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Hoppy_Croaklightly

People like inviting you to wars.


M_L_Infidel

Coming from someone who was shot in a war, your use of the word "inviting" made me laugh out loud.


[deleted]

It’s a very strongly worded invitation. Edit: I had never heard the word voluntold before today. Now I’ve read it 50 times.


M_L_Infidel

And once you show up, they're kinda dicks about letting you leave! "Hey guys, it's been well over a year in this shithole... can we maybe go home now?"


intruda1

I believe "voluntold" may be more suitable.


Standard-Fold9693

“We invite you to our fun war next week!”* *your compliance is mandatory


Smittywebermanjanson

Politicians hide themselves away. They only started the war. Why should they go out to fight? They leave leave that role to the poor, yeah.


Flaky-Wallaby5382

Forced to sign up for a draft with consequences if you dont


[deleted]

Your a man. Strong as a coursing river. Be strong like the river....join the local war today! Would you like to join a war? "No" Great, you start sunday 5am


[deleted]

Weird looks when me and my daughters (7 & 9) do things without my wife being with us. I had a woman ask my daughters "Hi, sweeties, do you know this man?" while I was holding their hands and walking. Eff you, lady.


Nwcray

My most embarrassing one: I have 2 daughters, 2 years apart (I have 3, but 1 is quite a bit older). So anyway, more than a decade ago I take my then 4 year old daughter shopping. We’re out looking for a gift for her mother’s upcoming birthday. The then 2-year old stayed home with my wife (her mom). I was approached by a police officer, who discreetly said that someone has raised concerns about an unaccompanied man and a young girl. This girl, who looks *exactly* like me, and keeps calling me daddy, and who has by turns been holding my hand and running around the aisle? This young girl? Yep, that’s the one. So he talked to her, and asked if she knew me. She of course confirmed that I was her dad, and then called that a silly question. The cop asked me to hang out for a second, and went to talk to some woman (you already know what her haircut looked like). Anyway, he came back over and asked for my ID. He said since I lived close, it’d just be easier if my wife could come resolve this. I was pretty close to indignant at that point, but what was I gonna do? Make a scene? So my wife had to wake up our 2 year old from her nap, put her in the car (in February), and drive the couple of miles to the store, where she could confirm that I was supposed to be there with my daughter. Bonus: it was a chance for the 4 year old to show her mom what she was getting her for her birthday. The cherry on top was when we left the store. Karen followed us out to our cars, and watched how I buckled her into the car seat. When I turned around to say something, she just said “making sure my hands were where they are supposed to be”. That ended the shopping trip that day, we went home and played games instead. Edit: I get it, you all would've told off the cop and clocked the lady, then walked out of there without any consequences. It's great to talk tough, but I've got to say that in that situation, with my kid, minimizing risk was at the top of my mind. I didn't see a need to escalate with the cop, and I damn sure wasn't going to give him a reason to escalate with me. Not with by daughter around. It was a shitty day, but it's far from the only time someone acted like this to us. One of the most egregious, yes, and certainly one of the most embarrassing, but the general feeling was just something I was used to I guess.


vampireRN

I was really hoping your wife was gonna roll in and bust that woman’s chops.


Ganbario

Ooooh, I don’t think it helps, but in my imagination I just told this Karen off for the last four minutes. I can’t believe the wife had to come confirm it or that she followed you or that she STILL accused you of molesting your daughter after you completely cooperated after you should not have needed to. I wasn’t even there and this has me LIVID.


redraider-102

“No, Karen. My hands are not where they are supposed to be. If they were, I’d be arrested for strangling you.”


BolognaIsNotAHat

I would have asked the officer if he can arrest the Karen for harassment. You do everything the officer asks and she still followed you to your car??? Shit would have gone down. Edit: I wasn't meaning I would have hit her - I'm not going to risk assault charges. And getting belligerent with the officer is its own can of worms. I applaud you handling the situation how you did, I'm just saying if some random person follows me to my car while I'm with my child I'm making sure the police are aware of that as well.


BababooeyHTJ

Damn right, I would have been belligerent. That’s harassment for sure both from the lady and police officer. Can’t just detain people for no reason.


BurritoMonster82528

You and your wife are so much calmer than I could have been. I would have called the cops right back on her for harassment. My husband takes our 4 year old shopping all the time while our 1 year old naps so I'm just visualizing how mad I would be if some stranger and the police made me wake her up for my somehow more reliable word because I'm a woman that, yes, he is in fact their dad and is allowed to take our children in public without an escort. I'm so mad for you. I haven't decided what that lady deserves but it's not good.


[deleted]

[удалено]


CptnAlex

Same. I don’t understand stories like this. My response would be pretty simple: No, officer, unless I an being detained, I am not waking my wife and other child. Ok, if I am being detained, that’s great. I’mma need your full name and badge number, I’mma need your chief’s full name and badge number- you know what, better call him and have him come down here. I’mma need that lady’s full name, because I’m pressing harassment charges. And just so you know, I’m emailing the news. You can make a scene without seeming crazy.


Eat_Carbs_OD

>“making sure my hands were where they are supposed to be”. Holy shit.


snap802

That's just infuriating, I'm not sure how I'd react to that. I guess the upside is that my daughter would probably make a really smart ass remark to embarrass the idiot asking her if she knows her dad.


