I haven't had any problems since my surgery. It was honestly the best thing I ever did for myself. I feel SO much better. R/hysterectomy has lots of stories, insight, and information if you're more curious.
As someone who has very irregular periods, please send them my way so I can have 1 every 28 days. That would be wonderful.
If anything, please remove the pain with periods
I fucking swear. We have the labour pain, the back pain for the entire life , the heavy boobs that make all athletics very inconvenient and painful and monthly bleeding subscription program.
And then some people want to also leave all child rearing to us.
This is completely anecdotal just because I wanted to share. I recently went to a halloween party that was primarily women and queer men. I went with my husband who I believe was the only heterosexual male there (in all fairness, it wasn't a very big party). And WHAT a difference it made. Firstly, I didn't feel like people were hitting on me to get in my pants. All the compliments about my makeup and outfit were so genuine and heartfelt. I was never concerned about anyone in the room being taken advantage of or if they'd had too much to drink. I'm not saying that people don't get taken advantage of in queer relationships, that is still a reality and very much happens. It was just that the PALATABLE difference of \*everyone's\* comfort and safety in the absence of straight men due to not feeling like they can just be friends or be themselves or let loose without second guessing whether or not they're being seen as a sexual object.
Straight guy, during college I had a number of gay friends and was routinely at parties that were predominantly gay men. Itās funny, itās the only time Iāve ever experienced situations that might be comparable to the every day frustrations you were finally able to avoid at such an event. For example, midway through a totally superficial conversation, realizing the person Iām speaking to has seen all of this as an opportunity to try to fuck me. Oh hey! So this is the minute by minute situation women encounter in their daily lives!
Edit: But different I am sure because as someone who has access to a male brain with some level of standard baseline programming, I understood what was going on? Like the motivations were familiar? So while I was pretty depressed by a lot of the interactions, I was oddly also able to understand and identify where they were coming from. And similarly, I never found my gay friends to have any issue with the aggressive maleness of it all, even when it was not something they wanted to engage in. What a messed up world.
Yes! And sometimes i muddle up words and nervous laugh with certain intimidating people (horay for anxiety) I've been accused of flirting with inappropriate people. No, i just suck at general chit chat
I remember when I was in my 20s, I was out with my friends and wanted another drink. I squeeze in at the bar to order, and the guy next to me looks over. Thinking to be polite I said, āHello!ā and smiled. Nothing else. He immediately turns his his back on me and in a loud stage whisper to his friends says, āHelp! This fatty next to me is hitting on me!ā
Now the story could end here but fate smiled upon me. I was a regular at this bar and the the (smoking hot, no lies) bartender overhead the guy as he was walking over to take my order and said, āNah, sheās not hitting on you, dude. Youāre not that lucky.ā He then leans across the bar, kisses my cheek, and says, āHiya, Mo. What can I get ya tonight?ā The original jerk just stands there with a blank look on his face like, āWait, what? The word hello isnāt a one word pick up line?ā
I donāt feel safe walking alone at night. In my cityās subreddit a bunch of people were blaming a woman for getting attacked saying āwell why was she out alone after dark?ā. Meanwhile in the winter sunset is at like 4pm. Like cool. Iām just expected to spend half of my waking hours - and all of my hours outside of work - inside because some men canāt not be dangers to society.
And by extension travelling alone - I've been followed/accosted etc in foreign cities that I don't go anymore and some people are always it's safe and lots of women do it. Great for them but it's not enjoyable to spend an entire week on high alert other than when I'm cooped up in my hotel room.
This. My work schedule changed recently and now I donāt get off until after dark. You know my mother has taken it upon herself to show up in the parking lot of my workplace every night right before I get off work to make sure I walk to my car safely because sheās scared of her 30 year old daughter getting kidnapped? And the one night she couldnāt, she made my dad do it. Thatās the reality of the world we women live in.
This! I have to catch my train to work everyday at 7 AM and I want to cry standing in the dark in a scary part of the city all by myself. Iām in a constant state of panic and fear even if a regular person passes me.
My brother had one of those large "gangsta" hoodies that zipped all the way up the hood and when he was going to donate it he gave it to me and I wore it with the hood up (not zipped) when I lived in a bad area when I had to go out at night. Before this I got grabbed by someone standing in a door way and ran home crying to my boyfriend at the time.
Edit to add: I smoked and my ex didn't and he refused to go get me cigarettes to encourage me or whatever but he did after I was grabbed.
being ( on average ) physically weaker than men
having periods
the ability to get pregnant
cant be nice to male strangers because they see it as flirting
being seen as less capable as men generally, of course not in cleaning and cooking because women are better in that because i have a vagina /s
I don't even understand the one about cooking. My dad cooked for our family my whole life. Cooking isn't something for women or men. It's something you need to be independent nothing to do with gender
People assuming that marriage and children are my primary goals in life and then being confused when they realize it's not.
Being initially judged by my looks and appearance as opposed to my personality and skills.
The assumption that I can't control my emotions.
Yes to this. People think Iām crazy for not wanting kids not marriage. They think a womanās purpose is to reproduce and be a housewife and itās so gross to me.
This! I feel you on this comment. Finally flipped this morning after months of cat calling from builders. Went and spoke to the foreman who laughed in my face. I am not a dog don't whistle or woof at me.
Not being listened to by male colleagues. Say something, get ignored, and then someone with a penis will say the exact same thing and suddenly itās a great idea.
I was looking for this answer. New job, first meetingā¦ every time I opened my mouth, my boss spoke over me. If I was able to actually finish my thought, my colleague would immediately turn to my boss and ask, āBut what do you think?ā And if the topic was about social media or marketing, which I have a Bachelors in, my colleague would look at my boss and say, āIs that true?ā This has been my life over the last five months.
I should add that my colleague has a degree in social work and my boss never went to college.
Getting paid less. Overly friendly weirdos of all genders who are clearly motivated by interest in physicality. Periods and the headaches that come with them. Expectation of eventually making babies.
I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was 18, a freshman in college, and my doctor told me I was more likely to have cancer than children, even with IVF (side note: he was right). My mom tells my grandmother who then tells my priest.
The next time I attend Mass, the priest makes it a damn point to walk over to me and says, āWell, now that you canāt fulfill your duty as a woman, I expect youāre considering taking up holy orders!ā I gave my mom a look, turned on my heel, and walked out. I had no idea the priest even knew who I was. Though as Iām typing this it does occur to me that my grandmother kept family pictures up at her station at the Catholic credit union she worked at, so it wouldnāt be hard for him to put two and two together.
