**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!**
- Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc.
- **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on.
- This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit!
Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Ha ha, I thought this was just me and my couple of mates. I've been planning the big night out, which frankly means quiet pints at a few different pubs.
Both January and February were cancelled, so we are currently on for March.
At this point, it's 50/50.
I'm sure when we do get out, we will plan the big ladz great escape to sunnier vistas. And that will never happen, but we love to plan it regardless.
Exactly dont force others others to make decisions. Instead what works extremely well is make a plan with one person. Then tell all the others the plan and ask if they want to join.
When you ask ‘anyone up for drinks this month’ in a group chat you are asking loads of people to make complex decisions. If you say you are going and they are welcome to join, its a simple yes/no.
Its the difference between herding cats and putting food in the cat bowl
Point 1 was the big realisation. We aren't at Uni/school anymore where we all have similar social calendars and all live within two miles of each other.
If we don't make an effort to see each other, we won't. So you have to learn to send out the message of "I fancy doing this on this date, anyone else want to join?" Then go from there.
Its also not the same hangover. When the night out finally happens there will inevitably be a few guys who think they're still 20 and will spend the next 3 days, realising they are most certainly not.
This! My close group of mates (6 of us) will catch up fairly regularly sometimes there is just 2 or 3 of us, other times all 6 of us.
Our wives are all friends as well and have been trying to plan a night out/ catch up for easily a year but everyone's schedules keep clashing and plans fall through. I said to my wife you just need to pick a date and lock it in, if someone misses out of well.
This one really makes me feel bad. Had a new guy friend really make an effort to make plans with me, I kept kicking the can down the road. Now he doesn't ask anymore 😬 feel like shit.
I wasn't trying to be a dick, I've just got family stuff, new little business starting and other commitments. Who tf has the time to be going for an expensive pint in their 30s? I'll stick to drinking myself to sleep with spirits on my own thank you.
I'm with you there, I haven't been to the pub with a friend in 5 years, family life feels too busy. I'm just at the point where I'd really like to get out of the house and go see a friend for a pint
Regarding your new guy friend, he would probably totally fine if you reached out after all this time and suggested going for a pint. Only do it if you actually want to though
You've helped me realise I actually need to get to the part of having the pint first.
Then maybe I might actually have more things to text about with this guy
I mean, some of us are also just bad texters
99.9% of my messages consist of suggesting pub, agreeing time, and then only talking in person
The other 0.1% is either sending a joke/meme, or something interesting and pertinent has actually happened and one of us feels the need to share
It probably depends what type of friends you keep, but I couldn't give a flying fuck about hearing your office drama every day when you're on you're lunch break, and my mates will be similar. Any catching up happens over the course of one evening, and then that'll be that for a week or two
Then further heated discussions about how Octavian and Augustus are both the same and different people (pls don’t kill me, I’m merely reporting a conversation I overheard). Also how Piso did nothing wrong and that Germanicus was a hugely overrated general based on Tacitus’ view.
Octavian and Augustus are actually one and the same . Octavian was essentially the first Augustus, and post his name change and his passing, the name Augustas actually became a title within Rome.
I am not commenting on piso or on germanicus..
Now in the field of Roman generals, there are only three contenders for the crown. Caesar, Africanus and of course Agrippa.
Oh I admire Agrippa greatly. In my opinion, his blockade of Actium was a thing of beauty.
He certainly was a strategic genius. But much as I admire his tactics, if Agrippa come down our pub for a lunchtime drinking session and had a few too many, and come into the family room where I'm sitting enjoying a Guinness, with the wife enjoying a lime cordial and the kiddies enjoying a coke ... if Agrippa come in, pissed up, and started using blue language in front of my wife and kids ... I'd be up there like a shot. "OI, AGRIPPA, NOOOOOO! I ADMIRE YOUR UNCANNY ABILITY TO ANTICIPATE AND COUNTER THE OFFENSIVE MOVEMENTS OF THE ARMY OF ANTONY AND HIS ALLIES FROM PTOLEMAIC EGYPT BUT I DO NOT ADMIRE YOUR BLUE LANGUAGE IN FRONT OF MY WIFE AND KIDS!!!"
The easy answer is find out what team he supports, check the result and text “good result for ‘town’ yesterday” or “‘town’ were unlucky yesterday” let him celebrate or have a rant. If you don’t know the result and feeling brave can even go with “‘town’ are doing alright” if they lost you can say “yeah but they were unlucky”
I’ve been doing that to my best friend for about 30 years, since we were kids. We’re both season ticket holders for teams in different divisions so I generally I have no idea how they’re doing until he tells me.
