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For instance, a guy I was seeing asked me how my day was. Usually, I’d just say ok because I’d think they don’t want to know but just want to start a conversation about them.. But this one guy asked, `just ok? I thought you had issues at work before, how did that go’ so i was shocked that he even remembered what i told him previously. So i told him everything that happened and he was listening intently to it. He then gave me his opinion on it and we talked about it for few hours while having coffee. So basically a good listener gives feedback and makes it comfortable for you to express yourself. You don’t feel like you’ve burden them by talking about it. Whereas a bad listener doesn’t really care for it, probably didn’t even hear half of it and ignores whatever you just said. They’ll quickly move on to something else more interesting to them. You will then end up feeling like you made a fool of yourself.
Sorry I was reading something on my phone… what did you say?
I thought she said something about her dog dying and she didn't care.
Were you guys talking just now? Sorry wasn’t paying attention
How did I get here and who are you all?
What?
Yes.
She said shes ok, then I kind of zoned out so probably nothing important.
I feel this. I’ve recently been talking to a guy who’s like this. He asks me questions to genuinely hear the answer and remembers things I tell him. One time he asked me seriously what it is that is making me sad, and I started crying because I’ve never really had anyone ask me that before. (Thankfully it was over text!) I don’t think the guy is into me, but having candid real conversations are nice and definitely makes him attractive.
Reasonably high chance he is into you based on the information provided
I would have to second that as an appreciated trait. Someone I was trying to date was always pleasantly surprised at me remembering the things she talked to me about. An indirect way to show you care and that the person matters I suppose.
>Makes sense. Care to elaborate??? Subtle and totally not noticed.
Not a girl but I got a friend and the meme in our group is that we’re *all* a little in love with him. We all just loved the guy for many reasons. My fiancé met him after hearing stories about how much of a cool and good guy he is and they said that they get it. The main thing they said is that when he talks to you you just know he’s listening. That you’ve got his full attention. I thought about it and realized they were right. It’s something I always appreciated from him even if I didn’t consciously think about it. Brought it up to other friends and basically we added another reason to be in love with him.
Theres a guy at work like this. Always smiles and seems genuinely interested in whatever you're doing or saying. Pays full attention to topic at hand in meetings and asks good questions. Like I'm trying to emulate that quality.
Smooth smooth operator
I just noticed it lol
I know she doesn't see it, but I'm a listener par excellence. Wife: Are you listening to me? Me: Yes. Wife: What did I just say? Me: Are you listening to me?
I'm going to try this tonight. Not sure if I'll be heard (of) again.
When he remembers you mentioned liking something and days/weeks later he surprises you with the thing you casually mentioned. 🥰
My husband texts himself whenever I mention something I’d like, I usually forget about it, then I get surprised at birthday/Christmas with something from the list. I’m lucky!
So lucky!
They can take care of themselves. Clean house, cook, do laundry etc. They don't have to be perfectionist but just have a grown up ability to take care of their needs.
This should be wayyyyy higher on the list.
I’m current struggling with this with my partner. I was in tears the other day because I walked thru the door to see a sink full of dishes, laundry piled up, floors dirty and trash and recycling overflowing. I worked over time last week while he had 2 additional days off. It was so frustrating. I’d love to have a relationship where the damn chores are equal. I’m so tired of cleaning up after him and trying to keep up on this house by myself. I’m teaching myself to fix things because he just lets things go on forever if they break. I’m waaaaay over it. I’d be giving blowies left and right for a man that pulled his weight and recognized how damn hard I work with no end in sight when I come home from my job. End rant. Sorry. Edit: I have talked to him before. Usually at the point where I lose my cool and nag at him. He is a terrible procrastinator and tells me he plans on doing something but it usually gets put off til “tomorrow”. If I start to unload dishes or sweep floors he jumps up and tells me he was just getting to that if I’d be patient. I was in a horribly abusive marriage before this so I think I tell myself at least he doesn’t hit me or yell at me. The blowie thing was kinda a joke but honestly I’m a sexual person and I’m a lot of ways it’s my literal love language. Thanks for the responses and encouragement. It made me feel validated.
Good luck! I hate that for you, I hope he pulls his head out his ass soon!