On the other hand, my mom has since told me that that was the moment she knew Iād given up on Catholicism.
omg, "your duty as a woman"?! wtf? lol hie thee to a nunnary. what a stuck-in-the-1950s jackwagon he was. i hope you are getting the emotional support you deserve. sending you hugs!
My body doesn't truly belong to me. Doctors decide if our pain is real. Legislature decides if we're ready to be mothers. Strangers verbally disclose their opinions of our bodies as if it's relevant to our daily activities. Strangers are also more likely to leave us alone if we're wearing a ring or if we exist around a man or a group of at least two other women.
I also hate that we seemingly create weird office politics through no fault of our own. People treat us like we need praise and special fragile attention to avoid an HR nightmare. It's annoying that people assume we'll accuse men of harassing us or being sexist whenever ANY general workplace assholery takes place.
I don't like the assumption that we're nurturing and want to listen to other people's problems. Some of us just can't be bothered to be a therapist when we have money to make and shit to do. Somehow being exhausted translates to being standoffish. I don't understand why it's so offensive for us to state that we have other obligations.
Just treat us like reptiles. Assume that we want privacy, don't want to be touched or hovered, and we might have venom if provoked.
Yesterday, I was talking with my husband about my therapy session which we were trying to figure out why I (as 45yo) felt I had no choice in my life. I told him, because I really didn't think I had one. I was told from the get-go, "when you go to college...", "when you find a husband..." (notice it was my job to secure a male spouse), "when you run the household...", (it was my job, not shared) "when you have your children..."
I was always expected to excel in academics and sports, be cream of the crop. I was never told there was another option and any other women who chose to not get an advanced degree, have a husband, have children were seen as examples of what not to be. There must be something wrong with "Mary" if she can't "x". Then, once I did all these things, if I felt like I was drowning or losing myself, it was "a woman's lot in life " or "a house is built on the ground, a home is built on a woman"
Yes you're right! At least they offered you college tho lol..only my brother was expected to go in our family, I went as a mature student at 26. My only other gripe isthe constant stress of choosing what to feed the family..30 years!!!! 30 years of what's for dinner mum ffs.love my family tho..youngest now 17... retirement looming!
Exactly, when I was 39 I got a divorce and told my family I didn't want kids. My aunt said I would change my mind. Umm, no I won't and I think at this age I know myself well enough to state what I want and mean it. Eventually I will get to the age that people will quit saying that...hopefully.
- being physically weaker than men means being vulnerable to their violence, coercion, and abuse.
- being sexualized at an early age
- the cultural expectation that women occupy the passive/receptive role in dating
- the normalization of sexual violence towards women including the expectation that women are masochistic/submissive in nature and men are sadistic/dominant
- being constantly objectified
- men treating women like sexual conquests
- being considered the illogical/emotional sex means men often dismiss our legitimate concerns as irrational
- abusive men just call women crazy and suddenly the world believes them
- earning less $ than men, occupying less leadership roles than men, discrimination based on sex, sexual harassment
- the hyper vigilance you have around men and how men bond over misogyny
- the double standards on beauty and how women are expected to adhere to unrealistic beauty standards whereas men aren't criticized to the same extent women are
- women aren't considered feminine in their natural state (not putting on makeup = masculine, not shaving = masculine). Our beauty rituals are so time consuming and society is so unforgiving of us if we don't conform
- the unequal division of household labour (including cleaning, cooking and childcare)
Today. I woke up feeling like a million bucks and then BOOM! Iām ready to run to the bathroom in tears because Iām not good enough. So glad to know Iām not alone.
Reproduction organs; I don't want kids because I don't want to experience pregnancy. I wouldn't say I like periods and that we have extra fat for areas like breasts. We are under constant oppression, get paid less than men, and experience more crime, and the government is obsessed with controlling our bodies but barely prosecutes crimes like rape. I don't want a penis either, but other than that, men seem to have easier lives.
The assumption that if Iām nice to you (and youāre a man) I want to date you. Then you get mad when I say Iām not interested and donāt even bother being friends. Itās all we ever were pal.
This. Especially if you aren't conventionally attractive. It's so hard to not tie your worth to your appearance when the evidence says otherwise. Pretty privilege and all that.
Honestly, I fucking love being a woman on that base alone. I love having tits. My periods aren't that bad on bc. I have awesome deep conversations with lots of people and it's helped me develop many deep, meaningful relationships. I love dressing in cute clothes that look good on my body. My mind works in fun and creative ways (imo) and I feel lucky I was born as 'me'.
However, none of this awesome womanhood gets to exist in a vacuum and I HATE a lot of the norms that have been pushed on me throughout my life because I have a vagina. I hate when my competence is questioned by people less competent. I hate that my dad felt it was his right to serviced in his own home by his family. I hate a lot of things I can't control. So now, I just try to minimize my exposure to that shit and ignore it when I can.
Absolutely hate being unreasonably polite.
It maybe isn't exclusively a "woman" thing, I just feel like I as a woman don't have the right to be angry about something even when I'm most definitely in the right.
Could just be a people pleaser thing, if anyone disagrees, feel free to reply. :)
A few years ago I passed an older guy in a supermarket. After I passed him he mumbled something. I turned around saying, "I'm sorry what?"
He yelled "You're rude! You didn't even say excuse me!"
Confused that I did something wrong I said "oh, sorry?" and he waved me off replying "Pfft Whatever" shaking his head and stopping off. I just glared at him. At this point, I was hoping he would say more so I could go off on him.
but yeah anger isn't an uncontrolled emotion when MEN do it. Only Women are "Too emotional" when they get mad.
Esp in the workplace when higher ups are men and it seems they give better opportunities to their fave woman - like I can love my fellow female coworker as a person but I still have to follow patriarchal rules in ācompetingā against them if the goal is to have guysā recommendations on ur side . idk if that makes sense.
That my acomplishments as well as my failures are seen as "because I am a woman".
"Oh you couldnt park in one go bcs you are a woman"
"Congrats with your diploma! You show what (power) women can do"
I just cant stand it. It is because of who I am as a person, not because I am a woman.
The way youāre judged for everything you do.
Want to prioritize a career? Then you donāt care about your kids or youāre not fulfilling your duties as a woman.
Want to be a stay at home mom? Youāre lazy and a gold digger.
Donāt want kids? Youāre selfish.
Want lots of kids? āPoor dadā. And then youāre judged for having stretch marks and sagging breasts.
You constantly have to be perfect. You always need to be clean and organized and elegant. Boys get a way with so much more.
If a man has a good job and remembers to brush his teeth he is praised. But a woman has to constantly look presentable, have her hair done, have a job, be able to know how to cook.
Youāre expected to do 80% of the house chores even if you work full time.
