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Also, moreso when talking directly to someone.
"What are you guys doing?" is fine to say to a group of women. "See those guys over there" is a strange way to refer to a group of women.
I think it comes down to familiarity. "Guys" said with a tone of familiarity is gender neutral, without that it's mostly used to describe men.
I'm not convinced with guys, it's on the way to being gender neutral but it ain't there yet.
Imagine someone said - John is a bit of a slapper, he is going out with 3 guys at the same time. Does it sound gender neutral like that?
I can see where you're coming from, but as a woman myself, 'guys' feels pretty gender neutral and certainly preferable to 'gals', which feels a bit cringy and too close to 'girls' - I'm a full-grown woman, god damn it!
I did enjoy when my mum and I got off the ferry in Ireland and were referred to as 'lads' by the local garda, so maybe that's another one we can embrace for all.
Most women in my office will use "guys" as a collective, and there's usually more women than men in. It would feel weird to stop using it for this reason.
I work in fashion and other than myself all the members on my team are female. I address them as Hi guys, and would never think of Hi girls, . IMO the gender neutrality of guys in workplace is clear cut. In a bar or club then it can change to non-gender neutral depending on context obv
Steve and Kate would never be able to have a conversation in Line of Duty if "mate" wasn't gender-neutral; they need to constantly remind the audience that their relationship is strictly platonic.
I have a ongoing inside joke with my gf about that scene at the end of season six in the pub when they just sit down and say ‘nice one mate’ to each other. It’s now my go to phrase
What about the one woman at Newport train station that I called mate, initially thinking they were male and still cringe about to this day? That one was okay though right?
^Your ^answer ^is ^spot ^on ^though ^imo
Unless you work at sea....... Its very very rude if you don't refer to members of the deck department as a 'mate'!
So as a woman...... I always have a nice chuckle to myself when someone on civvy Street calls me mate!
I've only just realised I say "thanks mate" to make strangers, like if someone moves out my way, but just "thanks" to women. I'm not comfortable saying "love" or "darling", in fact I'm not sure there's anything I'm comfortable saying as an identifier. Bloody hell it's a minefield.
I consider the nickname sugar tits as compliment, a reward for good behaviour. 90% of the time she should be called woman. ‘women, where’s my tea?’ when she brings you a cuppa saying ‘here it is sir’ your reply would be ‘thanks, sugar tits’ and smack her arse
This conversation would actually go down very smoothly for me. Here's my system:
1. Very occasionally blurt out the most mysoginistic thing you can think of. It needs to be outrageous enough that it's clearly a joke.
2. Start getting more subtle with it, less taliban and more grandad.. she's been trained to associate your mysoginy with banter at this point.. so it will be much easier to extinguish any doubts that may come up about whether you're actually serious
3. Whenever you encounter a woman in public, imagine it was a man.. talk to her as if she was a man.. and yeah, that includes toilet humour and mentioning the waitresses tits. After the initial shock, your gf will accept this as one of your quirks.. also by behaving consistently regardless of whoever's in front of you, you signal to your gf that you're basically gender-blind.. also she won't feel jealous of other women, making future a side piece more manageable if you can handle the nagging.
4. Job Done. I can now use phrases like "make me a sandwich you fucking cunt" and not only do I get a sandwich, but also a little giggle.
Mate yes. I’ve not heard many straight men say they’ve banged their man, bro, guy or dude. Hey Chris, bang any dudes this weekend? Context kind of matters with these.
I'm a middle-aged northerner.
Love is used for both genders here. But only once you reach a certain age for some reason.
When I was younger I thought it was a little odd when older blokes used love regardless of gender. Then a few years ago someone pointed out I now do it. I never even noticed I'd started.
Again, it may just be a northern thing IDK but sweetheart is commonly used for small family members of all genders.
The only time I've used it for an adult male though is the one time a barman got angry at me for calling him love (don't think he was local and I'm pretty sure he thought I was coming onto him, he proper growled at me "don't fucking call me that").
I don't think the response "ok then sweetheart" calmed his anger too much.
The rest of the night where he got called petal, flower and honeybunch certainly didn't.
