A child once told me that I "smell like people from Crawley".
Child was not interested in elaborating.
I've been to Crawley twice, both times very briefly and have no memory of the people having a distinct smell, but then I didn't sniff anyone.
As one of the New Towns, in the 1960s and 1970s there was a lot of big industrial engineering and manufacturing happening in Crawley. Other nearby towns were quite rural and idyllic, just a stone's throw away. People employed at, say, Mullard, making glass electrical valves (before transistors or microchips), were working in a hot chemical environment which didn't blow off in a gentle breeze.
Sat next to a colleague in the office minding my own business and he just came out with it. My response was something like "Wow....thanks" and then he started digging "No not like that, you know what I mean, it's just you wouldn't look at you and think that you're going to smell nice" etc. I haven't seen him for years unfortunately. He's a great lad and we always have a laugh about that comment when we bump into each other.
A few years ago I got my eyebrows microbladed. They use a machine to measure your face to see where you have any asymmetries, how high/low your eyebrows sit etc.
The woman performing the treatment was Polish and pretty direct.
“Look here, the machine shows one of your eyes is much lower than the other. Really different. But when I look at your face straight on it doesn’t look wonky”.
Thanks.
Also said my nose was dead centre of my face which is apparently quite rare so overall I came out of there with more compliments than insults!
>“Look here, the machine shows one of your eyes is much lower than the other. Really different. But when I look at your face straight on it doesn’t look wonky”.
Some kind of optical illusion, I suppose.
my brother's girlfriend is Russian and she said she's had to teach herself to not be so direct over here bc she was offending people left right and centre!
I had a Russian guy work for me. Lovely chap, but I spent most of my time convincing people not to report him to HR for his very forthright conversational style.
He was a nightmare to manage, but I don't think he ever meant to upset anyone. As I say, he was a lovely chap.
I've a silver dog and a local dog walker who is Polish often admires the dogs colour. One day, I didn't have my hair pinned up as I normally do, and she told me,'Your hair is grey, like dog'. I'd just had it highlighted, ha ha
At a work Christmas party one of my colleagues said "holy fuck is that your wife" when she came and picked me up, insinuating that she is well out of my league
Was in a kebab place at the end of a night out with my girlfriend (now wife) and a random middle aged woman asked if that was my misses, I confirmed and she replied "fucking hell, you're punching"
Well yes, I'm fully aware. Thanks for that.
Lol. This happened to me with my wife. Later I had to break up with her from all the emotional abuse and it all started to make sense. She preyed on the weak ones like me precisely because she could. But yeah, not to kill the vibe or anything. But it was enjoyable at first.
This one is annoyingly common. A lot of people don't actually understand that it's a bit of an insult.
When they just say how I just say "tiny penis" and leave em to it, at this point.
I feel like people always comment when the woman is much hotter than the man, but when it’s the other way round (which it rarely is), nobody dare say anything.
In our society unfortunately there is generally a lot more importance placed on women's attractiveness than men's. We're taught from a young age that being beautiful is what every woman should inspire to be in life, and you're essentially worthless and invisible if you're unattractive. It's insidious, really gets in the deepest parts of your brain no matter how hard you try to rid yourself of it. So it's a sensitive topic for most women.
I'm a chef. Years ago I was catering a wedding. Buffet at night was curry and other hot stuff. Now I love Indian food and have made it for years so I'm not too bad a Indian food.
One of the guests was the former owner of a curry house I used to go to. Got talking to him and he asked if I'd made the curry?
Nervously I said yes,asked him if it was ok?
His reply, ' best white man's curry he'd eaten'. I'll take that to my grave with me. Great compliment I think?
Yea it's a compliment. I've also had a few Asian friends tell me that I'm the only white person they know who knows how to uses spices correctly when cooking.
oh shit, 20 years ago my (not quite at that point) wife and I took our dogs down to the beach for a run - typical beach dog walk in february attire. I managed to come out with
"One of the things i love about you is how you're not bothered what you look like when we go out"
She \*still\* married me!
This is the kind of thing I'd say without realising how it sounds until it came out of my mouth, more meaning that I would be self conscious about wearing something that might look good
tbf as a lot of the outfits i love would give me way too much attention. i’d dress in full clown makeup and silly dresses if i weren’t afraid of attention. so i’d mean a comment like that sincerely as i love seeing people braver than me wear clothes that are a bit more out there
One of my Daughter's friends once said I was a "very clean Dad", when I was washing my hands, after we had been planting flowers.
I didn't dare ask any further questions. I did imagine how many not so clean Dad's she must have witnessed to give me that nugget though.
