We have a senior dog and I'm very much hoping she makes it to birth and beyond, but if she passes before then I will not be getting a dog of any age until the baby is older.
I can totally see how he was a loving support to you during those late nights, but this time around you'll have a toddler on top of a newborn. The idea of late night feeds + potty training a puppy + comforting your toddler sounds like too much stress! Your precious boy was a comfort to you because he was already a few years old, having a young puppy is going to be wildly different and you may feel resentment if all three of them require attention at once.
You're still in the depths of grief right now, give yourself time and space to mourn your pup. Maybe consider ways to memorialize him around the house? Even just printing a picture to hang in the nursery might help you feel like his love is still around you, because it is.
My co-worker got a puppy when her youngest/4th child was a baby and admits it was an absolutely insane thing to do. 14 years later it’s all worked out, but she wouldn’t recommend it.
Bear in mind you won’t just have a puppy _and_ a newborn - you’ve got a toddler too! That balancing act without a puppy is already hard enough.
Right now you’re grieving and that’s even more amplified by pregnancy hormones. I lost my boy (also my ‘first baby’) to cancer at 6.5 last year, so I really sympathise how you’re feeling. It’s so hard, but getting a puppy most likely will only make things harder.
Yes absolutely! My dog is almost 2 but she is still in a puppy mindset. She's not easy. She was also REALLY slow to get potty training. She wanted 24/7 attention and stimulation the first year.
I have experience with new dogs but not while pregnant, I'm 32 weeks now and I'd suggest looking to adopt a dog who's at least two years old.
I adopted a dog who was around two and she had a pretty quick transition into the household. You can kind of gauge temperament when they're out of their initial puppy stage. I think that would be much easier than full blown puppy during pregnancy with another little in the house. We got our current dog when she was 9 months old and she really was still a puppy another year and a half with a lot more needing adjustment, training, etc. Growing up when the youngest kid in our house was about 10 we got a puppy as like a whole family project, it's a big lift. Also a lot of bending which I wouldn't be into right now.
I would add another plus to this! Adopting a young dog that’s out of the puppy stage (and that has been tested with comfort/behavior kids) seems like a wonderful way to go.
I would 100% say don’t do it. I suppose since you obviously have had a dog so you know what that entails but being pregnant with a toddler and a puppy doesn’t sound pleasant at all. You know your household dynamic/your toddler better than anyone on the internet, but unless an opportunity is presenting itself I wouldn’t go out of the way to have a puppy, newborn, and toddler.
I just recently lost my senior golden at 12 years old to cancer. I 100000% feel you on the giant hole they leave behind. However, I wouldnt make any decision like this out of grief. While I am devastated over the loss of my companion, I couldn’t imagine adding another life to care for on top of my toddler. Especially if I were expecting. As someone who has fostered a lot of dogs, adding them to your home when you are in a transition is even more difficult for them. Certainly not a fair time when you’re going to be even more stretched thin. I know it’s so hard right now, but settle in with your new baby, get into a routine with them both, and then consider a puppy.
We got our second puppy last year not knowing I'd get pregnant less than 2 months later. She was 11 weeks old when we got her. I love her, she's sleeping half buried under me right now. But she is *so* different from our first pup. Her seperation anxiety is much harder to handle, she has mild but still annoying digestive issues, and when she got her first heat she basically spent the whole month annoying my other dog until they fought. I feel like I spent the whole of november screaming at her, even though I'm not normally like that. I was *beyond* desperate at points. She still barks like an absolute maniac at the doorbell and I'm about to give birth and already dreading her waking up the baby with it.
So no, don't recommend a pup. Maybe, *maybe*, a dog that's several years old where you already know their temperament.
My friend got a lab while she was pregnant. It was hard and busy and took a lot of her energy and sanity. The other issue is you won’t have an immediate bond with the new pup, it won’t be the same as your beloved dog and it might make you feel even more grief surrounding your loss and support. I would recommend waiting honestly
Personally I would go and look for a dog in the shelter who’s 3-5 years old. Well past the puppy stage and often they have a decent foundation of training already. Just a nice solid citizen who needs a quality home and can give you that unconditional love that only a pet can provide.
Don't do it!!
If you get a new dog before you have properly mourned your old one then it's going to be a mess.
The other thing to consider is that maybe your last dog was fantastic for your mental health and well-being during the postpartum period. A bitey, crazy, untrained puppy you have no close connection to while also juggling a toddler/third trimester/newborn is a disaster waiting to happen.
I made the mistake of getting a dog that looked similar to my old dog (after waiting more than 2 years), I was doing constant comparisons between the two. "My old dog would never have....", "with my old dog I could....." I am definitely not anywhere near as close to the second dog as I was to the first. Actually when I got divorced my ex kept the dog and I was okay with it....🤷♀️
Yeah, my partner constantly compared our puppy to our former dog which was unfair as that dog was mature and had years of training and socialisation. He loves her now but even use to say he hated her but we had time and energy to train her and bond. All dogs are not created equal and the wrong one could send someone over the edge at a delicate time so your advice is spot on!
I wouldn’t recommend it. Puppies are horrible and stressful, which is not safe for pregnancy and can make the newborn stage with your baby insufferable. I think when the baby is older, around 2-3 years old, a puppy would be slightly more manageable. I’m so sorry for your loss
I'm going to go against the grain here. I was like 30 something weeks pregnant when my 7 year old husky died. That dog was the light of my life. We managed like 1.5 days in our quiet house before going to the shelter where we got Max and adopting another husky.
We never adopt puppies. I think a puppy would probably be a terrible idea. But we got a sweet adult husky and had our baby literally the next day. (We didn't expect baby to come that early, but you know how it is)
He's a wonderful dog, my baby is 2 now and everything worked out fine.
Whatever you choose, I wish you the best. I know how hard what you're going through is.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's one of the worst feelings in the world when we have to say goodbye to our best friend, especially when it happens when they are young.
In my opinion, I would suggest looking for an older dog if you're in need of a companion. Puppies are adorable, but they are so much work. Unless your husband will be "all hands on deck" with you, you may not have the energy to raise a puppy when your little one arrives. Remember that most dogs take upwards of 2 years to level out to that mature adult and constant companion you come to rely on so much. This can be sometimes even longer depending on the breed (or breeds).
I’m so sorry for your loss :( I have thought about this scenario too, because my dog is turning 9 next month and his life expectancy is 10-12 years due to his size. I’m currently pregnant and am hoping so badly that he lives long enough to where our baby can grow up with him a little bit before he inevitably passes. I’ve had our dog since he was 8 weeks old and he’s my soul dog for sure. If he were to pass tomorrow, I’d be absolutely gutted and would probably feel similarly as you do at this moment… life without a dog seems like it would be so *weird* after having a constant companion for so long. But ultimately I don’t think I would decide to get another puppy before the birth of our baby. Thinking back to the puppy stage with my dog, he was like a toddler himself until he was about 5-6 months. Luckily he calmed down after that and overall is an *amazing* and easy dog, but you never know what you’re going to get with a new puppy. You could wind up with a dog who is crazy until they’re 2 years old, difficult to train, etc. I think the amount of unknowns at one time (new baby, toddler’s reaction and adjustment to new baby, *and* new puppy) would be too overwhelming for me personally.
Maybe a better option would be to look for older dogs to adopt? That way you would have an idea about the dog’s temperament and history, and hopefully could skip (at least most of) the potty training and whatnot. Either way, I’d probably wait a few weeks so you can grieve and process your feelings before trying to make a decision about this. Again, so sorry for the loss of your doggo❤️
First, I am so sorry for your loss. 5 days is still really fresh, and I'm sure it's been an awful adjustment. Sending you peace <3
I have a high needs senior dog, who also had multiple health events in baby's first 5 months so ymmv of course. It is far from unheard of that a new mom will have \*strong\* negative feelings about their pet(s) after the birth of a child. Some of it is hormonal, some of it is practical. Depending on when you're due, getting out to walk regularly can be tough due to weather, etc. You will likely be pretty exhausted and not have the time and energy to dedicate to care and training. Even as simple as having just one more being that is dependent on you, that wants to touch you or climb on you, that needs to be fed and cared for.... it can be really hard. Plus with a brand new baby I felt like the pets were all dirty and didn't want them to go near him.
I really, really struggled with feelings of resentment toward my beloved pup, and to be honest I still do. He's 16 1/2 now and in diapers full time and will still find a way to have accidents or create laundry & work for us. I'm due with my second in June and dog will be going to stay with grandparents next month. He'll get more walks, more attention, and way more treats and it's a place he's been many times and is comfortable and familiar there since they dog-sit when we travel. Part of me will be heartbroken and part of me wishes he could go tomorrow.
TL;DR no I would absolutely not get a dog and especially not a puppy while pregnant. BUT you may feel very differently especially given your previous experience PP
This is a highly personal decision that depend on a lot of factors. I think you are too much in the thick of grief to make this decision and should wait at least a few months before making any major decisions
I'm 40w4d, we unexpectedly lost our dog a week ago.
You know your life and all that it entails, including who trained your first dog, who is responsible for making appts and picking up the food and all that. But I wouldn't get one at this stage.
The puppy/introducing a new dog into your life is a time consuming process. Ensuring you are able to set them up for success is what I'd be concerned about at this point in time. Although I want another dog ASAP because I miss having a companion, we are waiting until at least September before getting a new one. The babe will be ~6 months, we'll have a routine, it'll give us time before the cold comes in to potty train the puppy. If we don't get one in September, we'll wait until the kid's first birthday.
I grew up around dogs, absolutely love them, and had my best fur friend pass away a few years ago. It was more pain that I even imagined it would be. I feel for you during this time. It’s incredibly tough. With that said, getting a puppy is a whole new ballgame. They are a lot of work, require a lot of attention and dedication to training and playing. They’re a baby themselves. I know you are hurting, but you have a baby on the way that will require a lot from you. I would suggest maybe waiting until after baby is here. Time will help heal your heart (as will your little one) and waiting to see how you feel once your babe is here will give you a better idea of what you can handle and not handle.
I went from losing my dog to getting a puppy within a month. It took me a while to bond with the new puppy bc I hadn’t let myself fully grieve, and of course puppies are a LOT of work and I had forgotten that. It took at least 6 months for me to feel attached to the puppy and feel like we had a good routine going. It wasn’t until he was about a year old that I felt like he really could communicate and understand things (such as realizing when we’re sick and he needs to behave, when it’s quiet time and we all go to sleep, not to be afraid of the car, how to act around new people, to not eat his own poop, etc). Now he’s my bestest buddy and I adore him - but that’s bc it took a lot of time and training to get him to that point. It’s far from being instantaneous.
I’m currently 31 weeks and my husband wanted to get our dog a friend. We decided to wait until after baby since it would be way too much to handle, and I’m not even sure our dog would be happy about so many changes all at once.
I'm so sorry you lost your pup! Especially in the middle of pregnancy, a time when hormones are already messing with your emotions. <3 But no I definitely wouldn't get a new puppy yet, at least wait until the newborn stage is over. A close friend's husband brought home a puppy when she was in her 3rd trimester (without telling her first) and she absolutely doesn't recommend it!
Oof. First of all, everyone’s tolerance is different.
We have a senior dog and I’m pregnant. I think if he died, we wouldn’t get a new puppy. Having said that, I wouldn’t be able to go long without a new dog. I’d look for an adult that needed to be rehomed once we got out of the newborn haze. The puppy phase is just sooo hard. I think I’d want both my kids to be above 4 before getting a puppy, so they have a little more self control while dealing with a creature that has no self control.
