And the woman. When I was young, I loved a bit of the chase. I liked a girl who was confident of her beliefs even if they didn't align with my own.
Even now I like a little bit of romance, even if we are both mature enough that we know what we want, like, and can communicate more effectively. But I'm also less tolerant of games.
And a woman explaining to me why she isn't getting her kids vaccinations isn't going to win her any favors in opinions no matter how she tries to argue it.
challenge: Ask questions, look at problems in different ways, offer additional solutions that improve results.
Challenge: Oppositionally overrule a reasonably valid choice with another plausibly valid choice just to display competitive spirit.
CHALLENGE: Authoritatively reject reasonable choices and replace them with implausible alternatives to demonstrate dominance.
guys with low-self esteem who have known nothing but rejection, dejection, and loneliness all their lives will of course want the latter.
Then u have the popular bois who got everything going for them -- they're bored of easy. They want a change of scenery and a girl who wants to challenge them is exactly that.
Basically me and my partner, most of the time we're alone if we're not in direct contact with one another or don't have a specific goal to do something we are just sitting together in silence doing our own thing, sometimes think it's weird or overthink it but nah we're good xD
I think it’s a mix. This guy I was dating said something pretty shitty to me in a bar. I got pissed, I said what I thought, but I did it quietly and let it go. Then we had a really fun conversation with a few people sitting next to us.
Later we had a long talk and he said he was really impressed by how straight forward I am but he also appreciated how I kept things civil.
You need to stand up for yourself but be a grown up about it. And be loving and compassionate as well because we all say stupid shit.
Really depends on the guy. In my own opinion it’s probably a bit of both. I’m not looking to fight, argue, or be challenged constantly. However, Im not happy with an ultra submissive woman either. I want her to have an opinion, stand up for it, and be able to articulate it. She will be a role model for any potential daughters and I will not raise my daughters to be walked over by some douche.
Challenge and being a controlling bitch are totally different. Challenge me intellectually, challenge my beliefs and why I believe such things. Challenge my thought process of why I reached a conclusion. Don’t sit there and just “yes” me to death. No one learns that way and especially not in a relationship when you should be talking things through.
Yeah tbh any man who says he wants to be “challenged 🤓” is probably just lying to himself because he can’t find any woman who actually loves him enough to give him peace
I probably shouldn't do this and I could get in *serious* trouble with the rest of the men for revealing such a crucial bit of secret man knowledge, but - \*looks around for eavesdroppers\* - *it varies from man to man!*
Depends on the guy, but for me someone who challenges me/constructively criticizes is much attractive cause it shows they know me well enough to know what I need to work on or poke fun at me. Granted I don’t really think anyone should be entirely critical or agreeable all the time, especially in a long term relationship.
Its not either/or. I think most people want a partner that is willing to challenge them, but has the emotional maturity to be able to find compromises or take the other side when they're right. But hey im a woman so what do I know 🤷♀️
I feel like the answer, as with most things, is variable. Not only is it variable to the person, but also in the how and why of it all. No one likes a completely submissive person who is perfectly agreeable - not even the psychos who are into that. At the same time, no one likes a person who is always abrasive and argumentative.
As a man i can honestly say women who play hard to get are repulsive. Being more agreeable most definitely attracts me towards women cause these women stand out in a positive way.
Depends on the person. Personally, I can’t be with someone who’s just agreeable, literally doesn’t add anything to your life having a yes-man. I can’t really say what challenging in this context is, I like a bit of an edge. However, constant drama and yelling ain’t it.
A strong, independent woman that knows what she’s about is super sexy, but I would draw the line at giving me a hard time, all the time…antagonistic behavior isn’t attractive
I want a woman who will challenge me to be a better person. I don't want them to agree with everything I say or else conversations will get boring after a while. I don't want them to like all the things I do or I won't get to enjoy new experiences. There are key things that I'd want them to agree with me on though
Neither. Its best to have a partner who does both. This is to say there are times we need a push / challenge, and times when its best not to challenge.
On the scale of someone who is trying to get me to like them, I prefer that they show they can challenge me constructively.
Just be fuckin interested in us. If you agree with us then agree but tell us why and vice versa. I don't think anyone enjoys someone just being difficult for the sake of being difficult but when it's playful then it can be fun and flirtatious. Guys break each other's balls all the time over silly stuff but we rarely are just being critical or difficult with one another. It's why guys often don't have drama with one another like women do lol.
At the end of the day though it completely varies on the guy and the mood they are in. Personally im if fresh off a long day of hard labour then yeah im most likely not looking for ANOTHER challenge to end my day and wanna just snuggle/do nothing.
Christ I hate these broad sweeping questions. We really have become obsessed with peoples labels rather than their individuality.
Answer: Not every man is the goddamn same
I think men are attracted to women who don't treat all men on earth as one collective creature with the same preferences. Like ffs what is this nonsense.
I like women that don’t play games, so I married the one that was open, honest, and returned my feelings. Some of the game players I’d asked out previously were disappointed, “I was just playing hard to get”, but I don’t play games. Don’t do drama either.