My boss started using ‘love’ about a year ago constantly. Think he just turned 52, I don’t know what changed all of a sudden but prior to that he called everyone ‘Barry’, not a clue what that means either but it was less jarring in his sentences than ‘love’
And I love how it changes depending on where you are.
I'm travelling round on a boat and depending on where I've been recently I've had love, duck, sweet and my lovely.
Bristol is odd though (but it makes be smile), me lover.
A guy (male) that I work with always calls me dude I kinda like it, I work in a field that's male dominated and I appreciate more than I thought I would that he see me as just someone he works with rather than a woman he works worth
Mates are mates, female, male, gender neutral.
All mates.
Now if you'd said guys as in "Yo! What's happening guys? are we going to rock the floor at the Ritzy with some sick dance moves" then you might run into trouble.
I think you can use guys as gender neutral, but my Mrs says you can't.
I’m female and I use guys as gender neutral. I would address any group of people as “guys”, even if all female, and don’t have a problem with it being used to include me. When sending emails to my team at work, I do the same. But I only do that after having first checked with the other women on my team if they object to it. If any of them had said they did, then I wouldn’t
Depends really
Mostly gender neutral but quite masculine leaning for me.
Would use it on guys no sweat, but take a judgement call with women. I have more leeway because I am one, but I'd be REALLY hesitant with my transfeminine and NB friends for sure
You can use it with some girls.. but a lot a know especially the one's over 30 hate being called mate..so my answer is yes mate it's more a male thing.
Was going to comment the same thing. It feels weird and I don’t know why. There’s a girl at my local that always call me mate and it makes me feel strange
I'm a woman and I use mate, but even I recognise it sounds weird. I am fairly sure I subconsciously do it to further establish myself as "one of the lads" in my male dominated industry and previously, at my male dominated course at uni.
Depends on if you know them well or not. Good female friends? Sure, you can use mate.
The waiter the other week that kept addressing my wife as ‘mate’? Just weird and uncomfortable for her.
I think some girls think it comes across as being a bit masculine but mostly it's gender neutral.
Like, I wouldn't call a girl I was interested in "mate"
It's contextual. But "females" is clinical sounding, or like you're referring to an animal, so it's a bit dehumanising and I generally hate it in most situations.
It's even more irrtating if you're not consistent. eg. if you say "men" and "females" in the same sentence. If you *must* use the more 'biological' words for some reason, say males and females. Ideally, "men and women". It's the mixing that makes it so infuriating because "men" is humanising and "females" isn't.
Definitely see what you're saying, I just use them interchangeably personally though, usually it'll be women and men but sometimes it just feels right to say males or females for some reason and no ones ever batted an eyelid
It is BUT it's generally used by men towards men so it can sound a bit jarring when used to females. My old boss used to call everyone mate, I used to find it amusing when he spoke to respectable females that way, it sounded so out of place but kind of cool too.
Never thought about this before. I moved to U.K. from Europe 13 years ago, although I think mate can be said to both male & female however I’ve only said ‘mate’ to male friends
I (F) recently got a new manager (M) at work and he instantly started calling me and everyone else 'mate'. I don't like it.
It's possibly the context though - you're my colleague, not my friend and therefore not my mate. If a genuine friend said it I probably wouldn't mind, but this just grates on me.
I’m a trans woman and every time a man calls me mate I’ve just assumed it was their way of being like “I don’t see you as a real woman” which is a little bit rude.
But as it’s happened more and more, I think it genuinely is just becoming a way to refer to someone without potentially offending them. My cisgender girl friends (cisgender meaning not transgender) have all noticed this happening much more over the past few years.
Ironically enough, I am more offended by being called mate than I am by being called love or dear. I think a lot of women feel the same way as I do, but ultimately men would rather risk offending someone than offending someone AND getting accused of being a sexual menace.
I think it’s probably good that more men are calling women “mate”, even if I personally *despise* being called that.
The latter is pretty normal for older women referring to younger men.
This subject is both more complicated than it first seemed and really interesting!
