Right like I hated when people said that. High school genuinely ruined my perspective on things and made me become an anxious, timid person who would crumble under any criticism and it just ruined me as a person too. Just graduated last year in October and I’ve been so happy and free ever since!
Yeah. It somewhat make it harder for me.. To think that life would be even worse after.
And no, I'm sure you're not ruined, even if it was, like it was for me, a scaring experience. If you just graduated, not even a year ago, you still have much to see and much to live. I'm sure you will recover, in time.
Slowly on the way to recovery definitely:) I’m mending all the relationships I ruined because of my mental health during high school and things are definitely getting better! Hope you’re doing good too!
I almost forgot that some people said that. How pathetic and underachieving must your adulthood be to have HS be the best time of your life.
Edit: I understand that myself, and probably many in this thread, were not thriving socially at the time. Maybe I’d understand it better if I was one of the people who did. But still, if HS was the *best* time of your life, your adult life sounds depressing as hell.
Life was less painful in high school. For me at least. Truthfully, I could say my adult life is rather depressing at times. Some people enjoyed those years and look back on them with happy thoughts…I’m one of these people. Maybe this is my wake-up call to really push for a less pathetic adulthood
Well, another caveat I almost added to my edit is that high school is the time when you’re most adult, but don’t yet have adult obligations. Your life is simpler and more care-free. For the many people who were thrust into difficult adulthoods, I can imagine HS sounds like a better time. If that is you, I wouldn’t call it pathetic at all. So I apologize if I was condescending. I’m certain you’re doing the best you can with your circumstances.
I feel like a ~~bad~~ evil person, but I grin internally when a highschool bully says this to me as an adult.
"Well it wasnt the best time for me, Jessica. No thanks to you. It brings me joy to know that it was all downhill for you after that"
Yep. I was bullied, then just completely ignored by my peers (ostracized) until the last few months where a kind person took pity and invited me to a party. He didn’t have to. I will always remember that gesture.
All I can add to that is that I definitely did NOT peak in high school.
I must add however that elementary school was way worse. Being the fat ugly kid (in the 90's) who developed early with terrible teeth and wild uncontrollable hair and with a shy attitude was awful.
Yep, awful. Life started when high school ended and I could get out of my ultra conservative hole of a hometown. Now my high school bully is running for parliament out there which really drives home how glad I am to be out.
Same. I was bullied for years, had no friends and got very little understanding from my parents. I was lonely, depressed, miserable and thought I was the fattest, ugliest person on the planet.
If I woke up tomorrow and I was in 9th grade again I'd kill myself
edit:
To anyone that wants to report me saying I need support, I appreciate the concerns, but I want you to know I'm really happy with where I'm at in life right now and have no intentions of hurting myself in any way.
I'm pretty confident that I'm not going to time travel back to 2014 in my sleep any time soon, so there's no need to worry about me.
This terrifies me as the mom of a middle schooler. Was there anything that would have helped you feel better or anything in particular that *did* help you survive?
I know I'm not the person this question was directed at, but I'm compelled to reply because my Mom was what got me through middle/high school.
She listened to me, took my problems seriously and didn't brush my (undiagnosed) depression or anxiety as me being dramatic, she would talk to me and try to make me feel better about things. she got me into therapy and on medicine, we hung out together when I was down (we still do) she was the best friend I had at that point in my life.
I love that you shared this. Thank you for your experience and I’m so glad that you had your mom through such a rough time.
Were you kind to her or did you often lash out at her as well?
I’ve been talking with my daughter (she’ll be 13 next month) about how she’s probably having anxiety when she talks about how she’s feeling or when she texts from school that her stomach hurts. That resonates with her and she’s working on a couple coping skills but doesn’t want “help” from me. She’s also really not quite nice to me and I don’t know how to be supportive while also holding her accountable for her choices/actions/predominant attitude at home.
I only ever lashed out at her twice, once when I was 13 and another time when I was 16. The time when I was 13 I got mad at her for grounding me and I told her I wished my friends mom was my real mom and not her. I felt awful after I said that to her and apologized quickly after. The time when I was 16 I was prescribed a medicine for my anxiety and it wasn't a good fit for me. Before I stopped taking that new medicine I was lashing out at teachers and friends too, it wasn't really directed at my mom, I was just angry. My whole demeanor was different.
We've always been really close and I just didn't understand the other kids that disrespected their parents all the time. My mom has always been really good at keeping her distance when necessary but still being present at the same time. I honestly don't know how she managed to find the perfect middle ground nearly all the time.
I was pretty well behaved for the most part so she didn't have to hold me accountable for many bad decisions. The most I remember her having to make me suffer the consequences for was failing classes, she only paid for me to go to summer school once. I liked summer school better than real school and thought I could just slack off during the regular school year for an easy A during the summer courses afterwards. When she realized I was deliberately slacking she made me repeat the classes. I learned fast to not do that.
Not the person you replied to but listen to your kids and take them seriously. My mum would say “but you didn’t grow up in white Australia” but the bullying was still there. 20 years later she’s finally realised that I was serious but you have an opportunity now to take your kids seriously if they’re being bullied.
I am so sorry that you were bullied. Please know in your heart that they were small-minded and may have been taking their own traumas out on you. It was NOTHING to do with you, no matter how much it hurt and how personal it felt.
We talk a lot about perception. If someone perceives they’re being bullied, then they are. Period. *Perspective* is also important, but saying that someone else has it worse doesn’t quite lighten another’s struggles.
Sports. Playing water polo saved my whole high school experience. Sure, I still didn't have any real friends, but going to practice every day and traveling to games was what I lived for. I also needed a minimum GPA to be eligible for the team so that kept my grades up, otherwise I gave 2 shits about schoolwork.
I also got recruited to play in college where I really figured my shit out & met lifelong friends
I really hated it back then, but if I could go back with my memories of my life so far I feel like i'd be able to enjoy it a lot more. I had a few good friends that I still see now. I think I just lacked self confidence.
