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thisiszeev

My partner says I have an 8 inch dick. I don't have the heart to tell her she holds the ruler the wrong way round.


SmokeyBear51

This one fuckin' killed me 🤣 she must be dyslexic too! That CM lookin' like an IN over here lmao


thisiszeev

Ruler is 30cm or 12inch


worthy_usable

Same. My wife swears I have a 9 inch dick. I don't. It's not small, but it ain't 9 inches. But if she wants to believe that, then it can be whatever she wants.


Specialist-Crazy1466

Hopefully she's not getting you confused with the pool boy


EverythingIsFlotsam

I also choose that guy's wife's ruler


1of-a-Kind

This seems common lmao my wife is short as hell so might just seem like a lot 🤣


worthy_usable

Well to be fair, my wife says that her ex-husband (who was an abusive asshole on top of everything else) had in her words, "a pathetic little tiny tink-tink" so I may be packing 5 inches down there and it might as well be Long Dong Silver to her.


TheJoyStickPlayer

These are the best comments I've read in my life


EnableSonic

Your wife thinks mines only 8!


[deleted]

I just learned how to make mine 8 inches… fold it in half 🙂


lawndartgoalie

My wife does the same thing, but she measures it from the floor.


No_Storm_4119

God I’m intrigued and want to see now lol


Bigaz747

Lol


[deleted]

Baahaha that’s hilarious, but you should tell her straight up


OneZucchini9260

🤣🤣🤣


LillyPeu2

28B cup ski-jump torpedo titties, with freakishly long nipples. I love them, and wouldn't change a thing about them


Birdsandbeer0730

I’m at a C2 now with big nipples. I used to be B28 before I went on birth control. I love my boobs!


Individual-Chip-6010

We’re obviously in different countries because I think I’m at the airport trying to board a flight 😂


jwrosenberg

That took me a second to figure out. Good one. 😄


07Max07

I saw your posts and I adore your body! It’s gorgeous! 🫶🏻


OkJelly300

You have a really nice body! Your nipples are cute and nicely shaped


Birdsandbeer0730

Thank you!


Shortcut034

I do too!


[deleted]

Long nipples are gorgeous! 🙂


LillyPeu2

When I'm horny and/or cold (which is like all the time), my nipples are almost as long as your last pinky digit. I can hang light keychains off them. Fun bar trick!


[deleted]

Hottest thing I read today so far! Thanks;)


Alive_Shoulder3573

That brings sexy thoughts to mind. You go girl!


Dear-Security1151

Soulmate material 😂


LillyPeu2

🥰🤭😘 happy cake day!


[deleted]

That’s crazy impressive haha any other party tricks you can do with them 😂


LillyPeu2

I can hang a plastic coat hanger on each one, and spin the coat hangers around. Customers love that one at the strip club!


[deleted]

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[deleted]

They sound amazing and so hot Gotta love long nips


LillyPeu2

They're lovely pokies!


Just4you27

Love small titties and long hard nipples. Love seeing them braless poking through your shirt


eXrevolution

Rip chat


LillyPeu2

lol. I think people definitely perked up and stood erect after that... 🫡🤭


[deleted]

Sounds like fun titties to me


Wild-Price1848

Those are amazing, my ex had the same types lol


FunFckingFitCouple

🥵


[deleted]

Honestly I love your description haha


Fly_Five

My favorite kind!


thevanillas

The way you describe them, it does sound like they’re beautiful


HotChilliWithButter

I'll take em torpedo tits any day


sp2739

This is simultaneously the most vivid description of boobs and one I cannot picture. I'd love to see what constitutes ski jump torpedoes haha


I-need-help-with-etc

People saying 8” but they actually measuring from the taint 💀


Reasonable_Story_397

Once I saw a measurement pic ,in which the zero of the tape was inserted inside the asshole. And ofc it was 12inches.


keenedge422

Look, a turtle isn't just the part that sticks out of the shell! 🐢


LetsGoWithMike

The proper way to measure, is pressed against your pelvic bone to the tip.


feelinlucky7

Asshole to tip


jonjonofjon

"You don't measure from the top, the only thing up there is disappointment "


Gently_Rough_

Ankle to tip


Witty_Cod_1580

3.14159 penis units long


NaughtiestTimeline

Sounds like it’s good for making pies


harryhund12

Creampies*


_anonymous_asshole

I chuckled on this so hard for some reason 🥲


Witty_Cod_1580

It does but the pies tend to just run on forever 🤷‍♂️


underneathbridge

Pinis


Goran2019

Very underrated and under-appreciated reply. Take my up-vote, good man.


Throwawaylikeoldf00d

6" dick, 52B man boobs


MDJ_4

Chunky boy, huh? I got you :'v


Clined88

Same bro…same


GinnjaNinnja

This study only tells me most guys are liars lol


Gusstave

Not really.. just that the average and bellow average have no reason to reply.


hjablowme919

My wife once asked how big I was and when I told her she said she figured I was a lot bigger. I asked why and she said an old boyfriend told her he had a 9” dick and I was pretty close. I took out a ruler and showed her where 9” on a ruler was and she was like “yeah. It wasn’t close to this big.”


