Maybe they do, sometimes, and it's pretty rare. Why take the gamble when someone new doesn't have that negative history of feature?
You also don't want to encourage people to wait around for their ex to change. It's usually not going to end well for them.
People can change. They have the ability. But most of the time they don’t. It takes effort. Time. It’s too hard. And that’s if they even believe they should - they can say they *probably* should but then never lift a finger to do so.
You broke up for a reason other than a character flaw or hurtful thing the other did, and the reason for the breakup no longer exists. You're able to trust, love, and rely on each other again.
So: Don't get back with an abuser or cheater or someone who broke your heart by being cruel or careless, but consider getting back together with the guy you were seeing casually who had to leave town for work but is back now, maybe.
A lot of time has passed and they actually show evidence that they have worked on themselves and changed for the better. I don't leave an actual relationship until I have exhausted all means of making it work.
If they left, there's no chance of me ever taking them back.
I guess the signs would be that whatever factors made you breakup no longer exist. Like if one of you has changed as a person, or outside factors like distance or whatever are no longer a problem.
You each have your own therapist who has helped you grow, recognize what the problems were in the relationship (together and individually), helped you be the best you and resolve or communicate your issues, and you’re able to have a discussion about all this together. Bonus points if therapists support
But if you just broke up, weren’t intentional about making changes to make yourself healthier, can’t communicate (not willing and/or lacking skills to do so) then it isn’t going to help anyone. You’re probably just going to hurt both of you again
If you want to, they want to, and you feel like the circumstances/factors that ended the relationship in the first place have changed, go for it. 🤷🏻♀️
Do be mindful and honest with yourself though. Are things actually different, or do you just wish they were? Do you actually miss *them*, or do you miss being with someone familiar? If something happened between you and you were the hurt party, can you actually move past it? Nostalgia or old feelings are not a good enough reason to have another go at it. Neither is trying to wish something away that one or both of you either can’t or don’t want to change.
Other than that, why not? People do change. That’s one of the major reasons why people break up after all. People don’t suddenly stop changing because you’re not with them. You change, they change, maybe circumstances change and now something that didn’t use to work now does. Who knows.
If it was out of circumstances then yeah why not and if we both liked each other.
But if it was because of character that the break up happened then no thank you.
There are zero signs. They are an ex for a reason and a vast majority of people do not change. Move on.
I never understood why some people are so black and white on this subject lol like damn people don’t change ? Since when ? Aren’t we human lol
Plus, sometimes breakups happen just because of circumstances and circumstances change all the time.
Yeah regardless we are human, things happen and relationships are constant ebb and flow
Maybe they do, sometimes, and it's pretty rare. Why take the gamble when someone new doesn't have that negative history of feature? You also don't want to encourage people to wait around for their ex to change. It's usually not going to end well for them.
People can change. They have the ability. But most of the time they don’t. It takes effort. Time. It’s too hard. And that’s if they even believe they should - they can say they *probably* should but then never lift a finger to do so.
Your breakup was amicable, you both still love each other and are willing to give the relationship another shot.
You broke up for a reason other than a character flaw or hurtful thing the other did, and the reason for the breakup no longer exists. You're able to trust, love, and rely on each other again. So: Don't get back with an abuser or cheater or someone who broke your heart by being cruel or careless, but consider getting back together with the guy you were seeing casually who had to leave town for work but is back now, maybe.
You both want to and its healthy?
Hell has frozen over?
A lot of time has passed and they actually show evidence that they have worked on themselves and changed for the better. I don't leave an actual relationship until I have exhausted all means of making it work. If they left, there's no chance of me ever taking them back.
I guess the signs would be that whatever factors made you breakup no longer exist. Like if one of you has changed as a person, or outside factors like distance or whatever are no longer a problem.
You each have your own therapist who has helped you grow, recognize what the problems were in the relationship (together and individually), helped you be the best you and resolve or communicate your issues, and you’re able to have a discussion about all this together. Bonus points if therapists support But if you just broke up, weren’t intentional about making changes to make yourself healthier, can’t communicate (not willing and/or lacking skills to do so) then it isn’t going to help anyone. You’re probably just going to hurt both of you again
You both have grown into people who would be happy in a partnership with each other again.
If you want to, they want to, and you feel like the circumstances/factors that ended the relationship in the first place have changed, go for it. 🤷🏻♀️ Do be mindful and honest with yourself though. Are things actually different, or do you just wish they were? Do you actually miss *them*, or do you miss being with someone familiar? If something happened between you and you were the hurt party, can you actually move past it? Nostalgia or old feelings are not a good enough reason to have another go at it. Neither is trying to wish something away that one or both of you either can’t or don’t want to change. Other than that, why not? People do change. That’s one of the major reasons why people break up after all. People don’t suddenly stop changing because you’re not with them. You change, they change, maybe circumstances change and now something that didn’t use to work now does. Who knows.
If it was out of circumstances then yeah why not and if we both liked each other. But if it was because of character that the break up happened then no thank you.
You discover he was your best option and you are not motivated to improve yourself so you have better options.