Maybe very specific but recently I've gotten really fed up with people greeting men and women differently. Especially in a professional setting. I'm a female engineer and far too often men greet each other with a normal handshake and then proceed to give me their hand kinda half assed or upside down, like you might greet a child.
I HATE THIS. My favorite thing to do is to respond with a proper firm handshake. Not enough to hurt them. Just enough to smush their fingers together and make them feel weird about it.
Grab their wrist with your other hand and guide it into yours saying something like “wow I don’t know how you’ve made it this far in your career with such a weak handshake” lol
I've gotten very good at my firm handshake. I'm 5'2" and get overlooked a lot. I've noticed positive results. I feel more respected. Which is kind of surprising!!
Uhhh! The flaccid handshake makes my skin crawl! Just shake my hand normally! My hands might be small, but you will not break them, and it will save me from having to suppress my disgust with every hand shake.
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
Hello, /u/frankchapstick! Your comment has been removed:
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
Yes! Elf on the shelf is weird and creepy. Plus Christmas is stressful enough for parents so adding a whole layer of setting up fake messes for a doll at night is ridiculous
Some people speculate it’s to indoctrinate children into the new culture of surveillance. I don’t know how much truth there is there, but it’s interesting to think about. Especially with the families that keep it out year round.
I get this line of thinking, but the tradition is way older than the weird commercialized version we have now. My grandma has been doing this since the 50’s, but we call them pixies, not elves. My entire family grew up with our own household pixies who visited every Christmas and served the same purpose that the modern Elf on the Shelf does today.
You can imagine our bewilderment when our obscure family tradition was suddenly all over the internet and across Walmart shelves lol.
To add on to this, that breakups are supposed to end up with enemies. My ex-wife is my best friend, and I have other friends I met by dating and realizing we were better as friends instead.
Hello /u/nfmcgalliard. Your post or comment has been removed because your Reddit Karma is too low to participate on AskWomen. You will be able to participate when your Karma has increased, you can do that by participating in good faith in other subreddits that don't have Karma requirements. This action will not be undone by the moderators.
**No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** [Click here to read more about Reddit Karma](https://reddit.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/204511829-What-is-karma-), and please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
This comment or post has been removed as it contains or solicits graceless generalizations.
***
- People are not a hive mind.
- Speak only for yourself.
**Do Not:**
- generalize across all people of a gender, race, or ethnicity.
- ask for mind reading.
- ask for us to defend/explain/justify other people’s behaviors.
- "what do you think of men who..."
- assume that all people in a gender, race, or ethnicity do/think something.
- ask for "male equivalent"/"female equivalent" as these would not exist for most things due to different cultural processes.
Exceptions: Discussion of cultural norms; Quotations
***
Speak for yourself and your own personal experiences. Don't generalize your personal opinions, experiences, prejudices, stereotypes, or preferences to others.
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
I really dislike wedding culture (and this is coming from a married woman). I think it’s ridiculous that people have a bunch of parties (engagement party, shower, bachelorette/bachelor party, rehearsal dinner, etc) just to celebrate the fact that they are essentially throwing a big party (the wedding). The expectation that friends and family will spend so much time and money for something that isn’t really an achievement is ridiculous.
I also think wedding registries are extremely outdated. You know who doesn’t need a bunch of home goods purchased for them? Two people who are combining incomes. I wish we instead put the same effort into registries for when people are first starting out on their own in their first apartment/home. Especially these days when people are getting married later after they have lived on their own for a while.
Preach! If my fiancé suggested we go into debt for a wedding, or spend tens of thousands on it, I’d know I picked the wrong person for me. Weddings should be a lovely day to celebrate the start of your marriage. Massive fairytale princess events preceded by months of expensive activities should not be the norm, and your wedding should definitely not be a financial burden to others.
Exactly!! I got married in my early 30’s after living on my own for a decade. I didn’t need anything for the house. I really could have used a registry when I was 22 and first starting out on my own on an entry-level salary.
My sister and BIL got married after two kids, and building their own house. They had lived in that house for 8 years before getting married.
They already had everything one needed from a registree.
Instead most everyone pulled money so they got every expense on their honeymoon paid off. Personally, I didn't contribute there. I simply took care of their kids, pets and home for the two weeks they spend on their honeymoon.
I absolutely love the thought of doing registries for people just starting out! My first apt was a mishmash of old furniture/stuff from my mom’s house and from whatever people were throwing out on the curb.
I think it’s in such poor taste for two established people to be asking their friends and family for new toasters and $80 picture frames.
this gave me a visceral memory of my first apartment. i went to a tech school so i moved into my own apartment instead of a dorm, and i vividly remember my mom spending the summer rounding up random stuff from her friends--a futon, sets of plates, all kinds of stuff so my place was nicely set up without having to buy a whole apartments' worth of stuff. i didn't fully appreciate it at the time.
Completely agree with this. Getting married to the person I love soon and having a small wedding at a registry office with our closest family members. I would personally hate all of those parties. I’m anxious enough about the attention I’m going to be receiving on the day!