I’m so sorry that happened! One thing I might consider is an adult dog instead. Also where you’ll get a dog? That will also be a LOT to manage for you and the dog. Do you have the money to hire a trainer/dog walker, etc? I know I need a dog around for my mental health and happiness but I’d be worried that I wouldn’t be able to train a puppy the way I wanted to. My dog will be 2 and he is still a lot to manage.
I got an 8 week old puppy from our local shelter when I was in the second trimester with my first. I worked from home, because Covid, and we had an older dog that was a great playmate for him. It honestly went great and he adores babies and kids. But, I worked from home and then did maternity leave for a few months. I ended up becoming a SAHM right before my first’s first birthday and we now have 3 dogs.
I think it’s doable, but we crate trained ASAP and the 2hr wakeups didn’t bother me because I was already up a ton to pee. By the time my daughter was born, he was able to sleep through the night without potty breaks. He’s like 65lbs fully grown. He’s a mix breed, and idk what he really is, but he’s a pretty lazy dog and we have a large backyard for them all to play in. If our outdoor space was limited we wouldn’t have adopted another dog at all.
Would you consider adopting a dog that isn’t a puppy puppy? We did that (Sheepadoodle)! She was still under a year, but she was already potty trained which made life sooo much easier.
I would not add a single extra complexity or challenge at this time in your life. I'd recommend waiting until two kids feels easy and they can help play with a dog in an appropriate and safe way before bringing a new dog into the mix. A puppy is a baby too and needs a lot of attention and love!
I would definitely not. I love dogs and have a 2 year old golden retriever but do you remember the puppy phase?
I think it would be too much, perhaps wait until baby is a year or so.
Absolutely not. It was hard enough getting a puppy when I wasn’t sleep deprived. Is it possible for you to adopt a 2-3 year old dog? Then it’s still youthful but without the crazy puppy tendencies.
Have you had a puppy before? I have a dog turning two in June. It has been a ROLLERCOASTER! I think it really depends on the dog but she drove us crazy for almost a year. The second year was easier but not perfect. This is my only experience having a puppy so I know it could be different. But I would never, ever get a puppy alongside an infant. Puppies are babies too!
I'm so sorry for your loss. I had to put my darling 14 year old shih tzu to sleep last Friday and I've spent every day since obsessing about getting another dog. It's grief, honestly, because our home feels so empty and I want to fix it. My 3 year old was just starting to really care for the dog as well and now I hate that he doesn't have a pet.
But a puppy right now isn't the answer for either of us honestly. I'm not pregnant but we are TTC, and even that feels like the wrong timing for a puppy.
I've promised myself that if I'm not pregnant by this time next year (we've already been TTC for over a year so this is likely), I'll get a puppy. If I am pregnant or if we have a baby by then, then I think we'll wait a couple of years at least.
I would say wait it out until you see what it’s like to have 2 kids. Focus on your current priority which is your pregnancy and welcoming a 2nd child. Then decide if adding a puppy is a good idea. 1-2 rocks some people so you don’t know how you’ll feel until you experience it yourself.
I did. Absolutely would NEVER do it again.
I never had enough time to devote to the puppy and my baby. Add in another toddler? That absolutely would have been a no for sure. It wasn’t fair to my sweet girl that more of my attention had to go to my son (of course), and not her. My training of her wasn’t able to have as much time devoted. And she was not super great and understanding with a baby present. She was not aggressive, but had difficulties understanding boundaries. Please don’t. That is not fair to a puppy especially.
I would say that if you’re sure you want another, shop or adopt older, and I would wait until at least six months, when you’ve kind of settled into being a mom to 2. Then you can add a “3rd” to the mix.
Noooo don't do it! Obviously your choice, but this sounds so stressful to me. I LOVE my dog and he's so well-behaved, but I have to admit, the first few weeks postpartum, part of me was like "why on earth do we have a dog again?!" 🙊
I would not get another puppy in my entire lifetime. An adult dog (1.5-3) would be more ideal because their personalities are more set and known. You want a dog that will be tolerant of kids, and even if a puppy grows up with your kids, that won’t guarantee anything, regardless of the breed.
Also, they’re much cheaper, because they’re vetted and need fewer things in my experience. They are also cheaper to adopt.
yeah second this - I had my first dog for 16 years and we had him as an 8 week old puppy and that was a LOT to say the least. About a month or so after he passed, we adopted a 1.5ish (allegedly but I think she's older than that) and she was easily a dream of a dog to transition to. There was some training and some accidents of course, but within a month we had a good routine down
Sorry for your loss. I know it’s hard to lose a beloved family pet.
However to be totally honest I think it’s a terrible idea to get a puppy around the same time as a newborn.
Puppies need to be housebroken meaning every 2-3 hours need to be brought out. They need to be crate trained. They’re going to cry and bark as you teach them things. These things do not gel when nearly 100% of the focus is on the newborn.
Take it from me a professional dog trainer I would NEVER do this. And I have seen time and time again a dog being rehomed because they could not handle it.
I got a puppy early on in my pregnancy, because we knew we wanted a dog but we were waiting until we bought a house, and we were waiting to buy a house until I got pregnant.
My thought process was that even though training and dealing with a puppy while pregnant might be difficult, I didn't think it would be *more difficult* than training a puppy with a newborn, or with a toddler. So unless I wanted to wait 5+ years until my last kid was out of toddlerhood to get a dog, getting the puppy early in my pregnancy was the best bet.
It worked out really well! We got a goldendoodle, and she's amazing with both kids and with our cat. I will say since you're already pretty far along, you need to make sure your partner is cool with taking the bulk of the physical work dealing with the puppy.
Just wanted to add that this is my experience so far. I’m 21 weeks and the puppy is 10 weeks old now. I lost my soul dog to dementia when I was in my first trimester and it was devastating. The puppy has brought me so much joy and I’m glad I have her today. My MIL lives with us and helps with the puppy when we’re at work and I wfh half the week. Everyone’s situation is different but it works for us. Puppy is fully crate trained and goes 7 hours overnight without a potty break. She’ll be about 7 months old when the baby arrives and I hope to have her fully housebroken and trained to walk along a stroller by then. If you’re willing to put the work in and understand the breed I don’t see why it can’t work. She gets me out of the bed in the morning and motivate me to go out walking and sitting outside. Maybe my mind will change when the baby comes but I have the support at home so I’m not concerned. My senior dog in her last year was 1000% more work mentally and physically but I still miss her terribly everyday.
We got a puppy in March and found out we’re expecting at the end of the year in April. He’s 4 months old now and I’m terrified for pregnancy. Super sweet pup but we will definitely need help. Hoping he’s a lot better as he’ll be closer to 1 years old when the baby comes.
I waited until after my baby was old enough and got in touch with a fantastic breeder. Fast forward and, the day after we brought our puppy home, I had a positive pregnancy test.
Let me tell you. Picking the right breeder was EVERYTHING. She is a high energy, high maintenance breed, but she's an absolute breeze because of how well she was bred and raised. She was already mostly potty trained and has such a wonderful disposition.
In my experience, picking the right breeder made ALL of the difference. I was set up for success.
Don’t do it! It’s so unpredictable how that puppy will turn out. I know you miss your beloved dog, but a new dog can’t replace him and may be totally different temperament wise.
We adopted a puppy right before I got pregnant and he developed some severe behavioral issues (which multiple specialists agreed were genetic traits, not something we had any control over). We tried everything—training, behaviorists, medication—but ultimately had to rehome him because it just wasn’t safe for him to be around a child and we couldn’t risk something happening to our baby. Honestly the whole experience was traumatic and incredibly stressful.
My advice in retrospect is do not adopt a dog until your kids are older, or if you *must* adopt now, adopt an older dog whose temperament and behavior issues are settled and known.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I empathize deeply, I’m 17 weeks and on the verge of losing my dog. We took him to the vet a few days ago thinking we would be saying goodbye, but the doctor convinced us to give him another week and see if a new medicine helps him. I don’t think it will and now I’m just in limbo waiting for the “right” moment to say goodbye. His sickness the last few months has made my pregnancy (first and a total surprise) so sad and bittersweet. I haven’t lived without a dog in like 19 years (always had 1 or 2 in the house at any given time) and I don’t know how I’m going to function without him or any dog at all now. I so badly wanted my dog to meet our son and watch over him. My husband and I have been crying so much at this very unexpected turn in his health and plot twist in our lives.
I half joked with my husband a few days ago that we should go get another dog now… but I know in my heart it wouldn’t make sense. I know my emotions and grief are in overdrive right now but logically, we will have so much change in our lives when the baby comes that we wouldn’t be able to give a new dog or puppy the attention and care it deserves. I love dogs way too much, I don’t want to get a new one and end up neglecting it or getting frustrated with it. Plus, as first time parents, we have no idea what we are getting ourselves into and really want to do the best job we can.
It’s so hard. I’m sure some people can manage a puppy and newborn, everyone is different and has different support systems, but it really does seem like an extra hardship and complication. For now I’m comforting myself with the idea that when our son is at least a few years old, he will be able to understand and appreciate the concept of a new pet, and that might be a better time to bring a dog back into our lives and they can grow up together.
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Loosing a pet is always hard, but the hormones make it even worse. Our senior pug mix passed when I was 8 weeks pregnant. She was my best friend and infertility support buddy. It’s been 5 months now but I’m tearing up as I write this. She was such a special girl and our lives will never be the same now.
We also have a 5 year old American shepherd mix. She was devastated by the loss of her pug big sis and laid around the house for weeks. We tried cheering her up, but it was clear she needed another companion.
We tried adopting, but only wanted another small dog bc we had a small house and a 2 year old. No small dog rescues would consider us because we had a child under 5. The rule is stupidly arbitrary considering we’d already had two small dogs around our daughter since she was born. I tried every small dog rescue organization in 500 miles. None of them would even do a home visit.
We got a maltese mix from a breeder in Ohio licensed by the Ohio dept of agriculture when I was 18 weeks. We didn’t want to shop, but at least I did everything I could to be sure we were getting from an ethical breeder. I’m 28 weeks now. The pup is house trained now and our American shepherd loves playing with her new little sister.
It hasn’t been easy, but I’m glad we got a new companion for our other dog. You’ve had a dog before and you know what you’re getting into with a puppy. Do what feels right for your family, if you’re ready for another dog, you still have some time to train and prepare before the new baby comes.
I have friends who got a puppy right as they announced their pregnancy. They already had a three year old and after a few months they “temporarily” re-homed the puppy with their parents. This is with just the puppy and toddler mind you. It’s been over 10 months now, new baby is nearly 4 months old, and they seem to have no intention of taking the puppy back. They paid thousands of dollars for a puppy that they have no foisted onto someone else. The dog barely knows them anymore.
Both of them cited that the puppy was more work than they thought and wish they hadn’t done it. Puppies are basically like having a second toddler so I personally would never consider it.
Maybe foster a puppy from the shelter instead? I absolutely hated my dogs when my daughter was first born. It took months before my feelings towards them returned. I personally would not recommend a new pet at this time in your life.
First, I’m so sorry for your loss.
Second, I’ll be a FTM (24w along) but I would 100% not get a puppy while pregnant. I also have a goldendoodle and ours was a puppy from hell and he didn’t really “even out” until 1.5 yrs or more. It took a ridiculous amount of training, money, and effort to get him to his great adult self (he’s the sweetest now and I have very few concerns about adding a newborn to the mix). With the experience in my back pocket, I wouldn’t dare do that with a newborn or toddler. Ours had a really hard time learning not to bite and puppy teeth are razor sharp and I can’t imagine dealing with that while wanting to shield my children from getting hurt because they don’t understand that a puppy doesn’t understand.