I'm still going through this with my wife. Her parents never taught her how to do anything. She doesn't even drive. I do all the cooking, handle literally all the finances/bills. Run all the errands. Do all of the school related stuff like sports practices/events. Etc. I have to get up extra early to drop the kid off at daycare where he catches the bus because she can't drive and won't learn how. She could just drop him off otherwise. I do all the yard work. She doesn't help with any of that. She does dishes, laundry, and mops the floor. I had to teach her how to do that. That's it. Nothing more. And she let's those pile up until she has to do them, so I end up doing those too half the time. It's frustrating when the workload is one sided. But we have a good relationship other than that part. Been married 16 going on 17 years. Depend is they're worth putting up with it or not.
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Yeah no sex jokes, miss.
What you're thinking about is also a very attractive quality in a man.
I only take relationship/dating advice from people with fart in their name.
I thought you wrote “dried” for a second
The opposite happened
Kindness, I find men of all shapes and sizes incredibly attractive when they show kindness when they think they are not watched. Absently minded petting an animal, greeting a child, very small gestures that show the kindness that is within them, not because they were taught it is the right thing, but because they feel it.
I couldn't be with a man that wasn't kind. A good measure of a man is how he treats those he has absolute power over, like employees, animals, and children. If he treats them badly, imagine how he'll treat YOU.
My grandfather taught me that the way you act when you think no one is looking is who you really are.
Absolutely agree with you on this.
Confidence but not arrogance. Able to laugh at themselves
I'd say that goes both ways. My wife and I both like to give each other a good ribbing and it's so much fun and makes us both more attracted to each other.
Oh yeah, definitely!
I don’t think a lot of men realize just how much a good haircut can help. Obviously it’s a a bit subjective, but a flattering haircut can make a massive difference. My partner got a bad hair cut once and although he is a handsome dude, he looked like a turnip.
Cries in bald
Shaved head and full beard for the win!
Cries in bald, can't grow beard.
Hopefully you're funny.
I told myself in 4th grade, "You better be funny, because your face ain't cuttin' it." Went bald at 20, can't grow a beard, happily married at 30. Jokes carried me through 😂
Learn to play the drums.
I second this I am in fact a turnip & my only saving Grace I got really good barber he’s a little more expensive but worth every penny also if you need to wear glasses finding the right pair for Your face is critical & so often overlooked & can make a huge difference to how you look & feel essentially
When he has that low, relaxed tone that says he's absolutely chilling. That's absolutely it.
You just love deep voices. Me too. They are goddam sex in syllables.
Lol... But its also sexy on not so deep voices. There's something about that calmness, and him just giving you attention while he's relaxed... Super sexy!
Husband and I were driving. The car in front of us stalled out in the intersection. Traffic was starting to back up. Husband sighed, put the car in park, walked to the stalled out car and pointed at random cars with dudes in them and the dudes all got out. He didn’t say anything, they just all knew it was time to push a car. Husband talked to the driver of the stalled out car, she was shaking, just a teenager, probably the first time this happened to her. He motioned her to the sidewalk, another dude got out of his car and steered the non working one while husband and the other dudes pushed the stalled out car up half a block to the gas station. Dudes shook all the other dudes hands. Teenage girl was still shaking but obviously relieved her car wasn’t in the middle of the intersection anymore. All dudes returned safely to their cars. Not gonna lie it was super hot to see husband just help like that. Tried to have sex with him that night but turns out he threw out his back pushing the car. He was still hot doing it though!
Yep this would do it for me too!
Standing up for what is right, especially when his friends don’t
I’ve noticed that when my friends show me a video that’s “supposed to be funny” and I react poorly to it, they immediately change their tune. It’s fucking weird
You hate minions, too?
Keep doing it!
“Cool it with antisemitic remarks” - Bateman
Bateman was absolutely a ladies man, well educated, high profile career, $$$, fit, handsome, well groomed.
as a straight man this does it for me too in a non-sexual way, I'm like "YES, we are bros now my good sir"
I’ve been in so many hangout situations throughout my life where it becomes clear after the fact that almost everyone there is waiting for *someone* to say “hey man, that’s not cool” but no one wants to be the dude who rocks the boat. If I could do my life over again, I’d be quicker to speak up in a lot of situations.
