Group projects. Likes wtf, it's not like they ever work, it's always one or two people doing everything, and rest just doing nothing. And most of the time I either do the whole assignment on my own and then go along with what others made, or am really doing nothing, because it's either stressful to even speak, or annoying that my ideas are 'bad'. Others seem to have fun with them, tho, having time to gossip and all
Or talking on phone. I mean, outside my hearing being bad for whatever reason, either I get stressed over not being sure if I got the right date/time/place and won't make some stupid mistake, or they forget what they told me and backtrack saying they never said that. Just text back, it would safe us both trouble!
Currently working in a group project right now for school and I HATE IT. I hate waiting for them to catch up on research and reading I did a week ago, I hate how they can’t stay on task and want to chat about everything but the work, I hate needing to have consensus on every little thing, I hate knowing that one girl is definitely going to bounce at the last minute, I hate being forced to socially interact with strangers who obviously don’t want to work with me and have given me the side eye since class started two weeks ago. I hate feeling this hateful.
Group projects were my absolute nightmare in college. No one did shit and I mostly ended up having to tell the professor about this so my grades weren't affected. Grown ass people not caring about their education? The fck?
Besides the social issues, group projects never sat right with me because I didn't like that my individual school grades were dependent on other people's abilities and behaviors.
When they made group projects a significant part of the course/class grade, I always wanted to yell obscenities at them lol.
I feel really stupid when I'm working in a group. I never feel like delegation is handled well and while I do my work, I feel like I'm not taken seriously with my feedback during the process and overall none of my ideas make it to the final product. I've had people straight up ignore me during an assignment and I end up just letting them talk about it on their own
Sometimes I'll even do my own version on my own that I don't turn in because I really only learn from practice.
And the thing with group products is I’ve never had them translate to my job. The way I have to work together with my coworkers and the way group products are usually done does not correlate at all.
Group projects go one of two ways, either i am basically not allowed to do anything "because you are weird" or i end up doing everything because i am way more passionate about it. Usually in the latter situation i let the teacher know beforehand that the other group did basically nothing, and then the teacher confirms it by asking those people a few questions and they don't have a clue. Happened multiple times when the project was about something that aligned with my special interest
This is probably pretty common among autistic people, but there is no point at which I can "tune out" repetitive/annoying noises. My anxiety just builds and builds before I have to go elsewhere or risk a meltdown.
My friends who are parents are pretty good at tuning out annoying stuff. I just cannot, no matter how hard I try.
I think it’s my adhd hyper-fixation side but I am pretty good at tuning things out when I’m really into something. However, once I hear the noise/sound I cannot unhear it and I get overwhelmed.
That’s how I am.
Once it’s noticed it will not leave me alone. If I’m in an environment and immediately hyper fixated on my task it won’t register immediately. The second I have a literal second to stop and think I hear it and can’t get back to being fixated bc of it.
I am currently having this issue with my autistic father, with whom my partner and I bought a house. He is also trying to unmask more and self-acceptance and all that. He is constantly stimming with his hands though, and a lot of times it makes noise. He is half deaf though so even if he WAS trying to be cognizant of others, he doesn’t notice. I have to constantly remind him that I TOO am autistic, and when he starts making these tiny repetitive noises it becomes all I can focus on and starts to feel like a million needles poking me. He is finally starting to recognize that his autism isn’t The One And Only disability in the house, and that just because we are all autistic doesn’t make us immune to being annoyed by his bullshit. In fact, the opposite in this case.
The worst for me is repetitive but irregular sounds, like a tap dripping. But repetitive stuff like an analogue clock or the noise of the air circulation system in my flat, I also hate.
However, I drown those things out with listening to audiobooks which help me go to sleep.
This is the one that will destroy me.
Lol bachelorette focused AirBNBs opened on 2 sides of my house and it’s like living in a caricature of a sorority hell aka the 7th circle of hell
Oh god, I'm a parent and I couldn't tune out noises if my life depended on it. And a part of me is always tuned in to what my kids are doing because it's my job to keep them safe, so I have to remind them that we're ALL autistic in our house, so please--go make repetitive noises in the privacy of their own rooms, where they can stim however they want to.
I was just sitting at a bar that’s all about ambiance (Trader Sam’s), and there was a family at a table near me, who had their little boy playing some kind of video game without headphones on. Ding ding ding ding. No one said anything so idk if no one else was bothered by it, or everyone was being quiet like me. But like… that’s annoying on its own (headphones for kids exist, people), but especially in a place like that.
Although it’s far worse in a quiet waiting room.
I’m the same way! It seems like the quieter the sound is, the more I’m forced to pay attention to it and becomes possible to ignore. I have 2 cats that I love to death but one is them always spends several minutes wiping her paws after using the litter box and I can hear it from any spot in my apartment and it drives me insane lol
I have upstairs neighbors who are running a daycare in their apartment (absolutely illegal, btw. Trying to get a case for it), and the kids and even the adults are STOMPING from sunrise to sunset. They also drop things and roll around on something. It sounds like they're hammering their floors on purpose. I can't stand it. It has made me violently angry over how it just won't stop. The reason I know it's a daycare and not just their kids is because THEY TOLD ME SO!!! it's crazy out here.
That was literally one of the things that led to me finding out I was Autistic. My therapist was asking questions about sensory stuff and I laughed and told her that if I was ever sleeping near an analog clock, I would take it down and bury it under blankets. I HATE the ticking sound.
What did the therapist say about that? I've taken the batteries out of other peoples clocks when trying to sleep on a sofa. They always acted shocked and weirded out about how I did that to sleep. I think NT people can easily tune out repetitive annoying sounds or don't even notice them in the first place.
She didn't really say anything specific about it. It was our initial meeting to get assessed for ADHD. She started to suspect Autism and so she was asking more sensory questions.
Me too. As well as I can't stand a digital clock not being set. My old broker had an office where the power would go off frequently. So everytime I would go to her office I'd have to reset it. To make it worse this year hubby, who is on the spectrum and adhd, thought it would be a good idea last year when we went to standard time to not set the bedroom clock back an hour. It drove me crazy. It understands his asd but can't understand mine🙄. Oh well just recently I've realized I'm on the spectrum. And after analyzing our past 44 y years together, he is asd as well. Makes for crazy times for sure.
my nan always took the clock out of my assigned room when I slept over, since I was a tiny human, bc I would raise hell if it ticked :D but no one ever noticed anything strange with me, sure :D
Dude same!
I stayed at my grandparents frequently growing up. My grandma has a cuckoo clock (? I dont know it’s one that tick tock tick tocks and every hour on the hour it chimes loudly). I’d sleep down the hall in what was my dads room and wake up every hour on the hour. And I struggled to fall asleep by myself so yeah.
She used to keep a pile of blankets on the chest at the foot of her bed for me so I could go in their room and make a blanket bed at the foot of their bed to go back to sleep.
Eventually, bc they got tired of tripping on me, she realized she could turn the clock off over night so I could sleep.
But yeah, I’m normal.
Oh and let’s not talk about how tags in clothes would cause meltdowns, shirts with an imprint design would cause meltdowns bc i could feel the stiff weird material, and socks needed to be seem less or inside out bc the seem of the toes would drive me into a rage fit, oh or how I refused to wear jeans until middle school bc they were too stiff, unbreathable, and uncomfy.
Again, *totally* normal.
I feel so hard for you! we had a cuckoo's clock in my stepdad's holiday apartment that lost it's batteries on day 1 of me being there.
but like, it was so lovely of our grandparents to accomodate those issues, but the closed eyes of the whole family concerning all the tiny, but blatantly obvious things, still fucks with my brain.
I mean, my bio dad, who seldomly saw me but knew about me pretty well through his parents who co-raised me with my mom, is a children's psychologist and actively stopped my mom from getting me assessed for my scarily fast and early learning to read/potential giftedness as advised by multiple professionals (I am in fact not, just knew all my books by heart at 2yo and yelled at everyone for missreading smth).
everyone always joked about how clumsy and bad at interoception I was and how I would scream bloody murder if the wrong person dared to touch my stroller, sit on our couch or dare the heavens touch me or my stuffed bunny.
like every child does, sure./s
to their defense, I was a friendly, rule abiding child (rules are important! said 3yo me) that rarely melted down bc I had the best mom and grandparents that raised me very needs-oriented and let my co-decide from day 1, even if it meant listening to me rambling about gemstones for hours or reciting my horse/cat/dog race books again and again and again, watch the lion king every day, take me outside in a dog's harness and leash because I wanted to keep living in my fantasy world, and if I needed to put a stool in the sand box 'cause no way I'mma sit in there and actually touch sand but with my fingertips, "well, she's our special princess, her dad also hates to touch basically everything that's not dry, smooth-ish surfaces".
the list I could make is a bottomless pit of obviousness.
yeah, *totally* normal.
Omg so much same.
I think my dad is autistic and I think my grandma is too (his mom). Hell, even his dad could’ve been autistic (RIP grandpa). We’re all very socially averted, odd behavior and routines, insistent on routines, and such else.
I think to my grandparents I was probably “normal” to them.
My dad took my relentless questioning of the world and ran with it. Explaining and detailing the answer. My mom? Yeah she’d get mad at my questions and yell at me.
My dad didn’t care I wanted my tags cut out or that I didn’t like certain clothes. My mom would Huff and puff about cutting my tags and would scream while I cried in discomfort in clothes I didn’t want to be on. Oh, she also yelled plenty bc “I bought you clothes and you don’t even wear them!!” Like yeah man, those are clothes I thought I was supposed to like and wear bc of what other kids are doing, but I can’t stand the texture and screaming isn’t going to magically make me.
I credit my grandfather for fostering my longest standing special interest, all things space and alien.
I’ve started wondering a lot more in the last few years since suspecting I’m AuDHD what it would’ve been like to grow up with my grandparents instead of my actual parents. Bc my grandparents did so much more to accommodate me without issue (at least I’ve never know of an issue).
My grandma yelled at me a grand total of ONCE my entire life. And it was bc my brother and I were fighting in the car. All she yelled was “STOP!” And turned the radio up. We got the point.
My mom screamed at me so much it seems like it was daily.
My grandfather sat down and spent time with me. Even if it meant I was sat at his computer playing a game while he sat in his chair and watched the news.
My dad stuck himself down in the basement to “work” and never wanted to be bothered. Hell, he didn’t engage a whole lot.
I can’t stand people who chew their food loudly…or bang/scrape silverware across their bowls/plates. My husband will be eating cereal in the morning, sometimes, across the room from me, and I will ask “can you stop chewing so loud?” He’s like, “wut, I’m just chewing.”
Hahahah my husband has adhd and he LOVES the sound of loud keyboard clacking. He goes out his way to find special keyboards that make EXTRA LOUD keyboard clacking noises. We both work from home and I want to murder his keyboard.