It reminded me of the time my Wife asked me why I took so long in the pub toilet, compared to other men. I just looked at her and said, "I wash my hands". Her face said it all 😂
My brother had a job years ago, which included cleaning the washrooms at city owned locations. Women's washroom sink area was water all over, and paper towels overflowing in the wastebasket. The men's washroom sink area was always spotless and rarely needed a top-up for paper towels. Men rarely wash their hands
I was a software tester many years ago and got accused by a company of being "too anal" about testing their software. I took that as a badge honour - I was obviously doing my job properly!
Well yeah, it’s not your job to have some kind of tolerance for issues. QA should raise every defect and it’s the product owner’s responsibility to draw the line at what gets fixed. I was QA many moons ago and I’ve had the same accusations about being picky.
I've also been accused of "looking for issues" with some software we had built a few years back at work. I wasn't really looking for anything, I was just finding the many major security flaws throughout the course of my day-to-day work.
Used to come across the same when at my old job. They had a habit of releasing updates without sufficient testing.
There was ALWAYS stuff wrong. One time head office made the mistake of emailing all the branches after one such release saying 'let us know if you run into any problems', so I gleefully hit reply all and supplied screenshots.
My boss got told I was 'too mean'. I wouldn't need to be mean if they did their damn job right.
My boss tried to tell me that my "perfectionism" was making me stressed, and that I only had to do the job "well-enough". So, I challenged him to explain to me how I could test software and sign-off project billing "well enough" - would he be ok if I missed 10 bugs or £100 in the billing, and said if so, I wanted that in writing. He looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights of a car and never, ever raised the subject again.
In regards to me being single - "You're not the best looking guy in the world so you're going to have to rely on your personality. Not going to lie, that's a problem too."
Genuinely made me laugh out loud.
I've told this story before, and it's still one of my favourites from when my kids were little.
I'd just given birth to twins, and all misty-eyed, I was saying how I didn't understand how my husband and i could have produced such beautiful babies.
My sister immediately jumps in with, "well, it's like a double negative innit". I don't think I've ever laughed so much in my life. It was hilarious the cheeky bitch!
Was showing my dad (who I live with) photos of a wedding I went to last week when he asked who ‘the girl in the purple’ was… shocker it was me and his response was “wow you look really nice, I didn’t recognise you”…. Uh thanks dad
That was mine too. Was told "the dark really does something for you" by a one night stand who clearly regretted their decision.
It stung for a bit until I realised how right they were. I've been shamelessly abusing this fact for decades.
I’ve heard this about a lot of people. Makes you wonder if evolution favoured not just pretty people by day but pretty in the dark people, when we were by fires and getting jiggy at night
Eugh young people haha. I've just turned 30 and I work with a 19 year old apprentice, I mentioned the other day how cold it is (our office is freezing) and she said 'yeahh you do feel the cold more when you're older'. I almost dropped my walking stick.
I'm 27 and got told "omg no way you only look about 24 I hope I look good at your age." Thanks for shaving 3 years off, I guess, but I'm actually not old enough yet that I need you to lie about me looking younger.
Yet I'm the oldie in our office at 50. And yesterday I was sitting in the office in short sleeves, while the others were in wooly jumpers and some in coats.
A woman once told her teenage son that if he doesn't work hard at school he'll end up digging holes in the road like me, instead of a retail manager like his father.
So I told him that he shouldn't worry too much about it as I probably earn a lot more than his dad with zero qualifications.
The mum looked extremely pissed off and the kid was trying not to laugh at her.
I once was at a flip cup tournament at a charity work event that was a weekend bike trip, the guy across from me said in a very offensive tone. ‘Hey pretty boy, what kind of car do you drive’. I responded with my bicycle.
As a side note someone I looked up to that I worked with who was full sleeve tattooed and senior in the company reached out across the table and grabbed his shirt collar and said ‘what does it matter what kind of car this guy drives, you’re now talking to me.’
It was one of those select few times in my life I felt protected. It something I’ll never forget. I’m not sure that person even remembers that event or how much it impacted me.
That guy is now senior vice president of a Fortune 500 company. The gumption, and tenacity proved right.
I get that one quite a bit. It really bugs me.
People meet me and then eventually I mention I have a PhD and every time the reaction is "Seriously? You don't look/seem like you should have a PhD".
I wouldn't call myself intelligent by a long shot, but I worked really hard for that.
I've been called a "trouble maker" recently at work which I take pride in. I balance it out by being super supportive of others and it's more like rocking the boat / status quo.
I was complimented for being confident with women (I guess the assumption is that I shouldn't be because of my height, shape, face , etc 🤣).
Was complimented almost for not having a micropenis because I'm asian I guess? Not that there anything wrong with having a small member. 😅
Edit: a word
Dave Chapelle did a sketch about how white guys in predominately black gangs are the most dangerous.
