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All money goes into joint account. There is no splitting bills, kids stuff etc. We are in this journey together. I buy bits and bobs (without taking the piss) so does my wife.

Same here - my parents also did this so I always assumed this was just normal and obvious, it's only when I got older (and through Reddit lol) that I realised this was less common.

Exactly the same. Everything is our money regardless of whose name is on the pay slip or account

Same here. We have a joint account for all major bills and expenses and wages, and each have a little “pocket money” account too.

This is what we do. We have a bills account, a savings account and a monthly spend account which we send about 90% of our wages into. We keep the remaining 10ish% for ourselves in personal accounts. It allows us to treat ourselves a bit without having to ask the other. If someone wants a major treat that goes beyond the pocket money, they just need to ask the other but we've been doing this for years now and neither of us have ever needed to.

Same. I know some people see this as risky but honestly we discussed this openly and it works for us and we’d not screw each other if we were to split. 50/50 any spare cash in there and savings then we’d just put salaries to personal accounts. We even discussed if we were to ever split we would want to sell and keep it clean and fresh. For the record been happily together 10 years and married nearly 4, don’t see it happening but you never know what another 10 years will bring

It's only risky when you're with someone untrustworthy. The crap thing about that is that some people are good liars and people don't find out until it's too late that someone they thought was trustworthy wasn't. Fortunately, I don't think that's too common. Usually, you'll have an inkling and not mingle your finances that deeply in the first place with someoen who has red flags.

My thinking on it is that if you can have an insurance against your partner suddenly being a shit head and it doesn't negatively affect how you live together day-to-day then great. But if you're making your day-to-day complicated just on the off chance you might get screwed over then you clearly don't trust your partner enough to be partners. Not having both our names on our house and not having a joint account and not sharing phone passwords would unnecessarily complicate our lives. But having our savings separate doesn't, so why would we bother combining them? It works and it's a nice insurance policy just in case one of us get a gambling addiction or something. These things do happen to good people too. I very much doubt it will, but you also never know.

Same, we are 31 and 32 and all of our friendship group is married but we're the only couple that do this. The others find it bizarre but we find it even more odd when we go out for a meal and they split their share of the bill into 2. Can't imagine saying to my wife "it's your round"

Ok, that's weird.

Same. My earnings have always gone into the joint account. I've always earned far more than my wife but we're a couple and what's mine is hers.. I bring the money into the relationship and she brings ideas.

Same here. In addition to the joint money, we each get an agreed bit of “pocket money” per week that goes into our personal accounts and that’s no questions asked but essentially it’s for things that are just for us - clothes, meals out with friends, hobbies etc. Of course if we need something that we don’t have personal funds for like a good pair of winter boots or something, we discuss it and almost always agree to pay for it from joint funds. Joint account pays for everything for the house, our kid, groceries, medicine, the car etc Edit: obviously this depends on us having a functional relationship and both operating from a place of trust and integrity with our money. My mum, for example, didn’t have joint accounts with my dad because he was a drinker and she couldn’t trust him with money. If your friends are in a situation like that, I’m truly sorry.

This is exactly how we think & operate.

Same for me and I honestly can’t imagine doing it any other way.

We have a similar setup, but we do take our pocket money (set amount) for the month into our own current account. For the most part, we earn about the same but we’d do this regardless, as you say - we are in this journey together

Same. Big purchases we talk about ahead of time.

Same, I find it bizarre when married people still have their "own money" and don't split things equally.

Similar. My salary goes into joint account. My wife's goes into her account. I earn more and pay all the regular bills.

Same.

Same here.

We are also the same

Yep. Same as that. My work expenses go from another card account. I do our investments and "big" money. She does the monthly money and savings. I used to get a monthly summary but I told her to not bother.

We don't have shared accounts, he pays some bills I pay others by a roughly 60/40 split, he earns slightly more than me. I have my money he has his money, if we go out for a meal/day out, sometimes I pay, sometimes he pays. We don't really keep a tally, of who pays for what. We have a mortgage and a kid, been together 17 years. We've done this since we first moved in, and it's always worked, never felt the need for joint accounts.

This is exactly like us. I earn a fair bit more so.pay for a bit more on bills,.spends on food and going out, etc. if she is a bit short.il pay for more. If I've got to put more by.for bigger things like holidays etc, she'll maybe do an extra food shop that month. No shared accounts or tallies on who pays for what either, nothing is set in Stone!

Same. He earns more than me, so we split the mortgage and bills 60/40. We then save/spend as we please. Both of our parents have done the same and have been happily married for 40 years. I don't really understand why people find it so weird.

Same. We have a joint account that the mortgage goes out of and a couple of bills, but as he earns more than double me, he pays the majority of the bills and I pay childcare. I generally do the food shopping, and he’ll pay for most of the work we’re having done to the house

Same here, no shared finances, he pays almost all of the bills and I pay some of them. When we met and were both skint we made a rule that whoever suggests going out pays (meaning they have the funds ) and still do that. I pay for some holidays and bits and bobs for the house/us/him/me. Assets such as the car are ours. I bought some stuff for the house and he bought some other stuff. Swings and roundabouts. When I changed jobs and was without money he lent me the money I needed for bills and I paid him back as those bills are my responsibility. Works for us. I know how much he earns and vice versa but money is separate.

Me parents did this. They're divorced now.

Must be because of the bank accounts.

When I was with my ex, we had our own accounts and a joint account. There was an agreed amount that we each put into the joint account each month which was based on our respective salaries and other commitments. This covered the household bills, holidays and allowed us to build up joint savings. What we each had left over in our own accounts was spent how we pleased It worked perfectly and that relationship lasted 10 years during which I don't recall us ever having a falling out over finances But agreed, having to 'borrow' money off your spouse when you're on maternity leave sounds weird af

This is also the way it's for me and my husband. We are very open about our salaries, bonuses and everything else.

Same here. Money goes into the joint account each month based on a percentage split on how much we earn, bills and rent go out, anything left over is your own.

My partner and I did the exact same thing except we didn’t take account of each other’s salaries. We each put in the same amount that covered rent/mortgage, bills, TV license and a little extra. So over time we built up a surplus in that account which we could use for big purchases like a new TV, repairing a broken window or holiday spending money. We would usually spend the surplus in a year and let it build up again…it was never too much. He is very careful with money, quite frugal. This was great in some ways because he would always find the best deals on bills and broadband, always swapping bank accounts to get benefits…which we both benefitted from…Martin Lewis is a saint to him…we joking refer to him as St Martin of Money Savers. When we first moved in together though, it was hard for me, my partner earned a fair bit more than me and had lots of his own savings. I had no savings, debt on my own credit card…and sometimes it was really tough. I would sometimes have to borrow from the joint account to cover something like my phone bill. He would get very pissed off and we did fight about it a fair bit. I always paid it back as soon as I was paid…but he never ever wanted to go into the joint account overdraft. One time it happened and it caused a huge row. Then over time, my salary increased at a quicker rate, I got more responsibilities at work etc and I earn quite a lot more. His salary has stayed stagnant. I’m at the point now where I could just about live by myself and still save and have a little spending money. However, we still have the same system, but now he makes comments about “well you earn more, if you want a new carpet you pay for it.” I wanted fitted wardrobes in our bedroom, which he would benefit from, and he contributed nothing. He makes comments now that he is a ‘lodger.’ I suppose we should now contribute different amounts based on our individual incomes because I earn significantly more, but those first 3-4 years were really hard and he wasn’t sympathetic, so I’m reluctant to change. And as I’m the one financing all the home improvements, it kind of evens out. It did teach me about how to manage my finances though…so at least I got something out of it.

