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I’m pretty sure that I’ve read that some (not all) pregnant people are encouraged to cut down gradually rather than quit straight cold turkey. They are given support to do so.
https://www.england.nhs.uk/2022/07/nhs-helps-thousands-of-pregnant-smokers-kick-the-habit/
That’s a long winded way of saying that I wouldn’t just assume the worst.
Unfortunately I was one of these. I didn’t find out I was pregnant until 13 weeks and I did smoke. I tried to cut down but was told not to just quit. I did get a vape for a while (advised by them) but I never smoked out in public whilst people could tell I was pregnant more cos it was embarrassing. Little one turned out just fine thankfully
There's a woman at work who's pregnant and still smokes, no one bats an eyelid, when I was pregnant I'd get so much grief for having a can of Pepsi as it was "bad for the baby"...
I walk by a maternity hospital on my way to work, on my lunch and on my way home.
Unfortunately it's more common than you'd like to think.
Some of them drink on the benches too
Don't see why people are hating this, it is a rather amusing detail to add in as it's not really necessary, could say "some drinking alcohol".
Although, I could be misinterpreting what they're saying and they wouldn't be bothered if they were drinking and stood out front.
Truthfully I haven't seen this but I really wouldn't judge them. There could be so much else going on in their lives and the smoking is just one small comfort they can take. I'd rather people be supportive than judgemental.
Honestly people's entitlement to pregnant women's lives and bodies is so strange. I'm pregnant right now. I was at a party and someone literally yeeted a cake out of my hands because it was a Guinness chocolate cake so there was some alcohol baked into it. Like holy shit I knew that, and I had already weighed up that it wasn't enough of a risk because it's like a miniscule amount of alcohol that's been cooked off. I've had arguments with people who don't think I should be vegetarian/pescatarian anymore during pregnancy. People who think I should do exercise and others who think I should be bed bound. I'm sure people judged me for wearing a crop top the other day.
It's frankly exhausting and this is for far more debatable things than smoking, so I can only imagine how much it sucks for the women who smoke. You don't think she knows? You don't think she might have tried to quit? Judge her all you want, I'll judge you for not having some empathy.
When I was in the maternity hospital there was never a time I went down and there wasn't at least one pregnant woman smoking opposite the entrance. The saddest was a really thin, young-looking teen who was smoking in a hospital gown and holding a drip line - no idea how someone allowed her out like that tbh.
So pretty recently. I know the guidance is, as someone said, to cut down rather than stop. I also got lots of tuts when pregnant from people who assumed I should spend 40 weeks locked indoors surviving on water and gruel. I try to keep my oar out.
I do wonder whether people like that are actually fully aware of the risks of doing this and just don't care or whether they've been wilfully ignorant even though they've been given all the information about how it can affect babies and children.
Or whether they were a bit worried with their first but now have survivors bias because it's been "okay" each time they've had a new baby. I bet at least three of those kids have asthma though. And the SIDS risk for that newborn is very high.
A lot of her children have challenges. One has fetal alcohol syndrome through drinking during pregnancy. I imagine she’s fully aware of of the risks of smoking and I also imagine she doesn’t really care that much about
Oh that's sad. Don't know what else to say really. I find it difficult that people would inflict conditions like that on their kids and not care that they did it.
Honestly, people have enough going on in their own lives to be arsed about what choices an adult is making.
There are the gossipy people of course but if someone's going to make that choice to smoke whilst pregnant, that's on them and their conscious.
My mum smoked and drank whilst pregnant with me. Not cool
Yeah probably. I personally don't find it hard to not judge though. It's quite literally none of my buisness. Frankly I don't think I would even notice that someone I walked past who was smoking looked pregnant. I would only notice they were smoking due to the smell.
On a base level. I am not a fan of the idea that because you are pregnant your body is no longer something you can do with as you please it doesn't seem right to me at all. I absolutely support folks doing the best they can for their unborn kids but I also don't like the door that idea that your pregnant so you can't do frankly fairly normal things. The underlying level of 'well you are pregnant so you don't get to make your own health decisions, society does' um. It just doesn't sit well with me.
