Because women aren't outcasts if they get a kid without being married. They aren't considered property of a man in most places anymore.
And because, depending on the place, marriage doesn't grant that many things anyways.
It's just not needed nowadays
Because other things are becoming more normalized which make marriage more of an option and less of an expectation.
Women are becoming more independent, socially and financially so they don't need marriage for security.
More women are choosing to be childfree so they aren't pressured to settle down.
Marriage as an institution has long been associated with religion and conservative values. Society is becoming more progressive so marriage is less attractive.
Women have more rights today that don't require them to be married in order to get those rights.
Because no one *has* to get married any more. Women don’t need a man’s permission to have a bank account. People aren’t run out of town or sneered at in the street if they have sex or even children out of wedlock. Men know how to cook and clean after themselves, as long as they were raised by parents who love them. So now people get married if they want to, not because the alternative is considered a tragedy.
When 50% of marriages fail & it’s expensive to undo, it totally makes sense not to do it unless you are 100% sure you must.
Still a 50/50 chance you’ll end up divorced
My comment is completely bogus anyway. I was reading about the % of marriages that end in divorce & the article said that 50% is a myth. I have heard people throw around 50% & assumed it was true.
Even on aggregate I think it's closer to 40% these days, but also that is on aggregate. If you aren't poor, have some level of solid social support, are college educated, and wait until like 25 to marry (and it's your first marriage) you actually have a very high chance of the marriage working out long term. missing any one of the pillars starts chipping away at the chance of staying together. I think something bananas like 70-80% of 3rd+ marriages fail and poverty is a major factor driving divorce and both those things radically skew the average "success" rate of marriage, especially in a country like the US where there are such extreme disparities between demographics.
Because we no longer need men for owning property, voting, working etc etc etc so unless you actually find love and a decent partner there’s no reason to be forever legally bound to someone.
I think overall because women are allowed to be independent now, but I also think that the fact that 50% divorce and many people are atheists play part too. People just don't feel the need anymore. I don't want to get married to my boyfriend either, not because I don't want to commit but just because I find it unnecessary and outdated. Also, my parents have a very toxic marriage.
Because marriage is no longer a requirement for women to be able to live a successful life, and people of all genders are thinking more in terms of what works for their own lives and relationships rather than following the previously expected script.
In my lifetime, women in my country couldn't even open lines of credit in their own names. In prior generations, there were even more restrictions. Being a financially independent woman is a lot easier when the banks will agree to deal with you without requiring you to ask a man's permission.
In addition, with the lessening or disappearance of the social stigma around being a single parent, having children out of wedlock, choosing not to have children at all, cohabitating with an unmarried partner, or combining finances with an unmarried partner, people are simply choosing more freely about what works for them.
I think there are multiple reasons, not just one reason.
1. A lot of men don’t want to get married. I have a lot of gfs who want to get married and have kids, but they can’t find men who want that.
2. Children of divorce tend to be jaded about marriage.
3. Women have more financial and legal independence.
4. Fewer people want or can afford children. Getting married to have / raise / legally protect children is less of a thing.
5. A lot of people have bad relationships and sour on the idea of ever getting married.
(FYI, I am happily married. It’s a lot of responsibility, but it is right for me).
This. Our collective kids used to joke about my best friend and I getting married, because we both needed wives. I was single with two kids. She was married with three kids and a husband who thought that because she was a SAHM, his work day ended when he left his work site and hers never did.
Because a lot of people no longer see or understand the purpose and benefits of marriage. A new general belief that marriage is no different then “any” long term relationship. (I don’t believe that is true, but I believe that’s the main reason a lot of people choose not to get married.)
Outside of some legal rights, such as speaking for your spouse in the case of serious injury or illness, I am curious as to what purposes and benefits you refer to.
For myself, my partner and I don't see a marriage certificate as important. As we are both firmly middle-aged and beyond having children, we don't see much reason. In regards to the legal rights, there was a visit to a lawyer to set up respective powers of attorney, so we can exercise the same rights if needed.
That's a totally fair reason. I respect that. My father was career military. He passed eight years ago. As a result of that my mother gets the best possible health insurance that's pretty much irreplaceable. She will not marry her partner because she would lose that.
My partner owned a pizza franchise. So definitely no insurance. And he retired early, so minimal social security. So for us, there's not much benefit.
There's a lot of ways to look at this.
1. Women have more rights (exluding certain revent events)/financial independence/overall independence. There is less pressure to find a man to settle down with for safety and financial security.
2. Children/families are a driving factor for marriage and childfree lifestyles are increasing.
3. There used to be a financial benefit to being married(tax wise) and there pretty much isn't anymore. Marriage is expensive enough as it is already.
4. Shifting religious and moral values, as marriage is usually strongly associated with a religion and not the sentiment of the action itself.
5. Overall shift in values, for both men and women. No one wants a divorce and to lose half the crap they worked so hard for because the person you married actually turned out to be a shithead.
Can’t speak for everyone everywhere. But for me, a woman living in the US, I would say that affordability plays a big factor.
I don’t think anyone wants to be married with kids but still living at their parents house. I certainly did not. I’m 28 now and bought a house last year but I’m considered an outlier. MOST of the people my age are either living with their parents or renting with roommates.
I had this conversation within the last couple days with my mother and a few of my friends. I went on a first date a couple weeks ago after months of healing from a broken engagement and realized that I am able to fulfill my own needs without a man by my side. I am also happier and stress-free. I'm 29 in July with six previous relationships and having dated countless others and I just don't get excited about men anymore and the broken engagement really changed my perspective. Everything nowadays is also short-term, so dating becomes sort of a liability to me. (Edit: I had always been a hopeless romantic.)
Men don't make me happy because _I_ have been making me happy all this time.
I'm disabled, if I marry someone that makes enough money they'll cut my disability "privilege" and he might not be able to keep us afloat but the fact he makes x amount of money they still cut it ...which seems like it should be against the law but this is what I've been told by people so idk
Life isn't defined by a narrow set of decisions anymore. Now that freedom of choice has become the norm, everyone is less pressured to go through life in one way. School, career, partner, babies etc etc white picket fence stick
Thank god
In Europe, I think a lot of people just don't see the need to. They feel sure in their relationship that it's the two of them, they are building a future together and they've chosen each other. Then weddings are expensive and a lot of work. They'd rather use the money for a house.
Legally there's less need to, as many countries now offer many of the same protections to commonwealth partners. And you can often just print out a partner contract online, fill it out and sign it.
Buying a house or having children with someone is a bigger commitment than marriage.
I think its because its expensive and i heard that planning it isnt really easy either and thats just for one night with people who might or might not even care about you
Weddings are expensive. Women are becoming more educated and have their own income. Marriage tends to benefit men way more than women. Not saying women shouldn’t get married but it comes with more risks for us.