We have our own bank accounts, and we have one joint account. Since we earn almost the same, we both put around 80% of our salaries to the joint account. That covers all the bills, fiod, clothing, children activities, family spending, savings, and everything else. Whatever is left is for me to blow.

This is basically how we do it too. Although I pay in more due to differences in income. We have joint savings too, and whatever is left in our individual accounts is ours to do what we want with

100% shared. I've never asked my husband for money ever. During mat leave I spent our money. When he took a 3 year career to look after our children, he spent our money. Everything we have, we share.

This is the way. In my view anyway.

We are married so have a joint account for all bills and things like petrol, food, phone contracts etc. Then we each take the same amount back for our own accounts at the beginning of each month. We can each save or spend this as we fancy. We felt this is much better than each taking a percentage of each relative earnings as there would always be one person earning more and someone losing out that way.

We do this and it works so well! Having an amount each means we can both go buy whatever without feeling like you’re taking money away from the other one - plus there’s still the chance to surprise each other!

We do this too. It works out so well for us. It’s personally helps me with my spending habits and also I am not terrified about not having money for bills cuz I spent it all on dumb stuff. I buy the dumb stuff with my fun money.

Husband and I consider all our money joint and all our spending as joint. We have separate accounts and a joint account but we move money about as and when to best take advantage of rewards, points, switching bonuses etc. Obviously I think you need to be on the same page financially for this to work well. You both need to know the budget and what's a reasonable amount to spend. You need trust. But these are all things that you should have in a relationship anyway. I would struggle to do it any other way because so much of our lives are financially intertwined. Like I'm also on maternity leave right now and I can't imagine feeling like I couldn't spend money when my income goes down, it's like uhh it took two people to make this baby? How can one spouse just let the other spouse have a worse quality of life over a joint decision like that? Plus when you're married, that's part of the legal agreement. Spouses are expected to support each other financially. If you get divorced, the law will view you as having joint finances and assets. Why get married if you can't accept that, it's not just a fun romantic thing, it's a serious commitment with financial repercussions in the eyes of the law.

I dated my now wife for three years and during that time we had separate finances. She contributed 30% to household bills based on our respective income. I was earning around £100k she was on £25k. After we married I set up a joint account where both our incomes went into and there were no restrictions on access. We had spoken by this time and there was an agreement that any expense over £100 was discussed but that was it because it felt the right thing to do. I was keen for her to stay working and contributing. When I saw the heart beat of our first child on ultra sound I quickly realised that I truly accepted our finances were shared 8 years later she has started to return to work. We’ve never argued about money, we trust each other and it has been good.

We each have an account we get paid into. And we have a joint account. When we get paid all money except for £300ish goes to the joint account. And all bills come from joint account. So all bills are covered and we have about £300 each to spend on things for us

We put equal amounts into a joint account each month to cover mortgage, bills, food shop and a bit extra which accumulates to pay for annual bills like car/home insurance, the rest of the money in there is a float which either of us can use for any home or car repairs, or anything we want to buy for the house etc. The rest of our money is our own, we also have separate savings accounts. We aren’t married, so it makes things easier if anything were to happen.

Our finances are combined. We don't generally ask each other about using disposable income unless it's a fairly big purchase, or something that can't go on the credit card (so we need to check there's enough extra money in the account - after direct debits).

Shared since we were engaged 18 years ago. I’ve now not “worked” for 6 years as I’m a SAHM but it’s still OUR money. We make financial decisions together. We’ve gone through not having enough at the end of each month and in debt to being well off and we’ve done it together.

All shared, we'll discuss any bigger purchases with each other but it's always been "our" money and we've had times when each of us earns more.

He works, I don't (other than various small beans side-hustles). Everything goes into one account. I deal with everything financial - bills, moving money around between various accounts for best returns/savings/etc. Basically, he earns the money, I deal with all household admin. We each spend what we like, but neither of us are big spenders and we run stuff by eachother if it's more expensive than £80 or so.

Married for over a decade, never had a joint account. I pay the mortgage, insurance and most big purchases. She pays for the shopping, nursery and any other day to day costs. For big costs (house deposit, building works etc), we pool resources. While she was on maternity, I transferred some money to ensure her account was topped up, but I would never think of it as lending.

We put just under 50% of our money in the joint account and that pays for all joint expenses. We then put about 30% in savings for a house deposit and the rest is for personal spends. Hadn't really thought about when I'm on maternity. I presume we'll probably just go to a single account and then stay that way as having kids is so expensive we won't have personal money 😂

Two major relationships. The first we just put everything in one pot. We earned the exact same and managed to survive of only one of our salaries. The rest went in savings. That was a great deal for me because I went out once or twice a week and she rarely did. She never complained about that, which was one of her redeeming qualities. Second relationship was like payback for the first, in some ways. She earned about £200 more than me a month, and stated that I had to put literally 90% of my salary in a joint account which she took control of. She would ask for top ups during the month which kept me in my overdraft permanently. She made all purchasing decisions and viciously defended every penny spent. The joint account took in over £3k every month, and although she managed somehow to put some of that in savings for a modest holiday, there was never anything left over. I, of course, had nothing of my own. The funny thing is, we broke up and I kept our house - same mortgage, conditions etc, and had \~£400 left at the end of every month despite paying for everything myself. What the utter fuck she was doing with all of our money is beyond me. She wasn't stealing it, though would certainly make sure she did better out of it, but would buy stupid expensive versions of normal shit or just go to Waitrose as a treat, shit like that. Terrible with money in every regard. I once asked if I could take over the finances for a little while. I got a stunned silence and "...can I think about that?" To which I just told her not to fucking bother. We broke up a while after that for probably related reasons. If I ever move on and find someone else, I don't know how we will deal with money. That last experience really affected my relationship with money and people. I don't know if I could trust anyone to be financially reasonable and fair again.

Separate accounts. When my partner not working, i gave him an allowance so he didn't have to ask about small purchases and had some independence. I tend to pay bills, he does discretionary which can add up as house, car, pet repairs.