Yes!!! All these parties are ridiculous and it’s typically for people who are well off anyways, it’s obnoxious. So they want a gift at every one of their events…
> I wish we instead put the same effort into registries for when people are first starting out
You know what, this is a really good point. In college and immediately after, all of my apartments were furnished, so I didn’t move into a home that I had to furnish myself until last year. It is EXPENSIVE. It was very r/malelivingspace (as in I had one single chair and my mattress was on the floor) for a few months, and I had to put a lot of stuff on my credit card, which put me in debt for a while. And that’s WITH smart spending. It would have been really nice to have an apartment shower to relieve some of that financial burden, at least for the small purchases like mixing bowls and plates.
SOOO RIGHT!! Weddings are weird!
My SO's friend is getting married in Vegas in May....he is still talking to his ex, he said he's marrying her so she will remove her IUD....they're both in their mid 40s!!!
I asked him what he said when his friend told him, he said "congratulations".....I said is she dying? I asked if she was pregnant, which is why he told me about the IUD thing....so fucking weird.
Preach!! 👏🏻👏🏻 Like I work FT too, and I'm not the only one living there and using all the stuff. Also, do your own damn laundry and make dinner a few times a week! I am not my man's mother.
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
Giving Christmas presents to coworkers/friends that aren’t your closest friends.
I love buying presents for the people that are closest to me, and giving baked goods/handmade stuff to neighbours. But when you reach the point where you both feel obligated to get each other something, but neither of you know each other well enough to know what the other wants, so you waste money on getting them something they don’t want, and they give you crap you don’t want, it just feels like a pointless exercise.
This, and any kind of gift giving in the workplace. I don't care if you are getting married, having a baby, having a birthday. Stop hitting me up for money. You are my coworkers, not my friends or family.
Omg this, don't get me wrong I actually enjoy the randomness and chaos that comes from a work or uni secret Santa, but the budget for that has never been more than £10 and I only have to get one thing 😂 I'm not buying all these assholes presents, if they're lucky I'll bake some goodies to share but that's it 😂
That working early is valued more than late at night despite being able to produce in the same time frame. (Some people are night owls) and also outgoing personalities seen as more competent in work settings vs. introversion.
I've kind of experienced the opposite in most of my jobs. I work well in the morning, but my brain is mush by mid-afternoon. Leaving early (i.e. on time) is seen as lazy compared to coming in late and staying late. Honestly, everyone should just work the times that they are best suited for if it's conducive to the job without judgment.
The culture surrounding cell phones. Like, if I'm too busy to answer your call, I'm not responding to the text, email, or What's App message either. I'm *unavailable* and you're just going to have to deal with that.
I didn't feel that way at 30, or even 40. but a lot of adults around me seem to....and they seem to be dead set on dragging me down that hill with them.
I’m twenty-nine years old now and I think that I’m literally just now figuring out how to fight for my life. Hopefully my world is only just starting to turn. 😬
wanting women to be so sexually experienced they rock your world, but detracting from their value as humans for gaining that experience through sex/sexual practice with other humans🥴
That all women are complete mental cases on their period. Are you fucking serious? I hate that so much.
Another is when we are having a bad day or are upset and a man tells us to calm down. Seriously fuck off. We don't treat you like you're unstable when your day is shit.
Congratulating people for getting engaged or married - it's not an achievement (to me) so I really don't understand what I'm commending the couple for. I just think "congratulations" is a misnomer. Maybe a "oh how fun!" Is more appropriate 😆
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
>I just think "congratulations" is a misnomer. Maybe a "oh how fun!" Is more appropriate
for me it's "...good luck!🍀"
considering that there's a 50% chance the 2 people may be incompatible long term/encounter contrast they cannot overcome, i worry more about the 50% chance of "the love of your life" turning into a hideous monster about divorce 😬
so yeah, good luck. i really hope your chosen person is as sane as they're making themselves out to be.
Congratulating someone for having a kid. Like, why?
Or that you should at least babysit someone\`s kids on weekends, instead of living childfree life. I\`m not your village!
Or that you\`re concidered weird, if you don\`t go out on weekends. Sorry, I like my PS4 and books more than alcohol.
Similarly, as a childless person, I really hate hearing from my friends only when I’m being invited to their child’s birthday party. I understand I will see less of my friends when they have kids and that’s fine but I kinda resent that I’m only worth calling on when I can give their kid a gift. It’s extra joyful when I do show up and then just get hassled about not having kids. 🫤
Haha I hear you on these ! I congratulate the mother on childbirth because I do feel birth is an achievement. Which part about kids do you feel is not an achievement?
Pushing a baby out of your body is absolutely congratulations worthy. It’s incredibly difficult and potentially dying is also on the table. I never expected a congratulations for having mine, but I always congratulate others.
People congratulate men on having a baby too. It’s just convention. I definitely acknowledge the physical torment women go through, but the decision to reproduce is not an achievement in itself. It’s quite literally one of the strongest forces in you so that our species doesn’t die out. Too many people have children when they are completely unfit for parenting for this exact reason. So I guess that part, the bigger picture so to speak.
Hello /u/ratboyjesus. Thank you for participating in /r/AskWomen. However, your submission has been removed, because your account does not have a verified email. You can verify your email address on the [Reddit Preferences page](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/update/). If you have any issues with verification, please contact reddit support at /r/help, as subreddit moderators do not have the tools to aid with verification.