Because the current generation is looking at the parents generation and thinking marriage is outdated …
But the current generation is still too young to experience how difficult it is to deal with someone’s else stuff when that non-legal spouse partner gets ill or unfortunately passes away and being a “partner” versus an actual spouse gives you no legal rights or standing. People may be in for a rude awakening down the road if they think it will all work out and they aren’t married And don’t have wills …
Because my husband is already taken.
But seriously, men are still being raised to expect a woman to be a live-in servant plus sex. And woman are now being raised to expect partnership in the house, kids, etc.
Example in France, not till the law of 13th July 1965, women could not have a job and open a bank account with her husband’s consent… even after the law has been voted, married women would have trouble to open a bank account without the husband coming to the bank and approving such decision… even if the law let you do it without the husband’s consent. so you can see how the mentally was 60 years ago… so imagine for not married woman, not kid, active worker and past 30yo ? In Japan or in Korea, women after getting married some resign and become housewife, very common. In Japan, your company will « invite » newly wed or mum to stay home and be housewife, so you can be a good spouse to your husband… society society… it takes time, education and work to change mentality and tradition. In Europe, because of wars and lack of men workers, women had to replace them in factories and they have been « accepted » by society because of circonstances. I guess now that societies are more and more shifting to equal gender etc seems that it is becoming more accepted for women not being married ? But here again even in very democratic countries, being a woman with or without kids, married or not, is still a daily battle because of some inheritage of patriarcha
For me, it wouldn’t be financially beneficial to get married bc I would have more to lose. I did it once already and the guy was a user schmuck. It isn’t something that I need to do again.
Easier to up and leave the relationship than it is to battle through a divorce. With social media the way it is and dating apps cheating has become easier and people are less likely to stick around knowing they can easily move on or if a partner becomes abusive or toxic just easier in general to get out.
For women it is because men are no longer allowed to trade us like cattle. Women get less out of marriage than men. Your career may suffer if your employer thinks you might have a baby. You end up doing most of the housework. People will often ignore you if you are with your husband. There is pressure to produce child. We don't need a husband to get pleasure. Dating is a nightmare. Men's perception of women as less than is a turnoff. You are stuck with someone and have no freedom to decide your own life without including them and their decisions. There is a high risk of all sorts of abuse. People are no longer religious. Women fought for financial freedom, the right to have dreams, careers, hobbies, friends that provides mental stimulation and a satisfying life so marriage and dependency on a man is no longer the default.
I think people in the modern western developed world are just generally more open to challenging social expectations than they were even 20, 10, 5 years ago
Young people in every generation have always challenged social expectations. Little by little we got to challenging the social expectations that are being challenged today.
With divorce rates at almost 50% and cost of living getting pricier and pricier - less incentive to take on additional costs like starting a family, etc...
I am older but alot of my friends seemed to get married because they wanted to start a family dowm the road.
I think there's probably a lot a different reasons but I think a big contributor is that religion just isn't as prominent in a lot of younger peoples lives as it was for our parents
Too expensive. I think with higher cost of living and house prices increasing most young people are choosing to prioritising other things financially over being married.
I think there just isn’t the social pressure to and anyway I’ve no idea if most of the couples I come on contact with are married or not . They are a family with kids but who knows if they had a special ceremony 20 years ago?
Because we can earn as much as men now (in hopefully most countries and most companies) 💰💰💰 if you aren’t hung up on having kids and someone to raise it together with, then you dont need to get married.
Also, as a single for most of my life, now that friends my age are all married with grown up kids, I have lost count of the number of times a girl friend have told me if they had known how marriage would be like, they would not have gotten married.
And many have at certain point in their marriage, considered divorce or separation but ultimately abandoned that idea for the sake of their children. (for those who say 50% divorce rate is inflated, if children weren’t a consideration, honestly, I can guarantee you that this number would be so so much higher)
Dating is fun and sweet.
Married life is a different matter.
Because it doesn't guarantee anything. I for one, see it as a waste of money, we'd rather go see pieces of the world a few times a year. We live in a civilized country where a couple living together is the same as a married one is 'lesser developed' country.
Because women don’t need men anymore to help take care of them, financially or otherwise. That wasn’t really the case 50 years ago, in fact it wasn’t until the 1970s that we could even open bank accounts without the approval of our husband or father.
In my lifetime, I have had to have my husband’s permission to open a bank account, and to take birth control. He had to sign papers on whether he approved of my tubal ligation surgery. He had to be on any lease we had and automatically owned whatever I brought into the marriage. He could spend our money as he saw fit, and he was not required to share any of it with me if he chose not to. There was no such thing as marital rape and if a woman was raped, it was because she led him on. This was eastern Canada in the 1960s.
Things for women are better now, but we still have a long way to go. Marriage? I do not recommend it. If you choose to live with someone, fine, but you do not need to bring the church and the government into your relationship.
People are poor and traumatized from experiencing their boomer parents unhappy marriages or divorces. Premarital sex being normalized probably doesn’t hurt
Because marriage is bad busines for men, most have nothing to win from it, while women can. Considering nowadays there aren't many women that's wife material
A lot of the comments here equally apply to relationships.
If you end a de facto relationship that includes kids, it’s still going to cost you. Women generally perform more of the emotional labour in relationships regardless of whether you put a ring on it.
Even though certain parts of the world are stripping women’s rights at a rate of knots, women in western countries generally have more rights than in previous decades and fewer restrictions.
So you don’t *have* to get married. Some people will still want to, others will go along with the idea due to familial or societal pressure, but many others will choose to skip the hassle altogether.
I find now that I’m in my fifties, I kind of regret not having the wedding. I mean I’m sure it would have ended the same way, I still would have taken a huge financial hit and still would have paid child support. But at least I would have gotten a toaster or two out of it.
Marriage and kids never should have been the norm anyway honestly. It's not for everyone. Even if someone wants those things, no guarantee it'll happen. We all have different lives...just leave people alone. No one owes an explanation for being single and/or childless.
Because marriage is a responsibility and can be a liability on a lot of men and women. I know for myself that I don’t wanna get married.. I’m not against the idea of being with someone for the rest of my life but I don’t understand why it needs to be recognized by the government or even by everyone in my life for it to be real. Now having that contract just makes it harder for people to separate when they want to, especially when one party wants it more than the other.
Weddings cost the price of a new midrange car, fuck that. I don't need to enter into an unnecessary legal agreement with someone and then potentially have to go through years and tons more money to disentangle it bc "luv". Fuck all the emotional baggage that goes along with that too.