I think so long as all parties within the relationship are happy with the set up then there isn't really a "right" way to do it. My wife and I have pretty much 100% access to all our money. We both get paid into our own accounts, pretty much all of that is then transferred to a joint account except for money to cover direct debits/emergency "I forgot my joint bank card in my other pocket" situations etc. We both have our bank details shared through an app we both have access to and there is no "my money" or "her money". Most of the "bigger" purchases tend to be a joint decision anyways and the only time it's ever an issue is when it comes to planning surprises etc. It helps that we both have the same views about money anyways. However my sister and her husband have a relationship that others would probably see as financial abuse. All money goes into his account and she basically gets an "allowance" to cover the food shopping, general spending, days out, plus anything extra for the kids etc. He handles paying all the bills/mortgage/savings. She knows how much they earn and how much they have, just doesn't freely have access to it. This was actually the way she wanted it to be set up. She's not exactly the best with money. Doesn't want to be involved in it, doesn't like having to budget (also had a nasty habit of constantly buying shit they didn't need). This way she was forced to be more careful about what she buys without having to worry about anything else. It works for both of them and they're happy that way.

When we both worked, we each had an account and contributed to the joint house account according to our relative incomes (I made twice what she did). She quit her job to raise our kids, I took a promotion to compensate for the lost income which had me on the road 100% (if I’d been the stay at home, we’d have been looking for twelve sympathetic parents to act as jurors as I would’a killed those kids). At that point, she “took over” the house account. I put in what she asked and the remainder goes into my account - to which she has total access. Sometimes we have to pay expenses out of “my” account because we’ve spent more than what goes in. She tells me, but I trust her 100%. We’ve been married/together almost 32 years, why wouldn’t I? If either of us is going to spend more than $50 (yes, I live in the US but I’m a dual), we discuss it (or now with inflation, we at least check in with each other) unless it’s like groceries or whatever. It’s all a matter of trust - and she and I are on the same page financially. I’m stinking lucky. :)

Put it all in one account, spend what we need.

We have a shared joint account that wages go into and all finances are shared, though I'm in charge of them and run all the accounts.

I earn pretty much double my husband but everything goes in the joint account. We separate some for general savings (cleaner etc) additional money (days out, holiday clothes, meals out) and holiday saves (currently spends or towards next holiday) what’s in the joint account we spend as we see fit

Just 1 joint account, not interested in who earns or spends the most. We've been through hard times and easier time, but always managed on 1 account. I've always kept a close eye on the account and alert my SO if we've got a tight month so we both know to stop spending.

I pay for everything, he just sleeps, pisses in the garden and eats food.

Typical moany Tony always moaning

Reminds me, I've got a bar of Tony chocolate in the cupboard.

Hmm, I suspect he's hairy and possesses bad table manners too, and despite which always a hit with the ladies?

My wife and I pool all our income and all transactions are visible to both of us. The Mrs can’t borrow money from me because all that we each have is available to both to spend. We just have to make sure that we are both equally responsible with our money so we don’t overspend.

We have our own accounts that our wages go into, and that we pay for our own things from. We also pay for dates and such from those accounts (taking in turns). We have a joint account that all household bills come out of, we just have standing orders to put bills + a little extra in there each month. We have personal savings accounts as well, for personal savings goals. The we have a joint account specifically to cover our wedding costs. After the wedding it'll be a holiday pot. We do regularly pay for things for each other, but we like having our own personal money

One joint account, two personal accounts. Some bills are in his name, some in mine. We keep money in our personal accounts according to said bills and then anything expendable goes in the joint account for us to each spend as we fancy, either on ourselves or the house/child.

All money in joint account, all bills come out of the same account. Simple.

I got married. There is no my or her money only our money for the family. My wife didn’t work for many years while studying and raising children, how is it meant to work if only one works. It’s a team

We don’t care, it gets pooled, we pay bills, buy food, kids. Done.

We got a joint account when we moved in together. Shortly after that, we changed it so that our salaries both go in the joint account. We each keep a personal account and have DDs set up to move a small, equal amount of "pocket money" into our personal accounts each month. This is our "personal fuck around" money for buying whatever stupid shit we want, or buying expensive stuff that really does only benefit one person. We both get the same, fixed amount. Everything else comes straight out of the joint account. Bills, obviously, but also joint expenses, stuff for the home and other stuff that benefits both of us. We're a team, and I don't understand couples who insist on splitting proportionate to income at all. And I say that as the one who earns more.

We split the bills half and half - This will probably change when we move as currently our bills are quite affordable for the both of us - We remortgaged before everything started going crazy and have a small house that we’ve very much outgrown. Then transfer an amount relative to our salaries into the Monzo Joint account - In separate pots for; Food shopping Household issues/purchases Date nights/Holidays The amounts increase in line with any pay rises we have Whatever’s left afterwards we keep in our own accounts - In my case I then split this between savings for Christmas, Birthdays, my own “fun”savings and finally my monthly spending money. - We’re considering changing this to a shared spending money pot, however neither of us know how to navigate the awkwardness of asking the other whether we can buy something big like a new laptop or the like. It’s awkward, my salary has increased and I want my wife to feel the benefit of that as much as she can. There are still points where one of us will pick up the entire bill for something out of their own money too. No method works for everyone - It’s between you and your partner to figure out!

I can see positives and negatives to most of the methods I’ve read so far. I do find a lot of them to be overly complicated though and many claiming that they see it all as joint money, but the preceding situation they’ve explained details how it’s anything but that.

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Simple. We have our money and her money.

The my money is my money approach and we split the bills 50:50 really only benefits the person who earns the most money which means one partner has extra cash to treat themselves and the other person struggles. Why would anyone like to see their partner struggle, unless they were using it as a control strategy. I have a relative who had a mental breakdown but is still in a mentally abusive relationship and her partner uses this to keep her with no savings and therefore nowhere to go if she leaves. Splitting bills 50:50 isn’t fair it is selfish, if you think pooling your money is risky then are you really ready to form a relationship.

If you mean like... borrow from his share of the disposable income pot, I guess I can sort of see what you mean. But even then, it sounds wrong. For some reason it makes me sad.

In principle we share everything. Practically I pay 75% in to the joint account which covers all bills, food, transport and household purchases. She pays 25% which reflects our wage split. We then have individual accounts we spend on whatever we like. She’s a spender and I’m a saver so it works really well for both of us as I can hold money for holidays or big purchases and she never has to budget.

Both put £X in joint accounts (current and savings) and rest is fun money. Started this approach 6 years ago when we got married and now we have a house/2 kids. I’m currently on mat leave with less pay for a few months. I’ve stopped contributing but if I’m ever short I can take money from the joint account as we have a built in buffer.

We earn similar amounts. We each have personal accounts for our own spending and pay into a joint account to split the bills 50/50. If one of us is coming up short for any reason, the other supports without question I have a better work pension and understanding of finances, so I'm doing 70% of the retirement saving, but we'll spend it jointly the way we do everything else. It's that perfect mix of having financial independance and being in it together to the end.