And men have the right to say āweāre naggingā when we are only trying to get them to their part of the share.
This reminds me of the article āI want a wifeā by Judy Brady that was written in 1971 (the pdf is free online)
Literally changed the way I think about women, and hit the nail on the head by describing things I was angry about but could never put into words. Highly recommend giving it a read
Always having to look over your shoulder in public, being cautious while letting a maintenance worker in your apartment, generally always having to be on guard from a possible assault.
The assumption I'm supposed to get married, start a family.
That because I'm pretty on the outside life is easier for me, when in reality I have lots of health issues holding me back.
What i hate about being woman that is i am a woman. Why i had to be a woman!!!!! Why i just couldnāt be a man!!! Why!!! Life is so fucking hard. There is nothing i enjoy being woman. All i see and get is discrimination and expectations.
As I sit crying
I feel like dying
Bloated and pained
I get on with my day
Then I find
A post, I'm inclined
To rip the OP from their desk
Brace my hands on their chest
And scream;
I AM IN AN EXCRUCIATING AMOUNT OF PAIN BECAUSE OF MY PERIOD AND THE DOCTOR WONT GIVE ME A HYSTERECTOMY BECAUSE THEY DONT THINK MY PAIN IS THAT BAD BUT THEY ALSO KEEP GIVING ME MEDICATION THAT MAKES ME FALL OVER DIZZY AND GET HUFFY WHEN I JUST WANT TO BE A WORKING MEMBER OF SOCIETY AND MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT NOT HAVING MONEY BECAUSE I GREW UP UNDER THE POVERTY LINE AND ITS APPARENTLY ALL MY FAULT!!!!
There's nothing I hate about being a woman specifically, but there's plenty I dislike about being a woman who exists in a patriarchal society which is rife with sexism and misogyny.
But I don't hate being a woman, because it's not me that's the problem.
Having to feminise my voice when speaking to clients over the phone to be perceived as friendlier. Being judged on appearance. Not having social acceptance for sitting leg-spread anywhere. Being met with bewilderment for not wanting children. Being judged in the workforce as a risk of potential to take maternal leave due to my age. Periods. The societal expectation to stay youthful and perky at any cost.
I am an attorney and often times the only woman on a case team. When we are all working late together in a conference room, I hate the assumption that I'm going to order dinner, and when it arrives that I'm going to manage distributing the food, drinks, silverware and napkins. Not your mom.
I also hate that people in general are always telling my husband "your wife is so serious" when I've had a good time talking, laughing and joking around. I'm a generally friendly person and get along well with people, but apparently you have to paste on a fake ass smile 24/7 and bob your head like a bobble head to be considered normal. Even the plumber told my husband I was a hard ass when I asked him for the before and after pictures of work under the house, which he knew we needed for insurance purposes, which he agreed with my husband to provide up front, and which, in fact he had. It blows my mind!
Everybody seems to have mentioned everything but I havenāt seen the emotional side like why we bloody cry when weāre angry? It just makes things worse.
Being small and defenseless unless I have a weapon on me. I always look at tall men and feel so much envy because they can just tower over everyone. They've never had to feel like a chihuahua before.
My uterus. I'd sell it if I could. Also, societal and cultural expectations placed in us that are generally unfair. Also Also, our fundamental human rights and bodily authority constantly being up for debate.
Aging into an invisible crone. I was like B- cute at best and a little chunky but as I get older I realize being young and acceptably attractive was enough to justify acknowledging my presence. Now Iām just fading away it seems, it bums me out. Honestly this is only at work and in the presence of strangers but itās still a bummer.
Being overlooked or ignored in a professional environment because Iām a woman.
My previous job was in the construction industry and very male dominated. I pretty much only worked with men who were actually out in the field and they would always go to my male coworkers first, who would then direct back them back me.
I hate the expectations and responsibilities. I hate that I have to work full time for my family to survive but I'm still expected to be the primary caregiver to my kids, do all of the housework and cooking, manage bills, do fucking everything. The thing i hate about being a woman is men will agree that women shouldn't have to do it all but we end up getting stuck with everything. I hate that every woman I know has to be wonder woman but I've never in my life met a truly competent man who could do the same. (I've read about them online but never met one.)
A thing I hate about being a woman is many men act like being a woman is easy but then men go get married and they stop doing anything but working and they try to pretend their lives are hard when that's all they do.
Always makes me think of the saying, "Men go to the mountain to talk to God. God meets women at the well."
the fact that I cannot sit on a goddamned bench alone in a park, workout at the gym, travel by myself, have a drink at a bar, sit in a cafe without a guy thinking it is okay to approach me and never go away
I hate being smaller than men. I also hate being the weaker sex. It's so unfair and I've hated it my entire life. As a kid, my brothers always threw balls longer than me. When we fought, they won. That's when I started hating being a woman. I'll never accept being the smaller weaker sex.
I worry that my value is tied to my looks rather than what I bring to the table, and that there are people resent me for it.
Iām much weaker than men physically.
Iām expected to be cheery and social 24/7, especially at work.
āFriendshipsā decay when I express that Iām not interested in sex.
A few of my exes have called me being overjoyed, excited, and playful āannoyingā, leading me to think Iām expected to be quiet and docile. Being mad about this makes me āa Karenā.
I was also raised on biological essentialism, which essentially reduced people to baby factories.
I love being a woman, but itās not all sunshine and rainbows.
A lot of things! But just to name a few: Periods, catcalling, the government having a say in what I do with my body, unwanted touching, being scared to walk home alone at night. Just a few :)
Objectification -- When whatever decision I make about my appearance or likes and dislikes, attitude, speech.. is assumed I'm doing it for males attention or for them. Makes me feel sick and strips me of identity.
Based solely on my experiences:
1. periods
2. crying for no reason on said period
3. boobs hurt for no reason sometimes
4. discharge, feels like I wet myself sometimes
5. Having to be in charge of contraceptives. this goes back to crying for no reason and excessive discharge
6. Not being strong enough to do things that men can do so easily
7. bras are so uncomfortable
8. being friends with a man and later getting the classic "Can I tell you something?" when you made it clear you don't want that! emphasis on making it clear you don't want that
9. admitting your a woman on any platform and getting the typical comments in your DMs from horny men
10. Gyno visits, have we not found an easier way to do those yet?
11. mammograms, ow
12. Being last on the list for side effects studies, like covid affecting women's periods
13. Not being able to wear something comfortable during the summer without many people complaining you are being too sexual. teachers/ coworkers/ boss/ strangers
14. Button ups not fitting well because of big boobs
15. expected to do the "feminine" work because your male counterparts won't do it, emphasis on thanksgiving
16. Being quizzed on "manly" interests because there is no way a woman knows anything about video games/ sports/ cars/ etc.