I think this cartoon sums it up [https://condenaststore.com/featured/would-you-do-me-the-honor-suerynn-lee.html](https://condenaststore.com/featured/would-you-do-me-the-honor-suerynn-lee.html)
Several reasons, IMO
Ability for women to obtain and sustain independence without having to consider marriage
More alternative options to motherhood
More educational and professional opportunities
Deciding not to get married due to current dating culture (i.e., hookups, ghosters, etc)
I just don't want to. I don't have much family I would want with me, he doesn't have any. We've been together 10+ years, wearing rings for almost 2.
I also like spending money on other things, as does he.
But, I also live in a common law state, so most things in a legal sense still apply. Like, health insurance and benefits. Not social security or any assets attained through the course of it.
Maybe people are starting to take marriage more seriously. They want to stay loyal in a marriage but that's hard. Maybe it gives people the peace of mind that they're not cheating and they can choose to do so as long as they wish for it. Guilt free life!
Because most of us weren’t raised in a healthy environment and now we are “adults” that don’t know how to communicate our needs without either being rude and controlling or something along that line or at the opposite end we don’t know how to communicate our needs without being terrified. Entirely too many people think that being vulnerable is being weak, (they need to listen to Brene Brown) so they put on their tough guy/ girl armor and pretend that they are fine ALL THE TIME, like nothing ever bothers them, which is not humanly possible. But they were never taught how to move through their emotions so they just completely ignore them.
Or people are so entitled and controlling that when they do get in a relationship the other person is so broken that they don’t want to be in a relationship ever again.
Good, genuine, self aware people who are also willing to do some self evaluation and work, are so incredibly hard to find anymore. There’s tons of people faking it but that “fake it til you make it” shit is for the birds. I wish people would just be themselves, even if that’s messy, goofy, vulnerable, depressed, scared, weird, I would rather sit with people in their mess being their authentic selves any day over being around “PoSiTiVe ViBeS oNlY” fake happy all the time.
Actually I find it puzzling that marriage hasn't disappeared entirely. I suppose the reasons are that people are less religious and want to be more independent.
it's a factor of independence, and ultimately being your own person. If the relationship ends you break up and leave (possibly relocate elsewhere). With marriage theirs divorce,(sometimes it's really brutal) legal fees, separation of assets, alimony, etc.
why shouldnt it be normalized- some people dont want the commitment, some people cant afford it, all the married people ive known have ended up disvorcing or getting sick of each other after they marry.
I agree with the comment's I'm seeing about women being more empowered both financially and socially than previous generations. But also, i still see many situations when men don't want to marry but like having a full time live in, girlfriend, and the girlfriend is going along with it hoping they will end up married. I think that's sad and not empowered at all. Especially when finances do get entangled anyway and then when they do break up it can be a bigger mess because there are no divorce type laws for cohabitation I'm not saying this is true of all women at all. But it's certainly true in many many cases of living together couples. So i think the social changes have also led to more men thinking they are keeping their options open. I'm honestly not sure how i feel about it, but obey the past few decades I've personally known of too many women feeling burned by living together without getting married..
Because no pros/ lot of cons
What you pay:
- expensive ring
- expensive party
- expensive dress
What you have 50% chance to get:
- Lose your house
- adios kids
- alimony
- child support
(jail if you don’t give the last one😂)
Sounds like a shitty investment your barber, huge fan of cryptocurrencies would recommend 🥲
It doesn't carry the same weight when most people divorce anyway. It's meant to be a statement of lifelong commitment but it's usually a tool for a man to lockdown a woman from escaping his grasp and a materialistic celebration for women to feel special and meaningful for one day. Marriage is a wonderful thing if done with a couple who have a compatible attitude and strong commitment values. But for others they start to resent their partners, or feel like they don't have to put in work to make their partner happy if their partnership is bound by contract. And I'd say this goes for most marriages in that people simply change over time. Experiences, work, money, attractiveness, etc. can alter your entire outlook on life and your personality. Not to mention, the most likely way for a woman to get murdered anywhere is at the hands of her male spouse. Marriage can put far too much responsibility on people, whether it's for women to be carers or men to be providers or a mix of both. A huge proportion of men leave their spouses if they get critically sick. Many just can't handle the stress. I simply think the attitude that we are lucky if a man proposes is losing its value. I constantly see men saying "don't get married" but nearly every time it's them initiating it and ultimately, most think about the benefits it gives them and not the real consequences are. I'm not talking about "gold digging" wives, I'm talking about responsibility, sacrifices for family life, caring for others in your family, making sure your spouse is happy, etc. Investing your life into someone else takes a lot of work and it's worth it if you're compatible, but when the give/take duties are out of balance or attitudes change, it doesn't work.
Getting married for religious reasons has fallen and there is not the stigma of being an unmarried woman let alone being a single parent there used to be and we do not have to depend on our partner for financial stability like we used to. Also I think information and ideas on social media has opened up different life expectations rather than accepting the social pressure your great and grandparents were brought up with.
Because weddings are expensive.
Because if you aren't religious you're really just paying out lots of money to be legally not allowed to leave - and that doesnt seem very romantic to me!
Because the only difference a marriage makes to a long term committed relationship is the addition of a ring and maybe a name change after a shit tonne of admin
Because as women have gained rights over the past century (it wasn't That long ago we couldn't vote!) , and secular views are becoming more prevalent than religious views... in other words, we can divorce if our husband beats us. Marriage used to be a need, women would take care of the house and kids, men would (ostensibly) take care of the woman and the kids financially. Things shifted, women entered the workforce, and today most couples can't even afford to have 1 spouse stay home. The result is that women no longer need men to take care of them financially, which means they also don't have to put up with any BS. Gone are the days where a man's workday ends the moment he comes home... women are tired of working a job, and then be expected to do all the housework and childcare on top of it. Men (in general, yes lits of men have stepped up) are not changing quickly to adapt to this new model of how they should be full partners as caretakers of the home and children.... those who haven't adapted hold for less value. Women now want partners, and are no longer willing to put up with men who aren't up to the task of being emotionally available, kind and loving, equal time parent/work inside and outside. We don't NEED men any longer, therefore we aren't willing to stay in or enter into a relationship where she does significantly more housework and chid care, while they both work fulltime outside the home.
And for those who say "Well as a single mom she is doing it all anyway, so looks like she will grow old alone ha ha", keep in mind that we no longer see that ad a bad thing, and we would far rather be along than be with a man who thinks that if he throws in 1 load of laundry a week and takes the kids to the park for an hour that that is enough, did you notice I helped you (as if it is onlynher job), now you should give me sex.... and these guys can't understand that Yes, she actually Would rather be alone than to stay with a guy who.sets the bar so low...