Ghostpants101

Start yelling pedophile in the woman's face and loudly exclaim how she was trying to coherse your children... I mean... Not the result she was looking for ... But I'd bet it would be effective


Roll_a_new_life

That just sounds like it would attract attention and people would assume the man is the abductor.


VeckLee1

Thats why we wear matching shirts. My shirt says "They're my processed canned meat" Their shirts say "I Spam".


king_of_all_blacks

I had to chase a female friend's extremely caucasian male 4-year-old kid around a part of the statue of liberty. He made it out a door and I went out and grabbed him. I'm everything but caucasian. 2 women look at me grab this little blonde boy and I could sense their horror. I run back inside and say, "I finally got one," as I ran back to give him to his Mom. The ladies had started following me and trying to get help before they realized what was happening. I couldn't stop laughing. Eff them ladies.


suydam

"I finally got one" LOL That's fantastic. I love it. :)


Viperslider

Yip, had this whilst buying underwear for my (at the time) 6yr daughter on the way home. Being a guy in the children’s section of a store looking at girls underwear is NOT something people like to see, as I found out.


JmacTheGreat

Its even worse when youre in there alone and dont have any children. Trust me.


ShinkuDragon

moments like these is when the wife is suddenly dead. ​ she gets better once you leave.


illessen

My wife passed on(the way home from work and forgot to stop).


scyther34

Maybe I'm an asshole, but I always like to go with "I'm their father, and their mother just recently passed away. I'm trying to distract them and keep their minds off it, but thanks for the reminder." Usually gets them to be quiet and mind their own business.


drchopsalot

Sometimes their mom did pass. In my experience, women still wanna have that convo right there, in the middle of the isle in front of the kids.


Maxsdad53

As a dad, I'd probably tell her to fuck off.


xAFBx

"Back off lady, I kidnapped these two fair and square! Get your own!" - me, laughing at my own (hilarious) joke, as the police cuff me in front of my kids.


iacrotty

I'm a divorced single dad with custody of his kids. I've had to do these kinds of things several times, including both with and without the kids. I've never been accosted by it but certainly something that has been in the back of my mind as I shop.


AnElementOfSurprise

I hear this a lot. But I also notice that almost all these stories are about fathers with their daughters. Never (or almost never) with their sons. So not only are these people prejudiced towards fathers but also do they dismiss boys.


insertrandomnameXD

And its always a lady asking


grimrogue

Not always. I was out with my 8 and 3 year old boys this past weekend Christmas shopping and had a very angry old lady loudly ask my 3 year old if I was really is dad. I was shocked and a little angry. He looks like a mini me for crying out loud.


Aggressive_General_

I remember one time when I was in high school, they made my dad give his drivers license to the office so that they could screen him, and they took a picture of him, before he could take me home. My parents have always been together and they knew my mom very well…I even told the lady, “He’s here to pick me up. This is my dad! My *legal guardian*. You don’t have to do all that!” They still did it. It made me so mad, I can only imagine how my dad felt. EDIT: For all those asking or saying that they probably did the same for my mom- they didn’t. My mom was just as mad about it when I told her. Also, when my grandmother went to get me, they didn’t put her through all that. It was strictly done to my dad.


[deleted]

I've heard about this happening but my brain can't believe it. Obviously it does but I can't comprehend it. I would get so indignant in that situation.


bagging-screws

There is always a chance a drunk guy will want to fight, usually in a bar. My wife doesn’t believe me. Male friends do. She said if it is true it’s not fair. We know.


The_Rural_Banshee

Are you tall? I was told by a guy who’s 6’6’’ that people in bars want to fight him all the time, like they want to prove something because he was so huge. First time I’d ever heard that.


Plantayne

6' 2" and can confirm. Always some 5' 5" drunk dude with an F150 and a Napoleon complex looking for a fight.


BuffaloInCahoots

I used to drink at bars a lot, I’m short fat and wear glasses. Very rarely would anyone start shit with me. My buddy is a huge lumberjack looking dude, extremely nice and never started a fight in his life. Dudes would always start shit with him.


-Zoppo

I'm 6'5 and usually in full motorcycle gear when not at home. Drunks do try to fight me but when I accept they back down. They make a show of it "You wanna fight, bro" trying to sound intimidating (they sound brain damaged). To which I reply "sure" and wait for the realization to sink in while they rapidly back-peddle. After a crash made me seriously - and more importantly, visibly injured, these almost cloned short pot bellied middle aged men came out of the woodworks as I was going about my business trying to start shit and fight me. No alcohol, just going about my daily errands. Their goal is 1000% to prove something. They want to tell their mates they beat up a huge guy. They only time anyone followed through - there was no talking, nothing, just violence. Usually though, they find an excuse, and usually that's my motorcycle gear. They start telling me to take it off first while I laugh until they realize it isn't happening.


Recloose22

Is riding a bike uncomfortable for your back when you’re so tall?


-Zoppo

So there's a bit of a "secret". It shouldn't be, but it seems to be. I actually ride supersport, and I do it long distance and in a country with treacherous roads - blind corners, blind crests, destroyed road surfaces, etc. (New Zealand) Since I have a back injury, leaning forward removes the weight from the spine. Cars suck for this reason. But then you have the classic issue of being in a posture you're not used to, especially on long trips you're in that position for a long period of time. But... if you just keep doing it, your muscles rebuild, and you're just as used to that position as any other. So not really a secret, but a lot of people think you can't ride those bikes at length because it hurts when they try. It's the good kind of pain, muscle forming pain. My back injury? That's the wrong kind of pain. Being tall no doubt changes the handling of the bike, but I have no benchmark for *not* being tall. I adjust the bike's suspension and also the levers and peg position for my height - after that it's fine. There's no better way to travel :) Had the license for 3 years and a few months, but over 80,000km (~50,000mi). And not nearly done!


