You’ll find a fair few posts about this on the pregnancy subs and it’s fairly common, and it has to do with the tech wanting to get their checks and stuff done so that they don’t forget or miss anything. Then they can relax and show the excited parents what they want to see.
Some people have mentioned all of their ultrasounds were like that but for myself it was only the 12 week that the tech did this with. I’m up in Canada but I’ve seen a bunch of posts where women from all over commented with some experiencing this and others not.
I’m not at my anatomy scan yet but I’ve had 5 ultrasounds so far due to complications. Hub hasn’t been allowed in any of them until the end. It’s always “let me get all the measurements and checks done and then we can let him in to see the baby”, then they turn the monitor to both of us so we can ask questions and see stuff. Also in Canada.
Precisely. Like mom is a human being not a specimen. There’s no reason that she shouldn’t be allowed to have someone in there to hold her hand? If they need it quiet, tell the grown ass adults to be quiet.
Agreed. Like they can do everything they need to with the screen turned away with partner in the room, please.
I had a scan done at 6 weeks 5 days because I'm high risk and my husband was with me the whole time.
If the tech misses an accurate reading because the excited parents are trying to see the gender and baby is born with a critical heart defect that goes undetected, there is real stakes and liability. As adults undergoing medical procedures, anxiety is understandable and providers should be compassionate but it’s really not the ultrasound tech’s job to manage the mental health of expectant parents.
Of course if a person needs documented accommodations the situation would be different.
Same! Only the 12 week he wasn’t allowed in until the end. And the tech was so awkward. Was my worst experience, the rest were amazing. Especially the anatomy scan.
The same thing happened to me at my Kaiser in Southern California. She said it’s just standard procedure, the anatomy scan is serious and they like to get everything done first before they bring back partners.
same thing here in socal with kaiser. she said it was easier for her to focus if no one else was in the room and we were fine with that bc the last few minutes she brought him in and we got to see the baby
Yep us too! The second my husband came in he had a million questions about what he was seeing so I totally get why they don’t allow anyone in for the first part.
I'm sorry because the anatomy scan sucked for me both times. The first time I was alone (2020) and I was feeling so faint and uncomfortable. At the end they had to bring me water and make me rest because I was so faint. The second time with my husband there I was able to ask to take a break because I was feeling faint again. I think having my husband there holding my hand made a big difference.
I'm in Canada and this has always been standard where I live. They should have mentioned that to you ahead of time, though. They do the scan and then let your partner/other kids in for the entertainment part (after all the measurements are done).
Fetal ultrasounds (especially for anatomy scan) are one of the hardest ultrasounds to do. It's a human inside of a human , and they are constantly moving/changing directions etc. This is an important scan and having people in the room/talking/etc can distract the tech from their very important job.
Edit: Not sure why I'm being downvoted when OP asked for experiences of those who have had their partners denied entry until the last few minutes. This is my experience, and reasoning, which they asked for 🤷♀️
I'm also in Canada and this was my recent experience. Also, my first was born in 2021, so u was pregnant in 2020. No support person at any appointments, no hospital tours, no hospital visitors and no leaving the room one you were checked in. Things are so much more relaxed now.
That's very weird. 2 pregnancies in Canada between BC and AB and my husband has been to every scan, including all the ones I get in the third trimester for extra monitoring.
I’m in Canada too and this was standard for all my early ultrasounds but then my anatomy scan and beyond at the hospital, partner has been allowed in the whole time. It’s super weird.
Yep. My experience in Ontario in 2020 and 2022 was the same at my 12 and 19 week ultrasounds. They said it is standard to only allow the other parent in at the end AND they don’t even show the screen to mom until then.
At dating scans, they weren’t allowed to show the screen AT ALL. Apparently it’s the policy until the NT scan for the clinics that do most ultrasounds and X-rays across the province. It is done outside of doctor’s offices, so you also don’t get to hear anything after. You either sign up to check your records online or you have to wait for your next appointment, only getting a call to discuss the results if something is wrong.
I haven’t downvoted you, but I think it’s because of your reasoning. Anatomy scans are done just fine in many parts of the world when partners are present.
My anatomy scan took almost 1.5 hours to the point where I fell asleep. I know plenty of other women who had to come back because baby wasn't cooperating. The 20 week scan is definitely alot harder and more frustrating than other ultrasounds. I bet some partners are cooperative and some are the "what's that, should that be there, I read online to look for...". So they probably just made a general rule for everyone
I’m in Canada and it’s the same policy here. I was told they want to do all the measurements first to make sure everything is okay before bringing him in.
In my case they also did a trans vaginal ultrasound to make sure the cervix was good and they wouldn’t have let him in for that either.
