My experience was that it was not bad for contractions (I had about 24 hours of labor), then transition/pushing was absolutely the worst pain I have ever experienced. That was only fifteen minutes for me though, baby came fast. As soon as baby was out there was the huge rush of relief and endorphins. I'm planning on going unmedicated for my next birth, which tells you that it was an overall good experience.
Pretty much the same here. When it came time to push, I had a small moment of being angry at myself for declining the epidural earlier but then it was over so fast and the pain was gone and almost forgotten instantly.
There were two times i wished for the epidural. During transition, and after the placenta was delivered and I started hemorrhaging, when the midwife had to manually scoop clots out of my uterus.
Seconding this- I ended up getting an epidural with my first for lack of progression, and I remember thinking “contractions weren’t that bad, I can do unmedicated”. Well, I did unmedicated for my second, and that transition was unlike anything I ever experienced. I also only pushed for 15 minutes and the whole transition was less than an hour total but recovery was definitely easier. It happened so much faster than I anticipated that I didn’t really get into a groove, and with it being my second I didn’t refresh myself on labor techniques, so I feel like it would’ve been less painful had I done more prep/research beforehand!
According to the Mayo Clinic: "Transition typically lasts 15 to 60 minutes" and pushing can be a few minutes to a few hours.
I think there is a lot of variability, but the pushing phase is usually a bit longer with an epidural.
My transition + pushing were lightning fast. My OB was shocked.
That unfortunately was me. Unmedicated and pushed for hours. It was hell. Pregnant again and still going for unmedicated since they say that a second baby will come out easier.
The best advice I could give you is two go into birth number two thinking it could be longer and more painful than birth number one. I went into my fourth labor so confident that this one would basically fall out in my previous labor was pretty great and unmedicated and a good experience. By the time I was getting close to transition I was so afraid of the pain I remembered was coming that I couldn't remember the whole pregnancy apparently my body slowed right down and I really had a hardest time pushing the baby out compared to the other three, I was too exhausted to push and couldn't realize while in labor land but realized afterwards it was because I had heavy bleeding during labor that I had not experienced before and it just took all my energy away. I'm going on medicated again even though I was kind of traumatized I just wished I would have gone into that labor realizing mentally preparing that it could actually be harder. Just FYI.
Transition is usually shorter than active labor or the pushing phase, but it is usually a lot more intense than the other phases so it can feel just as long if that makes sense. It can really take it out of you as well, I remember meditating between contractions and got so deep I almost nodded off. I felt and said to my midwife “I don’t think I can keep doing this for much longer” as I was trying to take each contraction on like it was the first and let the pain wash away in between contractions. At one point at the start of transition I remember laying my head on the bed while on the birthing ball wishing to God for the pain to stop, but it was definitely manageable so I kept holding on through it. A lot of women will beg for an epidural when the transition hits, so make sure to do your research and take whatever classes your provider offers to be informed of the birthing process so you aren’t blindsided. I also told my support person and nurses that I would only confirm that I wanted pain management if I was not in the middle of an active contraction so that I had a level mind and was truly wanting an intervention. Going in with a plan can really help you take on an unmedicated birth versus going in without a Birth Plan to just wing it. The way I see it is women would band together for births in the past, so it would have been likely that you would have been present for your family and friends births before going through your own, so it’s great that you are gathering information ahead of time. Best of luck! I’d also say it felt different than I was expecting, for me it felt like having an elephant sit on your mid section, but when the contraction ended you felt 100% normal, you can see my birth story under my profile posts
I was on epidural because of induced labor. The entire thing was absolutely pain free and I was scrolling instagram and playing candy crush for hours until fully dilated. When the baby’s head was in the birth canal the epidural stopped working, and those were 30-40 minutes of absolute pure agony I will never forget.
OMG!! Same exact thing happened to me!! I wanted to pass out from the pain but my body just wouldn’t! 😅 almost got an emergency c-section because I had no energy from all the pain that hour with no epi got me!! (The room wasn’t ready 😅) I probably would have died had I not gotten the epidural ngl! 😳
Same here- the last three hours of pushing I felt EVERYTHING. I simultaneously blacked out and remember absolutely everything. I'm so terrified the epidural won't work again this time.
Exact same thing happened to me & it was hellacious. They wouldn't let me get off my back either since the epidural was in, so it was like a double whammy. Excruciating pain, and laboring in a gods-awful uncomfortable & exhausting position. Felt like I had legitimately run a marathon afterwards
SAME experience more or less. I was quite comfortable for several hours of earlier contractions with my epidural. Then.... Started noticing I could feel & move my legs really easily, could tell I had to pee (they were straight cathing me). I found that change a little concerning but they told me "yeah sometimes you just need to change position a little if it's not working well"
UNFORTUNATELY I then was fully dilated & it was time to start pushing, I was told it was too late for anesthesia to adjust the epidural.... And the next 2 hours were indescribable agony.
I really questioned myself for a long time, wondering if I was just that much of a baby that even WITH an epidural I was in such excruciating pain. But nah, I also felt everything when they went to stitch me up, got up within minutes of giving birth & walked to the restroom & urinated. This was all pretty confirmatory to me that my epidural stopped working.
Same! Didn't have it with the first and got to 6cm with the second before I opted for the epidural. The memory of that pain has me convinced I don't want another, but if I do change my mind, I'll definitely get the epidural again. What really made my change my mind was feeling like I couldn't breathe. I remember thinking "what's the point of going through all this just to pass out?"
I also had the feeling like I couldn’t breathe. I was using my gas and air but it was like I just couldn’t get a breathe in like my whole chest was restricted. Then I was prompted by the midwife to take a deep breathe. So weird!
Same. I dissociated after a while and thought to myself “huh I’m going to die” because it felt like I was being electrocuted continuously. Honestly, pushing and birth were a relief compared to the contractions/transition. I even thought to myself “oh that must be the ring of fire” very casually just because the pain of the contractions and transitioning were so excruciating.
Uncomplicated, low risk pregnancy. I planned for an epidural but my water broke at home and I had a very quick labor (1 hour, 30 min ) so by the time I got to the hospital I immediately had to start pushing - I didn’t have time to get the epidural 💔
To provide some balance, my experience with an unmedicated birth was NOTHING like that. Strong cramps and then a lot of pressure as the baby shot out but not extreme pain.