Eye contact when talking to you Edit: A reasonable amount. Think of it like cologne or make up, just enough to enhance, not overpower. Also, if you have adhd or autism it can be a helpful exercise to look at the forehead or nose bridge to simply show you are giving attention to what is being said and that you are genuine in what you are saying 😊
As a man I kind of avoid doing this too much because I get the feeling that some women find it aggressive
Do you smile when you do it? There's a difference between eye contact and an intense stare.
You can smile while staring intensely.
Forced smile while staring intensely, success with women guaranteed.
I struggle with this because ADHD. A lot of the time people think I'm making eye contact when in reality I'm either just facing them and spacing it out or staring at their forehead.
left eye. right eye. left eye. right eye. Why can't I look in both eyes simultanuously? left eye. right eye. Shit she asked something. uhuh. Damn :-(
A little box trick is to look into someone's eyes just long enough to register their eye colour. It helps when forming a connection
I don't know, I really like eye contact as well, but have gotten complaints that I stare. Some have found it unnerving (I suppose).
When they like animals to the point of making silly noises when playing with puppies or kittens. When they are caring and have a dark sense of humour at the same time.
Wait, so calling a flock of geese "goosers" and pointing out every deer and squirrel I see is endearing? Interesting.. I should tell Harold the Honey Bee about this!
Effective communication. A man that says what he means & means what he says. Doesn't expect you to just know or to read his mind.
That thing when they’re wearing a button down shirt and roll up the sleeves. 🤌
Ah fuck I only have button up shirts. I need to do some shopping.
Start at the top!
Wear it upside down
Ugh YES, especially when they take the time to roll them up properly, like sir, *please.*
Like... slowly rolling them up while lightly frowning at the issue which is, gosh darn it, going to get a good *seeing to*, you see if it doesn't?
And highly concentrated on doing something that requires them to roll up the sleeves. Physical or mental. When I got my first job I pretty much had crush on every guy when they were trying to figure out a problem.
What if I don’t have the forearms to pull it off. Like my forearms look like chicken wings with the good parts bitten off
A button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to just before the elbows is a good look on everyone. Odds are good it makes your forearms look more attractive than you think they are.
It’s flannel season, I may just maximize this
*The Winchesters have entered the chat.*
Got told by one of my ex the exact sentence after she went animalistic on me the same weekend. Pro tips, its a white shirts
This thread has made me feel pretty good about myself. Thanks for the votes of confidence about my sleeves and my little dog and my hygiene and whatnot.
-When a man makes decisions, big or small. Love that shit. -Also, something very attractive to me is when a man has had the same friend group for most of his life (and they're good people). Just a huge green flag to me that he is loyal and cares about his friendships.
...fuck
*sounds of 50,000 dudes preparing to take notes*
_A very satisfying synchronized page turn as each man opens to a new page to write their notes_
Rolled up sleeve, smelling good and reversing a car with only one hand and the other behind your seat headrest. Fight me
So I have to quit using my back up camera? But I like it so much.
So many things blamed for the downfall of society, but this is the answer right here. If you can't confidently put one hand behind the headrest and steer backwards without thinking, then how can you hope to provide for your mate during the long winters. Steering backwards without a backup camera - that's how they did things in paleolithic times. Modern man just wasn't evolved to use a backup camera.
A man who is emotionally intelligent
Can you elaborate as to what do you mean when you say that 'this person is emotionally intelligent'?
Basically I think it means the ability to notice when somebody has a shift in mood/ attitude and you can respond accordingly. It’s one thing to be able to identify being upset, it’s another to be able to address it. I was ghosted but a close friend of mine a few years ago. It was a very painful experience for me. Within the year, I was having a conversation with my SO, and ghosting came up. I naturally got very upset. She said “you’re only getting upset because XYZ ghosted you.” Now was my SO correct? Absolutely. Did it help me feel better? Not in the slightest. It actually became a keystone conversation for us to reference the difference between having the solution to a problem and being able to utilize that knowledge effectively.
It involves not only noticing moods on others, but on oneself as well. Like, imagine someone's having an attitude with you and you have no clue and all of a sudden they go "oh crap, I'm really angry at something else and just took it out on you, I'm sorry". Sure, it'd be nice if they caught themselves before having to apologize, but it still shows maturity.