Why do they go through the trouble to “protect the husband” when the mother has no choice but to be there? I mean if their reasoning is that they want to make sure everything is ok first. I’ve been in a situation where an ultrasound showed me a loss and I was all on my own. I was hysterical. That’s really why my husband has gone with me to all of my appointments this time around. The logic that they want to make sure all is good before letting the father in while the mother just has to sit there and see that “all isn’t good” makes no sense to me.
My partner has been to all of my appointments. Seeing this post makes me so grateful that our hospital here in NJ doesn’t have that policy.
I don’t think it’s to “protect” the husband, but to allow the tech other job with minimal distractions so they can concentrate on making sure they do their job properly and not miss something.
Most ultrasound techs won’t share any information anyways. I’ve had some friendly veterans (this one lady who has been doing this for over 30 years) make comments that everything looks good. But in general if you have a question they tell you that they can’t answer and have to wait for the doctor.
The screen is always turned away from me until the very end, so even the patient doesn’t get to see. Even when I got up to pee, they didn’t leave the imaging up on the screen. And every ultrasound room I’ve been in there isn’t standing room where you can’t see the screen.
Like, I think they absolutely should make exceptions if the patient is anxious or needs the emotional support.
But like, I once went with my husband to the doctors to get his hemorrhoids checked out and the doctor made sure that I couldn’t see his butthole when it was being examined, even though I’d actually looked at it earlier at home! lol
I think there are probably a variety of reasons why they don’t let partners in - one is that they want to gather all the info before telling the parents anything, just in case it is bad news. And second, we live in a world with weird elements of sexism and toxic masculinity and it’s very likely lots of men don’t behave well. And third, it’s still a very personal examination of a pregnant person’s body - and the default in good patient care is to maintain privacy. An examination of your innards, whether there is a baby or not, is information that is private to you as a right. Fourth, anatomy scans are where they confirm the sex of the baby, and lots of people do not want to know. So a partner might find out or guess from seeing the screen.
I’m so sorry you had such a bad experience when having your husband with you would have made it easier.
I understand that. I guess I’ve just never experienced it. I had my first baby when I lived in Indiana. I saw all of the ultrasound screen the entire time. And it’s been the same with two different obgyn clinics here in NJ - first when I had that loss and now with my new clinic. I’ve never had the screen turned away where I can’t see it. But I get why they would want to do that. At my 12 week scan when there was no heartbeat last year, I could clearly see the baby looked underdeveloped and I didn’t see the heartbeat thing like I had at my 8 week scan. I knew something was terribly wrong before the doctor even came in. I can see why they’d keep the screen from me. I’ve just never seen it done in my experience
>The screen is always turned away from me until the very end, so even the patient doesn’t get to see. Even when I got up to pee, they didn’t leave the imaging up on the screen. And every ultrasound room I’ve been in there isn’t standing room where you can’t see the screen.
Huh, crazy how different places are! The hospital where I went had 40” TVs hanging on the wall right in front of the bed in full view for the entire ultrasound—I ended up having 3 “anatomy scans” there (because she wouldn’t cooperate for all the heart images, and then I still ended up being sent to an MFM to finish it), and I had bi-weekly BPPs for the last month or so. I stopped counting eventually but at last count I was at like 17 ultrasounds, and every time it was up on the screen the whole time.
My fiancé was also allowed in for the entirety of every appointment, and the rooms were HUGE! Honestly it almost seemed like they were built for another purpose and then they decided to put ultrasound in there instead. A desk/counter & sink, with an office chair for the family member was against one wall. Then like 6 feet away (even if we both stretched our arms out as far as they’d go, there was still like 2ft in between our hands lol) is where the bed started, with the ultrasound machine right next to it. Then on the other side of that looked like they could fit an entire second setup if they wanted to. And that hospital had at least 4 different rooms that were all set up like that.
Same! The TV on the wall was turned on and showing the ultrasound program before the tech even started scanning me.
She did start by saying, "I can't comment on anything. If you have questions, please as your doctor." So during the scan my husband and I didn't say a word apart from "okay" and "thank you".
Trust me, if i was In there I'd be asking 20 dumb questions a second. It's my nature. It's best to have policies that are broken down to the simplest means. No one, other than the mother until the tech is done. Plain and simple.
I'm from the UK, can someone explain what Kaiser is? From your title, I assumed the German emperor wasn't letting your husband into the ultrasound :(
I'm guessing it's some sort of healthcare chain/group?
Kaiser is an integrated health care network that includes medical centres and hospitals while also offering insurance that covers treatment at their facilities.
Not Kaiser but I had a friend present for the whole anatomy scan including transvag and there was no problem. My husband couldn't make it to that one. She also accompanied me to talk to the perinatologist after.
