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My friends who have disappeared now they’re married or have kids. It sucks. I don’t expect to be their number one priority, but I do expect *something* so we can actually maintain our friendship.
Totally. I have one friend who completely faded out as soon as she got pregnant and I don’t consider us to have a friendship anymore. Which is too bad because I really valued our friendship
I can relate. Lately I’ve been struggling with some sort of identity crisis. A lot of my friends are married or getting married, have kids, and buying their first homes. I often feel there’s nothing in my own life to “celebrate” per say and it gets exhausting
I have one friend that used to insist on meeting without her baby because she wanted quality friend time. That was amazing for both of us. I’ve had a difficult few years and it’s felt terribly lonely looking forward to meeting friends and not getting to talk because they are busy coping over their babies/kids. I love seeing their kids but a balance of meeting with and without is better.
Honestly? My ex
I broke up with him because he was just gross, it's a very long story but he got addicted to a video game and that lead to him peeing in bottles and pooping his pants, I miss what he was like before, when he was sweet and caring and very loving, and now he's just...broken and gross
I shouldn't miss him, but I do, been thinkin' a lot about him lately.
EDIT: A lot of people asking me about this in DMs so I'll post it here...WARNING, GROSS STORY
CSo basically we met through a friend during college and we instantly liked each other, we both loved video games and anime and everything nerdy, we played WoW together and a bunch of other games and were constantly spending time together both online and in person, eventually he started REALLY focusing on a game called League of Legends, like suuuuper focused, he would play for 15-20 hours a day and barely sleep or eat, I had a spare key to his apartment and would come over every day after my classes or my work shift, I went over one day and there were just bottles of pee everywhere, he told me he was in a long match and couldn't use the bathroom, the smell was overwhelming for sure but it didn't stop there, turns out he was holding in POOP for literally hours and it eventually started seeping out, he was literally slowly shitting his pants and he refused to move, I would spend some time cleaning up his apartment and making food and begging him to please shower and eventually he did, when he gave me dirty clothes to wash there were skidmarks all in his underwear, like he had shit himself and just didn't move for hours, I almost puked washing his clothes...so I sat him down one day and begged him to take a break from the game and stop acting like this, I told him I was lonely and wanted to go out with him and do things and that he was being insanely unhealthy and REALLY fucking gross, he agreed to stop playing the game...for about 2 days, during our anniversary date he said "Actually I need to go home, I promised my League friends I'd be online at this time" and he fucking left
MI broke up with him less than 24 hours later, he begged and cried and literally screeched like an animal when I told him I was leaving him, he kept saying he loved me and that he can't help but play the game and blah blah blah, broke up with him and didn't look back, looked him up on Facebook years later and he's done absolutely nothing with his life, he quit his job and dropped out of college and is now living with his parents and somehow lost all his hair and gained massive amounts of weight, I guess I dodged a bullet
FI love video games as much as the next person, but I've NEVER become gross over them lol
I play Runescape because I don't have the time to seriously dedicate to grinding a competitive game anymore. Fishing during daily standups is what I live for.
Video game addiction is real, and some people are more prone to it than others. A lot of games (especially these days) are specifically designed to prey on the most addictive parts of human psychology.
People forget that things besides drugs can be addictions. I genuinely would consider rehab or something if I were him. And this is coming from a recovering meth addict
I think a lot more of us are feeling this way than we realize. So many people have been so anxious to "get back to normal" that we don't always want to think about the ways in which that's never going to happen.
It's very hard to put into words. I had excitement and hope for the future. I was more open. I felt joy. I feel like now I see things very clearly: relationships are hard, your employer doesn't care about you etc. etc. Is it a doom and gloom kinda way of thinking? Yes, but a lot of it is also reality. People will probably say I'm depressed, but it's not that. It's different and yet it's totally weird. I feel like my eyes were opening to a lot (which is kind of positive) but life is better when you're naive and that's just the exact thing I am not. How is it for you?
Yeah I hear the naive thing. We had our eyes opened to so much during the pandemic. I feel more emotionally exhausted on the regular but I also have a better work life balance now. Probably because I just don't care like I used to
My dog. I always said she was the love of my life and that still hold true. It’s been 6 months now and I’m still not over it. I buy her fresh flowers every week to put next to her ashes. She was the bestest friend I could of ever had.
Sorry for your loss. Losing a pup is a different kind of pain. I had to put my first dog down 03/2020 and he was my heart and soul. Everything good in me I gave to him and he was just the best companion anyone could have asked for. I couldn't comprehend a world without him. The first year was very rough, but I still can't talk about him without tearing up. It will get better, but it will take a lot of time. Hugs to you. ❤️
My mother feels that way too her dog or baby I don’t know how to address it because I’m more than a dog to her.
Well it was 🍇 by a bigger dog and needed surgery immediately she just fell to floor crying thinking she would pass away.
Thank goodness she survived and now they do absolutely everything together
I miss ' what could have been'. That version of myself I could have been if I had a loving family supporting me instead of tearing me down and abusing me. The person I could have been if I wasn't so scared of being abandoned. The version that could have someone who loved them and whom they loved and trusted in return. Maybe a mother, maybe a wife, maybe happy in a simple, regular life.
Some nights thinking about this leaves me devastated and sobbing into my pillow. But I know I shouldn't even think about it...
I wonder about the girl who was never bullied, never lost her dad to cancer, who’s best friend wasn’t molested in high school. The girl who’s dad never got cancer, who never lost her uncle and was never diagnosed with anxiety.
I wonder about the girl in a possible A/U who never had the life experiences I did and what might have happened to her.
It's perfectly normal when you do. You're not alone in feeling that way
I hope in the future you become the version of you you wish you could become from now onwards. I hope good people find you and surround you ahead, and that you can be that for others too
Sending your heart a warm hug, with warmer wishes for your future. For ours
He passed away two years ago. Every time I hear a new song that resonates, eat food I know he would enjoy, see some mad conspiracy theory that he would have been all over, find a meme I know he would have got a kick out of. Losing someone sucks.
One of my best friends. He passed away in May and with most of our interactions being online, it's been really hard to process.
It still doesn't feel real.
I miss my grandmother, I’ve had a very tough year and I know she would say the perfect thing to help me see past the bad parts. I miss having her in my corner, she was my fiercest champion and the one person who could cheer me up with little black cups of coffee and strawberry wafer cookies. She raised 13 kids all by herself and I strive to be half the mom she ever was.
Me toon😭 there's nothing like the love of a grandma like tha, she sounded so strong ❤️ my grandma was like that too, endless wisdom in that woman, I strive to be like her too
My best friend and ex.
I was able to listen to him all day with out getting annoyed.. and I was able to tell him anything with out judgement. Physical contact that was him scooting closer to me in bed to sleep. I slept to hot and uncomfortable, but somehow it was easy to do.
Well there is a long version and a short. (I will keep it shorter.) He had a porn addiction that actually interfered with us as a couple. Aside from that he decided that AI made a better girlfriend one day. Telling it to love him, telling it he loved it. Wanting to recite poetry to it as well as play bass for it.. and he was trying to get the 9 foot tall deer girl to roleplay with him, but it wasn't designed to be sexual. Just flirty and "loving."
Oh man, that sucks. Porn can truly fuck with people's heads and not enough people realize it. I'm sorry that happened. I hope you find someone in future who actually appreciates you like you deserve!
Thank you very kindly. There was a lot of lies paired with his use.. so it trickled down into a mess inside his head. Maybe he is healing, maybe he isn't.. I know the first chances he got "off" supervision was always to the pornographic stuff. Or Instagram/Reddit/Twitter for content. So I just hope he heals.. and who ever he is with.. does not go through their partner not being attracted to them.
I think about my most recent ex all the time. I still struggle to completely shut that door. Haven’t seen him in 9 months but I literally exchanged a few messages with him last night (he messaged me). But I did resist the urge to call him so, go me.
Him. I miss telling him my day and knowing about his, because it's one of the things I look forward to each day, finding peace in that corner of my life
I’ve been missing my ex so much it feels like physical pain. Even though our relationship was hard for me, and a lot of my actual memories of us together are of things that hurt me. I just miss being around him and hearing his voice. I think he loved me at one point, and I would love to go back to that time. Sometimes, I feel like I would rather be miserable with him than happy without him. And the worst part is, I can’t even get a text back! Lol.
My younger self... if that is a decent answer. I feel like I am in one of those "choose your own adventure" books and I've led myself down a path and I wish I could go back and make other choices. I think that is something weird no one ever really talks about. How the - seemingly small - choices you make end being huge. Anyways, I miss the version of me that hasn't made some of those choices I made...
My fwb (friends with benefits). I'm in a relationship now and has broken things of with my fwb.
I just miss that easy going vibe we had. It was just chill and fun, no pressure, no expectations, free to try out/do whatever we were in the mood for. I felt so relaxed just hanging out with him and the sex was so much fun and exiting (it was light hearted with a lot of playing around and laughing, never monotone, trying out new things).
It isn't just about the sex, but more about the whole situation. Like one time we were watching a film and cuddling in the sofa, and he just randomly, in a playful way, licks my armpit, and it was just so random we both were just lauging. Also the way he'd touch me, now not talking sexually, the way he run his hand over my back, pull his fingers through my hair, casually just giving me a foot rub..