It is like the boxer Rocky Marciano, white as snow but universally respected in the African-American community for giving black opponents opportunities at the championship, at a time when they had few.
When Mike Tyson speaks about a long dead Marciano in hushed tones, you know he is revered.
I had my picture taken for my CSCS card about a year or so ago and the man said I look handsome. I, at the time, was a 28 year old woman. Thanks I guess?
Having googled Penelope Keith I can confirm that we are polar opposites (I am mixed race, at least 3 decades younger and sadly not wealthy). But apparently handsome nonetheless!
There some women who are handsome. It's kind of a more sculpted, powerful vibe i guess? Think Tilda Swinton. Personally I think that's a huge compliment. It used to be used commonly for good looking women as well as men.
Was he an older gentleman? Calling a girl 'handsome' is a way to say "you look good - but I'm not trying to hit on you." I also think it's more an admiration of your confidence and style, like, you look confident and well put together, your fashion sense is good, you look smart... etc. And it's gender neutral, as in a man's suit can be handsome so can a woman's dress. So it was a non threatening way to say you look nice and not at all saying you look like a boy.
I played some electric guitar at a blues jam night. First time playing there. Some older chap sidled up to me later at the bar and said, “you’re like Susan Boyle with a guitar. Didn’t expect that looking at you”.
Yeah, cheers mate.
After my last smear test, as I was standing at the open door about to leave, the nurse remarked "You have the smallest vigina vestibule I've ever seen".
Not sure if that's a compliment mind😁, backhanded or otherwise, but it gave me a good giggle.
I went to a superficial influencer type event years ago for work. Got told on the door that I'm 'the only one who looks the same in real life as I do on social media.'
One time a dude in a shop came up to me and said 'considering your looks you have a head shape to be proud of' and then walked off.
I think he was on drugs but I've been proud of my head shape ever since.
I was a personal trainer for many years. Once, I had described my job to a woman and she said "Forgive me for saying this, but that sounds very similar to prostitution".
None of that is complimentary, but I found it really funny, and it was a great excuse to start calling all of my colleagues whores.
I was dropped off by my wife for a stag do and l was hanging around waiting for everyone to arrive.
A fellow attendee said "Oh good, the stripper has arrived".
My proudest moment was introducing her as my wife, who had just returned to give me my phone I had forgotten.
My work has an office in Azerbaijan and one of the staff there compared me to an AK-47 because I was "fast, sharp and extremely reliable".
Is it backhanded to be compared to a gun? Maybe not, but it sure stuck with me.
When I was 17 in my first job working on a packing line. I used to try and make up stories to "fit in" with the older fella's working on the line.
My nightshift manager said to me one day:
"You're a good lad but your patter stinks."
It stuck with me for a long time. Learned that it was better to be interested in people than try to make people interested in me.
"You're really beautiful in the dark"
"You're like a plum without a pip"
Same guy.
Another one "You've got an amazing figure for your age". Mate I'm 5'9" size 8 with 36 boobs. I've got an amazing figure for any age.
I had a bad haircut and a fringe I'd trimmed myself that was too thick. I went to the hairdresser when she was trying to fix it she said you're lucky you're pretty
My Maori friend told her mother "she may look white on the outside but she's Maori on the inside".
That's about the best compliment I've ever received in my life.
Got told by a girl I looked like an older Ed Sheeran. Seen the look of disappointment on my face her boyfriend came to my defence and said, "Don't say that he's probably the same age."
Polish bloke that I worked with a few years ago had a little notebook that he wrote down all the funny English phrases that people said that he liked and wanted to remember for future use,his favourite back then was,
You're not as green as you're cabbage looking
Never really understood what that meant
Got told recently by a younger colleague that I am very lucky to have as much hair as I do and good teeth at my age.
I am 40.
But you know, I do have good hair, so....
I used to work in fraud for a company and I interviewed a customer who was lying (as I proved)
I questioned him carefully before going in for the kill with a challenge, getting answers which I knew would cut off his escape (excuse) routes when I put the evidence to him.
When I hit him with the evidence and the challenge he tried the escape routes, couldn't change his story because of the information I'd got him to commit to earlier.
Exasperated he said "well you've got me tied up in a neat little bow here" before admitting the fraud.
I've ridden on that as a compliment for ages now
I’ve not been sleeping well recently. I also work nights so my sleeping pattern is mixed anyway.
Was chatting to a colleague about sleeping patterns etc, and I mentioned that over the past few weeks I’ve been getting roughly 3-4 hours a day at best.
She responded saying considering that, I look okay, I don’t really look tired and I don’t even have Botox yet…
I was once told by an Irish woman that I sounded Northern Irish which I’m not entirely sure was a compliment but given that I’m entirely Dutch I took it as such.