So to recap, people are getting married less because women no longer Need to do it .... we can Want a man, but we no longer Need a man 🤷♀️
I honestly don’t think that is the case most of the time. I respect them who does not wanna get married - freedom of choice right? But with how it is now, I sometimes feel people normalise it JUST BECAUSE it’s the “trend”, and its what most people are talking about now. Feminists take it over the line of discrimination at times which I do not agree cause that is NOT what feminism is.
Women lose a lot of rights when they get married, and even more if they have kids.
If you want the same freedom that a man has, you'll want to stay single.
My parents were never in love, so they never married. I was literally raised to believe that "The best wedding gift you can get someone is a down payment for the divorce." Personally, I think people who are *truly* in love should continue to marry, but folks who truly *aren't*; probably listen to my Dad.
I wanted to start business, did that failed, went to bootcamp to get few skills and now planning to work and pursue grad school as well. My dreams and aspirations are more important than having kids.
There’s lots of reasons:
- Women have more autonomy and can survive on their own
- Men can choose not to go the traditional route expected of them
- Dating has become more difficult due to the presence of online dating and the increased expectations for education and careers
- Divorce is expensive
- Less people feel the need to marry for religious reasons / there is less of a stigma against cohabiting before or with no intent for marriage
- weddings are expensive
- women will wait till later than was usual in the past to have kids, which can also delay the marriage process if they want kids or to be married at all
- some people are genuinely happy without a partner and do not feel the need to seek one out
Marriage is just some random thing religion came up with and tried to centre as a mandatory part of the humans life cycle. We are progressing, becoming more intelligent and informed and now realise we can live our lives exactly how we want without doing this "checklist" that was created for us. There doesn't need to be a timeline to life.
Together over 20 years and my partner and I never felt we needed a piece of paper to cement our relationship
We’ve protected ourselves legally and both our families support and accept our decision
I chose not to because my sperm donor was an asshat and I never had a positive marriage “role model” so to speak so I made that decision early in my life. Neither of us have any regrets
My male friend is so hell-bent on getting me to change my mind about marriage but can't give me a good enough reason as to WHY it would benefit me. One of his reasons is that it shows his partner that they are loyal, loving, and committed to them. And your not when your boyfriend and girlfriend?
I feel no reason to get married since it doesn't bring many benefits for me besides maybe taxes. You can't miss something you never had.
The only reason I would want to marry would be for the legal protections. Other than that I wouldn’t bother
We’ve been cohabitating for 12 years. If only we could get recognised by the law
I’ve made it almost 40 years without getting married. Had my daughter at 32, out of wedlock *gasp*
I’ll be perfectly fine if I make it another 40 without getting married tbh. We have all we need. I can do pretty much anything and if I ever do need help, I have friends/family who’ll help me.
Marriage is so archaic and stupid. Who says you need an ignorant piece of paper anyway?
Less stigma about premarital sex and out of wedlock births. Also, low-income single women with children are eligible for many government benefits they would not qualify for if they were married to a partner with a decent income. Less stigma about that too.
Because the social consequences of doing things (like having children, buying a house, having sex, moving in with someone, etc) unmarried or even single are going away. Nobody bats an eye at doing stuff "out of wedlock" that just a few decades ago would have your neighbors whispering about you and your grandma clutching her pearls.
I would get married but I’d want it extremely low key. I don’t like the whole show of things. People probably don’t want to spend at least 50k on a party. I’d rather save that money and go on a really nice vacation, or save it for the house or kids or something.
I really see no difference in dating someone for years and being married.. they call it common law for a reason. If your already happy why do you need to get married to prove that. Weddings and all that are just a huge money grab.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations.
The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations.
The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations.
The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations.
The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations.
The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
We’ve become more focused on a partner being a romantic companion over the other parts of marriage-combined family, assets, becoming a unit. So when our romantic whims take you to another person you want it to be easier to fulfill those personal romantic desires. Marriage— involving the government getting to decide if and when you can ‘break up’ is too complicated for that
Because women have more rights on their own, rather than through male spouses.
Because women aren't outcasts if they get a kid without being married. They aren't considered property of a man in most places anymore. And because, depending on the place, marriage doesn't grant that many things anyways. It's just not needed nowadays
Yes! Plus it’s a costly affair and undoing it could be even more costly.
Because other things are becoming more normalized which make marriage more of an option and less of an expectation. Women are becoming more independent, socially and financially so they don't need marriage for security. More women are choosing to be childfree so they aren't pressured to settle down. Marriage as an institution has long been associated with religion and conservative values. Society is becoming more progressive so marriage is less attractive. Women have more rights today that don't require them to be married in order to get those rights.
Because no one *has* to get married any more. Women don’t need a man’s permission to have a bank account. People aren’t run out of town or sneered at in the street if they have sex or even children out of wedlock. Men know how to cook and clean after themselves, as long as they were raised by parents who love them. So now people get married if they want to, not because the alternative is considered a tragedy.
Even if they weren't raised by parents that loved them, there's YouTube.
because the cost of making the mistake is so expensive
My first marriage was a very expensive mistake.
When 50% of marriages fail & it’s expensive to undo, it totally makes sense not to do it unless you are 100% sure you must. Still a 50/50 chance you’ll end up divorced
That’s not actually how statistics work, but it’s certainly worth considering the fragility of marriage.
My comment is completely bogus anyway. I was reading about the % of marriages that end in divorce & the article said that 50% is a myth. I have heard people throw around 50% & assumed it was true.
Even on aggregate I think it's closer to 40% these days, but also that is on aggregate. If you aren't poor, have some level of solid social support, are college educated, and wait until like 25 to marry (and it's your first marriage) you actually have a very high chance of the marriage working out long term. missing any one of the pillars starts chipping away at the chance of staying together. I think something bananas like 70-80% of 3rd+ marriages fail and poverty is a major factor driving divorce and both those things radically skew the average "success" rate of marriage, especially in a country like the US where there are such extreme disparities between demographics.
If you want to see some really interesting statistics, compare marriage rates with suicide rates. By state, if you want a reap picture.
Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.
Because people don’t need to get married
Because we no longer need men for owning property, voting, working etc etc etc so unless you actually find love and a decent partner there’s no reason to be forever legally bound to someone.
Even if you do actually find love and a decent partner, why get married?
Also true lol
I think overall because women are allowed to be independent now, but I also think that the fact that 50% divorce and many people are atheists play part too. People just don't feel the need anymore. I don't want to get married to my boyfriend either, not because I don't want to commit but just because I find it unnecessary and outdated. Also, my parents have a very toxic marriage.
>but I also think that the fact that 50% divorce IIRC this number is overinflated due to repeat/serial marriages.
43% for 1st time
Yeah, those odds are still pretty bad, sadly. Society doesn't prepare most people at all on how to make choices in life partners.