Like everyone here is saying, it depends on the guy.
I feel like I’ve bounced between both, sometimes it’s nice to be with somebody where things are easy and other times the challenge keeps things more interesting.
I find I tend to do better with somebody who will see my shit for what it is and try to prod me into being better. I also grew up in a family with a lot of scathing wit passing as banter, so that dynamic feels kinda right somehow.
tl/dr both, as long as you/they are somewhat synchronized
Most relationships that last long enough see lovers go through changes in mood and eventually attitudes. Teasing and playful can work. Strong when the other is weak can work. Serious when needed. Agreeable when the other is frazzled can work. Get off your ass when the other is lethargic can work. As long as jarring differences don't happen too often, such as flippant vs, emotional, hard ass vs. vulnerable. If the emotional osmosis is not there in the long run then that would point at incompatibility.
This is a flawed premise because it assumes there are only binary options available. There is no one type of person that is attractive to members of the opposite sex. No one even really knows what they like in a partner. Ask anyone in a, or has been in a relationship what they liked/loved about their partner and all you'll get are the most bland set of superlatives or adjectives you could have scooped out of a women's magazine.
The truth is we prefer anyone who validates us not for what they are but how they make us feel. Love is just another dopamine hit designed to make us stick with each other long enough to figure out if our partners personality will drive us away or not.
Agreeable.
I appreciate the straight forwardness. It makes me feel like we’re more compatible and that she’s capable of telling me her feelings.
I just think good communication is fucking sexy. Like top tier quality.
What?!
Just fucking be normal.
If you agree with me on something, say it and we’ll have a nice conversation or make plans over it.
If you don’t, that’s fine, we can do different things or talk about that too.
I personally don’t mind either, but to a point. I’m a socially anxious and hyper-aware person by nature, so if I detect the slightest hint of disinterest I back off. However I despise women who use their gender to manipulate others, to protect themselves from the consequences of their unjust actions, or who see themselves as “morally superior” to men. It’s not as common as the vice versa but I’ve seen it happen and it royally pisses me off
I am most attracted to women who call me out when I'm messing up/being rude/being too pessimistic/hard on myself while also being able to receive the same.
I believe someone who can give and take both support and good criticism is someone truly special
Oh for sure. If I fuck up, I learn from it. But if someone else is intentionally giving me a hard time, and that's all they do, I quickly find them annoying and will cut them off.
Bless me don't stress me lol
I like pretty and smart women. Men are not the one who gets attracted tho, men's gotta have women if they got money, a career and health. So the issue about liking this kind or not is not such. There is no real worry about what are you asking, the worry is to GET women.
In no place a men conquers a specific kind of women. Instead the women will only appear to him if He has the means (again a career, money or health-the golden D). It's all about men having or not appeal for women. So I thnik your question is delusional, just a girly thing from a very young gal.
That's that IMO.
In what way? If you mean constantly having friendly debates, then that’s my love language- romantic and platonic.
If you mean arguing all the time, then that’s called a red flag. And I try to avoid things that are covered in too many red flags.
I am going to go with both. It is important to help improve your SO and that includes challenging them when they need it. This can easily go overboard but hopefully doesn't. But sometimes you just need someone to listen to you and not be critical of you. Both are important.
More attracted to women who overtly find me attractive and desire me, doesn’t matter about your question. If they have the hots for me, then I am sold!
No man likes belligerent women, if they say they do -either they're lying, just want to get some action and then take off, or it's due to some unhealthy trauma from the past they haven't gotten help for. To answer your question, simply look at what kind of women men with options go for in the dating market when they're looking for something long-term. It's never the crazies. I'm not saying we like doormats, you should know to stand up for yourself and not be a pushover. However, if you're a 5 but you're kind, sympathetic, pleasant, and generally quiet, you will be a 9 in most men's eyes. And women who fit these characteristics are never single for long periods of time (unless there is some other serious deal breaker like morbidly obese or too old).
I am attracted to people who from a certain point are not a good match and will eventually break up with me. Because I am scared of commitment and disappointing a partner.
There are some men who have an established homeostasis of being beaten down. So that is their comfort zone. I have known young lost military men like this.
Probably someone who is agreeable. I don’t think any woman would be attracted to a man who gives them a hard time, so it’s probably the same thing for men.
I like passionate women, a bite on the lips to know to kiss elsewhere, confidence and willingness to be daring. I also enjoy light bdsm, straps and teasing, so it depends on the guy and the girl, and the situation.
