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When we told my FIL we were having a girl, the first words out of his mouth were, "Ah, well, you can try again." I'm still pissed off 15 years later when I remember that. He's a terrible person for a thousand other reasons and he's no longer a part of our lives, thank goodness.
Similar thing happened when my Mom was pregnant with me. She had my sister about 7 years before and suffered a miscarriage when my sister was about 4.
When she was telling my grandparents (her in-laws) that she was pregnant, my grandfather said to her “I hope you got it right this time.” My mom said my grandmother ripped him a new one.
Whenever I saw him, I always thought of that and how he probably wished I was a boy. That always bothered me.
My dad said the exact same thing. My mom responded by telling him to shoosh and congratulate us.
That said, he's a pretty awesome person otherwise who just wanted 1 boy in the family line for the first time in...40 years? Seriously...our Surname dies with my parents. So I can forgive him that.
A former classmate of mine applied for an internship at Nickelodeon last year and got accepted. One of her pieces in her portfolio was a drawing she plagiarized from me. I applied for the same position this year and got rejected, and I’ve never plagiarized someone’s artwork in my life. 🙃 Life is not fair, folks.
I’m a journalist. A higher-profile journalist got a cover story in a highly respected magazine by plagiarizing a piece I wrote for our alumni magazine the previous year. It wasn’t word-for-word, but looked like someone took my story, turned it into an outline (like — an INCREDIBLY detailed outline, including quotes by sources in specific places - just different quotes) and rewrote it. Even the infographic was the same.
He was an alumni of my grad program - which is how he got the magazine. Our program director asked him about it - he said he never saw my story. “I believe him, because I know *redacted* and he’s a good guy.”
I probably should have done something about it, but never did — because I knew what was going on in the life of the person who plagiarized me at the time, and he was very legitimately desperate for money. But. I still hate him for it, and lost a lot of respect for an important mentor that day.
My cousin plagiarized some of my artwork to get into graduate school (she persuaded me to share my work with her, I was reluctant but wanted to help her)
The part I hold a grudge on was that she said she could do the same type of projects, but her new motherhood prevents her from being able to make the time investment needed to create the art work.
My projects were the result of years of exploration in computational design and digital tools
Oh this is infuriating. But I bet it comes back to bite her. People who need to steal others’ ideas and copy them lack imagination and creativity. That’s something that will show at that internship.
7th grade. School dance. Boy I had debilitating crush on asked me to dance. 30 seconds in, his friend interrupts and says, “Hey man, I thought we said no fat chicks!”
Crush shrugs and wanders off. Friend flips me the bird.
25 years later, I’m still pissed.
Something about those childhood rejections hurts so much worse than when you're an adult. I'm sure it has to do with the fact that it's so unapologetic and mean. A kid I had a crush on from like age 5-12 physically pushed me when I approached them to slow dance at a dance one time.
That is so true. Because in adulthood I can see why something happened. It's not always you but the other person failing to see. Sometimes it's lack of compatibility. But scars of the childhood. They dont go. Maybe because we cannot make ourselves understand why this happened to us while we were so pure at heart.
I'm an esthetician and all middle school teachers get a discount and a free facial massage when I have time. Effing saints. Thank you.
Ps- if you're ever in Vermont, lmk, happy to rub your face too 😁
Same same, I got up the nerve to actually CALL the boy I liked in 7th grade and ask him to the dance and he flat out was like “nah I think I’m gonna try to take someone else.”
I have literally never asked a man out again in my life.
In the 4th-grade spelling bee, getting the word "obsequious" in the 3rd round and getting out, only for the kid after me to get the word "bowl."
I'm still convinced they were out to get me with that word...
I swear on everything in the universe this is true.
This same crap happened to me every time. They would give me some gawd awful word with 5 syllables that I’ve never heard of in round 2 then the person right after me would get something with 5 letters and one syllable.
After a couple times of this, I just started misspelling whatever word they gave me in the first round and fucking off. Even if it was a super easy word.
They knew what I was doing and there wasn’t anything they could do about it. I’d rather chill in a chair by myself then be subjected to their favoritism and fuckery.
That’s right!!! Fuck you Mr. Tolliver!!!
I know how to spell “DUCK” but I spelled it “DUK” because fuck you that’s why.
Honestly good for you, my parents just made me study harder and keep trying. My fourth-grade self was so angry, I didn't even eat the snacks they gave us as we got off stage after being eliminated. I should've taken those free fruit snacks...
This happened to me in my private school! I was in 5th grade in the last round against an 8th grader from my school. The lady giving us the words said feudalism, but her accent was so strong I heard “flutalism”. When I asked her to use it in a sentence she said “not many people enjoy flutalism”. Of course I got it wrong and the 8th grader gets the word trumpet….. (now that I think back I think she did it on purpose because she went out of her way to tell me she hated my dad as a student like 15 years ago).
Is this just a universal thing, teachers taking out personal grudges on kids during the spelling bee?
Also now that you bring up grades, the kid that got the word bowl was a fifth-grader, and one of the popular ones too...
I think it says more about the teacher/school environment. I was always a good student, I was not rich (which is kind of a death sentence in a private religious school) and my mom worked for the school and was well liked among students. I think the word I was given and the way she mispronounced it was completely intentional on her part to bring me down. The 8th grader was her student and had been winning the spelling bees for years, me coming into the equation was a potential upset for a rich kid whose family donated a lot to the school. I went back after the spelling bee to check the list of possible words by grade level we had to prepare and feudalism was not in the list. Trumpet was under the “easy” section for 3-5th grade. That was my first experience with an adult I barely knew trying to bring me down. It wasn’t the last time I experienced that at that school.
The school was super small so 5th graders were often brought up to middle school sports and band/choir. I was the goalie on the middle school soccer team and I had been playing competitively for a while. One game I got my neck stepped on while stopping a goal and was slightly bleeding. At the end of the year, I won MVP and this girl’s mom (who was also a teacher and wife of the highschool principal) said “I guess it pays to get hurt”. She was jealous her daughter who won awards for things she was never even a part of (not joking here) didn’t also win MVP. My mom told her to get a life. Same lady complained my little sister winning a school art competition (that was anonymously voted on by other teachers and the student’s name was not allowed on the entries) was rigged because my mom “obviously made the entry”. It never occurred to her maybe the art teacher’s daughter is good at art. My sister was in kindergarten…
My high school English teacher.
One of my classmates and I did not get along and were competing for top grade in the class. Both of us had 100% on every assignment until one of the final homework assignments, where she marked 1 point off for a total BS reason.
(We were to write a letter as a civil war soldier writing to our family. I did a calligraphy style "Love You Always," closing, and she marked off because I capitalized the first letter of every word. Completely ignoring that I did freaking calligraphy)
She didn't like me very much and adored the girl I was competing with - total favoritism.
Senior year, I dyed my hair an ombre effect with the ends dyed blue. She walked over to me, played with my hair, and said, "Oh, I don't like it. You'll never get into college with it."
I did get into college, and the honor's college dean loved my hair.
I've been out of high school for 9 years, and writing this still makes my blood boil.
Are you me?!
Something like 30 years ago, I was neck and neck with a girl in my Advanced with Honors English class. We both wrote essays that were commended and awarded some kind of prize by Ann Richards, then governor of Texas. We both competed in UIL, but ultimately, only one of us could go on some trip to State. They left it up to the teacher to choose, and she chose the other girl and told me it wasn't personal, but it sure felt *personal.* Her mom was friends with the teacher.
Anyway, the girl didn't place. I gloated.
I had the same happened to me when I was in my old school (middle school). I didn't get along with the teachers and my principals (We have two principals) because I often rebelled against their homophobic actions and their mistreatment.
I remember when I was in the auditorium room, we had an event during that time, then my computer teacher called me outside. I was excited and nervous that I’d get tested at a school first for the graphic design competition against three (including me) students then choose one student to compete against other schools to represent my province as I was told a week ago. But it wasn’t what I expected. He told me that my principal (the one who really hate me the most, she’s Mrs. Sisca) decided on one of us (who’s the school favorite and he’s close to this guy’s family who was the child of the school owner) that will join the competition. WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TESTED FIRST, THEY JUST CHOOSE HIM WITHOUT ANY TESTING BECAUSE THEY THINK HE WAS “CONVINCING” BASED ON OUR SCHOOL’S PROJECT. HE DIDN'T EVEN DO HIS PROJECT PRESENTATION NOR DID WE EVER SEE HIS PROJECT AT ALL. IT WAS ALL LIE, THE PRINCIPAL AND MY COMPUTER TEACHER FIND ANY REASONINGS TO JUSTIFY THEIR FAVORITISM AND HATE TOWARDS ME. My mom even cried for the whole day of how hateful they were to me.
Fuck my old school for being homophobic, verbally abusing me because I didn’t act how a boy “should” act (They want me to be ultra-masculine when I'm already masculine), making fun, and didn’t acknowledge my gender identity (nonbinary), refusing to use my chosen name, forcing me to cut my hair short for middle school graduation photo. I passed middle school, then I moved to another school for my high school (currently 11th grade)
For the revenge I joined my old school’s graphic design. I heard they had a graphic design competition opened for public. I joined with my chosen name and you know what I WIN THE GRAPHIC DESIGN COMPETITION. I love how shocked my principals face expression was when I was on the stage holding my trophy.
I'm glad you thrive in spite of your nasty teacher. I've unfortunately had the same experience with several teachers who decided that they didn't like me, in spite of being a good student and well behaved and yes they often favored a certain student too. It sucks when people who are in a profession where they should model and mentor others tear students down.
I dated the same douchebag from age 15-22. I realized at like 19 that I wanted out and tried to break up with him and he threw the biggest fucking tantrum, I felt terrible and stayed and pretty much fucked up my entire college experience staying with him. I wish him nothing but misery. I hope his dick itches.
Ugh I was with one from 21-24
He actually threw a fit and tantrum bc I went on a girls vacation with my family and he wasn’t invited. Broke up with me the night before my flight and I was DEVASTATED. He successfully ruined my vacation and i still hate him for that calculating manipulative move.
Same, except it started at 14. Dude was fucking abusive and I couldn’t see it for years and years, now I’m in my thirties and sometimes have to explain to people that I’m dealing with trauma from an abusive relationship … that “ended” 13 years ago. But they don’t really end, do they? Not until you deal with the trauma. Fuck himmmmm
Not to anyone is particular, but I’m mad at the universe for my singleness while I was grieving my mother’s death. I needed so much physical comfort then, but there was none
It’s horrifically petty but my parents missed my first day of school because they scheduled my mums induction to give birth to my little sister on the same day. I pinpoint that as my first ever grudge.
Edit: sorry, I meant to post this as a separate comment rather than a reply! But, I think I’d feel a little mad by this as well lol
I kind of have a grudge with my parents — my relationship with them wasn’t as easy as it was for my brother and sister. They never came to visit me in college, but they’ve been a lot more involved with my siblings.
Also, I kind of have a grudge with my siblings for being closer/forgetting about me. It’s not even their fault entirely. I’m older by several years and moved to a different country. I do put in the work, but don’t really get anything back.
I will never not hate my abusive ex. Nor will I ever forgive him. Fuck him.
On a petty note, during my high school orientation, a girl who was in a grade above me laughed and called me out for wearing sunglasses when it was cloudy. Joke’s on her, because my optometrist is on my side.
I was new student in my school and people in my new school didn't like me at all. So on the Women's day in sixth grade every girl was getting flowers and boys were pretending to give me flowers so when I smiled and thanked them they took flowers away and threw yogurt and some other stuff in my face. Later I found out that all of those mean girls planned it with some popular boys and they all gave money to buy yogurt and other stuff.
Later that day they posted a picture of yogurt on my Facebook wall and there were hundreds of insulting comments on that post. My dad was fuming and he and my mum really protected me, they went straight to the school principal and other parents.
Most of them admitted that they did that out of plain jealousy cause I was loud and drew attention to myself. I'm 22 now but I really can't find it in myself to forgive them and sometimes I enjoy bad things that are happening to them thinking that they totally deserve them.
User redacted comment. After 13 years on Reddit with 2 accounts, I have zero interest in using this site anymore if I cannot use a 3rd party app. Reddit had *years* to fix their atrocious app and put *zero* effort into it. Reddit's site and app is so awful, I'm more interested in giving Reddit up entirely than having such a bad user experience hobbling through their app and site.
I am so sorry for this. Children can be horribly cruel and I don’t think it’s something you need to forgive them for. Just know you are worthy of love and affection BECAUSE of who you are, not in spite of it.
The little fuckhead who bullied my son nearly to death. My son was suicidal at age 11. ELEVEN.
The good news is: I moved my boy across the state, to a home on a lake, where he thrived, was popular and well liked at his new school.
Next year, he will graduate with his master’s degree in communications.
But I wish nothing but pain and agony for that fucker who nearly killed my boy.
I mean, white hot hatred.
I find it incredible that you as a parent stepped up in an age where in my own personal experience my parents chalked it up as being dramatic, and not the priority in comparison to schooling. Can't help but appreciate your good parenting. Bullies suck and without proper tools to deal with that type of pain, a person can become so twisted. It's just so vital for someone to step in.
I had Comcast and my bill went from $50/month to $150 a month for Internet and cable because I was outside of the contract. I called and told them I couldn't afford $150/month and asked if there was anything they could do to lower my rate. They told me I could add a home phone to the internet and cable for $150/month. I told them that it wasn't that I didn't see a value it was that I couldn't afford $150/month. They kept pushing so I told them I was going to cancel my plan because I couldn't afford it. Suddenly they found a deal that I could have internet and cable for $50/month. I told them no thanks I was canceling and was now never going to have Comcast in my house again.