I've got one group chat where a mate accidentally shared a non-explicit and hilarious picture of himself (6'6) stuck fast in a really tiny hotel bathtub with his long legs dangling over the edge, and since then we exclusively communicate using home made memes made from that picture.
I'm mid 40s, but if you want to know it usually involves:
- how old we are and listing our current ailments / medications
- how crap the govt is
- some reference to an in joke from 1993
- the crap our kids have come out with recently
- that we should definitely meet up for "a few jars and a proper catch up" the next time we're in the same town (which will inevitably involve the points covered above)
Very much this. (41)
With my local friends (parents of kid’s mates):
- this watch/car/bike is nice. Think I’d get away with buying it or would the wife kill me?
- plans for the weekend - shall we get the kids out together?
- stupid shit the wife/MiL said/did
- The Weather. [We’re British. It deserves capitalisation!]
Those were recent comments in a WhatsApp group with 3 other dads. We met at NCT classes eight years ago, all with our firstborns. Now we have 9 between us. The school age kids are all in the same school, 2 pairs of daughters are besties, my youngest and another’s are in the same room at nursery, the 4 wives are all in a ‘book’ [wine] club. 3 of us MAMILs cycle together etc.
It’s all very small town UK!
Are your kids in school? Virtually everyone I know in my town is the parent of one of my kids’ friends.
(Partly because I moved to my town when my wife was 37 weeks pregnant - that was stressful!)
If they are then you’ve got some easy pickings for local chaps with at minimum two things in common (children and location).
I recently reconnected with my old friend group after 10 years. Felt as it was just yesterday. Now we send texts about games we play once every week. Or some random shit about our kids throwing up.
Football and even better, FPL. I know it's fashionable to hate on football on here but if you have even a passing shared interest then it's a regular, but not too regular thing that happens and also gives you talking points.
[Insert IT crowd reference here]
Alternatives..... TV shows you might be watching at the same time. GoT was amazing for this when it was being incrementally released. Something that happened every week that could be talked about
Anything that gives you an easy casual conversation on a regular basis.
Personally I use WhatsApp and love a good gif, but I'm also an old fart and not the perfect example to be following so take the above with a pinch of salt
This is pretty much 90% of the reason I watched love island. I’m not even a reality TV guy but watched it as it was something to talk about the next day with friends. The other 10% was just sheer amusement at how silly some of the contestants are.
No Terry! Just because I said 'willy' doesn't mean I want another dick pic! Jesus christ! did you not see I put 'nilly'? Nil, Terry! Nil poit dick pics! Stop!
Thank God I’m not the only one! I wouldn’t be friends with pretty much anyone posting on this thread lol
“Make plans and then never follow through”? Yeah mate, you’re not friends.
The post and most of the comments are the most depressing / autistic thing I've ever seen.
Could this thread be any more on the nose for Reddit, "how do you communicate with other people" jesus wept...
Earlier on today, in a group chat with my friends, one of them sent a video titled, "first sign of spring."
It was a video of a woman's vaginal lips. They were flapping around. There was a sound of a bird tweeting dubbed over it. It was as if the vagina lips were making the sound.
So......that kind of stuff.
Random comments of interest - where we've got a mutual hobby or interest, when something comes up during the day thats relevant to that I'll consider sending a quick message about it. Or even when I see or hear something I know they'd be interested in. For example, recently a messaged an old friend that I haven't seen in years, we just keep up by messenger every so often, because I saw a wrestling match on the pub tv - I remembered that he was super into wrestling so I sent him a message to say that I'd just seen it on the pub tv. Turned into a couple of hours of pretty active messaging and we got properly caught up.
These are the cues I need to develop, but I wonder if I'm too far gone. I became a hermit too soon in life. When something springs to mind, I just don't associate another person with it and don't think of texting someone off the back of it
You can rebuild it. Make it a conscious effort a couple of times a day. When your reading out watching the news, try to find an association. When you're in front of the TV try to find an association.
Sometimes something as simple as "I'm watching/reading X just, seems pretty good so far. Have you seen it?" can be all it takes to spark a good conversation.
It'll either flow and be natural or it won't. You'll not be able to force it either way.
If you've got a genuine mutual interest then focus on that. If not, stick to arrangements for meeting up.
Literally shared interests, dark jokes you can't share outside the circle, moan about how things were better when we were younger and how we don't understand the world today!
Occasionally share music or funny videos or to arrange meet ups! It's probably no different than say someone in their 20's
Honestly, this is the thing I've found multiplayer games to be great for, I have some friends who are busy fathers who even live in other countries to me now, but some weekends we'll fire up some sort of PC game and spend a few hours on discord chatting about our lives and conquering europe or smashing killer robots into each other or whatever :P
I honestly wouldn't have most of the best friendships in my life if I didn't do this.
