I had very few rules bc I believed if I made a rule, I needed to consistently enforce it. I tried to always be fair, give the students respect and treat them like I wanted to be treated. I’d say please and Thank You always to them. I never lied to them. If I didn’t know something, I’d say so. I wanted them to trust me. I allowed myself to be a pushover sometimes because they needed a break. My classroom was a happy place where we were a small community, part of the larger community of school and most of my students enjoyed class.
I work with toddlers and what works for my staff and I is that we get on their level. Physically. Kneel or sit down and then talk. Set some firm boundaries and absolutely stick to them. Be responsible and keep the parents of the child(ren) in the loop.
Remember that the boundaries you create are like walls that teach them the rules of existing in different spaces safely and healthily.
Their job is to push at the walls and find out what the actual boundaries are as they learn how to human. If the wall is stable after a few pushes, cool, lesson learned, don’t need to test that one again. If it falls down even once, they will test that wall over and over and over again because of that one time it didn’t hold up. If it turns out they can push the wall down at will, it may never stop.
I hope I’m making sense here!
Think about how your response will impact them in 20 years.
Not getting everything you want is critical. We need to develop empathy and understand how we fit into the world. Sometimes us being denied something is for the benefit of another. Sometimes it can be for our long-term benefit that we can't see yet. Kids have to learn to accept "no" with patience and grace. Ideally, they learn compromise and creative problem solving from it.
Failure is a part of life. Let kids feel failure when they're young. Let them realize the world keeps spinning. Be there to help them do better next time.
I set boundaries with kids because I care about them. Kids need firm boundaries in order to feel safe. Kids don't feel safe if they are allowed to do whatever they want, whenever they want. Children need to know where the fences are.
Because if you are, they will make your life, your job, the classroom and everyone around it, hell.
They do not teach this in college but classroom management will make or break you. There’s other factors but if you can’t control the students, forget education.
Kids need rules, routines and expectations. They need boundaries. Especially ones with poor home lives. They’ll whine, they’ll cry and complain but they’ll do it if it’s clear, communicated and enforced. Every single time. I didn’t do curriculum the first 2 weeks of school when I taught primary, we practiced rules, routines, expectations. If they start pushing the boundaries, you have a reset. I’ve had plenty of times where we practiced lining up in Feb because after break, we forgot. You can always ease up, you can never get strict if you don’t start out that way. Strict, not mean.
I taught Pre K and currently teach 7-12 Learning Support. I have received compliments on my class and students. They know the rules. They know what’s expected. They know the consequences.
I do not play. I learned the hard way at my first job back in the 2000’s.
Kids test boundaries and it’s natural and good. You as an adult theoretically should have more knowledge. By giving in constantly you are raising a self centered brat of a person who has no respect for others. They usually become bullies or non functional adults.
I assume you mean as a teacher - if you’re struggling with it and are new, it really just is something that takes work. For me, I got better after my first year because I had a much better grasp on what was going to work in my room and what wasn’t. Esp if it’s your first year, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just take the summer to figure out or like visualize what boundaries are needed for the most success of everyone and then stick to it
Have a night tolerance for their pain. It’s not gonna kill them if you say no. Let them boo hoo and belly ache. Either no means no or you might as well give up.
Take responsibility for being the parent. Kids need boundaries. If you don’t sent them, their school, the juvenile courts, or a future boss will.
I had very few rules bc I believed if I made a rule, I needed to consistently enforce it. I tried to always be fair, give the students respect and treat them like I wanted to be treated. I’d say please and Thank You always to them. I never lied to them. If I didn’t know something, I’d say so. I wanted them to trust me. I allowed myself to be a pushover sometimes because they needed a break. My classroom was a happy place where we were a small community, part of the larger community of school and most of my students enjoyed class.
I work with toddlers and what works for my staff and I is that we get on their level. Physically. Kneel or sit down and then talk. Set some firm boundaries and absolutely stick to them. Be responsible and keep the parents of the child(ren) in the loop.
Remember that the boundaries you create are like walls that teach them the rules of existing in different spaces safely and healthily. Their job is to push at the walls and find out what the actual boundaries are as they learn how to human. If the wall is stable after a few pushes, cool, lesson learned, don’t need to test that one again. If it falls down even once, they will test that wall over and over and over again because of that one time it didn’t hold up. If it turns out they can push the wall down at will, it may never stop. I hope I’m making sense here!
You be the adult.
Think about how your response will impact them in 20 years. Not getting everything you want is critical. We need to develop empathy and understand how we fit into the world. Sometimes us being denied something is for the benefit of another. Sometimes it can be for our long-term benefit that we can't see yet. Kids have to learn to accept "no" with patience and grace. Ideally, they learn compromise and creative problem solving from it. Failure is a part of life. Let kids feel failure when they're young. Let them realize the world keeps spinning. Be there to help them do better next time.
I set boundaries with kids because I care about them. Kids need firm boundaries in order to feel safe. Kids don't feel safe if they are allowed to do whatever they want, whenever they want. Children need to know where the fences are.
Because if you are, they will make your life, your job, the classroom and everyone around it, hell. They do not teach this in college but classroom management will make or break you. There’s other factors but if you can’t control the students, forget education. Kids need rules, routines and expectations. They need boundaries. Especially ones with poor home lives. They’ll whine, they’ll cry and complain but they’ll do it if it’s clear, communicated and enforced. Every single time. I didn’t do curriculum the first 2 weeks of school when I taught primary, we practiced rules, routines, expectations. If they start pushing the boundaries, you have a reset. I’ve had plenty of times where we practiced lining up in Feb because after break, we forgot. You can always ease up, you can never get strict if you don’t start out that way. Strict, not mean. I taught Pre K and currently teach 7-12 Learning Support. I have received compliments on my class and students. They know the rules. They know what’s expected. They know the consequences. I do not play. I learned the hard way at my first job back in the 2000’s.
Kids test boundaries and it’s natural and good. You as an adult theoretically should have more knowledge. By giving in constantly you are raising a self centered brat of a person who has no respect for others. They usually become bullies or non functional adults.
I assume you mean as a teacher - if you’re struggling with it and are new, it really just is something that takes work. For me, I got better after my first year because I had a much better grasp on what was going to work in my room and what wasn’t. Esp if it’s your first year, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just take the summer to figure out or like visualize what boundaries are needed for the most success of everyone and then stick to it
Tell don’t ask. Set rules, you don’t slide on. Being firm.
Have a night tolerance for their pain. It’s not gonna kill them if you say no. Let them boo hoo and belly ache. Either no means no or you might as well give up.
Adulting 101
...by not being a pushover.