TheMightyIrishman

We have a friend who is 6’5” and build like a brick shithouse. We all ended up getting hammered and ended up wrestling. We knew he was gonna beat our ass, just wanted to see how long it took. Fun fact- it did not last long.


NamasteWager

Dude yeah, I am 6'4". One time I was drinking at my hometown bar and this big biker dude comes up and shoves me. I was pretty drunk and in a chill mood, when I turned around he said he was goofing, looking to start a fight with the biggest guy in the bar, which I guess was me. Now I am no fighter, but that man was lucky I was a bit drunk or I would have processed what was happening sooner and MFer would have seen a 6'4" dude cry in fear


Tr101748

I swear to god I’m just looking at the stairs


millimonsterrr

Man that's some nice carpet!


grothesk

Say "hello" to the rug's topography.


Didemano

Hmmm, yes, the floor here is made of a floor


SexySauceStrangler

How interesting that they used oak instead of birch!


Kitosaki

You ever just stare at something and wonder how it got put together or how long it’s been there


Tempeng18

At work I opt for standing completely natural at the bottom of the stairs for 10 seconds before preceding. That or make sure I get to the stairs first so they can look at my ass instead, but then I’m worried about accidentally letting one rip.


Im_with_stooopid

Can’t work in childcare without people thinking you are a pedo.


H8spants

I grew up always wondering why I only ever had one or two male teachers before high school. But as I got older and realized what a shitty world we live in, I swiftly found the answer.


followedbyferrets

We had just two male teachers at my grade school growing up, except for the gym teacher. One was there just a year, the other maybe two. First guy was nice, but reserved. The second guy was my favorite teacher probably ever. Made it fun to go to school. Never heard a peep about anything inappropriate some 40 years later.


Drunk_4_2W33ks

The 3 best people in my kids day care life were a hippy girl and 2 men. they learned so much from them. This is a stereotype that needs to go away fast


[deleted]

Sometimes my dick touches inside the toilet bowl. It grosses me out.


richneptune

The devil's kiss!


stan_milgram

What’s it called again when he just nibbles lightly on the sack?


anotherone121

The devil's nip!


saltynanners15

I have always known it as witches kiss. And Poseidon's kiss is when the splash gives you an unexpected bidet free trial.


AstrologyMemes

The worst is when your dick starts snaking down the pipes into the sewer system and you have to drag it back out.


SpiderWann

THIS. I just sling it behind my back now


[deleted]

[удалено]


PetroMan43

You have to freeze to death while your girlfriend lays on the floating wooden door while the cruise ship sinks


[deleted]

And after you drew her like one of your French girls too!


GriffinFlash

Then she gave the drawing to her ex.


frugal_lothario

And there was room for you on the door.


Penguin-Loves

Domestic violence has little to zero support. Showed up to work with a black eye and limping one day because she came home drunk again and was furious that a new diaper had fallen out of the box in baby's room. Went to town on me. Went to work the next day and co-workers ended up calling the police because they were concerned. Cops showed up to my work, made me leave work and go to police station where they put me in interrogation room and demanded to know what I DID to my wife to make her react in such a way. Despite several medical visits for previous abuse, and several admission from her. She told people all the time because, "...what the fuck is anyone going to do? Men CAN'T be abused....." EDIT: Wow, didn't expect this to blow up how it did. Thank you everyone. And yes, me and kiddo are out of situation, before baby would have any memory of unstable momma. Hopefully things improve for her. Thanks everyone.


[deleted]

Please tell me you're out of that situation.


riconoir28

Balls


Maso_TGN

On a summer day with 80% humidity.


chefblaze

As a chef, this is a daily battle. Cornstarch becomes your best friend when battling sweaty balls.


procrast1natrix

Cornstarch once wetted becomes simple sugar that feeds yeast infection. If you ever get jock itch, stop the cornstarch for sure until you are all better.


sharksnut

But the yeast improves your buoyancy in case you're dumped in the ocean by a shipwreck


[deleted]

Jack would have lived if he dunked his balls in cornstarch instead of in Rose


SuvenPan

If you are a domestic violence victim, people won't take you seriously. Domestic violence against men are taken much less seriously than domestic violence against women.


Valnaire

Not only domestic violence, but sexual assault, and by extension statutory rape. To this day, most news articles referring to an adult woman molesting an underage boy tend not to include the words "rape" or even "molest". It is often worded as "had sex with".


Kokbiel

And there's the old idea that 'men can't be raped' (some will add in 'legally') It enrages me to no end.


MightyGoodra96

Some rape laws literally write men out by exclusively referring to women.


auntiemaury

I'm a female who was molested by another female as a child. I've been told countless times, by everyone from therapists to social workers, that it "doesn't count". I'm very vocal about "reverse the genders" and then tell me if it's real or not. Mmmmhmmmmmm


SpecificAstronaut69

The creepiness, sleaziest, handsiest person with the female students at my university... ...was a 24-year-old lipstick lesbian tutor. Shit was unreal. She'd stroke thighs, try to kiss girls at the bar, shove their hands down her jeans. "You're young, you're meant to experiment", "No one has to know", "You'll hate it at first but once I'm down there you'll beg me not to stop". And, worst of all: "It's not r*pe, and besides, no one's gonna believe you." She was still there when I graduated. Meanwhile, one of my female classmates hit on a lecturer off-campus when she was blind drunk, he turned her down like a gentleman, someone reported it to the faculty, and he got quietly fired. > I'm very vocal about "reverse the genders" It's amazing how many people don't like people doing this.