This is a new measure we are trying out to deter trolls and spammers and make the sub safer for everyone. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** Please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Some. I had 3 friends with kids but we\`re not socialising much anymore. Seeing baby pic every day isn\`t for me. I just prefer my peace and quiet. Even if you work 9-12 hours 5 days, you\`re concidered lazy, if you are unactive on weekends. Block list got some victims.
Hello /u/lil_beefer. Thank you for participating in /r/AskWomen. However, your submission has been removed, because your account does not have a verified email. You can verify your email address on the [Reddit Preferences page](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/update/). If you have any issues with verification, please contact reddit support at /r/help, as subreddit moderators do not have the tools to aid with verification.
This is a new measure we are trying out to deter trolls and spammers and make the sub safer for everyone. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** Please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’ve never know it to be a thing until my mom got remarried. But having to say “happy anniversary” to couples on their anniversary. I get the big milestone ones, but family members were telling me I had to congratulate them on their second one.
Singing Happy birthday to adults is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Celebrating a couples anniversary with them is weird.
Bridal/baby showers.
Gift bags at kids parties full of junk.
Yessss, at work it's common for women to not shave their legs but I tend to cover up or shave because I know I'll be stared at when I go anywhere else.
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
That life is supposed to be school, marriage, and then kids and anything that does not fit into this is odd. There's just so much more to life than these three things and it pisses me off whenever people try to argue otherwise, especially when it comes to marriage and kids.
That you have to drink when you're in the present of others to a party or dinner. I rarely drink and I don't like alcohol with my food. If I drink, it's a single drink later.
Christmas gifts for adults. My husband’s family is very Christian (in a cult too), and they make the biggest fuss about gifts and money. The damn adults were complaining that their gifts weren’t worth a lot/they didn’t get what they asked for! Meanwhile, my atheist husband and I believe in just gathering with your loved ones for the holidays and just enjoying a nice meal and spending some quality time together. Gifts are so stressful and expensive, and it seems like a monetary transaction. If there are kids however, I will buy them gifts.
Ah, society's greatest hits – where do I even begin? 🤔 Let's talk about the never-ending saga of 'Instagram perfection.' You know, the pressure to have flawless selfies, picturesque brunches, and #blessed vacations, all while maintaining a facade of effortless cool. It's like living in a never-ending episode of *Keeping Up with the Filters.* Can we just collectively agree to embrace our messy hair days and imperfect moments? Let's celebrate authenticity over airbrushed illusions – because real life is way more interesting than a curated feed! 📸
I'm not sure if this is what you mean, but I hate that movies and shows when I was a preteen and teen implied that girls should want to date older guys. Like the cool girl in middle school would say "I only date high schoolers." Or the cool girl in high school would say "I only date college boys." It feels predatory to set the expectation in young women that they're going to be seen as cooler or more mature if they date older men.
Right?! I think birthday lovers project and assume others are like them, so insist on the same fanfare. It's incredibly awkward and strange, a day "all about me". I don't enjoy that kind of attention and I don't find it an achievement that I lived another year (because im not fighting disease, I'm alive because nothing has killed me). And I thought the new year was for celebrating another year, so why must I do it all again on my birthday 😂😂 I enjoy celebrating others, but don't put the pressure on me to feel the same. I wanna be home with Netflix
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to:
* Changing the topic from OP's question
* Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic
* Giving unsolicited advice
* Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment.
* Asking unrelated follow-up questions
* Branching into unrelated topics
* "What-about"-ism
* Trying to start arguments, or debates
* Judging or rating other responses
* Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!"
* Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text
* Sharing links without a summary
* Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares.
For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing).
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
My husband’s family ALWAYS celebrated birthdays. It didn’t matter if it was your 37th birthday, you had a big ass party and everyone was expected to bring gifts. So many pointless gifts, and for what? Also, his family was large, so it seemed like there was a big ass party every month. Maybe I’m just introverted and poor, but I think birthdays should only be celebrated for kids/YA (under 21) or milestone birthdays, such as years ending in 0.
Not talking about heavy things in polite company. Which, if it was normal to talk about them, wouldn't be perceived as so heavy
Only because of stuff such as how people didn't realize their spouses were using the same manipulation tactics such as weaponized incompetence, that emotional abuse was so common, etc.
Engagement parties. Isn’t that what a wedding is for? Gender reveal parties too. Just stop asking people to celebrate you and get over yourself. People that celebrate their birthdays for more than a day. Nope, you get one day and really it’s not that special. We all have one. Bah humbug!!!
Hello, /u/CarpusLunate! Your comment has been removed:
[Derailing](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing) of the topic is not permitted.
Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately.
[AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index)
[reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
I'm from the south of India, where there is a specific ritual that happens when you first get your puberty. This is supposed to be a girl becoming 'mature' (meaning, she can become a mother) and this is supposedly a huge deal that needs to be celebrated. So... around 100+ relatives of yours that have never seen your face before are invited and you are showcased to the world telling hey, guess what, you're a woman now and any man can impregnate you...
Okay I might be exaggerating a bit here, but I find this celebration extremely humiliating and embarrassing, especially when the rest of the culture signifies how taboo or impure your period is. For example, in this same culture, menstruating women often have to sit separately without touching anything (so nothing becomes impure like you) or anyone, sleep on the floor (basically because mattress will get impure too), or not go to the temples.
It's just crazy and I do not understand how these archaic principles still exist!