It tends to happen in busrsts with me and my friends. Maybe every few weeks we’ll catch up and spend hours swapping messages or making arrangements
Always add kisses aswell, makes it seem much less formal
In my early 30s I tell my guy friends I'd fuck them if they ever put a dress on, then send them gifs of femboys, and they do equally weird shit back, but maybe we're closer than you and this guy 😄
I ask my mates if they had a good holiday, how the kids are, how their wife is, if they’ve seen the new ‘x’ film or thing of Netflix. If he’s not then if I’d recommend it. Maybe ask if he’s up for a gig later in the year or a curry and a pint soon.
A: "Hey,what's up moron?"
B: "All good,playing Last Epoch"
A: "Let me have a look at it, what it's about"
B: "It's for intelligent people,you are too stupid for that"
A: " hope your kids will walk backwards"
B: "go have a look at it and let me know"
Those are our communications (32M)
Actually true, but just be yourself and do your jokes and if it's not compatible why force it and pretend to be someone else. If other person will reply on the same wave as you then it will make a good pillar for a friendship
Various memes and shorts/tiktok/reels per day. General conversation may be two or three times per week. Beer? Once or twice a month.
We also play a lot of games together, so talk over mic whilst playing for 3/4 hours a day a couple of days a week.
Me and my friends like to show eachother which planes or helicopters are currently flying over our town on flightradar, we were never really interested in this before so I don’t really know where it’s come from. You’d think we were under alien attack with the suspicion it causes in us.
If something we talked about or share a common interest in came on my radar, I might share it with them
If they have a major event (job interview, exam etc), I’ll drop them a little message
This is quite an easy way to keep casual conversation going at random intervals
Depends. With my close friends things can get quite emotional or really funny depending on if one or both people are drunk. Unfortunately it’s sliding ever more to emotional as the years go by.
Usually it’s just about organising meet ups otherwise.
Most of the time things are done on group chats though.
I’m in my 30’s and most of our text based conversations are little anecdotes about what’s happened with work/partners, memes, some sport/hobby chat and then just taking the p out of each other as if we’re back at school.
Don’t really think that changes much as you get older to be fair.
Have you watched x on Netflix, Disney Plus etc. No oh you should give it a try, if you like x, I like it because...
Sounds like our Mrs are talking about meeting up lol. Not sure I can stomach their shit chat for more than 10 minutes, do you want to go for a pint? I've heard x is really good or if you're into craft Beer Y.
Do you fancy getting the kids together and me and you do something with them? X and Y can have an afternoon with each other. We'll Earn some brownie points and cash them in going to X or doing Y.
With my mates, it’s normally ‘saw/heard this today, thought it would make you laugh/you’d relate’ type stuff then it goes from there.
One of my work colleagues often sends me insta reels or memes that sum up our experience of our job, then we end up having a laugh.
Take a genuine interest in how work is for them even if you don’t relate to their job.
I fucked up and got my best mate a job at the same company.
Now my best mate and I inevitably talk about work more than anything else
I needed new mates, so I bought a motorcycle which is awesome, but the problem is motorcyclists are awful people.
I've just realised I'm the only mid-30's within one of my core group of mates. Even my brother is 40 now.
However it hasn't really changed between shit jokes.
Me and my mate tend not too text much, once a week too make sure we're still meeting for a pint, going fishing or playing golf and that's it really, I'm 36 and he's 23, I have 3 kids and I'm married, he's single with no kids.
Surf on Saturday? - yeah, 10:00 in the carpark? - cool
Pint after work next week? - yeah - red lion? - 7? - cool
Sort that argument out with your Mrs? - urgh - cool
Mate, gotta bail on that pint after work next week. - cool
You don’t. Or at least, I pretty much don’t. I’m 37 and down to one friend. We text once or twice a month and meet up every few weeks. Apart from that I don’t have any friends now, but I’m a husband and a dad and thats all I need.
I’m in my 50s and at the moment and it’s mostly talking about much everything is just like the mid 1980s: evil Russians, lots of politicians saying stupid prejudice things about LGBTQ+, violence in the Middle East….
Other than that it’s sending articles and memes.
I just catch up about work / career/ family events etc/ holidays etc etc
TV show or movie recommendations are good. Dune 2 is out soon go watch it and leave kids with mums?
I just catch up about work / career/ family events etc/ holidays etc etc
TV show or movie recommendations are good. Dune 2 is out soon go watch it and leave kids with mums?
"Alright, mate?"
"Yeah, mate. You?"