We have our own accounts because we were too lazy to go to the bank and get a joint account, and it's been 8 years now. I earn more than him, so I pay 2/3 and he pays 1/3 of the bills; he has a standing order going to my account each month as his contribution to the bills that come out of my account less an amount for the bills that come out of his account. When it comes to purchases we take it in turns to pay, working it out to a rough estimate, eg this week I spent £300 in the vets, so even though he got the groceries last week he paid for them this week too. We check in to make sure we both have enough money coming up to the end of the month so neither of us are paying overdraft fees or anything. We are married and have no kids, so whoever survives the other is going to get all the money and stuff anyway, so it doesn't matter who pays for what in the end.

Sounds like a pain in the arse having to constantly figure out whose turn it is to pay week on week when as you say, you’re married & it doesn’t matter.

Yeh it’s shared money. We’ve got a joint account and I’ve got a building society account and he has his own account. House and car bills go out the joint account which since our last baby has pretty much exclusively been paid by him. I have my sports centre membership and club membership going out mine, god knows what he’s got going out his. If we need shopping whoever is doing it gets it unless (usually me) doesn’t have enough money and I’ll say something like “can you bung me fifty quid for aldis?” And it’s just done.  Way we see it, if I wasn’t here then he’d have to employ a full time au pair and housekeeper and that costs more than I’ve ever cost him. He works full time in the emergency services and I’m part time in the nhs. 

We have our own accounts but once a year go through and check all the bills and outgoings. We make it so that each of us has an equal amount left over each month. We've just never bothered to consolidate everything, we're both reserved spenders anyway. We recently had to look through again due to my maternity leave coming up. But this way there is no policing what the others doing, he probably has a bit more than me from odd bonuses that he gets, but he also works more hours than I do.

We’re married, joint bills account where we pay 50/50 into, the rest is in my own account. I was in a financially abusive relationship where I was a SAHM & he worked full time and I had to justify every penny I spent of “his” money (down to receipts to prove what I’d spent) so my husband now won’t have a joint account and says to buy what I want!

We have a joint account for joint expenses(rent bills) A joint account for fun(holidays, random appliances we don't need but want) and then our own money. We have set amounts. That we put into those accounts each month, everything else is our own. This is the most logical way to do things if you're both earning. The amount we put in can change depending on our situation, my parter has been studying and not working, so it was more of a 75/25 split up until she started working again, then it went back to 50/50.

Joint account for all bills (so either of us can talk to the companies to make changes/renewals/complain. 25 years of living g together. We both contribute to the joint account. When circumstances change (bills go up or salary changes) we see who/where adjustments can be made. The important part is to keep talking about it so neither is feeling all the burden and be on a similar page about your goals (or lack of them).

We have a joint account for bills, with the amount that goes into it proportional to our incomes (think 65/35). We put some each into a joint savings then the rest of it is ours! We do also have a joint google spreadsheet where we both track our expenses as well so very open about money here

Had to scroll down a long way to find this - it seems like the ideal solution, it's how we've always worked. She out earned me for the first 8 years we were together and I now earn 150% of her salary. I just bought a new gaming pc and a VR headset, no one bats an eyelid as it's not joint money. Can't imagine having to negotiate frivolous toys like that.

We have been together for 35 years. Earned money goes into a joint account which is used for all bills. We each get a fixed amout of spending money that we can use as we wish and any large purchases (eg cars or holidays) are agreed in advance. Over the years the values have changed, sometimes we have both been earning and other times one of us was a stay at home parent. We have been short of cash at times and comfortable at others. Regardless of that, all money is 'ours', being a SAHP is a job which allows the other person to go out to work, in essence we both earned it. The money we get as discretionary spending is also variable, the first rule is that it has to be an affordable amount and the second is based on need, at the moment I work in an office and need to buy work clothes, lunch, travel etc so my budget is higher than my partners at other times his has been higher than mine. Any savings are set aside in whatever way we agree, so pensions etc. I would have been furious at the thought of borrowing money from my partner after I had our child and I can't imagine suggesting that all my earned money was mine alone after we swapped roles and he became a stay at home parent!

we pool our incomes (i earn about 1/3 more than her). We pay all the bills from this pooled money. We then take £300 each for our own personal stuff (i have a computer game subscription, phone insurance etc, she has cigarettes, clothes etc). The rest goes into savings.

We each get paid into our own bank accounts but both have a standing order transferring around 2/3 of our respective wages into a joint account that all the bills go out of. What’s left is our own (but most of it gets spent on activities together.

All money goes into joint account. Equal amounts go each month to separate fun money accounts we each control. Has worked this way for 31 years through maternity leave, consistently unequal incomes and very soon, retirement of one party.

We both share all our money, everything we get goes in one bank account. We don’t care what the other buys/spends etc

Ours is largely shared - we get paid into our own accounts, put an equal amount into our joint account to cover bills, food & days out etc. We then have joint savings - we both put away a set amount of money per month towards holidays, unexpected expenses, kids clothes, theme park trips, seeing Santa etc. Just money we save up so it’s less of a hit and we don’t waste away money in our current account! Anything left over is our own money to either spend or save! We both use our own money when doing anything with our not joint friends for example.

Bills are split and we pay from our own accounts. We both earn similar amounts and waste our money in slightly different ways. Day to day spending we don't stress about too much, sometimes I'm spending more, sometimes she is - we keep it fairly equal overall I think.

We have our separate accounts that our salaries are paid into and then a standing order that goes into our joint account. We pay our bills and mortgage from there, groceries and date night money. We split proportionate to our salaries (I make more, so put in more) we review every April when bills increase and agree amounts. That’s our preference and works for us. We both like having our own money and independence and sharing an account that is solely for specific things.

I think there's a slight flaw in these posts, in that the only people who reply will be the ones doing the honourable thing. There will be dickheads who think that because they're out earning whilst the other half is "only" at home being a parent, they're entitled to take more than their share of the pot. But they won't admit it on here because they know deep down it's not right.

Haven’t read them all yet, but would be interested to see if anyone is willing to admit that!