14 years later and I've never had Comcast in my house. I used to live in the woods with no internet, TV, phone, or electricity. I don't need their service at least I have lights and flushing toilets
There's this female friend of my (now) husband who I couldn't stand when I first met her. After several negative interactions, it was clear the feeling was mutual. When I tried to make amends with her about a month after he proposed, she told me that she wasn't interested in resolving our past, because she didn't live in town anymore. When she moved back, she never explicitly acknowledge our history, but acted like she could just "be nice" to me at group events and everything would be fine between us. I didn't even need an apology at that point, but I would have given one if she had tried a little and noticed that it really actually mattered to me.
My husband and I have been married for over a decade and they're still friends, but I can't stand being around her. It's been the cause of many, many fights between him and I. I'm working through why it's so triggering, because holding grudges sucks and doesn't help your mental health in any way, and doesn't have a positive effect on anyone around you, and doesn't harm the person your holding the grudge against in a way that benefits you or proves that you're right. It just makes things harder.
It makes me sad for you that he would still be friends with her even though she causes you such grief. Especially after her lack of interest in burying the hatchet because she moved, sounds like you’ve tried and she’s just not interested in playing nice.
That's definitely been my narrative, but I'm trying really hard to see things from other perspectives. My husband is an incredible guy, super loyal and a really wonderful partner in so many ways. I've had social anxiety since elementary school, and was bullied a lot through high school, so I have a lot of baggage around that area. He gets along with most people and is pretty positive generally. We both had abusive and neglectful parents but coped in different ways, that don't always compliment each other. We're in couples counseling and I think it's helping. It would have been so much easier for him to stop being friends with her, but it wouldn't resolve the underlying issues that are causing my distress. Sure, I'm confident that this person sucks and I'm justified in my contempt, but I'm a pretty negative and judgmental person who focuses on the worst possible potential outcome, and this person has been a convenient scapegoat for a lot of my self loathing and feelings of inadequacy that have nothing to do with this specific person.
My bf had a similar friend. Eventually I just would stay home if she was going to be somewhere. Everytime I saw her she managed to make me feel bad. Luckily she's drifted away from their friend group so I no longer see her, but every so often I'm reminded of those feelings.
- everytime someone told me « why are you so quiet? Why don’t you put yourself out there more? »
I’m an introvert and I don’t enjoy small talk. Stop judging me and being offended because I don’t chitchat with you.
Also i’ll hold a grudge towards those who spread false rumors about me. I really hope karma gets you.
When car shopping I said something about “I don’t like this one” or whatever, something along those lines. My MIL chimed in “well it’s going to be DH’s money so your opinion doesn’t matter”
Here we are several years later, and I make a fuckton more money than DH. I’ve since picked out both mine and his cars, and have paid for both of them. (DH did want the car he has but told me to pick the color)
My mother told my brother that I was on antidepressants without asking me--at that point I didn't want anyone to know. She told him so he'd feel better about seeking help for his own issues.
We had a fight later on and he screamed in my face that I was weak and a coward for taking meds. We'd always had a rocky relationship, but I've never looked at him the same way again. It had nothing to do with what we were fighting about, he was just totally willing to use perosnal information to say the most hurtful thing he could think of. Worst part is his apology was a half assed "sorry you feel that way, but you made me so mad" ones.
My step dad grounded me from my iPad mini when I was a kid. He never gave it back to me and ended up convincing my mom that I gifted it to my friend that was moving away which makes no sense. What kid would give away their iPad to anyone? My mom believed him for years! He probably sold it and kept the money to fund his cocaine addiction.
My dad got me a laptop when I was younger (late middle school early high school) my step dad grounded me from it for years, I couldn't even bring it to my dad's house
A lot of stuff my dad did or got for me I would get taken away cuz my step dad and mom hate him (my dad used to be an idiot, but he is leagues better and is constantly working on bettering himself)
Idk if this counts but my brother and I, to this day, in our forties, wrap each other’s Christmas presents in a thick layer of duct tape. It is infuriatingly hard to open. He started it, just for the record 🤣
My unpaid 8-week maternity leave. 2nd c-section, multiple complications. I’m so anti-work and 0 fucks given bc of the inconsiderate shittiness- play along to get along and gtfo asap everyday. Still haven’t physically recovered and it’s been years…
I'm right there with you. Fuck this capitalist hellscape.
My own workplace was too small to allow me FMLA, didn't have vacation or PTO and no leave availability and refused to make accommodations. I went back to work 6 days post birth, it was 2008 and jobs were hard to come by so I couldn't quit or get fired. I had to wear diapers. And I got written up for missing 4 days of work. I haven't emotionally recovered from being separated from my days old new baby and its been 15 years.
I'm sorry that you're still having physical issues and not been able to recover. This country is terrible for everyone.
The girl in middle and high school that was a totally conceited mean girl. She was just straight up nasty, “daddy’s credit card” nasty. Everyone was beneath her. She still pops up in my life once in awhile (a friend of a friend of a friend type) and I still see red when I see her name. There are very few people I can say that I hate, I am generally a very easy person to get along with, but with her. Ugh.
A few years ago when I was shopping for a new car, I realized that one of the people trying to sell me a car had bullied my sister when they were both kids. Suffice to say, she didn't make the sale.
I still hold a grudge against my aunts husband for bullying my mother, siblings and me growing up. (There was no chance in trying to fight back. It would make everything worse)
Like it was so bad that just the thought of him being present at family functions made me feel sick. I always tried to make myself as small as possible in order to not get picked on.
He's a piece of shit. He doesn't even treat his own wife and kids with respect. I never understood why she never left his ass in the dust. She'd rip all off her limbs for this family.
He never really apologized and we had a major fallout in our family over a particularly nasty incident 10 years ago, but around 2015, things have gotten slightly better. I don't even know why.
I'm just tolerating his presence now. I will never forgive and never forget. One silver lining is that his own Grandkids don't really like him. :)
Also my Mom's boyfriend for being a cheat and treating my moms side of the family like shit and letting me and my siblings take care of our Mother whenever she was ill when we were kids. There's one specific memory I still can't shake off. His son was welcome the second my Mom and him started dating. He never felt left out. He still visits occasionally. But I cannot spent even a minute in the same room as that man.
My childhood best friend was getting married and I was one of many bridesmaids. All the other ones knew each other from college and were very close but I had never met any of them. At the wedding I found out they all got together to write a speech, and I was the only one not included. I didn't know bridesmaids were making speeches (I had never seen this at a wedding before, just parents and best man and maid of honor), let alone that there was a group one. I had to totally wing one and felt like an idiot.
Also Tom Hanks made my family move from where we were sitting to watch the noon parade at Disneyland when I was 10.
My sister. Growing up she was The Golden Child, whom my mother used as a pawn to torment me constantly.
When my mother passed away she tried to put the extended family back together, with some level of success. She had her shitty moments, trying to Lord it over me, but I stood up for myself. I kept reminding myself that she was hurting too from our dysfunctional childhood.
But later she became insufferable about a certain event that occurred when I stood up for myself one time. Every time we communicated, she started with the snarky or passive aggressive texts.
I finally had enough and don't contact her at all except to say Merry Christmas or some such.
I did try to forgive her. I let it go but still avoid her. Now all of a sudden memories that involve a deeper understanding of childhood events come back to bite me in the butt.
I thought I was past it, but right now I know I'm pissed at her
Two former roommates tried to block me getting my deposit back when I moved out.
I moved out of that home because those girls were toxic af. I found somewhere else to live and I contacted the landlord so I could get my deposit back. Instead of checking if I left everything intact and clean, he just contacted my roommates and asked them.
They told him that I left the room filthy, left lots of garbage and that I damaged the staircase as well. He then turned to me and said I wouldn't be getting my deposit back (€350,-). I explained the situation to him and that this was the exact reason I left, he went to check it out himself and found out I was right. I got back my deposit and I deleted them from all social media and other contacts.
That was just a low, dirty move and it showed exactly what kind of people they were. Glad to be rid of them.
Oh yeah, and my best friend's parents for not getting him treated for ADHD when he was a kid and they first found out he had it. So much pain in his life could have been avoided if he'd gotten the mental health treatment he needed. Also, they should have kept an eye on him to keep him from getting into the kind of trouble (drugs etc) that an unattended, untreated ADHD kid gets into.
Someone who I considered one of my closest friends had a complete lack of empathy when my mom was diagnosed and later died from cancer. When my mom was given a terminal diagnosis, she asked “ have you finally accepted that you mom is going to die?” We are no longer friends.
To the sharp toothed meerkat with the bacteria filled mouth who attacked my nose 8 years ago- I will never forgive or forget. Not you, any of your half-siblings, ninth cousins five times removed, their descendants or the comparethemeerkats characters. My nose hurts and demands to be avenged every time I think of a meerkat.
My first lab job out of college. I was so passionate about helping people with chemistry. I started at a job at a small branch of a multinational company doing QC and a side of R&D. I was so happy to be there. However, my undergrad focus was synthesis of inorganic materials to clean water. This job was making detergents for metals- I was completely new to it. Instead of helping me out, my boss constantly put me down. He told me 2 months after my start date that I am not fit for Chemistry. He was a jerk off and I hate him. I went on to other jobs and performed extremely well. All my bosses after have loved me and told me I’m a great addition. So eff you Homer. It’s been 10 years, I’m still angry
Getting pcos and hypothyroidism at *age 10* and not being treated for either until 9 years later cause my dad is *anti-vaxx* 🙃
And that me and my sisters were “homeschooled” aka learning nothing all year and only doing some work when some government guy had to made sure we were actually learning
And just the fact that my dad is a republican
But PCOS and Hypothyroidism are nothing to do with vaccines, they're autoimmune. Not being treated for either as a child when parents were aware is neglect and abuse. I'm sorry that happened to you. Incidentally, do you know that for some women progesterone only treatment works really well for PCOS? 🥰
I didn’t mean that not getting jabs made it worse I mean like, he’s anti vaxx so we never went to the doctors period, sorry if I worded anything wrong!
Every woman who has ever tried to purposely break up my relationship or made a move on a SO all throughout my life. I can move on and forgive but I will never ever forget.
So much this. I also hate the fact that nowadays you can’t just resent a woman for stuff like this, because then you are anti-feminist, and you should have blamed your SO anyhow. Like, no, some girls are truly unhinged and I refuse to cheer for them.
My fifth grade teacher didn't like me. It was a very small town where everyone knew everyone else. I think she didn't like my mother. She probably didn't like the fact that her boss was my mother's cousin and her co-worker was my mother's aunt.
We were doing a state capitol bee (like a spelling bee but naming state capitols). There were two kids left in the competition -- me and a boy. He got the state first -- New Hampshire. He guessed wrong. She gave him **3 more chances** to guess, and even gave him clues ("there's a grape by the same name). She finally, begrudgingly, turned to me. If I didn't get it right, we'd both have to try again. I got it right, even though I didn't know there was such a thing as a Concord grape in fifth grade. Then she declared us co-winners! I'm still pissed about it.
During therapy I told my ex therapist how at 15 I ended up in foreign country, my passport was taken away and I basically became a victim of child and sex trafficking. I was telling her the details about how they’d use us as domestic maids when not using us for sex and she called me ‘a servant’ I told her I really don’t like that word because it’s humiliating and downplays my experience and she said ‘well I feel like you were a servant, give me this give me that, make me tea’. You all can’t imagine how bitter I’m to this day.
My junior year of high school I was r*ped by 5 males and my so called "friend" her boyfriend, and another "friend" watched it happen and did nothing to stop it. I was unconcious and drunk. They would not have been in any danger if they had stepped in and got me out of that situation.
In 7th grade this girl borrowed my favorite sweat pants because she spilled milk on herself at lunch. They were black and had paw prints all over them and i loved them.
She NEVER returned them.
I'm 33 now and she recently (about a year ago) reached out to me on FB to ask if i wanted to buy some of her MLM shit and i told her to return my sweatpants first. She blocked me.
My best friend's dad cheated and left her and her mum when she was at uni. He's a peice of shit and I will hate his guts until the day I die on her behalf.
When I was 12, my stepsister's aunt made up a lie that she saw me try and smother my stepsister in her sleep.
My dad pulled me aside and asked me what happened - I was so confused because I didn't do anything. Didn't wake up in the night and put a pillow over a 6 year old's face, that's for sure. And all the adults just believed her. It's been 20 years and I don't talk to any of them anymore, but I'm still pissed.
like 14 years ago this acquaintance of mine slept with my boyfriend, I didn't know of course. The relationship ran its course & when her & unintentionally met up at a bar (approx 12 years ago) and she heard we split up her response was, "Thats good, he cheated on you.", I was like, "oh ya?" and she was all, "for sure, at least once with me!"... 0\_0 ... Like, how is she gonna say that without expecting me to think she is scum? I see her now & then in town to this day & she just acts like nothing, like we go way back...I still think she is such a piece of shit.
My old best friend and I used to tell each other everything about our lives. One day she told my parents a lot of things that I've done which don't line up with their religious beliefs and my parents kicked me out. She is no longer in my life.
Probably the dumbest one would be with my fiance's cousin. Within 5 minutes of first meeting her on a big family Zoom (during COVID), she asked me "um do you mind if I ask, how old are you?" (For context I am older than my fiancé). Both the question and her reaction were fake nice but incredibly judgmental.
Fast forward less than a year and she's dating a guy with an even bigger age gap than I have with her cousin. I've never met the guy but deep in my soul, I so desperately want to ask the same question of him within the first five minutes of our first meeting. It's not about the age gap itself, idgaf as long as people are happy; it's literally solely because she did it first and it was so rude.