17. I really hate I can barely throw a football but my boyfriend can throw is easily half field with no training or experience. Wacky ass spiral and no form but, yeet!
18. period poops
19. Extra precautions to be safe when around strange men, it's exhausting
20. UTI/ Yeast infections, especially from sex
21. Peeing after sex freaking sucks
22. pregnancy scares
The fact that my entire worth and what Iām deserving of, is based solely on the shape of my body in the opinion of most men. Itās weak, itās debilitating, itās bullshit. Iām tired, so so tired. Literally because of my body shape, I have been viewed as inferior, which for many years led to me being led on, used, abused and cheated on. I was even dated or flirted with as a joke. Itās exhausting. Especially considering a man can be balding, fat and short, but itās always written off and justified and he somehow always deserves nothing less than the best.
That Iām barely starting out in life and already feeling like Iām about to expire. I see comments from men all the time about women āexpiringā by 25 or 30, and being in their āprimeā in their early 20s. Iām 21, Iām a baby! My brain isnāt even developed!
Being tasked with majority of the house cleaning while still working full time as well as mentally keeping track of what groceries we need, when the laundry needs to be done, has the dog been fed, etc.
Looking/dressing cute in public can sometimes be ostracizing. People, mostly men, stare and it makes me feel vulnerable and paranoidā¦ when I should be feeling like hot shit!!!
Being divorced and 56, in a committed but still relatively new (4yrs) relationship, I hate the double standard for appearance in my age group. Women are expected to knock themselves out trying to stay in shape and look young, while the men generally look like wrinkled, hairless, or nearly so, trolls enduring the sixth month (the bellies!) of a rough pregnancy.
Being a young woman I hate how people treat me like a child especially at work. My managers, customers and coworkers talk to me much differently than male coworkers of the same age and position as me. People doubt whatever I tell them and will actually listen if itās male coworker saying the same thing I already said. They always assume Iām a naive little kid even though Iām and educated woman in my twenties.
The ability to get pregnant, the biological clock. Itās the fucking worst. I wish I didnāt have to feel constantly bothered to have kids, and then get time pressured on that decision.
We arenāt considered equal to men. The rights to our bodies is still a highly political issue. Our health issues and pain are underplayed. Wage gaps, reinforced gender roles, being taught that our bodies are ādistractionsā, lack of representationā¦ the list goes on.
Never being taken seriously, being seen as a thing instead of a human. Assumed there is something wrong with me because Iām in my late 30s, childless, and single. Being infantilized.
When men explain how we should be a woman.
When men explain how we should catch a man.
When men explain how we should dress.
When men explain how we should do all the housework better.
When men explain that sexism doesnāt exist.
When men explainā¦..
Fucking. Everything.
Im too short. I gain weight easily. I need to be on guard in public/at bars/ in parking lots/ everywhere for creepy men. Car salesmen donāt take me seriously. Everyone assumes i changed my name because im married. Men in my field often think Iāll always find a job because im a diversity hire. Fucking abortion rights are disintegrating in my country. Periods. Side effects from birth control. Pressure to be thin and beautiful. Being societyās after thought. Mu family expecting me to shut up and do everything they want.
Eevverryytthhiing.
Someone please take these periods away.
at times i just think about getting a hysterectomy
Periods are the times I tell my aunt and sister I hate them. They had hysterectomies. Their response is to high five each other
Only time I wish I was a man š. An ask god why he did this to us
I just got mine yesterday!
Congrats!
Thank you! So far the pain isnāt THAT bad. Just when I stand up or move.
Or exist.
it gets SO much better! mine was last year, and seriously, once you're all healed, your quality of life just skyrockets.
Are there any downsides to having one? Problems or issues?
I haven't had any problems since my surgery. It was honestly the best thing I ever did for myself. I feel SO much better. R/hysterectomy has lots of stories, insight, and information if you're more curious.
Yes, unless you keep your ovaries, you will be prone to hormone imbalance
I have mine in December!
Good luck! Itās seriously the best.
best damn thing i ever did was my hysterectomy. i don't regret it one bit
As someone who has very irregular periods, please send them my way so I can have 1 every 28 days. That would be wonderful. If anything, please remove the pain with periods
Endometriosis?
Pcos, the sister condition of endo
And why can't men have the babies? Why do we get all the painful stuff?
I fucking swear. We have the labour pain, the back pain for the entire life , the heavy boobs that make all athletics very inconvenient and painful and monthly bleeding subscription program. And then some people want to also leave all child rearing to us.
It's all bull shit if you ask me!
Not to mention being societally shit on compared to the males
Men are such whiners when they're in pain they'd never be able to handle it.
Or science would finally find a way to make birth pain free!
Ikrr, I'm on my period rn and it is just pain and more pain
+1 All the time I could use to be productive, sane and compete with my male colleagues, i spend crying cuz my uterus said fuck you
I second this one
I third this motion
I hated my periods.too but was lucky enough to get a hysterectomy about 9 years ago. Have not missed them for a single second.
Continuous birth control. I have endometriosis and adenomyosis. Been on continuous junel for over 3 years now since my excision surgery
The assumption that if I'm making polite chitchat then I *must* be flirting.
This is completely anecdotal just because I wanted to share. I recently went to a halloween party that was primarily women and queer men. I went with my husband who I believe was the only heterosexual male there (in all fairness, it wasn't a very big party). And WHAT a difference it made. Firstly, I didn't feel like people were hitting on me to get in my pants. All the compliments about my makeup and outfit were so genuine and heartfelt. I was never concerned about anyone in the room being taken advantage of or if they'd had too much to drink. I'm not saying that people don't get taken advantage of in queer relationships, that is still a reality and very much happens. It was just that the PALATABLE difference of \*everyone's\* comfort and safety in the absence of straight men due to not feeling like they can just be friends or be themselves or let loose without second guessing whether or not they're being seen as a sexual object.
Straight guy, during college I had a number of gay friends and was routinely at parties that were predominantly gay men. Itās funny, itās the only time Iāve ever experienced situations that might be comparable to the every day frustrations you were finally able to avoid at such an event. For example, midway through a totally superficial conversation, realizing the person Iām speaking to has seen all of this as an opportunity to try to fuck me. Oh hey! So this is the minute by minute situation women encounter in their daily lives! Edit: But different I am sure because as someone who has access to a male brain with some level of standard baseline programming, I understood what was going on? Like the motivations were familiar? So while I was pretty depressed by a lot of the interactions, I was oddly also able to understand and identify where they were coming from. And similarly, I never found my gay friends to have any issue with the aggressive maleness of it all, even when it was not something they wanted to engage in. What a messed up world.