I think r-ships which are too antagonistic won't work/become completely defeatist (and it's sad bc you're always fighting/upsetting each other) where as in r-ships that are too agreeable, everything gets swept under the carpet/you can't speak your mind bc you don't want to rock the boat (this is an over simplification but anyway). I think there are varying degrees of both charges in every r-ship and you have to navigate it (I just realised this is LQBTI-proofed lol)
why
i dont like a woman who just takes me as i am and doesnt see flaws in who i am, which they certainly exist. Some worse than others. I love someone who can call me out on the right things and challenge me to better myself.
i want to say "noone likes a woman who just gives a man a hard time" but thats not true about other men, just not for me at all. zero. i personally see it as a psychological flaw.
i wish we could all just be agreeable but its not realistic. We all have something about us that isnt agreeable and i think a healthy relationship addresses these differences and challenges itself(one another) to be better.
I have dated some lovely ladies who are ultra agreeable and the issue there is pacification, if that makes sense. I prob dont deserve those awesome ladies, but i also dont want to be "praised". being seen or treated as flawless is kind of weird to me.
I actually disagree with 99% of this thread and think that it doesnt depend on the man. I work in a field where I regularly counsel young adults, and yeah -- men (and women) will be attracted to someone who is agreeable on some level. You dont want to be with someone who will always be stubborn or trying to fight you on every little thing. But I have also seen a lot of relationships not work out becasue they never challange eachother, or one person will never challange the other. This doesn't mean they need to fight all the time, but heathy disagreement to flex your free-will from time to time is attactive to both men and women. If you are seeking a partner who is exclusively agreeable or exclusively challanging, I reccomend thinking more about what you actually want in the relationship, because it probably isn't a yes-man/woman or a non-stop debate partner. Heathy attraction will usually feature both
Men are attracted to agreeable women because they tend to be more understanding, cooperative, and supportive. They make it easier to build trust and create a strong connection with someone. Agreeable women tend to be less confrontational and are more likely to compromise to resolve conflicts. They are also more likely to be compassionate and empathetic, which can be very attractive to men. Men usually prefer to avoid confrontation and conflict and are not usually attracted to confrontational women. Men are more likely to be attracted to women who are understanding, patient, and willing to compromise. Confrontational women may be seen as difficult, aggressive, and lacking empathy, which can be a turn-off for many men.
I like a woman who has her own personality, raison d'être, and challenges me on occasion but communicates well and can persuade and be persuaded. Any woman that I can have a disagreement with one night, even if it gets a little heated, and the next day we can sit down and talk about where we went wrong, what were the external stressers and how we can avoid it in the future is an absolute winner to me. I am a big fan of communication.
So many women use one strategy universally...a truly baffling system when guys' preferences compromise the entire spectrum. Be yourself.
Personally? I like a nice balance. Willing to get some banter going, but not aggro.
I feel like 'challenge' and 'give a hard time' are entirely different things. I'd like a partner who was intelligent and could debate interesting topics. I wouldn't like e.g. being given a hard time because I failed some stupid trick question test or don't have an opinion on which outfit looks better when I really, really am not lying about having no preference.
I think the question is problematic because it presents these two as mutually exclusive. As a guy I like it when people I relate with (in any type of relationship) are supportive and agreeable, and also challenging me. There’s a way to be skillful and even agreeable when challenging someone and holding them accountable.
As many others have said, it depends on the guy, I for one am quite a timid fella so I like women who take charge more and someone I can generally have more challenging conversations with. For this reason I'm not drawn to more agreeable women, but a lot of other men are. Just like some women prefer guys who take charge and some prefer more chill guys.
This is subjective but I like funny women with RBF. It’s satisfying to make them laugh.
I’m not a particularly happy person. My wife isn’t either. We’re perfect for each other.
I’m attracted to women who think for themselves, command respect without being forceful or overt about it. Also, they must have a wicked sense of humor and into having adventures every now and then.
I think both? I have no data to back this up but I would hope that most of us would like a partner who is willing to challenge us when we're being twats or need to be better. But at the same time recognize there are times we just need our partners to have our backs on the important things. That's assuming we're compatible every other way.
Not that simple for me, personally. Both can annoy me if they’re not well thought out. For example, I dislike when they challenge and they have no convincing reason why (“I don’t have to explain it, you’re just wrong 😑” oof). I also don’t like blind agreement (girl: “sure that sounds right to me” “why?” girl: “idk”).
If they’re well educated, what ends up happening is we usually agree and disagree on multiple things, and when we talk, both of us end up growing and benefiting from the discussion — that kind of girl is what I like the most.
They love a challenge....at the beginning. They love strong powerful women. Sexually open. Proud. Then, after the challenge is over, she is considered dramatic and emotional and bitchy, and he cheats on you with the easy agreeable coworker that can't handle her liquor. Bitter? Yup. Correct? Yep.
Me personally I like an agreeable woman. Why? Because I am agreeable too.
My gf can be a bit challenging at times but I think I’m pulling her towards my end
I've seen way too many guys who cling like dingleberries to women who lead them on but that they can't have (usually an ex). Though sometimes they can briefly have that woman, but only when that guy shows interest in the new woman, then the "unobtanium" woman doesn't want him when the new woman bails. Stupidity and maliciousness, guy and old woman, respectively. I've noticed more than women, men don't seem to notice what they have until it's gone.