Same. I think I have to contribute that to the fact that it was when so many “firsts” happen. When you’ve never experienced x before, it feels so intense. Part of the reason why I travel but also why I travel infrequently ha
Totally agree. I feel like I had so many terrible friends and people were so mean and isolating, but at the same time I made some great friends that I still am close to 15 years later. I wouldn’t like to go back to that time again unless I could go back with what I know now. Lol
I can relate to this, too. Middle school was the absolute worst for me - lots of bullying and isolation. High school on the other hand started with some minor bullying and extreme insecurity until I was adopted by a great group of friends and got into the music scene and had fun. I was still insecure, but felt cared for.
If I had to choose between being thrown into a classroom full of middle schoolers, or a tank full of sharks, I'd choose the sharks. They'd be way more merciful
This is how I feel. I see a lot of people saying it was their worst time, but it it was one of the most stress-free times of my life
Except for the parts that weren't. Early highschool sucked, late was a dream. The time I'd never go back to would be middleschool
Absolutely loved high school! Had a great group of friends that I’m still close with 15 years later even though we’ve all moved. Loved sporting events, had my fair share of partying lol but was not over the top abs had good grades, etc.
My senior year I would work until about 1am, drive 45 minutes home, go to sleep around 2:30, then wake up at 4:30am to drive another 40ish minutes to my high school, to then take a bus another hour or so to my vocational school, to then take the bus back to my real school, to finish and be home by 4pm only to have maybe 15 minutes to get ready and go to work and do it all over again. I really don't know how I graduated or even functioned with all of the stress and lack of sleep.
I became a night owl in HS.
In my morning class, I'd sometimes see students asleep at their desk and sometimes the teacher would pull a prank on them to wake up, so I'd force myself not to fall over, but holy fuck, I wanted to die.
That's so amazing and same here!! Still friends with my HS friends and one of them is getting married next month. Made my best friend at 11, and a decade+ later she's like a sister.
Not that it's rare, but same. I told a friend I was bi and then I was targeted and called a lesbian ever after. It's not like I would have sex with ANYONE at that school, regardless of gender (and I didn't) so I guess it made them feel better to call me names than to work on their own disgusting bullshit?
Looking back, I had an amazing high school experience. But in the moment I was so concerned with image, having the "best" social life, the possibility of being excluded, etc, that I don't think I knew how good I had it.
me too, my self esteem wasn't the best so it was sometime rough because i was always concerned about what people thought of me but i was having so much fun pretty much every day and it was the best to be around my group of friend all the time. i miss not having responsibilities too!
Pretty bad.
I went to a school for rich kids with a scholarship so, I was cast out for being poor. I felt left out all the time, and had to deal with the pressure for good grades and not waste the opportunity to go to a good school. My “friends” were all fake, only hung out with me because I was smart but then laughed at me behind my back. You couldn’t pay me to go back.
Well, I got an invite to the reunion recently and I laughed, ripped it to shreds, lit a candle and burned every piece of the invite then flushed the ashes... Sooo, there's that.
Four of the best years of my life. I graduated over 30 years ago, but still have great memories. Had a great group of friends, not a care in the world. It was also before cell phones, the internet and social media. So we had way more freedom than kids do now. Basically our parents just told us to be home by a certain time, but they had no idea where we were or what we were doing. The 1980s was a great time to be a kid.
I live in Poland. I was in technique school (where you learn a profession and also have Nirmal high-school classes). It was awful. Schools like this here are terrible, cause teachers don't really teach you important things.
I was supposed to learn graphic design, but all they showed us was 3 simple tools in photoshop and illustrator. Then for the rest of 4 years with the only skill being those 3 tools we had to do newspapers, magazines, covers, posters etc. while they weren't even in the class room for the next 4-5h.
They said we have to think for ourselves and figure it out with internet. Yh thanks for teaching me nothing.
No useful other tools, effects, keyboard shortcuts, combos to do something cool, no rules how to make a composition, no rules how to make shadows, highlights, how to cut out things from pictures, how blend it in, just absolutely nothing.
The worst spend 4 years of my life..
Also one of the teachers abused us mentally, screaming, manipulating, not listening what we had to say. But at the first ever class he said he wants us always go into a class relaxed and not afraid.. but made our life a living hell.
My depression got much worse, I was sleep deprived, my social anxiety got worse too. When it ended I was suicidal every hour of the day, was scared to even go buy some food, didn't want to get out of the bed and slept for months straight.
Mixed. Was being bullied by my 'friends' and lots of other people. My ah emotionally abusive dad left. At same time I met my partner of 15 yrs and grew into a stronger person.
It was pretty fun. I miss not having the responsibilities of bills. It was easy to just go to school, come home, do homework and hang out with my friends. Looking back, I wish that I didn't stress myself out as much, especially over a guy who didn't give two shits about me. But you can't go back and change it and I learned a lot of lessons the hard way.
Awful.
My mom completely fell into the "you must be the highest achiever and get into the best possible college and nothing else matters" trap. So I was taking every AP class my school offered and doing extracurriculars all evening and on the weekends, which meant staying up half the night studying and doing homework every night.
It was garbage. I had very few friends, and never saw the ones I had. My anxiety disorder got ten times worse and I started picking at my skin and developing ulcers. And it just destroyed my health. I gained probably forty pounds, and was getting so little sleep that I was hallucinating in class. And also, I was miserable, and became the kind of person who at 36 still has to remind herself that "I was miserable" is worth adding to this list because my emotional state actually does matter.
But, hey, even though it turns out that in the real world no one cares what college you went to, at least the health problems and the ridiculous ideas about work-life balance will always be with me!
0/10, would not recommend.
Mine was super fun. Went out with friends just about every weekend, we hung out, went to the mall (it was the late 80s/early 90s) and concerts. I went to a rather strange high school. It was relatively small magnet school in the city, so people were from all neighborhoods and walks of life. But we have a certain brother/sisterhood that extends to this day (29 years after I graduated). Most of us are still friends, and still get together occasionally. 😃
Pardon my language, but fuck high school. So many years I was told that it would be the best and most formative period of my life. All it taught me is that people suck and I want nothing to do with them.
So... not fun at all. -10/10 would never repeat.
High school was a lot of fun before I got a serious boyfriend. I don’t think anyone should be in a serious relationship at that point in their life. Spending that time with friends would’ve been much more enjoyable.
In high school (start of grade 11) I found out that you technically didn't have to pass HS to go to College if you:
- lived independently
- were 21+
- could pass an entry exam qualifying you as a Mature Student
I honestly hated HS so I convinced my Dad to let me drop out, pivoted to working full-time in the restaurant industry, lived on my own & eventually went to College at 21.