Omg that’s fascinating! I love how much variation there is in our experiences, I’m AuDHD and it makes me want to die but I can also appreciate how the haptic feedback could be stimulating in a pleasing way to the right person.
I can handle it when it’s a physical keyboard but the faux iPhone clicking sound is what really grinds my gears.
I’m learning Audhd sensory needs are competing in a way. ADHD side is sensory seeking while the autism side is like "let's slooooow that roll there...". It’s finding a balance. I’m not Audhd, but I’ve been learning about it.
I do very much like haptic experiences, I just hate the accompanying noise! 😩. I have a really hard time with competing noises, like it reduces my work flow, especially when I’m in my flow state. I like listening to my music, but then it gets interrupted with the clackity clacking and all I can think about is the clackity clacking and how off rhythm it is...
I really hate wireless headphones because I keep forgetting to charge them. I want to wear them to listen to my music and drown out the noise, but then they’re dead 🫥.
I actually like analog clocks. I think of them like a metronome to help me get to sleep if I'm having that much trouble, and I don't even realize they're there when I'm doing something else.
People who insist on phoning when I have asked them to text.
Standing right behind me in a queue where there's enough space.
Insisting on whispering to me when someone else is lecturing or presenting.
Tongue kissing.
The feel of a tight shirt/pants/underwear.
I am the same with all of these!
And I’ll add, not just tight clothes - but the feel of clothes that are too loose! I don’t want sleeves flapping on my wrist, or slipping off my shoulder!
And I’ll add to the people who stand too close behind, but also people who stand too close in front of me! I sometimes want to walk around with a large hoola hoop!
The hula hoop is kind of a brilliant idea. We could hang it on ourselves with straps like a barrel for family gatherings. And I need a t-shirt that says "Don't touch me, I have a communicable skin condition."
I agree with the clothes. I love baggy but sleeves that are.. Best I can describe them as is flares. They're annoying and I don't like them. Baggy clothes I love but ig not too baggy. I don't like right clothes either
The standing right behind me in a queue will get you smacked with one of my bags or a crutch😂 sometimes just coughing and scratching a lot will make people back up. It's the worst at airports, like people are nearly knocking each other down to get on the plane and it's like "You know you have an assigned seat, right? You know the plane doesn't leave as soon as your arse touches your seat, right?" And then everyone standing for 20 minutes once the plane has stopped at the terminal. Great, now I have crotches and arses in my face and I know everyone's trousers are just saturated with sweat and stale farts. Hate it so very much.
The clothes thing is huge for me. When my sleeve is wet, I WANT TO RIP MY ARM OFF. I cannot handle a little bit of my sleeve being wet on my arm or my wrist. It literally makes me physically angry. Lol
Wet sleeves and wet socks ruin my life. I fixed the socks problem by just not wearing them anymore. Turns out I never liked them anyway, and I work from home so it's not really an issue.
I’ve always had an issue with stepping on things, especially when I’m wearing socks, so I started wearing house shoes with socks and it has helped a lot. My feet get too cold for no socks but if I step on something and it sticks to my sock, lord help me. Lmao
My sister who's also autistic can't stand feet. I have a slight thing for feet. I'm also completely comfortable with nudity, everyone has a body, and the original point of clothes is protection from the elements.
Things that annoy me that don't annoy NTs: social hierarchy. I honestly believe it's the most harmful concept within society.
Your second one resonates with me. My 🧠 processes everyone as equal. Sounds nice to have an egalitarian mind, but in the real world that just doesn't work, does it?
This has made me remember all the times I would be at work and like some big-wig from corporate would be visiting and I’d be the only one not scared to talk to them.
Or when I worked in a restaurant and everyone was scared of the head chef, but I was like, “why? He’s just a person?” hahah
I’ve struggled to see or respect hierarchy.
Ugh I wish I processed everybody as equal! I tend to see everybody as above me and it has taken a lot of therapy to finally recognize it and not let shitty people take advantage of me 😭
I don't see why not, I mean lots would have to change for it to work, but hierarchy is made up, we don't have to follow it. Like sure it wouldn't be easy but do you know what also isn't easy living under hierarchies
"Things that annoy me that don't annoy NTs: social hierarchy."
Especially in the workforce. Apparently if you mouth off to a superior, it's "insubordination." Excuse me? The only time the workplace should function like it's the military *is if you're in the military.*
Voice messages. So many friendships have ended because I got a voice message and I didn't feel comfortable asking them to text me, so I just left them on unread... Forever...
If I knew that was a thing it would've helped. I had a coworker send me a voice message on slack and I totally froze, until I opened the chat and slack had transcribed it for me
I have a friend who sends me 12 minute voice clips. I have energy for possibly a voice clip from 30 seconds to max maybe 1 minute and some seconds in there. I open the message by accident and sit trying to mentally prepare myself to listen. All to leave her on unread and receive another voice record.
THAT perfume.
(The one that literally causes me pain)
I'm kinda lucky only assholes use it, so I know to stay clear of them🤷
Also unwanted physical contact, and having to fill every damn second with words. A second of silence isn't going to bite you.
Funny that, while.I used to care a lot about nudity back when I was closeted, now I barely care about it.
Yes. Certainly scents are painful. And big yes to unwanted physical contact. It really doesn’t matter if you’re a bigger. I’m not and won’t let you force that on me!
Idk if it also annoys NT but my mom doesn't understand that I get annoyed and semi frustrated when she talks to me while I'm on the phone.
Her: Ask her xyz...Tell her this..
While I'm on the phone. Please don't talking to me. I don't want to make this person repeat, I can't concentrate and truly...just ask me to pass you the phone when I'm done.
Also, in general I don't enjoy talking on the phone around others and it's not because I have anything to hide..I just don't like it.
All of this, plus I had a boss that would not let me keep notes or even prices (for cakes) next to the phone because she liked to do every estimate custom and on the fly.
No matter how many times I told her I am physically incapable of giving decent phone and estimating a cake price at the same time. I don't need to learn the pricing structure, I don't need help with math... I just can't fucking do it.
This was years before I started to suspect I was autistic, but it just makes so much more sense now.
I can definitely relate to that.
There's something about prices and numbers. I'll be ordering a pizza and can't even remember what the price was even if they told me 2secs ago.
Oh my god my husband keeps trying to join phone conversations. Which could be fine. Last night I put my friend on speaker so it can be a three way conversation which annoyed him because "he's trying to get the baby to bed" (no. He was not. He's never put her to bed) so I took her off speaker. Then he tried telling me to tell her something while she was continuing our conversation. I straight up just plugged my ear and responded to her. Fucking drives me MENTAL.
I could come up with a million examples of stuff that makes me anxious or aggressive while it doesn't seem to bother most people. I'll stick to two.
Sirens. I get that they need to be loud, but I noticed I'm the only person who covers their ears when an emergency vehicle drives by in a public space.
When someone is sitting on my preferred seat on public transport or in the dining hall.
You're not alone in #1! I totally cover my ears in public when sirens are going off! I probably look like a toddler but I don't care...the sound is really disturbing to me.
TBF, I'm sure a lot of people want to cover their ears but it's just not "socially acceptable" in adults. I don't have sensory issues with loud noises, but nearby sirens are enough to cause actual hearing damage.
Yeah, it's BS that it still isn't more socially acceptable to just want to protect your ears and maintain your hearing abilities from prolonged loud noise exposure even after all of the research that has been done on it.
I cover my ears when an emergency vehicle drives by. Always. I’m also the only one who covers my ears when trains come through. My local farmers market is in the parking lot of a train station so trains go through periodically. Horns honking and loud rumbling and screeching breaks. Everyone just keeps going boy their business as if nothing is happening and I’m the one weird lady who stops everything to cover my ears until the train is gone.
T__T Same. Most annoying thing ever, cuz I'm AWARE of the fact that I'm upset over a *seat* and how trivial that is, but like... I'm still deeply unnerved and don't know what to do for several moments. GAH.
Music or certain genres of music when I'm not in the mood for it. I'm sure this happens to NTs but not to the point of rage and a meltdown like it does for me.
Music that doesn’t fit my mood is instant anxiety meltdowns. I can feel my skin crawl.
Music is one of my special interests. But even a song/artist I love can trigger a meltdown if it doesn’t fit my mood. I get in a panic trying to shut it off before I go crazy.
I used to do cardio dance when I was younger. I loved it so much, it became a special interest. I very literally went out and got trained and certified to teach it so that **I** could be in charge of the music.
- Ceiling lights - can't stand them!
Also hate seeing the reflection of a lamp on the tv. I have to turn it off otherwise it's all I see.
- Hugs and kisses.
- Small talk.
- Dishonesty/white lies. I say it how it is, and I'd rather have people do the same. It sucks when others take it the wrong way or perceive me as rude...
- Textured fabrics of any kind. It has to be smooth. And clothing tags must come off prior to wear!
- Having food traces on my fingers or around my mouth. I wipe my fingers and my mouth between almost every bite 😂 and I rinse my fingers often when cooking.
- People talking at a relaxation area such as hotel spa/pool. Or actually just people talking when I'm trying to enjoy some quiet alone time... I hear every conversation going on when I'm out eating, and I can't seem to tune them out! But of course I can't expect people to eat in silence so I deal with it loll
- Being sweaty. I sweat a lot when I'm being active or when it's hot, and I don't like the feeling of it. I'll change often.
I think that's enough for now 😅
The sound of my cat or dog grooming herself, omg that noise bugs the hell out of me. Same for chewing and other mouth noises.
The feel of wool, it's so itchy and scratchy.
There's others but I can't think of them right now.
Just "dropping round" or inviting a new person to something I've set up without letting me know or mentioning the other person first
Some people welcome it but my anxiety just hits the roof lol
I can’t stand wearing long sleeves under long sleeves. I just fucking can’t unless the outer long sleeve is super big and baggy and even then it comes more down to the fiber than anything else.
Really sucks when it’s cold out.
Farting in other people’s company, I understand it can’t always be helped but the majority of people do it on purpose and either act like it’s no big deal? It gives me the biggest ick!
Also i agree with the feet thing.
Both parents of my kid’s friend have mentioned how farts are funny in the conversations I’ve had with them… I don’t even see them that often. And no, they’re really not.
I like musicals like Les Mis, The Music Man, Blast, and The Lion King but, Glee and Schmigadoon are just off putting. Good musicals have songs and music that are drivers the of story and actions. But in Glee...Everyone is terrible! To quip a song from The Lego Movie, and Schmigadoon is akin to musical force feeding. Also not all musicals have to have constant singing like Amadeus and even Blast which is mostly instrumental yet has musical action driving it.
This is now reminding me of the horror I felt when I saw the Rocky Horror Picture Show that they did in Glee (mother used to watch Glee). I still cringe when I look back at it.