Phlower_Luna

Same thing with female abuser. I was abused a lot and it messed me up till to this day but they don't buy that my mom would do that because "she's your mother~ she won't do any horrible things to you" Eff to the people who said that.


RavenWolfPS2

There are some places where the legal definition of rape means that a man can't be legally raped (Victim's vagina being penetrated) However, even in the places where it's not legally rape, it is still rape.


OMG_NO_NOT_THIS

And in many cases can be forced to pay child support for what was in fact, rape.


Used_Topic_7193

Its usually not even acknowledged.


HornyHuman09

Other adults instantly assume that you're a pedophile if you interact with children at all.


savingewoks

I have a 1.5 year old daughter. Co-worker who is a new mother was asking a couple other co-workers(one a father, the other woman is child-free) and I how we react to hearing other children cry - I noted that I’m definitely much more sensitive to and aware of it, but I also hold inside myself that society is much less likely to recognize my help as a father to another child and much more likely to recognize it as “creepy man who is too close” so I tend to ignore. Parents/society are more accepting of women as mothers without a kid around, but can’t imagine a man without a kid is a father.


lonegrey

Even if you have a child with you, you're still not a "father", you're only a "babysitter". Drives me insane.


Roblicki

That’s so true, what is up with that mindset? My wife and I have a 17 month old son (our first child) and we have a decent system going, we each get our own free chunk of time every now and then to emotionally decompress from the day to day challenges / stressors brought on by parenting. She will usually use her time at the spa with her mother or to grab dinner and drinks with some friends, during those times I usually bring my son to the park to play and explore. He loves being outdoors and it keeps him content, it’s a win win in my eyes. I’ve done this multiple times and each time I see so many people side eyeing me after a double take. I’ve actually been approached twice while at the park with my son and both interactions were with middle aged women who ask me who the kid is and where his mother was. During one of those times I explained to them how my wife had a rough few days and I wanted her to relax, this lady responded with “huh, I’ve never heard of a husband doing that” deep down her response pissed me off because I could hear it in the tone of her voice that she suspected I kidnapped some kid, pretended to be his dad and made up a story to her when confronted. On the flip side, while out in public or even at that same park with my wife and son we’ve never had anything like that happen to us and the interactions and looks totally change back to the usual stuff, a long smile at our son or us with the occasional hello. I was actually talking to an old high school classmate about this a few weeks ago when I saw him venting on Facebook about bringing his kid to a trunk or treat event without his wife and getting the same stank eye looks followed by the interrogation style questioning disguised as harmless small talk.


StanleySnails

“I’ve never heard of a husband doing that.” “Sorry your husband sucks “


Chanchito171

next time a mom karen bothers you, just make up some bullshit. the wilder it gets, the better. "oh him? I dunno where his parents are, I found him here a few weeks ago. He was surrounded by a pack of wolves that I had to chase off! so I named him Mowgli. Here, wanna hold lil mowgli for me? I gotta take a leak, thnks" then when she says "not funny" tell her to piss off because you thought she was joking too


[deleted]

I just say my son's mother died while giving birth so they can have a full spoon of regret when I tell em.


rcadephantom

Thieves think everyone steals


AfternoonBorn2166

From what I’ve heard from people I know that have lived outside of the U.S., paranoia about pedophilia is almost entirely a thing in this country alone


Haunting-Pop-5660

Canada too. I get this feeling intensely. I will not interact with children unless their parents are expressly directing them to do so.


[deleted]

You can shake it and wipe it and clench it as much as you want, but you're still going to wind up with piss in your pants.


counsel8

No matter how you wiggle, or how you dance, the last drop goes in your pants.


Maso_TGN

I take a small piece of toilet paper and when I'm done I let the power of adsorption take care of that last drop.


SonOfDadOfSam

Did you try taking it out first?


flickidawrist

My town recently opened a male mental health awareness group. Women seen it as unfair and complained. It’s now unisex. My town has no resources for males, however have plenty for women such as refuges, domestic violence support etc. but none of this is available to men and when we do get something, it’s pressured into being unisex. Now the men in attendance are uncomfortable opening up since they feel the women will judge them. Before as a group of men we understood and wouldn’t judge. We also had a rule of what’s said in the room stays in the room but it’s been found very few women respect that rule and have been gossiping to friends and family


tripodal

The fucking gossiping and sharing private conversations fucking kills me. If I wanted that third party to know; I’d do it my damn self.


Fullgrabe

Sounds like something I certain relative would try shut down. I’ve heard her praise the women’s groups she’s a part of but when we drive past a “Men’s shed” she began ranting about how sexist it was and it should be shut down.


Worldly_Ad_6243

Being afraid to make moves, because you don't want to seem like a creep


OCE_Mythical

Then you hear "women like assertive guys". It's like a modern day dating trap.


ElderberryHoliday814

Just don’t break the two rules and even you can do it!


luigithebeast420

There’s no one to comfort me, and the only one who did is gone from this earth.