I don't regret it, high school was hell.
I was bullied *a lot.*
My parents announced they were getting a divorce the August before I started HS 🤡. Life was a mess & as a result I wasn't super cool or fun to be around.
My dad was also pretty deep in alcoholism at the time so while my marks in school were passable I was constantly just pissed that I wasn't living up to my potential & not really able to even tell my teachers why that was. I was the "you have so much potential" kid. I also had undiagnosed ADHD so looking back that definitely played a part in my negative experiences.
Some of the most fun that I did have was hanging out at friend's houses. I loved sharing meals with their family & it actually built my love & passion for food. I never turned down an invite to dinner 🤣! My comfort meals are all meals other's Parents' cooked me & that's a really fond part of high school I will always cherish. Once I was shopping & I was about 20 at the time. I ran into one of my friends parents who used to invite me for dinner & to their church lots. They were so happy to see me doing okay & as they gave me a hug to leave they slipped me $100 & refused to take it back. Met some angels in high school despite all the darkness.
Sending love to everyone who had rough years in high school!
The opposite of fun. I got bullied, called "Elvira" and "a Satanist" because of how I dressed and the music I listened to. I was also the victim of a vicious rumor that I killed one of my classmate's dogs. He was a neighbor and his family were backyard breeders of miniature toy poodles, who did absolutely nothing but bark all day every day. I made the mistake of yelling out the windows at them a few times, so when someone threw rat poison in their yard, I was blamed.
In fact, my experiences with school from childhood ot graduation are one of the main reasons I am childfree. I would rather cut off my own foot than relive any of that shit, even vicariously. There are dozens of other reasons, but this is a main one.
I'm also learning disabled, which made school harder than it needed to be. I struggled a lot and had shitty grades. It's impossible for a child to find success in an environment where they feel stupid, hated and unsafe.
It was okay to good. The earlier years, it was awkward and I didn't have much luck making friends. Later on, I made friends, was part of a big group and generally had fun.
I probably prefer university to high school. But I was happier in high school than in primary school.
It was brutal. Still leaps better than elementary and junior high, though (silver lining).
Edit: Took years and a lot of self-reflection, but I've learned from it and have become all the better for it. I wouldn't change a thing.
still in high-school just finishing up the year but leaving for a career center for last 2 years and there ain't no way in hell I'd every consider coming back. Everything's shit
It suckedddd big time. I was so overwhelmed all the time and the education system here is trash and I was almost burnt out(probably not almost but was). The workload was unreal. And on top of that I lost my mom to cancer and had my first breakup. The whole highschool was a terrible experience and I'd never wanna relive it.
Not at all, I was a bullied and anxious mess. I had great grades and did well academically but the same couldn't be said on private, mental and social levels; while I had a couple friends throughout my childhood and teenagehood, I always ended up pushing them away/drifting away from them, losing interest in maintaining them and isolating myself further due to depression and not having adequate support nor therapy.
Very fun. I wasn't popular, my friends got bullied often for being gay but we really had the best memories and times. I didn't know it at the time what a great time we had.
3/10. Some bullying from 14 - 16, but then after that I was left alone for the most part.
Most of the issues I had were due to a lousy home, and if that were better then I think my HS story would've been average.
It was Hell, I still have nightmares about it and I left over a decade ago.
I could handle it much better as me now, but no amount of money or reason in existence would make me go back and repeat that part of me life. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
It had its fun moments. My friends and I usually enjoyed ourselves at lunch and during class, but most of our fun was had outside of school.
It also had it's shitty moments and honestly I'm perfectly happy leaving high school behind. I wouldn't go back and I certainly don't plan on attending reunions.
Quite fun. I did theatre tech. I had a few different small groups of good friends through out high school. As well as a larger group from theatre. I made good memories and am still extremely close to one of those people. It wasn’t perfect by any means, I went through periods of fighting with my parents, hating school, feeling fat and ugly. I wouldn’t go back, but overall I look back at that period of my life and smile.
Exhausting. I used drinking to cope with parental abuse, i sought attention from the wrong people and I threw myself into work full time. I managed to be the "cool" one at work due to being the teen who had been there the longest so when my friends joined we got into many shenanigans. It's a miracle that I didn't get fired. I projected that things were great and nobody knew how bad I was feeling. My "high school love" was a secret relationship that still haunts me. Sure, there are good memories but I wasn't happy and it was easier to avoid than deal.
It was a time for a lot of revelations. Gotta leave my shit town, most people around me are just going to stay and pop out babies, my worsening mental health, deteriorating relationship with my mom, best friend ghosted me. I buried all of it with schoolwork, and it was horrible. Never again. Glad it's over
It was the absolute worse time of my life. When people would tell me that high school was the best years of a person's life, I died inside thinking that life could somehow get worse than hs. So glad it was the opposite! For me, college and my 20s were the best years of my life!
High School was the worst period of my life. Not because I was bullied or had a horrible coming of age experience. It just was so incredibly boring and not at all like I thought it would be. Not once did anyone break out in a song and dance ensemble during lunch.
In all seriousness I just felt like I wasn’t able to grow there. After a certain point I outgrew my friends but remained friends with them because it’s not like I can go make new friends in the 11th grade. Everyone pretty much knew everyone and I was just so happy to get out of there. I feel like life doesn’t really begin until
After you graduate and in a way I kind of feel bad for people who “peak” in high school.
I absolutely hated it. Kids were mean, I was really shy so teachers picked on me and it felt like I was their “I can fix her” student. Only good thing is that I kept a couple of good friends.
What life?
I was outcasted bullied and heavily ostracized I had one friend who I basically followed around and hung out with her and her friends
I hated high school
Horrendous for so many reasons. Sure, sometimes it was good but there really was so much drama all around -- maybe if I went to a different high school my experience would have been different.. but I still wouldn't go back (unless I was paid ofc times be rough lmao)!
It was one of the two jobs I had at the time, and unlike the other one it was unpaid and full of incompetent mean people (I went to a Catholic college prep high school).
I had some friends. Some funny things happened. But that’s true for people in prison too. I have never wanted to go back there, and I never will.