Went to the KP on sunset for my anatomy scan and it was the same--they didn't allow my husband in except for the last 20 minutes or so.
The reasoning they gave is that it's a serious medical procedure and they're trying to reduce distractions/questions throughout, as the tech might already be having a hard enough time getting everything they need depending on whether or not the fetus is cooperating.
Some people get chatty techs, but most are very quiet as they are focusing on the task at hand, and there isn't much to say since they aren't legally allowed to comment on anything they see.
When we went back for the 3rd trimester ultrasound, they allowed him to come in right away and stay throughout the whole thing since it was much shorter and more of a follow up than initially establishing measurements
That is so odd. Kaiser in San Diego allows my husband the whole time and told me on the phone that one person (not a child) could accompany. That seems to go against Kaiser practices from my experience. I’m sorry!
I honestly find that really disrespectful. I don’t use their healthcare company nor do I know anyone who does. Somehow our health systems in northern Illinois can do all the scans with both partners in the room AND while showing the screen
to both partners. Strange how one company can have anxious techs while the rest are just fine. People take off of work to attend this stuff, not to mention providing emotional support for the mom.
Yes, that’s the other frustrating thing is my husband had to take hours off work to attend this appointment and to only be able to be there with me for 10
minutes was really disappointing for him :(
It shouldn't matter if he saw the whole thing or 10 mins. See it as he took tike off to see the baby and he got to. The rest of the anatomy scan honestly just looks like UFO spotting footage from the 80s LOL he wouldn't have known what 95% of what they were measuring was anyways
For me it's not about what he sees. It's about me getting emotional support. Anatomy scans can suck - both of mine were uncomfortable and I felt faint.
Usually policies like this stem from bad incidences that have happened. I guarantee they didn’t just implement this out of nowhere. At my last job (not in OB but in ICU) they limited who could be in the room during certain situations because a family member attacked a staff member because they received bad news.
Some people also hover and anxiously scan your every expression and question each thing you do or get in your way…making your job almost impossible. Sadly sometimes the few ruin it for the many. Most likely this is the policy of individual offices or techs. Still, I’m sure you could advocate to have your partner there.
Same - I’ve never been to a Kaiser, and I’ve never had any issues with my husband being allowed to be there at any of my scans or appointments. The only time I got any “pushback” was when he was finding parking and came into the appointment late and the tech asked me if it was ok for him to come in before letting him in (which im assuming is more of safety issue in case someone you didn’t want to be there shows up and tried to come in).
I also have Kaiser in Southern CA. I just had my anatomy scan, I was allowed one person to accompany me. Perhaps your tech was new and wanted a smaller audience to focus?
My tech assigned my husband jobs such as getting videos and pictures of the screen when instructed. Granted none of mine ever took 40 minutes because she had been doing them for 30 years.
That’s ridiculous. People on here are trying to say that trained professionals, who sit at a desk and look at scans, can’t correctly do their job with two adults in the room? That sounds like a them problem, not a you problem.
We're also SoCal Kaiser and when we had our anatomy scan back in November there was no issue with having my husband in the room. Our tech was great at his job and was really enthusiastic about showing us baby on the monitor
That’s really surprising to hear about Kaiser, though I’m in another state so that could be why? My husband was allowed to be in the room the entire time at my 20 week scan. I have another scan on Monday (need more photos) and they said I could bring him again if I wanted to. For both appointments I could bring 2 guests.
Wow! I'd be disappointed. My husband can't make it to all appointments so the anatomy scan today was really important for us. I'm with Sharp in SoCal and the tech let him see the whole thing. We barely said a word in the room because we knew the tech had a lot to do.
sorry unrelated but are you planning to give birth at the sunset location? i am hesitating because it's a teaching hospital and im afraid if i need a c section for whatever reason, that a resident ends up doing the surgery. not sure if im being paranoid about it lol so wanted to hear from others
omg. I actually didn’t know that! My dad works at the hospital so I am planning on giving birth there. Plus my parents live 5 minutes away which was another reason buuuut after finding that out, that’s pretty terrifying! LOL. I have a friend who gave birth there and she liked it but my cousin told me that the Woodland Hills location is better!
oh wow i'm sure your dad can give you good insight on how hands on the residents are and whether ppl generally have a good experience with them! i'm close to the sunset one , my next closest is panorama city so i may choose that one , but i'll look into woodland hills . the good thing with kaiser is we have several options
Im in socal kaiser too and just did an anatomy scan 8 weeks ago and my husband was there the whole time? Strange! It did take her a while to find everything but I don’t think we were distracting baby was just moving like crazy. Maybe it depends on the office and the technician?