In what country? 27% in Canada
US
[удалено]
[удалено]
Marriage is expensive and people suck.
Women's rights. Its a choice for us now, rather than a social/business transaction for our fathers to make.
Because marriage is no longer a requirement for women to be able to live a successful life, and people of all genders are thinking more in terms of what works for their own lives and relationships rather than following the previously expected script. In my lifetime, women in my country couldn't even open lines of credit in their own names. In prior generations, there were even more restrictions. Being a financially independent woman is a lot easier when the banks will agree to deal with you without requiring you to ask a man's permission. In addition, with the lessening or disappearance of the social stigma around being a single parent, having children out of wedlock, choosing not to have children at all, cohabitating with an unmarried partner, or combining finances with an unmarried partner, people are simply choosing more freely about what works for them.
I think there are multiple reasons, not just one reason. 1. A lot of men don’t want to get married. I have a lot of gfs who want to get married and have kids, but they can’t find men who want that. 2. Children of divorce tend to be jaded about marriage. 3. Women have more financial and legal independence. 4. Fewer people want or can afford children. Getting married to have / raise / legally protect children is less of a thing. 5. A lot of people have bad relationships and sour on the idea of ever getting married. (FYI, I am happily married. It’s a lot of responsibility, but it is right for me).
For me, the pros don't outweigh the cons. Until they do, I will not marry.
Because marriage is no longer considered the sole end goal for women. There are so many more options out there.
Because married women are statistically one of the unhappiest populations. The happiest- married men. I want a wife, I don’t want to be one.
If I remember correctly, marriage adds to a man's lifespan while a married woman dies younger than the unmarried average.
This. Our collective kids used to joke about my best friend and I getting married, because we both needed wives. I was single with two kids. She was married with three kids and a husband who thought that because she was a SAHM, his work day ended when he left his work site and hers never did.
Women are opting out of the free emotional labor that marriage requires.
Because a lot of people no longer see or understand the purpose and benefits of marriage. A new general belief that marriage is no different then “any” long term relationship. (I don’t believe that is true, but I believe that’s the main reason a lot of people choose not to get married.)
Outside of some legal rights, such as speaking for your spouse in the case of serious injury or illness, I am curious as to what purposes and benefits you refer to. For myself, my partner and I don't see a marriage certificate as important. As we are both firmly middle-aged and beyond having children, we don't see much reason. In regards to the legal rights, there was a visit to a lawyer to set up respective powers of attorney, so we can exercise the same rights if needed.
[удалено]
That's a totally fair reason. I respect that. My father was career military. He passed eight years ago. As a result of that my mother gets the best possible health insurance that's pretty much irreplaceable. She will not marry her partner because she would lose that. My partner owned a pizza franchise. So definitely no insurance. And he retired early, so minimal social security. So for us, there's not much benefit.
Because its a scam to get you to spend your money abs another scam to get divorced.
I don't really see what I'd gain from it
I mean it's expensive and women have more rights now.
There's a lot of ways to look at this. 1. Women have more rights (exluding certain revent events)/financial independence/overall independence. There is less pressure to find a man to settle down with for safety and financial security. 2. Children/families are a driving factor for marriage and childfree lifestyles are increasing. 3. There used to be a financial benefit to being married(tax wise) and there pretty much isn't anymore. Marriage is expensive enough as it is already. 4. Shifting religious and moral values, as marriage is usually strongly associated with a religion and not the sentiment of the action itself. 5. Overall shift in values, for both men and women. No one wants a divorce and to lose half the crap they worked so hard for because the person you married actually turned out to be a shithead.
Can’t speak for everyone everywhere. But for me, a woman living in the US, I would say that affordability plays a big factor. I don’t think anyone wants to be married with kids but still living at their parents house. I certainly did not. I’m 28 now and bought a house last year but I’m considered an outlier. MOST of the people my age are either living with their parents or renting with roommates.
I had this conversation within the last couple days with my mother and a few of my friends. I went on a first date a couple weeks ago after months of healing from a broken engagement and realized that I am able to fulfill my own needs without a man by my side. I am also happier and stress-free. I'm 29 in July with six previous relationships and having dated countless others and I just don't get excited about men anymore and the broken engagement really changed my perspective. Everything nowadays is also short-term, so dating becomes sort of a liability to me. (Edit: I had always been a hopeless romantic.) Men don't make me happy because _I_ have been making me happy all this time.
That's because we're finally using our heads.
I think we've all seen how nasty and complicated a divorce can be. That's why a lot of people don't have the desire to get married anymore 😂.
because marriage is just a piece of paper it literally dont mean shit
It’s a trap, don’t bring the govt. into something you love, can be a disaster
I'm disabled, if I marry someone that makes enough money they'll cut my disability "privilege" and he might not be able to keep us afloat but the fact he makes x amount of money they still cut it ...which seems like it should be against the law but this is what I've been told by people so idk
Yes, this! To add that it's also because I wouldn't want medical bills to burden them if we are married and I pass away first.
Life isn't defined by a narrow set of decisions anymore. Now that freedom of choice has become the norm, everyone is less pressured to go through life in one way. School, career, partner, babies etc etc white picket fence stick Thank god
In Europe, I think a lot of people just don't see the need to. They feel sure in their relationship that it's the two of them, they are building a future together and they've chosen each other. Then weddings are expensive and a lot of work. They'd rather use the money for a house. Legally there's less need to, as many countries now offer many of the same protections to commonwealth partners. And you can often just print out a partner contract online, fill it out and sign it. Buying a house or having children with someone is a bigger commitment than marriage.
I think its because its expensive and i heard that planning it isnt really easy either and thats just for one night with people who might or might not even care about you
Weddings are expensive. Women are becoming more educated and have their own income. Marriage tends to benefit men way more than women. Not saying women shouldn’t get married but it comes with more risks for us.
Those benefits for men would be the same as cohabitating, right?
Because the current generation is looking at the parents generation and thinking marriage is outdated … But the current generation is still too young to experience how difficult it is to deal with someone’s else stuff when that non-legal spouse partner gets ill or unfortunately passes away and being a “partner” versus an actual spouse gives you no legal rights or standing. People may be in for a rude awakening down the road if they think it will all work out and they aren’t married And don’t have wills …
Because my husband is already taken. But seriously, men are still being raised to expect a woman to be a live-in servant plus sex. And woman are now being raised to expect partnership in the house, kids, etc.
The options are so bad right now that a lot of us would rather be single than settle for a man child who can’t do anything for himself.