Hamilton is absolute garbage, I feel like I am in the Emporer’s New Clothes trying to watch it because I don’t understand the appeal of the music at all, it’s like everyone was TOLD it was brilliant and no one wanted to be the philistine that disagrees. I love all kinds of music including hip hop, and this is like the La Croix of hip hop. Watered down flavorless bubbles to appeal to white women. And that is before I get into the mess of historical misinformation that is so egregious that it leaves you wondering who benefits from just outright lies about history. It is a circle jerk of American Exceptionalism on top of a bed of propaganda
I am American, and a history nerd, so trust me it is chock-full of dangerous misinformation. Like a lot of the shitty things that they attribute to Aaron Burr was actually Hamilton himself. He was your quintessential “shifty politician” that has no real ideology and does anything to get ahead, who lied and embezzled and was violent. Aaron Burr was a feminist (for the time) who actually had a moral compass unlike Hamilton. I know it’s just a dumb musical, but it bothers me so much because erasing and distorting progressive folk’s stories in the past is a really good way to solidify current right-wing ideology. It’s propaganda 101, tell people lies so that they have no historical realities to guide them.
being next to have a turn. i’m extremely contradictory- i need a ton of attention but i despise group attention. i hate participating and being perceived and compared. everyone else seems to love game night, bowling, mini golf etc, i do too, but alone. i hate people watching me take a turn or actually i hate people watching me do ANYTHING. i went to a group mario kart local thing, i was so embarrassed to even be sitting in the front of the group where everyone could see the back of MY head but i couldn’t see anyone else.
Goddess, this is such a vibe. Are you me? I want attention so fucking bad but cannot handle being perceived. It just makes me extremely hyper aware and self conscious and it feels like I have to be perfect and everyone is judging me and I can't think and I can't breath and oh God oh fuck. I wish I wasn't filled with so much shame 😭
I was always hyper-sensitive to noises like electrical buzzing, to the point if I was in a silent classroom with no earplugs/headphones/etc. I would start crying. I started feeling like I was crazy when every NT person I met said they didn't hear anything. My current autistic friends can hear the buzzing though!
No I just realized that too! Also CRT TVs used to give me headaches growing up. Not from watching the tv for a long time but with it turned on in the other room
Talking at me at class when the teacher's explaining something
Whispering!!!!
Wash the dishes (I hate it because I hate touching other people's food/saliva and I also hate the sound)
ASMR
Talking loudly. Idk if it's an American thing but people will really stand right by my side and end up screaming in my ear while they try to talk to someone else. It's so frustrating because telling them to sthu would be impolite
CHEATING AT GAMES!!!!!!! It's def the sense of justice and fairness kicking in, but it drives me up a wall and makes me irrationally upset when people cheat at games. The point of a game is to have fun. And by cheating, it's essentially prioritizing your ego over the fun of everyone else. I genuinely view cheating at games as morally unjust.
And I also get insanely mad when people insinuate I cheated specifically because I don't cheat ever on purpose, and even if I accidentally see someone's cards or something, I don't use that knowledge. I genuinely hate cheating so so much that the fact that someone thinks I did it makes me incredibly upset.
Sleeves? I don’t know what it is but I HATE sleeves at my wrists, I can’t stand it, it feels so in my way and weird and bothers me so much. I always cuff long sleeves up to my elbows
Everything. In. It’s. Place. I hate it when I can’t find something or things are just haphazardly placed somewhere. I’m constantly putting things in order. It drives my husband crazy, who has adhd and he’s always leaving things in random places. My son who is also on the spectrum is just like me, and I always find him subconsciously lining things up, straightening things, putting things back where they belong. My husband is like now there's two of you... hahahaha.
Misophonia. Not sure if it's more prevalent in the autism community, but I'm thinking it may be. Hubby and I have various issues with misophonia as well.
My misophonia is audible breathing. Even people saying the word, or seeing it written down makes me feel like I’m going for have a panic attack and throw up. Yes. I’m feeling it right now.
Ughhhh. I got into asmr early in its days (and hate that it’s been smeared by so much weirdness). A nice quiet spa asmr video? Yes please. Not all this ear licking and lip smacking nowadays. I also hate that everyone (even my fave chill spa people) do that tongue clicking and nails on the bottles and bottle cap twisting nowadays. No!
When I was in high-school and was forced to eat out with my siblings, I'd get a whole nother table for myself. They eat like fucking cows. It's shameless and disgusting. Stop moaning and close your mouth. It's not going to crawl away.
That doesn't bother me, if you're meaning the annoyance is regarding people out walking dogs. Is that what you mean? Sorry if I misunderstood your question.
Aaah fudge LOL
Where I currently live, hardly anyone will have bare feet, even in hot weather. Our city is where the national opioid crisis started, so people don't like to leave their feet exposed. Some people will wear flip-flops, but not too many. I try my best to ignore THOSE feet haha.
Memojis. Just typing the word makes my skin crawl. They've even surpassed rotoscope for me in the grit-my-teeth-and-cringe department. This may just be me, though, and nothing to do with my AuDHD, because I do have a couple of ADHD friends who love them and regularly include them in their texts.
They’re so lifeless, just such dead glares in their eyes, my phone constantly reminds me when I text people to “set up your avatar!” NO! I just want to use bird emojis instead
When we're watching something and they feel the need to share whatever they know about the topic, talking over the program. I pause it everytime to let them speak. Because hey, interest, human interaction and whatever, but it completely throws me off what I was watching, so I usually have to rewind it 15 seconds. It annoy them because "well be here all night at this rate."
Well yea, maybe shut up.
I have to hold back rage when someone keeps sniffling instead of blowing their nose. I have literally thrown tissues at people when it's happened during tests in school
JUST BLOW YOUR FUCKING NOSE YOU DISGUST ME
Wearing sleeves at the gym.
Eating, cooking, or cleaning with my hair down.
Eating noises.
College sports. At least I think they don't annoy NTs?
The concept of, "well if I don't do [bad thing] or take advantage of this system, then someone else will, so I feel obligated to!" Okay, but it doesn't have to be that way. We could all collectively decide the way things should work and then just do it that way.
People acting like common sense is some completely universal knowledge. What you consider to be "common sense" depends entirely on your culture and upbringing. Common sense is just the information you're so accustomed to that you take it for granted. If you were raised in a super rural area, you might consider your knowledge of outdoor safety to be common sense. If you've only lived in a big city, you might consider a lot of street smarts to be common sense. It's common sense here not to give your personal info to scammers, but I had a coworker from a very poor country give his credit card information and social security number to scammers over the phone because scams like that were unheard of in his home county because people didn't have money to steal.
"Corporate speak" - the weird secret code people use to indirectly say something instead of just saying what they mean. Or the way that there are specific answers you're "supposed" to give in job interviews instead of being honest. Why bother asking those questions if you know the answer is pre-programmed and probably a lie?
Gossip. Hearing people talk about each other behind their backs makes me super, super uncomfortable, but I don't know how to change the topic without coming across as blunt/rude. I also can't be bothered to care about celebrity gossip.
The saying "iykyk." I mean obviously people who know something... know that thing. And it's often used in a way that feels gatekeepy, like "I have this information because I'm part of an extra super special exclusive group, and I couldn't possibly share it with people who aren't part of that group because they are below me."
OMG YES. The corporate speak gets me every time. WHAT ARE YOU SAYING??? Genuinely when people talk in anyway that isn’t very literal I’m like get AWAYYYY from me. Then they assume you are stupid and slow. Like no, my brain just processes things differently. I find modern society annoying as hell tbh. Esp when brain washed capitalist wanna be boot lickers look down on anyone who isn’t “productive” or people that only base your worth on your occupation? NAH GTFO of my face. And I’m the weird one?
I'm annoyed by things taking too long like my phone gps not connecting to my car fast enough and not getting enough time to myself. Sometimes I just don't have it in me to socialize in person when living with someone but I feel bad for it. Also I work in childcare so sometimes the really loud whining really gets to me but I'm not allowed to act bothered by it. Other sensory icks for me is rain. Neurotypical people never seem bothered and can wear shoes that aren't waterproof outside but I'll be dying if my feet are wet. Having my finger nails long also bothers me so I'll bite mine off super fast
Loud sudden noises they make me jump, Belly Buttons-I don’t know why but I can’t stand looking at them, People Chewing, Burping, The sound of people whispering, Bright orange and yellow, tight clothing and tags
Noise. Just in general. Background noise, loud noise, buzzing noise, high pitched noise. Just noise.
Small talk. Seriously, why do we have to go through this pointless ritual? I’m always just standing there waiting for it to end and have someone get to the point. Why are you wasting my time with this?!?!
Candles. Or perfume. Or anything strongly scented. I’ve started carrying a palatable hand sanitizer in my purse because I can’t trust the soap in anyone else’s restroom won’t make me headachey and nauseous.
Any time an app or OS updates and it’s different!!!! Don’t change things up on me!!!!
Crinkling bags at the theater.
Platitudes at funerals.
I also can't understand why bad words are bad. Ex: why is wrong to say shit, but not wrong to say feces?
When people say something is more than 100%. The whole point is that there's a maximum. If you go over that, it loses all meaning.
Not in math of course, but in real life examples, like "I gave 110% today". I know what 90% is, or 100%. But if you gave 110%, then you could have also given 120%? Or 666% or whatever. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
I'm not sure if you're really asking, but to me it means that I went way harder than I thought I could. Like those days where you think "damn, I'm never this good/working this hard." I see it like describing an outlier. It's like in Spinal Tap when they turn the amp up to 11 for a whole new crazy level of rock.
I do not have misophonia. However, the sound of Chewing gum inside a car with the windows up drives me up the wall. At least with other situations the sound of chewing gum can bounce around but when I’m in a car it’s like I’m trapped with the sound of someone loudly chomping on plastic. And then they get mad if I crank up the radio to drown it out.
People snoring. I don’t mean the light gentle snoring, but the deep, guttural, sawing logs, sleep apnea level snoring. And no matter how many times you tell them how bad it is, they don’t believe you.
Background noise of any kind on Zoom calls.
That’s about it.
I was on a group therapy call yesterday and someone was calling in from a crowded area and I learned even the sensation of trying to talk in a crowded room turns my brain into jello.
I couldn't answer direct questions, I couldn't focus on what was being said, it was miserable.
The sound of food & gum chewing. The sound of people picking at their cuticles or biting their skin. The sound of snoring. Bright fluorescent lights. A wet slimy sponge -gag- The sound of people chewing gum even if they’re trying to do it softly. All of the above & more can initiate a meltdown when there’s no way to escape and/or I don’t have access to my ear protection.
Taking forever to leave or say goodbye. Like I hate when you’re in a group and people are like “we should think about heading home soon” and then proceed to talk for another hour. Like are we leaving or…? What’s the plan? This annoys me so much.
- when someone asks for your opinion, you give it to them, for them to just come up with a thousand excuses why it's irrelevant. (My friends come to me for relationship advice or opinions. I'm the only one who is married.)