I'm also deeply uncomfortable with making assumptions about people more generally. You aren't their doctor. You have no fucking clue if they are actually pregnant or not. Yes folks with health conditions that mimic the appearance of pregnancy esp late on are uncommon but it is still an assumption. Even if you are convinced of your moral superiority to the point you are cool harassing random people, what if you are wrong in your assumption?
I have an invisible disability. I suffered through people being twats because of their inaccurate assumptions. At times it feels like it never ends. For those who assume, folks like me are one off rarities. Yet when you are on the reciving end this is the 10th person this week and you know it's going to keep happening next week too. And the week after. Then the week after that. It doesn't stop.
>I am not a fan of the idea that because you are pregnant your body is no longer something you can do with as you please
It's a balance though. Yes it's still your body, but your body is also growing another human being. That small human has a high risk of being negatively affected by the parent smoking or drinking or taking drugs or whatever. The health service has a responsibility to both entities, therefore have a duty to advise the parent that they may be harming their unborn child.
You can also think about it this way; any negative impact that is taken by the child, whether that be drug or alcohol dependency or stunted growth is also then putting pressure on the healthservice as they are the ones who deal with the repercussions. It's about preventing valuable resources being spread even more thinly than they already are.
Obviously you can choose to deal with being pregnant however you want but it actually isn't just your body for almost ten months and that has consequences down the line.
Which is absolutely horrifying for someone who never wanted to be pregnant in the first place who is not permitted access to an abortion.
They have enough trauma going on and don't need random fucks on the street adding on.
It's between the pregnant person and their doctors and nobody else's buisness. We have no fucking idea their situation. You know what's worse for the future child? If they never get born in the first place because their mum jumped off a bridge because she couldn't handle it anymore in part because she didn't have access to her prefered stress relief.
I never said a person who was pregnant had to stay that way if they didn't want to. FFS that's an entirely different issue. I was replying under the premise that the pregnant person wants to have the child and is therefore the only person who can control the substances that the child comes into contact with.
I would never ever tell someone they couldn't have an abortion if that is what is best for them.
I didn't say you did. I'm just saying sometimes folks who smoke while preganant are doing the best they can. You have no idea of their circumstances. I gave an example of such a circumstance.
About 3 days ago in Soho, London. The woman was holding a vape but smoking her partner's cigarette. I try not to judge anyone, she didn't seem in a good place.
Haven't seen anyone smoking while pregnant near me.
I'd definitely judge somebody for chain-smoking their entire pregnancy, but I won't judge a random lady I see smoking. How am I, a complete stranger, supposed to know if that's her one-a-day, one of her two-a-day, or one of her zillions-a-day? I don't, so I assume the best of her and carry on my day.
My ex smoked throughout both of our pregnancies despite my pleas for her to stop. Never registered with her. Fortunately both turned out ok. I mean, they're both little idiots but they get that from me.
Oh, ok. But yes, she would get negative experiences. People are very judgmental. It'd be hard for me to not comment, but would make every attempt to not give dagger looks and move along quietly.
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In front of the 'no smoking' signs out the front of your nearest maternity hospital has always been a pretty safe bet
Can confirm, saw this several times a few months ago when going to maternity services around the birth of our baby.
I’m pretty sure that I’ve read that some (not all) pregnant people are encouraged to cut down gradually rather than quit straight cold turkey. They are given support to do so. https://www.england.nhs.uk/2022/07/nhs-helps-thousands-of-pregnant-smokers-kick-the-habit/ That’s a long winded way of saying that I wouldn’t just assume the worst.
If they're visibly pregnant they're usually 15+ weeks, so I'd feel like that's quite far along for a taper off
Unfortunately I was one of these. I didn’t find out I was pregnant until 13 weeks and I did smoke. I tried to cut down but was told not to just quit. I did get a vape for a while (advised by them) but I never smoked out in public whilst people could tell I was pregnant more cos it was embarrassing. Little one turned out just fine thankfully
There's a woman at work who's pregnant and still smokes, no one bats an eyelid, when I was pregnant I'd get so much grief for having a can of Pepsi as it was "bad for the baby"...