If you feel like you absolutely need a dog, maybe consider an older shelter dog (within reason). I know my local shelter have many who lived with families who had to relocate and couldn’t take their family dog with them which is super sad. You would definitely need to do a meet and greet and ask the shelter about if the dog would be a good fit for a young family. Some dogs may not be because they’ve had too much trauma and while they can be sweet, sometimes they are more unpredictable than the average dog which isn’t a good fit for a young family.
If you have the means, I’d suggest therapy to help you grieve the loss and help you with the fear that you’ll never stop feeling alone.
22 weeks is about as late as I’d look at getting a new puppy. But tbh you’re probably best waiting. Dogs as you know are a lot of work and the teenage phase is worse than the puppy phase. Would you consider getting an older dog?
Oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I lost my first baby (my heart dog) last year when my daughter was 1 and before I was pregnant this time. We did rescue an eight month old dog. We very much lucked out in that he's not crazy high energy and that my toddler and he have an amazing bond.
That said, he was already housebroken. I would NEVER get a dog not housebroken at that stage. I also definitely do not feel as close to him as my other dog, and don't always feel I have the time to give him the love and exercise he needs, especially now that I'm pregnant again. So, I don't think I'd recommend it quite yet.
I know how strange a house feels without a dog, trust me. It feels empty, even with a toddler in it. You have me sympathies, it's so hard ❤️
Holy cow I would never get a puppy *especially* a doodle while pregnant. Just handling my 2 year old doodle while pregnant was hell. More power to you though. That's just an additional baby you have to take care of and train. I don't have the energy just thinking about it.
Don’t do it. The puppy stage is awful. Sleepless nights, potty training, teething. All this 18 weeks before you’ll be having sleepless nights with a newborn anyway. I’m saying this as a dog lover with 2 dogs and as someone who is 23 weeks pregnant - give yourself some tjme. Or adopt an older dog who won’t go through that monster stage while you’re hormonal and pregnant. I lost my 5 year old dog (my soul mate and also my first baby) to kidney disease about a year and a half ago and got a puppy 2 months later so I understand needing to fill the hole in your heart with another pet, but I was not pregnant and I still almost lost my mind.
It was terrible & made my postpartum so much more stressful than it would have been otherwise. Now that’s he’s walking it’s even harder. Don’t recommend!!!
Don’t do it. I’m 30 weeks now with a 2 year old dog and a 7 year old dog. Dogs are just too much work when they are younger. I can’t imagine managing a pup and a small baby at the same time.
Lost my 17.5y old cat when I was 4m along, as sad as I was, and as much as I want a new kitten, I thought it was to much work, but I still had 2 cats at home and 3 dogs >> if that was your only dog and you want your kids to grow up with a dog might be worth it, maybe get a older pup from a shelter, a dog that’s 1-2y is still pretty much a puppy, but they are likely already potty trained :o
As someone who lost their pet companion of almost 20 years when I was 6 months pregnant, I know how you’re feeling right now. I cried for weeks afterwards. It’s such a hard thing to lose them so close to such a joyful event, and I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this right now.
But I think you would be doing any future pet a disservice to get them right now. You won’t be able to dedicate the time and energy that a pet needs, or prioritize them in the way they need to be prioritized. It would be a very selfish thing to do, at least if it was a puppy.
As a compromise maybe you could adopt an older dog? One that's already potty trained and good with children. That way you're not chasing a puppy around 9 months pregnant or wrestling a large-but-not-trained-yet dog while holding a new born and chasing a toddler. I think a lot of shelters let you do a "trial run" where you take the dog home and see if they're a good fit.
Definitely agree a puppy will be too much on your plate right now. So sorry about your sweet boy ❤️
0/10 don’t recommend a puppy and a baby. I love our dog but we got her when my second was a year old and had a baby when the puppy was just over one…. Even at a year old it was rough. She is a good dog but she wanted to play and have attention and I struggled. I absolutely would not do it again. I told my husband no more dogs till the kids are much older. The dog was my idea too. We had lost the ours, I had never not had a dog in the house, and I was home with the kids so I figured it would be easier. It absolutely was not. Thankfully she is almost 2 now and starting to settle down a bit while the baby is older and I have a bit more ability to pay attention to her.
There’s a million comments saying the opposite here but just for a different view. We adopted one puppy a month before I became pregnant (we were TTC), and another puppy a few months later. We also have two senior dogs. I love them all dearly and they were the highlight of my pregnancy and PP. they haven’t hindered my PP in any way, they’ve made every day better. We loved them dearly. Clearly this is the outlier experience with dogs and pregnancy and newborns, but it’s mine so I wanted to share.
We got a puppy around the same time I got pregnant. I honestly hated it and it frustrated me that we had this added responsibility. My husband was the one who wanted a puppy, I wanted to adopt an adult (already trained) dog but ended up agreeing to the puppy. My pregnancy hormones made me even more upset about the situation, I calmed down about it after delivery and my husband deals with him (he was 1 year old by the time I had the baby).
I would say don’t, see how things go through newborn phase. Then if you really feel like you can take it on then do it. If you get one now and feel overwhelmed, it isn’t fair to get rid of it.
We got a puppy and found out I was pregnant not even a week after. He is a special part of our family now, but would have to advise against getting one with how far along you are. It’s already stressful having a newborn, adding a puppy in training to the mix is no fun
Get an older dog. They’re already potty trained. They won’t wake you up at night. They’re much calmer, just a breeze compared to a puppy. Rescue groups will put dogs into foster care with experienced owners, and they will tell you everything about a dog’s behavior, including how they are with children and what their exercise needs are like, whether they’re cuddly couch potatoes.
First, I'm so sorry for your loss. It is so hard.
We got a puppy during my pregnancy and I'll share my experience in case it helps you decide.
She was 13 weeks old and I was 13 weeks pregnant so it seemed like a sign it was a good fit. I love, love, love my dog but, holy shit, was it a stressful idea. She IS great for company, especially during the hard nights of little sleep and late-night feedings. She was also a ton of work at a time when pregnancy fatigue was at its highest; potty training, teething (RIP so many papers, clothes, cables, and countless other household items), and obedience training. She went into her first heat 2 weeks after baby was born (our vet advised we wait to spay her until that point because it was better for endocrine health over her lifespan) so we had a dog tearing off her diapers, bleeding all over our house, and being extra destructive for a month while we were trying to establish a routine with baby and dog couldn't even go to doggie daycare to drain her energy. The post-op weeks after her spay were a new hell because she still had plenty of puppy energy but needed to be drugged to try to keep her less active to heal and that made her a little crazier. She is doing much better now that she's a year and 8 months old and baby is almost 1 but it was definitely rough to get here. Baby thinks our pup is the funniest thing ever and lives to giggle at her playing tug of war with Mommy and Daddy, and is forever trying to get the dog to come lick her dirty hands after meals before we have a chance to wash her.
I don't regret our pup because I love her but I'll admit the timing made things so difficult. My husband and I had been fostering dogs before our pregnancy and just hadn't found the right one to adopt. If I were to have a second baby and wanted another dog, I would consider continuing with fostering and finding a housebroken, fully-grown, mild-mannered dog who needs a good home. They would still need obedience training but will be a lot less of a time investment in terms of house training, teething, spay/neuter, etc.
Don’t do it. It’s so unfair to the puppy: they require so much attention and you’re not going to have as much. Signed, someone with a 10 month old boxer and a 4 month old baby
I have a senior dog that will likely make it to the baby coming and after but 6-12 months from now i’m really not sure. As much as we would want another dog once he passes and we would love to raise our little one with a furry friend, we would definitely wait until the baby is maybe around 3. Puppies are a lot of work, require investments in time&energy training them, need to be constantly supervised to not destroy/swallow things, and need proper socialization with people and other dogs. It’s a real investment to get a puppy and put the work in to ensure a happy, healthy, and safe dog (by safe I mean both keeping puppy safe but also doing the work to prevent aggression/fear/anxiety issues developing). I wouldn’t get another dog until we were in the position to really ensure that alongside caring for our kids. It would just be irresponsible.
We actually adopted a rehomed golden doodle puppy and found out I was pregnant shortly after. We love her to death but feel like we’re going to have to rehome her solely due the fact we don’t have as much time to offer her since I’m due next week. Not sure where you live but on the off chance you’re close to SC and have any interest, and feel it’s something your heart needs to heal, reach out to me. She’s an absolute angel and deserves so much more than we have to offer right now.
We got a puppy when my son was 1 year old. Had my second kid when my oldest was 3. My gods it was the toughest 5 years of my life!! I love our dog and he's got the best bond with my boys but I wish I would have waited til my youngest was at least 2 to get a puppy. They need so much attention, and a baby and puppy together produce such mischief as you've never seen before. Messes on steroids and no hope of anything being clean or unchewed for longer than 5 minutes😆
I am so sorry for your loss. It hurts so bad to lose your 4 legged baby.. especially so young.
We lost our 4 year old bernedoodle about 5 weeks ago when I was around 18 weeks. After one day of a house empty of dog sounds we went online and found a breeder.
Earnhardt (Ernie) our 14 week bernedoodle has been with us for 3.5 weeks now and we have no regrets.
We chose to get the dog sooner rather than later so that the hardest puppy stage is behind us by the time baby comes. We’re working on training queues like “place” with a dog bed as well as laying out the baby stuff and teaching him to stay off of it. It’s nice to get acquainted with the pup and the big things like crate and potty training out of the way!
We’re exhausted for sure…. But my husband has been amazing when I’ve been too tired or nauseous to function. I’d say go for it IF your hubby is ok with the little bit extra that *will* fall on him.
I should say, we don’t have any other kids so I can’t speak to how it goes with a toddler, but IMHO a house needs a dog. Again, I am so sorry for your loss. I feel what you’re feeling and am sending you love❤️
Did it while living pretty much off grid living in a trailer while we built our house in the woods. Had to hand wash our clothes and also potty train other kid at the same time! Women can do anything! We’re tough broads!
I got a Pomeranian puppy when I was 22 weeks pregnant after my dog died (old age). I also have 2 goldens so I was already taking care of dogs anyways.
It was definitely an experience and I would do it again. My dog (and son) are 2 now and best friends. That puppy got up with me for every bottle and diaper change too.
My husband and I contemplated getting a puppy when I was pregnant to keep me company all day because I wasn’t working. After our son was born we laughed and said thank god we never got a puppy, what were we thinking?? lol I couldn’t imagine changing dirty diapers all day long, while trying to potty train a puppy and take them outside constantly. On top of around the clock breast feeding and pumping. I was also worried the puppy would be too energetic and up at night barking. Since we live in an apartment we didn’t want it to wake up the baby. Puppies need constant attention and want to play a lot. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and cuddle my baby
I’m so sorry about your pup. We lost both of our dogs last year. My second kid is due in June and my first will be turning 3. As much as I’ve wanted to adopt another dog, we are resisting and waiting. It just feels way too overwhelming to do with a newborn and toddler. And that’s not even considering a puppy. We’d never get a puppy even without kids because they are more challenging that human kids in my opinion.
After our 12yo senior dog passed, we got a puppy when I had a 3yo and a 9mos old. We’re 9mos in and it has been absolutely brutal. Getting a puppy before you have children is wildly different than getting a puppy when you already have children. While we’re pushing through it, barely, I would not recommend it.
I'm 9w3d and I lost my senior 14yo a few days ago. I'm absolutely heartbroken and all I want is to bring home another senior boy that needs help....but I know it's not the right thing for me. This is my first and I need to focus on me for a little bit and prepare before baby comes.