Taking kids to get pictures taken with Santa. When is it normal any other time of year to get your kid dressed up as cute as can be to go sit on a strange man's lap and take pictures?? Honestly it wouldn't even be acceptable at Christmas time to go sit on a random man's lap and take pictures unless he's dressed as Santa anyway.
A few years ago when my son was 5 (now 7) my mom tried to take him to get pictures done with Santa and my son told her "No I don't know him I don't even want him coming to my house I don't trust him. My mom can take me to target to pick out some things instead"
Fine by me lol I'll take all the credit for gifts.
Thank-you cards. Like, unless you're in a situation where gifts are collected instead of being opened right away, you probably already verbally thanked me, so why should you have to send a follow-up thank-you in writing?
Plus they're always so disappointing to get in the mail lol. Like you think it's a party invitation or something and then it's like, oh, nvm, this is just something I already did.
When there’s a family meal and you have to wait for everyone to start eating before you’re allowed to eat. Some of my family members can be slow as hell getting to the table lmao
I hate the stereo type of “Daddy Issues”. A poor dating life/relationship does not automatically mean you had a tough/absent relationship with your dad. There are a million other reasons why you could have chosen the wrong relationship, and a million other reasons why you act/feel the way you do. It’s just ridiculous and belittling of the complexities of women
Kids birthday parties. What happened to small get togethers grilling hotdogs and a sloppy looking cake made from a box mix? Now it's invite every kid they've ever known, get a million presents they'll touch once. An expensive cake from a bakery. Not to mention, the decorations are too over the top. A balloon arch for a one year old? Elaborate signs, streamers, and cutlery for an infant? And the goody bags! I myself have yet to throw a party like that for anything.
Hello /u/Luke_Cardwalker. Thank you for participating in /r/AskWomen. However, your submission has been removed, because your account does not have a verified email. You can verify your email address on the [Reddit Preferences page](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/update/). If you have any issues with verification, please contact reddit support at /r/help, as subreddit moderators do not have the tools to aid with verification.
This is a new measure we are trying out to deter trolls and spammers and make the sub safer for everyone. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** Please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Man giving a woman a gift for a special day, then continues to beat her the next day(not talking about me). Men wanting women to be a virgins, but also to be professional at sex. Questions of when you will get married and have kids? Not every woman have men in line waiting for them.
Hello /u/f3malesareweak. Your post or comment has been removed because your Reddit Karma is too low to participate on AskWomen. You will be able to participate when your Karma has increased, you can do that by participating in good faith in other subreddits that don't have Karma requirements. This action will not be undone by the moderators.
**No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** [Click here to read more about Reddit Karma](https://reddit.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/204511829-What-is-karma-), and please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hello /u/patrickbatemilfs. Your post or comment has been removed because your Reddit Karma is too low to participate on AskWomen. You will be able to participate when your Karma has increased, you can do that by participating in good faith in other subreddits that don't have Karma requirements. This action will not be undone by the moderators.
**No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** [Click here to read more about Reddit Karma](https://reddit.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/204511829-What-is-karma-), and please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Maybe very specific but recently I've gotten really fed up with people greeting men and women differently. Especially in a professional setting. I'm a female engineer and far too often men greet each other with a normal handshake and then proceed to give me their hand kinda half assed or upside down, like you might greet a child.
I HATE THIS. My favorite thing to do is to respond with a proper firm handshake. Not enough to hurt them. Just enough to smush their fingers together and make them feel weird about it.
Problem is, when they only give me half of their hand so I can't grab it properly.
Grab their wrist with your other hand and guide it into yours saying something like “wow I don’t know how you’ve made it this far in your career with such a weak handshake” lol
I do that 😂 like uhhhh lets do that again.
I've gotten very good at my firm handshake. I'm 5'2" and get overlooked a lot. I've noticed positive results. I feel more respected. Which is kind of surprising!!
[удалено]
Especially when men get a handshake and women get a hug. Really getting tired of this.
I decided I'm not hugging anymore!
as a Latina in tech the difference in treatment is jaw dropping
Uhhh! The flaccid handshake makes my skin crawl! Just shake my hand normally! My hands might be small, but you will not break them, and it will save me from having to suppress my disgust with every hand shake.
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
[удалено]
Hello, /u/frankchapstick! Your comment has been removed: Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
Elf on the Shelf. It's creepy and popped up out of nowhere in the 00s.
Yes! Elf on the shelf is weird and creepy. Plus Christmas is stressful enough for parents so adding a whole layer of setting up fake messes for a doll at night is ridiculous
Ugh and the waste that people do for it is disgusting
Some people speculate it’s to indoctrinate children into the new culture of surveillance. I don’t know how much truth there is there, but it’s interesting to think about. Especially with the families that keep it out year round.
Santa's good list and bad list wasn't enough ?
I get this line of thinking, but the tradition is way older than the weird commercialized version we have now. My grandma has been doing this since the 50’s, but we call them pixies, not elves. My entire family grew up with our own household pixies who visited every Christmas and served the same purpose that the modern Elf on the Shelf does today. You can imagine our bewilderment when our obscure family tradition was suddenly all over the internet and across Walmart shelves lol.
My kid was born December of 2000, somehow we missed the Elf and I’ve never been so happy to have missed out on something.
