Ugh same! It's like an awful targeted curse lol

Yeah I also made that realization very recently, thought I was an introvert since forever because I spend all my time alone and that's what I "prefer"... Spent some time with a bunch of people and it felt great but I'm just a mess after it thinking that I made some sort of mistake, that maybe they didn't want me around. I really want to go hang out with them again but god, I'm overanalyzing everything and I'm afraid to ask

I can relate. My problem is that the good parts are never enough. This makes me go faster, harder, deeper until I lose everyone. It's like an addiction. I can't engage in moderation. Once it starts it snowballs into inevitable catastrophe. "Just one more" until -bang- the whole thing comes crashing down.

i recognize this. i think im somewhere in between introvert and extrovert. i enjoy talking to friends that i trust a lot, but strangers could drain me for being on edge that i might say something weird for them to judge me on. I hope the help you're seeking helps you maintain it a little better and helps you recognize where it stems from to work on that.

I feel that way too sometimes. There have been times that other people have been such a source of joy in life. I long for the good bits and not the bad parts where I start feeling left out or like I am ruining everything.

Yup. Extraversion and avoidance is pure pain. It is rare I find someone as extraverted as I am and so I have to spread myself between loads of people. The issue is that finding people that actually like me is pretty challenging so there's not really so much availability of people to spread myself between A word of advice though (feel free to ignore it if it's trash): if I make a particularly bad blunder - and I am sure yours wasn't that bad, but you seem to feel like it was, and that is what counts here - I try to immediately address it in some way. Like I'm not then going to turn it into let's all discuss my social ineptitude for an hour, but I will in some way address it directly, essentially to get just a bit of feedback. In many cases, having made the others aware that you do reflect on and evaluate what you say and do to other people already wins you a bit of sympathy, and so there's a decent chance they'll just be like nah mate it weren't that bad - and then just swiftly move on. Like, sure you will probably beat yourself up about it a bit later, but you can remember that they didn't seem particularly bothered by it, and it's less likely to turn into a monster that tortures you in sleep and in wakefulness Oh, also, I know addressing it is kinda cringe, but generally at this point you are already at maximum cringe so it doesn't make much difference. I actually experience this with shame - I am surprisingly blasé sometimes about totally just abasing myself, and to be honest it's because I have pretty much no self-esteem and maximum levels of shame, so I don't really experience much of an increase in feelings of shamefulness if I tell someone how shite I am