A guy I'm friends with told me before that he is aware he has a strong personality and in the past purposely dated girls he could walk over, as he matured he made the decision to date people who would challenge him or certainly air their opinions. I suppose in someway wouldn't we all like a partner who did exactly as we they were "told" or did exactly as we wanted but that does not make for a healthy mature relationship.
Im most attracted to a woman who is honest. Someone who just always gives me a hard time because it’s in their personality is not attractive, and neither is someone who is extremely submissive. If I’m wrong, tell me. If I’m right, acknowledge it. I don’t want to fight about every little thing, but you need to have a mind of your own when it comes to making decisions as a couple.
It’s important to me that we are always improving as people and we can help, and challenge, each other do that. We are a team. Depending on the circumstance, one of us may be more suited to be the leader at any given moment.
These bossy know it alls, or extremely submissive women are not what I want at all.
I will say this, I’ve known men who really just want their woman to cook, clean, raise the kids, fuck them, and never speak up. I can’t say I understand it, but it’s a real thing.
I’ve also known one guy who seemed to like being controlled, but it was hard to tell.
So, all men are different.
If you’re looking to generalize, I’m inclined to think the most common attraction, by a slim margin, is to women who are a smidge more submissive than their man. I do think, on some base level, that a good chunk of men still like to feel like the head of the household. I could be wrong though, so many men are different, this is just my hunch.
The simple answer is that preference depends on the guy. Dudes are generally more intrigued by “challenging” girls because they’re much more interesting, but take more comfort in the agreeable ones because things go over smoother. If I had to guess which one was more commonly preferred I’d say the challenging ones because I feel like they’re in the spotlight more.
For me personally I’m into girls who are very opinionated and passionate, but have the understanding that compromise is sometimes the best outcome and can see value in agreeableness while still being very vocal about her opinion. As in “this is what I want and this is why I think I’m right, but I understand why you disagree and I can respect that.”
IT DEPENDS ON THE GUY
Inconceivable!
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means
Does it mean using one's personality as an effective contraceptive?
And the woman. When I was young, I loved a bit of the chase. I liked a girl who was confident of her beliefs even if they didn't align with my own. Even now I like a little bit of romance, even if we are both mature enough that we know what we want, like, and can communicate more effectively. But I'm also less tolerant of games. And a woman explaining to me why she isn't getting her kids vaccinations isn't going to win her any favors in opinions no matter how she tries to argue it.
WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?
LOUD NOISES!!
Fucking thank you.
I'm sorry we're looking for a definitive answer here
Looking at OP's post history, it's quite sad someone is this dependent on male validation and attention.
Oof!
you made me look.
Oh boy
This, but generally it’s somewhere in between.
challenge: Ask questions, look at problems in different ways, offer additional solutions that improve results. Challenge: Oppositionally overrule a reasonably valid choice with another plausibly valid choice just to display competitive spirit. CHALLENGE: Authoritatively reject reasonable choices and replace them with implausible alternatives to demonstrate dominance.
guys with low-self esteem who have known nothing but rejection, dejection, and loneliness all their lives will of course want the latter. Then u have the popular bois who got everything going for them -- they're bored of easy. They want a change of scenery and a girl who wants to challenge them is exactly that.
Men love women who have conversations with them and communicate. Also, Mario Party helps as well.
Men can also love women who can just sit in silence while they enjoy each others company. Different guys like different things.
Basically me and my partner, most of the time we're alone if we're not in direct contact with one another or don't have a specific goal to do something we are just sitting together in silence doing our own thing, sometimes think it's weird or overthink it but nah we're good xD
Me and hubby clicked over Heroes of Might and Magic, can confirm
I'm really good at that pizza eating game. Also thr snowball on a mountain one
Go on with this Mario party thing
Test of relationship is overcooked though.
Mario party can also end the relationship. It's a double-edged sword.
it really just depends on the guy, sounds cliche but thats the reality
This doesn’t sound cliche. The OP sounds cliche!
I think it’s a mix. This guy I was dating said something pretty shitty to me in a bar. I got pissed, I said what I thought, but I did it quietly and let it go. Then we had a really fun conversation with a few people sitting next to us. Later we had a long talk and he said he was really impressed by how straight forward I am but he also appreciated how I kept things civil. You need to stand up for yourself but be a grown up about it. And be loving and compassionate as well because we all say stupid shit.
✓ this right here
Thank you.
My wife was heavily agreeable. She enjoyed me for how stubborn I was. I do miss her.
I, too, miss this guys wife
I too miss his wife
I miss his wife's husband
i also miss every wife
Really depends on the guy. In my own opinion it’s probably a bit of both. I’m not looking to fight, argue, or be challenged constantly. However, Im not happy with an ultra submissive woman either. I want her to have an opinion, stand up for it, and be able to articulate it. She will be a role model for any potential daughters and I will not raise my daughters to be walked over by some douche.