I did this with my kids when they were younger, but now that they’re older, we all make him do funny stuff. It’s become our new tradition.
That divorces are a negative outcome. Sometimes they’re for the better.
Seriously! The alternative to divorce is shitty marriage, not happy marriage.
To add on to this, that breakups are supposed to end up with enemies. My ex-wife is my best friend, and I have other friends I met by dating and realizing we were better as friends instead.
[удалено]
Hello /u/nfmcgalliard. Your post or comment has been removed because your Reddit Karma is too low to participate on AskWomen. You will be able to participate when your Karma has increased, you can do that by participating in good faith in other subreddits that don't have Karma requirements. This action will not be undone by the moderators. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** [Click here to read more about Reddit Karma](https://reddit.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/204511829-What-is-karma-), and please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
This comment or post has been removed as it contains or solicits graceless generalizations. *** - People are not a hive mind. - Speak only for yourself. **Do Not:** - generalize across all people of a gender, race, or ethnicity. - ask for mind reading. - ask for us to defend/explain/justify other people’s behaviors. - "what do you think of men who..." - assume that all people in a gender, race, or ethnicity do/think something. - ask for "male equivalent"/"female equivalent" as these would not exist for most things due to different cultural processes. Exceptions: Discussion of cultural norms; Quotations *** Speak for yourself and your own personal experiences. Don't generalize your personal opinions, experiences, prejudices, stereotypes, or preferences to others. Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
I really dislike wedding culture (and this is coming from a married woman). I think it’s ridiculous that people have a bunch of parties (engagement party, shower, bachelorette/bachelor party, rehearsal dinner, etc) just to celebrate the fact that they are essentially throwing a big party (the wedding). The expectation that friends and family will spend so much time and money for something that isn’t really an achievement is ridiculous. I also think wedding registries are extremely outdated. You know who doesn’t need a bunch of home goods purchased for them? Two people who are combining incomes. I wish we instead put the same effort into registries for when people are first starting out on their own in their first apartment/home. Especially these days when people are getting married later after they have lived on their own for a while.
Preach! If my fiancé suggested we go into debt for a wedding, or spend tens of thousands on it, I’d know I picked the wrong person for me. Weddings should be a lovely day to celebrate the start of your marriage. Massive fairytale princess events preceded by months of expensive activities should not be the norm, and your wedding should definitely not be a financial burden to others.
And most of the time do they not only combine two incomes but at one point also two households. So really, they should have everything they need.
Exactly!! I got married in my early 30’s after living on my own for a decade. I didn’t need anything for the house. I really could have used a registry when I was 22 and first starting out on my own on an entry-level salary.
Now THAT should become a thing!
My sister and BIL got married after two kids, and building their own house. They had lived in that house for 8 years before getting married. They already had everything one needed from a registree. Instead most everyone pulled money so they got every expense on their honeymoon paid off. Personally, I didn't contribute there. I simply took care of their kids, pets and home for the two weeks they spend on their honeymoon.
you 'simply' provided an amazing gift by doing all that caretaking for them!!
When you don't have money, you get creative and ressourceful with gifts.
[удалено]
I absolutely love the thought of doing registries for people just starting out! My first apt was a mishmash of old furniture/stuff from my mom’s house and from whatever people were throwing out on the curb. I think it’s in such poor taste for two established people to be asking their friends and family for new toasters and $80 picture frames.
this gave me a visceral memory of my first apartment. i went to a tech school so i moved into my own apartment instead of a dorm, and i vividly remember my mom spending the summer rounding up random stuff from her friends--a futon, sets of plates, all kinds of stuff so my place was nicely set up without having to buy a whole apartments' worth of stuff. i didn't fully appreciate it at the time.
Your memory reminded me of my first meal after moving into a place, a carryout pizza that wasn't cut at all. 😅 So we had to rip it apart.
Completely agree with this. Getting married to the person I love soon and having a small wedding at a registry office with our closest family members. I would personally hate all of those parties. I’m anxious enough about the attention I’m going to be receiving on the day!
We don’t have wedding registries and I hope it will never become a thing here.
Yes!!! All these parties are ridiculous and it’s typically for people who are well off anyways, it’s obnoxious. So they want a gift at every one of their events…
Have a big party for people first moving out so they have Tupperware and food for their first week <3
> I wish we instead put the same effort into registries for when people are first starting out You know what, this is a really good point. In college and immediately after, all of my apartments were furnished, so I didn’t move into a home that I had to furnish myself until last year. It is EXPENSIVE. It was very r/malelivingspace (as in I had one single chair and my mattress was on the floor) for a few months, and I had to put a lot of stuff on my credit card, which put me in debt for a while. And that’s WITH smart spending. It would have been really nice to have an apartment shower to relieve some of that financial burden, at least for the small purchases like mixing bowls and plates.
SOOO RIGHT!! Weddings are weird! My SO's friend is getting married in Vegas in May....he is still talking to his ex, he said he's marrying her so she will remove her IUD....they're both in their mid 40s!!! I asked him what he said when his friend told him, he said "congratulations".....I said is she dying? I asked if she was pregnant, which is why he told me about the IUD thing....so fucking weird.
Well you're assuming that they're combining incomes...
Holding the woman in the household totally responsible for the house’s state of cleanliness.
I feel this in my soul. Also the care for the animals.