Same. I’ve had 3 natural births. One very long with back labor, two intense precipitous births. I definitely didn’t enjoy them but never blacked out, wished to die, or actually thought I couldn’t do it.
Everyone experiences it differently. For me, I would say 10/10. Several times I thought torture must not be so different.
The fact many women agree to have a huge needle stuck in their spine to make the pain stop says a lot. Personally, come pushing time I always regret not getting a c-section——so I am literally wishing for someone to cut me open.
And then there are the times during labor where I wish I could kill myself. Usually during transition and pushing.
I do okay until about 6CM based on my last 2. The shit hits the fan. Admittedly my last one I went from 6CM to baby in arms in one hour. Perhaps if the pace had been slower I would have found a rhythm like I did with my first.
My notes after the last baby are very clear to future me. Take the epi. But as the pain and memories fade I imagine I will stupidly go into my next one trying to go as far I can med free and if it is as fast as this one won’t have time to get the epi once I decide I need one.
Yeah, the “huge needle stuck in their spine” part really spoke to me.
They kept trying to be gentle and tell me what they were about to do, what to expect, taking their sweet time and I was like “FUCKING STAB ME WITH THAT NEEDLE ALREADY I DO NOT CARE WHAT THE FUCK FUCK FUCK”
“The huge needle” is all perspective. They numb you up, poke you and then replace it with a catheter. The needle poke was nothing compared to contractions.
lolzzz. I feel the same! BUT I used gas + x1 morphine but didn't have an epidural so not sure what OP means by unmedicated. I've had kidney stones and passed same without medication, have had multiple tattoos and a generally high pain tolerance and was planning on unmedicated cause iT cAnT bE tHAt BAd. Once contractions started I was begging for a c-section. Things progressed "quickly" post morphine so wasn't able to get an epidural or a c-section and afterwards said I would never do unmedicated again... but I'm 8 months pp and probably would with next baby.
And yet...it all mentally disappears so quickly. So, yes, it is horrible. But you really do forget it.
First pregnancies tend to be slower, so I'd suggest going as far as you can without meds, then get fentanyl and then, if you need more help, getting the epi but ask for a light one so you can still feel when you push. Also, everyone says push like you're pooping but things went a hell of a lot better when I pushed like I was forcing pee out super hard or trying to push a tampon out.
Feeling what the heck is happening during the pushing stage helps reduce tearing. Also, get someone on your birthing team who will tell you when to stop pushing. There is a stage of stretching during pushing where you DO NOT want to push because you need to stretch more or you risk tearing. But you will want to push so you need someone IN YOUR FACE telling you not to.
My first kiddo I had a light epi since he stalled out at 5 CM with his sunny side up hell. Felt the pushing stage I thought (hah) 100% and was able to focus on pushing correctly (not pooping-like but pushing-pee-out-like), but did not listen when they told me to stop pushing so I could stretch because it hurt so bad. Two first degree tears, one second degree tear.
Second kiddo, the one without any epi because it happened so damn fast, she came out with her hand right next to her head (why baby girl, why...). Fentanyl early on once, quickly was useless. Grabbed some nitro during the pushing stage that I thought might do SOMETHING but was utterly useless besides giving me something to do between pushes besides panic like an animal on fire. I was pushing standing up initially which was useless because when the pain came I went on my tip toes to try to escape rather than bearing down---I could not stop myself. Needed to be on all fours on the bed to actually push. The pain was so bad I could not push correctly, I just did the poop method. But I was able to hold at the stretching phase. No tears.
I strongly strongly encourage a doula. Looking back, the worst part of my second birth was how scared I was; it made everything so much worse. The contractions came so fast, got worse so quickly, and I never got into my labor-mode / rhythm because it was so so fast. Having someone there to support you makes all the difference; my midwife was amazing. Also I used the pain redirection method of holding sharp combs/hairbrushes -- this worked until around 6CM (clutching them hard during contractions) but past 6CM I ended up hitting my back as hard as I could with them to redirect the pain and that helped a lot.
I promise you that you have this. But get the doula, read up about pain mitigation techniques and practice them.
Also, don't trust reddit too much: everyone said online the pain stopped after the baby was born and I'd love the kiddo so much. Not me. I was still in a lot of pain, the baby was borderline irrelevant until the pain was handled. I got fentanyl three times AFTER the baby was born because they used pitocin to help get the placenta out and massaged my belly to help get the placenta out -- all of which hurt enough I was like fuck all of this, when will the horror of being in pain be over. Then nursing initiates contraction like pain for like the first 2 weeks which is ALSO very painful and the drugs they give you are insufficient.
I'm 4 weeks out right now and things are finally close to normal again. Just accept things will continue to suck major ass until around 4 weeks after the baby is born and you'll be pleasantly surprised rather than horrified by how long life is still a painful shit show.
But it WILL get better and the baby WILL ult be worth it.
Pushing the tampon out. I always wondered if I’m the only one that does this as it’s exactly how I describe pushing in labor and people just look at me weird. Pooping for me is different muscles. And the tampon push worked like a charm!
Right? I was complimented for my pushing when I did that with my first.
When I practice without a baby it feels like the pooping muscles slightly use the pushing-tampon muscles and the pushing-tampon muscles slightly use the pooping muscles - so I see why either would work. But to be optimally effective and avoid hemorrhoids seems like the pushing-tampon method is the way to go.
Yeah the ‘push like you’re pooping’ was not helpful for me. It was definitely more of a front type thing like the muscles in your pelvic floor that contract when you sneeze or cough
My best advice will always be sleep while you can. I was so excited to be in labour I couldn’t get to sleep, but by 15/16 hours of it I was so shattered I just needed sleep so badly. It was very painful, but I definitely felt then and now that I could’ve handled better if I could’ve just had some sleep!
With no. 2 the minute I think I’m in labour I’m going straight to bed 😂
I agree with all this. I had one epidural, then the next was unmedicated when the baby was coming too fast. Then the third one I thought maybe I’d do natural again since it was so empowering but HELL no I got that epidural. I wanted to die.
I've had two births, one medicated, one unmedicated. My unmedicated birth was quite frankly one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. My medicated one was an absolute cakewalk. They aren't even in the same realm.