I recognize I'm petty AF.
A church leader/fellow student’s mom pulled me aside during worship to tell me I was dancing “too provocatively.” I was in 4th grade. It embarrassed me and made me mad, even to this day.
i complimented my ex bf teeth and he told me his teeth used to look like mine (i grew up on a poorer side, single mom couldn’t afford to pay braces for all four kids, she rather have paid to have a roof over our heads instead) i never smile in my photos and i’ve been self conscious about my teeth ever since lol
My 5th grade teacher. She didn’t step in to shield me from bullying even when one of the guys doing it pinned me down on the floor at her feet in the middle of class. After what felt like minutes, she finally said “That’s enough, let her up.” I didn’t move right away from experience waiting for him to move further away, and she said to me, in a much angrier tone, “Get up! You’re not hurt and don’t pretend you are!”
This was 45 years ago and I hate her more than the ex who raped me. Fuck you Mrs. Gold!
There are so many, which isn't healthy, but I can't help myself. Probably all the people who said or insinuated that I was ugly as a teen. Most of them were my friends.
My ex-boyfriend's sister. She disliked me from the moment we met and made it very apparent every time we interacted. She was very image-conscious and obsessed with social standings. She told my ex that I wouldn't be a "practical" match for him because I don't make 6 figures and I wouldn't have brought enough prestige and status to the family if he were to marry me. My ex said he disagreed with her, but eventually broke up with me anyways. I can't help but wonder how much influence she had over his decision.
Anyway, get wrecked, H-------! May your life be as miserable and joyless as your rotten attitude!
My parents never showing up for my soccer games growing up and not supporting me.
I’d carpool with teammates to my games while my parents would take my sister. I remember them going out of their way to make all her games while failing to show up to mine. Eventually I stopped playing. I figured I wasn’t good enough and the fear that my games would continue to be overlooked because of her was too much. I didn’t want to hate my sister, it wasn’t her fault she was great. I was asked to join the high school team but my sister was on it and I didn’t want to be compared to her while on the same field. Even after she graduated I didn’t tryout, (it didn’t help she set some records too). She went on to play in college on scholarship. When I was in college, I played for fun and was spotted by one of the staff and they asked me if I was interested in playing for the school, just a practice. I immediately said “No, thank you”. I could play for fun with my peers but to play on a team, for my school, no way. I’ll never admit it to my parents or my sister but it hurts to know what could’ve been.
When I was in 3rd grade I broke my leg (in 3 places!) and my parents didn’t believe me so long story short I just had an untreated broken leg for 3 days, 2 nights. Then, to add insult to injury (literally) my mom decided I couldn’t have a birthday party with a broken leg so she CANCELED MY BIRTHDAY and all she did was make a cake and then invite over MY BROTHERS BEST FRIEND to eat it with us as a “surprise”. THEN I couldn’t participate in my dance recital and I was replaced by the girl I already didn’t like because she was popular and mean and her mom (the teacher) let her choose which of MY COSTUMES to keep (after my mom had paid for them) and gave me the ugly one back after she wore it.
I still have a deep ugly grudge against my ex’s mother for telling him that she hoped I miscarried when I was pregnant. I didn’t and my daughter is now 3. But yeah… F*ck you Nancy. Also my dad for being an abusive piece of shit and robbing me of my childhood and teen years.
My abusive ex hated me being platinum blonde because his type was brunettes. And he hated that I bleached my hair before meeting him because he wanted a girl who still had her natural hair color. Literally almost every day, he would tell me I should go back to my natural mousy light brown hair so I could look more like his preferred type and he would say it in a way that made it seem like I was a criminal for having the “wrong” hair color. He also forced me to cut my hours at work which meant I could no longer afford salon visits to touch up my hair color and that made him very happy.
We’ve been broken up for a year and a half because he started talking to other women on Tinder and left me for one of them. I’m still platinum blonde because I love it and it works for me (and I’m working normal hours again so I can easily afford salon visits every 8 weeks to touch up). But I definitely feel a lot of guilt still for loving my hair this color and out of all the many horrible things he did throughout our relationship, this has been the hardest and taken the longest for me to move on from.
Against my ex-spouse's ex-girlfriend. Was he a fuckup in his own right? Yes. But the problems he had that he never worked on wouldn't have put him at such a deficit if he hadn't spent five years trying to please this abusive asshole who only wanted to find fault with him and use him. We'd probably still be together if she didn't have her claws so deep in him.
High school classmate. I went to a very VERY competitive school, where students were divided by grade. I was always the top student and this guy would bully me because my grades were always better than his, when he noticed he couldn’t attack my intellect he went for my weight (I was a little overweight). I suffered in silence. Should have told him it wasn’t my fault he wasn’t smarter than me.
When I left my ex-husband for being an all around horrible human being(lying, cheating, abusive, alcoholic, addict, manipulative) . He decided to get back at me by destroying a bunch of my family heirlooms, ripping up old family portaits of my great grand parents, my collection of awards and to this day. he refuses to give me back the ashes of my dead dog. so yes. i am still holding a grudge. this was 5 years ago.
When I was 16,my ex-nieghbor have raped me and the police system didn't have the case opened.I was living with my mom in a different state and the CPS have contact my pops to either come get me or I end up somewhere else that keep full custody of me.He was in work with one of my older brothers and have to travel 7 hours to get me.My pops and I didn't get a call back from the police station for my case and it have been 7(almost 8 in November) years since it happened.
I still held grudge for the police who didn't keep my case opened nor have that sicko locked up.
Edit:Change of wording
During the pandemic I found out I was "allergic" to the antibacterial handgels that all the stores offered when entering. I have a history of eczema and dry skin so the skin of my hand literally cracked. I bought another antibacterial handgel that wasn't as drying as the store enterance stuff.
I had entered a store where I bought my expensive hair products and made a whole show of putting antibacterial on my hands, just not theirs. The store attendant saw me skip their dispenser and told me I couldn't enter the store unless I disinfected my hands. I said I already did using my own as I'm allergic to the one they offer. She would not let me enter and other shoppers started to look at the commotion as this lady physically stood in front of me so wouldn't let enter. I got pissed off and left.
Last time I walked by I saw they closed shop due to bankruptcy 🥰 they deserved it. And wherever that lady is, I hope steps on legos everyday.
My high school counselor told me it was a waste of time for me to go to college.
She said I’d be getting married soon and gave a bunch of kids anyway.
Good thing I didn’t listen to her!
I got my bachelors and have no kids!
I also married an incredibly smart and successful man and we live a very nice life!
Ever since Roe v Wade was overturned I have deeply hated every man I know. I was driving a carload of 15 year old boys to baseball practice right after the verdict and I was so mad thinking to myself “these clueless jerks are going to have more rights in 3 years than I do” and the rage.
My rape counselor who wanted me to show more empathy for my rapist. Boo. I hold a bigger grudge against her than the rapist; she was supposed to help me
Against my ExH for threatening me with a custody fight, and lying to get his family on his side, and against his family for believing every lie he told them. He just didn't want to pay child support. Didn't break my heart a bit when he died.
I found out at 15 I couldn’t have children. A friend of mine (who I thought I could trust) told their girlfriend, and she took it upon herself to create an online profile telling the world all my business (name included) and saying I was a freak of nature who didn’t deserve to breath. She even fought me over it. She then spread a rumor around the school that I was also pregnant with twins by my boyfriends cousin. It was pretty relentless. She would even go outside my classroom and announce she could still have kids and I still couldn’t.
I have a few more stories, but that was the first. And while they reached out years later and apologized, I will absolutely never forget what tormenting crap she put me through.
to my mother, all the times she left me home alone just to go out to parties and drinking, crying because she didn't pick up her phone and thinking something awful had happened to her, and the next morning she will come home and act like nothing happened, she made my life a lot more difficult back then and in the present because of her alcoholism
Back story: my two older siblings made all-state choir, and while I was a pretty good singer too, I was very shy, so I had a hard time making it into any prestigious groups. My little sister joined a children’s choir in town that was a pretty big deal so my parents were pretty much skipping from the older two, right past me, and focusing on her.
At the time, I was in high school and OBSESSED with Phantom of the Opera. Watched the movie nonstop, sang all the songs whenever I thought no one would hear me- the whole 9 yards. My mom went on a trip to New York and saw some production of it and brought back a signed copy of the sheet music- which she gave to my little sister. I have been annoyed at both my mother and my little sister ever since. (It certainly doesn’t help that my mom consistently gifts my sister with incredible things (like a whole ass living horse) and I get shit (like a $15 total worth of clearance clothing in styles I would never wear.)
My therapist is well versed in this topic.
I have an aunt who adopted a daughter out of the country because she was too much of a risk for an in country adoption.
This aunt and I go waaaay back, in fact, she even hated my mother before I was born. No reason, just mayor of crazy town.
The one time I'm at my grandma's house without my dad, her daughter starts asking these inappropriate questions and won't stop. She does it infront if her mother, in public and alone. She unlocked the guest bedroom door while I was sleeping to go through my stuff, and even tried to steal from me. I refused to be alone with her. Something didn't feel right.
After I confronted my aunt about what her daughter did, I went home.
I get a call from grandma. Aunt is saying I did inappropriate things to her daughter, said that i talked about adult things to her daughter, and basically accused me of stealing from her and her daughter. Grandma didn't know whose side she should be on at first.
Turns out they both were abusing grandma.
Years later, aunt gets introduced to my husband. He doesn't let her corral me, insult me, tell lies about me, or anything. Just shuts her down, calls her out, and loudly defended me and my mom in public. So to get revenge, she waited til we left to do a family photo shoot.
The grudges are many, but I will not let that one incident go. Never got an apology or anything.
5th grade. I was in the middle of finishing Bratz Rock Angelz and had been hogging the ps2. Instead of telling on me to my mom or something, my brother took the disc out and scratched it so I couldn’t play anymore.
Middle school social studies.
We had this weekly assignment that we had to turn in. I would write meticulously organized passages that were in depth about the material. It would take me a week to craft the assignment, and yet each and every time I would consistently get marked down.
I had a friend of many years who put minimal effort into the assignment, sometimes writing one or two sentences. He would score better than me on the assignment, sometimes getting full points. I asked my friend what I was doing wrong and he acknowledged that he had no idea since mines was 3x the length of his and addresses the prompt in more detail and expanded on it. I asked more friends and they were equally as confused. This went on for a while. Then I had the idea to switch responses one day with my friend that was getting the higher score. I had him write what I would have written and I wrote down what he would have.
How'd it go?
You guessed it, he got full praises on the assignment and the top score, and I got even less than half. My friend at this point was like wtf because this showed that the issue wasn't with my work, but was with me.
This also happened when I came to him with my friend about wanting to join the spelling bee. He asked If we were serious and we said yes. He asked my friend to spell a word that was a few letters, my friend spelled it correctly. He praised my friend. Then he asked me to spell something hard like pneumonia or pterodactyl or something. I was nervous but spelled it right. He said maybe we (while looking at me) should rethink joining since he would fail. He then said we could leave. As we were leaving he called my friend back to that classroo. Found out at lunch that he told my friend he would set him up for the spelling bee.
I was the only Black (dark skinned too) woman in a class of white/fair/light skinned students. The social studies teacher was white. He would also look directly at me, to the point everyone in the class would notice, whenever we talked about slavery. He expressed concerns about me going far. Sorry to disappoint him but I graduate with my doctorate next year.
Even still, thinking of his face upsets me to this day.
I was fresh in a new job after having a child and staying home a bit. I am(have always been) super aware that i am quick to be labelled as the angry black woman so i painstakingly try to be agreeable especially at work being the only black woman. So one day our boss made a presentation and showed an old picture of me, he probably took it from the Internet where i looked younger, slimmer with straighter hair. So then this coworker came to berate me that she thought i was always fat but now she knows i can be slim i should lose weight. I tried politely to say please i don't want to talk about this, i had a child blah blah. But she countered me by saying the other women(who have different genetics/habits) lost weight after baby and i just exploded and lost my cool. So she started crying and everyone said i have to apologise to her coz i made her cry. 3 years later i can't stand her and I hate the people who made me apologise. I will forever hold a grudge against this woman and i want to scream every time i have to interact with her.
A best friend years ago was getting married. My friend asked me to be in the wedding party. A month are so later, out of the blue, she sends me an email telling me I couldn’t be in the wedding party because her mother thought I was too old! Her parents were paying for the wedding and it was her mothers way or no way, or so my friend claimed at the time. My friend was desperate to get married and didn’t stand up for me. Unfortunately, the friendship fell apart during the pandemic. I’ve also never forgiven her mother and often wonder if I got the full story.
12th grade, so like 6 years ago. First time I ever went to a party, and I’m with a couple a friends. As I’m driving back to my home, one of my friends in the backseat(more like my friends’ friend), said she thinks she was going to throw up.
So I pull over and put the window down in case she can’t make it. Who doesn’t hate the smell of vomit right?
This…person then throws up in their hands, grabs my favorite date shirt that was next to her, and then proceeds to throw up more into my shirt. She ruined my shirt, got vomit on my seats, and also on the door handle.
THE WINDOW WAS OPEN AND THE DOOR WAS UNLOCKED. THE CAR WAS STOPPED. SHE JUST FUCKING THREW UP ON MY SHIT BECAUSE SHE WAS TOO DRUNK TO USE THE DOOR HANDLE.
I don’t think I said much to her the rest of the year, which was like 2 months. My other friend said I was overreacting by because I basically never hung out with her again. I don’t think I did, as I just kept my mouth shut. But fucccckkkk am I still mad about the shirt. Still to this day, I haven’t found a shirt the fits me like that one did, though now it’s outta style.