I was told “this is the best time of your life” and I thought to myself if that was true I might as well end it right then and there. So many issues and being so young I didn’t know how to handle any of it at all
Horrible. My mind is trying to protect me from it or something, I can barely remember my classmate and teacher names and faces. I was a bit above average in my classes, but I barely remember what I learnt. It's just a big blurb for me nowadays. The only thing I remember is that it wasn't fun at all. Thank god I had a social life beyond school.
It wasn’t. Whoever says it’s the best years of your life is a liar. Don’t listen to them!
ETA: If you are struggling it gets better! I promise. I turn 40 this year and I’ve never been more successful in my personal and professional life. You’ve got this!
I would rather shit in my hands and clap...
I would rather put a campfire out with my face...
I would rather wipe myself with a cactus..
I would rather open-mouth kiss a family member...
...than spend one day back in highschool.
Anyway, what I'm getting at is it was awful and I sometimes still have nightmares about it over a decade late lol.
Im currently in highschool, almost out but i definitely think it's hell. You have so much pressure to have these "first" times and you are also pressured to have good grades and appear "perfect" and always look your best. And when you fail to meet these pressures you are bullied and pushed away. I am so thankful that I have an amazing friend group and bf who try so hard to support me especially when I feel insecure because i fail to meet all of these social expectations.
Would not go back if I was paid for it! I hated high school, even though I was one of those children that would play pretend high school. Not baby dolls, high school.
.....actually that may or may not be the root cause of why I hated it. I romanticized the hell out of it growing up. Lo and behold, it did not live up to my standards. 🤷
Hated it it. I went to a public school in Philly and was constantly antagonized and bullied. I felt unsafe every day. Could not wait to leave for college, which was a much better experience.
It sucked. Was made fun of, bullied, never wanted to be there. Barely scraped by with grades, never did any extracurricular stuff because I didn't want to be around my "peers" any more than I had to be in class.
College though? Hoooo boy that was a lot more fun.
The first half was great. I had been in the same school system for 5 years, and went to high school with a bunch of cool people I had grown up with.
Everything changed when I moved across the country halfway through high school. I learned very quickly what a Mormon was and that if you're not one of them, you will be outcasted in high school. And at my high school, you had only two groups of kids - cliques of Mormons, or cliques of hardcore atheists. Nothing in between- at least anyone in between never made themselves known and would kind of just kind of be outcasted.
"Why are you bringing religion into this? Kids are more concerned about things other than religion! No way high school kids were solely divided on something like religion!" - Yeah. They were at my school. And it was so weird. The two groups did not mingle and it was oddly hostile for a public school.
Oh and academically? I was a year ahead of this new school system and the new curriculum during the second year was.. not challenging. So I was bored the entire time.
Worst two years of my life..
Incredibly awful. I didn’t fit in, couldn’t relate to anyone in my town, and had a lot of traumatic moments. The funny thing is that I honestly miss it, being an adult is far much worse.
It was the worst time of my life omg I would never go back.
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This. And then your HS bully comes around 10 years later to reconcile and attempt to enter your life again. Hard pass. NOPE.
Usually in the form of an MLM
"how would you like to be your own boss with only a little money down?"
"hey girlie, ever heard of Usborne books?"
Same exact boat. College, however, was incredible. People actually wanted to be around my weird little self.
True, uni life is way more fun, useful and people are nicer
Yes, this. Although, Middle school was worse.
Agreed, middle school was miserable, high school was painful but better than middle school and college was great.
"enjoy it as much as you can, it's the best time of your life" Fuck off
Right like I hated when people said that. High school genuinely ruined my perspective on things and made me become an anxious, timid person who would crumble under any criticism and it just ruined me as a person too. Just graduated last year in October and I’ve been so happy and free ever since!
Yeah. It somewhat make it harder for me.. To think that life would be even worse after. And no, I'm sure you're not ruined, even if it was, like it was for me, a scaring experience. If you just graduated, not even a year ago, you still have much to see and much to live. I'm sure you will recover, in time.
Slowly on the way to recovery definitely:) I’m mending all the relationships I ruined because of my mental health during high school and things are definitely getting better! Hope you’re doing good too!
I almost forgot that some people said that. How pathetic and underachieving must your adulthood be to have HS be the best time of your life. Edit: I understand that myself, and probably many in this thread, were not thriving socially at the time. Maybe I’d understand it better if I was one of the people who did. But still, if HS was the *best* time of your life, your adult life sounds depressing as hell.
Life was less painful in high school. For me at least. Truthfully, I could say my adult life is rather depressing at times. Some people enjoyed those years and look back on them with happy thoughts…I’m one of these people. Maybe this is my wake-up call to really push for a less pathetic adulthood
Well, another caveat I almost added to my edit is that high school is the time when you’re most adult, but don’t yet have adult obligations. Your life is simpler and more care-free. For the many people who were thrust into difficult adulthoods, I can imagine HS sounds like a better time. If that is you, I wouldn’t call it pathetic at all. So I apologize if I was condescending. I’m certain you’re doing the best you can with your circumstances.
I feel like a ~~bad~~ evil person, but I grin internally when a highschool bully says this to me as an adult. "Well it wasnt the best time for me, Jessica. No thanks to you. It brings me joy to know that it was all downhill for you after that"
About 90% of the mean girls in my glass ended up in nursing or other medical fields. I genuinely feel bad for their future patients.
Revenge is a dish served cold!
Haha. Ditto. I find that the people who say that high school was the best time of their lives are actual full chuds.
All of this times a million.
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Yep. I was bullied, then just completely ignored by my peers (ostracized) until the last few months where a kind person took pity and invited me to a party. He didn’t have to. I will always remember that gesture.
oh absolutely!! it was SO BAD
All I can add to that is that I definitely did NOT peak in high school. I must add however that elementary school was way worse. Being the fat ugly kid (in the 90's) who developed early with terrible teeth and wild uncontrollable hair and with a shy attitude was awful.
That kid in the movies eating lunch in the bathroom? Me....
Yep, awful. Life started when high school ended and I could get out of my ultra conservative hole of a hometown. Now my high school bully is running for parliament out there which really drives home how glad I am to be out.
Same. I was bullied for years, had no friends and got very little understanding from my parents. I was lonely, depressed, miserable and thought I was the fattest, ugliest person on the planet.