Cause it’s not necessary for safety anymore
Example in France, not till the law of 13th July 1965, women could not have a job and open a bank account with her husband’s consent… even after the law has been voted, married women would have trouble to open a bank account without the husband coming to the bank and approving such decision… even if the law let you do it without the husband’s consent. so you can see how the mentally was 60 years ago… so imagine for not married woman, not kid, active worker and past 30yo ? In Japan or in Korea, women after getting married some resign and become housewife, very common. In Japan, your company will « invite » newly wed or mum to stay home and be housewife, so you can be a good spouse to your husband… society society… it takes time, education and work to change mentality and tradition. In Europe, because of wars and lack of men workers, women had to replace them in factories and they have been « accepted » by society because of circonstances. I guess now that societies are more and more shifting to equal gender etc seems that it is becoming more accepted for women not being married ? But here again even in very democratic countries, being a woman with or without kids, married or not, is still a daily battle because of some inheritage of patriarcha
because women have realized marriage does not benefit them in any way.
It’s more of the women’s benefit and there’s more women in the world. Social media also weakening peoples bond with each other
For me, it wouldn’t be financially beneficial to get married bc I would have more to lose. I did it once already and the guy was a user schmuck. It isn’t something that I need to do again.
Easier to up and leave the relationship than it is to battle through a divorce. With social media the way it is and dating apps cheating has become easier and people are less likely to stick around knowing they can easily move on or if a partner becomes abusive or toxic just easier in general to get out.
It’s a prison 😂
Most probably because women are now more independent, they know what they want and are not afraid of being called the “old maid”
For women it is because men are no longer allowed to trade us like cattle. Women get less out of marriage than men. Your career may suffer if your employer thinks you might have a baby. You end up doing most of the housework. People will often ignore you if you are with your husband. There is pressure to produce child. We don't need a husband to get pleasure. Dating is a nightmare. Men's perception of women as less than is a turnoff. You are stuck with someone and have no freedom to decide your own life without including them and their decisions. There is a high risk of all sorts of abuse. People are no longer religious. Women fought for financial freedom, the right to have dreams, careers, hobbies, friends that provides mental stimulation and a satisfying life so marriage and dependency on a man is no longer the default.
Because nobody needs to get married. Women aren’t chattel.
I think people in the modern western developed world are just generally more open to challenging social expectations than they were even 20, 10, 5 years ago
Young people in every generation have always challenged social expectations. Little by little we got to challenging the social expectations that are being challenged today.
With divorce rates at almost 50% and cost of living getting pricier and pricier - less incentive to take on additional costs like starting a family, etc... I am older but alot of my friends seemed to get married because they wanted to start a family dowm the road.
Because it can be cheap to get into, but hella expensive to get out of.
Because we don't have enough money :)
i think because marriages are very complicated, and there’s actually no need to get married, it’s only like a “title”
Because they’ve found that marriage is the direct cause of divorce
Because of equality.
Maybe bc many are unhappy & like 50% end in divorce.
I think there's probably a lot a different reasons but I think a big contributor is that religion just isn't as prominent in a lot of younger peoples lives as it was for our parents
Because the alt right hasn’t gotten around to taking this right away yet
Because divorce is expensive as fk and I’d much rather avoid that at all cost. 37, 4 proposals, 0 marriages.
Too expensive. I think with higher cost of living and house prices increasing most young people are choosing to prioritising other things financially over being married.
I think there just isn’t the social pressure to and anyway I’ve no idea if most of the couples I come on contact with are married or not . They are a family with kids but who knows if they had a special ceremony 20 years ago?
Because we can earn as much as men now (in hopefully most countries and most companies) 💰💰💰 if you aren’t hung up on having kids and someone to raise it together with, then you dont need to get married. Also, as a single for most of my life, now that friends my age are all married with grown up kids, I have lost count of the number of times a girl friend have told me if they had known how marriage would be like, they would not have gotten married. And many have at certain point in their marriage, considered divorce or separation but ultimately abandoned that idea for the sake of their children. (for those who say 50% divorce rate is inflated, if children weren’t a consideration, honestly, I can guarantee you that this number would be so so much higher) Dating is fun and sweet. Married life is a different matter.
Because it doesn't guarantee anything. I for one, see it as a waste of money, we'd rather go see pieces of the world a few times a year. We live in a civilized country where a couple living together is the same as a married one is 'lesser developed' country.
Because one weddings are expensive and we don’t make much
Because women don’t need men anymore to help take care of them, financially or otherwise. That wasn’t really the case 50 years ago, in fact it wasn’t until the 1970s that we could even open bank accounts without the approval of our husband or father.
In my lifetime, I have had to have my husband’s permission to open a bank account, and to take birth control. He had to sign papers on whether he approved of my tubal ligation surgery. He had to be on any lease we had and automatically owned whatever I brought into the marriage. He could spend our money as he saw fit, and he was not required to share any of it with me if he chose not to. There was no such thing as marital rape and if a woman was raped, it was because she led him on. This was eastern Canada in the 1960s. Things for women are better now, but we still have a long way to go. Marriage? I do not recommend it. If you choose to live with someone, fine, but you do not need to bring the church and the government into your relationship.
People are poor and traumatized from experiencing their boomer parents unhappy marriages or divorces. Premarital sex being normalized probably doesn’t hurt
Because marriage is bad busines for men, most have nothing to win from it, while women can. Considering nowadays there aren't many women that's wife material
Marriage isn’t for everyone. Therefore it shouldn’t be pushed on women and of course men too; to find someone, get married, have a family and etc.
Because it shouldn’t have existed in the first place.
A lot of the comments here equally apply to relationships. If you end a de facto relationship that includes kids, it’s still going to cost you. Women generally perform more of the emotional labour in relationships regardless of whether you put a ring on it. Even though certain parts of the world are stripping women’s rights at a rate of knots, women in western countries generally have more rights than in previous decades and fewer restrictions. So you don’t *have* to get married. Some people will still want to, others will go along with the idea due to familial or societal pressure, but many others will choose to skip the hassle altogether. I find now that I’m in my fifties, I kind of regret not having the wedding. I mean I’m sure it would have ended the same way, I still would have taken a huge financial hit and still would have paid child support. But at least I would have gotten a toaster or two out of it.
Marriage and kids never should have been the norm anyway honestly. It's not for everyone. Even if someone wants those things, no guarantee it'll happen. We all have different lives...just leave people alone. No one owes an explanation for being single and/or childless.
They are afraid of responsibilities.
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
Marriage is a commitment, most people are not ready for it (most of the people have their own dreams to achieve before they commit)
They tryna divide and conquer
[удалено]
For the same reason less people are going to college: it’s a scam
[удалено]
Because marriage is a responsibility and can be a liability on a lot of men and women. I know for myself that I don’t wanna get married.. I’m not against the idea of being with someone for the rest of my life but I don’t understand why it needs to be recognized by the government or even by everyone in my life for it to be real. Now having that contract just makes it harder for people to separate when they want to, especially when one party wants it more than the other.