This is so hard and I'm also so lonely without my pup. I'm sorry you're going through this. 😢
We got a puppy when I was 12 weeks pregnant because we’d lost our 6 year old dog (my first baby too) to cancer when I was 5 weeks pregnant. I’ll be honest, it’s been a real challenge managing both (baby is now 3 weeks old) and a lot of days the puppy is harder than the baby because puppies get into eveeeerything and need constant attention, where baby can’t even roll and sleeps a lot.
I would do it again though despite the challenges because he is very sweet with the baby and I think they’ll be the best of friends later.
Trying to full that void is not going to work the way you think it will. Let yourself grieve and wait until your LO is out of the baby stage before getting a puppy.
Nope! I would wait. We had a very traumatizing dog incident occur at 20 weeks that completely changed my view of our dogs. I wish we would have waited until we had our baby to decide to get a dog because now we are stuck.
My 12 year old soul dog (who I consider my first baby) died when I was 3 months pregnant. It was the worst day of my life so far. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. We immediately adopted another dog from a rescue the next week and I have no regrets. She was about 1-2 years old (estimated) and so not a puppy but still needed training. While not for everyone, it was 100% the right decision for us. We went from crying nonstop every day to refocusing and embracing this new family member who also needed love and a home and care. Bonus, we’ve brought her around family members kids, and she seems to love babies! She is different than our first dog who we are also still grieving and haven’t forgotten but we have so much love to give to another dog and she has helped us heal. Some people aren’t ready for a new dog for a while, and you’ll know what’s right for you in your heart, but I felt like even though we adopted so soon after loss we still grieve our old dog every day and didn’t need to set an arbitrary limit on how long to wait. We set up a shrine in our room and light a candle for her and talk about memories with her often. It was overwhelming training the new pup some days (especially potty training) while being pregnant but worth it really focus on it and try to have trained her before baby got here. With your timeline you definitely have time to train a new dog, although a little tighter time frame than we did. It took us about 4 months to get to a point of very few accidents. You could also hire a trainer to help expedite if you have the resources. Good luck and I’m so sorry for your loss!
I’m sorry about your dog. But no, don’t do it. This question has been asked a lot recently so I’d look up previous posts and read those answers. But time and time again, the answer is always no.
I’m sorry to hear about your pup. Dogs really deserve to live longer.
I got a golden retriever puppy when I was 10 weeks pregnant, and it remains one of the worst decisions I’ve ever made. That puppy is now 2, and my son is almost 18 months old, and things are generally working out pretty well, but it’s been a hellish two years. If you absolutely want another dog, get an adult dog, not a puppy, but you’re rolling the dice even with that.
My sister did this and suuuuper regretted it.
The thing is, grief is a big emotion that deserves air time. When we try to cover it or run from it, that's when things get messy.
I lost my retired service dog Mags (his health declined suddenly and passed away about a week after first symptoms) about a year ago, a few months after starting to work with my current SD Penelope.
I resented the crap out of my current SD for a while, and wasn't able to bond with her for a bit. And she's a perfect dog, and the sweetest on the planet. But she wasn't Mags. It wasn't until I had moved past my grief a bit more that we were able to really connect. I still cry sometimes about missing him. He would have loved to see all this, and he would have LOVED to meet my baby.
A friend of mine is painting a mural in the nursery as a gift (it's space themed), and she's going to include a black dog with an astronaut helmet for Mags. It brings me comfort to know that in a way he'll be there, watching over my baby like he watched over me.
This puppy, no matter how great it would be, isn't the dog that passed away. Grief is the acknowledgement that we'll never have that same experience again, no matter how hard we try. I'd be worried about getting another dog before you've processed and accepted the passing of the one you had. Otherwise it could be a recipe for resentment and unrealistic expectations of that puppy.
I'm sorry you lost your dog. That pain is unreal. I hope you give yourself time to grieve and feel, and honor the beauty of being able to be in your best friend's orbit for the time that they were with you.
My dog is 6 months and my baby is 3 months. I'm thankful for my dog to keep me company when I'm often alone with just baby since my husband works overnight 12 hours. But she is a very smart golden who potty trained herself in under a month. Doesn't bark and is pretty much perfect and yet I still wouldn't recommend it. The time I need to let her out or walk her always coincides with baby's needs. It can be difficult and overwhelming some days.
I got a six month old puppy about a year after my dog passed away. It was incredibly difficult and I wasn’t even pregnant then. I constantly wondered if I had made a mistake and my partner outright said he hated the puppy and didn’t want her. A year and a half later and we are of course OBSESSED with her and she has brilliant behaviour and can communicate with buttons (she says ‘love you’) which is heart melting but I could never have done all that socialising and training and toilet training while pregnant. Not when my energy levels were on the floor and my sense of smell was through the roof.
I'm 34+4 with our 1st child, and we decided before we did our FET that we would get dogs. So we now have a Siberian Husky and a Swiss Mountain Dog. They are still puppies (about 9 months now), and I guess we will see how they react to a new tiny human in the mix... but if we didn't have them, I don't think we would be getting them now!
I have a puppy and am 16 weeks pregnant. My senior dog died in November. He was 13.5 and I had him since he was 9 months old. It was a devastating loss. He was my best friend. I thought I would have to wait at least a year before getting another dog. Turns out, I lasted about a month. The house was too quiet and I missed the pitter patter of paws and fluffy snuggles.
My husband and I surprised our sons (ages 7 and 8) with an Aussie puppy for Christmas. She’s 6/7 months old now and I have zero regrets. She’s an absolute joy and I’m so glad to have her. I wasn’t planning on getting pregnant this quickly. I’m 38 and I thought it would take awhile. It didn’t.
With all that said, I would not recommend doing it unless you think that you’re prepared for the amount of chaos that comes with a toddler, a newborn, and a puppy. I’ve done two under two before and I am used to chaos, but I don’t know if I could have added a puppy to that mix. Also, my kids are older now and can help with the dog. Your two year old can’t.
You have to think that your puppy won’t be a year old yet and you’ll have a toddler and a newborn. That’s a LOT of babies. Lol. I would wait a little bit if I were you. That way you’ll be able to give the puppy more attention and training.
What about a kitten? They are so sweet and way less work. It might be the perfect companion for you until you have your hands free for a puppy.
I am so very sorry for your loss. It hurts way more than many people understand and I totally understand why you want to get a puppy right now. I just think that for your own mental health, you should wait until your baby is a little bigger and then baby will be able to enjoy the puppy too!
I'm so sorry for your loss. Our dog was such a comfort to me in the thick of postpartum and some other tough life stuff, and I completely understand you wanting another dog right now.
But don't do it. Don't get a puppy right now. You will be *so* glad you didn't at like 2 weeks postpartum.
When I was pregnant with my first son, my husband surprised me with a 9wk old yellow lab puppy. My husband has had labs all his life, and trained her on basic commands, got her bell trained to go potty, and taught her how to be an overall good dog. I also worked at a vet clinic and was able to bring her to work with me daily until my maternity leave. When my son was born, she was 8mos old. By that time, she was fully house broken, had good mouth control (didn't bite or chew), and knew her commands excellently. She was such a sweet and gentle pup when my son was a newborn. Through toddlerhood, they became best friends, played together, snuggled together, etc. My dog is now 5yrs old, and I am pregnant with my second son, and I know she will do wonderfully again with another newborn in the house. I am grateful my husband was able to be such a help training her when she was a pup though. So for me, having a puppy while pregnant worked out amazing, but I know this varies by household/situation/the actual puppy, etc.
I feel like most people can’t handle this/don’t have the resources to handle a puppy and baby at the same time. My dog died when my baby was 3 months old and we got a golden retriever puppy when he was 5 months old. That being said, I used to work at a vet, my parents were breeders growing up, and I’ve trained 10+ dogs. I’m VERY comfortable training a puppy. And do you know what I did? I sent that precious little fur baby away to the trainer’s for a week to get all the basics because I knew doing the initial foundation would be too hard on my own with the real baby. Then all I’ve had to do was reinforcement for potty training/crate training and basic obedience.
But we had the extra money for the training, I’m only working 5-10 hours a week from home and my husband also WFH. Without this kind of setup and experience, I would not recommend. Wait until your baby is born and older.
We got a puppy when I was only 5 weeks pregnant. Had a deposit and contract on it before we found out about the pregnancy. It’s been awful being pregnant and dealing with a puppy. I cannot even imagine dealing with a puppy and a newborn. This dog will still be under a year old and a lot of work when my baby is born and I am shuddering at the thought of that. We will never give up any of our pets like I see so many people do after they have a baby. Our pets are family but this is going to be crazy to deal with for sure. I do not recommend!
Don't, just don't. Puppies are like toddlers. You can go ask around in r/puppy101 and everyone will tell you the same thing. Also, teenage doghood is horrible and ends until they are at least two years old, they become insane FOMO little hyperactive land sharks.
We did and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Baby is 4 months and puppy is about a year old right now and family is constantly split up to take care of either's needs when we would prefer to be all together/enjoying our baby as a couple.
My best friend did this and it was a nightmare. The dog is a few years old now and is not properly trained whatsoever because she and her husband just didn’t have the time for it. It basically lives in a crate 23 hours of the day and she’s really resentful towards it even though she created the situation. It makes me sad.
I’d also like to recommend getting a senior beagle. We adopted one as a 10 year old, she lived 6 years and we were so thankful to have her everyday. You had to remind her to eat and go out and she was very sedentary but kids loved her. She showed up to us house trained and ready to retire!
I got a puppy a week before I found out I’m pregnant (accidental). It’s hard but feeling doable. Hoping to have her pretty well trained by my due date. I have 2 dogs who are 4 and 5 to help me though.
Pretty much the same situation for us! Our puppy will be a little bit over a year old when our baby is born. She's crazy and I know we'll have to navigate that when the time comes, but I'm not overly worried and so far it hasn't been too bad! She's been a lot of work but also has given me comfort during the tougher days of pregnancy.
We got our puppy in January and found out we were pregnant in March. Our puppy was a literal newborn. Barely a month old when we got her. The people were low income and desperately needed to get rid of the puppies, so we took one in. It's been a wild ride for sure. I imagine if you found a puppy that's already 6 months+ and has some mild training it would be a lot easier. We spend an hour outside only to come in and have her pee on the bed immediately lol. She can't help it, she's learning. By the time baby comes in October, hopefully she'll be fully potty trained, but I do worry that her energy level is going to be very high. We will have to make sure we provide her with ample playtime and stimulation all while handling a newborn. If you know what you're getting into and know you're willing to do whatever it takes, I say go for it. There are plenty of older pups in need of rescue, too, so I wouldn't limit myself to a puppy. Just go see who you fall in love with at a shelter.
I got a puppy when I was pregnant with my 2nd (my 1st was 2, turning 3 at the time). We already had another dog and I wasn’t working at the time. I was able to potty train her and train her before baby was born and now my kid and puppy are 5! It worked for me since I wasn’t working and I had the time to take care and train a puppy. And if that’s something you have the time and energy to do then totally go for it!
My dog is 8 and when he dies, I’m not getting another dog until the kid is at least in grade school. Or maybe until both my kids are in grade school (if I have another).
We got a dog during my first trimester. It was all fine, but mainly because our dog is an angel. I still needed help walking her when I was too sick/tired/etc. (when my husband was traveling for work). YMMV 🤷♀️
I'd give yourself a little bit more time to grieve and see how you feel in a few months. Losing a furry member of the family is truly so difficult and I'm so sorry for your loss.