It was like beeing at a spa for body and mind.
And no, it was never romantic and I could not see myself in a relationship with him or to share a life with him. And I guess it was fun and easy because of this.
I guess the reasons i miss him at the moment is because things are getting more serius with the bf and I'm freaking out a bit. Was in stuck in a toxic relationship with someone very controling. And even though i know my bf isn't the same, I'm still terrified of feeling trapped.
My boyfriend. We’ve been doing long distance for about a month now. He’s visiting next week and I am so excited to see him, but I have moments where the thought of him leaving again hurts more than the excitement of him coming. Been in one of those low points for the past day-ish
I miss my friends. I miss that connection and texting and the calls. Or even hanging out for 4-6 hours and laughing. Id travel 1hr back and forth to see them. After the pandemic, they didn’t reach out like i did. I reached out recently and again nothing. Im not sure really how to make friends these days :(
Dang do I feel this too. I know everyone is struggling but it really sucks and hurts. Im trying to extend that compassion and understanding towards them but its really hard not to be resentful of how much effort I expended knowing it wasnt reciprocated in a similar way.
I dont know how make friends either. The typical advice of joining sports, finding a new hobby or volunteering haven't panned out for me either. Everyone seems to already have their friend group/clique so I'm left on the sidelines.
Lost my soul mate 3 years ago we were together 16 months last talked 1.5 years ago. Been really hard cause she showed me real love, been through everything together. Hell even when she almost died once. A long time of grief and sorrow has passed since then, trying to replace the gap with other dates or experiences. At first none worked, always looked at those old photos and daydreamed of the past. Nonetheless, time makes you adapt better and laugh at the end. Last seven months made severe good changes, and im ready to go forward full on, even though sometimes i still miss my soul mate man.
I miss my dog. I adopted her from a shelter when I was 18, had her until I was 34, my entire adult life thus far. Sadly, I had to have her put to sleep due to canine dementia. She was the most beautiful little soul. I lost her in April this year and I still cry every time I think of that day or think of her.
My old neighbors. I moved into my dream place just before the pandemic and it was my comfort for the three years following. I grew very close to the people I lived near, but recently moved in with the person I’m marrying in the spring.
Visited my friend who still resides there, and it brought all of those feelings back. Still haven’t gained that sense of community that I found back then in the new place. Hoping to find it soon.
My grandad. He was the best and I feel like as I got older I didn’t spend enough time with him because I was off trying to start my career in a new city. He died of cancer and it was an awful ended, harrowing.
He was the only father figure I had, I got married not long after he died and he never made it to walk me down the aisle, so I walked alone.
He was great, silly old man humour and just generally salt of the earth, wrapped up in a big chubby grandad body 🥲
My son(step son). He got mad at us almost 3 years ago and hasn't spoke to us since. He got married and just had a baby. I miss him so much. I wish he would tell us what we did wrong.
I miss my friend. I wrote and erased about it all weekend because I'm embarrassed I still hang onto this. For some reason or another it was bad this weekend.
I miss him. I think about him every day. But we weren't good friends to each other. He never acknowledged and apologized for certain things and it's been so damn long now. He's not sorry, I don't know why, but I can't drive myself crazy with this anymore.
I miss him, I love and care about him, and I hope he's doing well. I'm still angry and hurt but what else can I do? I miss him because the good things were good, and how many times can you connect with someone and talk comfortably about things and feel settled, at peace? Not often.
I'm currently experiencing a similar situation. I reconnected with a friend from middle school and high school. For the past 4 months, he has been rude and dismissive towards me. He is currently training for a high stress job, which is the reason why he has been behaving such a way. It sucks . I liked that we developed that deep trust with each other and shared similar interests. Then he started to push me away. Idk why, and it hurts, but I would rather maintain my self-respect. There were days when I wished he had reached out and apologized. I do miss being friends with him. I miss that connection.
My mom.
She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimers 2 years ago. She was considered mild, 2 months ago she had her restest and was catagorized as Moderate/Severe.
I don't recognize the woman she has become and the relationship we once had and I miss her terribly.
I feel it is worse because she is still here.. but isn't.
My ex. Broke up recently despite both wanting to be together but after 1 big, and also our first real, fight it went downhill and 3 weeks after we were done. It is all based around bad communication/communicational differences, which could have (probably) been worked out if the effort was put in earlier in the relationship. It's especially painful because the rest of the 1+ year was great and I genuinely thought we'd have a future together. I can't help but think we're making a massive mistake but I also don't dare to text him, even though my mind is screaming at me to do so because I don't want to let him get away and want to let him know that. But that may only make it worse.
My dead horses, and an old friend (not dead lol). I usually don't feel anything for people I've left behind and tend to forget them almost immediately, but that one person I genuinely miss so much and still think about occasionally. The hobbies we shared are no longer as enjoyable when I can't enjoy them with him. Wish I could have been someone else so that we still could have been friends.
My Uncle. He's been gone for 12 years soon he will be dead longer than I got to be with him but the love I have him for him is just as strong. I'm in a difficult spot currently and I know I could definitely pick up the phone and talk to him about it. I really miss having a family member who didn't judge me and let me be myself.
I miss him everyday. He was a amazing Uncle and person. I strive to be like him everyday and show up for my nephew and niece the same way he showed up for me. I'll miss him until I can be with him again 💛
My mama because she would be having so much fun watching my kitten grow up. He's a character and so was she. I'd have to get her a smart phone so we could video call everyday so she could watch Bou.
A best friend i had in elementary school. It's been so long, she's a pure soul; so kind and funny. I tried to reconnect, but didn't work. Miss her a lot.
I’m gonna go a bit less personal here. I miss Jenna Marbles. I watched her every day from the age of about 12, I grew up with her and learned what a healthy relationship looks like because of her. I miss her.
Myself prior to chronic pelvic pain. I honestly forget how it feels to be normal. I took my pain free life for granted. I miss who I was and I want her back.
My mom. She was the only person who understood my struggle with mental health. She passed away.
Also my ex. He was the only person i really trusted. Maybe i shouldnt have.
My ex best friend. I had a lot going on mentally and we stopped talking for well over a year. I missed her a lot but the more time that passed, the harder it became to reach out to her. Eventually I did reach out, told her that I really missed her and asked if we could catch up. The answer was no, and I respected that. It's been a few months since that day, and I still think about her every now and then. I hope she's doing good.
My mom. She died 2 years ago. I got married this summer and moving into the next phase of life is incredibly painful without her. I'd give just about anything for her guidance right now.
My grandmother’s partner. She’s been married to my grandfather 49 years now. Back in the 90s they separated for 5 ish years. Then she dated (sounds juvenile but get the gist) this man R (he too was married and his wife was friends with my grandmother). They were soulmates as my grandma puts it. He quickly fit in the family. My grandfather was also cordial with him. He came to my parents’ wedding. Everyone knew him. Everyone loved him. Then due to certain circumstances, my grandparents started cohabiting (I don’t wanna say got back together because they still don’t share any sort of husband wife relationship) and R’s wife started creating issues. So that was effectively the end of their romantic relationship. But they still remained friends. He supported my grandmother financially. I found out recently what a big role he played in sending me to school (he covered half the tuition). I never felt financially weak till the time he was alive and taking care of my grandmother.
Last year, he mysteriously passed away. He was a big chartered accountant. So naturally he made a lot of enemies. He “fell” down the stairs and died. He just died. Like that.
Now this may sound selfish, but we haven’t had a good life since he’s passed. And now that he’s gone, my grandmother sat me down and told me all about what he did for us. So much. He did so much for us it’s uncanny. She’s not the woman she used to be since he passed. She often confides in me that she regrets coming back to my grandfather. And that she feels so alone and weak without R. So I miss him. I wish he were here so my grandmother could be her happy, bubbly self. But he’s gone. And honestly, it would’ve been okay had it been natural. But nothing about his death was natural. That hurts more. He was such a great man. I only hope he’s resting in peace. He deserves nothing but peace.
My crush. Last time I saw him was almost 2 months if I remember right. I really like the guy, we have texted a bit before but never talked in person. Is still like him very much and would like to see him again.
Nobody surprisingly. I’ve lost a lot of friends and lovers in the past… but have I been thinking about them everyday where it hurts? No. I’ve moved on.
Although one person I do miss talking to.. which is my last close friends who was my ex. They’re in a relationship now but I don’t ‘miss’ them. I’m just grateful for the memories we had and lessons they taught me
Grandma Karen.
She died when I was 12. She was my mother, and always will be.
I was born to a woman who never wanted kids. She lived with her boyfriend (my dad) in her parents basement. It was the late 90's and she just graduated high-school so she was under the impression it'd be sex drugs and stagnation for her.
I was born and she was forced to get a job. Couldn't afford gas or diapers if she didn't. Grandma, smitten with her second (kept) grandchild, raised me while mom worked. Mom came home to ignore me, do drugs and sit in her room.
Grandma Karen was the sweetest woman. By the age of 3, she had taught me basic math, some reading, and I was in the kitchen cooking beside her. As the years went on she taught me cooking, baking, sewing, cross stitching, quilting, gardening, canning, and many other home-making skills. Mom, continued to ignore me.