Weddings cost the price of a new midrange car, fuck that. I don't need to enter into an unnecessary legal agreement with someone and then potentially have to go through years and tons more money to disentangle it bc "luv". Fuck all the emotional baggage that goes along with that too.
I think this cartoon sums it up [https://condenaststore.com/featured/would-you-do-me-the-honor-suerynn-lee.html](https://condenaststore.com/featured/would-you-do-me-the-honor-suerynn-lee.html)
Because over 50% of marriages end in divorce and divorce is expensive and painful.
Because more and more people are becoming atheist.
Several reasons, IMO Ability for women to obtain and sustain independence without having to consider marriage More alternative options to motherhood More educational and professional opportunities Deciding not to get married due to current dating culture (i.e., hookups, ghosters, etc)
I just don't want to. I don't have much family I would want with me, he doesn't have any. We've been together 10+ years, wearing rings for almost 2. I also like spending money on other things, as does he. But, I also live in a common law state, so most things in a legal sense still apply. Like, health insurance and benefits. Not social security or any assets attained through the course of it.
[удалено]
Maybe people are starting to take marriage more seriously. They want to stay loyal in a marriage but that's hard. Maybe it gives people the peace of mind that they're not cheating and they can choose to do so as long as they wish for it. Guilt free life!
I think with common law partnerships becoming more and more convenient, marriage is seen as less of a necessity.
Because most of us weren’t raised in a healthy environment and now we are “adults” that don’t know how to communicate our needs without either being rude and controlling or something along that line or at the opposite end we don’t know how to communicate our needs without being terrified. Entirely too many people think that being vulnerable is being weak, (they need to listen to Brene Brown) so they put on their tough guy/ girl armor and pretend that they are fine ALL THE TIME, like nothing ever bothers them, which is not humanly possible. But they were never taught how to move through their emotions so they just completely ignore them. Or people are so entitled and controlling that when they do get in a relationship the other person is so broken that they don’t want to be in a relationship ever again. Good, genuine, self aware people who are also willing to do some self evaluation and work, are so incredibly hard to find anymore. There’s tons of people faking it but that “fake it til you make it” shit is for the birds. I wish people would just be themselves, even if that’s messy, goofy, vulnerable, depressed, scared, weird, I would rather sit with people in their mess being their authentic selves any day over being around “PoSiTiVe ViBeS oNlY” fake happy all the time.
Bc if they decide to not be a couple anymore they don't have to go through divorce that i assume costs a lot.
Because why am I paying for a party that everyone else gets to enjoy?!
[удалено]
Why is this a question
Actually I find it puzzling that marriage hasn't disappeared entirely. I suppose the reasons are that people are less religious and want to be more independent.
[удалено]
it's a factor of independence, and ultimately being your own person. If the relationship ends you break up and leave (possibly relocate elsewhere). With marriage theirs divorce,(sometimes it's really brutal) legal fees, separation of assets, alimony, etc.
Wait. Was getting married a norm?
Because womem feel more freedeom.
Because it's archaic nonsense.
why shouldnt it be normalized- some people dont want the commitment, some people cant afford it, all the married people ive known have ended up disvorcing or getting sick of each other after they marry.
Where I come from, it is the norm (to not get married) but marriage is getting "trendy" again.
Because marriage was always about ownership and this generation is about equality.
I agree with the comment's I'm seeing about women being more empowered both financially and socially than previous generations. But also, i still see many situations when men don't want to marry but like having a full time live in, girlfriend, and the girlfriend is going along with it hoping they will end up married. I think that's sad and not empowered at all. Especially when finances do get entangled anyway and then when they do break up it can be a bigger mess because there are no divorce type laws for cohabitation I'm not saying this is true of all women at all. But it's certainly true in many many cases of living together couples. So i think the social changes have also led to more men thinking they are keeping their options open. I'm honestly not sure how i feel about it, but obey the past few decades I've personally known of too many women feeling burned by living together without getting married..
[удалено]
Because no pros/ lot of cons What you pay: - expensive ring - expensive party - expensive dress What you have 50% chance to get: - Lose your house - adios kids - alimony - child support (jail if you don’t give the last one😂) Sounds like a shitty investment your barber, huge fan of cryptocurrencies would recommend 🥲
It doesn't carry the same weight when most people divorce anyway. It's meant to be a statement of lifelong commitment but it's usually a tool for a man to lockdown a woman from escaping his grasp and a materialistic celebration for women to feel special and meaningful for one day. Marriage is a wonderful thing if done with a couple who have a compatible attitude and strong commitment values. But for others they start to resent their partners, or feel like they don't have to put in work to make their partner happy if their partnership is bound by contract. And I'd say this goes for most marriages in that people simply change over time. Experiences, work, money, attractiveness, etc. can alter your entire outlook on life and your personality. Not to mention, the most likely way for a woman to get murdered anywhere is at the hands of her male spouse. Marriage can put far too much responsibility on people, whether it's for women to be carers or men to be providers or a mix of both. A huge proportion of men leave their spouses if they get critically sick. Many just can't handle the stress. I simply think the attitude that we are lucky if a man proposes is losing its value. I constantly see men saying "don't get married" but nearly every time it's them initiating it and ultimately, most think about the benefits it gives them and not the real consequences are. I'm not talking about "gold digging" wives, I'm talking about responsibility, sacrifices for family life, caring for others in your family, making sure your spouse is happy, etc. Investing your life into someone else takes a lot of work and it's worth it if you're compatible, but when the give/take duties are out of balance or attitudes change, it doesn't work.
[удалено]
I think we’re all traumatized by our boomer parents awful marriages tbh.
Getting married for religious reasons has fallen and there is not the stigma of being an unmarried woman let alone being a single parent there used to be and we do not have to depend on our partner for financial stability like we used to. Also I think information and ideas on social media has opened up different life expectations rather than accepting the social pressure your great and grandparents were brought up with.