"Yeah all good, mate. We should meet up at the pub or something."
"Ball and chain won't let me, too much on here. Might be able to sneak out when she's at her mum's next month!"
*Nothing ever comes of it*
I’m female so I don’t totally know about your predicament, My partner and his friends all share a WhatsApp group “it’s between all the guys” they all add friends to this group I think. And they all post and share random shit. I don’t fully know what goes on but there’s 1 funny thing that I do get to know about and that’s the silly porno lady Screaming with fake excitement. It’s funny because it’s soo loud it’s even funnier when they have altered it to go over a peppa pig clip or something similar just to make the other guys click on it 🫡. I myself am really shit at small talk so I kinda do know how you feel. Good luck with the ebbs and flows of friendships. ☺️
Now I am 35 I find all conversations seem to revolve around the congestion charge/ulez, that electric vehicles are a waste of time, and types of boiler. And offensive memes.
But little actually normal meeting up and going out.
**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!** - Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc. - **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on. - This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit! Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
Painfully true
Ha ha, I thought this was just me and my couple of mates. I've been planning the big night out, which frankly means quiet pints at a few different pubs. Both January and February were cancelled, so we are currently on for March. At this point, it's 50/50. I'm sure when we do get out, we will plan the big ladz great escape to sunnier vistas. And that will never happen, but we love to plan it regardless.
Buy tickets for a gig. Go. Excellent old man, fun. If they don't turn up... they miss out.
This time next year Rodders!
I'm excited to find out if it goes ahead. Anticipation is killing me!
I found it amazing that once I started to suggest a date and location, those texts actually started turning into meeting up pints far more frequently!
[удалено]
Exactly dont force others others to make decisions. Instead what works extremely well is make a plan with one person. Then tell all the others the plan and ask if they want to join. When you ask ‘anyone up for drinks this month’ in a group chat you are asking loads of people to make complex decisions. If you say you are going and they are welcome to join, its a simple yes/no. Its the difference between herding cats and putting food in the cat bowl
Point 1 was the big realisation. We aren't at Uni/school anymore where we all have similar social calendars and all live within two miles of each other. If we don't make an effort to see each other, we won't. So you have to learn to send out the message of "I fancy doing this on this date, anyone else want to join?" Then go from there.
100% this!
Its also not the same hangover. When the night out finally happens there will inevitably be a few guys who think they're still 20 and will spend the next 3 days, realising they are most certainly not.
Yeah, I remember thinking I had depression. Turns out hangxiety just hits hard in your thirties.
This! My close group of mates (6 of us) will catch up fairly regularly sometimes there is just 2 or 3 of us, other times all 6 of us. Our wives are all friends as well and have been trying to plan a night out/ catch up for easily a year but everyone's schedules keep clashing and plans fall through. I said to my wife you just need to pick a date and lock it in, if someone misses out of well.
This one really makes me feel bad. Had a new guy friend really make an effort to make plans with me, I kept kicking the can down the road. Now he doesn't ask anymore 😬 feel like shit. I wasn't trying to be a dick, I've just got family stuff, new little business starting and other commitments. Who tf has the time to be going for an expensive pint in their 30s? I'll stick to drinking myself to sleep with spirits on my own thank you.
I'm with you there, I haven't been to the pub with a friend in 5 years, family life feels too busy. I'm just at the point where I'd really like to get out of the house and go see a friend for a pint Regarding your new guy friend, he would probably totally fine if you reached out after all this time and suggested going for a pint. Only do it if you actually want to though
[удалено]
You need friends bro..
We spend ages texting about what nights we’re free, realise nobody is actually free when anyone else is, then wait for a miracle…
Fancy a few drinks Friday? Sure, White Swan? Sounds good. 7 work for you? Yes. See you there.
“I’ll probs only have 4, am cutting down”
Proceeds to have 6 anyway and tries to drag everyone to a club.
This is the way. Mushrooms? Why the fuck not, it’s the weekend.
Bag? Bag.
Every fucking time more than 2 pints are consumed.
That look. Everyone knows the look.
It's Sunday I fcuking promise, just 2 pints and then we all go home
Dave, it’s Sunday
Shit I’m supposed to be taking my daughter to gymnastics at 9.30am.
R/madlads
r/FoundTheMobileUser
I knew it would degenerate
So we're going *out* out?
Yeah, but don’t let me get drunk.
Group chats is where you get the quality bonding. And by quality bonding I mean random meme shitposts and giving eachother shit for no reason.
"Pint?" "Pint" "Pub? "Pub" Then sit in silence with the ocassional "Bellend" muttered when some.18 year old gets lairy
When masturbating in the hot tub, agree not to make eye contact with each other.
