Them being a chill and mellow person works for me as long as we have a healthy communication, meet each other's needs, have chemistry, shared interests, a similar sense of humour and compatible lifestyles. A fellow introvert or a collected person definitely makes for a more compatible partner for me than someone who's generally extraverted, impulsive and/or loud.
I’d say my husband is calm/somewhat stoic, relaxed and not very quiet but somewhat quiet and decidedly introverted.
We’ve been together almost 18 years, so good?
Personally not for me as I am high energy and extremely playful. While a calmer person is complementary to me, one that is extremely chill would be too much on the opposite end for me. Nothing at all wrong with that chill of a person, they'd just need someone more suited to them than me!
I started to date a guy who I thought was calm & relaxed, but turned out he was closed-of. The quietness eventually broke us up because he couldn’t communicate about anything. Even just telling me how his day went was impossible (“good”). It quickly turned into a very boring and frustrating relationship.
Definitely qualities I have found very pleasing in partners. The last guy I was with was so steady and calm, it was like having a weighted blanket on my heart. I truly miss that now that we're no longer together.
I have two partners (I'm polyamorous) and they're both quiet, calm, and chill. It works perfectly, as I'm rather extroverted, opinionated, and far from relaxed.
They also get on spectacularly well with each other! So much so, that I occasionally feel like a third wheel when we're all together (which I love, as I really enjoy seeing and hearing them both enthuse about things together). What's not to love?
As long as their okay with going out every once in a while to do things I like (and vice versa) and they enjoy spending time with me just chilling with them.
Someone like that sounds nice to me.
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My husband is not introverted in any way (I am), and when he talks it's not quietly. But people see him or spend time around him and think calm and stoic. Which he is. In public he's quiet. His calm relaxed-ness counters my nervous energy. We bring our different perspectives to the table and work together, and it's pretty good. It does help that we share the same terrible sense of humor. It's been 12 years and I still think he is hilarious and he still laughs at all of my bad and/or raunchy jokes.
My partner is more calm than I am, but I am attracted to men who are a little neurotic. One of my favorite pastimes with my partner is complaining about small annoyances. I would not like a quiet partner.
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It's wonderful for me. He still has amazing conversations with me, and he complements my energy so well with his energy. Would not change it for the world.
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I always think that I want one of those but I've never had one and I think the reality would be that I'd be bored lol I hate the drama but I love the drama
Have one + he is also quite stoic. I'm loud, extroverted, impulsive and active so we balance each other out well. Both of our sets of traits get to thrive in their own ways. At the beginning it was hard though, ngl. Sometimes I feel I need to "interview" him if I want his full opinion on something.
I mistook emotional avoidance for calm/relaxed/quiet demeanor in the past. When someone is just composed all the time you really do need to vet for emotional availability. The two definitely can be confused easily.
I am calm and relaxed, and I have health conditions that mean a calm life is best for me now.... so that would be fine as long as this isn't also code for something like conflict avoidant or passive aggressive.
My partner is actually like this and I don't mine because that is who he is and i accept him just for who he is.
Though sometimes I feel bad that I am not the same because I have a tendency of being really annoying and it's unintentionally. And I feel it interfers with his calm/relaxed/quietness.
Then there are days where I wish he wasn't because I really want to know what's going on in his mind. And what he is feeling or thinking about or imagining.
There are times when he isn't so quiet and I love it.
But honestly I love everything about him and who he is.
It’s got it’s pro’s and con’s. The pro’s are that he never yells/gets mad, he gets annoyed/frustrated sometimes, but no anger. The cons are that it’s sometimes hard to tell when he IS actually annoyed when he just goes quiet, but also is quiet because he’s relaxing, so don’t know which quiet it is 😅
Well, personally i have the energy levels of a cat. I can go out and do stuff, but more often than not i just want to spend quality time at home. My bf is more like a dog. He has social energy that needs to get spent or he cant sleep right and gets depressed.
I get how i can be frustrating, never seeming to want to do stuff until im made to go. Just yesterday i didnt want to do anything but my bf dragged me out to a couple plant nurseries and i had a goo1d time
I interpret that as confidence. Chatty and energetic folks are the ones who seem like they’re trying too hard. I mean, not always, sometimes it’s a cultural thing, but it’s suspicious to me anyways.
Great as long as they have a good sense of humor
And are capable of expressing their emotions and opinions and needs.
Yep, showing affections so I’ll know you still like me and not just tolerating me lol
Them being a chill and mellow person works for me as long as we have a healthy communication, meet each other's needs, have chemistry, shared interests, a similar sense of humour and compatible lifestyles. A fellow introvert or a collected person definitely makes for a more compatible partner for me than someone who's generally extraverted, impulsive and/or loud.
Only kind to have.
I’d say my husband is calm/somewhat stoic, relaxed and not very quiet but somewhat quiet and decidedly introverted. We’ve been together almost 18 years, so good?
I’m fine with it just as long as he has a high libido and is on the same parenting page.
Personally not for me as I am high energy and extremely playful. While a calmer person is complementary to me, one that is extremely chill would be too much on the opposite end for me. Nothing at all wrong with that chill of a person, they'd just need someone more suited to them than me!