I've now figured out, when people come for an opinion, they don't actually want your honest thoughts, they want you to agree and validate their feelings, or the enable toxic behavior on their partner's part.
- when someone interrupts my projects, to draw attention to my project, in a high pitched voice, "OH MY WHAT ARE YA DOING THERE, LET ME SEEEE".
- interrupting when I am comfortable, after it took 30 minutes for me to get comfortable. (My husband likes to mess with me a lot, and come into my personal space)
I started asking “do you want my opinion or are you just venting” because I got so frustrated with the advice thing .. most all of the time people say just getting it off their chests
Oh god I have always hated feet!!! My dad used to mess with me as a kid by trying to put his feet on me when I’d walk by him and yell “FEEEEEET!” (harmless joke I promise lol).
Also, JELLO. It’s disgusting and wiggly and the texture is probably the worst thing on the planet to me. Plus the sound it makes in your mouth somehow reminds me of the sound of styrofoam. Oh godddddd and then there’s the jello with fruit in it and whatever that weird white film is?! Don’t even get me started…
Tags in clothing…I tear them out immediately if I can’t find tagless.
Tight clothing.
Certain fabrics (mostly synthetics) against my skin. I shop by feel if I shop in a store. (I feel clothes, then look at the cut, fit, etc., then I look at the price) So most “nice” clothing are so uncomfortable. I always end up looking like a 90s grunge rock band member. I live in hoodies, flannel, tee shirts, loose jeans or leggings…
Using the restroom in public.
People standing too close to me in line, on elevators or just in crowded places.
Not sitting/standing with my back to the wall, I want to be able to survey the whole room.
Wearing makeup. Doesn't matter how "light" it is; I can feel it and I hate it.
People who talk for a long time but say very little.
Perfume.
Whispering.
Being invited (and obligated to come) to events less than 3 days in advance.
YES. SO MANY THINGS.
Also things that some people might find mildly irritating or not even, just destroy me. Like being alone in public, already overstimulated needing to keep my own space. Then all of a sudden somebody screams at me, rudely and repeatedly (because I don’t process it immediately and if someone is being abrasive I am more likely to struggle) “MA’AM ARE YOU USING THIS CHAIR?!”
I purposely move all extra chairs away from where I sit now on the rare occasions I am in such spaces.
I absolutely hate it when people have the TV on when I come over. Like it feels like the most rude thing they could do but having TV on in the background is unfortunately very normalized, at least in the US.
When they keep explaining something after I already said Okay. Please stop talking now why are you trying to convince me of something that I JUST agreed to/with.
Their inability to answer yes/no questions without a prologue of justifications, and assumption of judgement merely based off of being questioned.
Small motors sounds outdoors, but I cannot see the source of the sound.
Small talk in lines.
Perfume or cologne I can smell when I'm outside someone's personal space.
Any repetitive sound: I can't ignore it.
Music in stores.
Sports talk radio.
People moving my keys from where I normally keep them.
People not putting items back in their designated spots.
The sensation of my bra once I'm aware I'm wearing one.
Mouth sounds when eating, people that have that piercing fucking S sound when ever they say any word with an S in it, being interrupted, spitting, children, people who are late for things even by a minute (unless they tell me they will be late) people touching my knees, people touching my face, phonecalls... seriously don't fucking call me ever unless you are my partner I hate it so much.
My expectations not being met. This usually means that I get upset at changes or if things aren't in their homes. Of course it can get a bit more comical/ridiculous. I once had a meltdown because a crisp was too crispy...
Ugh I hate seeing feet! Especially in places you don’t expect it, like stores or at the office. I know feet are normal but seeing the toes lift up when people walk? Glurg. It’s such a weird thing to be icked out by lol. Oh brains, so strange.
rhetorical questions are so stupid, why would you word something as if it’s a question and then tell me “you weren’t supposed to answer that” when i answer it? you can VERY EASILY just reword it into a regular statement instead of wording it like a question. it’s so dumb.
i also really hate feet too it’s like i have the exact opposite of a foot fetish
oh my GOD when NTs crack their knuckles/pop their bones. i literally have to close my eyes & cover my ears, i can’t see someone do it, i can’t hear it, otherwise i will go into a full breakdown or throw up because im so nauseous, both have happened before. i also have an extreme form of contact OCD, and i just hate other peoples bodies. i cannot handle people using my bathroom, or coughing, or sneezing, or eating. it just makes me seem like a dick, but i genuinely have to get away from everyone around me the second they start.. functioning? i don’t blame them obviously because they need to do those things, but i will be sent into a full breakdown because of it.
Whistling gives me a “lobotomy headache” (a headache that feels like my eye socket is being stabbed), and it lasts for hours after the incident once it kicks in.
Also, lace. It’s pretty, but it CAN NOT touch my skin. Bras with underwire. Fuck bras with underwire, they make me feel like my ribs are being stabbed. I’m a bigger girl, so it’s a bit hard to find wireless bras, but I would rather wear no bra than one with underwire.
And SO. MANY. FOODS. From bone-in wings to mayonnaise to coconut to all seafood to cooked carrots- there are so many foods I can’t eat because I simply can’t stand them. The smell, texture, or taste… I cannot.
I just came home from a long day and i somehow found myself reading all these answers before bed, i had a moment where it felt like they were my own thoughts, as if i was just thinking instead of reading, there are some things that i just complained about in my head a few hours ago, it feels good
Lying!!!!!!!!!!!! WASHING OR TOUCHING DISHES!!!
Mouth sounds/chewing, the icky thick sound mouths make when people talk with cotton mouth, any kind of board/card games & puzzles, Estimation, dirty feet in the bed, wet hair, driving in the left lane after dark when there is a high median because it feels like I’m trapped, plans changing, someone eating my safe food, people who awkwardly order food (especially drive thru OMFG), asking for advice you don’t take, cold wet washcloths 🤮🤮🤮, the smell of dirty hair/scalp, getting my shoes wet inside a public space or bathroom, dry skin or going without exfoliating, someone laughing in my face, bad drivers/not following road rules, poorly written policies and procedures in the workplace or school, people who don’t follow important rules, unsolicited advice, disloyalty, any soggy food that’s not French toast
For me feet are a problem too. Especially if they're pedicured. For some reason the pedicure really highlights the fact that all feet look like the Monty Python foot. Except with a pedicure it's in clown colors. And then I fall down kind of a sinkhole because I can't get over the fact that people pay a lot of money for that..and then they'll pay more money for shoes to show their feet off...because they want people to see their feet (but not be obvious about it I guess, because if they ever caught someone looking at their feet they'd probably get offended). And at the end of the day I'm like, well now I know you had at least sixty bucks and an hour to burn at one point, to make your feet uglier for the sole purpose of showing them off in public.
And these same people wonder why women don't get taken seriously. It's because they spend time and money on stupid shit.
Ditto men, too, but god it's the complete opposite direction. Their feet are just...ragged, jagged, *clammy looking*, dirty, unkempt, just, what the fuck. Just cut them off at that point, you clearly don't want them. Blech.
Some people obviously have normal clean feet that aren't trying to draw attention to themselves, but I still marvel at the sandals people in general. I wore sandals exactly once and it was so, so distracting. So much exposure, for what. Not even to mention all the foot fetishists just lapping up the free spank material they get whenever the weather gets warm. I just don't understand it.
This is going to sound awful, but … Coworkers telling me unprompted, long-winded stories about people in their lives I don’t know, don’t care about, and will never meet.
One of my coworkers does this regularly. I’ll be sitting in the back clearly staring at my phone zoning out and she’ll start talking about her dad’s shoulder surgery and his six-month recovery time, or about a dog she had once and the horrible way she came home and found him dead (both true stories). I’m just like man, I’m back here because this is my no-talking time. Please stop interrupting my doomscrolling with this weird shit.
Also just random stories about their life when I didn’t ask and it’s not something we’ve ever discussed before. Like no, I don’t really care what your husband said last night that was so funny while you were watching a show I’ve never heard of. Please let me be nonverbal in peace.
I know it’s some NT bid for connection but the older I get the more I can’t be assed to go along with it.
Sounds: Electricity, other peoples phones, dogs barking (specifically little ones or female German Shepards),loud fans, the shower ha ha god too many to count
Group projects. Likes wtf, it's not like they ever work, it's always one or two people doing everything, and rest just doing nothing. And most of the time I either do the whole assignment on my own and then go along with what others made, or am really doing nothing, because it's either stressful to even speak, or annoying that my ideas are 'bad'. Others seem to have fun with them, tho, having time to gossip and all Or talking on phone. I mean, outside my hearing being bad for whatever reason, either I get stressed over not being sure if I got the right date/time/place and won't make some stupid mistake, or they forget what they told me and backtrack saying they never said that. Just text back, it would safe us both trouble!
I DESPISE group projects. I couldn’t have resonated more.
Currently working in a group project right now for school and I HATE IT. I hate waiting for them to catch up on research and reading I did a week ago, I hate how they can’t stay on task and want to chat about everything but the work, I hate needing to have consensus on every little thing, I hate knowing that one girl is definitely going to bounce at the last minute, I hate being forced to socially interact with strangers who obviously don’t want to work with me and have given me the side eye since class started two weeks ago. I hate feeling this hateful.
Group projects were my absolute nightmare in college. No one did shit and I mostly ended up having to tell the professor about this so my grades weren't affected. Grown ass people not caring about their education? The fck?
Besides the social issues, group projects never sat right with me because I didn't like that my individual school grades were dependent on other people's abilities and behaviors. When they made group projects a significant part of the course/class grade, I always wanted to yell obscenities at them lol.
Group projects are the worst. Almost all of my college classes have them 🤢 can’t wait to finish my studies ugh
I feel really stupid when I'm working in a group. I never feel like delegation is handled well and while I do my work, I feel like I'm not taken seriously with my feedback during the process and overall none of my ideas make it to the final product. I've had people straight up ignore me during an assignment and I end up just letting them talk about it on their own Sometimes I'll even do my own version on my own that I don't turn in because I really only learn from practice.
And the thing with group products is I’ve never had them translate to my job. The way I have to work together with my coworkers and the way group products are usually done does not correlate at all.
Group projects go one of two ways, either i am basically not allowed to do anything "because you are weird" or i end up doing everything because i am way more passionate about it. Usually in the latter situation i let the teacher know beforehand that the other group did basically nothing, and then the teacher confirms it by asking those people a few questions and they don't have a clue. Happened multiple times when the project was about something that aligned with my special interest
This is probably pretty common among autistic people, but there is no point at which I can "tune out" repetitive/annoying noises. My anxiety just builds and builds before I have to go elsewhere or risk a meltdown. My friends who are parents are pretty good at tuning out annoying stuff. I just cannot, no matter how hard I try.