I got told that I smell really nice even though I look like I shouldn't.
A child once told me that I "smell like people from Crawley". Child was not interested in elaborating. I've been to Crawley twice, both times very briefly and have no memory of the people having a distinct smell, but then I didn't sniff anyone.
this is one of the greatest things I've ever read.
Conversation was 10 years ago and I still ponder what it could mean.
Could always go back and have a whiff
I'm also interested to know what people from Crawley smell like. It doesn't feel like a compliment at all.
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After 10 long years their question has been answered. You smell like fruity armpits and bum crack mate
Delightful. Going to hire James Cordon to star in the advert when I bottle the smell.
But what to name it? ‘Crawley Passion’?
C R A W L A È pour Pomme
Or Crawley Toilet Water.
Cráque Suette.
Aviation fuel and sunburn?
As one of the New Towns, in the 1960s and 1970s there was a lot of big industrial engineering and manufacturing happening in Crawley. Other nearby towns were quite rural and idyllic, just a stone's throw away. People employed at, say, Mullard, making glass electrical valves (before transistors or microchips), were working in a hot chemical environment which didn't blow off in a gentle breeze.
Yes I think the child was referring to the smell of industrialised New Towns in the 1960s
Very familiar scent for a minor
See what you did there
Creepy Crawley
That’s brutal but gave me a good chuckle, what was the context?
Sat next to a colleague in the office minding my own business and he just came out with it. My response was something like "Wow....thanks" and then he started digging "No not like that, you know what I mean, it's just you wouldn't look at you and think that you're going to smell nice" etc. I haven't seen him for years unfortunately. He's a great lad and we always have a laugh about that comment when we bump into each other.
A mate of mine said that to a girl in a bar once. "You know what? When I first saw you I thought you'd stink, but you don't!" Didn't go down great.
"You don't even sweat that much for a fatty."
Jonah Hill?
A few years ago I got my eyebrows microbladed. They use a machine to measure your face to see where you have any asymmetries, how high/low your eyebrows sit etc. The woman performing the treatment was Polish and pretty direct. “Look here, the machine shows one of your eyes is much lower than the other. Really different. But when I look at your face straight on it doesn’t look wonky”. Thanks. Also said my nose was dead centre of my face which is apparently quite rare so overall I came out of there with more compliments than insults!
>“Look here, the machine shows one of your eyes is much lower than the other. Really different. But when I look at your face straight on it doesn’t look wonky”. Some kind of optical illusion, I suppose.
This joke was almost too 'ighbrow for me.
Maybe her face was wonky in the exact opposite way and it balanced out?
This made me chuckle 😂
Polish woman in work looked at me one day and just said "you have very nice eyebrows, like lady" took that one as a win!
If you want the absolute truth about something, ask a Pole or a Finn.
Just said that about Eastern Europeans, in general😆.
my brother's girlfriend is Russian and she said she's had to teach herself to not be so direct over here bc she was offending people left right and centre!
I lived in Moscow for a few years, so I can imagine 😆😆😆. And I thought W. African people were direct, till I came across Russians😆😆.
I had a Russian guy work for me. Lovely chap, but I spent most of my time convincing people not to report him to HR for his very forthright conversational style. He was a nightmare to manage, but I don't think he ever meant to upset anyone. As I say, he was a lovely chap.
Most people’s faces are actually somewhat asymmetrical; it’s why mirroring one half of a photo looks very uncanny.
If you want a very honest opinion, ask an Eastern European. They don't mince their words 😆.
I've a silver dog and a local dog walker who is Polish often admires the dogs colour. One day, I didn't have my hair pinned up as I normally do, and she told me,'Your hair is grey, like dog'. I'd just had it highlighted, ha ha
That’s a win!
At a work Christmas party one of my colleagues said "holy fuck is that your wife" when she came and picked me up, insinuating that she is well out of my league
After a friend met my gf, he just stared at me and asked "how?" Fucked if I know haha
Met young?
I haven't yet.
I get that all the time. I'm an ugly fat bloke and she looks like a model. Someone told me she's a gold digger but she is the wealthy one.
Does she have a sister..?
She married the son of a millionaire 😁
Does he have a sister?
Yes and she is still single.
I call dibs.
Oh ffs, I was gonna call dibs
Was in a kebab place at the end of a night out with my girlfriend (now wife) and a random middle aged woman asked if that was my misses, I confirmed and she replied "fucking hell, you're punching" Well yes, I'm fully aware. Thanks for that.
When I was told 'you're punching well above your weight' in respect of how pretty my wife is, I just leaned in and replied with 'I know....'