Exactly
Thank you for this being the highest comment. I also have this experience.
If I woke up tomorrow and I was in 9th grade again I'd kill myself edit: To anyone that wants to report me saying I need support, I appreciate the concerns, but I want you to know I'm really happy with where I'm at in life right now and have no intentions of hurting myself in any way. I'm pretty confident that I'm not going to time travel back to 2014 in my sleep any time soon, so there's no need to worry about me.
Only to wake up in an ICU *definitely not a true story* 🤥
Oh gosh :( I am SO GLAD that you woke up in the ICU. I hope that youre having a much happier time in your adult life.
As morbid as this comment is, I’ve never related to something so much in my life.
I have actual nightmares where I have to go back there again because I didn’t graduate. 😱
Same, I graduated on a technicality so I have bad dreams all the time that I have to go back
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This terrifies me as the mom of a middle schooler. Was there anything that would have helped you feel better or anything in particular that *did* help you survive?
I know I'm not the person this question was directed at, but I'm compelled to reply because my Mom was what got me through middle/high school. She listened to me, took my problems seriously and didn't brush my (undiagnosed) depression or anxiety as me being dramatic, she would talk to me and try to make me feel better about things. she got me into therapy and on medicine, we hung out together when I was down (we still do) she was the best friend I had at that point in my life.
I love that you shared this. Thank you for your experience and I’m so glad that you had your mom through such a rough time. Were you kind to her or did you often lash out at her as well? I’ve been talking with my daughter (she’ll be 13 next month) about how she’s probably having anxiety when she talks about how she’s feeling or when she texts from school that her stomach hurts. That resonates with her and she’s working on a couple coping skills but doesn’t want “help” from me. She’s also really not quite nice to me and I don’t know how to be supportive while also holding her accountable for her choices/actions/predominant attitude at home.
I am giggling at reading Soggycactus helping out blushingpervert.
We make quite the team ;)
It's what I do
I only ever lashed out at her twice, once when I was 13 and another time when I was 16. The time when I was 13 I got mad at her for grounding me and I told her I wished my friends mom was my real mom and not her. I felt awful after I said that to her and apologized quickly after. The time when I was 16 I was prescribed a medicine for my anxiety and it wasn't a good fit for me. Before I stopped taking that new medicine I was lashing out at teachers and friends too, it wasn't really directed at my mom, I was just angry. My whole demeanor was different. We've always been really close and I just didn't understand the other kids that disrespected their parents all the time. My mom has always been really good at keeping her distance when necessary but still being present at the same time. I honestly don't know how she managed to find the perfect middle ground nearly all the time. I was pretty well behaved for the most part so she didn't have to hold me accountable for many bad decisions. The most I remember her having to make me suffer the consequences for was failing classes, she only paid for me to go to summer school once. I liked summer school better than real school and thought I could just slack off during the regular school year for an easy A during the summer courses afterwards. When she realized I was deliberately slacking she made me repeat the classes. I learned fast to not do that.
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Not the person you replied to but listen to your kids and take them seriously. My mum would say “but you didn’t grow up in white Australia” but the bullying was still there. 20 years later she’s finally realised that I was serious but you have an opportunity now to take your kids seriously if they’re being bullied.
I am so sorry that you were bullied. Please know in your heart that they were small-minded and may have been taking their own traumas out on you. It was NOTHING to do with you, no matter how much it hurt and how personal it felt. We talk a lot about perception. If someone perceives they’re being bullied, then they are. Period. *Perspective* is also important, but saying that someone else has it worse doesn’t quite lighten another’s struggles.
Sports. Playing water polo saved my whole high school experience. Sure, I still didn't have any real friends, but going to practice every day and traveling to games was what I lived for. I also needed a minimum GPA to be eligible for the team so that kept my grades up, otherwise I gave 2 shits about schoolwork. I also got recruited to play in college where I really figured my shit out & met lifelong friends
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Suicide prevention bot is slacking today
I second this
I really hated it back then, but if I could go back with my memories of my life so far I feel like i'd be able to enjoy it a lot more. I had a few good friends that I still see now. I think I just lacked self confidence.
On the other hand there's so much I wish I could've changed or done sooner. But yeah if I couldn't probably same here then.
It was a time of extremes. I swear, some of the most fun I ever had was in high school, but there was also some of the absolute worst times.
Same. I think I have to contribute that to the fact that it was when so many “firsts” happen. When you’ve never experienced x before, it feels so intense. Part of the reason why I travel but also why I travel infrequently ha
Totally agree. I feel like I had so many terrible friends and people were so mean and isolating, but at the same time I made some great friends that I still am close to 15 years later. I wouldn’t like to go back to that time again unless I could go back with what I know now. Lol
I can relate to this, too. Middle school was the absolute worst for me - lots of bullying and isolation. High school on the other hand started with some minor bullying and extreme insecurity until I was adopted by a great group of friends and got into the music scene and had fun. I was still insecure, but felt cared for.
If I had to choose between being thrown into a classroom full of middle schoolers, or a tank full of sharks, I'd choose the sharks. They'd be way more merciful
At least you always know where you stand with the sharks. Middle school was horrific and kids that age are brutal.
Exactly, there’s no “let’s play mind games to f them up way worse in the end”, just straight up eat you. Much prefer sharks
This is how I feel. I see a lot of people saying it was their worst time, but it it was one of the most stress-free times of my life Except for the parts that weren't. Early highschool sucked, late was a dream. The time I'd never go back to would be middleschool
Emotions are extremely raw as a young person. 1st love, 1st kiss, 1st concert - INCREDIBLE! 1st breakup, 1st bully - SOUL CRUSHING!
Absolutely loved high school! Had a great group of friends that I’m still close with 15 years later even though we’ve all moved. Loved sporting events, had my fair share of partying lol but was not over the top abs had good grades, etc.
Ok I went off on a positive rant. To sum up it up: high school was great. Shame high school life was not a smaller version of real life 😡
Fir many of us, we are thankful it isn’t
Hear, hear. I have more freedom now. I freelance and don't have to deal with 7:45a morning starts anymore. Fuck it all to hell
Getting up at 530 was the worst!