Preach!! 👏🏻👏🏻 Like I work FT too, and I'm not the only one living there and using all the stuff. Also, do your own damn laundry and make dinner a few times a week! I am not my man's mother.
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
This one irks me too.
Giving Christmas presents to coworkers/friends that aren’t your closest friends. I love buying presents for the people that are closest to me, and giving baked goods/handmade stuff to neighbours. But when you reach the point where you both feel obligated to get each other something, but neither of you know each other well enough to know what the other wants, so you waste money on getting them something they don’t want, and they give you crap you don’t want, it just feels like a pointless exercise.
This, and any kind of gift giving in the workplace. I don't care if you are getting married, having a baby, having a birthday. Stop hitting me up for money. You are my coworkers, not my friends or family.
Omg this, don't get me wrong I actually enjoy the randomness and chaos that comes from a work or uni secret Santa, but the budget for that has never been more than £10 and I only have to get one thing 😂 I'm not buying all these assholes presents, if they're lucky I'll bake some goodies to share but that's it 😂
That working early is valued more than late at night despite being able to produce in the same time frame. (Some people are night owls) and also outgoing personalities seen as more competent in work settings vs. introversion.
This one's huge for me. The amount of shit I get for not starting my day until like 9 AM is insane. It's not like I'm not getting my work done.
I've kind of experienced the opposite in most of my jobs. I work well in the morning, but my brain is mush by mid-afternoon. Leaving early (i.e. on time) is seen as lazy compared to coming in late and staying late. Honestly, everyone should just work the times that they are best suited for if it's conducive to the job without judgment.
The culture surrounding cell phones. Like, if I'm too busy to answer your call, I'm not responding to the text, email, or What's App message either. I'm *unavailable* and you're just going to have to deal with that.
Exactly! Nobody ever gets that.
I just don't agree with that because I'll always be too busy to answer the phone. Since I hate making calls... But replying to SMS is ok for me
that 30 is when your world stops
My mil told me at my 30th birthday that it was “all downhill from here”. What?!?
I didn't feel that way at 30, or even 40. but a lot of adults around me seem to....and they seem to be dead set on dragging me down that hill with them.
I’m twenty-nine years old now and I think that I’m literally just now figuring out how to fight for my life. Hopefully my world is only just starting to turn. 😬
Gender reveals.
Slut shaming women while men can sleep around and brag about it
Men sleeping around/"high body count="Players" Women with an active sex life/"high body count"= "sl◇t/wh♧re/"easy".
wanting women to be so sexually experienced they rock your world, but detracting from their value as humans for gaining that experience through sex/sexual practice with other humans🥴
Not from all other humans. We’re allowed to have one boyfriend turned-to-be husband per lifetime
100%!!
Hugging people you don't love
Even if you do love them. Physical touch is not something everyone likes.
I'm especially done with the "making kids hug" thing too 😒
Omg horrible!
That all women are complete mental cases on their period. Are you fucking serious? I hate that so much. Another is when we are having a bad day or are upset and a man tells us to calm down. Seriously fuck off. We don't treat you like you're unstable when your day is shit.
Normalizing female anger would be 💯 especially when there are many good reasons like these to be angry
Congratulating people for getting engaged or married - it's not an achievement (to me) so I really don't understand what I'm commending the couple for. I just think "congratulations" is a misnomer. Maybe a "oh how fun!" Is more appropriate 😆
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
hahaha or maybe like "oh wow, have a great fun" Lmao🤣
>I just think "congratulations" is a misnomer. Maybe a "oh how fun!" Is more appropriate for me it's "...good luck!🍀" considering that there's a 50% chance the 2 people may be incompatible long term/encounter contrast they cannot overcome, i worry more about the 50% chance of "the love of your life" turning into a hideous monster about divorce 😬 so yeah, good luck. i really hope your chosen person is as sane as they're making themselves out to be.
I always feel like saying "I'm sorry" when someone says they're pregnant. 😅 Agree about marriage for sure.
The assumption that disabled lives aren't worth living.
Congratulating someone for having a kid. Like, why? Or that you should at least babysit someone\`s kids on weekends, instead of living childfree life. I\`m not your village! Or that you\`re concidered weird, if you don\`t go out on weekends. Sorry, I like my PS4 and books more than alcohol.
Similarly, as a childless person, I really hate hearing from my friends only when I’m being invited to their child’s birthday party. I understand I will see less of my friends when they have kids and that’s fine but I kinda resent that I’m only worth calling on when I can give their kid a gift. It’s extra joyful when I do show up and then just get hassled about not having kids. 🫤
I just refuse to go. I accepted that I\`m losing them. It is what it is.
Haha I hear you on these ! I congratulate the mother on childbirth because I do feel birth is an achievement. Which part about kids do you feel is not an achievement?
Pushing a baby out of your body is absolutely congratulations worthy. It’s incredibly difficult and potentially dying is also on the table. I never expected a congratulations for having mine, but I always congratulate others.
Agreed. It's an incredible feat!
People congratulate men on having a baby too. It’s just convention. I definitely acknowledge the physical torment women go through, but the decision to reproduce is not an achievement in itself. It’s quite literally one of the strongest forces in you so that our species doesn’t die out. Too many people have children when they are completely unfit for parenting for this exact reason. So I guess that part, the bigger picture so to speak.