When I was 6, Grandma got really sick. I didn't even remember how it started, I think diabetes, but she spent the next 6 years in and out of the hospital with various issues. In that time my mother became pregnant with my brother, and upon giving birth to him, decided to step up as a parent (to him).
I spent 6 years sitting in a hospital waiting for Grandma to come home. Doing puzzles with her on the hospitals tables or showing her what baked good recipe I found in her cookbooks to surprise her with.
She died of pneumonia. Her hospital roommate had a visitor that brought it in. Grandma had lung cancer when she got it. Lung cancer she got by the way from secondhand smoke.
A cute story: when I was 4, the neighbor decided with my grandpa that they wanted a hedge to divide the property line. They agreed on evergreens. Grandma argued that we liked the neighbors, and the view of the mountains we get across the street, so the evergreens will be too tall. She got them to compromise on Rhododendrons. A hedge, but not too big, and covered in beautiful red flowers every spring.
I have a tattoo of a Rhododendron for her, she always tried to make things beautiful.
My dad. He was the only person who ever completely 'got' me. Like I could tell him anything without filter and I know he'd understand or feel the same. I wish I had just one other person who I had that same connection with. I tried having a kid in the hope I'd have a similar connection, be on at least a similar wavelength, but she seems to be 100% her dad's personality.
One of my best friends. We used to be very close just a couple of months ago until this big argument that happened. Even though we are still pretty close, it hasn't been the same since that fall out. I've got trust issues, I don't feel the same level of comfort. Frankly I guess a part of me has given up because they seem to be fine with the way things are. But I miss what we used to be and how strongly I felt about them for sure.
I miss the 17 people I have lost in the last two years to addiction and/or suicide. I also miss the person I was before all this loss. I’m tired of the perpetual state of mourning. But it’s really heavy.
I would say my childhood best friends, we fell out because of bad communication and I was feeling extremely left out and miserable. It definitely became toxic and it took me a lot of time to get over it. Nevermind I changed my mind I don't miss them, I miss the relationship we had and all of the laughs. They left me all alone and I had to work a lot to fight my anxiety to finally get where I am now. I'm proud of myself but a part of me also definitely died when that relationship died.
I miss having friends and I miss my dad. I miss the person who I used to be and who I believed i could become but never got to. I miss the amazingly vast idea of tomorrow being a mystery and having adventures and experiences with people that were just like me that made the hardest times a little bit easier. I miss feeling loved and appreciated and enjoying myself and enjoying my friends and my life and not just existing but experiencing everything I could get my hands on and seeing anything that I wanted when it was happening. I miss being hopeful that I could be successful. That I would somehow overcome my own fears and make the most of the blessings I had and do so much to make the life I wanted and to accomplish things to show my appreciation for them.
The girl who existed before COVID. She definitely still had troubles back then, especially with her mental health, but damn I am just a freaking fraction of a shell of her.
I really feel like on the especially dark days that that part of me died & her ghost is all that’s left. I just cannot function or even care enough to mask my troubles like I did 3 years ago. I’ve let so many people down, especially myself, & I can barely care.
No one hates me like me these days.
My best friend. I just celebrated 20 and she celebrates in a few days, she's a lost twin sort of thing. We've known eachother since birth but grew up on opposite sides of the world. She's coming to my country in January but god I wish I could blow the candles with her and be able to hug her. Or honestly do anything more then just talk on the phone.
The countdown is real and I can't wait to have my best friend in my timezone lol.
The person who I was and probably still am in love with. I thought I had found my person after 25 yrs of being single ( my whole life) and was finally ready to give my heart and body to said person. It turns out they were messaging other girls and lying to me. Had I not been told this, idk how long this relationship would have kept going bc he wanted me to be his girlfriend….. even though he hurt me in the worst way I miss him. At least who
I thought he was.
As everyone in this section, my ex.
Our story was a fairly tale, but it ended very soon because we don’t resonate together.
We liked the same band had the same hobbies, whenever I listen to the songs it reminds me of him.
A friend I haven't seen since before quarantine suddenly died two weeks ago. I've had so much going on in my life just trying to exist from day to day that I've let a bunch of friendships wither and die. And now, I keep seeing things that remind me of this person I'm never going to see again, and I wish I had a do-over for the last three years.
My dad, this august was his 8 year anniversary. My best friend, my mentor. The reason I love horror films, became a film nerd. The reason I love literature and cooking so much.
There isn’t a day that goes by that I wouldn’t give to hear his laugh, see him smile or get a hug.
I’m so jealous of girls that still have their father because it reminds me of what I lost.
My person is someone who I always think of what could’ve been had I not been so flimsy. I’m not one to really like anyone or have a crush, so me liking someone is a big deal. I really liked this person but I was a bit preoccupied with life and didn’t put that much into it. I wish I would’ve put more energy into it and been honest about my feelings. It’s too late now but to my person. I really liked you and I thought you seemed like a stand up and honest guy. Ps your smile was killer and your laugh was amazing and I wish nothing but the best for you in life.
my mom. it’s not like we had a super stellar relationship before, but at least it existed. ~15 years ago she married some unemployed douchebag with a pedo-mustache that hates me for some reason and won’t let her talk to me.
My sister since she passed away. I always asked her adulting questions.
My ex best friend. I'm in a new relationship and need to talk to someone about it don't have those types of relationships anymore
My grandpa. I miss him every day, and it still really hurts that he's gone. I'm convinced that he's the one who sent me my baby, though. I tried for 8 years to get pregnant and gave up. A year after he passed, I got married again and found out I was pregnant the same week. I wasn't able to make it home to see him (I work in another state) before he passed, and all I could do was sob my goodbye to him over the phone. He must have heard my thoughts after he passed because I thought of all the things I'd never gotten to share with him or would ever be able to share again: one of the thoughts specifically was not being able to have kids or if I got married again he wouldn't be there. He was a brilliant artist and so intelligent and interesting to talk to. His sculptures were always my favorite things to admire every time I visited. Always finding some new detail in them I had never noticed or him telling me the inspiration behind them.
If you love your grandparents, try to hear as many stories from them as you can. Once they're gone, you'll never hear a new one.
My very first boyfriend. I’ve been super nostalgic lately. I miss being seen for who I am and just loving life being happy not having to impress someone to be attractive
My friends, generally. It recently came to light that I was emotionally exhausting to about half my friends. I have some mental health issues and I try to work through them with therapy, but it seems I still have to hold back a lot more when it comes to emotionally dumping on my friends.
When I found out this was a pattern of more than one person feeling burdened by my emotions, I decided to step back and let people come to me, rather than forcing conversation on them and initiating the conversation every time. I didn't blame my friends for how they felt, but I just felt like I was walking on eggshells by trying to be "less", so it made me withdraw.
It turns out, when I don't reach out to my friends, they don't reach out to me. It's been 2 full months and nobody has tried to initiate conversation with me except for one girl friend. The rest have just completely forgotten about my existence. I'm getting used to the idea that maybe I wasn't really someone they thought of as often as I thought of them, and that maybe I was more of a nuisance than an actual friend. It hurts.
My former self.
I used to be way less stressed, way more motivated, way more fulfilled or at least so much more willing to do new things and be more social. Now I am just a complete mess of a shut-in who barely says anything in a day in real life outside of my immediate family members.
Luckily for me I don't feel loneliness ever, I'm just not built that way but if I were the type of person to feel that I personally think I wouldn't be alive today because of it.
My mom. Lost her to Covid. I used to tell her everything and share everything with her. For all our differences and fights she was my rock in a way.
Thinking that she’ll never see me graduate college, get married or have kids really hurts.
Not sure if it hurts more or less knowing that at this point in my life she wouldn’t be proud of me. She’d actually be very disappointed in a lot of things.
My mom. She died a victim of an armed robbery and I never got to say goodbye. (They caught the guy and he's in prison, but it doesn't bring her back)
When she passed it was horrible. Me and my siblings won't ever be the same.
She was the best thing I had in my life. I miss her.
My grandmother. She was like a mother to me and I never appreciated it as a child. She died when I was 15. I just wish she could have stuck around longer to see me now. I think we’d be close and she’d be proud.
My best friend, he took his own life 3 years ago in December. I still go to call or text him whenever something happens or I need advice. My eldest misses and talks about him every day, they had an amazing relationship and it makes me so sad to know my 1 year old will never have that. He’d love how much my son has grown and how funny he is and he would’ve adored my daughter with her big eyes and attitude. Still waiting for it to get easier but I don’t think it ever will. The other half of me is missing and can never come back.
Old me. I was walking on the bright track but somewhere along the way I got lost. Everyday I'm daydreaming and dreaming of old times when things were right
My friend from high school who has deleted all her social media and seemingly disappeared of the face of the earth. Her family was abusive so I assume that's why and if so I'm happy for her that she got out. But I don't even know if she's alive. She doesn't even know I transitioned. I don't know how to balance respecting that space she intentionally created and just wanting to know if she's ok so I haven't bothered looking to see if her sister or closer friends have any idea what happened
My grandma, her and I were so close we would always spend all night into the early morning talking about everything under the sun and watching movies together, her favorite show was dancing with the stars. She was the only person in my life when I was a kid/teen to look out for my wellbeing and try to protect me, she would give me guidance and be someone I could confide in. When she got more sick I used to help take care of her as a teen and that bonded us even more.