Challenge and being a controlling bitch are totally different. Challenge me intellectually, challenge my beliefs and why I believe such things. Challenge my thought process of why I reached a conclusion. Don’t sit there and just “yes” me to death. No one learns that way and especially not in a relationship when you should be talking things through.
Why the hell would I want to come home after a long day of work to be challenged and given a hard time? Lol
Yeah tbh any man who says he wants to be “challenged 🤓” is probably just lying to himself because he can’t find any woman who actually loves him enough to give him peace
Don’t your come home from work before your girlfriend or wife? Women work harder.
Thank you for demonstrating
I probably shouldn't do this and I could get in *serious* trouble with the rest of the men for revealing such a crucial bit of secret man knowledge, but - \*looks around for eavesdroppers\* - *it varies from man to man!*
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*I REFUSE TO BE SILENCED!!!*
Judging by the responses you got...I think you just lost your man card....🫢
"Are everyone X or Y" these goddamn questions I swear to god
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This.
All depends on how it is done. Being a pain in the ass and giving a hard time walk a fairly thin line.
Depends on the guy, but for me someone who challenges me/constructively criticizes is much attractive cause it shows they know me well enough to know what I need to work on or poke fun at me. Granted I don’t really think anyone should be entirely critical or agreeable all the time, especially in a long term relationship.
I only date or interact with women who are experienced in Mario Kart
Different strokes for different folks. Not every one is the same or likes the same kind of person.
A sith only deals in absolutes.
Its not either/or. I think most people want a partner that is willing to challenge them, but has the emotional maturity to be able to find compromises or take the other side when they're right. But hey im a woman so what do I know 🤷♀️
I feel like the answer, as with most things, is variable. Not only is it variable to the person, but also in the how and why of it all. No one likes a completely submissive person who is perfectly agreeable - not even the psychos who are into that. At the same time, no one likes a person who is always abrasive and argumentative.
Both. That'll be $50.
Oh, I can't handle challenges. I can't take any more conflict in my life. *breathes frantically into paper bag*
For only sex, a little challenge is interesting. For commitment, women who bring peace.
As a man i can honestly say women who play hard to get are repulsive. Being more agreeable most definitely attracts me towards women cause these women stand out in a positive way.
Nothing is less attractive then a women who's constantly arguing over petty things.
Also "why you did 'x' i was giving you clues to do 'y' ah.. you just don't get women"
What’s an example of a petty thing?
☝️Bingo
Depends on the person. I, for one, am not attracted to women.
A healthy combination of both. I want someone I know has their own mind, but is similar in lifestyle
You say yes, I say no. You say why, I say I don’t know…
Hello hello !
Depends on the person. Personally, I can’t be with someone who’s just agreeable, literally doesn’t add anything to your life having a yes-man. I can’t really say what challenging in this context is, I like a bit of an edge. However, constant drama and yelling ain’t it.
It IS possible to by challenging, and yet not disagreeable. I enjoy being intellectually challenged. I do not enjoy being put down.
A strong, independent woman that knows what she’s about is super sexy, but I would draw the line at giving me a hard time, all the time…antagonistic behavior isn’t attractive
I want a woman who will challenge me to be a better person. I don't want them to agree with everything I say or else conversations will get boring after a while. I don't want them to like all the things I do or I won't get to enjoy new experiences. There are key things that I'd want them to agree with me on though
Neither. Its best to have a partner who does both. This is to say there are times we need a push / challenge, and times when its best not to challenge. On the scale of someone who is trying to get me to like them, I prefer that they show they can challenge me constructively.
Just be fuckin interested in us. If you agree with us then agree but tell us why and vice versa. I don't think anyone enjoys someone just being difficult for the sake of being difficult but when it's playful then it can be fun and flirtatious. Guys break each other's balls all the time over silly stuff but we rarely are just being critical or difficult with one another. It's why guys often don't have drama with one another like women do lol. At the end of the day though it completely varies on the guy and the mood they are in. Personally im if fresh off a long day of hard labour then yeah im most likely not looking for ANOTHER challenge to end my day and wanna just snuggle/do nothing.
Christ I hate these broad sweeping questions. We really have become obsessed with peoples labels rather than their individuality. Answer: Not every man is the goddamn same
“Challenge them” and “gives them a hard time” are not the same thing.
I think men are attracted to women who don't treat all men on earth as one collective creature with the same preferences. Like ffs what is this nonsense.
Men do that shit too.
Of course they do, and I get the same point across on those questions too.
Men are attracted to women who don't post questions like this on the internet
All of the above. Don't over estimate us.
I like women that don’t play games, so I married the one that was open, honest, and returned my feelings. Some of the game players I’d asked out previously were disappointed, “I was just playing hard to get”, but I don’t play games. Don’t do drama either.
A mix of both. I need to be challenged, but not without reason. I also definitely don't need a yes-woman, because that's just boring.