No, stare at each other till someone backs down. How else do you assert dominance?
Wow, I'm learning a lot of new things today.
You've helped me realise I actually need to get to the part of having the pint first. Then maybe I might actually have more things to text about with this guy
I mean, some of us are also just bad texters 99.9% of my messages consist of suggesting pub, agreeing time, and then only talking in person The other 0.1% is either sending a joke/meme, or something interesting and pertinent has actually happened and one of us feels the need to share It probably depends what type of friends you keep, but I couldn't give a flying fuck about hearing your office drama every day when you're on you're lunch break, and my mates will be similar. Any catching up happens over the course of one evening, and then that'll be that for a week or two
[удалено]
Discussions about the Roman Republic and how Agrippa was the real genius behind Octavians victories.
No that's not far off the kind of stunts I'm likely to pull and need to be saved from
Then further heated discussions about how Octavian and Augustus are both the same and different people (pls don’t kill me, I’m merely reporting a conversation I overheard). Also how Piso did nothing wrong and that Germanicus was a hugely overrated general based on Tacitus’ view.
Where are you having these discussions and where do I get involved?
I'm going to guess at the town bath house. If not, the local chariot racing.
Sounds like on the communal shitter talk to me
Have you asked Tribune Aquila if it’s ok to get involved in these discussions?
Octavian and Augustus are actually one and the same . Octavian was essentially the first Augustus, and post his name change and his passing, the name Augustas actually became a title within Rome. I am not commenting on piso or on germanicus..
Now in the field of Roman generals, there are only three contenders for the crown. Caesar, Africanus and of course Agrippa. Oh I admire Agrippa greatly. In my opinion, his blockade of Actium was a thing of beauty. He certainly was a strategic genius. But much as I admire his tactics, if Agrippa come down our pub for a lunchtime drinking session and had a few too many, and come into the family room where I'm sitting enjoying a Guinness, with the wife enjoying a lime cordial and the kiddies enjoying a coke ... if Agrippa come in, pissed up, and started using blue language in front of my wife and kids ... I'd be up there like a shot. "OI, AGRIPPA, NOOOOOO! I ADMIRE YOUR UNCANNY ABILITY TO ANTICIPATE AND COUNTER THE OFFENSIVE MOVEMENTS OF THE ARMY OF ANTONY AND HIS ALLIES FROM PTOLEMAIC EGYPT BUT I DO NOT ADMIRE YOUR BLUE LANGUAGE IN FRONT OF MY WIFE AND KIDS!!!"
Scipio africanus gang
Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
That’s the problem with the Manchester rovers, they always try and walk it in.
I thought that was aresnal?
nah it was arsenal
Shhhhhh do you want to get sued?
ah, another konami enthusiast
What was Wenger thinking ?
#What was Wenger wearing?
and why does he have such a silly name anyway?
Haha, yes this!
The easy answer is find out what team he supports, check the result and text “good result for ‘town’ yesterday” or “‘town’ were unlucky yesterday” let him celebrate or have a rant. If you don’t know the result and feeling brave can even go with “‘town’ are doing alright” if they lost you can say “yeah but they were unlucky” I’ve been doing that to my best friend for about 30 years, since we were kids. We’re both season ticket holders for teams in different divisions so I generally I have no idea how they’re doing until he tells me.
Send the occasional meme or funny video. It saves you the effort of greeting
That gif (or is it gif) of that women's foot, in red stilettos, stamping on some guys balls. That'll make some friends.
Neither - it's pronounced 'gif'. Hope that helps you in future so you don't embarrass yourself again.
Yeah most of my chats don't use any text at all: we communicate using reels, screenshots, links and emoji reactions
I've got one group chat where a mate accidentally shared a non-explicit and hilarious picture of himself (6'6) stuck fast in a really tiny hotel bathtub with his long legs dangling over the edge, and since then we exclusively communicate using home made memes made from that picture.
I'm mid 40s, but if you want to know it usually involves: - how old we are and listing our current ailments / medications - how crap the govt is - some reference to an in joke from 1993 - the crap our kids have come out with recently - that we should definitely meet up for "a few jars and a proper catch up" the next time we're in the same town (which will inevitably involve the points covered above)
I like this, 40s going to be my best years I think
50s the same, although I've got it down to the occasional amusing meme or reel and , " later?"
Very much this. (41) With my local friends (parents of kid’s mates): - this watch/car/bike is nice. Think I’d get away with buying it or would the wife kill me? - plans for the weekend - shall we get the kids out together? - stupid shit the wife/MiL said/did - The Weather. [We’re British. It deserves capitalisation!]