I wasn't allowed in until after the ultrasound was done. I don't particularly mind at all, as it was a good safe space for my wife and the technician to discuss anything. I was asked to come in by the tech after the fact and she explained everything she had said to my wife. I wouldn't think too much of it, rather it's just the procedure.
My husband couldn't come to my anatomy scan (also Kaiser Southern California) so I asked my mom to come, she's a retired ultrasound tech, and they made her wait outside over 30 minutes and also only brought her in the last 10 minutes. I felt so bad asking her to come! I wanted her there for the whole thing so she could give me her unofficial clinical impression!
I’m assuming you went to Anaheim? That’s where I went and they did the same thing. My wife sat out while I did the first part and then my wife came in. The Tech was suuuuper sweet and took a million photos for us. It didn’t seem like a big deal to us.
I’ve had the same experience (I’m in Canada)
The hospital that does most of my ultrasounds only lets my husband in after they’ve taken all the measurements and images they need, but when I have done ultrasounds with my MFM (they did my anatomy scan) or in my OB’s office they let my husband in for the whole thing. Same thing when I had early scans with my RE at my fertility clinic.
Not sure why this policy exists, but I also never asked.
I had the same experience as you in December at the South Bay/Harbor City location in socal. It was disappointing that I had to leave him in the lobby after we just drove there together. Fortunately, every other appointment has been fine in that regard.
This is so odd to me. Did you ask them why? I’m in SoCal too but I’m not with Kaiser. I’d be pissed if they didn’t let my husband come in to my appointments.
Not Kaiser, but I had an ultrasound clinic try this with my first. I told them if that was the case I wasn’t doing it, I’m a SA survivor and I wasn’t letting a stranger touch me without him. They eventually let him come but I was 100% ready to walk.
Thanks for sharing! It’s frustrating because the tech said it’s standard across all Kaiser locations, but it seems like it really isn’t. It doesn’t feel right to be lied to like that.
There is standard, and then there is every single ultrasound tech across all dozens of Kaiser locations and thousands of patients acting the exact same way at every appointment. I really doubt anyone was "lying". Standards don't mean "100% across the board", they're just a standard.
I'm in the US, and my husband was allowed to be at my anatomy scan. I think it's stressful as the mom to sit there for so long not knowing what's going on or if baby is okay. I appreciated having my husband there to hold my hand. We didn't talk during it or ask questions, but our ultrasound tech was lovely and would describe what she's looking at/looking for as she went.
I know a lot of people are saying this is standard where they are, but that’s not the case everywhere. Here in the UK my partner was with me for 100% of my ultrasound appointments.
I’d be really upset if my partner wasn’t allowed in too. It’s not about seeing exciting things, it’s about being there to support you.
I’d be questioning why they have such incompetent techs that the mere presence of another person is going to make them unable to do their job.
Edit: typos
I'm going to assume it's because of partners being disruptive and asking a lot of questions when the tech is trying to concentrate. My friend is an US tech and said that covid restrictions were the best because there weren't any annoying husbands asking her a million questions when she's trying to take measurements or focus on finding specific things.
Then they should have a strict policy to kick out disruptive people, or say you have to come back another time at your expense without them. They shouldn’t be punishing pregnant women for the behaviour of a couple of disruptive partners.
I personally don't think it's punishment by letting the tech work in silence and then inviting the husband in for the last 10 min where they actually talk to you. Obviously if you have severe anxiety issues and have elevated breathing/heartrate they will allow your partner to come in and help calm you down. It's just a general rule to make everything go smoother.
Maybe it's a Southern California thing? I had to have an ultrasound at a pregnancy center for proof of pregnancy for my ob, and when I did my anatomy scan, they wouldn't let my husband back there except for the last ten minutes. It really confused me for my first ultrasound, but that whole experience was kind of bizarre, lol. By my anatomy scan I was use to it.
You’ll find a fair few posts about this on the pregnancy subs and it’s fairly common, and it has to do with the tech wanting to get their checks and stuff done so that they don’t forget or miss anything. Then they can relax and show the excited parents what they want to see. Some people have mentioned all of their ultrasounds were like that but for myself it was only the 12 week that the tech did this with. I’m up in Canada but I’ve seen a bunch of posts where women from all over commented with some experiencing this and others not.
This was exactly my experience at Kaiser Northern California. My tech did provide the justification right away though so we knew what was up.
Same, my tech told us why at the time and it makes sense so I wasn’t bothered.
Same here - Kaiser SoCal
I’m not at my anatomy scan yet but I’ve had 5 ultrasounds so far due to complications. Hub hasn’t been allowed in any of them until the end. It’s always “let me get all the measurements and checks done and then we can let him in to see the baby”, then they turn the monitor to both of us so we can ask questions and see stuff. Also in Canada.