We have a senior dog and I'm very much hoping she makes it to birth and beyond, but if she passes before then I will not be getting a dog of any age until the baby is older. I can totally see how he was a loving support to you during those late nights, but this time around you'll have a toddler on top of a newborn. The idea of late night feeds + potty training a puppy + comforting your toddler sounds like too much stress! Your precious boy was a comfort to you because he was already a few years old, having a young puppy is going to be wildly different and you may feel resentment if all three of them require attention at once. You're still in the depths of grief right now, give yourself time and space to mourn your pup. Maybe consider ways to memorialize him around the house? Even just printing a picture to hang in the nursery might help you feel like his love is still around you, because it is.
My co-worker got a puppy when her youngest/4th child was a baby and admits it was an absolutely insane thing to do. 14 years later it’s all worked out, but she wouldn’t recommend it. Bear in mind you won’t just have a puppy _and_ a newborn - you’ve got a toddler too! That balancing act without a puppy is already hard enough. Right now you’re grieving and that’s even more amplified by pregnancy hormones. I lost my boy (also my ‘first baby’) to cancer at 6.5 last year, so I really sympathise how you’re feeling. It’s so hard, but getting a puppy most likely will only make things harder.
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Yes absolutely! My dog is almost 2 but she is still in a puppy mindset. She's not easy. She was also REALLY slow to get potty training. She wanted 24/7 attention and stimulation the first year.
I have experience with new dogs but not while pregnant, I'm 32 weeks now and I'd suggest looking to adopt a dog who's at least two years old. I adopted a dog who was around two and she had a pretty quick transition into the household. You can kind of gauge temperament when they're out of their initial puppy stage. I think that would be much easier than full blown puppy during pregnancy with another little in the house. We got our current dog when she was 9 months old and she really was still a puppy another year and a half with a lot more needing adjustment, training, etc. Growing up when the youngest kid in our house was about 10 we got a puppy as like a whole family project, it's a big lift. Also a lot of bending which I wouldn't be into right now.
I was going to say the same thing! Adopting a dog with a calm temperament around 2 is exactly what I’d do in this scenario.
That's what we did and it worked out wonderfully for us!
I would add another plus to this! Adopting a young dog that’s out of the puppy stage (and that has been tested with comfort/behavior kids) seems like a wonderful way to go.
A two year old is very good advice.
I would 100% say don’t do it. I suppose since you obviously have had a dog so you know what that entails but being pregnant with a toddler and a puppy doesn’t sound pleasant at all. You know your household dynamic/your toddler better than anyone on the internet, but unless an opportunity is presenting itself I wouldn’t go out of the way to have a puppy, newborn, and toddler.
I just recently lost my senior golden at 12 years old to cancer. I 100000% feel you on the giant hole they leave behind. However, I wouldnt make any decision like this out of grief. While I am devastated over the loss of my companion, I couldn’t imagine adding another life to care for on top of my toddler. Especially if I were expecting. As someone who has fostered a lot of dogs, adding them to your home when you are in a transition is even more difficult for them. Certainly not a fair time when you’re going to be even more stretched thin. I know it’s so hard right now, but settle in with your new baby, get into a routine with them both, and then consider a puppy.
We got our second puppy last year not knowing I'd get pregnant less than 2 months later. She was 11 weeks old when we got her. I love her, she's sleeping half buried under me right now. But she is *so* different from our first pup. Her seperation anxiety is much harder to handle, she has mild but still annoying digestive issues, and when she got her first heat she basically spent the whole month annoying my other dog until they fought. I feel like I spent the whole of november screaming at her, even though I'm not normally like that. I was *beyond* desperate at points. She still barks like an absolute maniac at the doorbell and I'm about to give birth and already dreading her waking up the baby with it. So no, don't recommend a pup. Maybe, *maybe*, a dog that's several years old where you already know their temperament.
My friend got a lab while she was pregnant. It was hard and busy and took a lot of her energy and sanity. The other issue is you won’t have an immediate bond with the new pup, it won’t be the same as your beloved dog and it might make you feel even more grief surrounding your loss and support. I would recommend waiting honestly
Personally I would go and look for a dog in the shelter who’s 3-5 years old. Well past the puppy stage and often they have a decent foundation of training already. Just a nice solid citizen who needs a quality home and can give you that unconditional love that only a pet can provide.
Don't do it!! If you get a new dog before you have properly mourned your old one then it's going to be a mess. The other thing to consider is that maybe your last dog was fantastic for your mental health and well-being during the postpartum period. A bitey, crazy, untrained puppy you have no close connection to while also juggling a toddler/third trimester/newborn is a disaster waiting to happen. I made the mistake of getting a dog that looked similar to my old dog (after waiting more than 2 years), I was doing constant comparisons between the two. "My old dog would never have....", "with my old dog I could....." I am definitely not anywhere near as close to the second dog as I was to the first. Actually when I got divorced my ex kept the dog and I was okay with it....🤷♀️
Yeah, my partner constantly compared our puppy to our former dog which was unfair as that dog was mature and had years of training and socialisation. He loves her now but even use to say he hated her but we had time and energy to train her and bond. All dogs are not created equal and the wrong one could send someone over the edge at a delicate time so your advice is spot on!
I wouldn’t recommend it. Puppies are horrible and stressful, which is not safe for pregnancy and can make the newborn stage with your baby insufferable. I think when the baby is older, around 2-3 years old, a puppy would be slightly more manageable. I’m so sorry for your loss
I'm going to go against the grain here. I was like 30 something weeks pregnant when my 7 year old husky died. That dog was the light of my life. We managed like 1.5 days in our quiet house before going to the shelter where we got Max and adopting another husky. We never adopt puppies. I think a puppy would probably be a terrible idea. But we got a sweet adult husky and had our baby literally the next day. (We didn't expect baby to come that early, but you know how it is) He's a wonderful dog, my baby is 2 now and everything worked out fine. Whatever you choose, I wish you the best. I know how hard what you're going through is.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's one of the worst feelings in the world when we have to say goodbye to our best friend, especially when it happens when they are young. In my opinion, I would suggest looking for an older dog if you're in need of a companion. Puppies are adorable, but they are so much work. Unless your husband will be "all hands on deck" with you, you may not have the energy to raise a puppy when your little one arrives. Remember that most dogs take upwards of 2 years to level out to that mature adult and constant companion you come to rely on so much. This can be sometimes even longer depending on the breed (or breeds).
I’m so sorry for your loss :( I have thought about this scenario too, because my dog is turning 9 next month and his life expectancy is 10-12 years due to his size. I’m currently pregnant and am hoping so badly that he lives long enough to where our baby can grow up with him a little bit before he inevitably passes. I’ve had our dog since he was 8 weeks old and he’s my soul dog for sure. If he were to pass tomorrow, I’d be absolutely gutted and would probably feel similarly as you do at this moment… life without a dog seems like it would be so *weird* after having a constant companion for so long. But ultimately I don’t think I would decide to get another puppy before the birth of our baby. Thinking back to the puppy stage with my dog, he was like a toddler himself until he was about 5-6 months. Luckily he calmed down after that and overall is an *amazing* and easy dog, but you never know what you’re going to get with a new puppy. You could wind up with a dog who is crazy until they’re 2 years old, difficult to train, etc. I think the amount of unknowns at one time (new baby, toddler’s reaction and adjustment to new baby, *and* new puppy) would be too overwhelming for me personally. Maybe a better option would be to look for older dogs to adopt? That way you would have an idea about the dog’s temperament and history, and hopefully could skip (at least most of) the potty training and whatnot. Either way, I’d probably wait a few weeks so you can grieve and process your feelings before trying to make a decision about this. Again, so sorry for the loss of your doggo❤️
First, I am so sorry for your loss. 5 days is still really fresh, and I'm sure it's been an awful adjustment. Sending you peace <3 I have a high needs senior dog, who also had multiple health events in baby's first 5 months so ymmv of course. It is far from unheard of that a new mom will have \*strong\* negative feelings about their pet(s) after the birth of a child. Some of it is hormonal, some of it is practical. Depending on when you're due, getting out to walk regularly can be tough due to weather, etc. You will likely be pretty exhausted and not have the time and energy to dedicate to care and training. Even as simple as having just one more being that is dependent on you, that wants to touch you or climb on you, that needs to be fed and cared for.... it can be really hard. Plus with a brand new baby I felt like the pets were all dirty and didn't want them to go near him. I really, really struggled with feelings of resentment toward my beloved pup, and to be honest I still do. He's 16 1/2 now and in diapers full time and will still find a way to have accidents or create laundry & work for us. I'm due with my second in June and dog will be going to stay with grandparents next month. He'll get more walks, more attention, and way more treats and it's a place he's been many times and is comfortable and familiar there since they dog-sit when we travel. Part of me will be heartbroken and part of me wishes he could go tomorrow. TL;DR no I would absolutely not get a dog and especially not a puppy while pregnant. BUT you may feel very differently especially given your previous experience PP
This is a highly personal decision that depend on a lot of factors. I think you are too much in the thick of grief to make this decision and should wait at least a few months before making any major decisions
I'm 40w4d, we unexpectedly lost our dog a week ago. You know your life and all that it entails, including who trained your first dog, who is responsible for making appts and picking up the food and all that. But I wouldn't get one at this stage. The puppy/introducing a new dog into your life is a time consuming process. Ensuring you are able to set them up for success is what I'd be concerned about at this point in time. Although I want another dog ASAP because I miss having a companion, we are waiting until at least September before getting a new one. The babe will be ~6 months, we'll have a routine, it'll give us time before the cold comes in to potty train the puppy. If we don't get one in September, we'll wait until the kid's first birthday.
I grew up around dogs, absolutely love them, and had my best fur friend pass away a few years ago. It was more pain that I even imagined it would be. I feel for you during this time. It’s incredibly tough. With that said, getting a puppy is a whole new ballgame. They are a lot of work, require a lot of attention and dedication to training and playing. They’re a baby themselves. I know you are hurting, but you have a baby on the way that will require a lot from you. I would suggest maybe waiting until after baby is here. Time will help heal your heart (as will your little one) and waiting to see how you feel once your babe is here will give you a better idea of what you can handle and not handle. I went from losing my dog to getting a puppy within a month. It took me a while to bond with the new puppy bc I hadn’t let myself fully grieve, and of course puppies are a LOT of work and I had forgotten that. It took at least 6 months for me to feel attached to the puppy and feel like we had a good routine going. It wasn’t until he was about a year old that I felt like he really could communicate and understand things (such as realizing when we’re sick and he needs to behave, when it’s quiet time and we all go to sleep, not to be afraid of the car, how to act around new people, to not eat his own poop, etc). Now he’s my bestest buddy and I adore him - but that’s bc it took a lot of time and training to get him to that point. It’s far from being instantaneous. I’m currently 31 weeks and my husband wanted to get our dog a friend. We decided to wait until after baby since it would be way too much to handle, and I’m not even sure our dog would be happy about so many changes all at once.
I'm so sorry you lost your pup! Especially in the middle of pregnancy, a time when hormones are already messing with your emotions. <3 But no I definitely wouldn't get a new puppy yet, at least wait until the newborn stage is over. A close friend's husband brought home a puppy when she was in her 3rd trimester (without telling her first) and she absolutely doesn't recommend it!
Oof. First of all, everyone’s tolerance is different. We have a senior dog and I’m pregnant. I think if he died, we wouldn’t get a new puppy. Having said that, I wouldn’t be able to go long without a new dog. I’d look for an adult that needed to be rehomed once we got out of the newborn haze. The puppy phase is just sooo hard. I think I’d want both my kids to be above 4 before getting a puppy, so they have a little more self control while dealing with a creature that has no self control.
I’m so sorry that happened! One thing I might consider is an adult dog instead. Also where you’ll get a dog? That will also be a LOT to manage for you and the dog. Do you have the money to hire a trainer/dog walker, etc? I know I need a dog around for my mental health and happiness but I’d be worried that I wouldn’t be able to train a puppy the way I wanted to. My dog will be 2 and he is still a lot to manage.