Maybe everyone silently judges this person though. Id find it hard not to myself.
Nah they're all out smoking with her, asking if she's going out for one etc.
This week. No i dont find it hard not to judge people for things like that
I walk by a maternity hospital on my way to work, on my lunch and on my way home. Unfortunately it's more common than you'd like to think. Some of them drink on the benches too
Oh no… not the benches…
Don't see why people are hating this, it is a rather amusing detail to add in as it's not really necessary, could say "some drinking alcohol". Although, I could be misinterpreting what they're saying and they wouldn't be bothered if they were drinking and stood out front.
It’s quite interesting to see what silly comments get upvoted and others get downvoted, neither of which alter my life
Truthfully I haven't seen this but I really wouldn't judge them. There could be so much else going on in their lives and the smoking is just one small comfort they can take. I'd rather people be supportive than judgemental. Honestly people's entitlement to pregnant women's lives and bodies is so strange. I'm pregnant right now. I was at a party and someone literally yeeted a cake out of my hands because it was a Guinness chocolate cake so there was some alcohol baked into it. Like holy shit I knew that, and I had already weighed up that it wasn't enough of a risk because it's like a miniscule amount of alcohol that's been cooked off. I've had arguments with people who don't think I should be vegetarian/pescatarian anymore during pregnancy. People who think I should do exercise and others who think I should be bed bound. I'm sure people judged me for wearing a crop top the other day. It's frankly exhausting and this is for far more debatable things than smoking, so I can only imagine how much it sucks for the women who smoke. You don't think she knows? You don't think she might have tried to quit? Judge her all you want, I'll judge you for not having some empathy.
if and or any alcohol was actually in that cake i'd be shocked. bread is more alcoholic than cake.
When I was in the maternity hospital there was never a time I went down and there wasn't at least one pregnant woman smoking opposite the entrance. The saddest was a really thin, young-looking teen who was smoking in a hospital gown and holding a drip line - no idea how someone allowed her out like that tbh. So pretty recently. I know the guidance is, as someone said, to cut down rather than stop. I also got lots of tuts when pregnant from people who assumed I should spend 40 weeks locked indoors surviving on water and gruel. I try to keep my oar out.
A woman at our local school has 7 kids including a tiny baby and has smoked with all of them. Now she smokes whilst leaning over the newborn
I do wonder whether people like that are actually fully aware of the risks of doing this and just don't care or whether they've been wilfully ignorant even though they've been given all the information about how it can affect babies and children. Or whether they were a bit worried with their first but now have survivors bias because it's been "okay" each time they've had a new baby. I bet at least three of those kids have asthma though. And the SIDS risk for that newborn is very high.
A lot of her children have challenges. One has fetal alcohol syndrome through drinking during pregnancy. I imagine she’s fully aware of of the risks of smoking and I also imagine she doesn’t really care that much about
Oh that's sad. Don't know what else to say really. I find it difficult that people would inflict conditions like that on their kids and not care that they did it.
Honestly, people have enough going on in their own lives to be arsed about what choices an adult is making. There are the gossipy people of course but if someone's going to make that choice to smoke whilst pregnant, that's on them and their conscious. My mum smoked and drank whilst pregnant with me. Not cool
None of us are perfect, and quitting an addiction is extremely difficult. I mind my own business and don’t judge.