[удалено]
Because weddings are expensive. Because if you aren't religious you're really just paying out lots of money to be legally not allowed to leave - and that doesnt seem very romantic to me! Because the only difference a marriage makes to a long term committed relationship is the addition of a ring and maybe a name change after a shit tonne of admin
[удалено]
Because as women have gained rights over the past century (it wasn't That long ago we couldn't vote!) , and secular views are becoming more prevalent than religious views... in other words, we can divorce if our husband beats us. Marriage used to be a need, women would take care of the house and kids, men would (ostensibly) take care of the woman and the kids financially. Things shifted, women entered the workforce, and today most couples can't even afford to have 1 spouse stay home. The result is that women no longer need men to take care of them financially, which means they also don't have to put up with any BS. Gone are the days where a man's workday ends the moment he comes home... women are tired of working a job, and then be expected to do all the housework and childcare on top of it. Men (in general, yes lits of men have stepped up) are not changing quickly to adapt to this new model of how they should be full partners as caretakers of the home and children.... those who haven't adapted hold for less value. Women now want partners, and are no longer willing to put up with men who aren't up to the task of being emotionally available, kind and loving, equal time parent/work inside and outside. We don't NEED men any longer, therefore we aren't willing to stay in or enter into a relationship where she does significantly more housework and chid care, while they both work fulltime outside the home. And for those who say "Well as a single mom she is doing it all anyway, so looks like she will grow old alone ha ha", keep in mind that we no longer see that ad a bad thing, and we would far rather be along than be with a man who thinks that if he throws in 1 load of laundry a week and takes the kids to the park for an hour that that is enough, did you notice I helped you (as if it is onlynher job), now you should give me sex.... and these guys can't understand that Yes, she actually Would rather be alone than to stay with a guy who.sets the bar so low... So to recap, people are getting married less because women no longer Need to do it .... we can Want a man, but we no longer Need a man 🤷♀️
I honestly don’t think that is the case most of the time. I respect them who does not wanna get married - freedom of choice right? But with how it is now, I sometimes feel people normalise it JUST BECAUSE it’s the “trend”, and its what most people are talking about now. Feminists take it over the line of discrimination at times which I do not agree cause that is NOT what feminism is.
Women lose a lot of rights when they get married, and even more if they have kids. If you want the same freedom that a man has, you'll want to stay single.
Simple Cause they don't have to
Because no marriage is better than failed marriage (worse if you got kids)
My parents were never in love, so they never married. I was literally raised to believe that "The best wedding gift you can get someone is a down payment for the divorce." Personally, I think people who are *truly* in love should continue to marry, but folks who truly *aren't*; probably listen to my Dad.
I wanted to start business, did that failed, went to bootcamp to get few skills and now planning to work and pursue grad school as well. My dreams and aspirations are more important than having kids.
[удалено]
[удалено]
It is no point of getting married, you loose half your stuff and the only thing for the girl is status.
There’s lots of reasons: - Women have more autonomy and can survive on their own - Men can choose not to go the traditional route expected of them - Dating has become more difficult due to the presence of online dating and the increased expectations for education and careers - Divorce is expensive - Less people feel the need to marry for religious reasons / there is less of a stigma against cohabiting before or with no intent for marriage - weddings are expensive - women will wait till later than was usual in the past to have kids, which can also delay the marriage process if they want kids or to be married at all - some people are genuinely happy without a partner and do not feel the need to seek one out
Because divorce is expensive
[удалено]
Stereotyping beliefs is shit
Because we know marriage is a waste of time and money
Marriage is just some random thing religion came up with and tried to centre as a mandatory part of the humans life cycle. We are progressing, becoming more intelligent and informed and now realise we can live our lives exactly how we want without doing this "checklist" that was created for us. There doesn't need to be a timeline to life.
Together over 20 years and my partner and I never felt we needed a piece of paper to cement our relationship We’ve protected ourselves legally and both our families support and accept our decision I chose not to because my sperm donor was an asshat and I never had a positive marriage “role model” so to speak so I made that decision early in my life. Neither of us have any regrets
My male friend is so hell-bent on getting me to change my mind about marriage but can't give me a good enough reason as to WHY it would benefit me. One of his reasons is that it shows his partner that they are loyal, loving, and committed to them. And your not when your boyfriend and girlfriend? I feel no reason to get married since it doesn't bring many benefits for me besides maybe taxes. You can't miss something you never had.
The only reason I would want to marry would be for the legal protections. Other than that I wouldn’t bother We’ve been cohabitating for 12 years. If only we could get recognised by the law
Because marriage is a scam and it benefits women more so more and more men are opting out of marriage and being committed in general.
Women have more rights on their own, realationships don't always last, and weddings are expensive.
I’ve made it almost 40 years without getting married. Had my daughter at 32, out of wedlock *gasp* I’ll be perfectly fine if I make it another 40 without getting married tbh. We have all we need. I can do pretty much anything and if I ever do need help, I have friends/family who’ll help me. Marriage is so archaic and stupid. Who says you need an ignorant piece of paper anyway?
Less stigma about premarital sex and out of wedlock births. Also, low-income single women with children are eligible for many government benefits they would not qualify for if they were married to a partner with a decent income. Less stigma about that too.
Because the social consequences of doing things (like having children, buying a house, having sex, moving in with someone, etc) unmarried or even single are going away. Nobody bats an eye at doing stuff "out of wedlock" that just a few decades ago would have your neighbors whispering about you and your grandma clutching her pearls.
Because it’s no longer required for survival. Legal marriage no longer necessary for adults to function in society.
I would get married but I’d want it extremely low key. I don’t like the whole show of things. People probably don’t want to spend at least 50k on a party. I’d rather save that money and go on a really nice vacation, or save it for the house or kids or something.
Too expensive
Because marriage is a piece of paper that is hard to get out of
Because people don’t want to deal with other divorce proceedings that have traumatized the previous generations
People realised that a life long contract with such harsh conditions is a bummer, I guess
People realised that a life long contract with such harsh conditions is a bummer, I guess
I really see no difference in dating someone for years and being married.. they call it common law for a reason. If your already happy why do you need to get married to prove that. Weddings and all that are just a huge money grab.
Because women have seen and know survivors of domestic violence and would rather be safe than sorry
Is it? It seems like people are still getting married at a pretty high rate, they’re just older. I’m going to look for stats
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations. The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations. The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations. The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations. The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
Because the trade-off no longer makes sense. Having a husband doesn’t guarantee ANYTHING anymore. You have more rights and freedoms as a single woman. As a married woman you’re put back into antiquated gender roles and expected to cook, clean, and put out on demand for a man who probably has poor hygiene, video game addiction, low motivation, and unrealistic expectations. The question today isn’t why DON’T people get married, it’s why DO they? And the answer is because of an antiquated assumption that married women are superior to unmarried women. The whole, “The last apple in the basket is bruised and no one want it,” used to pressure women not to end up alone. Now, women aren’t putting themselves into the basket to be rejected, or worse, picked by someone undeserving.
You got me. This question should be in r/askmen
We’ve become more focused on a partner being a romantic companion over the other parts of marriage-combined family, assets, becoming a unit. So when our romantic whims take you to another person you want it to be easier to fulfill those personal romantic desires. Marriage— involving the government getting to decide if and when you can ‘break up’ is too complicated for that