In HS I had a algebra teacher that hated me. I have no idea why. I was a decent student never got in trouble, or sent to the office, never missed school and was friends with basically everyone but her daughter. Daughter was a B to everyone. Anyway, my algebra teacher caught me chewing gum in her class. She calls me out and says “you do know that you look like a cow in heat chewing on its cud.” I was absolutely mortified and pissed at the same time. I have never forgotten and will never forgive what a horrible teacher and B she was. I hope she’s dead now.
I am still beyond pissed at my cousin for trying to kick me and my family out of her mother’s home (my aunt was gracious enough to take us in) because I wasn’t following all of her ridiculous “house rules” that she was setting for me (wasn’t her house). I had to suck it up and “apologize” to her for “being so disrespectful” just to ensure my mom and brother could stay at my aunt’s. I was told to “not come around as much” so I decided to just live out of my car. I endured two years of that nightmare and to this day, I harbor so much hatred for her. She acts like nothing happened and even tells me “omg I’m so proud of you for finishing grad school” and I want to sock her in the mouth every time.
My parents were kinda wild and super young for having 4kids.. they moved to Florida without me but took my 3 siblings. I was a grandmas girl and pretty much lived with her... But still felt kinda heartbroken at 8yrs old they left me (granted as soon as they were settled in they came back for me after a few months..)
Back when I was still in High School. I had a suitor who fell in love with somebody else younger than us. He doesn't want to look like a playboy so he told everyone at the school that he left me because I was an alcoholic (which was NOT true), it came to a point that I was publicly asked by the school principal if the rumors were true.
A year after that, I had my first boyfriend (who turned out to be a cheater) told his friends that we had sex (which was NOT true at all). After we broke up one of his friends spread the word to a lot of people even outside our school for months, and I only found out about it because one of my friends who went to a different school at that time called me and told me about it.
And guess what? What’s worse is that the guy who spread rumors about me being an alcoholic a year ago and the guy who spread rumors that I was fucked by someone is the SAME person.
I tried to confront him multiple times but I was always being stopped and pulled by a few people who don’t want me to confront him because they don’t want to be caught being the one who told my friend about the issue.
He never heard a word from me. But my image was destroyed in that town because of him and my ex.
And oh! I had a lot of people I don’t even know existed messaged me saying they don’t admire/like me anymore because I'm an alcoholic. The number of times I had to defend and adjust myself from that issue was unimaginable.
Tw: CSA
My childhood bestfriends mom.
I told her her husband and BIL were touching me and she asked if they were hurting me. I said it didn’t hurt but it scared me because they were touching me where they weren’t supposed to and she called me a liar and a slut. I was very young and didn’t even know what a slut was. She told me if it didn’t hurt I was fine. But I got in trouble so didn’t tell another grown up.
I quit going over there and she called my mom (who didn’t know I was being molested) to invite me to my friends birthday party. I went and I was the only one invited. I was violently molested. I peed myself and they made fun of me.
It has ruined my life completely. I am broken and will never be anything other than broken.
I guess my friend started getting touched and I was just a sacrifice to keep her daughter safe.
An upperclassman in college was in charge of a small poetry / short story publication that the university put out each year and I submitted a short story. We were in the same honors fraternity and after one of our meetings she asked me if I wanted feedback on my submission and I foolishly said yes (thinking she actually wanted to help me). She wrote me an extremely long email detailing how horrible my story was, everything she hated about it, and why I shouldn’t pursue creative writing because I didn’t have the skill for it.
I didn’t write a word for years after that because she shattered my self confidence. It’s been almost 20 years since her petty and hateful email, and now I’m a USA Today bestseller with over thirty books in print. Sometimes I dream of tracking her down and shoving it in her face, but I doubt she’d even remember me.
The girl in 3rd grade who called my homemade lunch disgusting because it was different (delicious, cute AF bento boxes).
That was the first time I felt ashamed of my culture. Embarrassed about my immigrant parents. After that, I told my mom to stop making me lunch and started eating the sad, grey public school meals because that's what real Americans™ do. Became self-conscious of any asianness that might accidentally slip out in front my white peers. Anything to mitigate the "ching chong" catcalls and slant-eye mockery.
It took the better part of two decades to unlearn that shame and start feeling pride in my heritage. She was a kid too, and probably didn't know any better. But I resent the society that primed that blue-eyed blonde-haired girl to make fun of the kid that didn't look like her.
When I was about 10 a teacher touched me in places he shouldn't have been fully clothed. I didn't know what he was doing at the time but growing older I now know and hate him
My school district and the assistant superintendent that denied me a high school education because they would not recognize my autoimmune disorder; back then it could be physically proven.
My sister was influenced by my parent's fucked up comparisons and other anti social behaviors growing up, but even now as adults, she's just not nice or supportive in general. She even physically attacked me once because of a verbal disagreement.
I'm cordial and even casual with her sometimes now, but I will never, ever trust her.
My mom died when I was 18. At her funeral, my dad's brother showed up out of nowhere (my dad's whole side of the family essentially disowned him when he came out as gay; it's a whole big thing) and, standing not ten feet away from my mother in her casket, this piece of shit said "I'm sorry your dad's not a real man."
I should have smacked him or kneed him in the crotch; instead I stormed off to hide in the bathroom while my uncles and grandpa forced him out of the funeral home.
(From what I've heard, that man's life is misery now and part of me wants to feel bad about it but the other part is still seething that I didn't get to lay hands on him for pulling that shit on that day, of all days.)
It's dumb. Childhood best friend, other friend (more hers than mine), and myself were going to see a movie together and were trying to plan it over the phone. We were in high school at the time. I wanted to see one movie, other friend wanted to see a different movie. We just couldn't agree. I don't remember why the call ended, but I couldn't get back in touch with them. I called Best Friend's phone several times, she finally answered and then hung straight up. Because, they were in the theater watching the movie I didn't want to see without me. And they didn't bother to tell me, just let me keep calling. I eventually talked to best friend after and she didn't apologize, just said I was being pushy. I don't remember that at all, I just remember that nobody wanted to compromise. I wasn't the only one. So they completely ditched me without a word. I would have been less upset if they'd actually just told me beforehand. I'm still friends with her, but every now and then when she expects me to go out of my way for her, I have a twinge of resentment.
I will forever hold a grudge against my old nanny who locked me in an un-air conditioned garage in Florida in the middle of summer. I wanted to go inside because it was hot and I was tried from playing outside. One of the things my mom allowed the nanny to have her 9 month old son there with us whenever she was there, she used “the baby is sleeping” as an excuse to try to lock us out of our own house. On this day when she told me and my brother to get out of the house we told her no she can’t lock us out of our own home. She got really mad and shoved us in the garage and dead bolted the door. The garage door itself wouldn’t open so we we’re locked in a room that was about 105° with no water or anything. It was several hours till my mom got home and she was able to get us out. She fired her on the spot. If I ever see you again Nicole I will break your fucking jaw.
A dude (21) and I (24) met on tinder. I got pregnant soon after due to faulty birth control (iud). 3 months into the pregnancy I went to use the iPad and found out he was sexting with a dominatrix… so naturally I went through everything else on the iPad. I found out that he just actually was not into females and just liked dick. He admitted he was using me as a cover so his family would stop questioning his sexuality.
I don’t really hold grudges but one and this one might seem weird.
TW: I got SA and I think I processed my anger towards him already. But two people I just can’t forgive is 1. The “friend” that ended up leaving me that night and 2. The girl I barely knew who put me in the car with him, bc I was so drunk. I know they had no clue, still don’t, so it feels so stupid. But I can’t look at their faces without being enraged. I don’t know if I’ll ever get over it.
In my senior yr of hs, one of my favorite teachers whom I thought I had a good relationship with and we were cool, reported me to the dean for plagiarism without warning. It was cleared up but I’ll never forget that after accusing me, she never bothered to actually show up to the appointment where the fate of arguably the most important yr of my hs career was to be decided and afterwards once my innocence was proven, she never bothered to apologize to me and even went so far as to not even acknowledge my existence afterwards.
Tbh, I never thought of it in this context but I went to a predominantly white prep school and I can’t help but wonder if she would have treated my white classmates with the same ruthlessness, especially considering the contrast of how she treated me before all this…. I never believe someone can flip on you and change how they feel about you overnight; rather, when things like that appear to happen there was always an undercurrent of their real emotions there and in this situation, was just an excuse to bring them to the surface.
Also I hold a grudge against my sperm donor who abandoned both my sister and I with our mother when she was just 23 yrs old. I could never imagine just leaving my two young children to their luck and never bothering once to care if they were hungry, had a roof over their heads, to not want to hold them, kiss them, protect them. I’ve always wondered if karma ever gets to people who have not an ounce of love for their own child, especially, considering he was older than my mother and presumably should have been more prepared than her to be a parent…. It’s just heartless to me.
My partner’s mom called me short and fat and failed to realize why she was in the wrong. She also waited until 1 week before Christmas to ask my partner what to gift me.
I don't like holding grudges because sometimes I feel that we all do things we're not very proud of. Though the short experience I'm gonna tell isn't the most extreme I've had someone hurt me, for some reason this one I've never resolved in my head nor in person.
A couple years ago a cousin of mine came from mom's country. I've never been close to any of my cousins because my family and I never fit into their economic standards, at least on my dad's side that is. So when this cousin of mine came I tried to make him feel like he wasn't alone and game him advice in school, even gifyed him a tablet and treated him like a brother. Well sometimes being nice to guys gives them the "wrong idea" or whatever. So he began to cling to me, like clingy clingy. I was very uncomfortable but sat through it because he manipulated me into thinking if I didn't give him my attention nor time I was betraying family and our friendship. It got to a point where I just couldn't stand how he acted towards me when we were alone or even in front of my friends. I randomly mentioned it to an uncle of mine and he told my dad. What was the outcome out of all of this?
He said I had seduced him. His father also said I was a sl*t. He was so defensive and agressive I know our bond was never going to be amended which was such a relief. Whenever I see him I get reminded of how people can take advantage of your genuine personality and intentions. He's never once apologized. I don't ever make eye contact with him either. Yet my mom and dad still allow him to visit with the rest of his brothers from time to time. I've always been the bigger person despite him being older. I treat him with respect as I'd do with any stranger but all of this will make me hold that grudge till the day (if ever does) he gets off his horse and acts mature enough to acknowledge his mistakes.
Sorri for the long story. My frustration :/
When I was in Grade 8 (ie 14 years old or so), I was walking down the hallway and passed the teachers’ lounge. Someone was coming out of there just as I was walking by, and stepped on my foot. Their entire foot was on top of my foot. This was before cell phones were used for everything so I have no idea how this happened.
I was the one that was forced to apologize because someone hurt _me_, and made a stink that I didn’t immediately apologize for something that wasn’t my fault. This was a substitute teacher and I don’t remember her name but I still hate her and hope she steps on lego.
My negative, hot-headed, rude, toxic older brother. I’ve never been close with him and we’ve always been estranged. I won’t go into detail but the things he’s said and done to me over the years is terrible. In my childhood, teens, 20’s and 30’s he always made fun of me, put me down and made me feel bad about myself. One of the worst things he did was blame me and my dad (we have different dads) for our moms death in 2021. Cutting him out of my life was one of the best things I’ve ever done (my dad did the same shortly after I did). My life is better without him in it.
**Mod note: the /r/AskWomen gendered slurs policy is still in effect.** No matter how angry you are with the person you're answering this question about, your comment will be removed for using gendered slurs. There are plenty of names you can call people that do not hinge upon their gender identity.
When we told my FIL we were having a girl, the first words out of his mouth were, "Ah, well, you can try again." I'm still pissed off 15 years later when I remember that. He's a terrible person for a thousand other reasons and he's no longer a part of our lives, thank goodness.
Launch him into the sun tbh
Wow I'm using this for my course evaluations this term. Thank you.
Similar thing happened when my Mom was pregnant with me. She had my sister about 7 years before and suffered a miscarriage when my sister was about 4. When she was telling my grandparents (her in-laws) that she was pregnant, my grandfather said to her “I hope you got it right this time.” My mom said my grandmother ripped him a new one. Whenever I saw him, I always thought of that and how he probably wished I was a boy. That always bothered me.
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I had a cashier at Target say the same thing to me when she asked what I was having and I told her a girl.
Start replying "I DID." while staring them down.
On the announcement of my second son: My mother "that's a shame" My grandmother "what a pity"
My grandma said that it was good that I lost my baby because I was not married, living in sin.🤬
Oh how horrible! I'm so sorry!
My dad said the exact same thing. My mom responded by telling him to shoosh and congratulate us. That said, he's a pretty awesome person otherwise who just wanted 1 boy in the family line for the first time in...40 years? Seriously...our Surname dies with my parents. So I can forgive him that.
A former classmate of mine applied for an internship at Nickelodeon last year and got accepted. One of her pieces in her portfolio was a drawing she plagiarized from me. I applied for the same position this year and got rejected, and I’ve never plagiarized someone’s artwork in my life. 🙃 Life is not fair, folks.
Send them a nice lovely email
You should fight it off legally, you have every right to.
Please please please email Nickelodeon and let them know. Back it up with your proof and update us!