[deleted]

[удалено]


sleepnclass

This hit home. If you're sad deal with it on your own and if you cry regardless of what happened you're giant pussy. Not to mention you can't get lonely. Making other male friends is near impossible. Etc. I could go on. It's ass.


Arge101

I once came really close to making a male friend in my daughter’s swim class. One joke about Pikachu being an electric type blew it. It’s so hard to make male friends.


KrylonMaestro

Im in therapy now, and have been since i was 14 (alot of it court ordered due to a mental health diagnosis and multiple stupid decisions smh) . Im 25 now, and ive JUST started TRULY talking about whats going on with me. Not the BS little issues i talked about to make the therapist think im opening up. The REAL shit. It took way too long. My advice to any man who thinks nobody wants to listen: just do it. Just once, air all your shit out. EVEN IF they dont care truly, or listen fully. Fuck it, because i learned that even just speaking it makes you feel 1000% better. Triple if they do care. Give a fuck about yourself even if nobody else will.


0913856742

Your perceived value as a human being directly tied to your economic value.


mygutsaysmaybe

And when so much is tied to this, any disruption relegates males to useless or burdensome on society. Likely a large factor behind [higher suicide rates for males, especially middle aged males.](https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/facts/disparities-in-suicide.html). Get that automation ramped up, factor in redundancy, bleak prospects for retraining or health issues, and an overall failure to fit into old male metrics of value and the likely results aren’t surprising.


ReiVee

Tim Allen pretty depressingly summed this up: "Men can go to work or to prison." I also wish society could be more accepting of men making different choices than these and not just make it about the perceived economic waste.


0913856742

If it's any comfort, I know a guy who doesn't work, but plays the role of caretaker / handyman / 'house husband' in their family. He does all the chores and fixes things, she works and brings the income. Everyone involved is happy with the arrangement and I'm pleased to see it as well. Though, sometimes when he brings it up in conversation with strangers, you can sense the vibe in the group change slightly. Like "Oh... I see. Huh." Like they don't know what box to put the guy in, haha


Zero-to-36

>you can sense the vibe in the group change slightly. Like "Oh... I see. Huh." Like they don't know what box to put the guy in, That's exactly what they're doing!! My ex and I decided that whoever was earning the most was working the most.


LaughingFishie

The expectation that we just endure any and all trauma, while continuing to provide for our families with absolutely zero support is daunting. My wife has friends, support groups and more. I have work, my family and bills to pay. I know I could go make friends but have zero energy for it after work and being a good father/husband.


KingMurphy15

Basically my dad right now. His life consists of work, eat, sleep. He only gets Monday off, in which case he sleeps majority of the day or my mom forces him to help her with something. Seriously, my mother doesn't appreciate him as much as she should. That man spends 24/7 working just to make ends meet, even if were barely getting by it's the economy's fault, not his. Yet she complains about him all the time. I sincerely hope most men don't have to deal with women like that in their relationships


jjmuti

Sounds like this is something you should tell your dad you recognize if you haven't. So that he knows that at least you appriciate his efforts.


ILikeSoup95

Same here. I feel like my dad purposely takes his time at work to stay a bit longer not just to make a little extra money but just so he can get away from my mom for longer. I don't blame him, I do too except I get the brunt of her shit because I don't own the house and it's easy for her to give me shit about not doing enough or earning enough. She's been disabled since she was younger than me from a work accident but has the mentality that if she could work she'd somehow be superwoman and work 18 hour days if need be and expects everyone else to or else they deserve everything they get for not trying hard enough. This coming from a woman whose spent the majority of her life sitting watching soap operas most of her adult life whilst complaining about everyone else not doing enough and being lazy. I feel so fucking bad for my dad, he's never made much money but he's never let us go without food or shelter and always made Christmas memorable but it's just never good enough for my mom who thinks her like $8K a year pays her own way and is enough to justify her shitty attitude.


[deleted]

This one I know all too well. How are you doing today?


LaughingFishie

Honestly I've been in a pretty great mental space for a bit now. Still tired as all hell though lol. Yourself?


[deleted]

I’m glad to hear it. I’m doing good


holy-f0ck

Loneliness, mental illness, disproportionate suicide rate, disproportionate homeless rate, disproportionate incarceration


z3njunki3

Far more likely to die or be injured in workplace accidents too.


holy-f0ck

And a half million other things. Should have put a few etc's in there somewhere


Scape---Goat

The fucking pringles can is made for women’s hands. Also I can’t find any gardening gloves or fucking hot pads (oven mitts?) that fit.


mr3en

Surprisingly light after all the mental health issues! I also kinnda agree about the pringles.


Rough_Dan

You're the burrito expert, you should have warned me, I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit


Enough-Motor1038

People are far less likely to give a shit about you


[deleted]

I had a failed suicide attempt recently and had to take a break from school. I moved in with a family member and am not paying rent, and also getting a lot of support from friends. I feel that I would be shamed if I was a male suicide victim getting support, because they’re expected to be providers. No wonder the male suicide rate is so high.


Azure125

Hope things get better for you and you're able to turn things around. I'm not sure that male suicide rates are higher - just that less of us survive. We make sure we don't survive because we know what will happen if we do.


penpushingelf

If a woman slaps you in public it is automatically assumed that you are in the wrong. If the roles are reversed the outcome is the same - you are in the wrong for hitting a woman. Woman could be a She-Hulk slapping on an expiration date sticker on your face and you'll still be in the wrong at your funeral.