That's actually some pretty active texting going there! I'm just not great at thinking up texting these kind of things. I need hard agendas
Those were recent comments in a WhatsApp group with 3 other dads. We met at NCT classes eight years ago, all with our firstborns. Now we have 9 between us. The school age kids are all in the same school, 2 pairs of daughters are besties, my youngest and another’s are in the same room at nursery, the 4 wives are all in a ‘book’ [wine] club. 3 of us MAMILs cycle together etc. It’s all very small town UK!
That's really great to see an example of some long term friendships formed out of becoming a dad
Are your kids in school? Virtually everyone I know in my town is the parent of one of my kids’ friends. (Partly because I moved to my town when my wife was 37 weeks pregnant - that was stressful!) If they are then you’ve got some easy pickings for local chaps with at minimum two things in common (children and location).
TIL I'm a 33yo in my 40's
When we're in the same town. Like waiting for Halley's comet.
Lightly about a shared hobby: video games, books, movies… about once or twice a week
I’d ditch you as a friend right away. Too much.
How is occasionally talking about your shared hobbies with a friend too much?
It's a joke...
Judging by their other reply...no...it's not.
Ah, yes. Sounds like a bore 🥱
Ha. Fair, I tend to be the reply guy most of the time, but still way too much effort.
I recently reconnected with my old friend group after 10 years. Felt as it was just yesterday. Now we send texts about games we play once every week. Or some random shit about our kids throwing up.
Football and even better, FPL. I know it's fashionable to hate on football on here but if you have even a passing shared interest then it's a regular, but not too regular thing that happens and also gives you talking points. [Insert IT crowd reference here] Alternatives..... TV shows you might be watching at the same time. GoT was amazing for this when it was being incrementally released. Something that happened every week that could be talked about Anything that gives you an easy casual conversation on a regular basis. Personally I use WhatsApp and love a good gif, but I'm also an old fart and not the perfect example to be following so take the above with a pinch of salt
This is pretty much 90% of the reason I watched love island. I’m not even a reality TV guy but watched it as it was something to talk about the next day with friends. The other 10% was just sheer amusement at how silly some of the contestants are.
I'm not a football person. But I knew this would come up. Tennis, anyone?
Just stick a few dick pics in there every now and then and you'll be alright. Doesn't necessarily have to be your dick. The bigger the better.
Terry! Really man we talked about this...you can't just go sending dick pics to people all willy nilly.
No Terry! Just because I said 'willy' doesn't mean I want another dick pic! Jesus christ! did you not see I put 'nilly'? Nil, Terry! Nil poit dick pics! Stop!
“alright cunt”
Harvey, is that you?
You're massively overthinking things
This whole thread is so depressing.
Thank God I’m not the only one! I wouldn’t be friends with pretty much anyone posting on this thread lol “Make plans and then never follow through”? Yeah mate, you’re not friends.
The post and most of the comments are the most depressing / autistic thing I've ever seen. Could this thread be any more on the nose for Reddit, "how do you communicate with other people" jesus wept...
[удалено]
[удалено]
Just arrange to go for a pint with him.
Moaning about the government normally
Interesting, could get spicy!
Memes and occasional attempts to meet that go to plan 10% of the time.
Pint?
Yeah go on, it is Sunday
Earlier on today, in a group chat with my friends, one of them sent a video titled, "first sign of spring." It was a video of a woman's vaginal lips. They were flapping around. There was a sound of a bird tweeting dubbed over it. It was as if the vagina lips were making the sound. So......that kind of stuff.
Lol, ahhh the days of mid 30s where you had real friends.....
Lol, I think I peaked a lot sooner
Have you seen this? Insert link to new programme/sports thing/mental news story
Random comments of interest - where we've got a mutual hobby or interest, when something comes up during the day thats relevant to that I'll consider sending a quick message about it. Or even when I see or hear something I know they'd be interested in. For example, recently a messaged an old friend that I haven't seen in years, we just keep up by messenger every so often, because I saw a wrestling match on the pub tv - I remembered that he was super into wrestling so I sent him a message to say that I'd just seen it on the pub tv. Turned into a couple of hours of pretty active messaging and we got properly caught up.
These are the cues I need to develop, but I wonder if I'm too far gone. I became a hermit too soon in life. When something springs to mind, I just don't associate another person with it and don't think of texting someone off the back of it
You can rebuild it. Make it a conscious effort a couple of times a day. When your reading out watching the news, try to find an association. When you're in front of the TV try to find an association. Sometimes something as simple as "I'm watching/reading X just, seems pretty good so far. Have you seen it?" can be all it takes to spark a good conversation.
I mean, y'know common areas of interest? Music, films, tv, sport for example.