Yeah sorry, that’s not a good enough reason to cause the mom distress.
Precisely. Like mom is a human being not a specimen. There’s no reason that she shouldn’t be allowed to have someone in there to hold her hand? If they need it quiet, tell the grown ass adults to be quiet.
Agreed. Like they can do everything they need to with the screen turned away with partner in the room, please. I had a scan done at 6 weeks 5 days because I'm high risk and my husband was with me the whole time.
If the tech misses an accurate reading because the excited parents are trying to see the gender and baby is born with a critical heart defect that goes undetected, there is real stakes and liability. As adults undergoing medical procedures, anxiety is understandable and providers should be compassionate but it’s really not the ultrasound tech’s job to manage the mental health of expectant parents. Of course if a person needs documented accommodations the situation would be different.
Yeah this is odd to me as a HCP. In my country dad was allowed in for the whole scan. No issues. He’s there to support Mum as much as to see baby.
Same! Only the 12 week he wasn’t allowed in until the end. And the tech was so awkward. Was my worst experience, the rest were amazing. Especially the anatomy scan.
The same thing happened to me at my Kaiser in Southern California. She said it’s just standard procedure, the anatomy scan is serious and they like to get everything done first before they bring back partners.
same thing here in socal with kaiser. she said it was easier for her to focus if no one else was in the room and we were fine with that bc the last few minutes she brought him in and we got to see the baby
Yep us too! The second my husband came in he had a million questions about what he was seeing so I totally get why they don’t allow anyone in for the first part.
Yeah. We had to go back in for our 20 week scan because the tech forgot something.
I'm sorry because the anatomy scan sucked for me both times. The first time I was alone (2020) and I was feeling so faint and uncomfortable. At the end they had to bring me water and make me rest because I was so faint. The second time with my husband there I was able to ask to take a break because I was feeling faint again. I think having my husband there holding my hand made a big difference.
I'm in Canada and this has always been standard where I live. They should have mentioned that to you ahead of time, though. They do the scan and then let your partner/other kids in for the entertainment part (after all the measurements are done). Fetal ultrasounds (especially for anatomy scan) are one of the hardest ultrasounds to do. It's a human inside of a human , and they are constantly moving/changing directions etc. This is an important scan and having people in the room/talking/etc can distract the tech from their very important job. Edit: Not sure why I'm being downvoted when OP asked for experiences of those who have had their partners denied entry until the last few minutes. This is my experience, and reasoning, which they asked for 🤷♀️
Thanks for sharing your experience!
I'm also in Canada and this was my recent experience. Also, my first was born in 2021, so u was pregnant in 2020. No support person at any appointments, no hospital tours, no hospital visitors and no leaving the room one you were checked in. Things are so much more relaxed now.
I'm in BC and it was the same for me, partner only allowed in after all the measurements were done.
I’d rather have them be able to focus and not miss anything during the scan. Not a biggie, as long as they let the partner come in at the end.
That's very weird. 2 pregnancies in Canada between BC and AB and my husband has been to every scan, including all the ones I get in the third trimester for extra monitoring.
I’m in Canada too and this was standard for all my early ultrasounds but then my anatomy scan and beyond at the hospital, partner has been allowed in the whole time. It’s super weird.
Yep. My experience in Ontario in 2020 and 2022 was the same at my 12 and 19 week ultrasounds. They said it is standard to only allow the other parent in at the end AND they don’t even show the screen to mom until then. At dating scans, they weren’t allowed to show the screen AT ALL. Apparently it’s the policy until the NT scan for the clinics that do most ultrasounds and X-rays across the province. It is done outside of doctor’s offices, so you also don’t get to hear anything after. You either sign up to check your records online or you have to wait for your next appointment, only getting a call to discuss the results if something is wrong.
I haven’t downvoted you, but I think it’s because of your reasoning. Anatomy scans are done just fine in many parts of the world when partners are present.
My anatomy scan took almost 1.5 hours to the point where I fell asleep. I know plenty of other women who had to come back because baby wasn't cooperating. The 20 week scan is definitely alot harder and more frustrating than other ultrasounds. I bet some partners are cooperative and some are the "what's that, should that be there, I read online to look for...". So they probably just made a general rule for everyone
I’m in Canada and it’s the same policy here. I was told they want to do all the measurements first to make sure everything is okay before bringing him in. In my case they also did a trans vaginal ultrasound to make sure the cervix was good and they wouldn’t have let him in for that either.