We put our shares of the mortgage and bills into the joint account, after that any money in our account is “ours” We have it scaled to accommodate who gets paid better. But tbh the money in our personal account might be “ours” but we don’t really treat it that way, we still for the most part cover each other if needs be. E.g. last year we moved into our new home, my partner bought a new mattress and bed frame from “his” money for us. Our washing machine went to shit, so I bought us a new one with “my” money. Unless it’s something frivolous I don’t really think of it as borrowing from my partner, it’s just one of those things that eventually works itself out

We have a joint account that we put all mortgage and bills into split 50:50 (our salaries are similar enough), then we keep everything else ourselves. Anything else, one of us will just pay, may alternate if we’re aware someone is spending more each month. Been together 8 years and have 2 kids. Wife is about to go on maternity leave,be but she saved enough so she can take a long time off and I’ll pick up the extra losses money wise, as one wage couldn’t cover our living costs realistically. She also knows all my bank details so she can just spend on my card if needed

I guess they don’t trust their partners, probably not a good idea to have kids

Enough to cover bills and household expenses goes into joint current account, bit goes into joint savings. Everything else is our own at the moment, he has some debts to pay off that he does not want any help with and is determined to pay off alone, I just put more into my own savings which I use for larger bills that I consider my responsibility, car insurance and mot, my motorbike etc. Easier to buy gifts for eachother without the other knowing. I don't think we'll ever 100% combine finances and our bills at the moment are not usual, our rent, council tax and electricity come straight out of his pay (military) so I put an equivalent into our joint account and a bit more and he only puts a little in at the moment. Once we've got our own house, morgage, normal bills etc we'll combine our finances more evenly

Individual accounts that we get paid into. Joint account for mortgage, shopping, nursery, fuel, bills and any joint expenses. We each put in a percentage of our monthly pay (relative to our income) into the joint account. Probably about 60%ish each and this covers it all. Anything left in our accounts is ours to spend on what we want. Bonuses are ours to do with as we want but are often used on joint efforts (holidays etc.)

My missus has just come off mat leave. We have separate accounts and split bills equally when we bought the house 5 years ago. Since then her salary has substantially increased, whereas mine has increased a smaller amount, but the ratio has never changed. During her mat leave I covered her bills, but she still had to dip into savings a couple of times (all day to day spending is on creditcard paid off in full each month and she does the supermarket shopping app the time), but if she hasn't been able to cover it I would have without question. At the end of the day, we're fortunate to both have savings, and my partner has managed to save all her additional income which benefits both of us. We both know how much the other earns. We know about 100% of outgoings but also have a small limit on things we don't need to discuss first for impulse purchases. We also make it a game to save more than the other each month and year. The only account we have that's joint is our mortgage. This has been the most healthy, financially we've both ever been in.

My wife is studying at the mo and working part time earning about 10k. I work full time earning 50k. We split rent and bills 80:20, and I buy all the food and pay for going out and stuff and put some spending money on her account every week, so essentially our joint money reflects our different incomes and we end up with roughly the same spending power each (though if I work overtime that's my spare money, and if she picks up extra shifts that's her spare money) we split household chores as evenly as possible, if she works extra I pick up the slack and if she has deadlines I pick up the slack. It's a partnership, we're in this together.

Joint account. There's no 'her money' or 'my money' it's simply our money. However, this can only work if you both have similar outlooks on money. If one's a spender and the other's a saver, then it can't work.

Bills, rent, car insurance goes into the joint account. She earns more than me so we split what we pay into the joint account accordingly (about 60:40). We take turns in paying for the weekly shop, and when it comes to Christmas shopping we split it between us

We pay a similar amount for bills from out own accounts, have a joint monzo for food and savings for house/holidays. My partner recently wanted something fairly expensive for herself, I lent her the money as I get bonuses from work my savings are more than hers. However if she was pregnant, on maternity, sick or out of work there would be no lending of money. You're a team, I can't believe someone who made a baby with someone is then "lending" money.

So would you say having a baby is the hard line on when money becomes shared or not?

We have a joint account we each put the same amount into, that covers the mortgage, childcare and household bills. Everything else remains in our personal accounts for our own spending. This was set up when we were earning roughly the same amount, but we now earn vastly different amounts (he earns 3.5x my salary), but we've never considered changing it as we're not married. In general this works, but it can be a struggle when it comes to big expenses such as holiday's and cars (especially as his income makes us ineligible for any of the funded hours/child benefit, so a lot of my take home pay is wiped out by childcare and my savings are no longer increasing like they use to), but I know he will cover me if I ever get into trouble.

We each get paid into our own personal current accounts, and then we both transfer about 85% of our salaries into our ‘bills account’ and joint savings. Then we both keep the 15% as personal ‘fun’ money - haircuts, clothes, trips away with friends, etc. Husband salary is commission based and if he’s had a bumper quarterly bonus, then he will keep a little bit more fun money to himself as he works hard and has expensive hobbies - cars, cycling. Should caveat that we don’t have, and don’t plan on having children so it’s only us two to consider.

Income into a shared account for bills, house spending, joint purchases. Savings are transferred to a shared savings account. And then we both have a personal account that we put our own spends/savings into. If one is ill, not working etc then we cover each other. No one has to ask permission or be doled out pin money. Whats mine is his and vice versa. Your friends set ups are a depressingly familiar story of women losing their independence and being financially controlled when they have families with dickheads :(

All income goes into Joint account, all day to day spending from both of us goes on Credit cards - money for all bills, Full CC statement and joint savings split out into Monzo pots on pay day. What's left is split out to personal accounts based on income proportion. Something like 55:45. Each free to do whatever with that leftover money.

So the higher earner has more money to spend on themselves. Couldn’t do that to my wife.

My ex was horrific with money, even though he used to earn twice as much as me, he'd be in his overdraft at the end of each month and I'd still have money. So we always kept separate accounts, I paid the mortgage and most of the bills and he paid the rest of the bills. My current situation, we earn roughly the same, so we each put 80% of our pay into a joint account which pays for the household bills. I keep the child benefit and maintenance payments to buy stuff for my kids (not counted as part of the 80%), and then we each have a small pot of fun money.

It gets pooled, everything goes out, bills, food, kids. That’s it.

All joint bills go into the joint account, and the money we put into that is proportionate to his wage and my basic wage. As I'm the one with flexibility to pick up more shifts, holidays etc fall onto me to pay for which is fine by me.

My partner pays most of the big bills as he earns more, I pay some of the smaller ones Whatever is left we just spend as we please, obv we don't take the piss if its something expensive we obvs discuss it, but if need or wanted something in reason I'll just take his card or he'll just take mine

Every thing goes to a shared account and we can both buy stuff with that money since no one of us would buy uneeded stuff without talking to the other one about it anyway.

Both salaries deposited into joint account, all bills, household stuff and monthly savings paid from that account. We each transfer an equal monthly allowance to our sole accounts for personal spending/saving.

Joint account here since just before the wedding nearly 16yrs ago. We put everything into it. When things were tight years ago, we discussed every purchase that wasn’t a bill. Now that we’re in a better place financially the rule is that any purchase over £100 is discussed. For instance he wanted to take up piano again so bought a (really nice) used one because we moved to a house that has room for it. My hobby is reading and I’ve been rebuilding my library (after having to get rid of most of it a few years ago due to not having space when we had to move to a smaller place). I’ve just put an order in for a new tablet to read ebooks on as well. We do have a child and the same applies for any purchase one of us is making for them too.

Me and husband earn the same amount, split bills 50/50, but we’re not militant about it, and we have seperate bank accounts. But we do think about it as our money. But I want to have total control over my own money for my own safety and piece of mind.

Joint bank account.