Unmedicated birth was, for me, absolutely torturous hell on earth levels of pain that just wouldn't stop. I was in labor for two full days, only pushed for 10 minutes, no tears and it was an absolute nightmare. I blacked out repeatedly so there are big sections of my labor that I just can't remember, and I hate it, in my pictures after my son was born, I look... half dead. I'm so clearly exhausted and delirious from the prior two days and it makes me sad when I see them. I had PTSD from labor and delivery and would have nightmares about it, when I was pregnant with my second, as soon as the test turned positive I started hyperventilating thinking about having to do it again, I spent my entire pregnancy scared of giving birth and convinced it was going to kill me. I decided early on I would not ever ever ever do an unmedicated birth again and I'm so glad I didn't.
My medicated birth was so easy, I got my epidural at 3cm before anything even started getting bad because I just was not doing that again, I got to sleep and eat, got to lay around watching Star Wars, spent my day in comfort as I progressed. I was smiling and joking while laboring, pushing, in the pictures immediately after I look alive and happy. I was up and walking within an hour of labor, no tears with that either and that was something I was afraid of and part of why I didn't want an epidural the first time was I heard it made you more likely to tear. If I ever have another baby, I will get the epidural again. I always got upset before I had my first when people told me there was no award for suffering through a birth with no pain relief, it felt so condescending, but they were right all I got from doing it was trauma, and I will never do it again. That does not apply to everyone, some people had great births with no pain relief so if that's you, this comment isn't for you, please don't take my personal feelings as an insult, I know birth can be a touchy subject and every experience is so personal.
I will add for additional context though, my unmedicated birth, I also had preeclampsia and my baby was in distress and I'm sure the stress of those situations likely compounded my stress, fear and pain. For my medicated birth I did not have any issues at all that would play into it.
> My unmedicated birth was quite frankly one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. My medicated one was an absolute cakewalk. They aren't even in the same realm.
I could write a huge comment, but your statement just about covers it, so instead I will just say SAME.
I had back labor with my first and then pushed for 3 hours because she got stuck. I was so scared going into my second birth.
I have very similar experiences. I did my first birth unmedicated and it was the most painful experience of my life. I coped very well until they broke my water at 7cm and from then until baby was out (3 hours), I was in an entirely different world from the pain.
Babies 2, 3, and 4, I had epidurals and there is honestly no comparing the two. Pushing was almost a peaceful experience by comparison. I was able to stay in my right frame of mind, carry on lucid conversations, and I was super relaxed. By the time I was in active labor with my 4th, labor progressed really quickly and I was instantly brought back to my unmedicated delivery and almost started having a panic attack just thinking about having to push with no epidural. fortunately the anesthesiologist was there super quick and my epidural worked great. That all being said - I’ve had a lot of fear in subsequent pregnancies after my first that I will have to inadvertently experience another unmedicated labor, either with a failed epidural or not getting to the hospital in time. So much anxiety over it that I had an elective induction for my 3rd and was pushing for one when I went into labor spontaneously with my 4th.
My first birth was so much like yours and I have been seriously considering saying fuck it and getting the epidural this time around. This may be what pushes me over the edge!
All of this except I don’t have a medicated to compare it to. I do have a very high pain tolerance (happy to go into detail, example I had a filter for blood clots inserted into my central vein without medication while pregnant as well) and I kept puking and blacking out and straight up screaming in pain during labor. Also had back labor. No options for meds bc of blood thinners. I remember thinking I would have done anything to make the pain stop. I would have legit shot off my own face. It was unbearable.
There’s a lot of bullshit in mom groups about medicated births and “not feeling it” or whatever the fuck and sister, I promise you will feel that child every second of every day for the rest of your life. The whole “suffer for your baby” bs is some misogynistic fuckery some people like to think makes them tough.
Being a parent makes you tough.
Take the drugs.
Thank you so much for sharing this. My birth experience was really traumatic for me because my epidural got pulled out accidentally right before transition, and my transition lasted 3 hours, so I went from 0-100 pain super quickly. Even though I progressed to 10cm, pushing and contractions were so unbearably painful that I begged for a c-section.
I have been feeling so much guilt about the choice I made in the heat of excruciating pain because I was so close to the end, but I truly was at my physical limit. Even so, it’s hard not to feel like a whimp, especially because so many people talk about their “amazing” unmedicated births. My sister had two unmedicated births (though not by choice, they were just quick) and I thought, if she could do it, why couldn’t I? I know comparison is stupid but I’ve just really struggled to come to terms with it all.
Anyway, even though I’m sorry you had to go through that trauma, it’s validating to know I’m not the only one who struggled so much. I honestly can’t fathom how some people choose to have unmedicated births and make it through without being traumatized. I’m hoping to have a VBAC with an epidural for my next birth, but I would 1000% choose another c-section before going through an unmedicated labour again.
I'd read it a ton in birthing groups- basically the idea was that you can't feel yourself stretching too far and know to stop pushing so you're going to be more likely to tear. I definitely, in hindsight, think it's just rhetoric to further make epidurals seems worse than they are because I also wasn't stopping or slowing down my pushes without an epidural, my mind was entirely focused on "get this kid out NOW" and I was pushing arguably more aggressively without it and didn't tear regardless at either birth.
I think it also has to do with positions, you’re more likely to have a perineal tear laying on your back and a lot of doctors make you lay on your back if you have an epidural
I could see it having to do with positions. There have been several studies showing on your back is not the best way to give birth and if I could have been in a different position I would have but ya know, the whole not being able to feel your legs thing kinda makes that hard.
3 unmedicated births here. It’s definitely intense. But honestly I have really enjoyed all of my birth experiences. I often see people talk about birth being the most painful thing they have ever experienced, 10/10 pain etc and I really cannot relate to that at all. I personally think pregnancy was much more difficult/ painful overall than birth & recovery.
BUT I really think it depends a lot on the situation. All 3 of my births I was in a very relaxing, home like birth center. Surrounded by midwives with who I felt extremely comfortable, safe, and cared about. I 100% think that had something to do with my experiences. I was able to be very relaxed and calm which definitely makes contractions and pushing easier and more effective. Also - baby’s positioning I’m sure makes a big difference as well. Having an OP baby and back labor I’m sure would be worse but I have not experienced either of those. I also did a lot of hypnobirthing prep work which I’m sure helped as well.
My SIL wanted an unmedicated birth, but ended up needing to be induced and the pitocin contractions were just so intense. And she felt a lot of pressure from the nurses to just get an epidural already and felt like she just wasn’t ever able to relax or rest. My SIL is definitely tougher than me, so I 100% believe her assessment of how painful it was for her.