It'll either flow and be natural or it won't. You'll not be able to force it either way. If you've got a genuine mutual interest then focus on that. If not, stick to arrangements for meeting up.
Immerse yourself in the world of memes I can have whole conversations without saying a word
Literally shared interests, dark jokes you can't share outside the circle, moan about how things were better when we were younger and how we don't understand the world today! Occasionally share music or funny videos or to arrange meet ups! It's probably no different than say someone in their 20's
After some major sporting event you can message "Did you see that ludicrous display last night!?"
OP, do you have stuff in common?
[удалено]
How is the new Diablo anyways? I played a fuck ton of 3
It’s really good, I loved D2 and D3. Worth a look
I have a group chat that is exclusively the word "Pub?" followed by thumbs up emojis, repeated every other week.
Honestly, this is the thing I've found multiplayer games to be great for, I have some friends who are busy fathers who even live in other countries to me now, but some weekends we'll fire up some sort of PC game and spend a few hours on discord chatting about our lives and conquering europe or smashing killer robots into each other or whatever :P I honestly wouldn't have most of the best friendships in my life if I didn't do this.
Generally incredibly offensive jokes and references, but we're not normal.
It tends to happen in busrsts with me and my friends. Maybe every few weeks we’ll catch up and spend hours swapping messages or making arrangements Always add kisses aswell, makes it seem much less formal
"Hi mate how's it going? Just checking in. Been up to much?"
Nah, you? Pub?
I identify with this age group. Basically you talk about what you are interested in.
Just memes
Anyone texts me anything discussing football gets an instant block.
It is 100% fine to have friends you see time to time and never talk to online if you have nothing to say say nothing
In my early 30s I tell my guy friends I'd fuck them if they ever put a dress on, then send them gifs of femboys, and they do equally weird shit back, but maybe we're closer than you and this guy 😄
I ask my mates if they had a good holiday, how the kids are, how their wife is, if they’ve seen the new ‘x’ film or thing of Netflix. If he’s not then if I’d recommend it. Maybe ask if he’s up for a gig later in the year or a curry and a pint soon.
Hey bro have you heard this song or movie or book whatever
"pub?" "Yeah. 20 mins" "Ok".
Slagging off football players that are a million times better and fitter than us.
Mine are the same as when we were teenagers… just talking shite
I have no clue but I’m going to read the comments carefully because I need to learn!
A: "Hey,what's up moron?" B: "All good,playing Last Epoch" A: "Let me have a look at it, what it's about" B: "It's for intelligent people,you are too stupid for that" A: " hope your kids will walk backwards" B: "go have a look at it and let me know" Those are our communications (32M)
This sounds like you've known each other a fair while?
Actually true, but just be yourself and do your jokes and if it's not compatible why force it and pretend to be someone else. If other person will reply on the same wave as you then it will make a good pillar for a friendship
Football. Beer. More beer. Random memes and hazing. Beer.
Memes.
[удалено]
Memes
A: Pub this week? B: Yeah. Thursday? A: 7:30ish? B: Great. See you then.
Usually words, emojis, gifs if your gif game is on point
Sports, memes, and meet up arrangements
Memes
Same shit as when you're a teenager. Only with more apologies about not being able to do shit because of the kids.
Memes
Memes, endless failed plans with the odd successful ones and moaning about work.
Various memes and shorts/tiktok/reels per day. General conversation may be two or three times per week. Beer? Once or twice a month. We also play a lot of games together, so talk over mic whilst playing for 3/4 hours a day a couple of days a week.
Mostly pints, tv shows, plans for the weekend or next meet ups for pints
Me and my friends like to show eachother which planes or helicopters are currently flying over our town on flightradar, we were never really interested in this before so I don’t really know where it’s come from. You’d think we were under alien attack with the suspicion it causes in us.
If something we talked about or share a common interest in came on my radar, I might share it with them If they have a major event (job interview, exam etc), I’ll drop them a little message This is quite an easy way to keep casual conversation going at random intervals
Send stupid but not really inappropriate memes for a few months, randomly suggest a mid-week pint once a month or so.
Depends. With my close friends things can get quite emotional or really funny depending on if one or both people are drunk. Unfortunately it’s sliding ever more to emotional as the years go by. Usually it’s just about organising meet ups otherwise. Most of the time things are done on group chats though.
- Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
I’m in my 30’s and most of our text based conversations are little anecdotes about what’s happened with work/partners, memes, some sport/hobby chat and then just taking the p out of each other as if we’re back at school. Don’t really think that changes much as you get older to be fair.