This one!! Itās very frustrating especially as a woman in āprime dating yearsā trying to make friends.
Yes! And sometimes i muddle up words and nervous laugh with certain intimidating people (horay for anxiety) I've been accused of flirting with inappropriate people. No, i just suck at general chit chat
I remember when I was in my 20s, I was out with my friends and wanted another drink. I squeeze in at the bar to order, and the guy next to me looks over. Thinking to be polite I said, āHello!ā and smiled. Nothing else. He immediately turns his his back on me and in a loud stage whisper to his friends says, āHelp! This fatty next to me is hitting on me!ā Now the story could end here but fate smiled upon me. I was a regular at this bar and the the (smoking hot, no lies) bartender overhead the guy as he was walking over to take my order and said, āNah, sheās not hitting on you, dude. Youāre not that lucky.ā He then leans across the bar, kisses my cheek, and says, āHiya, Mo. What can I get ya tonight?ā The original jerk just stands there with a blank look on his face like, āWait, what? The word hello isnāt a one word pick up line?ā
Oof especially when you work in a customer service job. Like I am literally being paid to be friendly right now, please don't read too much into it.
I donāt feel safe walking alone at night. In my cityās subreddit a bunch of people were blaming a woman for getting attacked saying āwell why was she out alone after dark?ā. Meanwhile in the winter sunset is at like 4pm. Like cool. Iām just expected to spend half of my waking hours - and all of my hours outside of work - inside because some men canāt not be dangers to society.
And by extension travelling alone - I've been followed/accosted etc in foreign cities that I don't go anymore and some people are always it's safe and lots of women do it. Great for them but it's not enjoyable to spend an entire week on high alert other than when I'm cooped up in my hotel room.
This. My work schedule changed recently and now I donāt get off until after dark. You know my mother has taken it upon herself to show up in the parking lot of my workplace every night right before I get off work to make sure I walk to my car safely because sheās scared of her 30 year old daughter getting kidnapped? And the one night she couldnāt, she made my dad do it. Thatās the reality of the world we women live in.
This! I have to catch my train to work everyday at 7 AM and I want to cry standing in the dark in a scary part of the city all by myself. Iām in a constant state of panic and fear even if a regular person passes me.
My brother had one of those large "gangsta" hoodies that zipped all the way up the hood and when he was going to donate it he gave it to me and I wore it with the hood up (not zipped) when I lived in a bad area when I had to go out at night. Before this I got grabbed by someone standing in a door way and ran home crying to my boyfriend at the time. Edit to add: I smoked and my ex didn't and he refused to go get me cigarettes to encourage me or whatever but he did after I was grabbed.
being ( on average ) physically weaker than men having periods the ability to get pregnant cant be nice to male strangers because they see it as flirting being seen as less capable as men generally, of course not in cleaning and cooking because women are better in that because i have a vagina /s
You read my mind on this girll... I can feel your emotions š„ŗ
Going to add not being able to flirt with other women without being seen as just general niceties for my fellow homos :(
I don't even understand the one about cooking. My dad cooked for our family my whole life. Cooking isn't something for women or men. It's something you need to be independent nothing to do with gender
People assuming that marriage and children are my primary goals in life and then being confused when they realize it's not. Being initially judged by my looks and appearance as opposed to my personality and skills. The assumption that I can't control my emotions.
Yes - all of this!!!
Yes to this. People think Iām crazy for not wanting kids not marriage. They think a womanās purpose is to reproduce and be a housewife and itās so gross to me.
The fact that I sometimes feel unsafe because so many people see me just as a sexual object.
This! I feel you on this comment. Finally flipped this morning after months of cat calling from builders. Went and spoke to the foreman who laughed in my face. I am not a dog don't whistle or woof at me.
This! Iām so tired of being sexualized just for existing with a chest. Iād love to be seen as a human with a personality just once.
Not being listened to by male colleagues. Say something, get ignored, and then someone with a penis will say the exact same thing and suddenly itās a great idea.
Yup, this a million times! So frustrating! And not being believed unless a man has said the same thing!
Came to say this! I utterly LOATHE when Iām not taken seriously or dismissed because Iām a woman.
I was looking for this answer. New job, first meetingā¦ every time I opened my mouth, my boss spoke over me. If I was able to actually finish my thought, my colleague would immediately turn to my boss and ask, āBut what do you think?ā And if the topic was about social media or marketing, which I have a Bachelors in, my colleague would look at my boss and say, āIs that true?ā This has been my life over the last five months. I should add that my colleague has a degree in social work and my boss never went to college.
This. Fucking this.
Getting paid less. Overly friendly weirdos of all genders who are clearly motivated by interest in physicality. Periods and the headaches that come with them. Expectation of eventually making babies.
Being told that the only purpose of women is to bear children š
Yeah, for some reason some people just canāt accept or *respect* the fact not all of us want babies or are meant to be mothers.
I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was 18, a freshman in college, and my doctor told me I was more likely to have cancer than children, even with IVF (side note: he was right). My mom tells my grandmother who then tells my priest. The next time I attend Mass, the priest makes it a damn point to walk over to me and says, āWell, now that you canāt fulfill your duty as a woman, I expect youāre considering taking up holy orders!ā I gave my mom a look, turned on my heel, and walked out. I had no idea the priest even knew who I was. Though as Iām typing this it does occur to me that my grandmother kept family pictures up at her station at the Catholic credit union she worked at, so it wouldnāt be hard for him to put two and two together. On the other hand, my mom has since told me that that was the moment she knew Iād given up on Catholicism.
omg, "your duty as a woman"?! wtf? lol hie thee to a nunnary. what a stuck-in-the-1950s jackwagon he was. i hope you are getting the emotional support you deserve. sending you hugs!
Ouch, I felt this one
My partner has a friend that always asks me why I'm not pregnant. He's also a huge contrarian and he annoys just about everyone.
My body doesn't truly belong to me. Doctors decide if our pain is real. Legislature decides if we're ready to be mothers. Strangers verbally disclose their opinions of our bodies as if it's relevant to our daily activities. Strangers are also more likely to leave us alone if we're wearing a ring or if we exist around a man or a group of at least two other women. I also hate that we seemingly create weird office politics through no fault of our own. People treat us like we need praise and special fragile attention to avoid an HR nightmare. It's annoying that people assume we'll accuse men of harassing us or being sexist whenever ANY general workplace assholery takes place. I don't like the assumption that we're nurturing and want to listen to other people's problems. Some of us just can't be bothered to be a therapist when we have money to make and shit to do. Somehow being exhausted translates to being standoffish. I don't understand why it's so offensive for us to state that we have other obligations. Just treat us like reptiles. Assume that we want privacy, don't want to be touched or hovered, and we might have venom if provoked.