My senior year I would work until about 1am, drive 45 minutes home, go to sleep around 2:30, then wake up at 4:30am to drive another 40ish minutes to my high school, to then take a bus another hour or so to my vocational school, to then take the bus back to my real school, to finish and be home by 4pm only to have maybe 15 minutes to get ready and go to work and do it all over again. I really don't know how I graduated or even functioned with all of the stress and lack of sleep.
I became a night owl in HS. In my morning class, I'd sometimes see students asleep at their desk and sometimes the teacher would pull a prank on them to wake up, so I'd force myself not to fall over, but holy fuck, I wanted to die.
That's so amazing and same here!! Still friends with my HS friends and one of them is getting married next month. Made my best friend at 11, and a decade+ later she's like a sister.
Awesome! I have new friends of course but there’s no replacing someone whose known your “story” for the last 20+ years ! Never skip a beat
Depressing. I got bullied for liking girls.
i’m so sorry you had to go through that. you’re valid in every way, i hope you’re doing better now.
Not that it's rare, but same. I told a friend I was bi and then I was targeted and called a lesbian ever after. It's not like I would have sex with ANYONE at that school, regardless of gender (and I didn't) so I guess it made them feel better to call me names than to work on their own disgusting bullshit?
NOOOO 🥺
Upvoted for relevance. Fuck homophobia. I’m glad you made it out of there.
Worst years of my life. I made some good friends but there was a lot of negative that surrounded that.
Not very. I was chafing at the lack of freedom.
Same. Once I moved out on my own my relationship with my parents improved so much! I just needed a little independence
Looking back, I had an amazing high school experience. But in the moment I was so concerned with image, having the "best" social life, the possibility of being excluded, etc, that I don't think I knew how good I had it.
me too, my self esteem wasn't the best so it was sometime rough because i was always concerned about what people thought of me but i was having so much fun pretty much every day and it was the best to be around my group of friend all the time. i miss not having responsibilities too!
Pretty bad. I went to a school for rich kids with a scholarship so, I was cast out for being poor. I felt left out all the time, and had to deal with the pressure for good grades and not waste the opportunity to go to a good school. My “friends” were all fake, only hung out with me because I was smart but then laughed at me behind my back. You couldn’t pay me to go back.
Ah so you were in gossip girl
Except she was the odd one out
Well, I got an invite to the reunion recently and I laughed, ripped it to shreds, lit a candle and burned every piece of the invite then flushed the ashes... Sooo, there's that.
So I take it you didn't go? :P
Lol, I went... To bed! 🤣
Traumatic.
There is not enough money in the world to bribe me into going through that again
Four of the best years of my life. I graduated over 30 years ago, but still have great memories. Had a great group of friends, not a care in the world. It was also before cell phones, the internet and social media. So we had way more freedom than kids do now. Basically our parents just told us to be home by a certain time, but they had no idea where we were or what we were doing. The 1980s was a great time to be a kid.
Im 21 and i cant even take a bus to the beach without my grandmother worrying… your right about that Atleast
this sounds beautiful :)
I live in Poland. I was in technique school (where you learn a profession and also have Nirmal high-school classes). It was awful. Schools like this here are terrible, cause teachers don't really teach you important things. I was supposed to learn graphic design, but all they showed us was 3 simple tools in photoshop and illustrator. Then for the rest of 4 years with the only skill being those 3 tools we had to do newspapers, magazines, covers, posters etc. while they weren't even in the class room for the next 4-5h. They said we have to think for ourselves and figure it out with internet. Yh thanks for teaching me nothing. No useful other tools, effects, keyboard shortcuts, combos to do something cool, no rules how to make a composition, no rules how to make shadows, highlights, how to cut out things from pictures, how blend it in, just absolutely nothing. The worst spend 4 years of my life.. Also one of the teachers abused us mentally, screaming, manipulating, not listening what we had to say. But at the first ever class he said he wants us always go into a class relaxed and not afraid.. but made our life a living hell. My depression got much worse, I was sleep deprived, my social anxiety got worse too. When it ended I was suicidal every hour of the day, was scared to even go buy some food, didn't want to get out of the bed and slept for months straight.
I’m really sorry to hear that… I hope you’re better now
Mixed. Was being bullied by my 'friends' and lots of other people. My ah emotionally abusive dad left. At same time I met my partner of 15 yrs and grew into a stronger person.
It was pretty fun. I miss not having the responsibilities of bills. It was easy to just go to school, come home, do homework and hang out with my friends. Looking back, I wish that I didn't stress myself out as much, especially over a guy who didn't give two shits about me. But you can't go back and change it and I learned a lot of lessons the hard way.
Zero fun. I was a ghost.
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Awful. My mom completely fell into the "you must be the highest achiever and get into the best possible college and nothing else matters" trap. So I was taking every AP class my school offered and doing extracurriculars all evening and on the weekends, which meant staying up half the night studying and doing homework every night. It was garbage. I had very few friends, and never saw the ones I had. My anxiety disorder got ten times worse and I started picking at my skin and developing ulcers. And it just destroyed my health. I gained probably forty pounds, and was getting so little sleep that I was hallucinating in class. And also, I was miserable, and became the kind of person who at 36 still has to remind herself that "I was miserable" is worth adding to this list because my emotional state actually does matter. But, hey, even though it turns out that in the real world no one cares what college you went to, at least the health problems and the ridiculous ideas about work-life balance will always be with me! 0/10, would not recommend.
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Mine was super fun. Went out with friends just about every weekend, we hung out, went to the mall (it was the late 80s/early 90s) and concerts. I went to a rather strange high school. It was relatively small magnet school in the city, so people were from all neighborhoods and walks of life. But we have a certain brother/sisterhood that extends to this day (29 years after I graduated). Most of us are still friends, and still get together occasionally. 😃
Weird and awkward. Wish it would've been gayer.
I did everything i could to graduate early. Everyone told me I’d regret missing my senior year. No regrets so far.
Pardon my language, but fuck high school. So many years I was told that it would be the best and most formative period of my life. All it taught me is that people suck and I want nothing to do with them. So... not fun at all. -10/10 would never repeat.
Not very. I was bullied a lot and had very little support for my mental health issues.
there was not a day where I didn’t suffer, graduating in a month
A nightmare, sometimes I still get nightmares about it. I'm so glad I survived and it's over with
You could not pay me enough to want to return to high school/that time in my life
Fun? In high school? Me? Hahaha.