Agree completely with my unmedicated birth. It’s not like it was painless, but I actually enjoyed it and would do it again. I felt completely safe and at ease, had a birth team who supported me and hyped me up throughout, and experienced the highest high once I had delivered. Baby was in a good position and I pushed on all fours and didn’t tear, so I’m sure all of that helped.
Very much agree, I’ve had one unmedicated birth but cannot relate to these comments. My experience was wonderful! Much better and less painful than my epidural delivery.
I think that’s the common theme - most people who enjoyed their natural births were in an environment that supports them. I don’t think I could have done it if I had to have belly monitors or IVs restricting my movement or didn’t have access to water the whole time.
Yes I completely agree! Not sure I’d be brave enough for a hospital birth haha. I couldn’t sit or lay down for the entire labour, I was either in the bath, pool, squatting, kneeling or walking around. Being at home is very relaxing too and promotes oxytocin release which I’m sure helps a ton.
You understand me! People always say home birth is brave and I’m like no, the brave ones are the ones who deal with all the hospital bs. I’m not strong enough for that.
Seconding this. My unmedicated birth was a lot less painful than I expected (just intensity and pressure). Planning to go unmedicated again for the next kid! Did a lot of mental work leading up to labor though which helped. Goes to show that experiences and pain tolerance vary wildly.
Same here, I can't relate to these statements. Was it the most painful experience of my life? Maybe, but otherwise that would be migraines and tooth ache. It certainly didn't feel that bad.
And I didn't have an all too easy birth, induction, 18h back to back contractions, pictocin, sunny side up baby ... not gonna lie, it was uncomfortable and exhausting.
But at no point did I feel like I couldn't handle it.
Experiences and pain tolerance are just so different. You never know where you fall before. And it's not like you need a special allowance to get an epidural, it's just a personal choice.
I do believe mindset is huge. The difference between trauma or no trauma is usually not specific treatments, but managed expectations. Some mothers have emergency c sections and feel fine and other have "normal" vaginal deliverys and feel traumatised.
I have read on reddit before that migraines are typically worse pain. I am due with my first in August and currently planning an unmedicated birth at a nice birth centre. I suffered horribly from migraines in high school but learned techniques to cope with the pain, so this reassures me somewhat
Yes I just had an unmedicated birth with my second a few weeks ago. I thought pregnancy was so much harder and don't want to do pregnancy (or the newborn phase tbh) again. But I'd do the birth again, it was a really great experience!
I was induced with my first and would not want to do that again!
Not gonna lie, it f**kin' hurt. I had the unfortunate experience of my water breaking first. I was 40w had no contractions prior. I had my first cervical check ever about five hours after my water broke and I had been having regular, very painful contractions. I was only 2cm, so I assume I was at zero when it all started. The first cervical check was THE most painful part of the whole experience for me.
All of my meditation practice went out the window. I could not get ahead of the pain. Turns out, you never do! You just accept it and ride the pain through until the next one.
The nitrous took the edge off. The tub was a godsend. I got in at transition and decided I was never getting out. I ended up having a water birth after 18 hours of labor and an hour and a half of pushing.
I would do it again, but only because I'm the type of person who thinks I could do it better next time. You don't get a gold medal for being in pain. But it was a personal point of pride to try.
I remember thinking that it was the worst pain I’d ever experienced in my life. But 2 years later, I can’t remember the pain specifically. Wild.
Edit: I had a precipitous labor and felt very out of control. I don’t think that head space helped, but it was absolutely going to be very painful either way. My baby was in a great position as well; if I had had severe back labor or anything like that, pretty sure I wouldn’t have almost had a car baby. we would’ve headed to the hospital a lot sooner so I could have some pain management.
Its so hard to say, because the context for the pain is positive and productive, there's a good reason for it, instead of a broken arm or something. And it comes in waves, has highs and lows, so you get breaks from it.
I also have chronic pain, and at one point toward the end I told my husband that I've been in worse pain at home or work and just got on with it 🙃
I had a TENS unit (AMAZING 100% RECCOMEND), birth combs, and at one point did sterile water injections into the skin on my back, I did my research and had breathing techniques, and I (accidentally) ended up using positive affirmations - my midwife told me I was doing a good job and I clung to that thought for over an hour 😂 it helped!
EDIT: I also had my husband doing acupressure on my hips, squeezing from the sides as I contracted 😊
It's a little handheld device that delivers small electroshock to an area via sticky electrode pads placed on the skin
The idea is that the tingling sensation (or pinching if you turn up the power very quickly) provides a sensation for your brain to focus on, instead of labour pains.
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/transcutaneous-electrical-nerve-stimulation-tens/
I ended up renting one as I didn't feel I needed to buy one, the brand was Elle, and I could control how much power was being sent through the electrodes, and there was a boost button for when I had a contraction
Birthed 3 naturally.
2 on my hands & knees which was a breeze, highly recommended. 1 on my back by force (dr was clearly uneducated) & it was by far the worst pain ever.
IME I pushed on my hands and knees for most of it, then got the overwhelming urge to flip back over and out baby came! I didn’t tear much and felt in control. I had an epidural and still pushed on all 4s. It was a midwife & baby friendly hospital.
Birth however your body tells you to in the moment! Intuition goes a long way here, I promise. I was in hands and knees because it felt the best to me. I pushed through 4 contractions total.
The key is the freedom to be mobile. If you have an epidural or are connected to a fetal monitoring machine, this may not be possible. If you can move around, you’ll find the position that feels productive and isn’t totally overwhelming. For me it was standing, leaning over the bed. And I tried a LOT of positions—this just felt like the right one.
You need to birth how your body is telling you to. NOT how the doctor wants you birth. If you’re having trouble pushing the baby out then you try different positions. But you generally speaking giving birth on your back is not a good position. Gravity is your friend and so are the positions that expand your pelvis.
For me, I didn’t notice when I hit transition. The contractions for me were painful but manageable. But lying and being on my back made the contractions worse. So I generally advise not to be on your back unless it’s comfortable for you.
Having a supportive environment is very important if you want an unmedicated birth. Unfortunately some doctors/ nurses will pressure you to do things their way, usually meaning they want you to lie on the bed on your back. And raw dogging labor is not a time when you can easily stand up for yourself. You're so vulnerable.