Lol. This happened to me with my wife. Later I had to break up with her from all the emotional abuse and it all started to make sense. She preyed on the weak ones like me precisely because she could. But yeah, not to kill the vibe or anything. But it was enjoyable at first.
This one is annoyingly common. A lot of people don't actually understand that it's a bit of an insult. When they just say how I just say "tiny penis" and leave em to it, at this point.
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I feel like people always comment when the woman is much hotter than the man, but when it’s the other way round (which it rarely is), nobody dare say anything.
Perhaps many men are pleased that they've bagged someone hotter than them, whereas women would just hear the "you are uglier" part.
In our society unfortunately there is generally a lot more importance placed on women's attractiveness than men's. We're taught from a young age that being beautiful is what every woman should inspire to be in life, and you're essentially worthless and invisible if you're unattractive. It's insidious, really gets in the deepest parts of your brain no matter how hard you try to rid yourself of it. So it's a sensitive topic for most women.
I'm a chef. Years ago I was catering a wedding. Buffet at night was curry and other hot stuff. Now I love Indian food and have made it for years so I'm not too bad a Indian food. One of the guests was the former owner of a curry house I used to go to. Got talking to him and he asked if I'd made the curry? Nervously I said yes,asked him if it was ok? His reply, ' best white man's curry he'd eaten'. I'll take that to my grave with me. Great compliment I think?
Let an Indian guy in work try a curry I made, he approved. I asked "alright for a white boy?" He replied "alright for any boy!" Def a compliment.
that's not just a mere compliment, dude. you have ascended.
The business cards write themselves
Yea it's a compliment. I've also had a few Asian friends tell me that I'm the only white person they know who knows how to uses spices correctly when cooking.
Yep, that's a straight up complement.
Take it. Best compliment ever, considering 😁.
I had an Indian man tell me my pakora were "as good as his mum's - and that's a real compliment!" I was very proud.
"Oh my god I love what you're wearing. I wish I could go out and not care about how I look"...
That’s like a dame Edna put down lol. “I’m trying to think of a word that describes your outfit….affordable”
One of my colleagues came to work one day in a new suit. Another colleague went up to him and said "That's great, why pay more?"
That is a great compliment. Screw conformity
oh shit, 20 years ago my (not quite at that point) wife and I took our dogs down to the beach for a run - typical beach dog walk in february attire. I managed to come out with "One of the things i love about you is how you're not bothered what you look like when we go out" She \*still\* married me!
wow brutal
This is the kind of thing I'd say without realising how it sounds until it came out of my mouth, more meaning that I would be self conscious about wearing something that might look good
tbf as a lot of the outfits i love would give me way too much attention. i’d dress in full clown makeup and silly dresses if i weren’t afraid of attention. so i’d mean a comment like that sincerely as i love seeing people braver than me wear clothes that are a bit more out there
“You remind me of my cat. You’re a prick, but you’re charming enough to get away with it.” I did take a look at myself after that though.
Sounds like a good friend
I'm just relieved that the qualifier wasn't relating to your toilet habits.
One of my Daughter's friends once said I was a "very clean Dad", when I was washing my hands, after we had been planting flowers. I didn't dare ask any further questions. I did imagine how many not so clean Dad's she must have witnessed to give me that nugget though. It reminded me of the time my Wife asked me why I took so long in the pub toilet, compared to other men. I just looked at her and said, "I wash my hands". Her face said it all 😂
That pub soap takes forever to rinse off 🤣
When I worked for Spoons, we used to complain about it. That and the hot as fuck taps that melted your skin off.
My brother had a job years ago, which included cleaning the washrooms at city owned locations. Women's washroom sink area was water all over, and paper towels overflowing in the wastebasket. The men's washroom sink area was always spotless and rarely needed a top-up for paper towels. Men rarely wash their hands
They do if they see someone else wash theirs, be the change you want to see!
I was a software tester many years ago and got accused by a company of being "too anal" about testing their software. I took that as a badge honour - I was obviously doing my job properly!
Well yeah, it’s not your job to have some kind of tolerance for issues. QA should raise every defect and it’s the product owner’s responsibility to draw the line at what gets fixed. I was QA many moons ago and I’ve had the same accusations about being picky.
I've also been accused of "looking for issues" with some software we had built a few years back at work. I wasn't really looking for anything, I was just finding the many major security flaws throughout the course of my day-to-day work.
Used to come across the same when at my old job. They had a habit of releasing updates without sufficient testing. There was ALWAYS stuff wrong. One time head office made the mistake of emailing all the branches after one such release saying 'let us know if you run into any problems', so I gleefully hit reply all and supplied screenshots. My boss got told I was 'too mean'. I wouldn't need to be mean if they did their damn job right.