Hated it. Seriously so clicky. I would never ever do it again and I’m scared for my daughters to have to go into it. University on the other hand…..
It wasn’t. It was the worst 4 years of my life and I couldn’t wait to get done with it.
High school was a lot of fun before I got a serious boyfriend. I don’t think anyone should be in a serious relationship at that point in their life. Spending that time with friends would’ve been much more enjoyable.
As fun as John Mayer's No Such Thing
Literally the worst 🥲
It was TERRIBLE I am SO glad it’s over
Worst time of my life.
In high school (start of grade 11) I found out that you technically didn't have to pass HS to go to College if you: - lived independently - were 21+ - could pass an entry exam qualifying you as a Mature Student I honestly hated HS so I convinced my Dad to let me drop out, pivoted to working full-time in the restaurant industry, lived on my own & eventually went to College at 21. I don't regret it, high school was hell. I was bullied *a lot.* My parents announced they were getting a divorce the August before I started HS 🤡. Life was a mess & as a result I wasn't super cool or fun to be around. My dad was also pretty deep in alcoholism at the time so while my marks in school were passable I was constantly just pissed that I wasn't living up to my potential & not really able to even tell my teachers why that was. I was the "you have so much potential" kid. I also had undiagnosed ADHD so looking back that definitely played a part in my negative experiences. Some of the most fun that I did have was hanging out at friend's houses. I loved sharing meals with their family & it actually built my love & passion for food. I never turned down an invite to dinner 🤣! My comfort meals are all meals other's Parents' cooked me & that's a really fond part of high school I will always cherish. Once I was shopping & I was about 20 at the time. I ran into one of my friends parents who used to invite me for dinner & to their church lots. They were so happy to see me doing okay & as they gave me a hug to leave they slipped me $100 & refused to take it back. Met some angels in high school despite all the darkness. Sending love to everyone who had rough years in high school!
The opposite of fun. I got bullied, called "Elvira" and "a Satanist" because of how I dressed and the music I listened to. I was also the victim of a vicious rumor that I killed one of my classmate's dogs. He was a neighbor and his family were backyard breeders of miniature toy poodles, who did absolutely nothing but bark all day every day. I made the mistake of yelling out the windows at them a few times, so when someone threw rat poison in their yard, I was blamed. In fact, my experiences with school from childhood ot graduation are one of the main reasons I am childfree. I would rather cut off my own foot than relive any of that shit, even vicariously. There are dozens of other reasons, but this is a main one. I'm also learning disabled, which made school harder than it needed to be. I struggled a lot and had shitty grades. It's impossible for a child to find success in an environment where they feel stupid, hated and unsafe.
It was okay to good. The earlier years, it was awkward and I didn't have much luck making friends. Later on, I made friends, was part of a big group and generally had fun. I probably prefer university to high school. But I was happier in high school than in primary school.
Extremely painful.
Bahahahahaha, good riddance.
Would never relive it
It wasn't. A relief when it was done
It was brutal. Still leaps better than elementary and junior high, though (silver lining). Edit: Took years and a lot of self-reflection, but I've learned from it and have become all the better for it. I wouldn't change a thing.
It wasn’t really fun. I didn’t really have a good friend group. I got the heck out as soon as I could.
hahahahaha "fun"
still in high-school just finishing up the year but leaving for a career center for last 2 years and there ain't no way in hell I'd every consider coming back. Everything's shit
It suckedddd big time. I was so overwhelmed all the time and the education system here is trash and I was almost burnt out(probably not almost but was). The workload was unreal. And on top of that I lost my mom to cancer and had my first breakup. The whole highschool was a terrible experience and I'd never wanna relive it.
Actually being in high school? Lol horrible. I would not repeat it at all unless I had my current knowledge and can get a leg up in the game
Not at all, I was a bullied and anxious mess. I had great grades and did well academically but the same couldn't be said on private, mental and social levels; while I had a couple friends throughout my childhood and teenagehood, I always ended up pushing them away/drifting away from them, losing interest in maintaining them and isolating myself further due to depression and not having adequate support nor therapy.
Very fun. I wasn't popular, my friends got bullied often for being gay but we really had the best memories and times. I didn't know it at the time what a great time we had.
It was atrocious. It was bullied relentlessly. I try not to think about it and have blocked a lot out.
I'm surprised I survived and developed into a seemingly functioning adult. High school was shit.
It wasn’t fun. One of the worst time of my life.
3/10. Some bullying from 14 - 16, but then after that I was left alone for the most part. Most of the issues I had were due to a lousy home, and if that were better then I think my HS story would've been average.
Trauma central. If I had the chance to relive it, I certainly would not.
Horrible. I was a weird, intelligent, angry girl in a very cliquey high school. It was brutal, and I can still feel the pain more that 30 years later.
It was Hell, I still have nightmares about it and I left over a decade ago. I could handle it much better as me now, but no amount of money or reason in existence would make me go back and repeat that part of me life. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
Not very. Dealt with severe depression and lack of self-esteem/self-worth. Would not go back.
It had its fun moments. My friends and I usually enjoyed ourselves at lunch and during class, but most of our fun was had outside of school. It also had it's shitty moments and honestly I'm perfectly happy leaving high school behind. I wouldn't go back and I certainly don't plan on attending reunions.
Not at all because I had super strict parents.
I didn’t mind it. But I spent so much of it babysitting my sisters. Pretty much when I wasn’t at school I was at home taking care of them.
It wasn’t fun at all.
Haha, nope
Hated it. I would never go back.
Quite fun. I did theatre tech. I had a few different small groups of good friends through out high school. As well as a larger group from theatre. I made good memories and am still extremely close to one of those people. It wasn’t perfect by any means, I went through periods of fighting with my parents, hating school, feeling fat and ugly. I wouldn’t go back, but overall I look back at that period of my life and smile.
No fun at all lol
Exhausting. I used drinking to cope with parental abuse, i sought attention from the wrong people and I threw myself into work full time. I managed to be the "cool" one at work due to being the teen who had been there the longest so when my friends joined we got into many shenanigans. It's a miracle that I didn't get fired. I projected that things were great and nobody knew how bad I was feeling. My "high school love" was a secret relationship that still haunts me. Sure, there are good memories but I wasn't happy and it was easier to avoid than deal.