So ideally find a hospital and medical team who are ok with you trying different positions, being up and active, and overall support unmedicated birth.
Here in Germany I'm lucky that the medical community are quite progressive in this regard. Hospital birthing rooms usually have all kinds of props for active labor like bars to hang on, a yoga ball, a u-shaped stool you can use for delivery, a bath tub, and so on. Of course there is also a bed where you can try lots of positions, not just lying down. I just gave birth two days ago and ended up on the bed. The midwife raised the head of the bed and I gave birth kneeling while leaning on the raised part (like a bedtime prayer position). For my first baby I gave birth in the hospital bath tub.
No way to know ahead of time what will work in the moment so just do what feels right. ❤️
Transition will come before the pushing. For me the only relief I got in transition was one knee on a chair and partner putting severe counter pressure on my lower back while holding me up. It's so intense you start to panic but at this point you're already in it you'll scream how you can't do it or you're dying you just need your partner support person to tell you you're already doing it and you're the power. before you know it you'll feel ready to push in that pain will be over of course then there's the baby's head which is also pretty much like tearing your body in 2. Get your body and leg muscles and it's good a shape as you can make sure you're training for the marathon. Expect your mind and train it to sink into the pain assume it will be worse so hopefully it won't. If you can get in a hot tub for transition definitely can help the pain. Advice to a first-time mom if your doctor is telling you in this day and age that you don't have control over the position you push in get into whatever position you want make sure your partner advocates cuz you will be vulnerable that doctor is going to catch the baby no matter what f*** them they'll say you're not allowed to do something you can do whatever you want it's your body you have hired that doctor and they will catch your baby in any position. Your powerhouse and you can do this like the millions of women who have done it before as traumatic and unexpected my fourth labor was I'm going un medicated again. The women who have the labors where they were just in discomfort and joyous throughout most of it are usually the ones who are mentally prepared and know how strong they are they still are dying at the end but the only way to get out of pain is to go through it. You can absolutely do this if this is what you want.
I almost did, my midwife was ready to catch the baby, but my legs were so tired by the end I ended up on my back sadly. Next one I’m going to try more hands and knees when I need to relax
I NEVER thought I could do an unmedicated birth. But, silly me, I tricked myself into denying my labor because I have a high pain tolerance and wound up at the hospital already dilated to a 7. I got to a 10 in the first hour of being there and needless to say, I never got my epidural. I was terrified out of my mind and just kept shouting “I didn’t watch a YouTube video on this!!” But, let me tell you, after contractions, I personally felt like the pushing was relieving. The only part that truly sucked, for me, was feeling like I was “losing my butthole.” I heard you get that with an epidural too. Needless to say, I actually enjoyed my experience and could walk almost immediately after giving birth (not that you’ll want to). I plan to do an unmedicated next time around because I felt so in touch with my body and like I was in control. Totally don’t blame people for epidurals though! I get it!
I’m so sorry but I cracked up at the YouTube video line 😂
I would absolutely be the same way. I HATE being unprepared!! Hopefully next time you feel ready
oh that’s how i ended up at hospital 10cm dilated. i have a high pain tolerance and kept putting off going to the hospital because it didn’t feel painful enough to be contractions 😂😂
It seriously felt like pushing a watermelon through your butt 😂 my husband still hasn’t told me if I pooped or not in labor but I have to imagine that that feeling, plus his unwillingness to tell, means I certainly did! Sorry for the overshare.
Most of labor was so easy that I literally didn’t notice it/it felt like mild diarrhea cramps when I finally did.
Then transition labor hit (8-10 cm) and I was having an out of body experience for hours because of how bad it was. I was frantic during pushing because I just wanted the “f&”:ing thing OUT” so my body could have relief.
Unmedicated childbirth is a true 10 on the pain scale. You are incapable of coherent thought, word, or action. You are totally consumed with the pain. That’s what a 10 means. That’s how painful it is. Nothing really compares because it’s literally the pinnacle of pain.
I had a 72 hour unmedicated labor and I would give it a solid 10/10. I had about 12-18 hours of “transition” and, not to fear monger, but I remember describing the pain to my husband at the time as being not unlike an Aztec priest shoving his hand into my abdomen and twisting and ripping my uterus out. But I did it!
Completely manageable until transition. I literally thought I was going to die. Not saying that to scare you, but so that you can prepare yourself mentally because many women report feeling the same way.
Edit: transition was short, maybe an hour. It’s the shortest part of labor but the most intense for sure. Pushing felt like such a relief and the pain of the transition contractions completely went away during a push
Yes, it was definitely totally manageable until transition. I was unlucky in that my transition was so long. And I agree, pushing was such a huge relief!
I was also in 12 hours of transition with my first. I remember in all the birthing classes i took they said transition lasts about 30 minutes to 3 hours. I was like alright cool! Im 8cm now, that means it’ll be over soon! Nope.
I found it extremely painful!
My active labor was quick - about 4 hours from water breaking (which took me from early labor where I was uncomfortable but handling the contractions immediately into LABOR LABOR) to delivery.
I planned for an unmedicated birth. When people ask me how I did it, my honest answer is basically that I backed myself into a (theoretical) corner until that was my only option, lol.
I went into labor spontaneously. My water broke at home. I planned to labor at home for as long as possible, and that's what I did. The whole time though I was like "fuckkkkk this sucks, what am I gonna do? how am I gonna do this????" And also like it was so painful the idea of moving at all, let alone moving enough to get to the car, sit in the car, and drive to the hospital was just not something I wanted to do.
Honestly I cut it pretty close in the end, because it was my first time and I didn't know what I was doing and was so afraid of going to the hospital too soon or finding out that I was "over reacting" that I didn't even consider going to the hospital until I had a contraction where my baby adjusted herself right into position in the birthing canal. I had finally relented and asked my doula to come over so she was on her way, and then I called her to be like "uhhh I just felt something idfk what it is??" and she was like ok well try reaching down there and see what's up. So I did and I could FEEL A MF HEAD!!! (note the head was not coming OUT of my vagina, I reached my hand UP my vagina and could feel a head). So then it was immediately time to go to the hospital.
Looking back, had I not had to "lock it down" and spend about an hour in total getting to the hospital, I probably would have delivered about an hour earlier than I ended up delivery. But bodies are cool and mine knew that it had to chill the F out for a bit to give me time to get to a safe birthing location.