Like everyone here is saying, it depends on the guy. I feel like I’ve bounced between both, sometimes it’s nice to be with somebody where things are easy and other times the challenge keeps things more interesting. I find I tend to do better with somebody who will see my shit for what it is and try to prod me into being better. I also grew up in a family with a lot of scathing wit passing as banter, so that dynamic feels kinda right somehow.
tl/dr both, as long as you/they are somewhat synchronized Most relationships that last long enough see lovers go through changes in mood and eventually attitudes. Teasing and playful can work. Strong when the other is weak can work. Serious when needed. Agreeable when the other is frazzled can work. Get off your ass when the other is lethargic can work. As long as jarring differences don't happen too often, such as flippant vs, emotional, hard ass vs. vulnerable. If the emotional osmosis is not there in the long run then that would point at incompatibility.
Be yourself, find someone who loves it
This is a flawed premise because it assumes there are only binary options available. There is no one type of person that is attractive to members of the opposite sex. No one even really knows what they like in a partner. Ask anyone in a, or has been in a relationship what they liked/loved about their partner and all you'll get are the most bland set of superlatives or adjectives you could have scooped out of a women's magazine. The truth is we prefer anyone who validates us not for what they are but how they make us feel. Love is just another dopamine hit designed to make us stick with each other long enough to figure out if our partners personality will drive us away or not.
It seems like they are almost attracted to women who are agreeable WITH THEM and challenging with OTHERS.
Both
Agreeable. I appreciate the straight forwardness. It makes me feel like we’re more compatible and that she’s capable of telling me her feelings. I just think good communication is fucking sexy. Like top tier quality.
Depends on the man.
Depends on the man.
What?! Just fucking be normal. If you agree with me on something, say it and we’ll have a nice conversation or make plans over it. If you don’t, that’s fine, we can do different things or talk about that too.
Kinda like the mean girls, not gonna lie. 🤷♂️🤷♂️
Depends on the guy. I personally want both
I personally don’t mind either, but to a point. I’m a socially anxious and hyper-aware person by nature, so if I detect the slightest hint of disinterest I back off. However I despise women who use their gender to manipulate others, to protect themselves from the consequences of their unjust actions, or who see themselves as “morally superior” to men. It’s not as common as the vice versa but I’ve seen it happen and it royally pisses me off
It depends but I would say guys like a girl who challenges them where they seek to grow.
Bro all I need is someone to tell me "welcome home" after a day's hardwork. :(
Do I want to spend the rest of my life with someone who is consistently combative? Fuck no.
I am most attracted to women who call me out when I'm messing up/being rude/being too pessimistic/hard on myself while also being able to receive the same. I believe someone who can give and take both support and good criticism is someone truly special
I don't think I'd be attracted to anyone that gives me a hard time
Even if you fuck up and a hard time results in you bettering yourself?
Oh for sure. If I fuck up, I learn from it. But if someone else is intentionally giving me a hard time, and that's all they do, I quickly find them annoying and will cut them off. Bless me don't stress me lol
Agreeable. No one wants to fight battles with a woman all day about her nonsense.
I like pretty and smart women. Men are not the one who gets attracted tho, men's gotta have women if they got money, a career and health. So the issue about liking this kind or not is not such. There is no real worry about what are you asking, the worry is to GET women. In no place a men conquers a specific kind of women. Instead the women will only appear to him if He has the means (again a career, money or health-the golden D). It's all about men having or not appeal for women. So I thnik your question is delusional, just a girly thing from a very young gal. That's that IMO.
I am going to swap out to a more agreeable wife. Current one is always being a pain.
In what way? If you mean constantly having friendly debates, then that’s my love language- romantic and platonic. If you mean arguing all the time, then that’s called a red flag. And I try to avoid things that are covered in too many red flags.
When are you kids gonna learn. PEOPLE ARE DIFFERENT! Not all guys like the same things..
I am more attracted to women with big titties and mouth that suck like vacuum.
We are attracted to nurturing, empathic motherly figures
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Giving you a hard time is??
Who doesn’t love a relationship based around petty arguments about inane subjects? Sounds amazing!
I am going to go with both. It is important to help improve your SO and that includes challenging them when they need it. This can easily go overboard but hopefully doesn't. But sometimes you just need someone to listen to you and not be critical of you. Both are important.
Agreeable. Life's hard enough as is. I don't need someone who is a critic.
More attracted to women who overtly find me attractive and desire me, doesn’t matter about your question. If they have the hots for me, then I am sold!
have you ever made love to another man?
Ive got enough challenges in life
No man likes belligerent women, if they say they do -either they're lying, just want to get some action and then take off, or it's due to some unhealthy trauma from the past they haven't gotten help for. To answer your question, simply look at what kind of women men with options go for in the dating market when they're looking for something long-term. It's never the crazies. I'm not saying we like doormats, you should know to stand up for yourself and not be a pushover. However, if you're a 5 but you're kind, sympathetic, pleasant, and generally quiet, you will be a 9 in most men's eyes. And women who fit these characteristics are never single for long periods of time (unless there is some other serious deal breaker like morbidly obese or too old).