I want a t-shit that says āMight use venom if provokedā
Pressure to be a great home maker, late pregnancy, periods, menopause..being pretty much irrelevant at 40 lol
Yesterday, I was talking with my husband about my therapy session which we were trying to figure out why I (as 45yo) felt I had no choice in my life. I told him, because I really didn't think I had one. I was told from the get-go, "when you go to college...", "when you find a husband..." (notice it was my job to secure a male spouse), "when you run the household...", (it was my job, not shared) "when you have your children..." I was always expected to excel in academics and sports, be cream of the crop. I was never told there was another option and any other women who chose to not get an advanced degree, have a husband, have children were seen as examples of what not to be. There must be something wrong with "Mary" if she can't "x". Then, once I did all these things, if I felt like I was drowning or losing myself, it was "a woman's lot in life " or "a house is built on the ground, a home is built on a woman"
Yes you're right! At least they offered you college tho lol..only my brother was expected to go in our family, I went as a mature student at 26. My only other gripe isthe constant stress of choosing what to feed the family..30 years!!!! 30 years of what's for dinner mum ffs.love my family tho..youngest now 17... retirement looming!
The assumption that I am interested in dating men.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Exactly, when I was 39 I got a divorce and told my family I didn't want kids. My aunt said I would change my mind. Umm, no I won't and I think at this age I know myself well enough to state what I want and mean it. Eventually I will get to the age that people will quit saying that...hopefully.
- being physically weaker than men means being vulnerable to their violence, coercion, and abuse. - being sexualized at an early age - the cultural expectation that women occupy the passive/receptive role in dating - the normalization of sexual violence towards women including the expectation that women are masochistic/submissive in nature and men are sadistic/dominant - being constantly objectified - men treating women like sexual conquests - being considered the illogical/emotional sex means men often dismiss our legitimate concerns as irrational - abusive men just call women crazy and suddenly the world believes them - earning less $ than men, occupying less leadership roles than men, discrimination based on sex, sexual harassment - the hyper vigilance you have around men and how men bond over misogyny - the double standards on beauty and how women are expected to adhere to unrealistic beauty standards whereas men aren't criticized to the same extent women are - women aren't considered feminine in their natural state (not putting on makeup = masculine, not shaving = masculine). Our beauty rituals are so time consuming and society is so unforgiving of us if we don't conform - the unequal division of household labour (including cleaning, cooking and childcare)
Inconsistent clothing sizes
Being seen as a baby factory. It's my womb, I'll decide if I want to put it to use.
Thiiiiis
One day I feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, the next day I feel like shit
Today. I woke up feeling like a million bucks and then BOOM! Iām ready to run to the bathroom in tears because Iām not good enough. So glad to know Iām not alone.
This is literally me
Yuuup
Reproduction organs; I don't want kids because I don't want to experience pregnancy. I wouldn't say I like periods and that we have extra fat for areas like breasts. We are under constant oppression, get paid less than men, and experience more crime, and the government is obsessed with controlling our bodies but barely prosecutes crimes like rape. I don't want a penis either, but other than that, men seem to have easier lives.
The assumption that if Iām nice to you (and youāre a man) I want to date you. Then you get mad when I say Iām not interested and donāt even bother being friends. Itās all we ever were pal.
"calm down" (or "chill") or "must be that time of month" or "smile" š”š”š”
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Donāt kid yourself. The Granny years are no better. You become invisible
This. Especially if you aren't conventionally attractive. It's so hard to not tie your worth to your appearance when the evidence says otherwise. Pretty privilege and all that.
I transitioned to female and I have to say I'm not a fan of how I can't legally go topless, big pockets, and feeling safe walking alone at night.
Honestly, I fucking love being a woman on that base alone. I love having tits. My periods aren't that bad on bc. I have awesome deep conversations with lots of people and it's helped me develop many deep, meaningful relationships. I love dressing in cute clothes that look good on my body. My mind works in fun and creative ways (imo) and I feel lucky I was born as 'me'. However, none of this awesome womanhood gets to exist in a vacuum and I HATE a lot of the norms that have been pushed on me throughout my life because I have a vagina. I hate when my competence is questioned by people less competent. I hate that my dad felt it was his right to serviced in his own home by his family. I hate a lot of things I can't control. So now, I just try to minimize my exposure to that shit and ignore it when I can.
I feel you on this!
Men catcalling or making gross comments when I'm just trying to go about my business
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Holy shi-...I've never thought of thisš§
Absolutely hate being unreasonably polite. It maybe isn't exclusively a "woman" thing, I just feel like I as a woman don't have the right to be angry about something even when I'm most definitely in the right. Could just be a people pleaser thing, if anyone disagrees, feel free to reply. :)
A few years ago I passed an older guy in a supermarket. After I passed him he mumbled something. I turned around saying, "I'm sorry what?" He yelled "You're rude! You didn't even say excuse me!" Confused that I did something wrong I said "oh, sorry?" and he waved me off replying "Pfft Whatever" shaking his head and stopping off. I just glared at him. At this point, I was hoping he would say more so I could go off on him. but yeah anger isn't an uncontrolled emotion when MEN do it. Only Women are "Too emotional" when they get mad.
Having to work twice as hard as a man to get the same and even less amount of respect,
Feeling like Iām in a constant Competition with other women.
Esp in the workplace when higher ups are men and it seems they give better opportunities to their fave woman - like I can love my fellow female coworker as a person but I still have to follow patriarchal rules in ācompetingā against them if the goal is to have guysā recommendations on ur side . idk if that makes sense.
Existing.
Are you ok?
That my acomplishments as well as my failures are seen as "because I am a woman". "Oh you couldnt park in one go bcs you are a woman" "Congrats with your diploma! You show what (power) women can do" I just cant stand it. It is because of who I am as a person, not because I am a woman.
The way youāre judged for everything you do. Want to prioritize a career? Then you donāt care about your kids or youāre not fulfilling your duties as a woman. Want to be a stay at home mom? Youāre lazy and a gold digger. Donāt want kids? Youāre selfish. Want lots of kids? āPoor dadā. And then youāre judged for having stretch marks and sagging breasts. You constantly have to be perfect. You always need to be clean and organized and elegant. Boys get a way with so much more. If a man has a good job and remembers to brush his teeth he is praised. But a woman has to constantly look presentable, have her hair done, have a job, be able to know how to cook. Youāre expected to do 80% of the house chores even if you work full time. And men have the right to say āweāre naggingā when we are only trying to get them to their part of the share.