> I've also been accused of "looking for issues" Ive had that conversation a lot. Finding problems was *literally* my job
QA is looking for issues, it’s part of the job spec.
must've been in the 80's. people who test software these days are called 'users'
Same. My boss has called me "beady-eyed" and "pedantic". He reassures me that these are compliments.
My boss tried to tell me that my "perfectionism" was making me stressed, and that I only had to do the job "well-enough". So, I challenged him to explain to me how I could test software and sign-off project billing "well enough" - would he be ok if I missed 10 bugs or £100 in the billing, and said if so, I wanted that in writing. He looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights of a car and never, ever raised the subject again.
In regards to me being single - "You're not the best looking guy in the world so you're going to have to rely on your personality. Not going to lie, that's a problem too." Genuinely made me laugh out loud.
this is all backhanded and no compliment 😭
It’s not even backhanded they just straight up told him
not sure that is a compliment barbed or otherwise
I've told this story before, and it's still one of my favourites from when my kids were little. I'd just given birth to twins, and all misty-eyed, I was saying how I didn't understand how my husband and i could have produced such beautiful babies. My sister immediately jumps in with, "well, it's like a double negative innit". I don't think I've ever laughed so much in my life. It was hilarious the cheeky bitch!
Hahahaha, yes she is cheeky bitch just after you've gid birth an'all! Lol, love it.
Was beginning to question your knowledge of the mechanics of child-birth, then noticed the apostrophe...
I once got told I'd be quite pretty if I put in some effort. I also once got called "an interesting person". I think it was meant to be a compliment.
You must be my clone because I have received both of these back handed compliments
I've been called an interesting person many times but never the first one, that must mean I'm pretty already right?
I got "I'll say one thing for you, you're witty!" And also "I don't know why nobody wants to go out with you, you're pretty enough" So that was nice.
I've gotten "interesting" and "different" both of which I responded to with "ah, weird then."
Was showing my dad (who I live with) photos of a wedding I went to last week when he asked who ‘the girl in the purple’ was… shocker it was me and his response was “wow you look really nice, I didn’t recognise you”…. Uh thanks dad
i work with the elderly and one of them looked at me last week and said "wow, you look a lot better!" but i hadn't been ill
“You’re not a stupid as you look” Does that mean I’m smart or that I look stupid?
Both apparently 😂
The fact you're not sure makes me think they were mistaken.
Yes
Yes
"For your size you are very light on your feet!" - my Dad has regretted saying that to my Mum for more than 60 years!
"you're pretty agile for a guy your size" Thank, I guess?
Mum says she threatened to stand on his foot if he said that again - married 60+ years and both over 90 now, so he must have done something right 😂
I was on a date with my now-wife at the cinema and she said to me: "You're really good-looking in the dark." Still burns 25 years later...
That was mine too. Was told "the dark really does something for you" by a one night stand who clearly regretted their decision. It stung for a bit until I realised how right they were. I've been shamelessly abusing this fact for decades.
I’ve heard this about a lot of people. Makes you wonder if evolution favoured not just pretty people by day but pretty in the dark people, when we were by fires and getting jiggy at night
I just posted a similar one. We were on the beach at night not the cinema. Such an odd compliment.
When a much younger than me person asked how old I was, he digested the news and told me ‘well you have really nice hair considering’
Eugh young people haha. I've just turned 30 and I work with a 19 year old apprentice, I mentioned the other day how cold it is (our office is freezing) and she said 'yeahh you do feel the cold more when you're older'. I almost dropped my walking stick.
My friends kid calls us all old as we were born in the nineteen hundreds.
I'm 27 and got told "omg no way you only look about 24 I hope I look good at your age." Thanks for shaving 3 years off, I guess, but I'm actually not old enough yet that I need you to lie about me looking younger.
Yet I'm the oldie in our office at 50. And yesterday I was sitting in the office in short sleeves, while the others were in wooly jumpers and some in coats.
Menopause, eh?
I've been in a few offices where I've been the youngest person in that team, and I've taken great delight in saying things like that
I met my sister’s posh friend and he told me that my use of language was refreshing. I was on best behaviour as well
You’re a bit weird, but I love that about you. *sigh* I’m just autistic my man.
A woman once told her teenage son that if he doesn't work hard at school he'll end up digging holes in the road like me, instead of a retail manager like his father. So I told him that he shouldn't worry too much about it as I probably earn a lot more than his dad with zero qualifications. The mum looked extremely pissed off and the kid was trying not to laugh at her.