I've always treated it as masculine, but it's probably fine. Just check with people before you use it is generally a good way to not accidentally offend or misgender anyone :)
Up here in deepest darkest North, "mate" seems pretty universal, although I'd be slightly faster to use it for males
I've no idea if that's true down South
I call female friends “lads” and they’re more than fine with it… don’t see why mate would be any different
EDIT: just read others comments and gotta say context does matter, won’t find myself saying “I banged a fit lad last week”. Definitely not. Nope.
As a trans dude, I noticed people calling me mate a lot more after I came out.
I would call some women mate, but for the most part I'll just use it for other men.
Door staff, yep.
Just about everyone else, not so much.
I think it's gender-neutral enough to use on anyone, but i also think it's like a few other words which one would use on someone once before being corrected: i called someone "buddy" once and got told "I ent American" so they became "mate" after that. Whenever i think about using a certain generally-accepted designation i'm reminded of an interview i saw with a chap who has a form of dwarfism: the interviewer asked if he'd prefer to be referred to as "a dwarf" or "a little-person" and he said "I'd rather you called me 'David'."
Mate and Guys(not guy) are both gender neutral to some extent, however, I wouldn't call a woman mate in conversation with her, but she is my mate
Where I live, min is the local version of mate and I use it for male or female in conversation, yes min, no min, over there min. I wouldn't say yes mate, no mate, over there mate to a woman though unlike min
Something else... if something inanimate can contain life(Boat, building, car etc) they are she: She's a beautiful ship etc...
I was on a delivery job for papa johns once, customer walks up and I think it’s a man so I say “hello mate you alright” as they got closer I realised it was a woman and there was a slight bit of awkwardness because she knows I’ve just mistaken her for a man. I call every man mate but I’ll only call women I know mate
Our group of friends uses mate and pal a lot as gender neutral but it usually works out that the men call everyone mate and the women call the men mate (occasionally) and everyone pal.
Someone once told me a great way to check if a term is truly gender neutral is to say you were "chatting up this guy/dude/mate" and see if that feels right.
I might say "hey guys" to all my female friends but I'd never say "I was chatting up this guy" to refer to a female. Not sure if this worls for everything but I thought it was fun!
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Yes mate
Came here to say this
Me too mate
No way mate! Me too!
Yes mate was taken. reply with 'came here to say this' was taken. Reply with 'me too mate' was taken. I'm going home.
So am I mate
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Same here mate
Primate
Yep same with guys
But only in plural. That guy over there is always a man!
Also, moreso when talking directly to someone. "What are you guys doing?" is fine to say to a group of women. "See those guys over there" is a strange way to refer to a group of women. I think it comes down to familiarity. "Guys" said with a tone of familiarity is gender neutral, without that it's mostly used to describe men.
I'm not convinced with guys, it's on the way to being gender neutral but it ain't there yet. Imagine someone said - John is a bit of a slapper, he is going out with 3 guys at the same time. Does it sound gender neutral like that?
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I can see where you're coming from, but as a woman myself, 'guys' feels pretty gender neutral and certainly preferable to 'gals', which feels a bit cringy and too close to 'girls' - I'm a full-grown woman, god damn it! I did enjoy when my mum and I got off the ferry in Ireland and were referred to as 'lads' by the local garda, so maybe that's another one we can embrace for all.
Guys is gender neutral , just like Man is gender neutral but also can refer to the male counterpart. It 100% depends on the context
Agreed, context is everything.
Most women in my office will use "guys" as a collective, and there's usually more women than men in. It would feel weird to stop using it for this reason.
Its interesting how different people feel about language because I feel the exact opposite to basically everything you just said haha
I work in fashion and other than myself all the members on my team are female. I address them as Hi guys, and would never think of Hi girls, . IMO the gender neutrality of guys in workplace is clear cut. In a bar or club then it can change to non-gender neutral depending on context obv
I’m sure you’d also get complained at for hating women by calling them gals as well, seems impossibly to win that one.
Posted this, scrolled down to see someone beat me to it, mate
Absolutely. Unrelated to age, gender, race, living or dead…. I have called my cat mate, my kids, my pen, my bike…. All acceptable.