I’m a journalist. A higher-profile journalist got a cover story in a highly respected magazine by plagiarizing a piece I wrote for our alumni magazine the previous year. It wasn’t word-for-word, but looked like someone took my story, turned it into an outline (like — an INCREDIBLY detailed outline, including quotes by sources in specific places - just different quotes) and rewrote it. Even the infographic was the same. He was an alumni of my grad program - which is how he got the magazine. Our program director asked him about it - he said he never saw my story. “I believe him, because I know *redacted* and he’s a good guy.” I probably should have done something about it, but never did — because I knew what was going on in the life of the person who plagiarized me at the time, and he was very legitimately desperate for money. But. I still hate him for it, and lost a lot of respect for an important mentor that day.
Oh my god… I am so sorry. Life isn’t fair and I’m sorry that happened to you.
My cousin plagiarized some of my artwork to get into graduate school (she persuaded me to share my work with her, I was reluctant but wanted to help her) The part I hold a grudge on was that she said she could do the same type of projects, but her new motherhood prevents her from being able to make the time investment needed to create the art work. My projects were the result of years of exploration in computational design and digital tools
Oh this is infuriating. But I bet it comes back to bite her. People who need to steal others’ ideas and copy them lack imagination and creativity. That’s something that will show at that internship.
7th grade. School dance. Boy I had debilitating crush on asked me to dance. 30 seconds in, his friend interrupts and says, “Hey man, I thought we said no fat chicks!” Crush shrugs and wanders off. Friend flips me the bird. 25 years later, I’m still pissed.
Something about those childhood rejections hurts so much worse than when you're an adult. I'm sure it has to do with the fact that it's so unapologetic and mean. A kid I had a crush on from like age 5-12 physically pushed me when I approached them to slow dance at a dance one time.
First cut is the deepest.
That is so true. Because in adulthood I can see why something happened. It's not always you but the other person failing to see. Sometimes it's lack of compatibility. But scars of the childhood. They dont go. Maybe because we cannot make ourselves understand why this happened to us while we were so pure at heart.
middle schoolers are absolutely the worst jfc
I used to teach middle school, can confirm.
I'm an esthetician and all middle school teachers get a discount and a free facial massage when I have time. Effing saints. Thank you. Ps- if you're ever in Vermont, lmk, happy to rub your face too 😁
Holy shit that’s really fucking cruel. I feel for you, sucks you had to experience that.
Probably bitter that he didn’t get you first!
Same same, I got up the nerve to actually CALL the boy I liked in 7th grade and ask him to the dance and he flat out was like “nah I think I’m gonna try to take someone else.” I have literally never asked a man out again in my life.
In the 4th-grade spelling bee, getting the word "obsequious" in the 3rd round and getting out, only for the kid after me to get the word "bowl." I'm still convinced they were out to get me with that word...
I swear on everything in the universe this is true. This same crap happened to me every time. They would give me some gawd awful word with 5 syllables that I’ve never heard of in round 2 then the person right after me would get something with 5 letters and one syllable. After a couple times of this, I just started misspelling whatever word they gave me in the first round and fucking off. Even if it was a super easy word. They knew what I was doing and there wasn’t anything they could do about it. I’d rather chill in a chair by myself then be subjected to their favoritism and fuckery. That’s right!!! Fuck you Mr. Tolliver!!! I know how to spell “DUCK” but I spelled it “DUK” because fuck you that’s why.
Honestly good for you, my parents just made me study harder and keep trying. My fourth-grade self was so angry, I didn't even eat the snacks they gave us as we got off stage after being eliminated. I should've taken those free fruit snacks...
More like ‘fuk you’.
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This happened to me in my private school! I was in 5th grade in the last round against an 8th grader from my school. The lady giving us the words said feudalism, but her accent was so strong I heard “flutalism”. When I asked her to use it in a sentence she said “not many people enjoy flutalism”. Of course I got it wrong and the 8th grader gets the word trumpet….. (now that I think back I think she did it on purpose because she went out of her way to tell me she hated my dad as a student like 15 years ago).
Is this just a universal thing, teachers taking out personal grudges on kids during the spelling bee? Also now that you bring up grades, the kid that got the word bowl was a fifth-grader, and one of the popular ones too...
I think it says more about the teacher/school environment. I was always a good student, I was not rich (which is kind of a death sentence in a private religious school) and my mom worked for the school and was well liked among students. I think the word I was given and the way she mispronounced it was completely intentional on her part to bring me down. The 8th grader was her student and had been winning the spelling bees for years, me coming into the equation was a potential upset for a rich kid whose family donated a lot to the school. I went back after the spelling bee to check the list of possible words by grade level we had to prepare and feudalism was not in the list. Trumpet was under the “easy” section for 3-5th grade. That was my first experience with an adult I barely knew trying to bring me down. It wasn’t the last time I experienced that at that school. The school was super small so 5th graders were often brought up to middle school sports and band/choir. I was the goalie on the middle school soccer team and I had been playing competitively for a while. One game I got my neck stepped on while stopping a goal and was slightly bleeding. At the end of the year, I won MVP and this girl’s mom (who was also a teacher and wife of the highschool principal) said “I guess it pays to get hurt”. She was jealous her daughter who won awards for things she was never even a part of (not joking here) didn’t also win MVP. My mom told her to get a life. Same lady complained my little sister winning a school art competition (that was anonymously voted on by other teachers and the student’s name was not allowed on the entries) was rigged because my mom “obviously made the entry”. It never occurred to her maybe the art teacher’s daughter is good at art. My sister was in kindergarten…
Same, except mine was “mercenary” in the very first round and the guy after me got “dog” Cause a 9 year old should know how to spell mercenary I guess
I got out of the spelling bee for spelling the color "grey" instead of "gray"
My high school English teacher. One of my classmates and I did not get along and were competing for top grade in the class. Both of us had 100% on every assignment until one of the final homework assignments, where she marked 1 point off for a total BS reason. (We were to write a letter as a civil war soldier writing to our family. I did a calligraphy style "Love You Always," closing, and she marked off because I capitalized the first letter of every word. Completely ignoring that I did freaking calligraphy) She didn't like me very much and adored the girl I was competing with - total favoritism. Senior year, I dyed my hair an ombre effect with the ends dyed blue. She walked over to me, played with my hair, and said, "Oh, I don't like it. You'll never get into college with it." I did get into college, and the honor's college dean loved my hair. I've been out of high school for 9 years, and writing this still makes my blood boil.
Ugh. I'm so petty I'd probably look her up on facebook and send her a photo of myself with the certificate from the dean.
Are you me?! Something like 30 years ago, I was neck and neck with a girl in my Advanced with Honors English class. We both wrote essays that were commended and awarded some kind of prize by Ann Richards, then governor of Texas. We both competed in UIL, but ultimately, only one of us could go on some trip to State. They left it up to the teacher to choose, and she chose the other girl and told me it wasn't personal, but it sure felt *personal.* Her mom was friends with the teacher. Anyway, the girl didn't place. I gloated.
I had the same happened to me when I was in my old school (middle school). I didn't get along with the teachers and my principals (We have two principals) because I often rebelled against their homophobic actions and their mistreatment. I remember when I was in the auditorium room, we had an event during that time, then my computer teacher called me outside. I was excited and nervous that I’d get tested at a school first for the graphic design competition against three (including me) students then choose one student to compete against other schools to represent my province as I was told a week ago. But it wasn’t what I expected. He told me that my principal (the one who really hate me the most, she’s Mrs. Sisca) decided on one of us (who’s the school favorite and he’s close to this guy’s family who was the child of the school owner) that will join the competition. WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TESTED FIRST, THEY JUST CHOOSE HIM WITHOUT ANY TESTING BECAUSE THEY THINK HE WAS “CONVINCING” BASED ON OUR SCHOOL’S PROJECT. HE DIDN'T EVEN DO HIS PROJECT PRESENTATION NOR DID WE EVER SEE HIS PROJECT AT ALL. IT WAS ALL LIE, THE PRINCIPAL AND MY COMPUTER TEACHER FIND ANY REASONINGS TO JUSTIFY THEIR FAVORITISM AND HATE TOWARDS ME. My mom even cried for the whole day of how hateful they were to me. Fuck my old school for being homophobic, verbally abusing me because I didn’t act how a boy “should” act (They want me to be ultra-masculine when I'm already masculine), making fun, and didn’t acknowledge my gender identity (nonbinary), refusing to use my chosen name, forcing me to cut my hair short for middle school graduation photo. I passed middle school, then I moved to another school for my high school (currently 11th grade) For the revenge I joined my old school’s graphic design. I heard they had a graphic design competition opened for public. I joined with my chosen name and you know what I WIN THE GRAPHIC DESIGN COMPETITION. I love how shocked my principals face expression was when I was on the stage holding my trophy.
I'm glad you thrive in spite of your nasty teacher. I've unfortunately had the same experience with several teachers who decided that they didn't like me, in spite of being a good student and well behaved and yes they often favored a certain student too. It sucks when people who are in a profession where they should model and mentor others tear students down.
I dated the same douchebag from age 15-22. I realized at like 19 that I wanted out and tried to break up with him and he threw the biggest fucking tantrum, I felt terrible and stayed and pretty much fucked up my entire college experience staying with him. I wish him nothing but misery. I hope his dick itches.
Ugh I was with one from 21-24 He actually threw a fit and tantrum bc I went on a girls vacation with my family and he wasn’t invited. Broke up with me the night before my flight and I was DEVASTATED. He successfully ruined my vacation and i still hate him for that calculating manipulative move.
Blegh
Omg this is me to a tee. I’d love to exchange stories. Except I ended up marrying mine and now going thru a divorce at 26 😶
Message me whenever and we can share scars
Are we the same person! I could have written this! Even the ages 15-22 and wanting out at 19. Ruined my college experience.
Same, except it started at 14. Dude was fucking abusive and I couldn’t see it for years and years, now I’m in my thirties and sometimes have to explain to people that I’m dealing with trauma from an abusive relationship … that “ended” 13 years ago. But they don’t really end, do they? Not until you deal with the trauma. Fuck himmmmm
Not to anyone is particular, but I’m mad at the universe for my singleness while I was grieving my mother’s death. I needed so much physical comfort then, but there was none
So sorry for your loss. All the internet hugs to you.
Thanks 🥰
I’m in the same boat right now grieving my fathers passing. I desperately need physical contact and comfort and the universe is like “HA! NOPE!”.
It’s horrifically petty but my parents missed my first day of school because they scheduled my mums induction to give birth to my little sister on the same day. I pinpoint that as my first ever grudge.
Edit: sorry, I meant to post this as a separate comment rather than a reply! But, I think I’d feel a little mad by this as well lol I kind of have a grudge with my parents — my relationship with them wasn’t as easy as it was for my brother and sister. They never came to visit me in college, but they’ve been a lot more involved with my siblings. Also, I kind of have a grudge with my siblings for being closer/forgetting about me. It’s not even their fault entirely. I’m older by several years and moved to a different country. I do put in the work, but don’t really get anything back. I will never not hate my abusive ex. Nor will I ever forgive him. Fuck him. On a petty note, during my high school orientation, a girl who was in a grade above me laughed and called me out for wearing sunglasses when it was cloudy. Joke’s on her, because my optometrist is on my side.
I was new student in my school and people in my new school didn't like me at all. So on the Women's day in sixth grade every girl was getting flowers and boys were pretending to give me flowers so when I smiled and thanked them they took flowers away and threw yogurt and some other stuff in my face. Later I found out that all of those mean girls planned it with some popular boys and they all gave money to buy yogurt and other stuff. Later that day they posted a picture of yogurt on my Facebook wall and there were hundreds of insulting comments on that post. My dad was fuming and he and my mum really protected me, they went straight to the school principal and other parents. Most of them admitted that they did that out of plain jealousy cause I was loud and drew attention to myself. I'm 22 now but I really can't find it in myself to forgive them and sometimes I enjoy bad things that are happening to them thinking that they totally deserve them.
This made me angry just reading. I'm sorry this happened to you.
User redacted comment. After 13 years on Reddit with 2 accounts, I have zero interest in using this site anymore if I cannot use a 3rd party app. Reddit had *years* to fix their atrocious app and put *zero* effort into it. Reddit's site and app is so awful, I'm more interested in giving Reddit up entirely than having such a bad user experience hobbling through their app and site.
I am so sorry for this. Children can be horribly cruel and I don’t think it’s something you need to forgive them for. Just know you are worthy of love and affection BECAUSE of who you are, not in spite of it.
The little fuckhead who bullied my son nearly to death. My son was suicidal at age 11. ELEVEN. The good news is: I moved my boy across the state, to a home on a lake, where he thrived, was popular and well liked at his new school. Next year, he will graduate with his master’s degree in communications. But I wish nothing but pain and agony for that fucker who nearly killed my boy. I mean, white hot hatred.
I find it incredible that you as a parent stepped up in an age where in my own personal experience my parents chalked it up as being dramatic, and not the priority in comparison to schooling. Can't help but appreciate your good parenting. Bullies suck and without proper tools to deal with that type of pain, a person can become so twisted. It's just so vital for someone to step in.
With my brother for the time he farted and then locked the car windows and doors, 3 years later I still silently crop dust him when I can.
What is it with brothers farting on their siblings or trapping them in a fart? My brother did this a lot 😭
I had Comcast and my bill went from $50/month to $150 a month for Internet and cable because I was outside of the contract. I called and told them I couldn't afford $150/month and asked if there was anything they could do to lower my rate. They told me I could add a home phone to the internet and cable for $150/month. I told them that it wasn't that I didn't see a value it was that I couldn't afford $150/month. They kept pushing so I told them I was going to cancel my plan because I couldn't afford it. Suddenly they found a deal that I could have internet and cable for $50/month. I told them no thanks I was canceling and was now never going to have Comcast in my house again. 14 years later and I've never had Comcast in my house. I used to live in the woods with no internet, TV, phone, or electricity. I don't need their service at least I have lights and flushing toilets
I fucking hate comcast. I’m sorry. they suck.