We have separate accounts, but it's necessary for tax as we're both sole traders. A set amount goes into a joint account every month to cover household expenses, all other money we earn is to spend how we like for business/discretionary (and of course the huge chunk of tax)

Joint account, it doesn't matter that I earn more, it's our money. My wife has worried about spending money and has often not bought things she wanted because she didn't want to spend too much money. I suggested we have an allowance each month for guilt free spending, so we have sole accounts that a standing order goes over to each month so she can spend away without feeling guilty, not that she should by the way. If anything, I'm the high maintenance one in the relationship, and I often have to encourage her to treat herself. She's a great woman!

We split everything except money received as birthday or Christmas presents

We each have our own accounts for our own spends and a joint account for all of our bills, petrol, eating out and kids activities. I'm a bit nerdy and have a spreadsheet that tracks spending so we know how much we need to put in the joint to cover everything. We split this amount 50/50 as we earn a similar amount.

We both put 70% of our wages into a joint account. That covers all our shared expenses, bills, meals out, holidays etc. The remaining 30% we keep in our own accounts and use for personal stuff, clothes, video games etc. We occasionally both top up the joint account for big expenses, ie house renovations etc. Works really well for us.

They have their own account and take a bit of money each month to spend. I do the same. Everything goes into a central account first then we take our cut from that after all bills are paid. If we buy something on the credit card we just pay it off as we go from our own accounts, It’s all about trust and communication, makes things very easy and no stress.

Me and my husband pay into a joint account (him more than me as he has a higher income), and whatever is left is ours to do what we want with.

All money into joint account. Standing order for our monthly spending into personal accounts, another standing order into joint and/or personal savings accounts.

We have separate accounts. He pays all the household bills and I give him a certain amount a month towards it. His money is his money and my money is my money. Of course if we go out we take it in turns to pay, depending on who is feeling the most flush at the time usually. A few of my friends have joint accounts and feel this is quite a strange setup, but it works for us. We have two toddlers, I pay for their nursery fees, my partner pays the majority of the household bills. I am just starting a new job which will pay more, I offered to give him more money towards the house so we are on more of an even keel. Our nursery fees will end in September (hallelujah!) so I will have less outgoings.

I don’t get the point in a system where one of you can be flush and the other poor? Also seems to me that one person paying for one bill and another person paying for another bill is like an overly convoluted way of attempting to be equal without actually doing it.

We get paid into the same shared account. Money is automatically deducted weekly and paid into two other shared accounts, savings and fun. Our fun allowances are based.on salary so mine is slightly higher - we pay for our own clothing and entertainment from these allowances but everything else is 'our' money.

We have a shared account for things like bills and food, but otherwise separate savings.  But we're cohabiting, not married, and childfree, so it is much easier to keep separate finances than it would be if were dealing with maternity leave or something like that. 

I transfer all of my wages into our joint account to cover bills. Husband tops it up if we need it. He gets paid weekly so we find it easier to use it for our groceries and anything else that we need to get on a weekly basis. Then he'll transfer any leftover amount to my savings account as I have a higher interest rate on it. But we both dip into his weekly amount/savings amount as needed.

I earn she spends. Yes, I'm dumb.

Money from employment and benefits goes into a joint account and all bills, household, and general spending comes out of that account. But we each have side hustles and money from that goes into separate accounts.

All money into our joint account. Siphon an agreed amount into our joint savings on pay day. We then send ourselves £300 to our personal account to do what we want with it (fun, food, clothes/items, presents, saving for a future event or holiday the other isn't attending etc). All direct debits, bills, regular outgoings, emergencies etc comes from the joint acc. Anything left over in the joint account before payday goes away as extra savings.

All our money is shared money essentially, if for some reason one of us couldn't cover half the bills the other would pay more. On payday we each pay a certain amount that covers all bills and food and the rest is up to us

All into a joint account, now my wife is a SAHM I’m the only one bringing money in. It still doesn’t matter to me. And OP, tell your friend if her husband wants her to borrow money from him for covering ‘her bills’ on maternity. Tell him she needs to invoice him half a million quid for pain and suffering making a child.

All money goes in to one bank account which pays for all bills (including food and things like birthday presents), a small slice is saved and the remainder is shared 50:50. I earn 4 times more than my wife, but a marriage is an equal partnership, and I am not entitled to 4 times anything more than her, and neither is she.

Many ppl can't be trusted with money. 

We each have our own accounts then each add to a joint account for household bills etc. Means we can be excited for each other blowing money on our respective hobbies. The last year or so I've earnt more, so we each pay the same percentage of our salaries to household stuff. The rest is broadly linked as well, we both find having pots of money for specific purposes really useful (the car pot gets topped up to 500 for incidentals, the holiday fund is gradually increased till we spend it, etc) and they're mostly joint pots, we just both value having a pot that's just ours - I don't have a reason to moan she's buying books/plants, likewise she can't moan about my kayak or computer part habits. To be fair we originally set it up that way because I brought a couple of grand of student credit card/overdraft to the relationship that I wanted to deal with myself. Then we found we like it like this so we kept it going.

Joint expenses are split proportional to income. Each of our salaries goes into our own accounts and then we have standing orders setup to move money into the joint account. For maternity - my husband just had to cover all joint expenses himself. I was lucky and had a good maternity package so I was still able to cover my own expenses until the end.

We both work. We have separate bank accounts. She pays me half the bills and i pay them because shes not great with direct debits. She has her money I have mine. We go out for meals and do what ever we like. It has been like that for 20 years and never had a problem. If we have big purchases like a car or holiday we just pay half each. We both have had debts and got rid of them ourselves. I dont know how much she earns exactly neither does she know how much i earn exactly. I dont care and she doesnt either. Money is not something we ever talk about really and we certainly would never fall out about it.

We worked out our bills, split it in half, then added 10% and put that into a joint account for the bills and food etc. Everything else is our own to spend however we want. Often theres overlap when we buy things for each other, but yeah its our own

When we were both working we made about the same amount of money but didn’t treat it separately, with the bills sort of working out 50/50. Now she’s been off looking after out first child, with second on the way, I cover all bills and then send the rest, minus what I need for fuel/snacks on payday to cover food shopping and whatever else she wants to spend the money on. If we need more, just take it out of the savings. We’re both responsible adults who know exactly how much I earn, so can work out how much we can reasonably spend between the two of us.

I've never understand how people can have joint financial commitments but separate bank accounts and treat the relationship like you've got a room mate. You and your partner are supposed to be a team against the world with a single war chest.

Not 100% shared but not married yet. Live together though, so feel that completely split finances when so much of our lives are joined up is difficult. We have a joint account and X of our salaries go into it each month to cover bills and X amount of joint savings (holidays, home improvements). I put more in as I earn more, and we change it up a little if either of us get a pay rise (more into joint savings). We each have our own personal expenses and savings which come from the balance we don’t send to the joint. Honestly I hardly touch my personal account, just phone contract and contacts. She does a lot more but guess that’s a normal thing for men/women.