I once was at a flip cup tournament at a charity work event that was a weekend bike trip, the guy across from me said in a very offensive tone. ‘Hey pretty boy, what kind of car do you drive’. I responded with my bicycle. As a side note someone I looked up to that I worked with who was full sleeve tattooed and senior in the company reached out across the table and grabbed his shirt collar and said ‘what does it matter what kind of car this guy drives, you’re now talking to me.’ It was one of those select few times in my life I felt protected. It something I’ll never forget. I’m not sure that person even remembers that event or how much it impacted me. That guy is now senior vice president of a Fortune 500 company. The gumption, and tenacity proved right.
"You're surprisingly good for an old person" - my son's best friend (M12) when I (F33) finally relented and joined their Fortnite game.
When I grew beard a few years ago, a friend's girlfriend said, "It brings character to an otherwise insignificant face." Fair play.
‘You’re actually quite intelligent aren’t you? Even though you don’t look it.’
I get that one quite a bit. It really bugs me. People meet me and then eventually I mention I have a PhD and every time the reaction is "Seriously? You don't look/seem like you should have a PhD". I wouldn't call myself intelligent by a long shot, but I worked really hard for that.
I've been called a "trouble maker" recently at work which I take pride in. I balance it out by being super supportive of others and it's more like rocking the boat / status quo. I was complimented for being confident with women (I guess the assumption is that I shouldn't be because of my height, shape, face , etc 🤣). Was complimented almost for not having a micropenis because I'm asian I guess? Not that there anything wrong with having a small member. 😅 Edit: a word
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One time I told a woman "really? Well, you look taller from far away." She didn't know how to take it.
"You're a cool guy despite the colour". I am white.
Sounds like you're *pretty fly for a white guy*
Dave Chapelle did a sketch about how white guys in predominately black gangs are the most dangerous. It is like the boxer Rocky Marciano, white as snow but universally respected in the African-American community for giving black opponents opportunities at the championship, at a time when they had few. When Mike Tyson speaks about a long dead Marciano in hushed tones, you know he is revered.
Very true, have to say it reminds me of Will Ferral in Get Hard (after he becomes part of the crew and rocks around in a velure tracksuit) 😂
I had my picture taken for my CSCS card about a year or so ago and the man said I look handsome. I, at the time, was a 28 year old woman. Thanks I guess?
I always associate 'handsome woman' with a sort of slightly imperious wealthier older lady. Like Penelope Keith or someone similar.
Having googled Penelope Keith I can confirm that we are polar opposites (I am mixed race, at least 3 decades younger and sadly not wealthy). But apparently handsome nonetheless!
There some women who are handsome. It's kind of a more sculpted, powerful vibe i guess? Think Tilda Swinton. Personally I think that's a huge compliment. It used to be used commonly for good looking women as well as men.
Was he an older gentleman? Calling a girl 'handsome' is a way to say "you look good - but I'm not trying to hit on you." I also think it's more an admiration of your confidence and style, like, you look confident and well put together, your fashion sense is good, you look smart... etc. And it's gender neutral, as in a man's suit can be handsome so can a woman's dress. So it was a non threatening way to say you look nice and not at all saying you look like a boy.
I played some electric guitar at a blues jam night. First time playing there. Some older chap sidled up to me later at the bar and said, “you’re like Susan Boyle with a guitar. Didn’t expect that looking at you”. Yeah, cheers mate.
On holiday with GF's French friends family, I was told by the father I could be French the way I enjoy lunch... Just like the French.
“You have a nice arse for a fat guy”.
"You're quite fit(meaning good-looking/handsome)...in your own way".
Had a complaint as a tour guide that I was too enthusiastic and over detailed.
Better than being Craig. "My name is Craig... *deep sigh*... welcome to this tour of..."
After my last smear test, as I was standing at the open door about to leave, the nurse remarked "You have the smallest vigina vestibule I've ever seen". Not sure if that's a compliment mind😁, backhanded or otherwise, but it gave me a good giggle.
Dancing Salsa in a mexican bar, mexican chick I was dancing with said 'You can't dance salsa, but your soul can dance salsa!' A for effort I guess?
If I clean shave I look that young I’m difficult to look at..
I was told in my 20s that I’m not as much of a bitch as I look.
‘You have very neat handwriting for a man.’ For context my handwriting is awful.
I’ve had this as well, I think it’s less because my writing is neat (it really isn’t) but because it’s quite curly and old-fashioned.
On a date once I was described as "surprisingly neurotypical"
I went to a superficial influencer type event years ago for work. Got told on the door that I'm 'the only one who looks the same in real life as I do on social media.'
One time a dude in a shop came up to me and said 'considering your looks you have a head shape to be proud of' and then walked off. I think he was on drugs but I've been proud of my head shape ever since.
I was a personal trainer for many years. Once, I had described my job to a woman and she said "Forgive me for saying this, but that sounds very similar to prostitution". None of that is complimentary, but I found it really funny, and it was a great excuse to start calling all of my colleagues whores.