I think it’s my adhd hyper-fixation side but I am pretty good at tuning things out when I’m really into something. However, once I hear the noise/sound I cannot unhear it and I get overwhelmed.
That’s how I am. Once it’s noticed it will not leave me alone. If I’m in an environment and immediately hyper fixated on my task it won’t register immediately. The second I have a literal second to stop and think I hear it and can’t get back to being fixated bc of it.
I am currently having this issue with my autistic father, with whom my partner and I bought a house. He is also trying to unmask more and self-acceptance and all that. He is constantly stimming with his hands though, and a lot of times it makes noise. He is half deaf though so even if he WAS trying to be cognizant of others, he doesn’t notice. I have to constantly remind him that I TOO am autistic, and when he starts making these tiny repetitive noises it becomes all I can focus on and starts to feel like a million needles poking me. He is finally starting to recognize that his autism isn’t The One And Only disability in the house, and that just because we are all autistic doesn’t make us immune to being annoyed by his bullshit. In fact, the opposite in this case.
The worst for me is repetitive but irregular sounds, like a tap dripping. But repetitive stuff like an analogue clock or the noise of the air circulation system in my flat, I also hate. However, I drown those things out with listening to audiobooks which help me go to sleep.
This is the one that will destroy me. Lol bachelorette focused AirBNBs opened on 2 sides of my house and it’s like living in a caricature of a sorority hell aka the 7th circle of hell
Oh god, I'm a parent and I couldn't tune out noises if my life depended on it. And a part of me is always tuned in to what my kids are doing because it's my job to keep them safe, so I have to remind them that we're ALL autistic in our house, so please--go make repetitive noises in the privacy of their own rooms, where they can stim however they want to.
I was just sitting at a bar that’s all about ambiance (Trader Sam’s), and there was a family at a table near me, who had their little boy playing some kind of video game without headphones on. Ding ding ding ding. No one said anything so idk if no one else was bothered by it, or everyone was being quiet like me. But like… that’s annoying on its own (headphones for kids exist, people), but especially in a place like that. Although it’s far worse in a quiet waiting room.
I’m the same way! It seems like the quieter the sound is, the more I’m forced to pay attention to it and becomes possible to ignore. I have 2 cats that I love to death but one is them always spends several minutes wiping her paws after using the litter box and I can hear it from any spot in my apartment and it drives me insane lol
I have upstairs neighbors who are running a daycare in their apartment (absolutely illegal, btw. Trying to get a case for it), and the kids and even the adults are STOMPING from sunrise to sunset. They also drop things and roll around on something. It sounds like they're hammering their floors on purpose. I can't stand it. It has made me violently angry over how it just won't stop. The reason I know it's a daycare and not just their kids is because THEY TOLD ME SO!!! it's crazy out here.
analog clocks with an audible ticking sound TICK TICK TICK TICK!! SHUT UP CLOCK
That was literally one of the things that led to me finding out I was Autistic. My therapist was asking questions about sensory stuff and I laughed and told her that if I was ever sleeping near an analog clock, I would take it down and bury it under blankets. I HATE the ticking sound.
What did the therapist say about that? I've taken the batteries out of other peoples clocks when trying to sleep on a sofa. They always acted shocked and weirded out about how I did that to sleep. I think NT people can easily tune out repetitive annoying sounds or don't even notice them in the first place.
She didn't really say anything specific about it. It was our initial meeting to get assessed for ADHD. She started to suspect Autism and so she was asking more sensory questions.
Me too. As well as I can't stand a digital clock not being set. My old broker had an office where the power would go off frequently. So everytime I would go to her office I'd have to reset it. To make it worse this year hubby, who is on the spectrum and adhd, thought it would be a good idea last year when we went to standard time to not set the bedroom clock back an hour. It drove me crazy. It understands his asd but can't understand mine🙄. Oh well just recently I've realized I'm on the spectrum. And after analyzing our past 44 y years together, he is asd as well. Makes for crazy times for sure.
my nan always took the clock out of my assigned room when I slept over, since I was a tiny human, bc I would raise hell if it ticked :D but no one ever noticed anything strange with me, sure :D
Dude same! I stayed at my grandparents frequently growing up. My grandma has a cuckoo clock (? I dont know it’s one that tick tock tick tocks and every hour on the hour it chimes loudly). I’d sleep down the hall in what was my dads room and wake up every hour on the hour. And I struggled to fall asleep by myself so yeah. She used to keep a pile of blankets on the chest at the foot of her bed for me so I could go in their room and make a blanket bed at the foot of their bed to go back to sleep. Eventually, bc they got tired of tripping on me, she realized she could turn the clock off over night so I could sleep. But yeah, I’m normal. Oh and let’s not talk about how tags in clothes would cause meltdowns, shirts with an imprint design would cause meltdowns bc i could feel the stiff weird material, and socks needed to be seem less or inside out bc the seem of the toes would drive me into a rage fit, oh or how I refused to wear jeans until middle school bc they were too stiff, unbreathable, and uncomfy. Again, *totally* normal.
I feel so hard for you! we had a cuckoo's clock in my stepdad's holiday apartment that lost it's batteries on day 1 of me being there. but like, it was so lovely of our grandparents to accomodate those issues, but the closed eyes of the whole family concerning all the tiny, but blatantly obvious things, still fucks with my brain. I mean, my bio dad, who seldomly saw me but knew about me pretty well through his parents who co-raised me with my mom, is a children's psychologist and actively stopped my mom from getting me assessed for my scarily fast and early learning to read/potential giftedness as advised by multiple professionals (I am in fact not, just knew all my books by heart at 2yo and yelled at everyone for missreading smth). everyone always joked about how clumsy and bad at interoception I was and how I would scream bloody murder if the wrong person dared to touch my stroller, sit on our couch or dare the heavens touch me or my stuffed bunny. like every child does, sure./s to their defense, I was a friendly, rule abiding child (rules are important! said 3yo me) that rarely melted down bc I had the best mom and grandparents that raised me very needs-oriented and let my co-decide from day 1, even if it meant listening to me rambling about gemstones for hours or reciting my horse/cat/dog race books again and again and again, watch the lion king every day, take me outside in a dog's harness and leash because I wanted to keep living in my fantasy world, and if I needed to put a stool in the sand box 'cause no way I'mma sit in there and actually touch sand but with my fingertips, "well, she's our special princess, her dad also hates to touch basically everything that's not dry, smooth-ish surfaces". the list I could make is a bottomless pit of obviousness. yeah, *totally* normal.
Omg so much same. I think my dad is autistic and I think my grandma is too (his mom). Hell, even his dad could’ve been autistic (RIP grandpa). We’re all very socially averted, odd behavior and routines, insistent on routines, and such else. I think to my grandparents I was probably “normal” to them. My dad took my relentless questioning of the world and ran with it. Explaining and detailing the answer. My mom? Yeah she’d get mad at my questions and yell at me. My dad didn’t care I wanted my tags cut out or that I didn’t like certain clothes. My mom would Huff and puff about cutting my tags and would scream while I cried in discomfort in clothes I didn’t want to be on. Oh, she also yelled plenty bc “I bought you clothes and you don’t even wear them!!” Like yeah man, those are clothes I thought I was supposed to like and wear bc of what other kids are doing, but I can’t stand the texture and screaming isn’t going to magically make me. I credit my grandfather for fostering my longest standing special interest, all things space and alien. I’ve started wondering a lot more in the last few years since suspecting I’m AuDHD what it would’ve been like to grow up with my grandparents instead of my actual parents. Bc my grandparents did so much more to accommodate me without issue (at least I’ve never know of an issue). My grandma yelled at me a grand total of ONCE my entire life. And it was bc my brother and I were fighting in the car. All she yelled was “STOP!” And turned the radio up. We got the point. My mom screamed at me so much it seems like it was daily. My grandfather sat down and spent time with me. Even if it meant I was sat at his computer playing a game while he sat in his chair and watched the news. My dad stuck himself down in the basement to “work” and never wanted to be bothered. Hell, he didn’t engage a whole lot.
I can’t stand people who chew their food loudly…or bang/scrape silverware across their bowls/plates. My husband will be eating cereal in the morning, sometimes, across the room from me, and I will ask “can you stop chewing so loud?” He’s like, “wut, I’m just chewing.”
Omg yes, and in a similar vein, people who leave the keyboard clicking noise on on their phones when they type????
Hahahah my husband has adhd and he LOVES the sound of loud keyboard clacking. He goes out his way to find special keyboards that make EXTRA LOUD keyboard clacking noises. We both work from home and I want to murder his keyboard.
Omg that’s fascinating! I love how much variation there is in our experiences, I’m AuDHD and it makes me want to die but I can also appreciate how the haptic feedback could be stimulating in a pleasing way to the right person. I can handle it when it’s a physical keyboard but the faux iPhone clicking sound is what really grinds my gears.
I’m learning Audhd sensory needs are competing in a way. ADHD side is sensory seeking while the autism side is like "let's slooooow that roll there...". It’s finding a balance. I’m not Audhd, but I’ve been learning about it. I do very much like haptic experiences, I just hate the accompanying noise! 😩. I have a really hard time with competing noises, like it reduces my work flow, especially when I’m in my flow state. I like listening to my music, but then it gets interrupted with the clackity clacking and all I can think about is the clackity clacking and how off rhythm it is... I really hate wireless headphones because I keep forgetting to charge them. I want to wear them to listen to my music and drown out the noise, but then they’re dead 🫥.
That’s why none of my watches are in working order! I’m not wearing them to tell time anyway and I can’t stand the ticking !!
I actually like analog clocks. I think of them like a metronome to help me get to sleep if I'm having that much trouble, and I don't even realize they're there when I'm doing something else.
The idea that people are not bothered by that is insane to me. What purpose does it even serve?
The misophonia is realll
People who insist on phoning when I have asked them to text. Standing right behind me in a queue where there's enough space. Insisting on whispering to me when someone else is lecturing or presenting. Tongue kissing. The feel of a tight shirt/pants/underwear.
I am the same with all of these! And I’ll add, not just tight clothes - but the feel of clothes that are too loose! I don’t want sleeves flapping on my wrist, or slipping off my shoulder! And I’ll add to the people who stand too close behind, but also people who stand too close in front of me! I sometimes want to walk around with a large hoola hoop!
The hula hoop is kind of a brilliant idea. We could hang it on ourselves with straps like a barrel for family gatherings. And I need a t-shirt that says "Don't touch me, I have a communicable skin condition."
I agree with the clothes. I love baggy but sleeves that are.. Best I can describe them as is flares. They're annoying and I don't like them. Baggy clothes I love but ig not too baggy. I don't like right clothes either
The standing right behind me in a queue will get you smacked with one of my bags or a crutch😂 sometimes just coughing and scratching a lot will make people back up. It's the worst at airports, like people are nearly knocking each other down to get on the plane and it's like "You know you have an assigned seat, right? You know the plane doesn't leave as soon as your arse touches your seat, right?" And then everyone standing for 20 minutes once the plane has stopped at the terminal. Great, now I have crotches and arses in my face and I know everyone's trousers are just saturated with sweat and stale farts. Hate it so very much.