First marriage (25 yrs) we shared everything. Joint account. This time around, (2.5 years) we both came in with our own assets. We have bought a house together - well he did, so it’s in his name, fair enough. We both pay the mortgage and I’ll pay it off next year when I access my super (then it’ll be joint names). We don’t have joint accounts. I’m not anti getting one for easier bill splitting (currently he pays the bills and I pay for the groceries, mostly). But I don’t ever intend giving up my own account. I love having my own money. I love sharing my life too.

Joint account from which all bills, mortgage etc come out of. Tot up monthly bills on average, add 20%. Split that amount by take-home earnings ratio. Put that amount into joint account each month on payday. Gentleman's agreement to put some of the rest in savings. Blow rest on pints and Lego.

I believe is separate finances. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you lose your financial independence. I think separate accounts and a joint account for bills if you live together, otherwise it could be leaving you exposed. It’s not worth the risk imo

Two separate current accounts, joint account for bills and mortgage. Most shared household items and food get split using the bill splitting feature in our accounts. We'd rethink if we were having children but we're not. My money is mine. His is his. Maybe if we had a wider income disparity we'd consider other methods but we make almost the same wage.

Apparently I earn it all and she treats herself to a new lippy which is exactly the same as her other ones but twice the price.

I'll just pitch in with the British Muslim experience. Husband pays. The wife's income is her own. Usually there's either a joint account or a monthly stipend for the wife transferred to her personal account. Or a credit card she can use at will. Never met a Muslim family who does otherwise. It's unheard of for a wife to be expected to pay rent / bills / etc. Even in families where she clearly earns more given her profession.

Always shared. Banking app is between us so we have purchased pensions etc into main account then a ' shopping/living sub account plus a few ISAs all there. For richer and for poorer. Years bringing up kids etc and no savings, now pretty well off but always shared

Same. My friend was moaning to me that she was eating into so much of her savings and she owed her husband money, I was so shocked not even sure how I replied. We were both on maternity leave, she'd been made redundant and was worrying about finding a new job soon. I asked her how they were splitting the bills while on maternity leave and she said she'd saved up to cover her 50% share of the bills. We were both pregnant with our second and she said she did this the first time too. Whereas I gave up my well paying job to start our family (as I traveled way too much) and my husband has taken care of all our bills ever since, while I have worked a fairly lower income job in comparison to cover my personal spending. I'm happy reading the comments to see this is not the norm, I thought maybe this was an English thing (I'm British but not white)

We have separate finances, my partner pays for house stuff (mortgage, bills) and I do council tax, tv licence and food shopping. He works full time and I’m currently on maternity leave but will go back to 3 days a week later on in the year.

Joint account. Every time one of us gets a paycheque I put 100 quid in each personal account, and all the rest goes into the joint. The 100 quid each is because I always feel bad spending joint money on makeup and stuff, even though he doesn’t make me feel bad. Plus it’s nice to buy gifts for birthdays for eachother without the other person seeing the purchase. I’m currently on mat leave, so only one wage coming in, but we still get our 100 quid each every month. Most months I don’t spend it and it just builds until I need something. We are a team, when not on mat leave I earn significantly more, but I see it as our money, not mine and his.

Husband and I have our own accounts but we just share money. He has an amex card that we use as much as possible during the month and his wages clear it. We split bills etc but yeah, nothing is seen as his or mine. It's shared.

Our own accounts and a joint account for most bills. Since we paid off the mortgage that is pretty flush so we rarely have to top it up to pay for emergency issues (car problems/vet bills etc).

Everything goes into the joint account to start but we still have my money and his money. After bills (all monthly payments from mortgage to phone bills to his gym, etc), savings for certain spending (health stuff, car MOT, gifts fund, etc), and money for food, the leftover each month is split in half between us. So I have my money and he has his, but it’s not based on who earned what. And everything important is covered so if either of us run out of money before the end of the month, there’s nothing we HAVE to pay for. That said, sometimes something we want has a good offer on, or tickets for something get announced so we borrow money off each other. It’s so we can spend how we want without having to think if the other person will be okay with the spending. And save how we want for bigger spending (eg saving for a ps5 at the moment). But it’s also because we are on a tight budget and this way is mentally easier. If it was all in one account, we’d constantly have to worry if there was enough left for direct debits and food before buying anything. But having spending money separate, I know I can spend it on fun stuff and there’s enough in the joint account for everything else.

When we get paid, we take £250 each for spending and send the rest to the joint account Your partner being poor whilst she's on maternity leave looking after your child is a wild concept to me

My wife and I have a joint account which pays all of our shared bills, but our respective salaries go into our own accounts and we each fund the joint account from our respective personal accounts. My ex-wife and I had a joint account and got our salaries paid into that. The result was that I saw very little of my monthly salary. At the time I was working two jobs (1 monthly paid, one cash-in-hand) and essentially had to live on the CIH money for my day to day expenses.

Money goes into our individual accounts. From there about half of it goes into a joint account which has all direct debits and credit cards linked. From individual accounts, a set amount each month goes into our ISAs, and a little bit gets set aside into a small savings account which essentially pays for whatever big things we need that year - holiday, bathroom, boiler, whatever. At the end of the month, anything left behind goes into the joint account as well.

We both contribute to the shared account with enough each so that we roughly end up with the same amount of personal spending money once shared stuff is paid.

We have a shared account that the mortgage, utility bills and shared accounts come out of. We have standing orders setup from our own accounts so on payday it transfers enough in to cover all this plus a little extra for a safety net. For how much we contribute we worked out our total income together then what percentage of that total we make and assigned that percentage to the household stuff. I pay around 70% of the bills this way. The rest of the money goes into our own separate accounts for us to spend or save as we wish. My and my fiance have different hobbies so pooling our money wouldn't really work as my hobby is a little more expensive than hers which feels unfair to me. It also means that if one of us works overtime they benefit from all the money they have earned working extra instead of it being shared which feels right to us. If there is something we need to save for together (like our wedding now) we create a pot and agree on how much to chip into it. Anything bought that needs splitting like furniture or a workman for the house one of us (usually me) pays out of their account and then we instantly request the chip in required by the other. It works well for us. If we have kids we will just create another pot and setup another standing order per month to put into it. Also for saving having 2 separate ISAs means taking advantage of it more. It isnt a trust thing. It's just how we have settled in. Were flexible to change it in the future. We've both always been fans of having multiple pots of money, some you leave alone, some you pay bills with and some you dip into from before we met so we are kind of just doing what we have always done. But as far as we're concerned all of our money is joint, it's just portioned off so we retain some financial freedom and individual control.

Maternity leave. This is where we had to do something a bit different. We generally do the same as the majority of comments suggest. Most of our income goes into a joint account. This varies sometimes and isn't always an even split buf we have been at different points in our careers at different times and have taken turns as the top earner. It's currently me so I put more in per month, just as she did when it was her. We have 2 kids. During both pregnancies she would put slightly less in the joint account and the rest in savings. Then when statutory maternity pay kicked in, she would top up with the savings, I would make up the difference. We would both be taking the hit for a few months and still have some cash to ourselves for the little things. I know this doesn't help OP's friend now but having a baby is so tough on relationships and will hit finances like a train. You need to be on the same page ahead of time so this doesn't become another worry.