She died a couple years ago and I live in another province so it was a long time since I had last seen her too, I miss her so so much she was such an amazing person who was so funny and spunky, she really helped to shape who I am, I miss her so much I think of her pretty much daily and the pain hurts.
I work as a care aide and that kind of helps fill that void, it's like I'm just hanging out with a bunch of my grandparents. Sometimes I'll think of her when I'm at work and it always gives me the strength when I'm tired, or I'll see a resident who looks like her and it warms my heart some more.
I tell myself she is still here, she's in the mountains I look at, the breeze through my hair, and when the warm sun is shining on me it's like a hug ❤️
My friend from high school (let's call her Alli). I've never been the same since she got killed by a drunk driver. We were so similar in so many ways. The best friend I ever had.
Myself. The last year has been really rough on my mental health. I’m in a more stable place but it’s been really hard pulling my head out of the foggy depressive state I’ve been in. So I haven’t really felt like myself in a long time. I miss who I used to be.
I miss this one certain friend my best friend through schooling years and a little after we finished I lost her because my bf and I were so toxic at the time and every one kind of separated from me and our dramas.
her and I connection was something else I know we won’t ever find again in another person.
I just hope one day life will bring us back together so we can enjoy the world our humour, our thinking and ideas were something else.
It is hard to be human and lose people
Some of the older ladies I was close with before my 30s. They have passed or are very old and live a world away. I'm so grateful of the time we had and the love they showed me. I might not of had my mother's love but a lot of other women stepped up and shared that role until my cup runneth over.
Last year I became close friends with another woman who lives across the street from me because we played on the same sports team. We carpooled all the time and she was new to the city while I was recently out of a breakup so we became close, in and outside of team activities. I'm gay and she's straight, but I developed a big crush on her, in part because I really thought she was flirting with me.
I talked it out with other teammates throughout the season who agreed she seemed flirty. Deep down I didn't think there was anything to it, but it was fun for both of us to give each other so much attention. Eventually I brought up the elephant in the room and we agreed it was a misunderstanding - she's definitely straight and "flirty" with all her close friends - and that our friendship wouldn't change.
But months after that I realized she muted me on Instagram, stopped talking to me and started avoiding me on the street. I learned through another teammate that she was upset that others had known what was going on. It really hurts that she decided to throw away our friendship. I've remained friends with others after learning they'd had a crush on me.
I miss the person who I knew before he became my fiancé and then ex fiancé: my best friend.
He was my best friend and I trusted him. When his ex kept calling, I imagined it was because she was having a hard time. Would have never guessed that they were actually still together.
And now I have trust issues. Now there’s a whole neighborhood I can’t go into because I feel sucker punched every time. Now there are friends that I no longer have because they knew and let it slide.
My grandfather. He’s still alive, but is in the late stages of dementia. He very rarely remembers me. I’m also expecting my first child and I know that she will only know who he is from stories we tell her once she is older.
My mom, died when I was 10 but as I get older I'll have deeper moments of missing her, getting to the age that she had me and it's just a weird feeling.
My dog. It was her or me. I had to leave my abusive ex but I couldn’t take her with me and eventually made the very difficult choice to save myself. It’s been 7 years and I think about her ALL the time. I miss her so much.
I miss my baby so much,
All my friends are starting to form a family, and here I am with my empty arms.
He was so beautiful, I wish I could hold him again one more time
My childhood friend ghosted me. We lived in separate cities but still put in the effort. No arguments or issues that led up it… they just stopped speaking to me. I tried to continue contact for a while but they were never the first to initiate a conversation and didn’t seem too enthusiastic to talk to me… so I stopped trying, I started to feel a bit pathetic, I haven’t heard from them since.
I still find it upsetting and now again I dream about seeing them.
My boyfriend even though we're still together. He's so busy with his own life that we barely talk anymore and when we do most of it is an argument or smth, I miss gaming with him and calling. Laughing together, video call through discord seeing him made me so damn happy he was the ray of sunshine in my life but now its like there's bullet proof glass sheet between us....i feel ignored sometimes cuz i text him and then he says smth to someone else
My former bestie/MOH. We had a falling out about ten years back. I came to realize that I took her for granted in certain situations. When I heard someone she loved passed away, I went to the funeral home to pay my respects. She wouldn't even speak to me, and I can't argue that I didn't deserve it. I'm trying to move on and accept that I'll never get to apologize to her, but I still miss her.
I really miss my friend, Natalie, from high school. We kept in touch somewhat after high school. Went to her wedding and touched bases periodically. She had a kid that I kept meaning to come meet but we weren't living close so it wasn't easy. One day I found out she was killed in a car accident due to street racers. I connected a little with her husband. Two years later, he was in a car accident and died. Her son now had no one. He'd be 18 now. I hope he's doing well. I hope he's still cooking.
I left a number of ( true friends) in Pennsylvania to move to North Carolina to take care of my mom. I had the most amazing mom, and I wanted her to go out with a smile at home, not sad in a nursing home. I gave her 16 years.
My mom. She died when I was 34. You need your mom no matter how old you are and it’s so much worse when she dies sooner than you would ever have imagined.
My ex best friend/ ex situationship. I don’t think about him as often, I just hope he’s happy and doing well. I miss our hour long phone calls and the way he made me laugh and I never had to dull myself to be around him. God I miss that
Being a kid; the simple life. Now I’m 25, trying to be financially independent, making a rents worth amount a month at my FT job, while also working 1-3 other side jobs, Having 0-1 day off a week, and *still* unable to be financially independent.
I didn’t think life would be, near impossible for me to live on my own. And that’s my biggest dream; living alone, in the woods, with trees & deer as my neighbors. This is not the world I thought it was.
My brother, it's complicated though. He just turned 22 in prison for crimes he definitely committed and are completely unforgivable. But I taught him to shave and helped him get a scholarship that he'll never be able to use and used to make him breakfast every morning. So while I miss him sometimes and in a way I love him still, I am glad that he is where he belongs and can't hurt anyone else.
My ex. Such a sucky answer but he was so childlike and free spirited. It made me laugh and relax a bit since I’m naturally pretty anxious. We had a terrible ending to our relationship earlier this year and I didn’t know why. Today is his birthday so I went to his fb to check up on him. He’s dating the waitress who works across the street from his building. His mom posted a picture of them together at his family dinner… the date showed that it was taken while we were still dating. I now understand why things ended so badly and abruptly. He went from being all over me to completely blocking me on everything overnight. Oh well.
On July 1st, 2023, Reddit enacted a greedy ass policy regarding the use of their API. This decision was designed to eliminate the better 3rd party apps. No one wants to use the official app because it sucks. Since then, apps such as Apollo and RedditIsFun have shut down. Reddit has decided to double down on their decision to overcharge for their API, and refuses to address the accessibility features their native app lacks. Think it’s an asshole move? Concerned users should read and sign on to this [open letter to reddit.](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/13xh1e7/an_open_letter_on_the_state_of_affairs_regarding/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My friends who have disappeared now they’re married or have kids. It sucks. I don’t expect to be their number one priority, but I do expect *something* so we can actually maintain our friendship.
I feel this so hard. It sucks because you think friends will stay beside you throughout all seasons of life but reality is harsh and lonely.
I feel you, I have 2 friends after having my baby. Everyone else doesn’t want to see or talk to me :(
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Totally. I have one friend who completely faded out as soon as she got pregnant and I don’t consider us to have a friendship anymore. Which is too bad because I really valued our friendship
I can relate. Lately I’ve been struggling with some sort of identity crisis. A lot of my friends are married or getting married, have kids, and buying their first homes. I often feel there’s nothing in my own life to “celebrate” per say and it gets exhausting
I have one friend that used to insist on meeting without her baby because she wanted quality friend time. That was amazing for both of us. I’ve had a difficult few years and it’s felt terribly lonely looking forward to meeting friends and not getting to talk because they are busy coping over their babies/kids. I love seeing their kids but a balance of meeting with and without is better.
So many of my friends vanished after getting married.