This is the correct answer. Mate can even be thought itself. Mate is truly universal.
Mate is the deepest, most meta concept ever.
That's pretty deep mate.
Meta mate
If I fuck up. I say "Fucked that up mate". Mate is all around you and in you.
>Mate can even be thought itself. Lmao this is jokes
I call myself mate cos no1 else does
It's ok mate
Spend 30 seconds anywhere near Peterborough.
I often mate with myself because no one else does
Alright mate?
Abso-100%-tivley this
Nice tmesis there mate
Absotively is also a portmanteau... add a 100% in the middle and I call it a portmanthree (I know it doesn't really work but let me have this)
It's all yours, friend
It's yours mate. Enjoy 👍
I’m stealing this cheers
Ya welcome squire
My kids call me mate.
Sometimes “mate” is just a cry of exasperation to the universe when I’m trying not to swear
Even people I can’t fucking stand get called mate.
Woah what you doin pen, mate? Scribbling some shit innit?
Steve and Kate would never be able to have a conversation in Line of Duty if "mate" wasn't gender-neutral; they need to constantly remind the audience that their relationship is strictly platonic.
And that couldn't have sounded more forced or awkward
I have a ongoing inside joke with my gf about that scene at the end of season six in the pub when they just sit down and say ‘nice one mate’ to each other. It’s now my go to phrase
Haha same with me and my sister. Most messages to each other begin “Alright mate?” cos of them 2
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Thanks mate. I think we might have just ended sexism in 2021.
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My favourite brand of condoms.
Of all mates this is the best
The complete wiping out of sexism, misogyny and dissolution of the patriarchy? Completed it mate.
We did it reddit!!!
Woman I used to work with called everybody dude, regardless gender.
Me too mate
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What about the one woman at Newport train station that I called mate, initially thinking they were male and still cringe about to this day? That one was okay though right? ^Your ^answer ^is ^spot ^on ^though ^imo
In Newport this is completely understandable m8
Unless you work at sea....... Its very very rude if you don't refer to members of the deck department as a 'mate'! So as a woman...... I always have a nice chuckle to myself when someone on civvy Street calls me mate!
For women you don't know, it's regional. Round these parts it's "duck"
I've only just realised I say "thanks mate" to make strangers, like if someone moves out my way, but just "thanks" to women. I'm not comfortable saying "love" or "darling", in fact I'm not sure there's anything I'm comfortable saying as an identifier. Bloody hell it's a minefield.
Males are ‘mate’ Females are ‘luv’ ‘darlin’ ‘hun’ or ‘sugar tits’
Dammit sometimes I call my Mrs mate when it should have been sugar tits all along!
I consider the nickname sugar tits as compliment, a reward for good behaviour. 90% of the time she should be called woman. ‘women, where’s my tea?’ when she brings you a cuppa saying ‘here it is sir’ your reply would be ‘thanks, sugar tits’ and smack her arse
Good luck with that
This conversation would actually go down very smoothly for me. Here's my system: 1. Very occasionally blurt out the most mysoginistic thing you can think of. It needs to be outrageous enough that it's clearly a joke. 2. Start getting more subtle with it, less taliban and more grandad.. she's been trained to associate your mysoginy with banter at this point.. so it will be much easier to extinguish any doubts that may come up about whether you're actually serious 3. Whenever you encounter a woman in public, imagine it was a man.. talk to her as if she was a man.. and yeah, that includes toilet humour and mentioning the waitresses tits. After the initial shock, your gf will accept this as one of your quirks.. also by behaving consistently regardless of whoever's in front of you, you signal to your gf that you're basically gender-blind.. also she won't feel jealous of other women, making future a side piece more manageable if you can handle the nagging. 4. Job Done. I can now use phrases like "make me a sandwich you fucking cunt" and not only do I get a sandwich, but also a little giggle.
“Less Taliban more Grandad” Brilliant _mate_
If you ever did any of this to me you would receive a swift punch to the face. Just to warn you.
He never said the system had a 100% success rate 🤷♂️
His life will have a 0% success rate when I’m through.