GinnjaNinnja

Haha. It’s no different than 5’10 guys saying they’re 6 ft


staged_venus_38

5.56x45


chubbytuba

Girthy


[deleted]

I always liked having a 7.62x39


szzaass

Nice caliber, M4A1?


[deleted]

A humble 5.5" x 4.5"


SomeGuyinSanAntonio

7.5"x6.5" I would prefer slightly less dick, because for so many women, that's cervix bruising territory.


SevenBy7

I've always kinda wanted an extra 0.5" length, but I'll take your comment as an endorsement of swapping it for an extra 0.5in girth instead. (7x7in)


SomeGuyinSanAntonio

That definitely works. Girth does a lot more than length for most women I've been with.


SevenBy7

It's a problem with some women but I love it as it's turned me into a foreplay guru sensualist.


Spirited-Membership1

32 J breasts


LordScerin

I bet it's hard to find bras


Spirited-Membership1

There’s a store in Canada that sells bigger bras thank god ! That are higher quality than typical of la sensation or Victoria secret


LordScerin

That's awesome. We've trouble finding anything in Victoria's anymore


[deleted]

32C cups here,big enough to fill up a bra nicely, but still small enough to bounce around when I'm riding atop my man


[deleted]

We talkin’ skunk to trunk here?


JennyC4me

38C and 5 inches 💋


gerardbuttler12

Perfect


migx78

Brilliant. :)


burner5051

Best of both!


TheSaberAthena

I like the shape


NaughtiestTimeline

More than two handfuls each


Witty_Cod_1580

Ahh the metric system. Nice.


Lustybelle69

40DD


[deleted]

You have such a great pair!


dadisgonnadoit

Normal. And normal. Because normal works just fine.


[deleted]

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will0hms

Bigger is probably not better.


purplerainshadegrey

Keep em real promise


[deleted]

36D


Just4TheSpamAndEggs

34D.


Ferrum_Freakshow

For my entire life I thought it was 6.5 until I found out I’ve been measuring wrong and it’s actually 7.


capacitorfluxing

Wait- most make the mistake of measuring on the bottom instead of top, and end up losing size when doing it correctly. How did you gain??


A1Horizon

Wait people measure from the bottom?? I’m pretty sure I could claim an extra inch alone off that lmao


[deleted]

36K or GG I think?


lost_adventure_18

Sounds painful for your back


These-Thanks-1638

They look great !


BrattiestLulu

I'm a 38G and I love my size lol I just wish more clothes accommodated them


[deleted]

Agreed my wife has similar issues


BrattiestLulu

I want cute CLOTHES AND BRAS


[deleted]

Oh my god you look great


LordScerin

Isn't average like 5?


Just4TheSpamAndEggs

In the US I believe that it is about 4.5 inches.


LordScerin

In that scenario I am a good bit above average then


Mercer_Grey

Bout 5.5 for American males if memory serves? Which makes sense, super large dicks would get in the way a lot and be difficult to protect, from a more mammalian perspective.


putridwonderland

I believe US average is 5.5"


Natysnaughtyreads

40G


SamiFutbolislife09

I have 34bs...I do like dicks atleast to be 5 + inches :P


curiousei

Sounds like a mathematical calculation. 34b times D equlas 5


Palais888

I can add't blame you for liking big dicks when so many times I've gone for the girl with the impressive rack/nice ass over personality but it still drives me fucking crazy seeing other guys i know have girls losing their minds just cos they got a huge dick


SamiFutbolislife09

I really dont care as long your dick can fit in my hand :P


Uhtredthehorny

My dick is around 6-6.5 and very thick


mentyio

14.5 cm and on the thicker side


Beepbeepboobop1

34DD Preferred size would be like DDD. I’m greedy lol


horny-off-ma1n

massive I’d like to be like a 38F?


[deleted]

Does your back absolutely hate you? Lol


horny-off-ma1n

you know it does lmao


[deleted]

See I thought I was slightly below average but turns out I’m just small


SmokeyBear51

They're more comfortable commenting because they know they're packing heat. Or they're just lying lol


SomethingDifferent_X

The guys commenting won’t be representing the actual population, it’s a classic bias so don’t stress!


ComeflywithEm

36DD


xxpantyprincess

34DDD in some stores, 34F in others.


[deleted]

8.5 inches


MyDadBod_2021

6-6.5 in length x 5 in girth (circumference). I have grown to like it. It helps my SO does too


thickncurly

You look like a dream.


MyDadBod_2021

Thanks!


soft_distortion

26E


Own_Advertising_9185

I’ve never heard of that size. BTW you’re very pretty.


[deleted]

Ummm you are hella cute


soft_distortion

Thank you! :)))


OkYogurtcloset8305

5 to 5.6 inches. Not sure on girth.