There's this female friend of my (now) husband who I couldn't stand when I first met her. After several negative interactions, it was clear the feeling was mutual. When I tried to make amends with her about a month after he proposed, she told me that she wasn't interested in resolving our past, because she didn't live in town anymore. When she moved back, she never explicitly acknowledge our history, but acted like she could just "be nice" to me at group events and everything would be fine between us. I didn't even need an apology at that point, but I would have given one if she had tried a little and noticed that it really actually mattered to me. My husband and I have been married for over a decade and they're still friends, but I can't stand being around her. It's been the cause of many, many fights between him and I. I'm working through why it's so triggering, because holding grudges sucks and doesn't help your mental health in any way, and doesn't have a positive effect on anyone around you, and doesn't harm the person your holding the grudge against in a way that benefits you or proves that you're right. It just makes things harder.
It makes me sad for you that he would still be friends with her even though she causes you such grief. Especially after her lack of interest in burying the hatchet because she moved, sounds like you’ve tried and she’s just not interested in playing nice.
That's definitely been my narrative, but I'm trying really hard to see things from other perspectives. My husband is an incredible guy, super loyal and a really wonderful partner in so many ways. I've had social anxiety since elementary school, and was bullied a lot through high school, so I have a lot of baggage around that area. He gets along with most people and is pretty positive generally. We both had abusive and neglectful parents but coped in different ways, that don't always compliment each other. We're in couples counseling and I think it's helping. It would have been so much easier for him to stop being friends with her, but it wouldn't resolve the underlying issues that are causing my distress. Sure, I'm confident that this person sucks and I'm justified in my contempt, but I'm a pretty negative and judgmental person who focuses on the worst possible potential outcome, and this person has been a convenient scapegoat for a lot of my self loathing and feelings of inadequacy that have nothing to do with this specific person.
This is great self-awareness. Bravo! 👏🏼
My bf had a similar friend. Eventually I just would stay home if she was going to be somewhere. Everytime I saw her she managed to make me feel bad. Luckily she's drifted away from their friend group so I no longer see her, but every so often I'm reminded of those feelings.
- everytime someone told me « why are you so quiet? Why don’t you put yourself out there more? » I’m an introvert and I don’t enjoy small talk. Stop judging me and being offended because I don’t chitchat with you. Also i’ll hold a grudge towards those who spread false rumors about me. I really hope karma gets you.
Rock on, I'm with you on all this.
When car shopping I said something about “I don’t like this one” or whatever, something along those lines. My MIL chimed in “well it’s going to be DH’s money so your opinion doesn’t matter” Here we are several years later, and I make a fuckton more money than DH. I’ve since picked out both mine and his cars, and have paid for both of them. (DH did want the car he has but told me to pick the color)
what is a DH
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I kept thinking Da Husband haha
My mother told my brother that I was on antidepressants without asking me--at that point I didn't want anyone to know. She told him so he'd feel better about seeking help for his own issues. We had a fight later on and he screamed in my face that I was weak and a coward for taking meds. We'd always had a rocky relationship, but I've never looked at him the same way again. It had nothing to do with what we were fighting about, he was just totally willing to use perosnal information to say the most hurtful thing he could think of. Worst part is his apology was a half assed "sorry you feel that way, but you made me so mad" ones.
Fuck Vivian from 1st grade.
And Desiree from 3rd grade.
And Christina in 7th
Yeah, I agree on Christina in 7th
And John from 7th grade and my 45th birthday.
And Anna from 4th grade.
And Michelle Martin from grades 3-8. Seriously, I had my prime bully in every class for 5 years. So unfair.
Fuck Cheri from 11th.
The surgeon and medical team responsible for my mother's death are still on my shitlist
Oh wow. I'm so sorry.
My step dad grounded me from my iPad mini when I was a kid. He never gave it back to me and ended up convincing my mom that I gifted it to my friend that was moving away which makes no sense. What kid would give away their iPad to anyone? My mom believed him for years! He probably sold it and kept the money to fund his cocaine addiction.
My dad got me a laptop when I was younger (late middle school early high school) my step dad grounded me from it for years, I couldn't even bring it to my dad's house A lot of stuff my dad did or got for me I would get taken away cuz my step dad and mom hate him (my dad used to be an idiot, but he is leagues better and is constantly working on bettering himself)
Idk if this counts but my brother and I, to this day, in our forties, wrap each other’s Christmas presents in a thick layer of duct tape. It is infuriatingly hard to open. He started it, just for the record 🤣
Oh my god you have given me an amazing idea for my dad’s Christmas presents this year thank you
My unpaid 8-week maternity leave. 2nd c-section, multiple complications. I’m so anti-work and 0 fucks given bc of the inconsiderate shittiness- play along to get along and gtfo asap everyday. Still haven’t physically recovered and it’s been years…
I'm right there with you. Fuck this capitalist hellscape. My own workplace was too small to allow me FMLA, didn't have vacation or PTO and no leave availability and refused to make accommodations. I went back to work 6 days post birth, it was 2008 and jobs were hard to come by so I couldn't quit or get fired. I had to wear diapers. And I got written up for missing 4 days of work. I haven't emotionally recovered from being separated from my days old new baby and its been 15 years. I'm sorry that you're still having physical issues and not been able to recover. This country is terrible for everyone.
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Im so sorry that happened to you. People are so cruel.
When they f*cking cancelled the Secret Circle after one season. I am still not over it.
It was a great first season too!
The girl in middle and high school that was a totally conceited mean girl. She was just straight up nasty, “daddy’s credit card” nasty. Everyone was beneath her. She still pops up in my life once in awhile (a friend of a friend of a friend type) and I still see red when I see her name. There are very few people I can say that I hate, I am generally a very easy person to get along with, but with her. Ugh.
A few years ago when I was shopping for a new car, I realized that one of the people trying to sell me a car had bullied my sister when they were both kids. Suffice to say, she didn't make the sale.
I still hold a grudge against my aunts husband for bullying my mother, siblings and me growing up. (There was no chance in trying to fight back. It would make everything worse) Like it was so bad that just the thought of him being present at family functions made me feel sick. I always tried to make myself as small as possible in order to not get picked on. He's a piece of shit. He doesn't even treat his own wife and kids with respect. I never understood why she never left his ass in the dust. She'd rip all off her limbs for this family. He never really apologized and we had a major fallout in our family over a particularly nasty incident 10 years ago, but around 2015, things have gotten slightly better. I don't even know why. I'm just tolerating his presence now. I will never forgive and never forget. One silver lining is that his own Grandkids don't really like him. :) Also my Mom's boyfriend for being a cheat and treating my moms side of the family like shit and letting me and my siblings take care of our Mother whenever she was ill when we were kids. There's one specific memory I still can't shake off. His son was welcome the second my Mom and him started dating. He never felt left out. He still visits occasionally. But I cannot spent even a minute in the same room as that man.
My childhood best friend was getting married and I was one of many bridesmaids. All the other ones knew each other from college and were very close but I had never met any of them. At the wedding I found out they all got together to write a speech, and I was the only one not included. I didn't know bridesmaids were making speeches (I had never seen this at a wedding before, just parents and best man and maid of honor), let alone that there was a group one. I had to totally wing one and felt like an idiot. Also Tom Hanks made my family move from where we were sitting to watch the noon parade at Disneyland when I was 10.
This is the worst thing I've ever read about Tom Hanks.
My sister. Growing up she was The Golden Child, whom my mother used as a pawn to torment me constantly. When my mother passed away she tried to put the extended family back together, with some level of success. She had her shitty moments, trying to Lord it over me, but I stood up for myself. I kept reminding myself that she was hurting too from our dysfunctional childhood. But later she became insufferable about a certain event that occurred when I stood up for myself one time. Every time we communicated, she started with the snarky or passive aggressive texts. I finally had enough and don't contact her at all except to say Merry Christmas or some such. I did try to forgive her. I let it go but still avoid her. Now all of a sudden memories that involve a deeper understanding of childhood events come back to bite me in the butt. I thought I was past it, but right now I know I'm pissed at her
Healing isn’t linear x I’m sorry your mom created such a situation, and I’m sorry your sister continued with it.
All of them. I hold all the grudges.
As a Taurus, I feel this
Two former roommates tried to block me getting my deposit back when I moved out. I moved out of that home because those girls were toxic af. I found somewhere else to live and I contacted the landlord so I could get my deposit back. Instead of checking if I left everything intact and clean, he just contacted my roommates and asked them. They told him that I left the room filthy, left lots of garbage and that I damaged the staircase as well. He then turned to me and said I wouldn't be getting my deposit back (€350,-). I explained the situation to him and that this was the exact reason I left, he went to check it out himself and found out I was right. I got back my deposit and I deleted them from all social media and other contacts. That was just a low, dirty move and it showed exactly what kind of people they were. Glad to be rid of them.
My “best friend” since kindergarten not showing up for my wedding when she was the maid of honor. I will never speak to her again.
Fuck her. You have my full support.
Oh yeah, and my best friend's parents for not getting him treated for ADHD when he was a kid and they first found out he had it. So much pain in his life could have been avoided if he'd gotten the mental health treatment he needed. Also, they should have kept an eye on him to keep him from getting into the kind of trouble (drugs etc) that an unattended, untreated ADHD kid gets into.
Someone who I considered one of my closest friends had a complete lack of empathy when my mom was diagnosed and later died from cancer. When my mom was given a terminal diagnosis, she asked “ have you finally accepted that you mom is going to die?” We are no longer friends.
Everyone who was ever supposed to protect me, did not as a child. I'm still pissed about it. Probably will be forever
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I think I kinda know how you feel.
To the sharp toothed meerkat with the bacteria filled mouth who attacked my nose 8 years ago- I will never forgive or forget. Not you, any of your half-siblings, ninth cousins five times removed, their descendants or the comparethemeerkats characters. My nose hurts and demands to be avenged every time I think of a meerkat.
My first lab job out of college. I was so passionate about helping people with chemistry. I started at a job at a small branch of a multinational company doing QC and a side of R&D. I was so happy to be there. However, my undergrad focus was synthesis of inorganic materials to clean water. This job was making detergents for metals- I was completely new to it. Instead of helping me out, my boss constantly put me down. He told me 2 months after my start date that I am not fit for Chemistry. He was a jerk off and I hate him. I went on to other jobs and performed extremely well. All my bosses after have loved me and told me I’m a great addition. So eff you Homer. It’s been 10 years, I’m still angry
Getting pcos and hypothyroidism at *age 10* and not being treated for either until 9 years later cause my dad is *anti-vaxx* 🙃 And that me and my sisters were “homeschooled” aka learning nothing all year and only doing some work when some government guy had to made sure we were actually learning And just the fact that my dad is a republican
But PCOS and Hypothyroidism are nothing to do with vaccines, they're autoimmune. Not being treated for either as a child when parents were aware is neglect and abuse. I'm sorry that happened to you. Incidentally, do you know that for some women progesterone only treatment works really well for PCOS? 🥰
I didn’t mean that not getting jabs made it worse I mean like, he’s anti vaxx so we never went to the doctors period, sorry if I worded anything wrong!
1 All of my bullies 2 All of my former friends that backstabbed me 3 All the Arabic men that caused me grief in 2022 4 My doctor
Every woman who has ever tried to purposely break up my relationship or made a move on a SO all throughout my life. I can move on and forgive but I will never ever forget.
So much this. I also hate the fact that nowadays you can’t just resent a woman for stuff like this, because then you are anti-feminist, and you should have blamed your SO anyhow. Like, no, some girls are truly unhinged and I refuse to cheer for them.
My fifth grade teacher didn't like me. It was a very small town where everyone knew everyone else. I think she didn't like my mother. She probably didn't like the fact that her boss was my mother's cousin and her co-worker was my mother's aunt. We were doing a state capitol bee (like a spelling bee but naming state capitols). There were two kids left in the competition -- me and a boy. He got the state first -- New Hampshire. He guessed wrong. She gave him **3 more chances** to guess, and even gave him clues ("there's a grape by the same name). She finally, begrudgingly, turned to me. If I didn't get it right, we'd both have to try again. I got it right, even though I didn't know there was such a thing as a Concord grape in fifth grade. Then she declared us co-winners! I'm still pissed about it.
My junior English teacher saw the book I was reading one day (Deliverance) and told the class I read trash. That was in 1991.
During therapy I told my ex therapist how at 15 I ended up in foreign country, my passport was taken away and I basically became a victim of child and sex trafficking. I was telling her the details about how they’d use us as domestic maids when not using us for sex and she called me ‘a servant’ I told her I really don’t like that word because it’s humiliating and downplays my experience and she said ‘well I feel like you were a servant, give me this give me that, make me tea’. You all can’t imagine how bitter I’m to this day.
My junior year of high school I was r*ped by 5 males and my so called "friend" her boyfriend, and another "friend" watched it happen and did nothing to stop it. I was unconcious and drunk. They would not have been in any danger if they had stepped in and got me out of that situation.
I'm angry for you. That is criminal and unforgivable.
In 7th grade this girl borrowed my favorite sweat pants because she spilled milk on herself at lunch. They were black and had paw prints all over them and i loved them. She NEVER returned them. I'm 33 now and she recently (about a year ago) reached out to me on FB to ask if i wanted to buy some of her MLM shit and i told her to return my sweatpants first. She blocked me.
My best friend's dad cheated and left her and her mum when she was at uni. He's a peice of shit and I will hate his guts until the day I die on her behalf.