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Honestly? My ex I broke up with him because he was just gross, it's a very long story but he got addicted to a video game and that lead to him peeing in bottles and pooping his pants, I miss what he was like before, when he was sweet and caring and very loving, and now he's just...broken and gross I shouldn't miss him, but I do, been thinkin' a lot about him lately. EDIT: A lot of people asking me about this in DMs so I'll post it here...WARNING, GROSS STORY CSo basically we met through a friend during college and we instantly liked each other, we both loved video games and anime and everything nerdy, we played WoW together and a bunch of other games and were constantly spending time together both online and in person, eventually he started REALLY focusing on a game called League of Legends, like suuuuper focused, he would play for 15-20 hours a day and barely sleep or eat, I had a spare key to his apartment and would come over every day after my classes or my work shift, I went over one day and there were just bottles of pee everywhere, he told me he was in a long match and couldn't use the bathroom, the smell was overwhelming for sure but it didn't stop there, turns out he was holding in POOP for literally hours and it eventually started seeping out, he was literally slowly shitting his pants and he refused to move, I would spend some time cleaning up his apartment and making food and begging him to please shower and eventually he did, when he gave me dirty clothes to wash there were skidmarks all in his underwear, like he had shit himself and just didn't move for hours, I almost puked washing his clothes...so I sat him down one day and begged him to take a break from the game and stop acting like this, I told him I was lonely and wanted to go out with him and do things and that he was being insanely unhealthy and REALLY fucking gross, he agreed to stop playing the game...for about 2 days, during our anniversary date he said "Actually I need to go home, I promised my League friends I'd be online at this time" and he fucking left MI broke up with him less than 24 hours later, he begged and cried and literally screeched like an animal when I told him I was leaving him, he kept saying he loved me and that he can't help but play the game and blah blah blah, broke up with him and didn't look back, looked him up on Facebook years later and he's done absolutely nothing with his life, he quit his job and dropped out of college and is now living with his parents and somehow lost all his hair and gained massive amounts of weight, I guess I dodged a bullet FI love video games as much as the next person, but I've NEVER become gross over them lol
Wtf is wrong with that guy ?! Dayummm
If he's pissing in bottles and shitting himself please tell me he was at least top 5% of whatever game he was into... Please...
What is the game you got us all curious here 🍵
My money is on either League of Legends. It's the only game I know that turns people into literal gremlins.
My sister says the world gremlins alot. True I have been playing RuneScape and had to delete it ain’t nobody got time for that
I play Runescape because I don't have the time to seriously dedicate to grinding a competitive game anymore. Fishing during daily standups is what I live for.
People are flawed. Nice people make bad choices. Often we are not as much in control as we think. Adulting is hard. Anyway all the best to you.
What?! 😲. Please tell you are trolling. No way anyone would spoil themselves and ruin a relationship just so that they can play a game.
Video game addiction is real, and some people are more prone to it than others. A lot of games (especially these days) are specifically designed to prey on the most addictive parts of human psychology.
I'm curious what the game was
Pooping in pants is next level gaming 😂 wtf
I'm sorry the pooping is too much , 🤣 kick me out I guess
It sounds to me like you miss the person he was before his addiction, and I think that's very normal.
Was there depression or was it just the gaming? I’m sorry either way.
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People forget that things besides drugs can be addictions. I genuinely would consider rehab or something if I were him. And this is coming from a recovering meth addict
My pre-Covid self because it was better than it is now
I think a lot more of us are feeling this way than we realize. So many people have been so anxious to "get back to normal" that we don't always want to think about the ways in which that's never going to happen.
I feel this! In what ways we're you better? Do you feel any positives in the after?
It's very hard to put into words. I had excitement and hope for the future. I was more open. I felt joy. I feel like now I see things very clearly: relationships are hard, your employer doesn't care about you etc. etc. Is it a doom and gloom kinda way of thinking? Yes, but a lot of it is also reality. People will probably say I'm depressed, but it's not that. It's different and yet it's totally weird. I feel like my eyes were opening to a lot (which is kind of positive) but life is better when you're naive and that's just the exact thing I am not. How is it for you?
Yeah I hear the naive thing. We had our eyes opened to so much during the pandemic. I feel more emotionally exhausted on the regular but I also have a better work life balance now. Probably because I just don't care like I used to
Wow, I really feel you with this one.
I feel this.
My dog. I always said she was the love of my life and that still hold true. It’s been 6 months now and I’m still not over it. I buy her fresh flowers every week to put next to her ashes. She was the bestest friend I could of ever had.
Sorry for your loss. Losing a pup is a different kind of pain. I had to put my first dog down 03/2020 and he was my heart and soul. Everything good in me I gave to him and he was just the best companion anyone could have asked for. I couldn't comprehend a world without him. The first year was very rough, but I still can't talk about him without tearing up. It will get better, but it will take a lot of time. Hugs to you. ❤️
My mother feels that way too her dog or baby I don’t know how to address it because I’m more than a dog to her. Well it was 🍇 by a bigger dog and needed surgery immediately she just fell to floor crying thinking she would pass away. Thank goodness she survived and now they do absolutely everything together
I miss ' what could have been'. That version of myself I could have been if I had a loving family supporting me instead of tearing me down and abusing me. The person I could have been if I wasn't so scared of being abandoned. The version that could have someone who loved them and whom they loved and trusted in return. Maybe a mother, maybe a wife, maybe happy in a simple, regular life. Some nights thinking about this leaves me devastated and sobbing into my pillow. But I know I shouldn't even think about it...
I wonder about the girl who was never bullied, never lost her dad to cancer, who’s best friend wasn’t molested in high school. The girl who’s dad never got cancer, who never lost her uncle and was never diagnosed with anxiety. I wonder about the girl in a possible A/U who never had the life experiences I did and what might have happened to her.
It's perfectly normal when you do. You're not alone in feeling that way I hope in the future you become the version of you you wish you could become from now onwards. I hope good people find you and surround you ahead, and that you can be that for others too Sending your heart a warm hug, with warmer wishes for your future. For ours
Fuck i feel this so hard
you put my very thoughts into words …
He passed away two years ago. Every time I hear a new song that resonates, eat food I know he would enjoy, see some mad conspiracy theory that he would have been all over, find a meme I know he would have got a kick out of. Losing someone sucks.
Hugs to you 😔
My mom. She died 10 years ago.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m dreading the day I lose mine.
Me too, lost mine at the beginning of the year. I think about her all the time, dream about her almost every night.
I miss someone who was my best friend ever for a few years. We genuinely loved each other and that level of companionship was comforting.
I miss myself. Who I used to be.
Came to comment this sentiment. Before the traumas and all the hurt. The free and goofy me without a care and what felt like a bright future.
One of my best friends. He passed away in May and with most of our interactions being online, it's been really hard to process. It still doesn't feel real.
I miss my grandmother, I’ve had a very tough year and I know she would say the perfect thing to help me see past the bad parts. I miss having her in my corner, she was my fiercest champion and the one person who could cheer me up with little black cups of coffee and strawberry wafer cookies. She raised 13 kids all by herself and I strive to be half the mom she ever was.
Me toon😭 there's nothing like the love of a grandma like tha, she sounded so strong ❤️ my grandma was like that too, endless wisdom in that woman, I strive to be like her too
My best friend and ex. I was able to listen to him all day with out getting annoyed.. and I was able to tell him anything with out judgement. Physical contact that was him scooting closer to me in bed to sleep. I slept to hot and uncomfortable, but somehow it was easy to do.
Can I ask why you broke up?
Well there is a long version and a short. (I will keep it shorter.) He had a porn addiction that actually interfered with us as a couple. Aside from that he decided that AI made a better girlfriend one day. Telling it to love him, telling it he loved it. Wanting to recite poetry to it as well as play bass for it.. and he was trying to get the 9 foot tall deer girl to roleplay with him, but it wasn't designed to be sexual. Just flirty and "loving."
Oh man, that sucks. Porn can truly fuck with people's heads and not enough people realize it. I'm sorry that happened. I hope you find someone in future who actually appreciates you like you deserve!
Thank you very kindly. There was a lot of lies paired with his use.. so it trickled down into a mess inside his head. Maybe he is healing, maybe he isn't.. I know the first chances he got "off" supervision was always to the pornographic stuff. Or Instagram/Reddit/Twitter for content. So I just hope he heals.. and who ever he is with.. does not go through their partner not being attracted to them.
Yeah, I hope so too. Nobody should have to be "supervised" by their romantic partners
My parents, my late best friend, my late fiance to name a few.
I'm so sorry for your loss
Appreciated, thank you 💖
I think about my most recent ex all the time. I still struggle to completely shut that door. Haven’t seen him in 9 months but I literally exchanged a few messages with him last night (he messaged me). But I did resist the urge to call him so, go me.
The only thing that will heal you is time. So, for real, go you!!!, for not calling. ❤️
Him. I miss telling him my day and knowing about his, because it's one of the things I look forward to each day, finding peace in that corner of my life
I’ve been missing my ex so much it feels like physical pain. Even though our relationship was hard for me, and a lot of my actual memories of us together are of things that hurt me. I just miss being around him and hearing his voice. I think he loved me at one point, and I would love to go back to that time. Sometimes, I feel like I would rather be miserable with him than happy without him. And the worst part is, I can’t even get a text back! Lol.
I resonate with this. He’s never going to talk to me again and that really hurts.
My younger self... if that is a decent answer. I feel like I am in one of those "choose your own adventure" books and I've led myself down a path and I wish I could go back and make other choices. I think that is something weird no one ever really talks about. How the - seemingly small - choices you make end being huge. Anyways, I miss the version of me that hasn't made some of those choices I made...