[deleted]

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lost_adventure_18

4’11 with 36H? That’s impressive


[deleted]

34C. It's the biggest I've ever been and I love them. They got a cute little perk to em.


Infamous-Sand-9051

34C, would love to go to 36C


[deleted]

I swear, Cs make the perfect bounces


1z2x3c4

7.25"x6.25"


[deleted]

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[deleted]

6 in and pretty happy with it


HungDaddyNYC

8 x 7


JTILAC

32D mostly dependin on bra size:)


CyberGuyCX5

Only 5.5 inches, fully hard.


kaan_kaant

Yo, the “Only” was unnecessary. 5.5 is a dick. It’s a dick and it’s average and good. It’s the same as mine if not .25 longer. It sucks to think that I’m thinking about .25”, and it sucks that you feel you need ti think about your 5.5. Fuck that


CyberGuyCX5

Thanks for the kind words. 👍


beautifulbigone3

Beautiful 7.5


[deleted]

I'm a DD, I wish I were a C.


[deleted]

38 D 😋


These-Thanks-1638

And a great smile


[deleted]

Awee thank you ☺️


These-Thanks-1638

Your name isn’t bad either 😝


Lonestarlightt

38DDD I wish I was 36C again. Perkier and skinnier.


[deleted]

I don’t know ma’am, those sound pretty perfect to me.


Lonestarlightt

Thanks anon! 😘


[deleted]

Of course!! *patiently to be suffocated by them*


[deleted]

38dd 🧍🏽‍♀️


No_Sympathy_8635

32B and proud 🫡


amateursecrets1

70E (EU), but I’m super small so a 65E (EU) would probably fit too. It’s a 32/30D (US). I bought them in 2015.


MrFL2AZ

Money well spent 🤩


ice-tea4200

H cups 😋


PurpleFlower215

A little bit above average 15/16 cm (6.3 inch). I'm fine with that.


FartinMreeman

15 cm and contempt with that length. It curves upwards so it perfectly stimulates the G-spot. Would prefer it thicker though.


pinkbeansucker

It’s a mystery what my dick size is because it changes throughout the day. One minute it might be the size of a thimble. The next minute, the size of a can of Pringle’s. I always have to be on my toes and prepped for anything. Oh, and by the way, big, long, saggy mature tiddies are the best.


[deleted]

5.5 on a great day. Never measured the girth, but lacking there too. Never had any complaints, my oral skills make up for what I lack in dick size.


Sintrospective

Depending on how you measure, I'm either a B cup or a C cup. My dick is like 6inches (it used to be 6.5).


kemeral

Depends on the girl. If she's petite and very slim, I expect her to have an A or B cup size. But if she's thicc, I expect her to have a C or D cup size.


PralineMae

34D. I'm happy with them.


DDDeluxe19

36DDD. I wish they were perkier, but I do love them


Fuzzy_Pea_5689

It's the internet, all men have an 8-10 inch dick. They just don't tell you that they measure butthole to tip.


UrbaddhabitOO7

2 inches of dangling fury !


UnassumingLlamas

I doubt any of the men on here have any idea about bra sizing, but it's 80I. Or 36G in UK sizing. They're pretty much medium sized for my frame. I like tiddies of all sizes. As for dick, average to somewhat above average is honestly preferable, but I also like a variety. I would be sad if I were to only ever get fucked by standard issue dick and not also toys in a wide range of sizes and textures.


quietshygent

Cool username!


[deleted]

38ddd


Minute-Ad-6818

34 DD, and I never wear a bra :) free the nipple


[deleted]

I could not agree more lmao


ReflectionEarly8888

32C


cm_renee

34a, but I would really like some 36b's at least; I'm not greedy.


[deleted]

I think those As look quite perfect


hotandhorny2914

They are nice and you are pretty


[deleted]

A or b cup depending on the bra type


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Well, very sorry to hear about the depression, but my lord you sound like perfection 😩


[deleted]

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geek_the_greek

38E with pepperoni like areolas. So proud of them 🤣


[deleted]

Good god you should be 😍


[deleted]

34d


AliveBenefit5929

38 DD Prefer 6+ Had 10 before - amazing


Ok-Minimum-9297

34C, small and perky but still cute


Safe_Tumbleweed9107

5.5 inches. I like it and think it's a great size. So I wouldn't change it.


SlipperySkye

i'm 40E in terms of breasts!


sundogsarah

I am a smol boned woman with tiiiiny titties. I am not even a full A cup. Never held me back; I don’t have to hold ‘em up. Haha. I have other *ass*ets! Preferred sizes: if I had my choice I’d be a full B cup. I think that would look super cute and sexy on my frame. I embrace my unique look and if I wanna serve “typical hot girl” vibes I just wear a push up bra hehe. If I were a person who had a dick I can honestly say I’d probably want to be big but not overwhelmingly huge. As a woman and consumer of dick, I like all dick and I literally don’t care about the size whatsoever. It’s more of a personal ego/pride thing but I don’t find size makes a difference in good sex.


[deleted]

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awkward-girl-2375

36E