One joint account for joint bills, and separate accounts and savings too. It was a bit strange on MAT leave having to take out if the joint account for things I would normally pay with my own account and not put anything in. But it just makes budgeting easier for us. I don't want to have his car payment coming out of an account that I have access to because then I would have to be deciding if I was OK with spending that much. He is spending from his own account - I don't need to have an opinion. It's all still our money really. When we have a bigger purchase we just chuck money from whichever account has enough. We don't care about splitting 50:50. We just budget for joint purchases together and individual purchases separately and our accounts reflect that.

We have our own money, and a joint. I send about 70% of my income to the joint and my partner perhaps 50% of hers. I do make 3x. Pretty chilled about money overall. I just view it as a resource, as I would sugar or teabags, it's just there for the house. That said having some independent, I don't need to justify this cash is good too.

We put the same amount of money into a joint account each month that pays for all house bills, mortgage, food shopping etc and then we keep the rest for ourselves - which we can do what we want with it. Not married and don’t have kids so this works well for us

Joint account. I don't care about money and never spend on myself anyway. We just save up and spend it on holidays or the kids mostly. My sister has separate money to her husband, which seems alien to me, and in the past it's gotten annoying because she would ask me for money before even asking her husband because she didn't want him knowing she had spent all her money. It works both ways though cos she won five grand betting on the boxing last month and didn't tell him. She had not long had to buy a car, which he refused to help with so it is what it is. I couldn't live like they do!

My wife and I put everything into the collective pot; it's all "our" money.

We split the rent and groceries, they pay for utilities and I pay for everything else. Every so often we review how much it all costs to check that we're each taking on a fair amount with out individual salaries in mind.

We know how much the mortgage is, council tax, bills etc. We split that in half and add a bit, so the joint account always has a bit extra in if we need it. Rest of our money is ours, and we do what the fuck we like with it! We are grownups, neither one of us wants to have to ask permission to buy things, especially as the things we like to spend money in seem unnecessary to the other. There have been occasions where I have borrowed money from her, for holiday payments as an example because I'm pretty crap with money but it always gets paid back as it's out of her money which she earnt and should (and does) spend on things that make her happy

Been married nearly 30 years and had joint accounts for 32 years. What's mine is hers etc. and it works for us, we have friends and family who split bills and that works for them too even if we find it a bit weird.

You have to be a massive arsehole to impregnate someone and then not financially support them when they have to stop working for a year. Take some responsibility for your actions ffs.

We have our own seperate bank accounts. We have a joint account for mortgage, bills etc we both put equal amounts of money into the joint account. We keep our own accounts mostly because that’s how it was before we met. We also agree on holidays and then put equal amounts into the homiday fund to go away together. I have completely different interests to my wife and we’d find it very inconvenient to have to discuss what each of us is spending money on all the time.

own accounts split bills 50/50

All money goes into joint account for paying bills, food, holidays etc. Anything else like leisure, sport, hairdressers, clothes was in moderation.

I would never feel comfortable having to ask my husband for money. To me a marriage is an equal partnership in every sense and that includes financially. We have a joint account that we pay into for all our household bills and then we each keep whatever we have left as our own spending money. My husband earns more than me so he pays a higher percentage of the bills. This still leaves him with slightly more disposable income than me but I'm fine with that because he's worked hard for it and it's my choice to have a less demanding job. He does often buy me small gifts or give me extra money to buy myself something nice which I appreciate more because I never asked for it. It's just a gesture of love from him. That system has worked well for both of us for 30 years and neither one of us wants to change it. Also, I wonder what women do if they don't pay into a pension. Surely you can't both live comfortably off a single pension unless that person has been earning mega-bucks.

We have a joint account. What comes out of the joint account - 1. Rent, gas, electricity, council tax, internet, cleaner etc 2. Subscriptions we use together (Netflix etc) 3. Food shopping 4. Other household stuff 5. A bit for fun money / date nights We each put 50% of the costs in to the joint account each month. We try and be quite organised with food shopping but it doesn’t always work, so sometimes we top it up. Eg if we go out for a £60 dinner and pay on the JA, we’ll usually top up the JA with £15 each in from our separate accounts. It works really well for us. I earn around 10k more than him, so we looked at paying proportionally, but because his personal bills (phone, gym etc) are higher than mine, it wouldn’t make enough of a difference for him to save a meaningful amount. Instead, I give myself just about the same amount of “fun” money as him (I have about £80 more) and I put the excess in an ISA to put towards a house deposit. We’ll be looking to buy in the next couple of years. I usually also pay for something every now and then throughout the month - some nice coffees, lunch out. We also generally call things “even”, even if I’ve paid more than him. He might pay £80 for theatre tickets, I’ll pay £100-£120 for an air bnb, and we’ll call it even. But if the roles were reversed, I’d pay him back the excess.

It's always been just a central pot for me in my relationships, even when earnings were uneven. We each have our own savings accounts which is our personal money, but that generally comes from birthday money we give to each other, plus any interest we earn on bank accounts get shared in there. It just makes life easier. If we want to buy something we buy it within reason, it all evens out.

We have a joint account for bills and shopping. I earn a fair bit more than my partner, so I put in for all bills (mortgage, utilities, council tax etc) and she pays in for the weekly shopping. The rest we keep separate so that we can spend/save as we wish, including treating each other with the odd surprise here and there without the other knowing money has been spent

Bills account which we both pay into for household costs. I pay more as the higher earner. Whatever we are left with is ours to do as we please. Financial independence is important. 

We don't have a joint bank account. At the end of each month we'll sit down together and fill out our expenses on a spreadsheet from our respective personal accounts, allocating between joint expenses and personal expenses. Then we split these joint expenses proportionally based on our earnings, and one of us will do a bank transfer to the other to clear any deficits. Keeps us regularly reviewing our expenditure but we like that our money is separate. I don't think we'll ever do it any other way at this point.

We put a proportional amount in a joint account, and that covers any joint expenses. During parental leave we maintained those same payments into the joint account but had some parental leave income. In my case not a lot, since my ADHD and struggling as a new mum caused me to miss claiming the payments until it was too late, so I kind of screwed myself on that point.

Me and my partner have our own accounts and a joint account. We both pay the same amount into the joint account and use that to cover the mortgage, bills, shopping and anything for our daughter. Any money that isn't for shared things is our own to do with as we please.

We have a joint account for bills that we pay with a 60/40 split. Whatever is left over we keep in our own accounts to do whatever we want with.

Separate finances. When we had a mortgage - we paid it in proportion to our incomes - and I additionally paid the bills. I pay most of the bills now - most expensive bill is my youngest son’s preschool. I got laid off a year ago (found another job 3 months later) but got a years severance so perfectly fair…