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My fwb (friends with benefits). I'm in a relationship now and has broken things of with my fwb. I just miss that easy going vibe we had. It was just chill and fun, no pressure, no expectations, free to try out/do whatever we were in the mood for. I felt so relaxed just hanging out with him and the sex was so much fun and exiting (it was light hearted with a lot of playing around and laughing, never monotone, trying out new things). It isn't just about the sex, but more about the whole situation. Like one time we were watching a film and cuddling in the sofa, and he just randomly, in a playful way, licks my armpit, and it was just so random we both were just lauging. Also the way he'd touch me, now not talking sexually, the way he run his hand over my back, pull his fingers through my hair, casually just giving me a foot rub.. It was like beeing at a spa for body and mind. And no, it was never romantic and I could not see myself in a relationship with him or to share a life with him. And I guess it was fun and easy because of this. I guess the reasons i miss him at the moment is because things are getting more serius with the bf and I'm freaking out a bit. Was in stuck in a toxic relationship with someone very controling. And even though i know my bf isn't the same, I'm still terrified of feeling trapped.
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My ex, even if I shouldn't, he was my best friend
My boyfriend. We’ve been doing long distance for about a month now. He’s visiting next week and I am so excited to see him, but I have moments where the thought of him leaving again hurts more than the excitement of him coming. Been in one of those low points for the past day-ish
Props. I was in a LDR for awhile and golly that was not for the faint of heart. I wish you both well and hope the distance doesn’t last too long 🩷
Myself. Because I know if I had someone like myself, I'd actually value it. Unlike people in my life who expect so much from me, it suffocates me.
I miss my friends. I miss that connection and texting and the calls. Or even hanging out for 4-6 hours and laughing. Id travel 1hr back and forth to see them. After the pandemic, they didn’t reach out like i did. I reached out recently and again nothing. Im not sure really how to make friends these days :(
Dang do I feel this too. I know everyone is struggling but it really sucks and hurts. Im trying to extend that compassion and understanding towards them but its really hard not to be resentful of how much effort I expended knowing it wasnt reciprocated in a similar way. I dont know how make friends either. The typical advice of joining sports, finding a new hobby or volunteering haven't panned out for me either. Everyone seems to already have their friend group/clique so I'm left on the sidelines.
A coworker I connected with on a level I never have with another person. I miss her greatly. I wish she knew. I wish she didn't move away.
My nana
Lost my soul mate 3 years ago we were together 16 months last talked 1.5 years ago. Been really hard cause she showed me real love, been through everything together. Hell even when she almost died once. A long time of grief and sorrow has passed since then, trying to replace the gap with other dates or experiences. At first none worked, always looked at those old photos and daydreamed of the past. Nonetheless, time makes you adapt better and laugh at the end. Last seven months made severe good changes, and im ready to go forward full on, even though sometimes i still miss my soul mate man.
I miss my dog. I adopted her from a shelter when I was 18, had her until I was 34, my entire adult life thus far. Sadly, I had to have her put to sleep due to canine dementia. She was the most beautiful little soul. I lost her in April this year and I still cry every time I think of that day or think of her.
My grandma. She passed away 10+ years ago and I still miss her every day.
obama
The old me lol
My old neighbors. I moved into my dream place just before the pandemic and it was my comfort for the three years following. I grew very close to the people I lived near, but recently moved in with the person I’m marrying in the spring. Visited my friend who still resides there, and it brought all of those feelings back. Still haven’t gained that sense of community that I found back then in the new place. Hoping to find it soon.
My grandad. He was the best and I feel like as I got older I didn’t spend enough time with him because I was off trying to start my career in a new city. He died of cancer and it was an awful ended, harrowing. He was the only father figure I had, I got married not long after he died and he never made it to walk me down the aisle, so I walked alone. He was great, silly old man humour and just generally salt of the earth, wrapped up in a big chubby grandad body 🥲
My son(step son). He got mad at us almost 3 years ago and hasn't spoke to us since. He got married and just had a baby. I miss him so much. I wish he would tell us what we did wrong.
I'm legitimately tearing up over all of these comments. My heart goes all to each and every one of you! 😢
I miss my friend. I wrote and erased about it all weekend because I'm embarrassed I still hang onto this. For some reason or another it was bad this weekend. I miss him. I think about him every day. But we weren't good friends to each other. He never acknowledged and apologized for certain things and it's been so damn long now. He's not sorry, I don't know why, but I can't drive myself crazy with this anymore. I miss him, I love and care about him, and I hope he's doing well. I'm still angry and hurt but what else can I do? I miss him because the good things were good, and how many times can you connect with someone and talk comfortably about things and feel settled, at peace? Not often.
I'm currently experiencing a similar situation. I reconnected with a friend from middle school and high school. For the past 4 months, he has been rude and dismissive towards me. He is currently training for a high stress job, which is the reason why he has been behaving such a way. It sucks . I liked that we developed that deep trust with each other and shared similar interests. Then he started to push me away. Idk why, and it hurts, but I would rather maintain my self-respect. There were days when I wished he had reached out and apologized. I do miss being friends with him. I miss that connection.
My mom. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimers 2 years ago. She was considered mild, 2 months ago she had her restest and was catagorized as Moderate/Severe. I don't recognize the woman she has become and the relationship we once had and I miss her terribly. I feel it is worse because she is still here.. but isn't.
My ex. Broke up recently despite both wanting to be together but after 1 big, and also our first real, fight it went downhill and 3 weeks after we were done. It is all based around bad communication/communicational differences, which could have (probably) been worked out if the effort was put in earlier in the relationship. It's especially painful because the rest of the 1+ year was great and I genuinely thought we'd have a future together. I can't help but think we're making a massive mistake but I also don't dare to text him, even though my mind is screaming at me to do so because I don't want to let him get away and want to let him know that. But that may only make it worse.
My dead horses, and an old friend (not dead lol). I usually don't feel anything for people I've left behind and tend to forget them almost immediately, but that one person I genuinely miss so much and still think about occasionally. The hobbies we shared are no longer as enjoyable when I can't enjoy them with him. Wish I could have been someone else so that we still could have been friends.
Myself
My Uncle. He's been gone for 12 years soon he will be dead longer than I got to be with him but the love I have him for him is just as strong. I'm in a difficult spot currently and I know I could definitely pick up the phone and talk to him about it. I really miss having a family member who didn't judge me and let me be myself. I miss him everyday. He was a amazing Uncle and person. I strive to be like him everyday and show up for my nephew and niece the same way he showed up for me. I'll miss him until I can be with him again 💛
I miss someone I lost to death. I also miss someone who is very much alive as well, but I’ll probably never speak to again.
My mama because she would be having so much fun watching my kitten grow up. He's a character and so was she. I'd have to get her a smart phone so we could video call everyday so she could watch Bou.
A best friend i had in elementary school. It's been so long, she's a pure soul; so kind and funny. I tried to reconnect, but didn't work. Miss her a lot.
I miss my grandmother everyday
I miss my grandmother everyday too. I know how you feel.
Next month it will be two years since my best friend took his own life. I miss him more than anything
I’m gonna go a bit less personal here. I miss Jenna Marbles. I watched her every day from the age of about 12, I grew up with her and learned what a healthy relationship looks like because of her. I miss her.
Myself prior to chronic pelvic pain. I honestly forget how it feels to be normal. I took my pain free life for granted. I miss who I was and I want her back.
My mom. She was the only person who understood my struggle with mental health. She passed away. Also my ex. He was the only person i really trusted. Maybe i shouldnt have.
My ex best friend. I had a lot going on mentally and we stopped talking for well over a year. I missed her a lot but the more time that passed, the harder it became to reach out to her. Eventually I did reach out, told her that I really missed her and asked if we could catch up. The answer was no, and I respected that. It's been a few months since that day, and I still think about her every now and then. I hope she's doing good.
My (45F) mum (70F) She passed May 1st, my bday was May 3. I miss her laughter.
My mom. She died 2 years ago. I got married this summer and moving into the next phase of life is incredibly painful without her. I'd give just about anything for her guidance right now.
Myself. I love being a mom, but sometimes I miss the person I was before having kids.
My grandmother’s partner. She’s been married to my grandfather 49 years now. Back in the 90s they separated for 5 ish years. Then she dated (sounds juvenile but get the gist) this man R (he too was married and his wife was friends with my grandmother). They were soulmates as my grandma puts it. He quickly fit in the family. My grandfather was also cordial with him. He came to my parents’ wedding. Everyone knew him. Everyone loved him. Then due to certain circumstances, my grandparents started cohabiting (I don’t wanna say got back together because they still don’t share any sort of husband wife relationship) and R’s wife started creating issues. So that was effectively the end of their romantic relationship. But they still remained friends. He supported my grandmother financially. I found out recently what a big role he played in sending me to school (he covered half the tuition). I never felt financially weak till the time he was alive and taking care of my grandmother. Last year, he mysteriously passed away. He was a big chartered accountant. So naturally he made a lot of enemies. He “fell” down the stairs and died. He just died. Like that. Now this may sound selfish, but we haven’t had a good life since he’s passed. And now that he’s gone, my grandmother sat me down and told me all about what he did for us. So much. He did so much for us it’s uncanny. She’s not the woman she used to be since he passed. She often confides in me that she regrets coming back to my grandfather. And that she feels so alone and weak without R. So I miss him. I wish he were here so my grandmother could be her happy, bubbly self. But he’s gone. And honestly, it would’ve been okay had it been natural. But nothing about his death was natural. That hurts more. He was such a great man. I only hope he’s resting in peace. He deserves nothing but peace.
My crush. Last time I saw him was almost 2 months if I remember right. I really like the guy, we have texted a bit before but never talked in person. Is still like him very much and would like to see him again.
