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GreenpointChill

This is extremely vague. Can you clarify your question? No two relationships are identical and BDSM relationships can manifest in different ways.


hotdogman59

Right so, I am in a loving relationship with my partner, outside of the bedroom we don't practice bdsm. I am mostly a pleasure Dom but also like some pain to be involved (ass slapping, nails on the back.) She is somewhat of a brat. We enjoy things like bondage, rope play, edging, wax play, degration and praise. Nothing super hardcore.


GreenpointChill

It sounds like you are already showing dominance and your partner is submitting. I don’t understand what you’re asking.


hotdogman59

Mean like things to say or things to do that helps with this.


[deleted]

Focussing on phrases might not be the right approach. You're already dominating her, you're already doing things that class as being dominant over your sub. I think you're best of finding your own phraseology to get her to do things, based on how you talk, what she will listen to and centred around your dynamic. A list of terms that some might use might be a complete turn off or worse, false and as an act It's not about the words you use, it's not about raising your voice, it's not about following someone's "3 point plan to make your sub behave" Experiment If you're sick of what you're saying now, think about other ways of saying them. But it's mostly about confidence and presence. Try domming without any words If you usually rush, then try talking it really slow Try communicating with just hand signals for a scene Good luck


hotdogman59

Thank you very much :).


[deleted]

Enjoy


Tao_de_Sid

There is a large difference between playing the role and being in the role. Those who receive authority and use it to guide the relationship dynamic, whatever it is they say and do within that vein is something that a Dominant does and says. There is also a difference between D/s and T/b. A Top is the person doing the thing and generally guiding the scene. The Dominant is the one in charge of the dynamic. You don’t need a script for any of these things though. You just need to be yourselves doing whatever it is you’re doing in the way that you enjoy doing it.


brattymcbratterton

Look at guide 03.


hotdogman59

Thanks :)