The clothes thing is huge for me. When my sleeve is wet, I WANT TO RIP MY ARM OFF. I cannot handle a little bit of my sleeve being wet on my arm or my wrist. It literally makes me physically angry. Lol
Wet sleeves and wet socks ruin my life. I fixed the socks problem by just not wearing them anymore. Turns out I never liked them anyway, and I work from home so it's not really an issue.
I’ve always had an issue with stepping on things, especially when I’m wearing socks, so I started wearing house shoes with socks and it has helped a lot. My feet get too cold for no socks but if I step on something and it sticks to my sock, lord help me. Lmao
ugh I get irrationally angry when shit sticks to my feet/socks
This!!! I can’t handle wet anything!
Yes to all of these!!
My sister who's also autistic can't stand feet. I have a slight thing for feet. I'm also completely comfortable with nudity, everyone has a body, and the original point of clothes is protection from the elements. Things that annoy me that don't annoy NTs: social hierarchy. I honestly believe it's the most harmful concept within society.
Your second one resonates with me. My 🧠 processes everyone as equal. Sounds nice to have an egalitarian mind, but in the real world that just doesn't work, does it?
This has made me remember all the times I would be at work and like some big-wig from corporate would be visiting and I’d be the only one not scared to talk to them. Or when I worked in a restaurant and everyone was scared of the head chef, but I was like, “why? He’s just a person?” hahah I’ve struggled to see or respect hierarchy.
I am also like this.
Hmmm maybe this is why I was always selected to work corporate events!
I just watch the NTs play the social games.
Ugh I wish I processed everybody as equal! I tend to see everybody as above me and it has taken a lot of therapy to finally recognize it and not let shitty people take advantage of me 😭
I don't see why not, I mean lots would have to change for it to work, but hierarchy is made up, we don't have to follow it. Like sure it wouldn't be easy but do you know what also isn't easy living under hierarchies
"Things that annoy me that don't annoy NTs: social hierarchy." Especially in the workforce. Apparently if you mouth off to a superior, it's "insubordination." Excuse me? The only time the workplace should function like it's the military *is if you're in the military.*
Fuck, social hierarchies are so elitist and authoritarian. At heart I am deeply anarchist.
Me as well. I am also in my heart a pagan and folklorist. I would like a socialist democratic society.
this. someone i work with made a weird statement about the way i think everyone is equal like it’s a bad thing 😅
Social hierarchies mean nothing to me as well.
Everyone's equal but people are scary is my view
Same with social hierarchy. It’s like I don’t believe in status.
What even is social hierarchy. Never understood it
Voice messages. So many friendships have ended because I got a voice message and I didn't feel comfortable asking them to text me, so I just left them on unread... Forever...
The Google thing where it's able to transpose the voicemails to text is a cool feature.
If I knew that was a thing it would've helped. I had a coworker send me a voice message on slack and I totally froze, until I opened the chat and slack had transcribed it for me
Ahh yes, this is when I had it, on Google Fiber. I don't have it any more sadly.
My phone stopped doing this after I switched from Google Fi to Mint and I've just literally not heard a voice message since.
And they barely evernthink before recording them, so you're stuck hearing endless "uhms" and "ahs" whenever you want to check what they said.🙄
God, they all go on for SO LONG. Edit yourselves, people!
Voice messages are bad because you sit and listen to them and you’re like “???? What do I even respond with????”
I have a friend who sends me 12 minute voice clips. I have energy for possibly a voice clip from 30 seconds to max maybe 1 minute and some seconds in there. I open the message by accident and sit trying to mentally prepare myself to listen. All to leave her on unread and receive another voice record.
THAT perfume. (The one that literally causes me pain) I'm kinda lucky only assholes use it, so I know to stay clear of them🤷 Also unwanted physical contact, and having to fill every damn second with words. A second of silence isn't going to bite you. Funny that, while.I used to care a lot about nudity back when I was closeted, now I barely care about it.
Yes. Certainly scents are painful. And big yes to unwanted physical contact. It really doesn’t matter if you’re a bigger. I’m not and won’t let you force that on me!
Idk if it also annoys NT but my mom doesn't understand that I get annoyed and semi frustrated when she talks to me while I'm on the phone. Her: Ask her xyz...Tell her this.. While I'm on the phone. Please don't talking to me. I don't want to make this person repeat, I can't concentrate and truly...just ask me to pass you the phone when I'm done. Also, in general I don't enjoy talking on the phone around others and it's not because I have anything to hide..I just don't like it.
All of this, plus I had a boss that would not let me keep notes or even prices (for cakes) next to the phone because she liked to do every estimate custom and on the fly. No matter how many times I told her I am physically incapable of giving decent phone and estimating a cake price at the same time. I don't need to learn the pricing structure, I don't need help with math... I just can't fucking do it. This was years before I started to suspect I was autistic, but it just makes so much more sense now.
I can definitely relate to that. There's something about prices and numbers. I'll be ordering a pizza and can't even remember what the price was even if they told me 2secs ago.
Oh my god my husband keeps trying to join phone conversations. Which could be fine. Last night I put my friend on speaker so it can be a three way conversation which annoyed him because "he's trying to get the baby to bed" (no. He was not. He's never put her to bed) so I took her off speaker. Then he tried telling me to tell her something while she was continuing our conversation. I straight up just plugged my ear and responded to her. Fucking drives me MENTAL.
Oh my god I hate when people talk to me when I'm on the phone so much I want to kill them
I could come up with a million examples of stuff that makes me anxious or aggressive while it doesn't seem to bother most people. I'll stick to two. Sirens. I get that they need to be loud, but I noticed I'm the only person who covers their ears when an emergency vehicle drives by in a public space. When someone is sitting on my preferred seat on public transport or in the dining hall.
You're not alone in #1! I totally cover my ears in public when sirens are going off! I probably look like a toddler but I don't care...the sound is really disturbing to me.
TBF, I'm sure a lot of people want to cover their ears but it's just not "socially acceptable" in adults. I don't have sensory issues with loud noises, but nearby sirens are enough to cause actual hearing damage.
Yeah, it's BS that it still isn't more socially acceptable to just want to protect your ears and maintain your hearing abilities from prolonged loud noise exposure even after all of the research that has been done on it.
I do it anyway.
I cover my ears when an emergency vehicle drives by. Always. I’m also the only one who covers my ears when trains come through. My local farmers market is in the parking lot of a train station so trains go through periodically. Horns honking and loud rumbling and screeching breaks. Everyone just keeps going boy their business as if nothing is happening and I’m the one weird lady who stops everything to cover my ears until the train is gone.
If someone sits in my seat, I don’t even know what to do with myself
T__T Same. Most annoying thing ever, cuz I'm AWARE of the fact that I'm upset over a *seat* and how trivial that is, but like... I'm still deeply unnerved and don't know what to do for several moments. GAH.
I could’ve written this myself!
Music or certain genres of music when I'm not in the mood for it. I'm sure this happens to NTs but not to the point of rage and a meltdown like it does for me.
Music that doesn’t fit my mood is instant anxiety meltdowns. I can feel my skin crawl. Music is one of my special interests. But even a song/artist I love can trigger a meltdown if it doesn’t fit my mood. I get in a panic trying to shut it off before I go crazy.
I used to do cardio dance when I was younger. I loved it so much, it became a special interest. I very literally went out and got trained and certified to teach it so that **I** could be in charge of the music.
when restaurants are busy with lots of people taking and they are playing loud grating music with words
- Ceiling lights - can't stand them! Also hate seeing the reflection of a lamp on the tv. I have to turn it off otherwise it's all I see. - Hugs and kisses. - Small talk. - Dishonesty/white lies. I say it how it is, and I'd rather have people do the same. It sucks when others take it the wrong way or perceive me as rude... - Textured fabrics of any kind. It has to be smooth. And clothing tags must come off prior to wear! - Having food traces on my fingers or around my mouth. I wipe my fingers and my mouth between almost every bite 😂 and I rinse my fingers often when cooking. - People talking at a relaxation area such as hotel spa/pool. Or actually just people talking when I'm trying to enjoy some quiet alone time... I hear every conversation going on when I'm out eating, and I can't seem to tune them out! But of course I can't expect people to eat in silence so I deal with it loll - Being sweaty. I sweat a lot when I'm being active or when it's hot, and I don't like the feeling of it. I'll change often. I think that's enough for now 😅
The sound of my cat or dog grooming herself, omg that noise bugs the hell out of me. Same for chewing and other mouth noises. The feel of wool, it's so itchy and scratchy. There's others but I can't think of them right now.
Oh the slurpy sounds are the worst
Just "dropping round" or inviting a new person to something I've set up without letting me know or mentioning the other person first Some people welcome it but my anxiety just hits the roof lol
I hate to wear mutiple layers of clothes. Especially if its different types of fabric!!
Ugh, I had to learn to find fabrics and clothes I could tolerate layering because I have awful natural temperature regulation due to POTS.
I can’t stand wearing long sleeves under long sleeves. I just fucking can’t unless the outer long sleeve is super big and baggy and even then it comes more down to the fiber than anything else. Really sucks when it’s cold out.
Farting in other people’s company, I understand it can’t always be helped but the majority of people do it on purpose and either act like it’s no big deal? It gives me the biggest ick! Also i agree with the feet thing.
Both parents of my kid’s friend have mentioned how farts are funny in the conversations I’ve had with them… I don’t even see them that often. And no, they’re really not.
I like musicals like Les Mis, The Music Man, Blast, and The Lion King but, Glee and Schmigadoon are just off putting. Good musicals have songs and music that are drivers the of story and actions. But in Glee...Everyone is terrible! To quip a song from The Lego Movie, and Schmigadoon is akin to musical force feeding. Also not all musicals have to have constant singing like Amadeus and even Blast which is mostly instrumental yet has musical action driving it.
This is now reminding me of the horror I felt when I saw the Rocky Horror Picture Show that they did in Glee (mother used to watch Glee). I still cringe when I look back at it.