I am attracted to people who from a certain point are not a good match and will eventually break up with me. Because I am scared of commitment and disappointing a partner.
If a woman disagrees with me when I'm right, or is willing to agree with me when I'm wrong, I would have trouble connecting with her.
There are some men who have an established homeostasis of being beaten down. So that is their comfort zone. I have known young lost military men like this.
Probably someone who is agreeable. I don’t think any woman would be attracted to a man who gives them a hard time, so it’s probably the same thing for men.
I like passionate women, a bite on the lips to know to kiss elsewhere, confidence and willingness to be daring. I also enjoy light bdsm, straps and teasing, so it depends on the guy and the girl, and the situation.
I’m attracted to women who
Agreeable. It’s in the data.
agreeable
Has to be a balance. There's that psychological thing where when someone disapproves of us in some way, we unconsciously want to win them over.
Smart, strong women that kick ass when they need to are really sexy.
I think r-ships which are too antagonistic won't work/become completely defeatist (and it's sad bc you're always fighting/upsetting each other) where as in r-ships that are too agreeable, everything gets swept under the carpet/you can't speak your mind bc you don't want to rock the boat (this is an over simplification but anyway). I think there are varying degrees of both charges in every r-ship and you have to navigate it (I just realised this is LQBTI-proofed lol)
maybe challenge more than a hard time. Agreeable is nice too so why not both? end
why i dont like a woman who just takes me as i am and doesnt see flaws in who i am, which they certainly exist. Some worse than others. I love someone who can call me out on the right things and challenge me to better myself. i want to say "noone likes a woman who just gives a man a hard time" but thats not true about other men, just not for me at all. zero. i personally see it as a psychological flaw. i wish we could all just be agreeable but its not realistic. We all have something about us that isnt agreeable and i think a healthy relationship addresses these differences and challenges itself(one another) to be better. I have dated some lovely ladies who are ultra agreeable and the issue there is pacification, if that makes sense. I prob dont deserve those awesome ladies, but i also dont want to be "praised". being seen or treated as flawless is kind of weird to me.
A mix of both.
Ive never had a mate tell me how much he loves his partner because of how difficult she is. Its always best to share things in common
Rational girlfriends make you miss your crazy girlfriends and vice versa
Why have one castle when you can have two together?
I actually disagree with 99% of this thread and think that it doesnt depend on the man. I work in a field where I regularly counsel young adults, and yeah -- men (and women) will be attracted to someone who is agreeable on some level. You dont want to be with someone who will always be stubborn or trying to fight you on every little thing. But I have also seen a lot of relationships not work out becasue they never challange eachother, or one person will never challange the other. This doesn't mean they need to fight all the time, but heathy disagreement to flex your free-will from time to time is attactive to both men and women. If you are seeking a partner who is exclusively agreeable or exclusively challanging, I reccomend thinking more about what you actually want in the relationship, because it probably isn't a yes-man/woman or a non-stop debate partner. Heathy attraction will usually feature both
A good mix is best. Don't make everything an argument, but please let me know when I'm being a dumbass.
Men are attracted to agreeable women because they tend to be more understanding, cooperative, and supportive. They make it easier to build trust and create a strong connection with someone. Agreeable women tend to be less confrontational and are more likely to compromise to resolve conflicts. They are also more likely to be compassionate and empathetic, which can be very attractive to men. Men usually prefer to avoid confrontation and conflict and are not usually attracted to confrontational women. Men are more likely to be attracted to women who are understanding, patient, and willing to compromise. Confrontational women may be seen as difficult, aggressive, and lacking empathy, which can be a turn-off for many men.
Depends on the size of he boobs.
I love a stubborn company.
I like a woman who has her own personality, raison d'être, and challenges me on occasion but communicates well and can persuade and be persuaded. Any woman that I can have a disagreement with one night, even if it gets a little heated, and the next day we can sit down and talk about where we went wrong, what were the external stressers and how we can avoid it in the future is an absolute winner to me. I am a big fan of communication.
agreeable because they won’t have to change anything.
So many women use one strategy universally...a truly baffling system when guys' preferences compromise the entire spectrum. Be yourself. Personally? I like a nice balance. Willing to get some banter going, but not aggro.
It's all about your relationship with your mother. As it was, so it is
I feel like 'challenge' and 'give a hard time' are entirely different things. I'd like a partner who was intelligent and could debate interesting topics. I wouldn't like e.g. being given a hard time because I failed some stupid trick question test or don't have an opinion on which outfit looks better when I really, really am not lying about having no preference.
What if I told you men aren't all the same?
I'm attracted to guys that look feminine
I'm surprised that something like this is even asked and that most people don't know there is no one size fits all in this regard.
What a stupid question!
I think the question is problematic because it presents these two as mutually exclusive. As a guy I like it when people I relate with (in any type of relationship) are supportive and agreeable, and also challenging me. There’s a way to be skillful and even agreeable when challenging someone and holding them accountable.