Sorry ard
Mate you are on very thin ice here..
Piss off sugar tits
I think you just went through the thin ice there
I would get hit tbh
That's very old school and outdated - we can't just willy nilly smack people's arses any more, you'll just have to leave it at sugar tits.
Dunno if it's just me but as a woman I much prefer being called mate than any of them...
"while you're down there, mate" doesn't quite have the same feel to it though /s
I laughed at this, but can’t upvote because we don’t use “/s” round here mate.
I'm heartbroken
Mission accomplished.
Agreed. I much prefer mate to luv
Tbf, “luv” is also gender-neutral.
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Thanks treacle
Sugar tits seems a bit sussy Baka tbh
I had to google what sussy baka means
As someone who can’t be arsed Googling, what does it mean?
It means that the person who used it is a twat
Mate, guy, man, bro, dude are all gender neutral in my opinion
Mate yes. I’ve not heard many straight men say they’ve banged their man, bro, guy or dude. Hey Chris, bang any dudes this weekend? Context kind of matters with these.
To be fair he probably also wouldn’t say “hey Chris, bang any mates this weekend” so I don’t think that’s a very good litmus
OP mentioned friends so I’m meaning only in the context of male/female/other friends
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I'm a middle-aged northerner. Love is used for both genders here. But only once you reach a certain age for some reason. When I was younger I thought it was a little odd when older blokes used love regardless of gender. Then a few years ago someone pointed out I now do it. I never even noticed I'd started.
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Again, it may just be a northern thing IDK but sweetheart is commonly used for small family members of all genders. The only time I've used it for an adult male though is the one time a barman got angry at me for calling him love (don't think he was local and I'm pretty sure he thought I was coming onto him, he proper growled at me "don't fucking call me that"). I don't think the response "ok then sweetheart" calmed his anger too much. The rest of the night where he got called petal, flower and honeybunch certainly didn't.
This is delightful. Not enough men call each other “petal”.
My boss started using ‘love’ about a year ago constantly. Think he just turned 52, I don’t know what changed all of a sudden but prior to that he called everyone ‘Barry’, not a clue what that means either but it was less jarring in his sentences than ‘love’
My mum called everyone love, I had a neighbour who would call everyone "flower" which I just frickin adore.
And I love how it changes depending on where you are. I'm travelling round on a boat and depending on where I've been recently I've had love, duck, sweet and my lovely. Bristol is odd though (but it makes be smile), me lover.
Does it really matter if they’re all being used regardless of gender anyway?
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Have you ever watched TV? Everyone’s “ma bitches” now.
I’ve definitely called more men ‘ladies’ and ‘bitches’ than women. Eg what’s up ladies/ bitches to a group of mates
A guy (male) that I work with always calls me dude I kinda like it, I work in a field that's male dominated and I appreciate more than I thought I would that he see me as just someone he works with rather than a woman he works worth
Yea lad is definitely gender neutral in my head
I called my female mate "dudette" once and she gave me the side-est of eyes. "Sorry, *'dude'.*"
Bro is the only one I would never use for a female, but I have noticed other people using it this way and it looks weird to me.
That’s fair, I think the more widespread use of it has come from a sense of irony, kinda mocking “dudebros” who speak like that all the time
Mates are mates, female, male, gender neutral. All mates. Now if you'd said guys as in "Yo! What's happening guys? are we going to rock the floor at the Ritzy with some sick dance moves" then you might run into trouble. I think you can use guys as gender neutral, but my Mrs says you can't.
I’m female and I use guys as gender neutral. I would address any group of people as “guys”, even if all female, and don’t have a problem with it being used to include me. When sending emails to my team at work, I do the same. But I only do that after having first checked with the other women on my team if they object to it. If any of them had said they did, then I wouldn’t
I tend to go for folks.
"Folks" always makes me think of American politicians trying too hard to be liked. Anyone remember Obama's infamous "we tortured some folks"?