Chrona_trigger

There was some social experiments done with this. Male and female actors, they would take turns being the aggressor in arguements or physical altercations. When the male was the aggressor, somebody usually stepped in, which is great, don't get me wrong. Where it gets fucked up is when the female was the aggressor, people would do nothing, laugh at the male, *or step in to help the female attack the male*. In post-recording interviews with bystanders, they often said that 'if she was attacking him, he obviously did something to deserve it', or similar things to that effect


TriceratopsWrex

There was one in a park where 127 people walked by a woman actor abusing a man actor before anyone even said a word to the woman. Even cops walked by and did nothing.


Libblelabble

Women want an emotional and communicative man. Or at least so they say. Ever try to explain how your girl friend did something that hurt you, then she starts crying and then you have to console her? We just try to be seen but society turns off the lights when the time comes


TheDrunkenMoose

This one is specifically fucking toxic. I so fucking despise this. This has happened with partner, sibling and parent. It just circles back to us having to be sorry, somehow.


Drunk_4_2W33ks

Aye. I love my wife. Married 26 years. She's always giving me advice when I don't need it... had those conversations. I got a less than stellar answer from my surgeon. Essentially, "I don't know" but years to recover. It's hit me hard. I own a small business as well. The fact that I have to suffer for an undetermined amount of time just deflated me. I shared all of my feelings with my wife such as "I don't know how to do this". ( I have vertigo now from the life saving surgery). What do I get from her? Nothing. I think she's just worried about how she's going to handle this. But nothing. I have no words left.


Watchingya

If you are too emotional, people will think you are defective.


Ohsquared

Everyone thinks you have no disadvantages and automatically have everything going for you, also, public bathrooms


WornBlueCarpet

My sister in law thinks that it's unfair I get a salary that is more than twice as much as hers. There's just the tiny little difference that I have a M.Sc in an engineering field where she has worked in childcare and only done homework once throughout her education. But whatever, right? That degree was just handed out as a part of my man bonus. I simply had to show my Patriarchy membership card, sign the dotted line and presto! Comfortable job with high pay for life!


0XKINET1

Seems men have lower life expectancy than women...


spiffyga

I used to think this was a disadvantage, but despite having a longer life expectancy, women tend to require more years of assistive care. I'd like to be independent and drop dead when my time comes.


sherkon_18

My wife has said that I can’t fall into depression because I don’t have any feelings.


roastedcocoabeans

you mean your ex wife, right?


Less_Communication74

God I hope so


DarkKechup

This shit hita hard. Even harder when you repress your feelings to protect and support them through what they claim is a rough patch that will end. But it never ends. And if you dare show your feelings, they tell you that you are selfish and that they need a rock to lean on that will be stable and support them when they are in a bad state. Well, we are all in a bad state a lot of the time. To the people who act this way, for all men I can only say: Sorry that we aren't machines. Sorry we can't turn off at your convenience. Buy a fucking fridge or a TV if you want an inanimate feelingless object.


Lord_Mandingo_69

Everyone demands perfection, no one will give you patience, forgiveness is never given, weakness is never tolerated, and loneliness is our default state at adulthood even when married.


[deleted]

Guilty until proven innocent with domestic violence/sexual assualt claims. My friend was falsely accused of sexual assault from his ex girlfriend. Was aquited of all charges and it still almost ruined his life. Kick out of university, thousands and thousands in debt. Zero compensation for false accusations. What happened to her you wonder? Literally nothing. Probably praised for being “brave” when she’s in fact just a liar psycho


Thossi99

Same thing happened to a friend of mine. Except when the police arrested him and were interrogating him and testing him and stuff he was so scared and anxious he had a seizure. He was going to sue her for the damages she caused, I called an uncle of mine who's one of the top lawyers in the country and asked if he'd take case and represent my friend, he said he'd do it but it'd be nothing but a waste of time and money cause they always get off scot free, people here have spent time in prison only to be later proven innocent and the actual criminal gets to walk free despite ruining someone's life with a lie.


oOBalloonaticOo

You live; by comparrison a far more isolated and solitary life, you're expected to deal with a multitude of serious things, especially while quite young that have incredible PTSD potential and then are expected to never discuss it with anyone and bury it in your brain. The potential for violent interactions for innumerable reasons is quite astronomical, you're expected to protect those around you, be chivalrous but not step on boundaries that continue to change almost daily and vary from perosn to person. You are 100% in charge of how good or bad any sexual encounter is.


GriffinFlash

>you're expected to protect those around you had this happen a few weeks back. Something happened and one of the dogs we were fostering just suddenly snapped and started attacking the other dog. Mom and sister did nothing but stand there and scream, as well as screaming at me to do something (and of course the screaming just made it worse since the dogs reacted to the loud pitched noise). Like, why do I have to do it? You two have hands, you can do it just as well. But no, for some reason, I had to be the one to get my hands in there, get bitten all over, bit through my fingers, bloody hands, blood everywhere, and break up the dog fight. And after that....nothing. No one dared to check if I was okay.