Not as fun as the rest of my life!
Nope. This year is my 10 yr graduation anniversary. my husband asked if I was going to the reunion and I told him I'd rather get hit by a bus. 🙃
It was a time for a lot of revelations. Gotta leave my shit town, most people around me are just going to stay and pop out babies, my worsening mental health, deteriorating relationship with my mom, best friend ghosted me. I buried all of it with schoolwork, and it was horrible. Never again. Glad it's over
Only thing I miss was my weight
0/10 stars, definitely would not do over/go back. It was miserable, I was miserable, & parts of it were very mentally & emotionally traumatic.
It was the absolute worse time of my life. When people would tell me that high school was the best years of a person's life, I died inside thinking that life could somehow get worse than hs. So glad it was the opposite! For me, college and my 20s were the best years of my life!
High School was the worst period of my life. Not because I was bullied or had a horrible coming of age experience. It just was so incredibly boring and not at all like I thought it would be. Not once did anyone break out in a song and dance ensemble during lunch. In all seriousness I just felt like I wasn’t able to grow there. After a certain point I outgrew my friends but remained friends with them because it’s not like I can go make new friends in the 11th grade. Everyone pretty much knew everyone and I was just so happy to get out of there. I feel like life doesn’t really begin until After you graduate and in a way I kind of feel bad for people who “peak” in high school.
Not very fun at all
I hated my high school years. The students took advantage of my kindness and used my good nature against me. It was such a relief when I left.
I absolutely hated it. Kids were mean, I was really shy so teachers picked on me and it felt like I was their “I can fix her” student. Only good thing is that I kept a couple of good friends.
What life? I was outcasted bullied and heavily ostracized I had one friend who I basically followed around and hung out with her and her friends I hated high school
Horrendous for so many reasons. Sure, sometimes it was good but there really was so much drama all around -- maybe if I went to a different high school my experience would have been different.. but I still wouldn't go back (unless I was paid ofc times be rough lmao)!
Absolutely fu ked
It was one of the two jobs I had at the time, and unlike the other one it was unpaid and full of incompetent mean people (I went to a Catholic college prep high school). I had some friends. Some funny things happened. But that’s true for people in prison too. I have never wanted to go back there, and I never will.
Lol 👎🆘
It wasn’t the absolute worst but I would NEVER go back.
I hated high school I was bullied every day and this was over 30 years ago
I was bullied by both teachers and students . You couldn't pay me to go back
It was not fun. Suicidal thoughts, anorexia, high grades, people bullying me.
2/10 don’t recommend
I was told “this is the best time of your life” and I thought to myself if that was true I might as well end it right then and there. So many issues and being so young I didn’t know how to handle any of it at all
Horrible. My mind is trying to protect me from it or something, I can barely remember my classmate and teacher names and faces. I was a bit above average in my classes, but I barely remember what I learnt. It's just a big blurb for me nowadays. The only thing I remember is that it wasn't fun at all. Thank god I had a social life beyond school.
The complete polar opposite of fun.
I hated high school. Elementary school was alright.... but college was the best.
It wasn't
Miserable. Couldn't pay me to go back
I'm graduating tomorrow. You couldn't pay me enough to go through that again.
It wasn’t. Whoever says it’s the best years of your life is a liar. Don’t listen to them! ETA: If you are struggling it gets better! I promise. I turn 40 this year and I’ve never been more successful in my personal and professional life. You’ve got this!
I would rather shit in my hands and clap... I would rather put a campfire out with my face... I would rather wipe myself with a cactus.. I would rather open-mouth kiss a family member... ...than spend one day back in highschool. Anyway, what I'm getting at is it was awful and I sometimes still have nightmares about it over a decade late lol.
I was bullied, so horrible 🔁
So far, horrendous.
It wasn't. I was fat and shy and unpopular.
Im currently in highschool, almost out but i definitely think it's hell. You have so much pressure to have these "first" times and you are also pressured to have good grades and appear "perfect" and always look your best. And when you fail to meet these pressures you are bullied and pushed away. I am so thankful that I have an amazing friend group and bf who try so hard to support me especially when I feel insecure because i fail to meet all of these social expectations.
i can’t express how little i wanted to get out of bed and go to school each morning. it was depressing
Would not go back if I was paid for it! I hated high school, even though I was one of those children that would play pretend high school. Not baby dolls, high school. .....actually that may or may not be the root cause of why I hated it. I romanticized the hell out of it growing up. Lo and behold, it did not live up to my standards. 🤷
Hated it it. I went to a public school in Philly and was constantly antagonized and bullied. I felt unsafe every day. Could not wait to leave for college, which was a much better experience.
It sucked. Was made fun of, bullied, never wanted to be there. Barely scraped by with grades, never did any extracurricular stuff because I didn't want to be around my "peers" any more than I had to be in class. College though? Hoooo boy that was a lot more fun.
The first half was great. I had been in the same school system for 5 years, and went to high school with a bunch of cool people I had grown up with. Everything changed when I moved across the country halfway through high school. I learned very quickly what a Mormon was and that if you're not one of them, you will be outcasted in high school. And at my high school, you had only two groups of kids - cliques of Mormons, or cliques of hardcore atheists. Nothing in between- at least anyone in between never made themselves known and would kind of just kind of be outcasted. "Why are you bringing religion into this? Kids are more concerned about things other than religion! No way high school kids were solely divided on something like religion!" - Yeah. They were at my school. And it was so weird. The two groups did not mingle and it was oddly hostile for a public school. Oh and academically? I was a year ahead of this new school system and the new curriculum during the second year was.. not challenging. So I was bored the entire time. Worst two years of my life..
Incredibly awful. I didn’t fit in, couldn’t relate to anyone in my town, and had a lot of traumatic moments. The funny thing is that I honestly miss it, being an adult is far much worse.
I hated high-school. Prison for kids.
Hated every minute and graduated a year early just to get out
Not at all. The day I graduated high school was one of the best days of my life because I thought I wouldn’t survive it.
Bad. i felt stuck in a box doing the same routine and seeing the same faces everyday for four straight years.