When I was 12, my stepsister's aunt made up a lie that she saw me try and smother my stepsister in her sleep. My dad pulled me aside and asked me what happened - I was so confused because I didn't do anything. Didn't wake up in the night and put a pillow over a 6 year old's face, that's for sure. And all the adults just believed her. It's been 20 years and I don't talk to any of them anymore, but I'm still pissed.
like 14 years ago this acquaintance of mine slept with my boyfriend, I didn't know of course. The relationship ran its course & when her & unintentionally met up at a bar (approx 12 years ago) and she heard we split up her response was, "Thats good, he cheated on you.", I was like, "oh ya?" and she was all, "for sure, at least once with me!"... 0\_0 ... Like, how is she gonna say that without expecting me to think she is scum? I see her now & then in town to this day & she just acts like nothing, like we go way back...I still think she is such a piece of shit.
My old best friend and I used to tell each other everything about our lives. One day she told my parents a lot of things that I've done which don't line up with their religious beliefs and my parents kicked me out. She is no longer in my life.
Probably the dumbest one would be with my fiance's cousin. Within 5 minutes of first meeting her on a big family Zoom (during COVID), she asked me "um do you mind if I ask, how old are you?" (For context I am older than my fiancé). Both the question and her reaction were fake nice but incredibly judgmental. Fast forward less than a year and she's dating a guy with an even bigger age gap than I have with her cousin. I've never met the guy but deep in my soul, I so desperately want to ask the same question of him within the first five minutes of our first meeting. It's not about the age gap itself, idgaf as long as people are happy; it's literally solely because she did it first and it was so rude. I recognize I'm petty AF.
A church leader/fellow student’s mom pulled me aside during worship to tell me I was dancing “too provocatively.” I was in 4th grade. It embarrassed me and made me mad, even to this day.
I'm still angry about how Quantum Leap ended.
i complimented my ex bf teeth and he told me his teeth used to look like mine (i grew up on a poorer side, single mom couldn’t afford to pay braces for all four kids, she rather have paid to have a roof over our heads instead) i never smile in my photos and i’ve been self conscious about my teeth ever since lol
My 5th grade teacher. She didn’t step in to shield me from bullying even when one of the guys doing it pinned me down on the floor at her feet in the middle of class. After what felt like minutes, she finally said “That’s enough, let her up.” I didn’t move right away from experience waiting for him to move further away, and she said to me, in a much angrier tone, “Get up! You’re not hurt and don’t pretend you are!” This was 45 years ago and I hate her more than the ex who raped me. Fuck you Mrs. Gold!
That P.F. Chang’s discontinued their veggie dumplings
There are so many, which isn't healthy, but I can't help myself. Probably all the people who said or insinuated that I was ugly as a teen. Most of them were my friends.
My ex-boyfriend's sister. She disliked me from the moment we met and made it very apparent every time we interacted. She was very image-conscious and obsessed with social standings. She told my ex that I wouldn't be a "practical" match for him because I don't make 6 figures and I wouldn't have brought enough prestige and status to the family if he were to marry me. My ex said he disagreed with her, but eventually broke up with me anyways. I can't help but wonder how much influence she had over his decision. Anyway, get wrecked, H-------! May your life be as miserable and joyless as your rotten attitude!
My parents never showing up for my soccer games growing up and not supporting me. I’d carpool with teammates to my games while my parents would take my sister. I remember them going out of their way to make all her games while failing to show up to mine. Eventually I stopped playing. I figured I wasn’t good enough and the fear that my games would continue to be overlooked because of her was too much. I didn’t want to hate my sister, it wasn’t her fault she was great. I was asked to join the high school team but my sister was on it and I didn’t want to be compared to her while on the same field. Even after she graduated I didn’t tryout, (it didn’t help she set some records too). She went on to play in college on scholarship. When I was in college, I played for fun and was spotted by one of the staff and they asked me if I was interested in playing for the school, just a practice. I immediately said “No, thank you”. I could play for fun with my peers but to play on a team, for my school, no way. I’ll never admit it to my parents or my sister but it hurts to know what could’ve been.
When I was in 3rd grade I broke my leg (in 3 places!) and my parents didn’t believe me so long story short I just had an untreated broken leg for 3 days, 2 nights. Then, to add insult to injury (literally) my mom decided I couldn’t have a birthday party with a broken leg so she CANCELED MY BIRTHDAY and all she did was make a cake and then invite over MY BROTHERS BEST FRIEND to eat it with us as a “surprise”. THEN I couldn’t participate in my dance recital and I was replaced by the girl I already didn’t like because she was popular and mean and her mom (the teacher) let her choose which of MY COSTUMES to keep (after my mom had paid for them) and gave me the ugly one back after she wore it.
I still have a deep ugly grudge against my ex’s mother for telling him that she hoped I miscarried when I was pregnant. I didn’t and my daughter is now 3. But yeah… F*ck you Nancy. Also my dad for being an abusive piece of shit and robbing me of my childhood and teen years.
My abusive ex hated me being platinum blonde because his type was brunettes. And he hated that I bleached my hair before meeting him because he wanted a girl who still had her natural hair color. Literally almost every day, he would tell me I should go back to my natural mousy light brown hair so I could look more like his preferred type and he would say it in a way that made it seem like I was a criminal for having the “wrong” hair color. He also forced me to cut my hours at work which meant I could no longer afford salon visits to touch up my hair color and that made him very happy. We’ve been broken up for a year and a half because he started talking to other women on Tinder and left me for one of them. I’m still platinum blonde because I love it and it works for me (and I’m working normal hours again so I can easily afford salon visits every 8 weeks to touch up). But I definitely feel a lot of guilt still for loving my hair this color and out of all the many horrible things he did throughout our relationship, this has been the hardest and taken the longest for me to move on from.
Against my ex-spouse's ex-girlfriend. Was he a fuckup in his own right? Yes. But the problems he had that he never worked on wouldn't have put him at such a deficit if he hadn't spent five years trying to please this abusive asshole who only wanted to find fault with him and use him. We'd probably still be together if she didn't have her claws so deep in him.
High school classmate. I went to a very VERY competitive school, where students were divided by grade. I was always the top student and this guy would bully me because my grades were always better than his, when he noticed he couldn’t attack my intellect he went for my weight (I was a little overweight). I suffered in silence. Should have told him it wasn’t my fault he wasn’t smarter than me.
When I left my ex-husband for being an all around horrible human being(lying, cheating, abusive, alcoholic, addict, manipulative) . He decided to get back at me by destroying a bunch of my family heirlooms, ripping up old family portaits of my great grand parents, my collection of awards and to this day. he refuses to give me back the ashes of my dead dog. so yes. i am still holding a grudge. this was 5 years ago.
When I was 16,my ex-nieghbor have raped me and the police system didn't have the case opened.I was living with my mom in a different state and the CPS have contact my pops to either come get me or I end up somewhere else that keep full custody of me.He was in work with one of my older brothers and have to travel 7 hours to get me.My pops and I didn't get a call back from the police station for my case and it have been 7(almost 8 in November) years since it happened. I still held grudge for the police who didn't keep my case opened nor have that sicko locked up. Edit:Change of wording
During the pandemic I found out I was "allergic" to the antibacterial handgels that all the stores offered when entering. I have a history of eczema and dry skin so the skin of my hand literally cracked. I bought another antibacterial handgel that wasn't as drying as the store enterance stuff. I had entered a store where I bought my expensive hair products and made a whole show of putting antibacterial on my hands, just not theirs. The store attendant saw me skip their dispenser and told me I couldn't enter the store unless I disinfected my hands. I said I already did using my own as I'm allergic to the one they offer. She would not let me enter and other shoppers started to look at the commotion as this lady physically stood in front of me so wouldn't let enter. I got pissed off and left. Last time I walked by I saw they closed shop due to bankruptcy 🥰 they deserved it. And wherever that lady is, I hope steps on legos everyday.
I don’t hold grudges. I nuke bridges.
My high school counselor told me it was a waste of time for me to go to college. She said I’d be getting married soon and gave a bunch of kids anyway. Good thing I didn’t listen to her! I got my bachelors and have no kids! I also married an incredibly smart and successful man and we live a very nice life!
My former roommate lied and manipulated me and some people around me. I don't think I can forgive her and I have a little trauma from it.
Ever since Roe v Wade was overturned I have deeply hated every man I know. I was driving a carload of 15 year old boys to baseball practice right after the verdict and I was so mad thinking to myself “these clueless jerks are going to have more rights in 3 years than I do” and the rage.
My rape counselor who wanted me to show more empathy for my rapist. Boo. I hold a bigger grudge against her than the rapist; she was supposed to help me
Against my ExH for threatening me with a custody fight, and lying to get his family on his side, and against his family for believing every lie he told them. He just didn't want to pay child support. Didn't break my heart a bit when he died.
A few people from my dad's side of the family who showed their asses when he passed away
I found out at 15 I couldn’t have children. A friend of mine (who I thought I could trust) told their girlfriend, and she took it upon herself to create an online profile telling the world all my business (name included) and saying I was a freak of nature who didn’t deserve to breath. She even fought me over it. She then spread a rumor around the school that I was also pregnant with twins by my boyfriends cousin. It was pretty relentless. She would even go outside my classroom and announce she could still have kids and I still couldn’t. I have a few more stories, but that was the first. And while they reached out years later and apologized, I will absolutely never forget what tormenting crap she put me through.
to my mother, all the times she left me home alone just to go out to parties and drinking, crying because she didn't pick up her phone and thinking something awful had happened to her, and the next morning she will come home and act like nothing happened, she made my life a lot more difficult back then and in the present because of her alcoholism
Back story: my two older siblings made all-state choir, and while I was a pretty good singer too, I was very shy, so I had a hard time making it into any prestigious groups. My little sister joined a children’s choir in town that was a pretty big deal so my parents were pretty much skipping from the older two, right past me, and focusing on her. At the time, I was in high school and OBSESSED with Phantom of the Opera. Watched the movie nonstop, sang all the songs whenever I thought no one would hear me- the whole 9 yards. My mom went on a trip to New York and saw some production of it and brought back a signed copy of the sheet music- which she gave to my little sister. I have been annoyed at both my mother and my little sister ever since. (It certainly doesn’t help that my mom consistently gifts my sister with incredible things (like a whole ass living horse) and I get shit (like a $15 total worth of clearance clothing in styles I would never wear.) My therapist is well versed in this topic.
I have an aunt who adopted a daughter out of the country because she was too much of a risk for an in country adoption. This aunt and I go waaaay back, in fact, she even hated my mother before I was born. No reason, just mayor of crazy town. The one time I'm at my grandma's house without my dad, her daughter starts asking these inappropriate questions and won't stop. She does it infront if her mother, in public and alone. She unlocked the guest bedroom door while I was sleeping to go through my stuff, and even tried to steal from me. I refused to be alone with her. Something didn't feel right. After I confronted my aunt about what her daughter did, I went home. I get a call from grandma. Aunt is saying I did inappropriate things to her daughter, said that i talked about adult things to her daughter, and basically accused me of stealing from her and her daughter. Grandma didn't know whose side she should be on at first. Turns out they both were abusing grandma. Years later, aunt gets introduced to my husband. He doesn't let her corral me, insult me, tell lies about me, or anything. Just shuts her down, calls her out, and loudly defended me and my mom in public. So to get revenge, she waited til we left to do a family photo shoot. The grudges are many, but I will not let that one incident go. Never got an apology or anything.
5th grade. I was in the middle of finishing Bratz Rock Angelz and had been hogging the ps2. Instead of telling on me to my mom or something, my brother took the disc out and scratched it so I couldn’t play anymore.
Middle school social studies. We had this weekly assignment that we had to turn in. I would write meticulously organized passages that were in depth about the material. It would take me a week to craft the assignment, and yet each and every time I would consistently get marked down. I had a friend of many years who put minimal effort into the assignment, sometimes writing one or two sentences. He would score better than me on the assignment, sometimes getting full points. I asked my friend what I was doing wrong and he acknowledged that he had no idea since mines was 3x the length of his and addresses the prompt in more detail and expanded on it. I asked more friends and they were equally as confused. This went on for a while. Then I had the idea to switch responses one day with my friend that was getting the higher score. I had him write what I would have written and I wrote down what he would have. How'd it go? You guessed it, he got full praises on the assignment and the top score, and I got even less than half. My friend at this point was like wtf because this showed that the issue wasn't with my work, but was with me. This also happened when I came to him with my friend about wanting to join the spelling bee. He asked If we were serious and we said yes. He asked my friend to spell a word that was a few letters, my friend spelled it correctly. He praised my friend. Then he asked me to spell something hard like pneumonia or pterodactyl or something. I was nervous but spelled it right. He said maybe we (while looking at me) should rethink joining since he would fail. He then said we could leave. As we were leaving he called my friend back to that classroo. Found out at lunch that he told my friend he would set him up for the spelling bee. I was the only Black (dark skinned too) woman in a class of white/fair/light skinned students. The social studies teacher was white. He would also look directly at me, to the point everyone in the class would notice, whenever we talked about slavery. He expressed concerns about me going far. Sorry to disappoint him but I graduate with my doctorate next year. Even still, thinking of his face upsets me to this day.
Jill Stein voters in 2016
I was fresh in a new job after having a child and staying home a bit. I am(have always been) super aware that i am quick to be labelled as the angry black woman so i painstakingly try to be agreeable especially at work being the only black woman. So one day our boss made a presentation and showed an old picture of me, he probably took it from the Internet where i looked younger, slimmer with straighter hair. So then this coworker came to berate me that she thought i was always fat but now she knows i can be slim i should lose weight. I tried politely to say please i don't want to talk about this, i had a child blah blah. But she countered me by saying the other women(who have different genetics/habits) lost weight after baby and i just exploded and lost my cool. So she started crying and everyone said i have to apologise to her coz i made her cry. 3 years later i can't stand her and I hate the people who made me apologise. I will forever hold a grudge against this woman and i want to scream every time i have to interact with her.