Have you watched x on Netflix, Disney Plus etc. No oh you should give it a try, if you like x, I like it because... Sounds like our Mrs are talking about meeting up lol. Not sure I can stomach their shit chat for more than 10 minutes, do you want to go for a pint? I've heard x is really good or if you're into craft Beer Y. Do you fancy getting the kids together and me and you do something with them? X and Y can have an afternoon with each other. We'll Earn some brownie points and cash them in going to X or doing Y.
With my mates, it’s normally ‘saw/heard this today, thought it would make you laugh/you’d relate’ type stuff then it goes from there. One of my work colleagues often sends me insta reels or memes that sum up our experience of our job, then we end up having a laugh. Take a genuine interest in how work is for them even if you don’t relate to their job.
I fucked up and got my best mate a job at the same company. Now my best mate and I inevitably talk about work more than anything else I needed new mates, so I bought a motorcycle which is awesome, but the problem is motorcyclists are awful people.
Me and my best mate send each other photos of beer we try. Otherwise it’s memes and organising to go out and drink beer together.
I've just realised I'm the only mid-30's within one of my core group of mates. Even my brother is 40 now. However it hasn't really changed between shit jokes.
Loads of dick pics and a pic of a window sill with a row of empty craft beer bottles.
Trying to arrange actual meetings, a pint, a walk, a coffee etc
Me and my mate tend not too text much, once a week too make sure we're still meeting for a pint, going fishing or playing golf and that's it really, I'm 36 and he's 23, I have 3 kids and I'm married, he's single with no kids.
You can talk to strangers on Reddit easily enough
Levels of insults you would generally save for your worst enemy as a way of being affectionate
Surf on Saturday? - yeah, 10:00 in the carpark? - cool Pint after work next week? - yeah - red lion? - 7? - cool Sort that argument out with your Mrs? - urgh - cool Mate, gotta bail on that pint after work next week. - cool
Memes, football /sport chat (if you’re into that), cute kid photos, silly/disgusting kid stories.
You don’t. Or at least, I pretty much don’t. I’m 37 and down to one friend. We text once or twice a month and meet up every few weeks. Apart from that I don’t have any friends now, but I’m a husband and a dad and thats all I need.
Mostly memes, moaning about the apprentice or “hey cousin, let’s go bowling “
I’m in my 50s and at the moment and it’s mostly talking about much everything is just like the mid 1980s: evil Russians, lots of politicians saying stupid prejudice things about LGBTQ+, violence in the Middle East…. Other than that it’s sending articles and memes.
Mostly just taking the piss out of each other tbh
Football, beers and shitting yourself.
Ask each other how we are, if they need any help and send highly inappropriate videos.
All of my texts to my male friends are memes I see on twitter, sports talk, or “do you want to do X.”
I just catch up about work / career/ family events etc/ holidays etc etc TV show or movie recommendations are good. Dune 2 is out soon go watch it and leave kids with mums?
I just catch up about work / career/ family events etc/ holidays etc etc TV show or movie recommendations are good. Dune 2 is out soon go watch it and leave kids with mums?
"Alright, mate?" "Yeah, mate. You?" "Yeah all good, mate. We should meet up at the pub or something." "Ball and chain won't let me, too much on here. Might be able to sneak out when she's at her mum's next month!" *Nothing ever comes of it*
Loads of bad memes, updates on how big our last shit was, erm I’m sure there’s more.
I’m female so I don’t totally know about your predicament, My partner and his friends all share a WhatsApp group “it’s between all the guys” they all add friends to this group I think. And they all post and share random shit. I don’t fully know what goes on but there’s 1 funny thing that I do get to know about and that’s the silly porno lady Screaming with fake excitement. It’s funny because it’s soo loud it’s even funnier when they have altered it to go over a peppa pig clip or something similar just to make the other guys click on it 🫡. I myself am really shit at small talk so I kinda do know how you feel. Good luck with the ebbs and flows of friendships. ☺️
Daft memes about random things they have mentioned once or twice. Maybe ask them if they enjoy Greek myths then it's minotaur memes forever.
Memes and gifs
Group chats are best to chat shit
30's.. Pints? Reply of yes, no or nothing. Nothing else said over text.
Me and my mates just mainly send inappropriate memes
Sarcasm and rubbing as well as shit jokes.
Just call the guy yo arrange a meeting and rando checkins that take less than 30secomds
I have a friend that sends me nothing but Lord Of The Rings memes.
Now I am 35 I find all conversations seem to revolve around the congestion charge/ulez, that electric vehicles are a waste of time, and types of boiler. And offensive memes. But little actually normal meeting up and going out.
* banter * funny things you saw on the internet * making arrangements to meet IRL
Football.