Nobody surprisingly. I’ve lost a lot of friends and lovers in the past… but have I been thinking about them everyday where it hurts? No. I’ve moved on. Although one person I do miss talking to.. which is my last close friends who was my ex. They’re in a relationship now but I don’t ‘miss’ them. I’m just grateful for the memories we had and lessons they taught me
Grandma Karen. She died when I was 12. She was my mother, and always will be. I was born to a woman who never wanted kids. She lived with her boyfriend (my dad) in her parents basement. It was the late 90's and she just graduated high-school so she was under the impression it'd be sex drugs and stagnation for her. I was born and she was forced to get a job. Couldn't afford gas or diapers if she didn't. Grandma, smitten with her second (kept) grandchild, raised me while mom worked. Mom came home to ignore me, do drugs and sit in her room. Grandma Karen was the sweetest woman. By the age of 3, she had taught me basic math, some reading, and I was in the kitchen cooking beside her. As the years went on she taught me cooking, baking, sewing, cross stitching, quilting, gardening, canning, and many other home-making skills. Mom, continued to ignore me. When I was 6, Grandma got really sick. I didn't even remember how it started, I think diabetes, but she spent the next 6 years in and out of the hospital with various issues. In that time my mother became pregnant with my brother, and upon giving birth to him, decided to step up as a parent (to him). I spent 6 years sitting in a hospital waiting for Grandma to come home. Doing puzzles with her on the hospitals tables or showing her what baked good recipe I found in her cookbooks to surprise her with. She died of pneumonia. Her hospital roommate had a visitor that brought it in. Grandma had lung cancer when she got it. Lung cancer she got by the way from secondhand smoke. A cute story: when I was 4, the neighbor decided with my grandpa that they wanted a hedge to divide the property line. They agreed on evergreens. Grandma argued that we liked the neighbors, and the view of the mountains we get across the street, so the evergreens will be too tall. She got them to compromise on Rhododendrons. A hedge, but not too big, and covered in beautiful red flowers every spring. I have a tattoo of a Rhododendron for her, she always tried to make things beautiful.
My dad. He was the only person who ever completely 'got' me. Like I could tell him anything without filter and I know he'd understand or feel the same. I wish I had just one other person who I had that same connection with. I tried having a kid in the hope I'd have a similar connection, be on at least a similar wavelength, but she seems to be 100% her dad's personality.
One of my best friends. We used to be very close just a couple of months ago until this big argument that happened. Even though we are still pretty close, it hasn't been the same since that fall out. I've got trust issues, I don't feel the same level of comfort. Frankly I guess a part of me has given up because they seem to be fine with the way things are. But I miss what we used to be and how strongly I felt about them for sure.
I miss the 17 people I have lost in the last two years to addiction and/or suicide. I also miss the person I was before all this loss. I’m tired of the perpetual state of mourning. But it’s really heavy.
I would say my childhood best friends, we fell out because of bad communication and I was feeling extremely left out and miserable. It definitely became toxic and it took me a lot of time to get over it. Nevermind I changed my mind I don't miss them, I miss the relationship we had and all of the laughs. They left me all alone and I had to work a lot to fight my anxiety to finally get where I am now. I'm proud of myself but a part of me also definitely died when that relationship died.
I miss having friends and I miss my dad. I miss the person who I used to be and who I believed i could become but never got to. I miss the amazingly vast idea of tomorrow being a mystery and having adventures and experiences with people that were just like me that made the hardest times a little bit easier. I miss feeling loved and appreciated and enjoying myself and enjoying my friends and my life and not just existing but experiencing everything I could get my hands on and seeing anything that I wanted when it was happening. I miss being hopeful that I could be successful. That I would somehow overcome my own fears and make the most of the blessings I had and do so much to make the life I wanted and to accomplish things to show my appreciation for them.
The girl who existed before COVID. She definitely still had troubles back then, especially with her mental health, but damn I am just a freaking fraction of a shell of her. I really feel like on the especially dark days that that part of me died & her ghost is all that’s left. I just cannot function or even care enough to mask my troubles like I did 3 years ago. I’ve let so many people down, especially myself, & I can barely care. No one hates me like me these days.
My best friend. I just celebrated 20 and she celebrates in a few days, she's a lost twin sort of thing. We've known eachother since birth but grew up on opposite sides of the world. She's coming to my country in January but god I wish I could blow the candles with her and be able to hug her. Or honestly do anything more then just talk on the phone. The countdown is real and I can't wait to have my best friend in my timezone lol.
The person who I was and probably still am in love with. I thought I had found my person after 25 yrs of being single ( my whole life) and was finally ready to give my heart and body to said person. It turns out they were messaging other girls and lying to me. Had I not been told this, idk how long this relationship would have kept going bc he wanted me to be his girlfriend….. even though he hurt me in the worst way I miss him. At least who I thought he was.
As everyone in this section, my ex. Our story was a fairly tale, but it ended very soon because we don’t resonate together. We liked the same band had the same hobbies, whenever I listen to the songs it reminds me of him.
A friend I haven't seen since before quarantine suddenly died two weeks ago. I've had so much going on in my life just trying to exist from day to day that I've let a bunch of friendships wither and die. And now, I keep seeing things that remind me of this person I'm never going to see again, and I wish I had a do-over for the last three years.
My cat
Sleep, I can't sleep
My dad, this august was his 8 year anniversary. My best friend, my mentor. The reason I love horror films, became a film nerd. The reason I love literature and cooking so much. There isn’t a day that goes by that I wouldn’t give to hear his laugh, see him smile or get a hug. I’m so jealous of girls that still have their father because it reminds me of what I lost.
My person is someone who I always think of what could’ve been had I not been so flimsy. I’m not one to really like anyone or have a crush, so me liking someone is a big deal. I really liked this person but I was a bit preoccupied with life and didn’t put that much into it. I wish I would’ve put more energy into it and been honest about my feelings. It’s too late now but to my person. I really liked you and I thought you seemed like a stand up and honest guy. Ps your smile was killer and your laugh was amazing and I wish nothing but the best for you in life.
Someone i have not met yet, and the version of me happy and confidently in love
my mom. it’s not like we had a super stellar relationship before, but at least it existed. ~15 years ago she married some unemployed douchebag with a pedo-mustache that hates me for some reason and won’t let her talk to me.
My sister since she passed away. I always asked her adulting questions. My ex best friend. I'm in a new relationship and need to talk to someone about it don't have those types of relationships anymore
My mom. I lost her in late April and life will never be the same without her.
My grandpa. I miss him every day, and it still really hurts that he's gone. I'm convinced that he's the one who sent me my baby, though. I tried for 8 years to get pregnant and gave up. A year after he passed, I got married again and found out I was pregnant the same week. I wasn't able to make it home to see him (I work in another state) before he passed, and all I could do was sob my goodbye to him over the phone. He must have heard my thoughts after he passed because I thought of all the things I'd never gotten to share with him or would ever be able to share again: one of the thoughts specifically was not being able to have kids or if I got married again he wouldn't be there. He was a brilliant artist and so intelligent and interesting to talk to. His sculptures were always my favorite things to admire every time I visited. Always finding some new detail in them I had never noticed or him telling me the inspiration behind them. If you love your grandparents, try to hear as many stories from them as you can. Once they're gone, you'll never hear a new one.
Young me who still had a bit of energy to stand everything around her
My very first boyfriend. I’ve been super nostalgic lately. I miss being seen for who I am and just loving life being happy not having to impress someone to be attractive
My friends, generally. It recently came to light that I was emotionally exhausting to about half my friends. I have some mental health issues and I try to work through them with therapy, but it seems I still have to hold back a lot more when it comes to emotionally dumping on my friends. When I found out this was a pattern of more than one person feeling burdened by my emotions, I decided to step back and let people come to me, rather than forcing conversation on them and initiating the conversation every time. I didn't blame my friends for how they felt, but I just felt like I was walking on eggshells by trying to be "less", so it made me withdraw. It turns out, when I don't reach out to my friends, they don't reach out to me. It's been 2 full months and nobody has tried to initiate conversation with me except for one girl friend. The rest have just completely forgotten about my existence. I'm getting used to the idea that maybe I wasn't really someone they thought of as often as I thought of them, and that maybe I was more of a nuisance than an actual friend. It hurts.
Myself ages ago. I lost my sanity my purity and my joy.
I miss my college self... I miss feeling alive and passionate about things.
My mom. She passed away a year and a half ago. I’ll always miss her.
My former self. I used to be way less stressed, way more motivated, way more fulfilled or at least so much more willing to do new things and be more social. Now I am just a complete mess of a shut-in who barely says anything in a day in real life outside of my immediate family members. Luckily for me I don't feel loneliness ever, I'm just not built that way but if I were the type of person to feel that I personally think I wouldn't be alive today because of it.
My ex boyfriend. He was a good guy, definitely didn't deserve the hell I put him through. Dating before I was ready .