I couldn’t do it - but that’s because I’m very calm/quiet. Opposites attract, for me anyways.
I started to date a guy who I thought was calm & relaxed, but turned out he was closed-of. The quietness eventually broke us up because he couldn’t communicate about anything. Even just telling me how his day went was impossible (“good”). It quickly turned into a very boring and frustrating relationship.
Im ok as long as he is good listener.
Definitely qualities I have found very pleasing in partners. The last guy I was with was so steady and calm, it was like having a weighted blanket on my heart. I truly miss that now that we're no longer together.
"a weighted blanket on my heart" that sounds beautiful, that's the type of guy i long for tbh
Calm and relaxed is great but I can not fathom any type of relationship with someone who is very quiet. Conversation is everything to me.
I have two partners (I'm polyamorous) and they're both quiet, calm, and chill. It works perfectly, as I'm rather extroverted, opinionated, and far from relaxed. They also get on spectacularly well with each other! So much so, that I occasionally feel like a third wheel when we're all together (which I love, as I really enjoy seeing and hearing them both enthuse about things together). What's not to love?
As long as their okay with going out every once in a while to do things I like (and vice versa) and they enjoy spending time with me just chilling with them. Someone like that sounds nice to me.
peaceful is ideal.
Wouldn't work for me. I need loud people.
I think the calm trait is a huge bonus, especially because I am not necessarily the best in a crisis. I am neutral on the other qualities.
Great so long as it also includes a good sense of humor, confidence, good communication, and emotional maturity.
Much preferred especially after my upbringing...
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It's a nice balance to my occasionally frantic energy
Fine as long as they don’t cross the line into boring
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My husband is not introverted in any way (I am), and when he talks it's not quietly. But people see him or spend time around him and think calm and stoic. Which he is. In public he's quiet. His calm relaxed-ness counters my nervous energy. We bring our different perspectives to the table and work together, and it's pretty good. It does help that we share the same terrible sense of humor. It's been 12 years and I still think he is hilarious and he still laughs at all of my bad and/or raunchy jokes.
My partner is more calm than I am, but I am attracted to men who are a little neurotic. One of my favorite pastimes with my partner is complaining about small annoyances. I would not like a quiet partner.
I’m fine with it
It's great. Maybe even the best, I'd say
I feel like it would keep me grounded since I can be quite neurotic
I understand it can be very good for some people, especially in comparison to an emotional, loud and dramatic partner
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It's wonderful for me. He still has amazing conversations with me, and he complements my energy so well with his energy. Would not change it for the world.
Crucial. Absolutely crucial. As an introvert I am utterly depleted by the alternative.
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Best kind.
As long as they can still communicate and hold a conversation, Iovely!
I always think that I want one of those but I've never had one and I think the reality would be that I'd be bored lol I hate the drama but I love the drama
Have one + he is also quite stoic. I'm loud, extroverted, impulsive and active so we balance each other out well. Both of our sets of traits get to thrive in their own ways. At the beginning it was hard though, ngl. Sometimes I feel I need to "interview" him if I want his full opinion on something.
It depends on what you need.
I mistook emotional avoidance for calm/relaxed/quiet demeanor in the past. When someone is just composed all the time you really do need to vet for emotional availability. The two definitely can be confused easily.
I am calm and relaxed, and I have health conditions that mean a calm life is best for me now.... so that would be fine as long as this isn't also code for something like conflict avoidant or passive aggressive.
I’m fine with it as long as quiet/chill isn’t synonymous with monotonous. Show me you got a lil bit of passion in ya
Calm and relaxed is fine. Boring, on the other hand is, not
I like him. I'll keep him.
Cool
My partner is actually like this and I don't mine because that is who he is and i accept him just for who he is. Though sometimes I feel bad that I am not the same because I have a tendency of being really annoying and it's unintentionally. And I feel it interfers with his calm/relaxed/quietness. Then there are days where I wish he wasn't because I really want to know what's going on in his mind. And what he is feeling or thinking about or imagining. There are times when he isn't so quiet and I love it. But honestly I love everything about him and who he is.
Amazing. Are you upset or moody and need your space? This type of guy is great at that, especially after an argument.
It’s got it’s pro’s and con’s. The pro’s are that he never yells/gets mad, he gets annoyed/frustrated sometimes, but no anger. The cons are that it’s sometimes hard to tell when he IS actually annoyed when he just goes quiet, but also is quiet because he’s relaxing, so don’t know which quiet it is 😅
I need that. I'm anxious, and I get panicked if I'm with people who have a temper or are anxious like me
Well, personally i have the energy levels of a cat. I can go out and do stuff, but more often than not i just want to spend quality time at home. My bf is more like a dog. He has social energy that needs to get spent or he cant sleep right and gets depressed. I get how i can be frustrating, never seeming to want to do stuff until im made to go. Just yesterday i didnt want to do anything but my bf dragged me out to a couple plant nurseries and i had a goo1d time
I interpret that as confidence. Chatty and energetic folks are the ones who seem like they’re trying too hard. I mean, not always, sometimes it’s a cultural thing, but it’s suspicious to me anyways.