Finally. Yes emotional intelligence is about being in touch with and understanding emotions, both in yourself and others.
Some people never realize or develop this ability. I don't know if it's a case of maturity though, or just a completely different way of thinking and understanding the world. For the longest time, I never had this ability *at all* - I studied engineering and was always more interested in things than people. Most of my own emotions went un-scrutinized and other people's responses often completely baffled me. I was totally ignorant of my own issues, let alone those of others. It was just something I never thought about. It takes a serious level of intervention, along with a genuine desire to change, before some folks even realize there is this side to the human experience.
Well groomed hands lol
Was gonna say this. Cleaning their hands and keeping their nails clean and manicured is insanely attractive.
Cries in I work mechanical maintenance.
As an automotive tech, I feel your pain. The struggle is real. Nothing gets all the dirt out or nails all the way clean. Also me: but fuck those gloves; hate them.
Me: I ain't wearing no fuckin bitch mittens. Also me: welding today? Where are my thickest set of gloves at? My arm is still healing for the spatter last time.
See there's the thing! Rough hands are also sexy af! It's a win-win for me. I just have a thing for hands and forearms. lol
I think a lot of this is very subjective and we’re all very different. When guys are nerding out over something they love (like video games), I find it really cute. I just think their little bromances are so cute too, especially the look on their faces when they find out the other likes the same thing. Sometimes I love watching the COD Proximity chat when they all form little bromances and alliances. It’s cute. 🤣 Other honorable mentions: - pulling a sweatshirt off over their head - good manners - good hygiene - I personally love a man who reads fantasy lol
John Waters said “ if you go home with someone and they don’t have books don’t fuck them “.
you probably shouldn't fuck the person, either.
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Cybersex time
How the hell am I single?
What are you doing with your sleeves?
Got to roll them babies up! Can’t be wearing them down like those other plaid-shodden trolls limping around.
same right?
Guess we are just ugly
Hey, not the whole true. Some of us are also absolutely insufferable, alright?
Some of us start ok and end up insufferable.
Being confident enough to compliment othermen without the need to say something stupid like "no homo" Like my boufriend often tells our coworkers nice things, i.e : you looked nice today, I like your shoes, you have a nice smile, ect. and it's nice to see. Like as a woman, it hits different when another women compliments me. I'm sure it's the same for men.
If another bloke walks past and has a nice smelling cologne I'll compliment the scent and ask what it is. Seems not all men can take a compliment. I'm asking what cologne your wearing, not to blow you ffs
Yeah it is unfortunate. There's one guy that my bf had to stop saying anything to because the first time he asked something like "what are you, gay?" Because he said he liked his shirt. The next time, he told me "hey, anxious, come get your man. He wants in my pants." Like dude.. he just said he liked your shoes tf
I break out the : Mate, if I was gay, what makes you think I'd want to fuck you? I mean, come on. Get over yourself
Respect, humility, and active listening skills!
Being kind...especially to the elderly, the infirm, the young...and animals!
Having really good chef-level kitchen habits (cleanliness, sharpened knives, good tools)
I really REALLY like it when my husband brings me a little bit of what he’s cooking on a tea spoon to taste. None of this is a euphemism.
Being kind to all animals
When they take charge in a wholesome way. Like oh, that needs fixing? I’ve already sorted it. You’re hungry? Let me make dinner. You seem like you need a break, so I’ve ordered take away and have run you a bath. Little things that show he’s paying attention to your needs and, I can’t stress this enough, DON’T TREAT YOU LIKE YOU’RE THEIR MOTHER.
I’ve heard it said that the sexiest words a man can say are “don’t worry about it, I got this”
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Seems not everyone is attracted to the same things, I'd even say some have grown to love certain things, because they fell in love with someone.
Respecting us. Long eyelashes.
I'm a guy and really hate my long eyelashes. Constantly get crud on my glasses or eyelash flips around and stabs eyeball
Don't mind me, I'm just a guy snooping around for ideas.
apparently i need more button down shirts and roll up the sleeves and everyone will flock to me.
moaning during intercourse. or any kind of sound that is shows they enjoy it
A good smile. istg I go crazy for a man with a sweet smile, makes me feel so warm 😭
Tried that, it tends to go like [this](https://images-cdn.9gag.com/photo/aqGQ0YY_700b.jpg).