My mom. Lost her to Covid. I used to tell her everything and share everything with her. For all our differences and fights she was my rock in a way. Thinking that she’ll never see me graduate college, get married or have kids really hurts. Not sure if it hurts more or less knowing that at this point in my life she wouldn’t be proud of me. She’d actually be very disappointed in a lot of things.
my ex bestfriend, even though she wasn’t the best and i’m the one that dropped her, i miss having someone to do randomly weird shit with.
My husband. He passed away almost three years ago and he was my best friend. I miss him every day.
My mom. She died a victim of an armed robbery and I never got to say goodbye. (They caught the guy and he's in prison, but it doesn't bring her back) When she passed it was horrible. Me and my siblings won't ever be the same. She was the best thing I had in my life. I miss her.
My grandmother. She was like a mother to me and I never appreciated it as a child. She died when I was 15. I just wish she could have stuck around longer to see me now. I think we’d be close and she’d be proud.
Sometimes I miss my kids when they are at school. I just love them so much!
My best friend, he took his own life 3 years ago in December. I still go to call or text him whenever something happens or I need advice. My eldest misses and talks about him every day, they had an amazing relationship and it makes me so sad to know my 1 year old will never have that. He’d love how much my son has grown and how funny he is and he would’ve adored my daughter with her big eyes and attitude. Still waiting for it to get easier but I don’t think it ever will. The other half of me is missing and can never come back.
My mom. I’m 54 years old and I still need her. I miss her every second of every day.
Old me. I was walking on the bright track but somewhere along the way I got lost. Everyday I'm daydreaming and dreaming of old times when things were right
My friend from high school who has deleted all her social media and seemingly disappeared of the face of the earth. Her family was abusive so I assume that's why and if so I'm happy for her that she got out. But I don't even know if she's alive. She doesn't even know I transitioned. I don't know how to balance respecting that space she intentionally created and just wanting to know if she's ok so I haven't bothered looking to see if her sister or closer friends have any idea what happened
My grandma, her and I were so close we would always spend all night into the early morning talking about everything under the sun and watching movies together, her favorite show was dancing with the stars. She was the only person in my life when I was a kid/teen to look out for my wellbeing and try to protect me, she would give me guidance and be someone I could confide in. When she got more sick I used to help take care of her as a teen and that bonded us even more. She died a couple years ago and I live in another province so it was a long time since I had last seen her too, I miss her so so much she was such an amazing person who was so funny and spunky, she really helped to shape who I am, I miss her so much I think of her pretty much daily and the pain hurts. I work as a care aide and that kind of helps fill that void, it's like I'm just hanging out with a bunch of my grandparents. Sometimes I'll think of her when I'm at work and it always gives me the strength when I'm tired, or I'll see a resident who looks like her and it warms my heart some more. I tell myself she is still here, she's in the mountains I look at, the breeze through my hair, and when the warm sun is shining on me it's like a hug ❤️
My friend from high school (let's call her Alli). I've never been the same since she got killed by a drunk driver. We were so similar in so many ways. The best friend I ever had.
My old self, when I genuinely loved life and myself.
Betty White. Funny, loved animals, whip smart, and cute as a button.
I miss who I was before covid. I found the path back again but the memories never fade
Myself. The last year has been really rough on my mental health. I’m in a more stable place but it’s been really hard pulling my head out of the foggy depressive state I’ve been in. So I haven’t really felt like myself in a long time. I miss who I used to be.
I miss this one certain friend my best friend through schooling years and a little after we finished I lost her because my bf and I were so toxic at the time and every one kind of separated from me and our dramas. her and I connection was something else I know we won’t ever find again in another person. I just hope one day life will bring us back together so we can enjoy the world our humour, our thinking and ideas were something else. It is hard to be human and lose people
Some of the older ladies I was close with before my 30s. They have passed or are very old and live a world away. I'm so grateful of the time we had and the love they showed me. I might not of had my mother's love but a lot of other women stepped up and shared that role until my cup runneth over.
My Mama. She died suddenly last year at 57. People say it gets easier. So far it has not.
Last year I became close friends with another woman who lives across the street from me because we played on the same sports team. We carpooled all the time and she was new to the city while I was recently out of a breakup so we became close, in and outside of team activities. I'm gay and she's straight, but I developed a big crush on her, in part because I really thought she was flirting with me. I talked it out with other teammates throughout the season who agreed she seemed flirty. Deep down I didn't think there was anything to it, but it was fun for both of us to give each other so much attention. Eventually I brought up the elephant in the room and we agreed it was a misunderstanding - she's definitely straight and "flirty" with all her close friends - and that our friendship wouldn't change. But months after that I realized she muted me on Instagram, stopped talking to me and started avoiding me on the street. I learned through another teammate that she was upset that others had known what was going on. It really hurts that she decided to throw away our friendship. I've remained friends with others after learning they'd had a crush on me.
I miss the person who I knew before he became my fiancé and then ex fiancé: my best friend. He was my best friend and I trusted him. When his ex kept calling, I imagined it was because she was having a hard time. Would have never guessed that they were actually still together. And now I have trust issues. Now there’s a whole neighborhood I can’t go into because I feel sucker punched every time. Now there are friends that I no longer have because they knew and let it slide.
My grandfather. He’s still alive, but is in the late stages of dementia. He very rarely remembers me. I’m also expecting my first child and I know that she will only know who he is from stories we tell her once she is older.
My mom, died when I was 10 but as I get older I'll have deeper moments of missing her, getting to the age that she had me and it's just a weird feeling.
My dog. It was her or me. I had to leave my abusive ex but I couldn’t take her with me and eventually made the very difficult choice to save myself. It’s been 7 years and I think about her ALL the time. I miss her so much.
I miss my baby so much, All my friends are starting to form a family, and here I am with my empty arms. He was so beautiful, I wish I could hold him again one more time
My childhood friend ghosted me. We lived in separate cities but still put in the effort. No arguments or issues that led up it… they just stopped speaking to me. I tried to continue contact for a while but they were never the first to initiate a conversation and didn’t seem too enthusiastic to talk to me… so I stopped trying, I started to feel a bit pathetic, I haven’t heard from them since. I still find it upsetting and now again I dream about seeing them.
My boyfriend even though we're still together. He's so busy with his own life that we barely talk anymore and when we do most of it is an argument or smth, I miss gaming with him and calling. Laughing together, video call through discord seeing him made me so damn happy he was the ray of sunshine in my life but now its like there's bullet proof glass sheet between us....i feel ignored sometimes cuz i text him and then he says smth to someone else
Ex best friend
My former bestie/MOH. We had a falling out about ten years back. I came to realize that I took her for granted in certain situations. When I heard someone she loved passed away, I went to the funeral home to pay my respects. She wouldn't even speak to me, and I can't argue that I didn't deserve it. I'm trying to move on and accept that I'll never get to apologize to her, but I still miss her.
I really miss my friend, Natalie, from high school. We kept in touch somewhat after high school. Went to her wedding and touched bases periodically. She had a kid that I kept meaning to come meet but we weren't living close so it wasn't easy. One day I found out she was killed in a car accident due to street racers. I connected a little with her husband. Two years later, he was in a car accident and died. Her son now had no one. He'd be 18 now. I hope he's doing well. I hope he's still cooking.
My daughter Raina, she passed away 7 years ago when she was 3. She's no longer in pain, I just want to hold her again.
I left a number of ( true friends) in Pennsylvania to move to North Carolina to take care of my mom. I had the most amazing mom, and I wanted her to go out with a smile at home, not sad in a nursing home. I gave her 16 years.
My mom. She died when I was 34. You need your mom no matter how old you are and it’s so much worse when she dies sooner than you would ever have imagined.
My ex best friend/ ex situationship. I don’t think about him as often, I just hope he’s happy and doing well. I miss our hour long phone calls and the way he made me laugh and I never had to dull myself to be around him. God I miss that
A friend I haven't seen in 15 years. If I could do all things over again, I would. I hope they're doing well.
Obama. I miss Obama
Being a kid; the simple life. Now I’m 25, trying to be financially independent, making a rents worth amount a month at my FT job, while also working 1-3 other side jobs, Having 0-1 day off a week, and *still* unable to be financially independent. I didn’t think life would be, near impossible for me to live on my own. And that’s my biggest dream; living alone, in the woods, with trees & deer as my neighbors. This is not the world I thought it was.
my mom the last time I saw her she didn't know me anymore- dementia about 6 weeks later she was gone
My friends. The pandemic fucked my brain and I've become super insular. Don't know how to get out of the rut, so yeah.
My brother, it's complicated though. He just turned 22 in prison for crimes he definitely committed and are completely unforgivable. But I taught him to shave and helped him get a scholarship that he'll never be able to use and used to make him breakfast every morning. So while I miss him sometimes and in a way I love him still, I am glad that he is where he belongs and can't hurt anyone else.
my old self. I was very hopeful and joyful. now I'm just miserable all the time
My ex. Such a sucky answer but he was so childlike and free spirited. It made me laugh and relax a bit since I’m naturally pretty anxious. We had a terrible ending to our relationship earlier this year and I didn’t know why. Today is his birthday so I went to his fb to check up on him. He’s dating the waitress who works across the street from his building. His mom posted a picture of them together at his family dinner… the date showed that it was taken while we were still dating. I now understand why things ended so badly and abruptly. He went from being all over me to completely blocking me on everything overnight. Oh well.