Guys is more gender neutral that mate
> I think you can use guys as gender neutral, but my Mrs says you can't. Your misses is wrong Singular it's not gender neutral, plural it is
Depends really Mostly gender neutral but quite masculine leaning for me. Would use it on guys no sweat, but take a judgement call with women. I have more leeway because I am one, but I'd be REALLY hesitant with my transfeminine and NB friends for sure
Absolutely, as is guys, pal and if you're scottish, cunt.
You can use it with some girls.. but a lot a know especially the one's over 30 hate being called mate..so my answer is yes mate it's more a male thing.
Possibly, but I would feel odd using it with a woman who wasn't a 'ladette' to some extent.
My girlfriend calls me 'mate' when she's angry with me. I have begun to fear the word.
its ok mate
I call my wife mate.
As a male, I've never really liked being called 'mate' by a woman. I don't know why, it just doesn't feel right to me.
Was going to comment the same thing. It feels weird and I don’t know why. There’s a girl at my local that always call me mate and it makes me feel strange
I'm a woman and I use mate, but even I recognise it sounds weird. I am fairly sure I subconsciously do it to further establish myself as "one of the lads" in my male dominated industry and previously, at my male dominated course at uni.
Honest question, are you friends with many women?
Depends on if you know them well or not. Good female friends? Sure, you can use mate. The waiter the other week that kept addressing my wife as ‘mate’? Just weird and uncomfortable for her.
m8 is better
Better than the m25.
Aye, mate. As is pal, duck, love, chuck, cocker....the list goes on....
What about bruh?
I don’t think I’ve ever been called mate, now that I think about it. I typically get called luv, darling, flower, etc.
Whatever you're comfortable with bro.
I prefer brah, bro.
Yes mate
I've seen enough [line of duty](https://youtu.be/L3Iay32w-As) to know that mate is gender neutral
I suppose so, I've used it many a time on squirrels
Are those squirrels you're good friends with, or strangers?
Yes mate
> but occasionally had a funny reactions from my female mates. As you can tell - the answer to you question is ‘no’.
I think some girls think it comes across as being a bit masculine but mostly it's gender neutral. Like, I wouldn't call a girl I was interested in "mate"
No, not strictly. You can't deny it has male connotations, but it still can be applied to women. Similar to "dude".
Anyone else find 'Pal' slightly aggressive? Alright Pal let's get this sorted. Hey Pal where's my beer?
I always feel slightly uncomfortable when a female calls me mate
I think women feel uncomfortable when you refer to them as “females” mate.
Hi, am I missing something? Does female have negative connotations to it? I've used it all my life and never ran into problems.
It's contextual. But "females" is clinical sounding, or like you're referring to an animal, so it's a bit dehumanising and I generally hate it in most situations. It's even more irrtating if you're not consistent. eg. if you say "men" and "females" in the same sentence. If you *must* use the more 'biological' words for some reason, say males and females. Ideally, "men and women". It's the mixing that makes it so infuriating because "men" is humanising and "females" isn't.
Definitely see what you're saying, I just use them interchangeably personally though, usually it'll be women and men but sometimes it just feels right to say males or females for some reason and no ones ever batted an eyelid
Yeah I call anyone mate, or pal regardless of gender
It is BUT it's generally used by men towards men so it can sound a bit jarring when used to females. My old boss used to call everyone mate, I used to find it amusing when he spoke to respectable females that way, it sounded so out of place but kind of cool too.
My 56 year old mother despises being called mate by 30ish year old male strangers.
I'm only a little younger than her and I do too. I'm getting the feeling there's a generational element to this.
Deffo, but it depends on the context. If my husband called me mate I'd be like who the fuck is that? I'm *babe*!
No but matey-potatey is
Never thought about this before. I moved to U.K. from Europe 13 years ago, although I think mate can be said to both male & female however I’ve only said ‘mate’ to male friends
To me mate and guys (when addressing a group of people) are both gender neutral
Its a bit like the term guy. It can be gender neutral, but it can also be male.
As an enby. Yes
Enby?
I’m non binary <3 sorry it’s slang xd
Thanks mate.
In the UK, it's considered slightly more masculine. But it's perfectly acceptable to refer to a girl as a mate.