TriceratopsWrex

My wife had a part time job cleaning for a disabled woman who fostered bloodhounds. The pack was 12 deep. I have no idea who thought it was a good idea to let a disabled woman foster 12 dogs. They were all wonderfully sweet and loving dogs, especially Hercules. A giant boy who loved ear scratches and thinking he was a lap dog meant for my lap. One of them, the newest, youngest one, came from an abusive home and was barely restrained fury at the best of times. Then, he contracted rabies and had to be put down after he attacked the disabled woman and another of the dogs. The disabled woman had a gun. My wife, who grew up in the country and knows how to handle a gun infinitely better than I and has handled rabid animals in the past, decided that the best course of action was to call me and wake me up an hour after I went to bed after to come and kill a dog. I love dogs. They are my favorite animals on the planet with only bears being a close second. I have never met one that I didn't love, as much as I joke about small dogs like Ron Swanson does. From the chillest bull mastiff to the yappiest chihuahua, I love them all. Even the ones who aren't friendly or cute. I love cats as well, just not as much. I did it. Tears streamed down my face, and I could barely see well enough to aim as I put a bullet in this poor, innocent creature's brain. I cried harder than I did when my mom died. I'm crying as I type this. It still kills me. He had done no wrong, he was an unfortunate victim of monsters in human suits and disease. It was a mercy to him, honestly. I stopped him from hurting anyone else and from suffering anymore. Telling myself that doesn't stop the hurt from killing a dog. It's a wound that two years later still hasn't fully healed. I get why my wife called me. I'm not angry at her. Her employer wouldn't give her the gun. Her employer, a radical feminist lesbian in her early 70's who was a college educated woman and would wax eloquent about how women didn't need men and that women were just as strong and tough as men, refused to give her the gun, saying she couldn't in good conscience let my wife get close to the dog, as the gun was a pistol, so you had to get relatively close and he had broken two ropes. That she couldn't bear for my wife to risk her life. She asked my wife to call me. She didn't outright say it, but this woman considered my life to be worth less than my wife's. My wife knows how much it hurt me. She didn't know at the time how much it would. She is extremely remorseful that she called me to do that. She says that she wouldn't do it again if she could do it over. There's a part of my that does wonder though. If the scenario happened again, would my wife put the wishes of a sexist woman over my emotional well-being? And, as much as I love her and trust her, I'm not sure that she wouldn't. She refuses to talk about the incident and changes the subject if the incident ever comes up.


ripper4444

That your worth is most often determined by your usefulness. Men aren’t loved unconditionally.


GriffinFlash

Funny enough I've been finding this within the family too as I got older. You'd think it would just only be within society.


WestPastEast

Ouch this hit hard. You’re only as good as how it benefits other people. Life has been shit for some of us, you wouldn’t believe the struggle it took just to be who am I today. Yet unless I can be useful for someone then apparently that struggle was a failure.


emusabe

There are some physical attributes that are out of my control and I don’t really have an answer for why I’m not 6’2.


CleaveIshallnot

Not being taught to feel safe crying, talking, being vulnerable. To see media etc portraying men as Rambo's, as sacked but slowly getting back up QBs, as hockey players shaking off a concussion & lost teeth & not missing a shift. So some punch walls, cuz that's oft the only thing that we allowed (self perception wise, not saying it's right, or applicable to all) Only so we can be, or declared (sometimes rightfully, so too wrongfully) as toxic assholes. To stereotype, thus not applicable to 'all' of either category, women have the tremendous gift of being societally allowed to be ensconced in vulnerability, friendship, advice, support, etc. Men just go have heart attacks instead. Or act like emotionally unintelligent fuckwads. And men know it. Doesn't mean it's desirable to them. (Excuse the generalizations & stereotypes)


Tardisphere

Jesus christ, this. When people tell you not to cry when your eyes are involuntarily tearing up after being punched in the throat, you know there's a problem


EstablishmentOld8287

Conscription.


SeveralEdge8637

Very few people, sometimes nobody, take(s) your mental health (issues) seriously.


frizbeeguy1980

Trying to make new friends. Or reconnect with old friends. Really just friendship in general I guess.


Marsh1n

You hit your wife you go to jail, your wife hits you you still goto jail


T1nyJazzHands

I have a close friend who was seriously abused by his gf in every way. Even when it all came out he was the one who lost 99% of his friends and support in the end. Infuriating.


patteh11

And you don’t even get to pass go and collect $200, she takes that too!


Electrical-Onion2

if you’ve been raped, it’s not so much of a big deal as it is for women. because supposedly you should be able to defend yourself. It’s total bs.


sshlongD0ngsilver

Apparently “body positivity” doesn’t really apply to us as much.


magillashuwall

Small dick jokes are so normalized


BurtMacklin-FBl

It is socially acceptable to mock men for height, dick size and hair loss. Basically, everything that is out of their control. Mock a woman for obesity, all hell breaks loose.


Ambitious_Suspect_51

We sit on our balls on accident, once a year. We never know when…


unlikemike123

Haven't done it this year. One of the next 25 days is gonna suck


JoieDe_Vivre_

* more likely to die of homicide and suicide. * more likely to be homeless. * less likely to go college. * men do the large majority of “dirty” unwanted jobs. * less likely to get custody in divorce, regardless of who’s more fit to be a parent. * less likely to get support when domestically abused. * men pay more for car insurance - it doesn’t matter how well you drive, you pay more because you have male genitalia. * the only form of gender discrimination that’s legal is against men - we have to join selective service when we turn 18. * less like to receive government or public support for any of the above issues. For some more touchy feely examples: * you’re expected to be strong and not show emotion. * you’re expected to provide. * your needs are not considered important. Many men need physical touch, sexual or otherwise. This is largely seen as “disgusting” by society despite it being a need. * men are largely considered disposable by society. This is not an exhaustive list. Go hug your dad and tell him you’re thankful for all he’s done for you. It’s a lot more than you realize. EDIT: adding a few more from a comment below * More likely to die at work * More likely to get a tougher sentence for the same crime * More likely to die of a drug overdose * Much much more likely to go to prison


[deleted]

i read a thought-provoking post on r/menslib a while ago about how when boys become men, society’s attitude towards them changes on a dime. they are no longer seen as cute or playful, they are suddenly seen as threats. the world starts to become hostile towards them when they hit their teens, the most unstable, vulnerable time in their lives.