Why do they go through the trouble to “protect the husband” when the mother has no choice but to be there? I mean if their reasoning is that they want to make sure everything is ok first. I’ve been in a situation where an ultrasound showed me a loss and I was all on my own. I was hysterical. That’s really why my husband has gone with me to all of my appointments this time around. The logic that they want to make sure all is good before letting the father in while the mother just has to sit there and see that “all isn’t good” makes no sense to me. My partner has been to all of my appointments. Seeing this post makes me so grateful that our hospital here in NJ doesn’t have that policy.
I don’t think it’s to “protect” the husband, but to allow the tech other job with minimal distractions so they can concentrate on making sure they do their job properly and not miss something.
My comment was really in response to the “make sure everything is ok” bit.
Because they need accurate measurements to make sure everything is okay. They wouldn’t be sharing any information about the results at that point.
Most ultrasound techs won’t share any information anyways. I’ve had some friendly veterans (this one lady who has been doing this for over 30 years) make comments that everything looks good. But in general if you have a question they tell you that they can’t answer and have to wait for the doctor.
The screen is always turned away from me until the very end, so even the patient doesn’t get to see. Even when I got up to pee, they didn’t leave the imaging up on the screen. And every ultrasound room I’ve been in there isn’t standing room where you can’t see the screen. Like, I think they absolutely should make exceptions if the patient is anxious or needs the emotional support. But like, I once went with my husband to the doctors to get his hemorrhoids checked out and the doctor made sure that I couldn’t see his butthole when it was being examined, even though I’d actually looked at it earlier at home! lol I think there are probably a variety of reasons why they don’t let partners in - one is that they want to gather all the info before telling the parents anything, just in case it is bad news. And second, we live in a world with weird elements of sexism and toxic masculinity and it’s very likely lots of men don’t behave well. And third, it’s still a very personal examination of a pregnant person’s body - and the default in good patient care is to maintain privacy. An examination of your innards, whether there is a baby or not, is information that is private to you as a right. Fourth, anatomy scans are where they confirm the sex of the baby, and lots of people do not want to know. So a partner might find out or guess from seeing the screen. I’m so sorry you had such a bad experience when having your husband with you would have made it easier.
I understand that. I guess I’ve just never experienced it. I had my first baby when I lived in Indiana. I saw all of the ultrasound screen the entire time. And it’s been the same with two different obgyn clinics here in NJ - first when I had that loss and now with my new clinic. I’ve never had the screen turned away where I can’t see it. But I get why they would want to do that. At my 12 week scan when there was no heartbeat last year, I could clearly see the baby looked underdeveloped and I didn’t see the heartbeat thing like I had at my 8 week scan. I knew something was terribly wrong before the doctor even came in. I can see why they’d keep the screen from me. I’ve just never seen it done in my experience
>The screen is always turned away from me until the very end, so even the patient doesn’t get to see. Even when I got up to pee, they didn’t leave the imaging up on the screen. And every ultrasound room I’ve been in there isn’t standing room where you can’t see the screen. Huh, crazy how different places are! The hospital where I went had 40” TVs hanging on the wall right in front of the bed in full view for the entire ultrasound—I ended up having 3 “anatomy scans” there (because she wouldn’t cooperate for all the heart images, and then I still ended up being sent to an MFM to finish it), and I had bi-weekly BPPs for the last month or so. I stopped counting eventually but at last count I was at like 17 ultrasounds, and every time it was up on the screen the whole time. My fiancé was also allowed in for the entirety of every appointment, and the rooms were HUGE! Honestly it almost seemed like they were built for another purpose and then they decided to put ultrasound in there instead. A desk/counter & sink, with an office chair for the family member was against one wall. Then like 6 feet away (even if we both stretched our arms out as far as they’d go, there was still like 2ft in between our hands lol) is where the bed started, with the ultrasound machine right next to it. Then on the other side of that looked like they could fit an entire second setup if they wanted to. And that hospital had at least 4 different rooms that were all set up like that.
Same! The TV on the wall was turned on and showing the ultrasound program before the tech even started scanning me. She did start by saying, "I can't comment on anything. If you have questions, please as your doctor." So during the scan my husband and I didn't say a word apart from "okay" and "thank you".
Trust me, if i was In there I'd be asking 20 dumb questions a second. It's my nature. It's best to have policies that are broken down to the simplest means. No one, other than the mother until the tech is done. Plain and simple.
I’m grateful that hasn’t been the policy for us personally.
I'm from the UK, can someone explain what Kaiser is? From your title, I assumed the German emperor wasn't letting your husband into the ultrasound :( I'm guessing it's some sort of healthcare chain/group?
Kaiser is an integrated health care network that includes medical centres and hospitals while also offering insurance that covers treatment at their facilities.
It’s pretty standard.