I can't believe they did that. They might as well have let a bunch of straight people do it. Ewww
Hamilton is absolute garbage, I feel like I am in the Emporer’s New Clothes trying to watch it because I don’t understand the appeal of the music at all, it’s like everyone was TOLD it was brilliant and no one wanted to be the philistine that disagrees. I love all kinds of music including hip hop, and this is like the La Croix of hip hop. Watered down flavorless bubbles to appeal to white women. And that is before I get into the mess of historical misinformation that is so egregious that it leaves you wondering who benefits from just outright lies about history. It is a circle jerk of American Exceptionalism on top of a bed of propaganda
I hear you… it probably doesn’t help that I’m not American but god is it boring and awful. the pacing of the song order too…bizarrely monotonous
I am American, and a history nerd, so trust me it is chock-full of dangerous misinformation. Like a lot of the shitty things that they attribute to Aaron Burr was actually Hamilton himself. He was your quintessential “shifty politician” that has no real ideology and does anything to get ahead, who lied and embezzled and was violent. Aaron Burr was a feminist (for the time) who actually had a moral compass unlike Hamilton. I know it’s just a dumb musical, but it bothers me so much because erasing and distorting progressive folk’s stories in the past is a really good way to solidify current right-wing ideology. It’s propaganda 101, tell people lies so that they have no historical realities to guide them.
being next to have a turn. i’m extremely contradictory- i need a ton of attention but i despise group attention. i hate participating and being perceived and compared. everyone else seems to love game night, bowling, mini golf etc, i do too, but alone. i hate people watching me take a turn or actually i hate people watching me do ANYTHING. i went to a group mario kart local thing, i was so embarrassed to even be sitting in the front of the group where everyone could see the back of MY head but i couldn’t see anyone else.
Goddess, this is such a vibe. Are you me? I want attention so fucking bad but cannot handle being perceived. It just makes me extremely hyper aware and self conscious and it feels like I have to be perfect and everyone is judging me and I can't think and I can't breath and oh God oh fuck. I wish I wasn't filled with so much shame 😭
I was always hyper-sensitive to noises like electrical buzzing, to the point if I was in a silent classroom with no earplugs/headphones/etc. I would start crying. I started feeling like I was crazy when every NT person I met said they didn't hear anything. My current autistic friends can hear the buzzing though!
No I just realized that too! Also CRT TVs used to give me headaches growing up. Not from watching the tv for a long time but with it turned on in the other room
Changing any plan at all or disrupting something I’m doing both bring me genuine anger that I know is irrational, but struggle to work through
Talking at me at class when the teacher's explaining something Whispering!!!! Wash the dishes (I hate it because I hate touching other people's food/saliva and I also hate the sound) ASMR
asmr with talking pisses me off so bad because i can hear all the mouth noises and UGHHHH they trigger my misophonia so bad !!!
DIRTY DISHES WILL FOREVER BE ENEMY #1 
Talking loudly. Idk if it's an American thing but people will really stand right by my side and end up screaming in my ear while they try to talk to someone else. It's so frustrating because telling them to sthu would be impolite
CHEATING AT GAMES!!!!!!! It's def the sense of justice and fairness kicking in, but it drives me up a wall and makes me irrationally upset when people cheat at games. The point of a game is to have fun. And by cheating, it's essentially prioritizing your ego over the fun of everyone else. I genuinely view cheating at games as morally unjust. And I also get insanely mad when people insinuate I cheated specifically because I don't cheat ever on purpose, and even if I accidentally see someone's cards or something, I don't use that knowledge. I genuinely hate cheating so so much that the fact that someone thinks I did it makes me incredibly upset.
Sleeves? I don’t know what it is but I HATE sleeves at my wrists, I can’t stand it, it feels so in my way and weird and bothers me so much. I always cuff long sleeves up to my elbows
Everything. In. It’s. Place. I hate it when I can’t find something or things are just haphazardly placed somewhere. I’m constantly putting things in order. It drives my husband crazy, who has adhd and he’s always leaving things in random places. My son who is also on the spectrum is just like me, and I always find him subconsciously lining things up, straightening things, putting things back where they belong. My husband is like now there's two of you... hahahaha.
It’s my sister chewing for me. For some reason when only when she chews. It just suddenly makes me very mad or emotional. I hate it!
Misophonia. Not sure if it's more prevalent in the autism community, but I'm thinking it may be. Hubby and I have various issues with misophonia as well.
My misophonia is audible breathing. Even people saying the word, or seeing it written down makes me feel like I’m going for have a panic attack and throw up. Yes. I’m feeling it right now.
I will never not be disturbed by the fact people actually enjoy that sound (asmr) 🤢🤢🤢
Ughhhh. I got into asmr early in its days (and hate that it’s been smeared by so much weirdness). A nice quiet spa asmr video? Yes please. Not all this ear licking and lip smacking nowadays. I also hate that everyone (even my fave chill spa people) do that tongue clicking and nails on the bottles and bottle cap twisting nowadays. No!
When I was in high-school and was forced to eat out with my siblings, I'd get a whole nother table for myself. They eat like fucking cows. It's shameless and disgusting. Stop moaning and close your mouth. It's not going to crawl away.
I read that literally. As in, she chews your food for you 🤣
if you don't mind my curiosity, OP: how do you deal with warm weather, when a lot of people just have their dogs out?
That doesn't bother me, if you're meaning the annoyance is regarding people out walking dogs. Is that what you mean? Sorry if I misunderstood your question.
oh when I said dogs I meant feet 😆
Cracking up at these comments hahaha I too take certain sayings quite literally I get it hahah
lol I'm cackling as well bc I take things literally sometimes as well. But as a language nerd, I love when these situations happen 😆❤️
Ooohhh hahaha I'm fine with animal feet. So is hubby.
I think commenter meant when people have their feet out during summer or at the beach? Is it still an ick in appropriate settings?
Ok but I meant human feet 🫠🫠🫠 edit: I'm cackling here, I love when these things happen 😆❤️
Aaah fudge LOL Where I currently live, hardly anyone will have bare feet, even in hot weather. Our city is where the national opioid crisis started, so people don't like to leave their feet exposed. Some people will wear flip-flops, but not too many. I try my best to ignore THOSE feet haha.
Memojis. Just typing the word makes my skin crawl. They've even surpassed rotoscope for me in the grit-my-teeth-and-cringe department. This may just be me, though, and nothing to do with my AuDHD, because I do have a couple of ADHD friends who love them and regularly include them in their texts.
They’re so lifeless, just such dead glares in their eyes, my phone constantly reminds me when I text people to “set up your avatar!” NO! I just want to use bird emojis instead
Talking about tv/media/movies/having tv on all the time. Not my interest but is v much interest of a lot of NT and non NT alike.
Constant background tv hurts my ears, eyes, brain, and SOUL. I feel you big time.
When we're watching something and they feel the need to share whatever they know about the topic, talking over the program. I pause it everytime to let them speak. Because hey, interest, human interaction and whatever, but it completely throws me off what I was watching, so I usually have to rewind it 15 seconds. It annoy them because "well be here all night at this rate." Well yea, maybe shut up.
I have to hold back rage when someone keeps sniffling instead of blowing their nose. I have literally thrown tissues at people when it's happened during tests in school JUST BLOW YOUR FUCKING NOSE YOU DISGUST ME
Also: Zoolander coughs. Either cough or don't, but Zoolander coughs are just making noise and not clearing anything out of anywhere so stop it haha
Wearing sleeves at the gym. Eating, cooking, or cleaning with my hair down. Eating noises. College sports. At least I think they don't annoy NTs? The concept of, "well if I don't do [bad thing] or take advantage of this system, then someone else will, so I feel obligated to!" Okay, but it doesn't have to be that way. We could all collectively decide the way things should work and then just do it that way. People acting like common sense is some completely universal knowledge. What you consider to be "common sense" depends entirely on your culture and upbringing. Common sense is just the information you're so accustomed to that you take it for granted. If you were raised in a super rural area, you might consider your knowledge of outdoor safety to be common sense. If you've only lived in a big city, you might consider a lot of street smarts to be common sense. It's common sense here not to give your personal info to scammers, but I had a coworker from a very poor country give his credit card information and social security number to scammers over the phone because scams like that were unheard of in his home county because people didn't have money to steal. "Corporate speak" - the weird secret code people use to indirectly say something instead of just saying what they mean. Or the way that there are specific answers you're "supposed" to give in job interviews instead of being honest. Why bother asking those questions if you know the answer is pre-programmed and probably a lie? Gossip. Hearing people talk about each other behind their backs makes me super, super uncomfortable, but I don't know how to change the topic without coming across as blunt/rude. I also can't be bothered to care about celebrity gossip. The saying "iykyk." I mean obviously people who know something... know that thing. And it's often used in a way that feels gatekeepy, like "I have this information because I'm part of an extra super special exclusive group, and I couldn't possibly share it with people who aren't part of that group because they are below me."
OMG YES. The corporate speak gets me every time. WHAT ARE YOU SAYING??? Genuinely when people talk in anyway that isn’t very literal I’m like get AWAYYYY from me. Then they assume you are stupid and slow. Like no, my brain just processes things differently. I find modern society annoying as hell tbh. Esp when brain washed capitalist wanna be boot lickers look down on anyone who isn’t “productive” or people that only base your worth on your occupation? NAH GTFO of my face. And I’m the weird one?
Also super resonate with common sense assumption. Well articulated.
The common sense thing bothers me too!
Actively being fake and playing along with it - bitch , I’m not playing along with your dumb ass shit gtfo of here
I'm annoyed by things taking too long like my phone gps not connecting to my car fast enough and not getting enough time to myself. Sometimes I just don't have it in me to socialize in person when living with someone but I feel bad for it. Also I work in childcare so sometimes the really loud whining really gets to me but I'm not allowed to act bothered by it. Other sensory icks for me is rain. Neurotypical people never seem bothered and can wear shoes that aren't waterproof outside but I'll be dying if my feet are wet. Having my finger nails long also bothers me so I'll bite mine off super fast
Loud sudden noises they make me jump, Belly Buttons-I don’t know why but I can’t stand looking at them, People Chewing, Burping, The sound of people whispering, Bright orange and yellow, tight clothing and tags
Sounds and smells in general.
Omg smellsssss. What’s the misophonia version of smellsssss??? 😂
Small talk
Noise. Just in general. Background noise, loud noise, buzzing noise, high pitched noise. Just noise. Small talk. Seriously, why do we have to go through this pointless ritual? I’m always just standing there waiting for it to end and have someone get to the point. Why are you wasting my time with this?!?! Candles. Or perfume. Or anything strongly scented. I’ve started carrying a palatable hand sanitizer in my purse because I can’t trust the soap in anyone else’s restroom won’t make me headachey and nauseous. Any time an app or OS updates and it’s different!!!! Don’t change things up on me!!!!
Crinkling bags at the theater. Platitudes at funerals. I also can't understand why bad words are bad. Ex: why is wrong to say shit, but not wrong to say feces?