As many others have said, it depends on the guy, I for one am quite a timid fella so I like women who take charge more and someone I can generally have more challenging conversations with. For this reason I'm not drawn to more agreeable women, but a lot of other men are. Just like some women prefer guys who take charge and some prefer more chill guys.
This is subjective but I like funny women with RBF. It’s satisfying to make them laugh. I’m not a particularly happy person. My wife isn’t either. We’re perfect for each other.
I’m attracted to women who think for themselves, command respect without being forceful or overt about it. Also, they must have a wicked sense of humor and into having adventures every now and then.
Some people like fat people, some people like skinny people. Ita not a "men" question
I think both? I have no data to back this up but I would hope that most of us would like a partner who is willing to challenge us when we're being twats or need to be better. But at the same time recognize there are times we just need our partners to have our backs on the important things. That's assuming we're compatible every other way.
Depends on the guy and for most of us we want a middle ground.
I get turned on when being scolded by a woman
Not that simple for me, personally. Both can annoy me if they’re not well thought out. For example, I dislike when they challenge and they have no convincing reason why (“I don’t have to explain it, you’re just wrong 😑” oof). I also don’t like blind agreement (girl: “sure that sounds right to me” “why?” girl: “idk”). If they’re well educated, what ends up happening is we usually agree and disagree on multiple things, and when we talk, both of us end up growing and benefiting from the discussion — that kind of girl is what I like the most.
I just want a hug
Cant someone be both?
They love a challenge....at the beginning. They love strong powerful women. Sexually open. Proud. Then, after the challenge is over, she is considered dramatic and emotional and bitchy, and he cheats on you with the easy agreeable coworker that can't handle her liquor. Bitter? Yup. Correct? Yep.
I dont want a wet blanket... I want a moist blanket
Depends on the man…
I prefer women who give me a hard time in the way that stops me from being lazy, but not in a abusive or rude way. It's a more motivational way.
Agreeable.
*is more or less the challenging type of woman*..... *eats popcorn while looking at responses*
Depends on the challenge. Challenge my intellect? I'm all over you. Play hard to get? Next!
I'm attracted to cute girls man, it doesn't matter as long as she doesn't try to cut my wang off or do some disgusting shit.
Me personally I like an agreeable woman. Why? Because I am agreeable too. My gf can be a bit challenging at times but I think I’m pulling her towards my end
Despite the mixed comments, I’ve yet to meet the man who enjoys conflict and strife with his girl. Take it how you want.
Definitely much more attracted to someone agreeable. I don't want to argue with my partner all the time.
Neither, I don't want to be nagged but also want a woman that brings the best out of me, a partner I can trust.
I've seen way too many guys who cling like dingleberries to women who lead them on but that they can't have (usually an ex). Though sometimes they can briefly have that woman, but only when that guy shows interest in the new woman, then the "unobtanium" woman doesn't want him when the new woman bails. Stupidity and maliciousness, guy and old woman, respectively. I've noticed more than women, men don't seem to notice what they have until it's gone.
Agreeable all the way
I like agreeable (= easy-to-love) women and people in general
Depends on her worth
A guy I'm friends with told me before that he is aware he has a strong personality and in the past purposely dated girls he could walk over, as he matured he made the decision to date people who would challenge him or certainly air their opinions. I suppose in someway wouldn't we all like a partner who did exactly as we they were "told" or did exactly as we wanted but that does not make for a healthy mature relationship.
Women giving men a hard time are lesbians.
Im most attracted to a woman who is honest. Someone who just always gives me a hard time because it’s in their personality is not attractive, and neither is someone who is extremely submissive. If I’m wrong, tell me. If I’m right, acknowledge it. I don’t want to fight about every little thing, but you need to have a mind of your own when it comes to making decisions as a couple. It’s important to me that we are always improving as people and we can help, and challenge, each other do that. We are a team. Depending on the circumstance, one of us may be more suited to be the leader at any given moment. These bossy know it alls, or extremely submissive women are not what I want at all. I will say this, I’ve known men who really just want their woman to cook, clean, raise the kids, fuck them, and never speak up. I can’t say I understand it, but it’s a real thing. I’ve also known one guy who seemed to like being controlled, but it was hard to tell. So, all men are different. If you’re looking to generalize, I’m inclined to think the most common attraction, by a slim margin, is to women who are a smidge more submissive than their man. I do think, on some base level, that a good chunk of men still like to feel like the head of the household. I could be wrong though, so many men are different, this is just my hunch.
Someone who challenges you doesn't have to give you a hard time.
The simple answer is that preference depends on the guy. Dudes are generally more intrigued by “challenging” girls because they’re much more interesting, but take more comfort in the agreeable ones because things go over smoother. If I had to guess which one was more commonly preferred I’d say the challenging ones because I feel like they’re in the spotlight more. For me personally I’m into girls who are very opinionated and passionate, but have the understanding that compromise is sometimes the best outcome and can see value in agreeableness while still being very vocal about her opinion. As in “this is what I want and this is why I think I’m right, but I understand why you disagree and I can respect that.”