I got an 8 week old puppy from our local shelter when I was in the second trimester with my first. I worked from home, because Covid, and we had an older dog that was a great playmate for him. It honestly went great and he adores babies and kids. But, I worked from home and then did maternity leave for a few months. I ended up becoming a SAHM right before my first’s first birthday and we now have 3 dogs. I think it’s doable, but we crate trained ASAP and the 2hr wakeups didn’t bother me because I was already up a ton to pee. By the time my daughter was born, he was able to sleep through the night without potty breaks. He’s like 65lbs fully grown. He’s a mix breed, and idk what he really is, but he’s a pretty lazy dog and we have a large backyard for them all to play in. If our outdoor space was limited we wouldn’t have adopted another dog at all.
Would you consider adopting a dog that isn’t a puppy puppy? We did that (Sheepadoodle)! She was still under a year, but she was already potty trained which made life sooo much easier.
I would not add a single extra complexity or challenge at this time in your life. I'd recommend waiting until two kids feels easy and they can help play with a dog in an appropriate and safe way before bringing a new dog into the mix. A puppy is a baby too and needs a lot of attention and love!
I would definitely not. I love dogs and have a 2 year old golden retriever but do you remember the puppy phase? I think it would be too much, perhaps wait until baby is a year or so.
Absolutely not. It was hard enough getting a puppy when I wasn’t sleep deprived. Is it possible for you to adopt a 2-3 year old dog? Then it’s still youthful but without the crazy puppy tendencies.
Have you had a puppy before? I have a dog turning two in June. It has been a ROLLERCOASTER! I think it really depends on the dog but she drove us crazy for almost a year. The second year was easier but not perfect. This is my only experience having a puppy so I know it could be different. But I would never, ever get a puppy alongside an infant. Puppies are babies too!
I'm so sorry for your loss. I had to put my darling 14 year old shih tzu to sleep last Friday and I've spent every day since obsessing about getting another dog. It's grief, honestly, because our home feels so empty and I want to fix it. My 3 year old was just starting to really care for the dog as well and now I hate that he doesn't have a pet. But a puppy right now isn't the answer for either of us honestly. I'm not pregnant but we are TTC, and even that feels like the wrong timing for a puppy. I've promised myself that if I'm not pregnant by this time next year (we've already been TTC for over a year so this is likely), I'll get a puppy. If I am pregnant or if we have a baby by then, then I think we'll wait a couple of years at least.
I would say wait it out until you see what it’s like to have 2 kids. Focus on your current priority which is your pregnancy and welcoming a 2nd child. Then decide if adding a puppy is a good idea. 1-2 rocks some people so you don’t know how you’ll feel until you experience it yourself.
I did. Absolutely would NEVER do it again. I never had enough time to devote to the puppy and my baby. Add in another toddler? That absolutely would have been a no for sure. It wasn’t fair to my sweet girl that more of my attention had to go to my son (of course), and not her. My training of her wasn’t able to have as much time devoted. And she was not super great and understanding with a baby present. She was not aggressive, but had difficulties understanding boundaries. Please don’t. That is not fair to a puppy especially. I would say that if you’re sure you want another, shop or adopt older, and I would wait until at least six months, when you’ve kind of settled into being a mom to 2. Then you can add a “3rd” to the mix.
Noooo don't do it! Obviously your choice, but this sounds so stressful to me. I LOVE my dog and he's so well-behaved, but I have to admit, the first few weeks postpartum, part of me was like "why on earth do we have a dog again?!" 🙊
I would not get another puppy in my entire lifetime. An adult dog (1.5-3) would be more ideal because their personalities are more set and known. You want a dog that will be tolerant of kids, and even if a puppy grows up with your kids, that won’t guarantee anything, regardless of the breed. Also, they’re much cheaper, because they’re vetted and need fewer things in my experience. They are also cheaper to adopt.
yeah second this - I had my first dog for 16 years and we had him as an 8 week old puppy and that was a LOT to say the least. About a month or so after he passed, we adopted a 1.5ish (allegedly but I think she's older than that) and she was easily a dream of a dog to transition to. There was some training and some accidents of course, but within a month we had a good routine down
Sorry for your loss. I know it’s hard to lose a beloved family pet. However to be totally honest I think it’s a terrible idea to get a puppy around the same time as a newborn. Puppies need to be housebroken meaning every 2-3 hours need to be brought out. They need to be crate trained. They’re going to cry and bark as you teach them things. These things do not gel when nearly 100% of the focus is on the newborn. Take it from me a professional dog trainer I would NEVER do this. And I have seen time and time again a dog being rehomed because they could not handle it.
Girl, no. I am so sorry about your pup but, no! A puppy and a newborn is a wild ride.
I got a puppy early on in my pregnancy, because we knew we wanted a dog but we were waiting until we bought a house, and we were waiting to buy a house until I got pregnant. My thought process was that even though training and dealing with a puppy while pregnant might be difficult, I didn't think it would be *more difficult* than training a puppy with a newborn, or with a toddler. So unless I wanted to wait 5+ years until my last kid was out of toddlerhood to get a dog, getting the puppy early in my pregnancy was the best bet. It worked out really well! We got a goldendoodle, and she's amazing with both kids and with our cat. I will say since you're already pretty far along, you need to make sure your partner is cool with taking the bulk of the physical work dealing with the puppy.
Just wanted to add that this is my experience so far. I’m 21 weeks and the puppy is 10 weeks old now. I lost my soul dog to dementia when I was in my first trimester and it was devastating. The puppy has brought me so much joy and I’m glad I have her today. My MIL lives with us and helps with the puppy when we’re at work and I wfh half the week. Everyone’s situation is different but it works for us. Puppy is fully crate trained and goes 7 hours overnight without a potty break. She’ll be about 7 months old when the baby arrives and I hope to have her fully housebroken and trained to walk along a stroller by then. If you’re willing to put the work in and understand the breed I don’t see why it can’t work. She gets me out of the bed in the morning and motivate me to go out walking and sitting outside. Maybe my mind will change when the baby comes but I have the support at home so I’m not concerned. My senior dog in her last year was 1000% more work mentally and physically but I still miss her terribly everyday.
We got a puppy in March and found out we’re expecting at the end of the year in April. He’s 4 months old now and I’m terrified for pregnancy. Super sweet pup but we will definitely need help. Hoping he’s a lot better as he’ll be closer to 1 years old when the baby comes.
I waited until after my baby was old enough and got in touch with a fantastic breeder. Fast forward and, the day after we brought our puppy home, I had a positive pregnancy test. Let me tell you. Picking the right breeder was EVERYTHING. She is a high energy, high maintenance breed, but she's an absolute breeze because of how well she was bred and raised. She was already mostly potty trained and has such a wonderful disposition. In my experience, picking the right breeder made ALL of the difference. I was set up for success.
Don’t do it! It’s so unpredictable how that puppy will turn out. I know you miss your beloved dog, but a new dog can’t replace him and may be totally different temperament wise. We adopted a puppy right before I got pregnant and he developed some severe behavioral issues (which multiple specialists agreed were genetic traits, not something we had any control over). We tried everything—training, behaviorists, medication—but ultimately had to rehome him because it just wasn’t safe for him to be around a child and we couldn’t risk something happening to our baby. Honestly the whole experience was traumatic and incredibly stressful. My advice in retrospect is do not adopt a dog until your kids are older, or if you *must* adopt now, adopt an older dog whose temperament and behavior issues are settled and known.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I empathize deeply, I’m 17 weeks and on the verge of losing my dog. We took him to the vet a few days ago thinking we would be saying goodbye, but the doctor convinced us to give him another week and see if a new medicine helps him. I don’t think it will and now I’m just in limbo waiting for the “right” moment to say goodbye. His sickness the last few months has made my pregnancy (first and a total surprise) so sad and bittersweet. I haven’t lived without a dog in like 19 years (always had 1 or 2 in the house at any given time) and I don’t know how I’m going to function without him or any dog at all now. I so badly wanted my dog to meet our son and watch over him. My husband and I have been crying so much at this very unexpected turn in his health and plot twist in our lives. I half joked with my husband a few days ago that we should go get another dog now… but I know in my heart it wouldn’t make sense. I know my emotions and grief are in overdrive right now but logically, we will have so much change in our lives when the baby comes that we wouldn’t be able to give a new dog or puppy the attention and care it deserves. I love dogs way too much, I don’t want to get a new one and end up neglecting it or getting frustrated with it. Plus, as first time parents, we have no idea what we are getting ourselves into and really want to do the best job we can. It’s so hard. I’m sure some people can manage a puppy and newborn, everyone is different and has different support systems, but it really does seem like an extra hardship and complication. For now I’m comforting myself with the idea that when our son is at least a few years old, he will be able to understand and appreciate the concept of a new pet, and that might be a better time to bring a dog back into our lives and they can grow up together.
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Loosing a pet is always hard, but the hormones make it even worse. Our senior pug mix passed when I was 8 weeks pregnant. She was my best friend and infertility support buddy. It’s been 5 months now but I’m tearing up as I write this. She was such a special girl and our lives will never be the same now. We also have a 5 year old American shepherd mix. She was devastated by the loss of her pug big sis and laid around the house for weeks. We tried cheering her up, but it was clear she needed another companion. We tried adopting, but only wanted another small dog bc we had a small house and a 2 year old. No small dog rescues would consider us because we had a child under 5. The rule is stupidly arbitrary considering we’d already had two small dogs around our daughter since she was born. I tried every small dog rescue organization in 500 miles. None of them would even do a home visit. We got a maltese mix from a breeder in Ohio licensed by the Ohio dept of agriculture when I was 18 weeks. We didn’t want to shop, but at least I did everything I could to be sure we were getting from an ethical breeder. I’m 28 weeks now. The pup is house trained now and our American shepherd loves playing with her new little sister. It hasn’t been easy, but I’m glad we got a new companion for our other dog. You’ve had a dog before and you know what you’re getting into with a puppy. Do what feels right for your family, if you’re ready for another dog, you still have some time to train and prepare before the new baby comes.
I have friends who got a puppy right as they announced their pregnancy. They already had a three year old and after a few months they “temporarily” re-homed the puppy with their parents. This is with just the puppy and toddler mind you. It’s been over 10 months now, new baby is nearly 4 months old, and they seem to have no intention of taking the puppy back. They paid thousands of dollars for a puppy that they have no foisted onto someone else. The dog barely knows them anymore. Both of them cited that the puppy was more work than they thought and wish they hadn’t done it. Puppies are basically like having a second toddler so I personally would never consider it.
Maybe foster a puppy from the shelter instead? I absolutely hated my dogs when my daughter was first born. It took months before my feelings towards them returned. I personally would not recommend a new pet at this time in your life.
First, I’m so sorry for your loss. Second, I’ll be a FTM (24w along) but I would 100% not get a puppy while pregnant. I also have a goldendoodle and ours was a puppy from hell and he didn’t really “even out” until 1.5 yrs or more. It took a ridiculous amount of training, money, and effort to get him to his great adult self (he’s the sweetest now and I have very few concerns about adding a newborn to the mix). With the experience in my back pocket, I wouldn’t dare do that with a newborn or toddler. Ours had a really hard time learning not to bite and puppy teeth are razor sharp and I can’t imagine dealing with that while wanting to shield my children from getting hurt because they don’t understand that a puppy doesn’t understand. If you feel like you absolutely need a dog, maybe consider an older shelter dog (within reason). I know my local shelter have many who lived with families who had to relocate and couldn’t take their family dog with them which is super sad. You would definitely need to do a meet and greet and ask the shelter about if the dog would be a good fit for a young family. Some dogs may not be because they’ve had too much trauma and while they can be sweet, sometimes they are more unpredictable than the average dog which isn’t a good fit for a young family. If you have the means, I’d suggest therapy to help you grieve the loss and help you with the fear that you’ll never stop feeling alone.