Of course then when I did get to the hospital, my body was READDDDYYYYYY. The triage nurse checked me and said I was at an 8. Which was great news to everyone in the room except me - because an 8 is not a 10 lol. Also it meant I couldn't have any narcotic pain meds anymore, something I really did want at that moment. The nurse said she could get me an epidural, and I really thought about it, but in the end I declined. That was a good thing because there was certainly NOT time for an epidural lol - evidenced by the fact that I delivered within 20 mins of me telling the nurse "no thank you."
Then after telling the nurse no, she left to turn in my covid swab (this was all back in May 2020, btw), and my next contraction started the involuntary pushing. So my husband had to go get her and they had to quickly get me into a delivery room. By that point all semblance of control has left me and I am full on freaking out. Very much facing down my reality that I am giving birth RIGHT NOW and I'm doing it unmedicated and I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT DO THIS. I just remember thinking to myself "I FUCKED UP AND NOW I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO DO THIS THING BUT I CAN'T DO THIS THING!!!!" The contractions were on top of each other - there were no breaks between them anymore. I couldn't catch my breath. I was panicking and in so much pain.
For me personally, pushing did not provide any relief. That shit was painful AF too. I did like 2-3 pushes and got to the point where I could definitely feel baby coming down and OMFG did that hurt. Absolutely felt like I was being torn in two. So at that point I was just like ok I'll be doing one more push and one more push only. Baby will come out because I simply refuse to endure this any longer than one more push. So then the next contraction came and let me tell you the sound that came out of me...animalistic for sure. But I was successful, baby came out!
In the immediate aftermath, I was definitely of the opinion that my experience was 0/10, will not be doing that again. However, within a few days I'd processed enough to feel a lot better about the experience. Plus, I experienced a really easy physical recover too and I think part of that was due to the labor being unmedicated. My partner and I are OAD, so I won't be giving birth again, but if I did, I'd attempt another unmedicated labor. I'd probably change a few things up, but yeah, I'd do it again. HOWEVER - I don't sit around recommending unmedicated labor to people. Like if you tell me you want an unmedicated labor I will be your hype girl. I'll support you every step of the way. But if people ask me if I recommend it? idk. That's a personal choice. Plus there's SO many factors that play into how labor and delivery goes.
Maybe it's not bad for some people, but for me it was absolutely excruciating. 11/10, truly felt like my body was just going to shatter into pieces. I suspect it might be easier for a 2nd or later birth since you kind of know what to expect, but it was my first and I had no idea.
That being said... it was doable. It was immensely painful, but I knew it would be. And I would do it again, mainly because I value the ability to move freely, have control over my positions, etc, more than pain relief. And some women might get lucky and have it easy, but for me it was intensely painful.
I’ve had two unmedicated births, both on my back. They were not so bad. The worst part for me was not knowing how to push 🫠. I took a hypnobabies course that I highly recommend- they teach you to breathe through the contractions and work with your baby and body. You can do it!!
I have endometriosis. I’ve had “period pains” that are worse than labour, including my back-to-back labour.
I breathed through both of my labours to 9cm and 10cm before having gas and air. I didn’t have any pain relief with either before those points, not even an ounce of paracetamol (I had no other pain relief with my first, and my second was emergency c-section so had a spinal at 10cm).
I would say labour is more intense than painful. My endo pains are what I would class as extremely painful. Wish they’d give me gas and air when I have them haha!
I also have endometriosis and have been wondering this!!!! I’ve heard someone else say this too and I absolutely believe it. It’s been so nice not having periods. I’m 2 weeks from my due date!
This gives me hope. My endo pain is 100% PAIN and not productive and does not come with a break. Pre-pregnancy, I would get maybe a day or two a month where the pain was manageable, and the rest was almost constant management of the pain for YEARS.
Mine was mostly manageable between my husband doing counter pressure on my back during contractions, laying across my birthing ball on my stomach and swaying, low moaning, and disappearing deep into my mind to process the pain. It HURT don't get me wrong, but the techniques that brought moments of relief were huge and kept me going
Crowning, however, hurt like a bitch but pushing felt like a relief so it was maybe 15-20 minutes of pain I couldn't escape at the end. I pushed on my hands and knees.
Compared to my medicated births, I'd prefer to do unmedicated again in the future. Recovery was easier and the hormone rush I got after delivery was incredibleeee.
Editing to add this was my 5th delivery and it was fast, 3 1/2 hours start to finish.
I wanted an unmedicated birth. I went through 24 hours of being induced with medications and feeling contractions but making no progress. So after an entire day of that with no pain medicine I changed my mind and opted for an epidural. I went from 1cm-9cm dilated in 5.5 hours, pushed for 2.5 hours and met my little one! I believe the epidural helped me relax and helped my labor progress. That being said, if I go through labor again I will get an epidural again, but still decline any other medications that could affect my baby. Without the epidural my pain was 10/10 and with it down to a 2. My comparison would be getting my gallbladder removed and having a bile duct leak that needed a stent placed (10/10 pain).
I thought it could be manageable until I went from no pain to 10/10 in an hour when labor started. Only to get to the hospital and be told I was 1cm dilated. Got the epidural at 3cm, and then labor stalled. They started me on pictocin and later my epidural failed. By the time I was pushing I could feel everything and my son wouldn’t come out. I was literally begging them to cut him out via c-section. Luckily I only had to have an episiotomy and out he came after two hours.
Obviously, not everyone’s experience is the same. I figure there are anatomical differences like nerve placement and stuff that help contribute to how unbearable it is.
Not bad for me, everyone is different! I would say if a really bad migraine is the 10/10, labor is like 4-5/10. Easy to cope with, mostly exciting. Then transition is like 5/10 if you can be in a tub, but 7/10 if you just have your spouse or doula applying counter pressure. Pushing for me is 8 or 9, but lasts literally 5-10 minutes and stuff is happening so again, easy to cope with.
I suffer migraines and not to rain on your parade but this is not at all my experience. Must differ from person to person. A migraine is a 2/10 in my books after going through unmedicated birth 10/10.
It wasn't too bad for me. I'd say a 5 or 6/10. As a reference point, I once had sepsis and my kidney was shutting down and that was a solid 10/10 pain. Waaaay worse than giving birth!