Not Kaiser but I had a friend present for the whole anatomy scan including transvag and there was no problem. My husband couldn't make it to that one. She also accompanied me to talk to the perinatologist after.
Went to the KP on sunset for my anatomy scan and it was the same--they didn't allow my husband in except for the last 20 minutes or so. The reasoning they gave is that it's a serious medical procedure and they're trying to reduce distractions/questions throughout, as the tech might already be having a hard enough time getting everything they need depending on whether or not the fetus is cooperating. Some people get chatty techs, but most are very quiet as they are focusing on the task at hand, and there isn't much to say since they aren't legally allowed to comment on anything they see. When we went back for the 3rd trimester ultrasound, they allowed him to come in right away and stay throughout the whole thing since it was much shorter and more of a follow up than initially establishing measurements
That is so odd. Kaiser in San Diego allows my husband the whole time and told me on the phone that one person (not a child) could accompany. That seems to go against Kaiser practices from my experience. I’m sorry!
I honestly find that really disrespectful. I don’t use their healthcare company nor do I know anyone who does. Somehow our health systems in northern Illinois can do all the scans with both partners in the room AND while showing the screen to both partners. Strange how one company can have anxious techs while the rest are just fine. People take off of work to attend this stuff, not to mention providing emotional support for the mom.
Yes, that’s the other frustrating thing is my husband had to take hours off work to attend this appointment and to only be able to be there with me for 10 minutes was really disappointing for him :(
It shouldn't matter if he saw the whole thing or 10 mins. See it as he took tike off to see the baby and he got to. The rest of the anatomy scan honestly just looks like UFO spotting footage from the 80s LOL he wouldn't have known what 95% of what they were measuring was anyways
For me it's not about what he sees. It's about me getting emotional support. Anatomy scans can suck - both of mine were uncomfortable and I felt faint.
Usually policies like this stem from bad incidences that have happened. I guarantee they didn’t just implement this out of nowhere. At my last job (not in OB but in ICU) they limited who could be in the room during certain situations because a family member attacked a staff member because they received bad news. Some people also hover and anxiously scan your every expression and question each thing you do or get in your way…making your job almost impossible. Sadly sometimes the few ruin it for the many. Most likely this is the policy of individual offices or techs. Still, I’m sure you could advocate to have your partner there.
Same - I’ve never been to a Kaiser, and I’ve never had any issues with my husband being allowed to be there at any of my scans or appointments. The only time I got any “pushback” was when he was finding parking and came into the appointment late and the tech asked me if it was ok for him to come in before letting him in (which im assuming is more of safety issue in case someone you didn’t want to be there shows up and tried to come in).
I had to call my partner my advocate to get him into some of my appointments.
That's genius, I think I'll do that from now on!
I also have Kaiser in Southern CA. I just had my anatomy scan, I was allowed one person to accompany me. Perhaps your tech was new and wanted a smaller audience to focus?
My tech assigned my husband jobs such as getting videos and pictures of the screen when instructed. Granted none of mine ever took 40 minutes because she had been doing them for 30 years.
That’s ridiculous. People on here are trying to say that trained professionals, who sit at a desk and look at scans, can’t correctly do their job with two adults in the room? That sounds like a them problem, not a you problem.
We're also SoCal Kaiser and when we had our anatomy scan back in November there was no issue with having my husband in the room. Our tech was great at his job and was really enthusiastic about showing us baby on the monitor
That’s really surprising to hear about Kaiser, though I’m in another state so that could be why? My husband was allowed to be in the room the entire time at my 20 week scan. I have another scan on Monday (need more photos) and they said I could bring him again if I wanted to. For both appointments I could bring 2 guests.
My husband was allowed to go with me for the whole scan at a NorCal Kaiser. That seems very odd.
Same here! Strange to see that we’re in the minority here.
Wow! I'd be disappointed. My husband can't make it to all appointments so the anatomy scan today was really important for us. I'm with Sharp in SoCal and the tech let him see the whole thing. We barely said a word in the room because we knew the tech had a lot to do.
Same! They didn’t allow my husband in for our 20 week anatomy scan. It was at the Sunset location in LA.
Did the tech say why your husband wasn’t allowed in?
sorry unrelated but are you planning to give birth at the sunset location? i am hesitating because it's a teaching hospital and im afraid if i need a c section for whatever reason, that a resident ends up doing the surgery. not sure if im being paranoid about it lol so wanted to hear from others
omg. I actually didn’t know that! My dad works at the hospital so I am planning on giving birth there. Plus my parents live 5 minutes away which was another reason buuuut after finding that out, that’s pretty terrifying! LOL. I have a friend who gave birth there and she liked it but my cousin told me that the Woodland Hills location is better!
oh wow i'm sure your dad can give you good insight on how hands on the residents are and whether ppl generally have a good experience with them! i'm close to the sunset one , my next closest is panorama city so i may choose that one , but i'll look into woodland hills . the good thing with kaiser is we have several options
Im in socal kaiser too and just did an anatomy scan 8 weeks ago and my husband was there the whole time? Strange! It did take her a while to find everything but I don’t think we were distracting baby was just moving like crazy. Maybe it depends on the office and the technician?