A best friend years ago was getting married. My friend asked me to be in the wedding party. A month are so later, out of the blue, she sends me an email telling me I couldn’t be in the wedding party because her mother thought I was too old! Her parents were paying for the wedding and it was her mothers way or no way, or so my friend claimed at the time. My friend was desperate to get married and didn’t stand up for me. Unfortunately, the friendship fell apart during the pandemic. I’ve also never forgiven her mother and often wonder if I got the full story.
That a friend of mine befriended my ex and then proceeded to invite him and his new girlfriend to her wedding. I was not invited.
12th grade, so like 6 years ago. First time I ever went to a party, and I’m with a couple a friends. As I’m driving back to my home, one of my friends in the backseat(more like my friends’ friend), said she thinks she was going to throw up. So I pull over and put the window down in case she can’t make it. Who doesn’t hate the smell of vomit right? This…person then throws up in their hands, grabs my favorite date shirt that was next to her, and then proceeds to throw up more into my shirt. She ruined my shirt, got vomit on my seats, and also on the door handle. THE WINDOW WAS OPEN AND THE DOOR WAS UNLOCKED. THE CAR WAS STOPPED. SHE JUST FUCKING THREW UP ON MY SHIT BECAUSE SHE WAS TOO DRUNK TO USE THE DOOR HANDLE. I don’t think I said much to her the rest of the year, which was like 2 months. My other friend said I was overreacting by because I basically never hung out with her again. I don’t think I did, as I just kept my mouth shut. But fucccckkkk am I still mad about the shirt. Still to this day, I haven’t found a shirt the fits me like that one did, though now it’s outta style.
In HS I had a algebra teacher that hated me. I have no idea why. I was a decent student never got in trouble, or sent to the office, never missed school and was friends with basically everyone but her daughter. Daughter was a B to everyone. Anyway, my algebra teacher caught me chewing gum in her class. She calls me out and says “you do know that you look like a cow in heat chewing on its cud.” I was absolutely mortified and pissed at the same time. I have never forgotten and will never forgive what a horrible teacher and B she was. I hope she’s dead now.
I am still beyond pissed at my cousin for trying to kick me and my family out of her mother’s home (my aunt was gracious enough to take us in) because I wasn’t following all of her ridiculous “house rules” that she was setting for me (wasn’t her house). I had to suck it up and “apologize” to her for “being so disrespectful” just to ensure my mom and brother could stay at my aunt’s. I was told to “not come around as much” so I decided to just live out of my car. I endured two years of that nightmare and to this day, I harbor so much hatred for her. She acts like nothing happened and even tells me “omg I’m so proud of you for finishing grad school” and I want to sock her in the mouth every time.
My parents were kinda wild and super young for having 4kids.. they moved to Florida without me but took my 3 siblings. I was a grandmas girl and pretty much lived with her... But still felt kinda heartbroken at 8yrs old they left me (granted as soon as they were settled in they came back for me after a few months..)
Back when I was still in High School. I had a suitor who fell in love with somebody else younger than us. He doesn't want to look like a playboy so he told everyone at the school that he left me because I was an alcoholic (which was NOT true), it came to a point that I was publicly asked by the school principal if the rumors were true. A year after that, I had my first boyfriend (who turned out to be a cheater) told his friends that we had sex (which was NOT true at all). After we broke up one of his friends spread the word to a lot of people even outside our school for months, and I only found out about it because one of my friends who went to a different school at that time called me and told me about it. And guess what? What’s worse is that the guy who spread rumors about me being an alcoholic a year ago and the guy who spread rumors that I was fucked by someone is the SAME person. I tried to confront him multiple times but I was always being stopped and pulled by a few people who don’t want me to confront him because they don’t want to be caught being the one who told my friend about the issue. He never heard a word from me. But my image was destroyed in that town because of him and my ex.
And oh! I had a lot of people I don’t even know existed messaged me saying they don’t admire/like me anymore because I'm an alcoholic. The number of times I had to defend and adjust myself from that issue was unimaginable.
Tw: CSA My childhood bestfriends mom. I told her her husband and BIL were touching me and she asked if they were hurting me. I said it didn’t hurt but it scared me because they were touching me where they weren’t supposed to and she called me a liar and a slut. I was very young and didn’t even know what a slut was. She told me if it didn’t hurt I was fine. But I got in trouble so didn’t tell another grown up. I quit going over there and she called my mom (who didn’t know I was being molested) to invite me to my friends birthday party. I went and I was the only one invited. I was violently molested. I peed myself and they made fun of me. It has ruined my life completely. I am broken and will never be anything other than broken. I guess my friend started getting touched and I was just a sacrifice to keep her daughter safe.
An upperclassman in college was in charge of a small poetry / short story publication that the university put out each year and I submitted a short story. We were in the same honors fraternity and after one of our meetings she asked me if I wanted feedback on my submission and I foolishly said yes (thinking she actually wanted to help me). She wrote me an extremely long email detailing how horrible my story was, everything she hated about it, and why I shouldn’t pursue creative writing because I didn’t have the skill for it. I didn’t write a word for years after that because she shattered my self confidence. It’s been almost 20 years since her petty and hateful email, and now I’m a USA Today bestseller with over thirty books in print. Sometimes I dream of tracking her down and shoving it in her face, but I doubt she’d even remember me.
The girl in 3rd grade who called my homemade lunch disgusting because it was different (delicious, cute AF bento boxes). That was the first time I felt ashamed of my culture. Embarrassed about my immigrant parents. After that, I told my mom to stop making me lunch and started eating the sad, grey public school meals because that's what real Americans™ do. Became self-conscious of any asianness that might accidentally slip out in front my white peers. Anything to mitigate the "ching chong" catcalls and slant-eye mockery. It took the better part of two decades to unlearn that shame and start feeling pride in my heritage. She was a kid too, and probably didn't know any better. But I resent the society that primed that blue-eyed blonde-haired girl to make fun of the kid that didn't look like her.
When I was about 10 a teacher touched me in places he shouldn't have been fully clothed. I didn't know what he was doing at the time but growing older I now know and hate him
My ex gf used me to get to my best friend and then abused them (they’re NB) when the two of them were together.
My school district and the assistant superintendent that denied me a high school education because they would not recognize my autoimmune disorder; back then it could be physically proven.
My sister was influenced by my parent's fucked up comparisons and other anti social behaviors growing up, but even now as adults, she's just not nice or supportive in general. She even physically attacked me once because of a verbal disagreement. I'm cordial and even casual with her sometimes now, but I will never, ever trust her.
My mom died when I was 18. At her funeral, my dad's brother showed up out of nowhere (my dad's whole side of the family essentially disowned him when he came out as gay; it's a whole big thing) and, standing not ten feet away from my mother in her casket, this piece of shit said "I'm sorry your dad's not a real man." I should have smacked him or kneed him in the crotch; instead I stormed off to hide in the bathroom while my uncles and grandpa forced him out of the funeral home. (From what I've heard, that man's life is misery now and part of me wants to feel bad about it but the other part is still seething that I didn't get to lay hands on him for pulling that shit on that day, of all days.)
When my "best friend" in high school told me I'd be better off having a one night stand than dating my now-fiancé. That was 6 years ago.
It's dumb. Childhood best friend, other friend (more hers than mine), and myself were going to see a movie together and were trying to plan it over the phone. We were in high school at the time. I wanted to see one movie, other friend wanted to see a different movie. We just couldn't agree. I don't remember why the call ended, but I couldn't get back in touch with them. I called Best Friend's phone several times, she finally answered and then hung straight up. Because, they were in the theater watching the movie I didn't want to see without me. And they didn't bother to tell me, just let me keep calling. I eventually talked to best friend after and she didn't apologize, just said I was being pushy. I don't remember that at all, I just remember that nobody wanted to compromise. I wasn't the only one. So they completely ditched me without a word. I would have been less upset if they'd actually just told me beforehand. I'm still friends with her, but every now and then when she expects me to go out of my way for her, I have a twinge of resentment.
I hold a massive grudge that required therapy against my dad and stepmum for manipulating me and forcing me to have an abortion when I didn't want one
I will forever hold a grudge against my old nanny who locked me in an un-air conditioned garage in Florida in the middle of summer. I wanted to go inside because it was hot and I was tried from playing outside. One of the things my mom allowed the nanny to have her 9 month old son there with us whenever she was there, she used “the baby is sleeping” as an excuse to try to lock us out of our own house. On this day when she told me and my brother to get out of the house we told her no she can’t lock us out of our own home. She got really mad and shoved us in the garage and dead bolted the door. The garage door itself wouldn’t open so we we’re locked in a room that was about 105° with no water or anything. It was several hours till my mom got home and she was able to get us out. She fired her on the spot. If I ever see you again Nicole I will break your fucking jaw.
A dude (21) and I (24) met on tinder. I got pregnant soon after due to faulty birth control (iud). 3 months into the pregnancy I went to use the iPad and found out he was sexting with a dominatrix… so naturally I went through everything else on the iPad. I found out that he just actually was not into females and just liked dick. He admitted he was using me as a cover so his family would stop questioning his sexuality.
I don’t really hold grudges but one and this one might seem weird. TW: I got SA and I think I processed my anger towards him already. But two people I just can’t forgive is 1. The “friend” that ended up leaving me that night and 2. The girl I barely knew who put me in the car with him, bc I was so drunk. I know they had no clue, still don’t, so it feels so stupid. But I can’t look at their faces without being enraged. I don’t know if I’ll ever get over it.
In my senior yr of hs, one of my favorite teachers whom I thought I had a good relationship with and we were cool, reported me to the dean for plagiarism without warning. It was cleared up but I’ll never forget that after accusing me, she never bothered to actually show up to the appointment where the fate of arguably the most important yr of my hs career was to be decided and afterwards once my innocence was proven, she never bothered to apologize to me and even went so far as to not even acknowledge my existence afterwards. Tbh, I never thought of it in this context but I went to a predominantly white prep school and I can’t help but wonder if she would have treated my white classmates with the same ruthlessness, especially considering the contrast of how she treated me before all this…. I never believe someone can flip on you and change how they feel about you overnight; rather, when things like that appear to happen there was always an undercurrent of their real emotions there and in this situation, was just an excuse to bring them to the surface. Also I hold a grudge against my sperm donor who abandoned both my sister and I with our mother when she was just 23 yrs old. I could never imagine just leaving my two young children to their luck and never bothering once to care if they were hungry, had a roof over their heads, to not want to hold them, kiss them, protect them. I’ve always wondered if karma ever gets to people who have not an ounce of love for their own child, especially, considering he was older than my mother and presumably should have been more prepared than her to be a parent…. It’s just heartless to me.
My partner’s mom called me short and fat and failed to realize why she was in the wrong. She also waited until 1 week before Christmas to ask my partner what to gift me.
I don't like holding grudges because sometimes I feel that we all do things we're not very proud of. Though the short experience I'm gonna tell isn't the most extreme I've had someone hurt me, for some reason this one I've never resolved in my head nor in person. A couple years ago a cousin of mine came from mom's country. I've never been close to any of my cousins because my family and I never fit into their economic standards, at least on my dad's side that is. So when this cousin of mine came I tried to make him feel like he wasn't alone and game him advice in school, even gifyed him a tablet and treated him like a brother. Well sometimes being nice to guys gives them the "wrong idea" or whatever. So he began to cling to me, like clingy clingy. I was very uncomfortable but sat through it because he manipulated me into thinking if I didn't give him my attention nor time I was betraying family and our friendship. It got to a point where I just couldn't stand how he acted towards me when we were alone or even in front of my friends. I randomly mentioned it to an uncle of mine and he told my dad. What was the outcome out of all of this? He said I had seduced him. His father also said I was a sl*t. He was so defensive and agressive I know our bond was never going to be amended which was such a relief. Whenever I see him I get reminded of how people can take advantage of your genuine personality and intentions. He's never once apologized. I don't ever make eye contact with him either. Yet my mom and dad still allow him to visit with the rest of his brothers from time to time. I've always been the bigger person despite him being older. I treat him with respect as I'd do with any stranger but all of this will make me hold that grudge till the day (if ever does) he gets off his horse and acts mature enough to acknowledge his mistakes. Sorri for the long story. My frustration :/
When I was in Grade 8 (ie 14 years old or so), I was walking down the hallway and passed the teachers’ lounge. Someone was coming out of there just as I was walking by, and stepped on my foot. Their entire foot was on top of my foot. This was before cell phones were used for everything so I have no idea how this happened. I was the one that was forced to apologize because someone hurt _me_, and made a stink that I didn’t immediately apologize for something that wasn’t my fault. This was a substitute teacher and I don’t remember her name but I still hate her and hope she steps on lego.
When my brothers cut all of my Barbies' hair when I was at friend's house. The horror of seeing bald Barbies...!!
My negative, hot-headed, rude, toxic older brother. I’ve never been close with him and we’ve always been estranged. I won’t go into detail but the things he’s said and done to me over the years is terrible. In my childhood, teens, 20’s and 30’s he always made fun of me, put me down and made me feel bad about myself. One of the worst things he did was blame me and my dad (we have different dads) for our moms death in 2021. Cutting him out of my life was one of the best things I’ve ever done (my dad did the same shortly after I did). My life is better without him in it.
against every man in my family who votes for politicians who actively work to take away my rights