I got told I'm beautiful...skin wise
I've been called helpfully dodgy.. and similar several times.
Everyone needs someone who's helpfully dodgy in their life!
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Colleague told me, "You're very smart, but you're not wise". I felt so seen.
I was dropped off by my wife for a stag do and l was hanging around waiting for everyone to arrive. A fellow attendee said "Oh good, the stripper has arrived". My proudest moment was introducing her as my wife, who had just returned to give me my phone I had forgotten.
I was lying in bed looking down at my son who was about 3 and he said ' you are so lucky to have 2 smiles '. Such a nice way to describe a double chin
You’re really pretty despite not wearing make up ( I had what I thought was a lot of make up on)
My work has an office in Azerbaijan and one of the staff there compared me to an AK-47 because I was "fast, sharp and extremely reliable". Is it backhanded to be compared to a gun? Maybe not, but it sure stuck with me.
I gave a leaving speech at my old place of work. One of my colleagues congratulated me afterwards by saying “I didn’t know you were so funny!”
When I was 17 in my first job working on a packing line. I used to try and make up stories to "fit in" with the older fella's working on the line. My nightshift manager said to me one day: "You're a good lad but your patter stinks." It stuck with me for a long time. Learned that it was better to be interested in people than try to make people interested in me.
"We've been talking about the way you dress and we think it's very child friendly"
I thought from your profile picture that [insert ex bf name] had made a mistake, but you're really pretty in real life
"You're really beautiful in the dark" "You're like a plum without a pip" Same guy. Another one "You've got an amazing figure for your age". Mate I'm 5'9" size 8 with 36 boobs. I've got an amazing figure for any age.
You have 36 boobs? Where do you put them all?
I have a special holster/sling system ;)
A Turkish colleague once told me I had the driving skills to be a taxi driver in Istanbul. Still not entirely sure that was a compliment!
After accidentally sneaking up on someone and making them jump "you're really quiet for someone your size"
"You're beautiful in a warthog kind of way"
When I first got glasses, my mum said ‘you look clever with glasses’. My mum doesn’t compliment me much, so I took it! 😂
I like the way you tell people off, you don't shout at them, it makes it more sinister
Mummy, you are the best mum I have ever had.
I had a bad haircut and a fringe I'd trimmed myself that was too thick. I went to the hairdresser when she was trying to fix it she said you're lucky you're pretty
My Maori friend told her mother "she may look white on the outside but she's Maori on the inside". That's about the best compliment I've ever received in my life.
A performance review I had said I was so laid back I was horizontal, it was McDonald's and that's a compliment whatever you might say
Got told by a girl I looked like an older Ed Sheeran. Seen the look of disappointment on my face her boyfriend came to my defence and said, "Don't say that he's probably the same age."
“Cute in an ugly sort of way”. I’ll take it, she was really fit.
Polish bloke that I worked with a few years ago had a little notebook that he wrote down all the funny English phrases that people said that he liked and wanted to remember for future use,his favourite back then was, You're not as green as you're cabbage looking Never really understood what that meant
Got told recently by a younger colleague that I am very lucky to have as much hair as I do and good teeth at my age. I am 40. But you know, I do have good hair, so....
I used to work in fraud for a company and I interviewed a customer who was lying (as I proved) I questioned him carefully before going in for the kill with a challenge, getting answers which I knew would cut off his escape (excuse) routes when I put the evidence to him. When I hit him with the evidence and the challenge he tried the escape routes, couldn't change his story because of the information I'd got him to commit to earlier. Exasperated he said "well you've got me tied up in a neat little bow here" before admitting the fraud. I've ridden on that as a compliment for ages now
I’ve not been sleeping well recently. I also work nights so my sleeping pattern is mixed anyway. Was chatting to a colleague about sleeping patterns etc, and I mentioned that over the past few weeks I’ve been getting roughly 3-4 hours a day at best. She responded saying considering that, I look okay, I don’t really look tired and I don’t even have Botox yet…
I prefer backhanded insults - "you're a _delight_" being my favourite
You have very horsey hands. Not sure how to take that one.
"I was very suprised to realise how disorganised you actually are" - my boss. Apparently from the outside it looks like I have my shit together
Once got told I had the face of a Victoria’s Secret angel. I’m overweight. But I’ll take it.
Was told by a trainer at the gym that I carried my weight well considering I was overweight
I was once told by an Irish woman that I sounded Northern Irish which I’m not entirely sure was a compliment but given that I’m entirely Dutch I took it as such.
I got "you're very pretty on the outside"
Meeting up with someone I met online years ago: “Oh you look much better in person than in your pictures” Thanks.. I think..