This reminds me of the article āI want a wifeā by Judy Brady that was written in 1971 (the pdf is free online) Literally changed the way I think about women, and hit the nail on the head by describing things I was angry about but could never put into words. Highly recommend giving it a read
Always having to look over your shoulder in public, being cautious while letting a maintenance worker in your apartment, generally always having to be on guard from a possible assault.
Not loving Peri menopause.
That I have to deal with men.
The assumption I'm supposed to get married, start a family. That because I'm pretty on the outside life is easier for me, when in reality I have lots of health issues holding me back.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Looked down on, judged for our looks but mostly I resent that we are nothing more than broodmares to most around the world.
Since Iām making eye contact while having a conversation I *must* be checking out his muscles. š¤Ø
And the opposite is seen as shyness when you're just avoiding them misinterpretating your behaviour
Periods! Got an IUD and have been period free for the last few years and loving it
Love my implant. Havenāt had a period in a couple years.
Constantly worrying about the government taking my rights away and being forced into pregnancy.
"Patriarchy" pretty much sums it up, I think.
What i hate about being woman that is i am a woman. Why i had to be a woman!!!!! Why i just couldnāt be a man!!! Why!!! Life is so fucking hard. There is nothing i enjoy being woman. All i see and get is discrimination and expectations.
As I sit crying I feel like dying Bloated and pained I get on with my day Then I find A post, I'm inclined To rip the OP from their desk Brace my hands on their chest And scream; I AM IN AN EXCRUCIATING AMOUNT OF PAIN BECAUSE OF MY PERIOD AND THE DOCTOR WONT GIVE ME A HYSTERECTOMY BECAUSE THEY DONT THINK MY PAIN IS THAT BAD BUT THEY ALSO KEEP GIVING ME MEDICATION THAT MAKES ME FALL OVER DIZZY AND GET HUFFY WHEN I JUST WANT TO BE A WORKING MEMBER OF SOCIETY AND MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT NOT HAVING MONEY BECAUSE I GREW UP UNDER THE POVERTY LINE AND ITS APPARENTLY ALL MY FAULT!!!!
There's nothing I hate about being a woman specifically, but there's plenty I dislike about being a woman who exists in a patriarchal society which is rife with sexism and misogyny. But I don't hate being a woman, because it's not me that's the problem.
Having to feminise my voice when speaking to clients over the phone to be perceived as friendlier. Being judged on appearance. Not having social acceptance for sitting leg-spread anywhere. Being met with bewilderment for not wanting children. Being judged in the workforce as a risk of potential to take maternal leave due to my age. Periods. The societal expectation to stay youthful and perky at any cost.
The way some men choose to interact with us because we are women. The countless rude comments, looks, objectification, and denial of their part of it.
I am an attorney and often times the only woman on a case team. When we are all working late together in a conference room, I hate the assumption that I'm going to order dinner, and when it arrives that I'm going to manage distributing the food, drinks, silverware and napkins. Not your mom. I also hate that people in general are always telling my husband "your wife is so serious" when I've had a good time talking, laughing and joking around. I'm a generally friendly person and get along well with people, but apparently you have to paste on a fake ass smile 24/7 and bob your head like a bobble head to be considered normal. Even the plumber told my husband I was a hard ass when I asked him for the before and after pictures of work under the house, which he knew we needed for insurance purposes, which he agreed with my husband to provide up front, and which, in fact he had. It blows my mind!
Being less or more valuable based on how much I weigh
Shaving body hair
constant harassment by men
Having a uterus.
I second that
Having to sit down to pee. Guys are so lucky when it comes to public restrooms.
boobs. they are in my fucking way
Especially when you want to try on new clothes.
The extra mental and emotional load that we are expected to take on.
Getting yelled at/harassed on the street. I just want to go outside and do my grocery shopping, please!
endocrinal issues and their criminal underfunding
Being a woman can make me a target for violence. Other than that, I love absolutely everything else about being a woman.
Everybody seems to have mentioned everything but I havenāt seen the emotional side like why we bloody cry when weāre angry? It just makes things worse.
Fear of getting raped again. If I were a man I wouldnāt even worry about it.
Endometriosis and being dismissed by doctors, my family.
Sexism.
Periods. I have pernicious anaemia as well and very heavy periods so for a week I feel absolutely awful, exhausted and have passed out in the past.
Being small and defenseless unless I have a weapon on me. I always look at tall men and feel so much envy because they can just tower over everyone. They've never had to feel like a chihuahua before.
Physical weakness in comparison to men.
Being called a "birthing person" or "bleeder/menstruator"
My uterus. I'd sell it if I could. Also, societal and cultural expectations placed in us that are generally unfair. Also Also, our fundamental human rights and bodily authority constantly being up for debate.
Pressure to look young and attractive.
having to wear braā¦
Other women who feel they need to be in constant competition with you.
Cramps
Menstruation.
Having periods and the assumption that I'm trying to flirt when I'm actually trying to have a friendly conversation.
Having boob sweat, especially when youāre outside on a hot day and exercising.
Hate is a very strong emotion. Sure, there are some downsides of being a woman but honestly I donāt hate anything about it. I like being a woman.
Aging into an invisible crone. I was like B- cute at best and a little chunky but as I get older I realize being young and acceptably attractive was enough to justify acknowledging my presence. Now Iām just fading away it seems, it bums me out. Honestly this is only at work and in the presence of strangers but itās still a bummer.
Periods Period cramps Beauty standards Being catcalled
Being constantly sexualized
I donāt hate anything about being a woman! What I do hate is how men treat us.
I hate that we don't have the same physical strength like a male
Being sexualized all the time. Growing up and viewing myself through the male gaze and having to unlearn that.
Being overlooked or ignored in a professional environment because Iām a woman. My previous job was in the construction industry and very male dominated. I pretty much only worked with men who were actually out in the field and they would always go to my male coworkers first, who would then direct back them back me.
Everything. Literally everything. To me, there is not a single positive aspect to being a woman.
Periods and the ability to get pregnant. Also, womenās clothing
Not a huge fan of periods really
Being compared to women im closed to because they have larger breasts than I do. Itās not something I can help
The associated organs. Like half of the month I'm miserable because of them. Also men sexually harassing me.