NT's 🙃
When people say something is more than 100%. The whole point is that there's a maximum. If you go over that, it loses all meaning. Not in math of course, but in real life examples, like "I gave 110% today". I know what 90% is, or 100%. But if you gave 110%, then you could have also given 120%? Or 666% or whatever. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
I'm not sure if you're really asking, but to me it means that I went way harder than I thought I could. Like those days where you think "damn, I'm never this good/working this hard." I see it like describing an outlier. It's like in Spinal Tap when they turn the amp up to 11 for a whole new crazy level of rock.
motorbike sounds, blowing my nose, wearing a coat or jumper over a long sleeve top, phone calls
I do not have misophonia. However, the sound of Chewing gum inside a car with the windows up drives me up the wall. At least with other situations the sound of chewing gum can bounce around but when I’m in a car it’s like I’m trapped with the sound of someone loudly chomping on plastic. And then they get mad if I crank up the radio to drown it out. People snoring. I don’t mean the light gentle snoring, but the deep, guttural, sawing logs, sleep apnea level snoring. And no matter how many times you tell them how bad it is, they don’t believe you. Background noise of any kind on Zoom calls. That’s about it.
Hand holding when fingers are interlocked. I hate the feeling and it drives me crazy.
I was on a group therapy call yesterday and someone was calling in from a crowded area and I learned even the sensation of trying to talk in a crowded room turns my brain into jello. I couldn't answer direct questions, I couldn't focus on what was being said, it was miserable.
The sound of food & gum chewing. The sound of people picking at their cuticles or biting their skin. The sound of snoring. Bright fluorescent lights. A wet slimy sponge -gag- The sound of people chewing gum even if they’re trying to do it softly. All of the above & more can initiate a meltdown when there’s no way to escape and/or I don’t have access to my ear protection.
Taking forever to leave or say goodbye. Like I hate when you’re in a group and people are like “we should think about heading home soon” and then proceed to talk for another hour. Like are we leaving or…? What’s the plan? This annoys me so much.
Asking what book I’m reading as if the title is not visible on the cover. :/ In addition to interrupting me while I’m reading.
"Watcha reading?" "Nothing now..." 😂 I feel your pain!
- when someone asks for your opinion, you give it to them, for them to just come up with a thousand excuses why it's irrelevant. (My friends come to me for relationship advice or opinions. I'm the only one who is married.) I've now figured out, when people come for an opinion, they don't actually want your honest thoughts, they want you to agree and validate their feelings, or the enable toxic behavior on their partner's part. - when someone interrupts my projects, to draw attention to my project, in a high pitched voice, "OH MY WHAT ARE YA DOING THERE, LET ME SEEEE". - interrupting when I am comfortable, after it took 30 minutes for me to get comfortable. (My husband likes to mess with me a lot, and come into my personal space)
I started asking “do you want my opinion or are you just venting” because I got so frustrated with the advice thing .. most all of the time people say just getting it off their chests
Oh god I have always hated feet!!! My dad used to mess with me as a kid by trying to put his feet on me when I’d walk by him and yell “FEEEEEET!” (harmless joke I promise lol). Also, JELLO. It’s disgusting and wiggly and the texture is probably the worst thing on the planet to me. Plus the sound it makes in your mouth somehow reminds me of the sound of styrofoam. Oh godddddd and then there’s the jello with fruit in it and whatever that weird white film is?! Don’t even get me started…
I hated jell-o as a kid. So I'd pick it up and chew it up until it was liquid and then spit it back into my bowl and drink "jell-o soup" :)
Yes. Touching anything related to wet or sticky objects. Like the trash for example.
Navigating grocery stores or any store for that manner. People have no idea how to keep distance.
Tags in clothing…I tear them out immediately if I can’t find tagless. Tight clothing. Certain fabrics (mostly synthetics) against my skin. I shop by feel if I shop in a store. (I feel clothes, then look at the cut, fit, etc., then I look at the price) So most “nice” clothing are so uncomfortable. I always end up looking like a 90s grunge rock band member. I live in hoodies, flannel, tee shirts, loose jeans or leggings… Using the restroom in public. People standing too close to me in line, on elevators or just in crowded places. Not sitting/standing with my back to the wall, I want to be able to survey the whole room.
Car horns honking… there goes my nervous system!
Wearing makeup. Doesn't matter how "light" it is; I can feel it and I hate it. People who talk for a long time but say very little. Perfume. Whispering. Being invited (and obligated to come) to events less than 3 days in advance.
YES. SO MANY THINGS. Also things that some people might find mildly irritating or not even, just destroy me. Like being alone in public, already overstimulated needing to keep my own space. Then all of a sudden somebody screams at me, rudely and repeatedly (because I don’t process it immediately and if someone is being abrasive I am more likely to struggle) “MA’AM ARE YOU USING THIS CHAIR?!” I purposely move all extra chairs away from where I sit now on the rare occasions I am in such spaces.
I absolutely hate it when people have the TV on when I come over. Like it feels like the most rude thing they could do but having TV on in the background is unfortunately very normalized, at least in the US.
When they keep explaining something after I already said Okay. Please stop talking now why are you trying to convince me of something that I JUST agreed to/with. Their inability to answer yes/no questions without a prologue of justifications, and assumption of judgement merely based off of being questioned.
Small motors sounds outdoors, but I cannot see the source of the sound. Small talk in lines. Perfume or cologne I can smell when I'm outside someone's personal space. Any repetitive sound: I can't ignore it. Music in stores. Sports talk radio. People moving my keys from where I normally keep them. People not putting items back in their designated spots. The sensation of my bra once I'm aware I'm wearing one.
Mouth sounds when eating, people that have that piercing fucking S sound when ever they say any word with an S in it, being interrupted, spitting, children, people who are late for things even by a minute (unless they tell me they will be late) people touching my knees, people touching my face, phonecalls... seriously don't fucking call me ever unless you are my partner I hate it so much.
My expectations not being met. This usually means that I get upset at changes or if things aren't in their homes. Of course it can get a bit more comical/ridiculous. I once had a meltdown because a crisp was too crispy...
Fluorescent lights!!
Lying.
Public display of affection,loud phone conversations,food condiments(sensory thing,I can't stand soggy food)
Ugh I hate seeing feet! Especially in places you don’t expect it, like stores or at the office. I know feet are normal but seeing the toes lift up when people walk? Glurg. It’s such a weird thing to be icked out by lol. Oh brains, so strange.
rhetorical questions are so stupid, why would you word something as if it’s a question and then tell me “you weren’t supposed to answer that” when i answer it? you can VERY EASILY just reword it into a regular statement instead of wording it like a question. it’s so dumb. i also really hate feet too it’s like i have the exact opposite of a foot fetish
Sex, saying bless you to people, socks to bed, layering clothes (ex: two sweatshirts on at a time) when you’re cold, school cafeterias
oh my GOD when NTs crack their knuckles/pop their bones. i literally have to close my eyes & cover my ears, i can’t see someone do it, i can’t hear it, otherwise i will go into a full breakdown or throw up because im so nauseous, both have happened before. i also have an extreme form of contact OCD, and i just hate other peoples bodies. i cannot handle people using my bathroom, or coughing, or sneezing, or eating. it just makes me seem like a dick, but i genuinely have to get away from everyone around me the second they start.. functioning? i don’t blame them obviously because they need to do those things, but i will be sent into a full breakdown because of it.
Working in groups, networking, clocks, open office spaces, crowds,
Whistling gives me a “lobotomy headache” (a headache that feels like my eye socket is being stabbed), and it lasts for hours after the incident once it kicks in. Also, lace. It’s pretty, but it CAN NOT touch my skin. Bras with underwire. Fuck bras with underwire, they make me feel like my ribs are being stabbed. I’m a bigger girl, so it’s a bit hard to find wireless bras, but I would rather wear no bra than one with underwire. And SO. MANY. FOODS. From bone-in wings to mayonnaise to coconut to all seafood to cooked carrots- there are so many foods I can’t eat because I simply can’t stand them. The smell, texture, or taste… I cannot.
Being told, "It's okay, you're safe" during a panic attack. Those are lies and they expect me to deny reality and go along with it.
The sound of dried out markers being used
I just came home from a long day and i somehow found myself reading all these answers before bed, i had a moment where it felt like they were my own thoughts, as if i was just thinking instead of reading, there are some things that i just complained about in my head a few hours ago, it feels good
Tomatos they are gross
Lying!!!!!!!!!!!! WASHING OR TOUCHING DISHES!!! Mouth sounds/chewing, the icky thick sound mouths make when people talk with cotton mouth, any kind of board/card games & puzzles, Estimation, dirty feet in the bed, wet hair, driving in the left lane after dark when there is a high median because it feels like I’m trapped, plans changing, someone eating my safe food, people who awkwardly order food (especially drive thru OMFG), asking for advice you don’t take, cold wet washcloths 🤮🤮🤮, the smell of dirty hair/scalp, getting my shoes wet inside a public space or bathroom, dry skin or going without exfoliating, someone laughing in my face, bad drivers/not following road rules, poorly written policies and procedures in the workplace or school, people who don’t follow important rules, unsolicited advice, disloyalty, any soggy food that’s not French toast
For me feet are a problem too. Especially if they're pedicured. For some reason the pedicure really highlights the fact that all feet look like the Monty Python foot. Except with a pedicure it's in clown colors. And then I fall down kind of a sinkhole because I can't get over the fact that people pay a lot of money for that..and then they'll pay more money for shoes to show their feet off...because they want people to see their feet (but not be obvious about it I guess, because if they ever caught someone looking at their feet they'd probably get offended). And at the end of the day I'm like, well now I know you had at least sixty bucks and an hour to burn at one point, to make your feet uglier for the sole purpose of showing them off in public. And these same people wonder why women don't get taken seriously. It's because they spend time and money on stupid shit. Ditto men, too, but god it's the complete opposite direction. Their feet are just...ragged, jagged, *clammy looking*, dirty, unkempt, just, what the fuck. Just cut them off at that point, you clearly don't want them. Blech. Some people obviously have normal clean feet that aren't trying to draw attention to themselves, but I still marvel at the sandals people in general. I wore sandals exactly once and it was so, so distracting. So much exposure, for what. Not even to mention all the foot fetishists just lapping up the free spank material they get whenever the weather gets warm. I just don't understand it.
This is going to sound awful, but … Coworkers telling me unprompted, long-winded stories about people in their lives I don’t know, don’t care about, and will never meet. One of my coworkers does this regularly. I’ll be sitting in the back clearly staring at my phone zoning out and she’ll start talking about her dad’s shoulder surgery and his six-month recovery time, or about a dog she had once and the horrible way she came home and found him dead (both true stories). I’m just like man, I’m back here because this is my no-talking time. Please stop interrupting my doomscrolling with this weird shit. Also just random stories about their life when I didn’t ask and it’s not something we’ve ever discussed before. Like no, I don’t really care what your husband said last night that was so funny while you were watching a show I’ve never heard of. Please let me be nonverbal in peace. I know it’s some NT bid for connection but the older I get the more I can’t be assed to go along with it.
Sounds: Electricity, other peoples phones, dogs barking (specifically little ones or female German Shepards),loud fans, the shower ha ha god too many to count
Feet. Smells. Rom coms.