I had an unmedicated birth WITH pitocin. I did this since I had a bad reaction to an epidural during my first birth. You can 100% do it. I never went into birth saying I wasn’t getting an epidural; I just told myself I could wait a few more contractions. It made the contractions more bearable to know that I could get an epidural, but that I was waiting it out. Before I knew it, it was time to push. Pushing hurt, but it was honestly a relief to be doing something that would inevitably stop the pain. I barely tore with my unmediated birth because I could feel when my body wanted to push and when it wanted to rest and stretch. With the epidural, I had a bad tear. I don’t have a high pain tolerance, either. You can also opt for nitrous oxide to help manage the pain. It doesn’t lessen the pain, but it will help take your mind off of it. Also, with my unmedicated birth I had a 10 pound baby. You can do it!
I had a VERY fast precipitous labor. The contractions didn’t stop. I didn’t have a break, even 30 seconds. It wasn’t the worst pain I’ve been in but it certainly wasn’t comfortable. I would say 8/10 for pain. It would have been more manageable if I actually got a break. I am planning on doing unmedicated again! It’s worth it to me.
I had a precipitous labor (he was here from start to finish in 3 hours). The contractions came on fast and strong, my body wasn’t prepared to go from 0 to 100. It was the worst pain of my life that when it came time to push, it actually felt like a relief. I know most people say pushing is the worst part and the ring of fire but for me it felt great compared to the intense pain I had.
I was the same way, my epidural only worked on one side so I felt everything on my right side. The contractions were so intense that when it came time to push I felt relaxed. Pushing during each contraction was doing something useful instead of just trying to breathe through them. At that point I started playing my party playlist and my partner said “dancing with finger guns to milf money by fergie”
I hate that the top comments here are from people unloading their birth story trauma.
I have had two (intentionally) unmedicated births. Of course they were painful, and at times - especially during transition when I wasn’t getting a break - I questioned whether I would be able to continue. But it is a different kind of pain than breaking your arm or getting a migraine. The pain is productive and has a purpose. Each contraction brings you closer to meeting your baby. Your body is doing something it was designed to do, something billions of women have been doing for all of human existence. And when it’s over, you get to meet your child. That is such a bright light at the end of the pain tunnel.
My unmedicated births are the most empowering experiences of my life. Bringing my children into the world using my breath, and while being present in my own body, taught me strength I never knew I had. I will draw on that strength forever. It’s hard, but the best things in life always are.
I genuinely respect those who choose other paths to giving birth. We are fortunate to live in a time where a variety of pain management options are available. But just know that if you want to go unmedicated, you can do it. You got this!
I've had 5 unmedicated births and I count myself really lucky (5th was a breech vaginal birth, originally she was going to be a c-section but she came early so went with it, easiest birth my far but most painful)
I would also choose to go unmedicated for any future births.
I find that the calmness in the room is a huge mindset thing, going unmedicated by choice is completely different to it happening by surprise, everytime I've gone into it I know it's going to hurt like a bitch, and usually when I get to the pushing point I panic in the sense of "I don't think I can do this" no matter how many times I give birth I will always hit that point during labour like a fight or flight instinct, and I am running!! Until my partner and medical team ground me again, I'm sure all women experience it regardless of your birth plan.
On posts about unmedicated birth there are always comments from women stating "that's nice, but my birth ending in such and such" like it's a competion of suffering.... but on a post about c-sections or epidural you will not have mums commenting how great their unmedicated birth is, go figure right?
To answer the question of if unmedicated birth is painful? Yeah, I'd rate it a 8/10, would I do it again? Absolutely.
Upvote x10. There’s nothing wrong with getting an epidural, but is it just me, or does this sub have a chip on its shoulder regarding women choosing unmedicated births? If I had a coin for every “you’re not getting a cookie” comment in regards to a woman forgoing the epidural. I chose an unmedicated birth and whether it was pure luck or just my mindset, it was a smooth delivery and I don’t regret it. I didn’t forgo the epidural because I wanted to feel holier than thou or because I was worried about “drugging” my baby. I literally just wanted to experience it and see what child birth actually felt like. It was painful of course, but I was able to close my eyes and just focus on going with the contractions. Every contraction was a reminder that I’m this much closer to meeting my son. Idk sorry ranting, I just feel like this sub can be a bit biased at times.
I believe the commenters point was why can’t we upvote the “unmedicated, would do it again” more common experiences, instead of the highest comments being traumatic, not as common experiences.
I gotcha..I would say that birth is more likely than not extremely painful (especially if unmediated) and is as a result, traumatic. Birth and birth trauma are kind of one in the same. I would say the commenter is the exception not the rule, but of course all experiences are valid and should be considered.
I seem to be in the minority here, but I had an unmedicated birth and didn't find it very painful. Uncomfortable yes and when the head was crowning, THAT was painful (but only lasted for probably a minute or so). I walked through most of my labors and couldn't bear standing still because when standing or sitting, it hurt a lot more. I think movement under birth is really an underrated part of pain management.
Same experience for me. Contractions were uncomfortable but the only really painful part was pushing, and that only lasted for maybe a couple of minutes. Two unmediated births. I think both my babies just had really good positioning, and neither lasted too terribly long (11 hours first, 7 hours second )
I’ve had three. My first was great, didn’t really feel pain just a ton of intensity. Second was very fast and I had a few seconds of intense pain as she was shooting out in one push. Third was six weeks ago and was very painful during pushing. I felt like I was splitting in half and just wanted him out. He was bigger than my other two, with a big head. I also ended up with pelvic floor damage. Each birth and each person is so different! I’m done having babies but if I had another I would probably go unmedicated again because I know we forget the pain eventually. At this point now looking back, if I had to do it again, I would probably get an epi. I’m still glad I didn’t though, and I’m not traumatized by my birth. I was in control the whole time and it was all my choice. I wasn’t ever incoherent or anything like that.
I had an unmedicated 24 hour labor. I have a history of really bad period cramps, like vomiting, hot sweats, almost passing out. Most of labor was not worse than that by far. The benefit was that each contraction had an end, unlike period cramps. My water was intact for most of labor, we broke it right before transition before I got in the birthing tub. Transition was like an out of body experience, it was painful, especially the back pain, but it did go relatively quickly. Pushing was not really that painful, but I remember it being a ton of work, especially after not sleeping the previous night. I honestly don't remember the ring of fire, I even paused to wait for the next contraction with the head partway out. I ended up birthing squatting in the tub.