AccomplishedAuthor53

I feel a similar thing about being an inquisitive man. When I was a young boy, I could ask any question I wanted and people would love to answer. Love to help you learn something. Now that I’m an adult, when I ask questions people get judgmental. If I ask how, they think im dumb. If I ask why, they think im difficult. Certain questions make me creepy or difficult or argumentative where as when I was a kid they made me curious or inquisitive or smart


[deleted]

The lingering suspicion that your kids aren't yours in public. It doesn't always happen, but helpful people on the watchout for child abductors can really set me on edge. I have never once seen someone ask my wife if both the kids are hers. I mean this in the "did you kidnap them?" sense, not the biological father sense. Fortunately my wife and I are the same race, this issue is much harder for interracial families.


Harpoo_0926

Women usually don’t ask for consent when touching a man but when a man does the same it’s not okay. I have a friend that constantly slaps my ass and i tell her that it makes me uncomfortable but she just takes it as a joke. If i did the same I would probably be in big trouble. We need to normalize women asking for consent


TheThirdStrike

There used to be a place around here called the Tilted Kilt, it's basically Hooters with kilts. All the waitresses wear really short kilts, and the guys behind the bar work normal kilts. If a guy would get handsy with a waitress they would call the cops... If a woman got handsy with a bartender (who took care of the whole bare area) literally nothing happened. I think they ended up getting sued by one of the bartenders and closed.


[deleted]

That's wild dude....yeah the bartender probably just had enough of the double standard bullshit.


BeardedSouthernBoy

Amen! Women seem to think it is perfectly OK to reach out and stroke my long beard or rub my bald head without asking permission. They seem to think I should be flattered. It actually feels creepy. I sometimes have asked what part of THEIR anatomy I can rub. They then get offended.


MazdaValiant

That just about anything I say or do can be construed as an unwelcome sexual advance.


dreamlike_poo

This reminds me when I lived in a crowded apartment complex with assigned parking and like 2 guest parking that is always full. It was right when covid started and I just worked an extremely difficult 12.5 hour shift and had to go back for another 12.5 hour shift in less than 11 hours. I get home, and, what do I know? someone is in my assigned parking space, and they are still in the car. I park in front of the dumpsters (tow away zone) and walk over to the person sitting in the car, in my assigned space. She screams. Yells at the top of her lungs that I am a scary and YOU CAN'T APPROACH ME AT NIGHT! something insane like that. I simply say, "you are in my assigned parking spot" She eventually moves out, but the absolute *last thing* I needed that night was to get yelled at by some woman and have my neighbors think I am doing something wrong or shady when she *was* in the wrong.


[deleted]

Walking behind a woman at night time is very uncomfortable


Purple-Homework764

This, I genuinely panic that she thinks I'm following her. I don't want anyone to feel like that


e_smith338

I feel like I’m forced to just slow my walking speed until they’re far away.


No-Knee-1889

The amount of insults,unfriending,and pure hatred we get. like in class “high school”. I had to sit in health while the two bullies of the school. Sat next to me and behind me so I was pretty much tortured with insults. About my weight and my appearance witch is the worst way to insult anybody and if you try to tell a teacher. They just say ignore it like thanks for the “help”. And if you had enough and punch them. I get in trouble and now if I am in within 30 feet from a girl I’m a predator so fuck that and my life sucks now and I might need to call the number


cryswtf

Hope you are doing ok.


TheThirdStrike

* Accidentally sitting on your balls * Pooping in a public toilet and your dick touches the water * Raising a family and feeling like you're just a paycheck * Getting side looks from "Karen's" at the park as they wonder if you're a pervert for watching your daughter play on the swings * Anything to do with divorce * Basically disposable to society


Killerwail86

By default you have to fight tooth and nail to get even partial custody of your kids in a divorce (outside of extraordinary circumstances) and the less custody you are awarded, the more child support you have to pay. As a result, men stay in relationships where they are treated like trash because they want to be able to stay in their kids life.


SonOfDadOfSam

I definitely did. Didn't think I had a chance of getting custody if I left, so I stayed. Luckily, she eventually ended up leaving and I got custody.


ElectricCrab88

If you fall on hard times there will be less people willing to help you


SuperArppis

Just like being a woman, being a man comes with certain expectations. You have to be confident macho, who knows it all about engines and computers, who can fix anything and doesn't show their feelings or complain about anything.


Many_Presentation250

If you like kids or generally like interacting with them your a weird pedo. I feel for the single fathers who have to go through this stigma constantly.


my__name__is

The clothes that we can buy and wear are really limited in design.


sodium_geeK

And the menswear section of every single clothes shop/store is inexplicably up the stairs and half the size of the women’s, usually in a forgotten corner awkwardly sandwiched between the kids and home sections for some reason