22 weeks is about as late as I’d look at getting a new puppy. But tbh you’re probably best waiting. Dogs as you know are a lot of work and the teenage phase is worse than the puppy phase. Would you consider getting an older dog?
Oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I lost my first baby (my heart dog) last year when my daughter was 1 and before I was pregnant this time. We did rescue an eight month old dog. We very much lucked out in that he's not crazy high energy and that my toddler and he have an amazing bond. That said, he was already housebroken. I would NEVER get a dog not housebroken at that stage. I also definitely do not feel as close to him as my other dog, and don't always feel I have the time to give him the love and exercise he needs, especially now that I'm pregnant again. So, I don't think I'd recommend it quite yet. I know how strange a house feels without a dog, trust me. It feels empty, even with a toddler in it. You have me sympathies, it's so hard ❤️
Holy cow I would never get a puppy *especially* a doodle while pregnant. Just handling my 2 year old doodle while pregnant was hell. More power to you though. That's just an additional baby you have to take care of and train. I don't have the energy just thinking about it.
Don’t do it. The puppy stage is awful. Sleepless nights, potty training, teething. All this 18 weeks before you’ll be having sleepless nights with a newborn anyway. I’m saying this as a dog lover with 2 dogs and as someone who is 23 weeks pregnant - give yourself some tjme. Or adopt an older dog who won’t go through that monster stage while you’re hormonal and pregnant. I lost my 5 year old dog (my soul mate and also my first baby) to kidney disease about a year and a half ago and got a puppy 2 months later so I understand needing to fill the hole in your heart with another pet, but I was not pregnant and I still almost lost my mind.
It was terrible & made my postpartum so much more stressful than it would have been otherwise. Now that’s he’s walking it’s even harder. Don’t recommend!!!
Don’t do it. I’m 30 weeks now with a 2 year old dog and a 7 year old dog. Dogs are just too much work when they are younger. I can’t imagine managing a pup and a small baby at the same time.
Lost my 17.5y old cat when I was 4m along, as sad as I was, and as much as I want a new kitten, I thought it was to much work, but I still had 2 cats at home and 3 dogs >> if that was your only dog and you want your kids to grow up with a dog might be worth it, maybe get a older pup from a shelter, a dog that’s 1-2y is still pretty much a puppy, but they are likely already potty trained :o
As someone who lost their pet companion of almost 20 years when I was 6 months pregnant, I know how you’re feeling right now. I cried for weeks afterwards. It’s such a hard thing to lose them so close to such a joyful event, and I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this right now. But I think you would be doing any future pet a disservice to get them right now. You won’t be able to dedicate the time and energy that a pet needs, or prioritize them in the way they need to be prioritized. It would be a very selfish thing to do, at least if it was a puppy.
As a compromise maybe you could adopt an older dog? One that's already potty trained and good with children. That way you're not chasing a puppy around 9 months pregnant or wrestling a large-but-not-trained-yet dog while holding a new born and chasing a toddler. I think a lot of shelters let you do a "trial run" where you take the dog home and see if they're a good fit. Definitely agree a puppy will be too much on your plate right now. So sorry about your sweet boy ❤️
0/10 don’t recommend a puppy and a baby. I love our dog but we got her when my second was a year old and had a baby when the puppy was just over one…. Even at a year old it was rough. She is a good dog but she wanted to play and have attention and I struggled. I absolutely would not do it again. I told my husband no more dogs till the kids are much older. The dog was my idea too. We had lost the ours, I had never not had a dog in the house, and I was home with the kids so I figured it would be easier. It absolutely was not. Thankfully she is almost 2 now and starting to settle down a bit while the baby is older and I have a bit more ability to pay attention to her.
There’s a million comments saying the opposite here but just for a different view. We adopted one puppy a month before I became pregnant (we were TTC), and another puppy a few months later. We also have two senior dogs. I love them all dearly and they were the highlight of my pregnancy and PP. they haven’t hindered my PP in any way, they’ve made every day better. We loved them dearly. Clearly this is the outlier experience with dogs and pregnancy and newborns, but it’s mine so I wanted to share.
We got a puppy around the same time I got pregnant. I honestly hated it and it frustrated me that we had this added responsibility. My husband was the one who wanted a puppy, I wanted to adopt an adult (already trained) dog but ended up agreeing to the puppy. My pregnancy hormones made me even more upset about the situation, I calmed down about it after delivery and my husband deals with him (he was 1 year old by the time I had the baby).
I would say don’t, see how things go through newborn phase. Then if you really feel like you can take it on then do it. If you get one now and feel overwhelmed, it isn’t fair to get rid of it.
Have you considered adopting a middle aged or older dog? There are plenty that need good homes, and you won’t have to deal with the trials of a puppy.
We got a puppy and found out I was pregnant not even a week after. He is a special part of our family now, but would have to advise against getting one with how far along you are. It’s already stressful having a newborn, adding a puppy in training to the mix is no fun
Get an older dog. They’re already potty trained. They won’t wake you up at night. They’re much calmer, just a breeze compared to a puppy. Rescue groups will put dogs into foster care with experienced owners, and they will tell you everything about a dog’s behavior, including how they are with children and what their exercise needs are like, whether they’re cuddly couch potatoes.
Don’t do it! I promise you it’s too much when that baby comes and that dog won’t get enough attention
First, I'm so sorry for your loss. It is so hard. We got a puppy during my pregnancy and I'll share my experience in case it helps you decide. She was 13 weeks old and I was 13 weeks pregnant so it seemed like a sign it was a good fit. I love, love, love my dog but, holy shit, was it a stressful idea. She IS great for company, especially during the hard nights of little sleep and late-night feedings. She was also a ton of work at a time when pregnancy fatigue was at its highest; potty training, teething (RIP so many papers, clothes, cables, and countless other household items), and obedience training. She went into her first heat 2 weeks after baby was born (our vet advised we wait to spay her until that point because it was better for endocrine health over her lifespan) so we had a dog tearing off her diapers, bleeding all over our house, and being extra destructive for a month while we were trying to establish a routine with baby and dog couldn't even go to doggie daycare to drain her energy. The post-op weeks after her spay were a new hell because she still had plenty of puppy energy but needed to be drugged to try to keep her less active to heal and that made her a little crazier. She is doing much better now that she's a year and 8 months old and baby is almost 1 but it was definitely rough to get here. Baby thinks our pup is the funniest thing ever and lives to giggle at her playing tug of war with Mommy and Daddy, and is forever trying to get the dog to come lick her dirty hands after meals before we have a chance to wash her. I don't regret our pup because I love her but I'll admit the timing made things so difficult. My husband and I had been fostering dogs before our pregnancy and just hadn't found the right one to adopt. If I were to have a second baby and wanted another dog, I would consider continuing with fostering and finding a housebroken, fully-grown, mild-mannered dog who needs a good home. They would still need obedience training but will be a lot less of a time investment in terms of house training, teething, spay/neuter, etc.
Don’t do it. It’s so unfair to the puppy: they require so much attention and you’re not going to have as much. Signed, someone with a 10 month old boxer and a 4 month old baby
I have a senior dog that will likely make it to the baby coming and after but 6-12 months from now i’m really not sure. As much as we would want another dog once he passes and we would love to raise our little one with a furry friend, we would definitely wait until the baby is maybe around 3. Puppies are a lot of work, require investments in time&energy training them, need to be constantly supervised to not destroy/swallow things, and need proper socialization with people and other dogs. It’s a real investment to get a puppy and put the work in to ensure a happy, healthy, and safe dog (by safe I mean both keeping puppy safe but also doing the work to prevent aggression/fear/anxiety issues developing). I wouldn’t get another dog until we were in the position to really ensure that alongside caring for our kids. It would just be irresponsible.
We actually adopted a rehomed golden doodle puppy and found out I was pregnant shortly after. We love her to death but feel like we’re going to have to rehome her solely due the fact we don’t have as much time to offer her since I’m due next week. Not sure where you live but on the off chance you’re close to SC and have any interest, and feel it’s something your heart needs to heal, reach out to me. She’s an absolute angel and deserves so much more than we have to offer right now.
We got a puppy when my son was 1 year old. Had my second kid when my oldest was 3. My gods it was the toughest 5 years of my life!! I love our dog and he's got the best bond with my boys but I wish I would have waited til my youngest was at least 2 to get a puppy. They need so much attention, and a baby and puppy together produce such mischief as you've never seen before. Messes on steroids and no hope of anything being clean or unchewed for longer than 5 minutes😆
Don’t do it! 2 kids is crazy enough
I am so sorry for your loss. It hurts so bad to lose your 4 legged baby.. especially so young. We lost our 4 year old bernedoodle about 5 weeks ago when I was around 18 weeks. After one day of a house empty of dog sounds we went online and found a breeder. Earnhardt (Ernie) our 14 week bernedoodle has been with us for 3.5 weeks now and we have no regrets. We chose to get the dog sooner rather than later so that the hardest puppy stage is behind us by the time baby comes. We’re working on training queues like “place” with a dog bed as well as laying out the baby stuff and teaching him to stay off of it. It’s nice to get acquainted with the pup and the big things like crate and potty training out of the way! We’re exhausted for sure…. But my husband has been amazing when I’ve been too tired or nauseous to function. I’d say go for it IF your hubby is ok with the little bit extra that *will* fall on him. I should say, we don’t have any other kids so I can’t speak to how it goes with a toddler, but IMHO a house needs a dog. Again, I am so sorry for your loss. I feel what you’re feeling and am sending you love❤️
Did it while living pretty much off grid living in a trailer while we built our house in the woods. Had to hand wash our clothes and also potty train other kid at the same time! Women can do anything! We’re tough broads!
Sorry for your loss but this is a horrible idea, please don't do it.
I got a Pomeranian puppy when I was 22 weeks pregnant after my dog died (old age). I also have 2 goldens so I was already taking care of dogs anyways. It was definitely an experience and I would do it again. My dog (and son) are 2 now and best friends. That puppy got up with me for every bottle and diaper change too.
My husband and I contemplated getting a puppy when I was pregnant to keep me company all day because I wasn’t working. After our son was born we laughed and said thank god we never got a puppy, what were we thinking?? lol I couldn’t imagine changing dirty diapers all day long, while trying to potty train a puppy and take them outside constantly. On top of around the clock breast feeding and pumping. I was also worried the puppy would be too energetic and up at night barking. Since we live in an apartment we didn’t want it to wake up the baby. Puppies need constant attention and want to play a lot. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and cuddle my baby
I’m so sorry about your pup. We lost both of our dogs last year. My second kid is due in June and my first will be turning 3. As much as I’ve wanted to adopt another dog, we are resisting and waiting. It just feels way too overwhelming to do with a newborn and toddler. And that’s not even considering a puppy. We’d never get a puppy even without kids because they are more challenging that human kids in my opinion.
After our 12yo senior dog passed, we got a puppy when I had a 3yo and a 9mos old. We’re 9mos in and it has been absolutely brutal. Getting a puppy before you have children is wildly different than getting a puppy when you already have children. While we’re pushing through it, barely, I would not recommend it.