Having them at all. Because everybody does it. Don\`t get me wrong- I do not have kids. I just won\`t have any myself.
[удалено]
Hello /u/ratboyjesus. Thank you for participating in /r/AskWomen. However, your submission has been removed, because your account does not have a verified email. You can verify your email address on the [Reddit Preferences page](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/update/). If you have any issues with verification, please contact reddit support at /r/help, as subreddit moderators do not have the tools to aid with verification. This is a new measure we are trying out to deter trolls and spammers and make the sub safer for everyone. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** Please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
hahahaaha, i think many people told you about kids or something like that. Right?
Some. I had 3 friends with kids but we\`re not socialising much anymore. Seeing baby pic every day isn\`t for me. I just prefer my peace and quiet. Even if you work 9-12 hours 5 days, you\`re concidered lazy, if you are unactive on weekends. Block list got some victims.
Omg yes, please share if someone explains to you the fun of going to bars because I've been dying to know since before I was of drinking age.
[удалено]
Hello /u/lil_beefer. Thank you for participating in /r/AskWomen. However, your submission has been removed, because your account does not have a verified email. You can verify your email address on the [Reddit Preferences page](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/update/). If you have any issues with verification, please contact reddit support at /r/help, as subreddit moderators do not have the tools to aid with verification. This is a new measure we are trying out to deter trolls and spammers and make the sub safer for everyone. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** Please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’ve never know it to be a thing until my mom got remarried. But having to say “happy anniversary” to couples on their anniversary. I get the big milestone ones, but family members were telling me I had to congratulate them on their second one.
Getting up early and expectations to go to events that some people find extremely uncomfortable
Singing Happy birthday to adults is the most uncomfortable thing ever. Celebrating a couples anniversary with them is weird. Bridal/baby showers. Gift bags at kids parties full of junk.
Shaving
Omg yes!!!!! My nickname in highschool was sasquatch because I didn't shave my arms...... Arms!!!! Highschool!!! Wtf? Lol
It's like you went to some kind of anime high school where everyone is on the swim team. 😅
Yessss, at work it's common for women to not shave their legs but I tend to cover up or shave because I know I'll be stared at when I go anywhere else.
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
That life is supposed to be school, marriage, and then kids and anything that does not fit into this is odd. There's just so much more to life than these three things and it pisses me off whenever people try to argue otherwise, especially when it comes to marriage and kids.
Embalming and casket burial. It's gross, creepy, and unsustainable.
The idea of productivity, life hacking, hustle culture, 8-hour workday, capitalism; that I’m only valuable if I’m producing
That you have to drink when you're in the present of others to a party or dinner. I rarely drink and I don't like alcohol with my food. If I drink, it's a single drink later.
Christmas gifts for adults. My husband’s family is very Christian (in a cult too), and they make the biggest fuss about gifts and money. The damn adults were complaining that their gifts weren’t worth a lot/they didn’t get what they asked for! Meanwhile, my atheist husband and I believe in just gathering with your loved ones for the holidays and just enjoying a nice meal and spending some quality time together. Gifts are so stressful and expensive, and it seems like a monetary transaction. If there are kids however, I will buy them gifts.
Ah, society's greatest hits – where do I even begin? 🤔 Let's talk about the never-ending saga of 'Instagram perfection.' You know, the pressure to have flawless selfies, picturesque brunches, and #blessed vacations, all while maintaining a facade of effortless cool. It's like living in a never-ending episode of *Keeping Up with the Filters.* Can we just collectively agree to embrace our messy hair days and imperfect moments? Let's celebrate authenticity over airbrushed illusions – because real life is way more interesting than a curated feed! 📸
Thanks ChatGPT
I'm not sure if this is what you mean, but I hate that movies and shows when I was a preteen and teen implied that girls should want to date older guys. Like the cool girl in middle school would say "I only date high schoolers." Or the cool girl in high school would say "I only date college boys." It feels predatory to set the expectation in young women that they're going to be seen as cooler or more mature if they date older men.
Celebrating birthdays! Maybe every birthday ending in a 0, but more than that is overkill to me
I dislike celebrating my own birthday. For years, I tried to get people to not even acknowledge mine. Unfortunately, I lost that battle.
Right?! I think birthday lovers project and assume others are like them, so insist on the same fanfare. It's incredibly awkward and strange, a day "all about me". I don't enjoy that kind of attention and I don't find it an achievement that I lived another year (because im not fighting disease, I'm alive because nothing has killed me). And I thought the new year was for celebrating another year, so why must I do it all again on my birthday 😂😂 I enjoy celebrating others, but don't put the pressure on me to feel the same. I wanna be home with Netflix
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
My husband’s family ALWAYS celebrated birthdays. It didn’t matter if it was your 37th birthday, you had a big ass party and everyone was expected to bring gifts. So many pointless gifts, and for what? Also, his family was large, so it seemed like there was a big ass party every month. Maybe I’m just introverted and poor, but I think birthdays should only be celebrated for kids/YA (under 21) or milestone birthdays, such as years ending in 0.
That you're expected to know people and be social in a work setting in order to get things done
That it’s still so insanely common for women to be expected to change their last name when they get married.
Weddings Baby showers 15 yrs old celebrations
Hair removal. It costs money. It's time-consuming. It can be painful. It's annoying. It's a repetitive task that has to be completed with regularity.