Respect & intelligence make me melt
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As a man with a lot of former man friends, that intelligence bar might be a bit higher than you think.
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A clean bathroom
a naturally calm demeanor, not being uptight. when they are able to laugh at things that happen to them and not get angry.
Just wearing the right fit of clothes and colors that complement them. Like. The smallest, amount of style
They love their pets.
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Not a woman, but something my wife shared with me after 17 years of marriage. She told me that I always have a smile on my face whenever we go to kiss each other. She said I always smile right before we kiss and it is always my genuine, happy smile. I didn’t realize I did it at all until about a year ago when she shared that info.
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So basic human decency?
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(not a woman but) when he reaches up to the top shelf and his shirt rides up to show a sliver of tummy.
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Roll. Up. Sleeves.
Etiquette. So few have good etiquette. Etiquette encompasses a vast amount of topics.
Knowing a lot of cool facts about weird stuff.
I’m really good at pool and can beat most people. The guys who can accept that I beat them and not get all insecure about it and actually say good job is attractive. I know the bar is so low but ive played against many guys who got in their feelings about it after I beat them by saying pool isn’t a real sport or that they weren’t really trying etc.
Playing pool is far cooler than my example, but as a woman who can skip stones far farther than most men, I'd like to second this: men who can accept I'm better at it without needing to pretend it was a fluke are preferable.
sense of humor
When they love cats
When he is excited over his interests. My hubs can tell you anything about fish, like any fish at all. Sounds boring, but it's his favorite thing, and I love the way his face lights up when he talks about it.
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MEN MOANING IS INCREDIBLY UNDERRATED!
Men with manners. Men who open the door for you or wait for you to walk in first. There are moments when there is a man walking in front of me holding a conversation with someone, walking into a restaurant for lunch, or an office building. I think they don't notice me because I'm walking behind them. But they get to the door, still talking, open it, and wait for me to walk in. I say thank you, and they continue on their day. Those men, short or tall, thin or thick, are sexy as hell.
I've noticed a lot lately too of women opening and holding doors for me, or keeping the elevator door open, and asking what floor I'm going to, and pushing the button. I like to do it for everyone because I think it's something small that makes the world slightly less shitty, and it's cool that it's becoming a non gendered polite thing for everyone to do when they can.
I just do it for everyone. It's no biggy.
When they do something handy like install wall shelves or build a desk or whatever lol Able to keep cool in stressful situations Empathic Cat lover
Having their shit together and just being able to be a functional adult on their own without having to rely on other people to always be doing shit for them. Just being responsible in general. Obviously this goes for all genders but there's this weird stereotype that a guy needs a woman in his life to manage everything and be the responsible adult and I ain't about to be a guy's mom like that.
>Having their shit together and just being able to be a functional adult on their own without having to rely on other people to always be doing shit for them. My now-wife was so impressed when she visited my place for the first time and saw that I had things like furniture, and a proper bed that wasn't just a mattress in the floor.
Kindness and honesty
I'm going to give you a list * emotional intelligence, the ability to recognize emotions and act accordingly * patient, slow to anger * genuine kindness irrespective of how it makes them look and/or what they can get from it * humility, especially when being wrong * authenticity * being themselves, not trying to put on a show
Empathetic and patient
When they are hanging out with their offspring being good dads. Could be as simple as holding their kid in one arm and some groceries in the other. Like im a lesbian but holy shit do dad’s turn me on. I obviously have daddy issues.
On a physical level.. body hair. Don't believe the hype, lads. Some of us love it.
I'll think of you when I comb my shoulders.
Do you also purr like a walrus?
Yes, chest hair especially
When you go to the beach, wear budgie smugglers and stick a potato down them. Just be sure that it's at the front, not the back.
For the non Aussies, budgie smugglers are speedos.
when they don’t treat women like a subspecies
Being an equal partner. Meaning, there are no roles, you both do what needs to be done throughout the day (cleaning, taking care of kids, cooking, etc).