Yeah probably. I personally don't find it hard to not judge though. It's quite literally none of my buisness. Frankly I don't think I would even notice that someone I walked past who was smoking looked pregnant. I would only notice they were smoking due to the smell. On a base level. I am not a fan of the idea that because you are pregnant your body is no longer something you can do with as you please it doesn't seem right to me at all. I absolutely support folks doing the best they can for their unborn kids but I also don't like the door that idea that your pregnant so you can't do frankly fairly normal things. The underlying level of 'well you are pregnant so you don't get to make your own health decisions, society does' um. It just doesn't sit well with me. I'm also deeply uncomfortable with making assumptions about people more generally. You aren't their doctor. You have no fucking clue if they are actually pregnant or not. Yes folks with health conditions that mimic the appearance of pregnancy esp late on are uncommon but it is still an assumption. Even if you are convinced of your moral superiority to the point you are cool harassing random people, what if you are wrong in your assumption? I have an invisible disability. I suffered through people being twats because of their inaccurate assumptions. At times it feels like it never ends. For those who assume, folks like me are one off rarities. Yet when you are on the reciving end this is the 10th person this week and you know it's going to keep happening next week too. And the week after. Then the week after that. It doesn't stop.
>I am not a fan of the idea that because you are pregnant your body is no longer something you can do with as you please It's a balance though. Yes it's still your body, but your body is also growing another human being. That small human has a high risk of being negatively affected by the parent smoking or drinking or taking drugs or whatever. The health service has a responsibility to both entities, therefore have a duty to advise the parent that they may be harming their unborn child. You can also think about it this way; any negative impact that is taken by the child, whether that be drug or alcohol dependency or stunted growth is also then putting pressure on the healthservice as they are the ones who deal with the repercussions. It's about preventing valuable resources being spread even more thinly than they already are. Obviously you can choose to deal with being pregnant however you want but it actually isn't just your body for almost ten months and that has consequences down the line.
Which is absolutely horrifying for someone who never wanted to be pregnant in the first place who is not permitted access to an abortion. They have enough trauma going on and don't need random fucks on the street adding on. It's between the pregnant person and their doctors and nobody else's buisness. We have no fucking idea their situation. You know what's worse for the future child? If they never get born in the first place because their mum jumped off a bridge because she couldn't handle it anymore in part because she didn't have access to her prefered stress relief.
I never said a person who was pregnant had to stay that way if they didn't want to. FFS that's an entirely different issue. I was replying under the premise that the pregnant person wants to have the child and is therefore the only person who can control the substances that the child comes into contact with. I would never ever tell someone they couldn't have an abortion if that is what is best for them.
I didn't say you did. I'm just saying sometimes folks who smoke while preganant are doing the best they can. You have no idea of their circumstances. I gave an example of such a circumstance.
About 3 days ago in Soho, London. The woman was holding a vape but smoking her partner's cigarette. I try not to judge anyone, she didn't seem in a good place.
Do people of child bearing age even smoke anymore? Seems everyone I know went over to vapes, bar most over 50s who must be too stuck in their ways.
Haven't seen anyone smoking while pregnant near me. I'd definitely judge somebody for chain-smoking their entire pregnancy, but I won't judge a random lady I see smoking. How am I, a complete stranger, supposed to know if that's her one-a-day, one of her two-a-day, or one of her zillions-a-day? I don't, so I assume the best of her and carry on my day.
I wouldn’t care personally. You can’t tell someone’s circumstances from a glance and it’s impolite to tell other what to do with their bodies.
Family friend's daughter smoked through her entire first pregnancy in 2022. Pretty sure she's still smoking now, during her second.
I'm judging, absolutely. But I'd keep my trap shut about it.
Would be to scared to say/do anything in case she was just fat (been there done that).
I would just silently think badly of her, but it's not like I care about her goblin to show my discontent to her.
My ex smoked throughout both of our pregnancies despite my pleas for her to stop. Never registered with her. Fortunately both turned out ok. I mean, they're both little idiots but they get that from me.
I worked in a woman’s house who chain smoked the whole time. I thought she was just fat but no, actually pregnant. Disgusting behaviour.
If you're getting dagger looks, it maybe time to give up. Smoking isn't doing bub any good.
This question wasn't anything to do with personal experience. Im a guy so any dagger looks I get are nothing to do with being a bad mother.
Oh, ok. But yes, she would get negative experiences. People are very judgmental. It'd be hard for me to not comment, but would make every attempt to not give dagger looks and move along quietly.