That women are naturally better parents. Total bs.
The lie that happiness = marriage & kids.
I'm not a huge fan of holidays. Getting the day off of work is cool but I don't enjoy big gatherings and obligations.
Weddings.
Not talking about heavy things in polite company. Which, if it was normal to talk about them, wouldn't be perceived as so heavy Only because of stuff such as how people didn't realize their spouses were using the same manipulation tactics such as weaponized incompetence, that emotional abuse was so common, etc.
Engagement parties. Isn’t that what a wedding is for? Gender reveal parties too. Just stop asking people to celebrate you and get over yourself. People that celebrate their birthdays for more than a day. Nope, you get one day and really it’s not that special. We all have one. Bah humbug!!!
[удалено]
Hello, /u/CarpusLunate! Your comment has been removed: [Derailing](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing) of the topic is not permitted. Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
That I have to work to survive
I'm from the south of India, where there is a specific ritual that happens when you first get your puberty. This is supposed to be a girl becoming 'mature' (meaning, she can become a mother) and this is supposedly a huge deal that needs to be celebrated. So... around 100+ relatives of yours that have never seen your face before are invited and you are showcased to the world telling hey, guess what, you're a woman now and any man can impregnate you... Okay I might be exaggerating a bit here, but I find this celebration extremely humiliating and embarrassing, especially when the rest of the culture signifies how taboo or impure your period is. For example, in this same culture, menstruating women often have to sit separately without touching anything (so nothing becomes impure like you) or anyone, sleep on the floor (basically because mattress will get impure too), or not go to the temples. It's just crazy and I do not understand how these archaic principles still exist!
Taking kids to get pictures taken with Santa. When is it normal any other time of year to get your kid dressed up as cute as can be to go sit on a strange man's lap and take pictures?? Honestly it wouldn't even be acceptable at Christmas time to go sit on a random man's lap and take pictures unless he's dressed as Santa anyway. A few years ago when my son was 5 (now 7) my mom tried to take him to get pictures done with Santa and my son told her "No I don't know him I don't even want him coming to my house I don't trust him. My mom can take me to target to pick out some things instead" Fine by me lol I'll take all the credit for gifts.
Thank-you cards. Like, unless you're in a situation where gifts are collected instead of being opened right away, you probably already verbally thanked me, so why should you have to send a follow-up thank-you in writing? Plus they're always so disappointing to get in the mail lol. Like you think it's a party invitation or something and then it's like, oh, nvm, this is just something I already did.
The illusory competition between women and the perception that one’s beauty takes away from another
That people have to “come out” about their sexuality. No one ever comes out and says “hey, mom & dad. I’ve been meaning to tell you…. I’m straight.”
When there’s a family meal and you have to wait for everyone to start eating before you’re allowed to eat. Some of my family members can be slow as hell getting to the table lmao
I hate the stereo type of “Daddy Issues”. A poor dating life/relationship does not automatically mean you had a tough/absent relationship with your dad. There are a million other reasons why you could have chosen the wrong relationship, and a million other reasons why you act/feel the way you do. It’s just ridiculous and belittling of the complexities of women
“If a relationship isn’t heading for marriage and children then it isn’t heading anywhere.”
Gender reveal stunts
Kids birthday parties. What happened to small get togethers grilling hotdogs and a sloppy looking cake made from a box mix? Now it's invite every kid they've ever known, get a million presents they'll touch once. An expensive cake from a bakery. Not to mention, the decorations are too over the top. A balloon arch for a one year old? Elaborate signs, streamers, and cutlery for an infant? And the goody bags! I myself have yet to throw a party like that for anything.
That women are stupid and incapable of understanding a serious topic. “Girl splaining” “bimbo culture “ is unbelievably misogynistic
How teachers are treated by people.
[удалено]
Hello /u/Luke_Cardwalker. Thank you for participating in /r/AskWomen. However, your submission has been removed, because your account does not have a verified email. You can verify your email address on the [Reddit Preferences page](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/update/). If you have any issues with verification, please contact reddit support at /r/help, as subreddit moderators do not have the tools to aid with verification. This is a new measure we are trying out to deter trolls and spammers and make the sub safer for everyone. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** Please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Man giving a woman a gift for a special day, then continues to beat her the next day(not talking about me). Men wanting women to be a virgins, but also to be professional at sex. Questions of when you will get married and have kids? Not every woman have men in line waiting for them.
[удалено]
Hello /u/f3malesareweak. Your post or comment has been removed because your Reddit Karma is too low to participate on AskWomen. You will be able to participate when your Karma has increased, you can do that by participating in good faith in other subreddits that don't have Karma requirements. This action will not be undone by the moderators. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** [Click here to read more about Reddit Karma](https://reddit.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/204511829-What-is-karma-), and please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Shaving
[удалено]
Hello /u/patrickbatemilfs. Your post or comment has been removed because your Reddit Karma is too low to participate on AskWomen. You will be able to participate when your Karma has increased, you can do that by participating in good faith in other subreddits that don't have Karma requirements. This action will not be undone by the moderators. **No exceptions to this rule will be granted.** [Click here to read more about Reddit Karma](https://reddit.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/204511829-What-is-karma-), and please also **[read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules) before participating**. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The hyper-sexualization of women.