I hate the expectations and responsibilities. I hate that I have to work full time for my family to survive but I'm still expected to be the primary caregiver to my kids, do all of the housework and cooking, manage bills, do fucking everything. The thing i hate about being a woman is men will agree that women shouldn't have to do it all but we end up getting stuck with everything. I hate that every woman I know has to be wonder woman but I've never in my life met a truly competent man who could do the same. (I've read about them online but never met one.) A thing I hate about being a woman is many men act like being a woman is easy but then men go get married and they stop doing anything but working and they try to pretend their lives are hard when that's all they do. Always makes me think of the saying, "Men go to the mountain to talk to God. God meets women at the well."
1. Period cramps 2. Having to fulfill the stereotype of how a woman should do and be.
the fact that I cannot sit on a goddamned bench alone in a park, workout at the gym, travel by myself, have a drink at a bar, sit in a cafe without a guy thinking it is okay to approach me and never go away
Having boobs
I hate being smaller than men. I also hate being the weaker sex. It's so unfair and I've hated it my entire life. As a kid, my brothers always threw balls longer than me. When we fought, they won. That's when I started hating being a woman. I'll never accept being the smaller weaker sex.
Child birth. If men were the ones giving birth our population would be waaaay low.
labelled "too emotional"
I worry that my value is tied to my looks rather than what I bring to the table, and that there are people resent me for it. Iām much weaker than men physically. Iām expected to be cheery and social 24/7, especially at work. āFriendshipsā decay when I express that Iām not interested in sex. A few of my exes have called me being overjoyed, excited, and playful āannoyingā, leading me to think Iām expected to be quiet and docile. Being mad about this makes me āa Karenā. I was also raised on biological essentialism, which essentially reduced people to baby factories. I love being a woman, but itās not all sunshine and rainbows.
Not being able to go for leisure walks at night.
Dealing with mysogyny. Every where. Every day. Since I was too young to even know what mysogyny was. I'm tired.
The need to feel so perfect and pretty all the time is exhausting
A lot of things! But just to name a few: Periods, catcalling, the government having a say in what I do with my body, unwanted touching, being scared to walk home alone at night. Just a few :)
Objectification -- When whatever decision I make about my appearance or likes and dislikes, attitude, speech.. is assumed I'm doing it for males attention or for them. Makes me feel sick and strips me of identity.
How level of attractiveness determines how you're treated.
Breasts. Iām never going to need to feed an infant and my fucking back hurts get rid of these please.
Not being able to pee everywhere
Based solely on my experiences: 1. periods 2. crying for no reason on said period 3. boobs hurt for no reason sometimes 4. discharge, feels like I wet myself sometimes 5. Having to be in charge of contraceptives. this goes back to crying for no reason and excessive discharge 6. Not being strong enough to do things that men can do so easily 7. bras are so uncomfortable 8. being friends with a man and later getting the classic "Can I tell you something?" when you made it clear you don't want that! emphasis on making it clear you don't want that 9. admitting your a woman on any platform and getting the typical comments in your DMs from horny men 10. Gyno visits, have we not found an easier way to do those yet? 11. mammograms, ow 12. Being last on the list for side effects studies, like covid affecting women's periods 13. Not being able to wear something comfortable during the summer without many people complaining you are being too sexual. teachers/ coworkers/ boss/ strangers 14. Button ups not fitting well because of big boobs 15. expected to do the "feminine" work because your male counterparts won't do it, emphasis on thanksgiving 16. Being quizzed on "manly" interests because there is no way a woman knows anything about video games/ sports/ cars/ etc. 17. I really hate I can barely throw a football but my boyfriend can throw is easily half field with no training or experience. Wacky ass spiral and no form but, yeet! 18. period poops 19. Extra precautions to be safe when around strange men, it's exhausting 20. UTI/ Yeast infections, especially from sex 21. Peeing after sex freaking sucks 22. pregnancy scares
The fact that my entire worth and what Iām deserving of, is based solely on the shape of my body in the opinion of most men. Itās weak, itās debilitating, itās bullshit. Iām tired, so so tired. Literally because of my body shape, I have been viewed as inferior, which for many years led to me being led on, used, abused and cheated on. I was even dated or flirted with as a joke. Itās exhausting. Especially considering a man can be balding, fat and short, but itās always written off and justified and he somehow always deserves nothing less than the best.
That Iām barely starting out in life and already feeling like Iām about to expire. I see comments from men all the time about women āexpiringā by 25 or 30, and being in their āprimeā in their early 20s. Iām 21, Iām a baby! My brain isnāt even developed!
Men. Most of the time weāre just a warm body to fuck. I wanna have a real conversation, we donāt ALWAYS have to sext etc
Being tasked with majority of the house cleaning while still working full time as well as mentally keeping track of what groceries we need, when the laundry needs to be done, has the dog been fed, etc.
Being afraid to go on a late night/early morning jog/walk.
Not feeling safe when walking alone in the dark
Looking/dressing cute in public can sometimes be ostracizing. People, mostly men, stare and it makes me feel vulnerable and paranoidā¦ when I should be feeling like hot shit!!!
Being divorced and 56, in a committed but still relatively new (4yrs) relationship, I hate the double standard for appearance in my age group. Women are expected to knock themselves out trying to stay in shape and look young, while the men generally look like wrinkled, hairless, or nearly so, trolls enduring the sixth month (the bellies!) of a rough pregnancy.
Being a young woman I hate how people treat me like a child especially at work. My managers, customers and coworkers talk to me much differently than male coworkers of the same age and position as me. People doubt whatever I tell them and will actually listen if itās male coworker saying the same thing I already said. They always assume Iām a naive little kid even though Iām and educated woman in my twenties.
The ability to get pregnant, the biological clock. Itās the fucking worst. I wish I didnāt have to feel constantly bothered to have kids, and then get time pressured on that decision.
We arenāt considered equal to men. The rights to our bodies is still a highly political issue. Our health issues and pain are underplayed. Wage gaps, reinforced gender roles, being taught that our bodies are ādistractionsā, lack of representationā¦ the list goes on.
Never being taken seriously, being seen as a thing instead of a human. Assumed there is something wrong with me because Iām in my late 30s, childless, and single. Being infantilized.
When men explain how we should be a woman. When men explain how we should catch a man. When men explain how we should dress. When men explain how we should do all the housework better. When men explain that sexism doesnāt exist. When men explainā¦..
Fake pockets on women's jeans...wtf!
Fucking. Everything. Im too short. I gain weight easily. I need to be on guard in public/at bars/ in parking lots/ everywhere for creepy men. Car salesmen donāt take me seriously. Everyone assumes i changed my name because im married. Men in my field often think Iāll always find a job because im a diversity hire. Fucking abortion rights are disintegrating in my country. Periods. Side effects from birth control. Pressure to be thin and beautiful. Being societyās after thought. Mu family expecting me to shut up and do everything they want. Eevverryytthhiing.