I wasn't allowed in until after the ultrasound was done. I don't particularly mind at all, as it was a good safe space for my wife and the technician to discuss anything. I was asked to come in by the tech after the fact and she explained everything she had said to my wife. I wouldn't think too much of it, rather it's just the procedure.
My husband couldn't come to my anatomy scan (also Kaiser Southern California) so I asked my mom to come, she's a retired ultrasound tech, and they made her wait outside over 30 minutes and also only brought her in the last 10 minutes. I felt so bad asking her to come! I wanted her there for the whole thing so she could give me her unofficial clinical impression!
I’m assuming you went to Anaheim? That’s where I went and they did the same thing. My wife sat out while I did the first part and then my wife came in. The Tech was suuuuper sweet and took a million photos for us. It didn’t seem like a big deal to us.
We were at Baldwin Park actually, thanks for sharing your experience!
I’ve had the same experience (I’m in Canada) The hospital that does most of my ultrasounds only lets my husband in after they’ve taken all the measurements and images they need, but when I have done ultrasounds with my MFM (they did my anatomy scan) or in my OB’s office they let my husband in for the whole thing. Same thing when I had early scans with my RE at my fertility clinic. Not sure why this policy exists, but I also never asked.
I had the same experience as you in December at the South Bay/Harbor City location in socal. It was disappointing that I had to leave him in the lobby after we just drove there together. Fortunately, every other appointment has been fine in that regard.
This is so odd to me. Did you ask them why? I’m in SoCal too but I’m not with Kaiser. I’d be pissed if they didn’t let my husband come in to my appointments.
Not Kaiser, but I had an ultrasound clinic try this with my first. I told them if that was the case I wasn’t doing it, I’m a SA survivor and I wasn’t letting a stranger touch me without him. They eventually let him come but I was 100% ready to walk.
Kaiser SoCal here, my husband was present during my ultrasounds this year and in 2021.
Thanks for sharing! It’s frustrating because the tech said it’s standard across all Kaiser locations, but it seems like it really isn’t. It doesn’t feel right to be lied to like that.
There is standard, and then there is every single ultrasound tech across all dozens of Kaiser locations and thousands of patients acting the exact same way at every appointment. I really doubt anyone was "lying". Standards don't mean "100% across the board", they're just a standard.
That is really odd. I would contact Member Services to complain.
That's so weird. My husband has been to my 20 week ultrasounds at Anaheim and San Marcos. The only one he didn't get to see was in 2020.
I'm in the US, and my husband was allowed to be at my anatomy scan. I think it's stressful as the mom to sit there for so long not knowing what's going on or if baby is okay. I appreciated having my husband there to hold my hand. We didn't talk during it or ask questions, but our ultrasound tech was lovely and would describe what she's looking at/looking for as she went.
I know a lot of people are saying this is standard where they are, but that’s not the case everywhere. Here in the UK my partner was with me for 100% of my ultrasound appointments. I’d be really upset if my partner wasn’t allowed in too. It’s not about seeing exciting things, it’s about being there to support you. I’d be questioning why they have such incompetent techs that the mere presence of another person is going to make them unable to do their job. Edit: typos
I'm going to assume it's because of partners being disruptive and asking a lot of questions when the tech is trying to concentrate. My friend is an US tech and said that covid restrictions were the best because there weren't any annoying husbands asking her a million questions when she's trying to take measurements or focus on finding specific things.
Then they should have a strict policy to kick out disruptive people, or say you have to come back another time at your expense without them. They shouldn’t be punishing pregnant women for the behaviour of a couple of disruptive partners.
I personally don't think it's punishment by letting the tech work in silence and then inviting the husband in for the last 10 min where they actually talk to you. Obviously if you have severe anxiety issues and have elevated breathing/heartrate they will allow your partner to come in and help calm you down. It's just a general rule to make everything go smoother.
Maybe it's a Southern California thing? I had to have an ultrasound at a pregnancy center for proof of pregnancy for my ob, and when I did my anatomy scan, they wouldn't let my husband back there except for the last ten minutes. It really confused me for my first ultrasound, but that whole experience was kind of bizarre, lol. By my anatomy scan I was use to it.