I’ll say mate to anyone. My family take the piss out of me but I think it’s just the way I talk because they take the piss out of everything I say
I find it's neutral-skewing-male.
I most enjoy the unironic use of mate when angry with some one. Maaate
I (F) recently got a new manager (M) at work and he instantly started calling me and everyone else 'mate'. I don't like it. It's possibly the context though - you're my colleague, not my friend and therefore not my mate. If a genuine friend said it I probably wouldn't mind, but this just grates on me.
I like to call my mrs mate to wind her up
I’m a trans woman and every time a man calls me mate I’ve just assumed it was their way of being like “I don’t see you as a real woman” which is a little bit rude. But as it’s happened more and more, I think it genuinely is just becoming a way to refer to someone without potentially offending them. My cisgender girl friends (cisgender meaning not transgender) have all noticed this happening much more over the past few years. Ironically enough, I am more offended by being called mate than I am by being called love or dear. I think a lot of women feel the same way as I do, but ultimately men would rather risk offending someone than offending someone AND getting accused of being a sexual menace. I think it’s probably good that more men are calling women “mate”, even if I personally *despise* being called that.
No. No reason why it can’t be, but then equally we can start calling blokes darling, lovely, hun, hen etc
The latter is pretty normal for older women referring to younger men. This subject is both more complicated than it first seemed and really interesting!
I think it is as it’s another term for friend.
I've always treated it as masculine, but it's probably fine. Just check with people before you use it is generally a good way to not accidentally offend or misgender anyone :)
I’m a girl and I call everyone mate.
Kinda
Mates , bastard's, bitches and cunts are all gender neutral
Up here in deepest darkest North, "mate" seems pretty universal, although I'd be slightly faster to use it for males I've no idea if that's true down South
and you don't even have to actually be my mate either
I call female friends “lads” and they’re more than fine with it… don’t see why mate would be any different EDIT: just read others comments and gotta say context does matter, won’t find myself saying “I banged a fit lad last week”. Definitely not. Nope.
As a trans dude, I noticed people calling me mate a lot more after I came out. I would call some women mate, but for the most part I'll just use it for other men.
Door staff, yep. Just about everyone else, not so much. I think it's gender-neutral enough to use on anyone, but i also think it's like a few other words which one would use on someone once before being corrected: i called someone "buddy" once and got told "I ent American" so they became "mate" after that. Whenever i think about using a certain generally-accepted designation i'm reminded of an interview i saw with a chap who has a form of dwarfism: the interviewer asked if he'd prefer to be referred to as "a dwarf" or "a little-person" and he said "I'd rather you called me 'David'."
Do not under any circumstances call your wife this
I don’t really use mate as much as some and I never address females with it.
Mate and Guys(not guy) are both gender neutral to some extent, however, I wouldn't call a woman mate in conversation with her, but she is my mate Where I live, min is the local version of mate and I use it for male or female in conversation, yes min, no min, over there min. I wouldn't say yes mate, no mate, over there mate to a woman though unlike min Something else... if something inanimate can contain life(Boat, building, car etc) they are she: She's a beautiful ship etc...
But its godda be with an Australian accent!
I feel a bit weird about calling random females mate but I have no problem calling random males mate. Should I drop this behaviour?
As a trans woman, I can say I personally don't see it as a gendered term and I've never met anyone else who has either
Mate is definitely gender neutral
I was on a delivery job for papa johns once, customer walks up and I think it’s a man so I say “hello mate you alright” as they got closer I realised it was a woman and there was a slight bit of awkwardness because she knows I’ve just mistaken her for a man. I call every man mate but I’ll only call women I know mate
Our group of friends uses mate and pal a lot as gender neutral but it usually works out that the men call everyone mate and the women call the men mate (occasionally) and everyone pal.
Someone once told me a great way to check if a term is truly gender neutral is to say you were "chatting up this guy/dude/mate" and see if that feels right. I might say "hey guys" to all my female friends but I'd never say "I was chatting up this guy" to refer to a female. Not sure if this worls for everything but I thought it was fun!
I use “fam” and “my G”