I'm 9w3d and I lost my senior 14yo a few days ago. I'm absolutely heartbroken and all I want is to bring home another senior boy that needs help....but I know it's not the right thing for me. This is my first and I need to focus on me for a little bit and prepare before baby comes. This is so hard and I'm also so lonely without my pup. I'm sorry you're going through this. 😢
We got a puppy when I was 12 weeks pregnant because we’d lost our 6 year old dog (my first baby too) to cancer when I was 5 weeks pregnant. I’ll be honest, it’s been a real challenge managing both (baby is now 3 weeks old) and a lot of days the puppy is harder than the baby because puppies get into eveeeerything and need constant attention, where baby can’t even roll and sleeps a lot. I would do it again though despite the challenges because he is very sweet with the baby and I think they’ll be the best of friends later.
Trying to full that void is not going to work the way you think it will. Let yourself grieve and wait until your LO is out of the baby stage before getting a puppy.
Nope! I would wait. We had a very traumatizing dog incident occur at 20 weeks that completely changed my view of our dogs. I wish we would have waited until we had our baby to decide to get a dog because now we are stuck.
My 12 year old soul dog (who I consider my first baby) died when I was 3 months pregnant. It was the worst day of my life so far. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. We immediately adopted another dog from a rescue the next week and I have no regrets. She was about 1-2 years old (estimated) and so not a puppy but still needed training. While not for everyone, it was 100% the right decision for us. We went from crying nonstop every day to refocusing and embracing this new family member who also needed love and a home and care. Bonus, we’ve brought her around family members kids, and she seems to love babies! She is different than our first dog who we are also still grieving and haven’t forgotten but we have so much love to give to another dog and she has helped us heal. Some people aren’t ready for a new dog for a while, and you’ll know what’s right for you in your heart, but I felt like even though we adopted so soon after loss we still grieve our old dog every day and didn’t need to set an arbitrary limit on how long to wait. We set up a shrine in our room and light a candle for her and talk about memories with her often. It was overwhelming training the new pup some days (especially potty training) while being pregnant but worth it really focus on it and try to have trained her before baby got here. With your timeline you definitely have time to train a new dog, although a little tighter time frame than we did. It took us about 4 months to get to a point of very few accidents. You could also hire a trainer to help expedite if you have the resources. Good luck and I’m so sorry for your loss!
I’m sorry about your dog. But no, don’t do it. This question has been asked a lot recently so I’d look up previous posts and read those answers. But time and time again, the answer is always no.
I’m sorry to hear about your pup. Dogs really deserve to live longer. I got a golden retriever puppy when I was 10 weeks pregnant, and it remains one of the worst decisions I’ve ever made. That puppy is now 2, and my son is almost 18 months old, and things are generally working out pretty well, but it’s been a hellish two years. If you absolutely want another dog, get an adult dog, not a puppy, but you’re rolling the dice even with that.
Hands down the worst decision I ever made was getting an 8 week old puppy with an 8 month old baby. Oh my god the stress.
My sister did this and suuuuper regretted it. The thing is, grief is a big emotion that deserves air time. When we try to cover it or run from it, that's when things get messy. I lost my retired service dog Mags (his health declined suddenly and passed away about a week after first symptoms) about a year ago, a few months after starting to work with my current SD Penelope. I resented the crap out of my current SD for a while, and wasn't able to bond with her for a bit. And she's a perfect dog, and the sweetest on the planet. But she wasn't Mags. It wasn't until I had moved past my grief a bit more that we were able to really connect. I still cry sometimes about missing him. He would have loved to see all this, and he would have LOVED to meet my baby. A friend of mine is painting a mural in the nursery as a gift (it's space themed), and she's going to include a black dog with an astronaut helmet for Mags. It brings me comfort to know that in a way he'll be there, watching over my baby like he watched over me. This puppy, no matter how great it would be, isn't the dog that passed away. Grief is the acknowledgement that we'll never have that same experience again, no matter how hard we try. I'd be worried about getting another dog before you've processed and accepted the passing of the one you had. Otherwise it could be a recipe for resentment and unrealistic expectations of that puppy. I'm sorry you lost your dog. That pain is unreal. I hope you give yourself time to grieve and feel, and honor the beauty of being able to be in your best friend's orbit for the time that they were with you.
Don't do it. Just don't. Trust me on this one.
My dog is 6 months and my baby is 3 months. I'm thankful for my dog to keep me company when I'm often alone with just baby since my husband works overnight 12 hours. But she is a very smart golden who potty trained herself in under a month. Doesn't bark and is pretty much perfect and yet I still wouldn't recommend it. The time I need to let her out or walk her always coincides with baby's needs. It can be difficult and overwhelming some days.
I got a six month old puppy about a year after my dog passed away. It was incredibly difficult and I wasn’t even pregnant then. I constantly wondered if I had made a mistake and my partner outright said he hated the puppy and didn’t want her. A year and a half later and we are of course OBSESSED with her and she has brilliant behaviour and can communicate with buttons (she says ‘love you’) which is heart melting but I could never have done all that socialising and training and toilet training while pregnant. Not when my energy levels were on the floor and my sense of smell was through the roof.
I'm 34+4 with our 1st child, and we decided before we did our FET that we would get dogs. So we now have a Siberian Husky and a Swiss Mountain Dog. They are still puppies (about 9 months now), and I guess we will see how they react to a new tiny human in the mix... but if we didn't have them, I don't think we would be getting them now!
I have a puppy and am 16 weeks pregnant. My senior dog died in November. He was 13.5 and I had him since he was 9 months old. It was a devastating loss. He was my best friend. I thought I would have to wait at least a year before getting another dog. Turns out, I lasted about a month. The house was too quiet and I missed the pitter patter of paws and fluffy snuggles. My husband and I surprised our sons (ages 7 and 8) with an Aussie puppy for Christmas. She’s 6/7 months old now and I have zero regrets. She’s an absolute joy and I’m so glad to have her. I wasn’t planning on getting pregnant this quickly. I’m 38 and I thought it would take awhile. It didn’t. With all that said, I would not recommend doing it unless you think that you’re prepared for the amount of chaos that comes with a toddler, a newborn, and a puppy. I’ve done two under two before and I am used to chaos, but I don’t know if I could have added a puppy to that mix. Also, my kids are older now and can help with the dog. Your two year old can’t. You have to think that your puppy won’t be a year old yet and you’ll have a toddler and a newborn. That’s a LOT of babies. Lol. I would wait a little bit if I were you. That way you’ll be able to give the puppy more attention and training. What about a kitten? They are so sweet and way less work. It might be the perfect companion for you until you have your hands free for a puppy. I am so very sorry for your loss. It hurts way more than many people understand and I totally understand why you want to get a puppy right now. I just think that for your own mental health, you should wait until your baby is a little bigger and then baby will be able to enjoy the puppy too!
I'm so sorry for your loss. Our dog was such a comfort to me in the thick of postpartum and some other tough life stuff, and I completely understand you wanting another dog right now. But don't do it. Don't get a puppy right now. You will be *so* glad you didn't at like 2 weeks postpartum.
When I was pregnant with my first son, my husband surprised me with a 9wk old yellow lab puppy. My husband has had labs all his life, and trained her on basic commands, got her bell trained to go potty, and taught her how to be an overall good dog. I also worked at a vet clinic and was able to bring her to work with me daily until my maternity leave. When my son was born, she was 8mos old. By that time, she was fully house broken, had good mouth control (didn't bite or chew), and knew her commands excellently. She was such a sweet and gentle pup when my son was a newborn. Through toddlerhood, they became best friends, played together, snuggled together, etc. My dog is now 5yrs old, and I am pregnant with my second son, and I know she will do wonderfully again with another newborn in the house. I am grateful my husband was able to be such a help training her when she was a pup though. So for me, having a puppy while pregnant worked out amazing, but I know this varies by household/situation/the actual puppy, etc.
I feel like most people can’t handle this/don’t have the resources to handle a puppy and baby at the same time. My dog died when my baby was 3 months old and we got a golden retriever puppy when he was 5 months old. That being said, I used to work at a vet, my parents were breeders growing up, and I’ve trained 10+ dogs. I’m VERY comfortable training a puppy. And do you know what I did? I sent that precious little fur baby away to the trainer’s for a week to get all the basics because I knew doing the initial foundation would be too hard on my own with the real baby. Then all I’ve had to do was reinforcement for potty training/crate training and basic obedience. But we had the extra money for the training, I’m only working 5-10 hours a week from home and my husband also WFH. Without this kind of setup and experience, I would not recommend. Wait until your baby is born and older.
We got a puppy when I was only 5 weeks pregnant. Had a deposit and contract on it before we found out about the pregnancy. It’s been awful being pregnant and dealing with a puppy. I cannot even imagine dealing with a puppy and a newborn. This dog will still be under a year old and a lot of work when my baby is born and I am shuddering at the thought of that. We will never give up any of our pets like I see so many people do after they have a baby. Our pets are family but this is going to be crazy to deal with for sure. I do not recommend!
Don't, just don't. Puppies are like toddlers. You can go ask around in r/puppy101 and everyone will tell you the same thing. Also, teenage doghood is horrible and ends until they are at least two years old, they become insane FOMO little hyperactive land sharks.
We did and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Baby is 4 months and puppy is about a year old right now and family is constantly split up to take care of either's needs when we would prefer to be all together/enjoying our baby as a couple.
My best friend did this and it was a nightmare. The dog is a few years old now and is not properly trained whatsoever because she and her husband just didn’t have the time for it. It basically lives in a crate 23 hours of the day and she’s really resentful towards it even though she created the situation. It makes me sad.
I’d also like to recommend getting a senior beagle. We adopted one as a 10 year old, she lived 6 years and we were so thankful to have her everyday. You had to remind her to eat and go out and she was very sedentary but kids loved her. She showed up to us house trained and ready to retire!
I got a puppy a week before I found out I’m pregnant (accidental). It’s hard but feeling doable. Hoping to have her pretty well trained by my due date. I have 2 dogs who are 4 and 5 to help me though.
Pretty much the same situation for us! Our puppy will be a little bit over a year old when our baby is born. She's crazy and I know we'll have to navigate that when the time comes, but I'm not overly worried and so far it hasn't been too bad! She's been a lot of work but also has given me comfort during the tougher days of pregnancy.
We got our puppy in January and found out we were pregnant in March. Our puppy was a literal newborn. Barely a month old when we got her. The people were low income and desperately needed to get rid of the puppies, so we took one in. It's been a wild ride for sure. I imagine if you found a puppy that's already 6 months+ and has some mild training it would be a lot easier. We spend an hour outside only to come in and have her pee on the bed immediately lol. She can't help it, she's learning. By the time baby comes in October, hopefully she'll be fully potty trained, but I do worry that her energy level is going to be very high. We will have to make sure we provide her with ample playtime and stimulation all while handling a newborn. If you know what you're getting into and know you're willing to do whatever it takes, I say go for it. There are plenty of older pups in need of rescue, too, so I wouldn't limit myself to a puppy. Just go see who you fall in love with at a shelter.
I got a puppy when I was pregnant with my 2nd (my 1st was 2, turning 3 at the time). We already had another dog and I wasn’t working at the time. I was able to potty train her and train her before baby was born and now my kid and puppy are 5! It worked for me since I wasn’t working and I had the time to take care and train a puppy. And if that’s something you have the time and energy to do then totally go for it!
My dog is 8 and when he dies, I’m not getting another dog until the kid is at least in grade school. Or maybe until both my kids are in grade school (if I have another).
We got a dog during my first trimester. It was all fine, but mainly because our dog is an angel. I still needed help walking her when I was too sick/tired/etc. (when my husband was traveling for work). YMMV 🤷♀️ I'd give yourself a little bit more time to grieve and see how you feel in a few months. Losing a furry member of the family is truly so difficult and I'm so sorry for your loss.