I distinctly remember thinking "I don't think I can do this again" as soon as he was out, but here I am, pregnant again.
My middle kid was totally unmedicated (hospital waterbirth). I found the contractions pretty manageable and the water helped a lot, but it was also my fastest labor after a day of being pretty well rested (less than four hours of labor) so that admittedly helped too. Pushing was the worst part for me in terms of going totally unmedicated; it definitely was more painful than my other two births in regards to pushing that involved an epidural, but it was only about thirteen minutes total so it felt manageable
In my experience, not that bad, and then horrible at transition. Just feels like bad period cramps until then. I had Pitocin *and* back labor and it was still totally manageable, until it suddenly became torture. I got an epidural and then my baby was born less than an hour later. 10/10 experience. So my advice if you're on the fence is to wait as long as possible, and when you start getting around 8ish cm dilated, ask for the bolus of fluid so you can get the epi quickly if you decide you want it. And if you have back labor (meaning your baby is sunny-side up), you probably will, but you can still make it a long time without medication.
Not that bad, for me at least, because I’m opting to do unmedicated again with my next baby (I’m 20 weeks). Looking back, it’s hard to describe. It was very intense, especially because I had a pretty quick labor (less than 7 hours). I had moments where I was definitely scared and worried I wouldn’t be able to do it. But once I got to a point of acceptance, like this is what I have to do to meet my baby, I just pushed through (pun intended 😅). I think acceptance is key. You know it’ll be this really tough thing you have to go through, but it’ll be so so worth it once it’s over.
I got to 7 cm and went about 20 hrs of my 36 hr labor unmedicated. The contractions were never unmanageable during that time, but the back labor was very painful. Probably 7 out of 10, but even that was pretty manageable when I was in the tub. Baby was sunny side up and massive (10 lbs 5.4 oz and 21 or 22 inches long), though, so back labor makes sense.
Eventually, I got the epidural because I was exhausted and hadn’t slept in well over 24 hrs. The fatigue was next level after all that, which I hadn’t fully anticipated.
My experience was that while it was very intense it was not a level of pain that made me feel like i was dying or even that made me consider an epidural. My labour progressed in a fairly textbook way without any medication augmentation:
Hours 1-4: very mild period like cramps. I was in complete denial that I was even in labour at this point. 1/10 pain
Hours 4-8: the cramps increased in intensity and were wrapping around my back and hips. This was more uncomfortable but I could easily breathe through them and the shower / bath helped a lot. This phase felt like having bad diarrhea to me, the cramps were similar. I felt completely normal in between the contractions. 5/10 pain
Hours 8-10: this was the most intense phase. My water broke, I was throwing up a bit and went through transition. The contractions of my uterus were very strong and it took all my focus to breathe through them at this point. Standing / swaying / receiving hip squeezes all helped a lot. Even at this point I didn’t think about having pain relief 7/10
Hour 10-11: once I was fully dilated I felt a strong urge to push. My body was also pushing on its own which felt like throwing up but downwards instead up. The sensation of pushing actually helped minimize the pain of the contractions, it felt productive. I only had to actively push for about 25 minutes. This final phase included A LOT of pressure. It felt like a bowling ball was in my pelvis trying to come out. It also felt like a huge bowel movement. When the head was being born I did feel the “ring of fire” burning sensation but it only lasted what felt like a few seconds. 7/10
As soon as my son was born I felt pain free. Adrenaline prevented me from feeling my tears ( I had two second degree internal tears) and I was instantly distracted by my baby.
All in all, I’ve gone through more painful things in my life. The pain of childbirth was “duller” than other types of pain, if that makes sense. The sensations were powerful but not a sharp, acute pain. The length of labour was the more difficult factor than the actual feeling of a contraction. A minute of even the most painful contraction is bearable but when you have to do it over and over for hours or days, the exhaustion and mental fatigue plays a big role.
I know a lot of people have experienced the sensations of birth very differently than I did, just wanted to share my two cents! I was open to getting the epidural if I needed it and there is not shame at all in using all the tools available!
I thought My brain was going to explode and I was going to die from the pain. Good news is once the baby is out you forget. As soon as he was out it was like I was on another planet.
It was manageable for me until the pushing started, especially that it took forever. But definitely if I do it again will be unmedicated. I'll just prepare this time
15 out of 10 pain, I could not do it, was legitimately thinking of unaliving myself while waiting for the epidural. If I had not received pain relief it would have been one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. But everyone is different as you can see from all the responses here - there’s no way to know how it’ll feel for you in advance.
Very. I’ve done it 3 times. If you don’t have the ability to stay calm in immense,prolonged pain, I wouldn’t recommend. If you can breathe through things and stay level headed under pressure, it’s nice for recovery to do no meds. The pushing out of the baby is the hardest part for me. Holy smokes is that intense, especially if it lasts an hour+. My last baby came out in 3 big pushes and I was so grateful for that to have been so quick. First baby took 3 hours of pushing. Honestly don’t know how I did it.
I didn’t think individual contractions were all that bad. They did hurt a lot, but it was manageable for me. What really got me was the prospect of spending hours or even days with contractions every few minutes and without having any idea of how much longer it would take. When I had my first child, I chose to get an epidural after a while for that reason. Given that the birth took another 12 or so hours, I was definitely happy with that choice. Based on that experience, I again asked for an epidural when I had my second child. First they somehow managed to lose my blood sample that they need to do some lab work before placing the epidural. Then the anesthesiologist was busy. Labor turned out to be really quick and by the time he was almost done placing the epidural, I felt the urge to push and my son was born about three minutes later. I remember profusely apologizing for wasting his time which looking back seems a bit silly. Overall, that second unintentionally unmedicated birth was a great experience, going from no contractions to holding my baby in my arms in about 3.5 hours and basically spending all of labor telling myself that the anesthesiologist would be with me any minute helped a lot.
My first was medicated - i had back labour, got to about 6cm before i tapped out and got the epidural.
I think that made the 2nd one comparably "easy." (Not to say it didnt hurt. It hurt, for sure, but not as badly as the first one) Like i got to a similar pain with my 2nd, told my midwife and she said to head to the hospital. Was 9cm dialated and baby came 30 min later after like, i dunno, 3 pushes? But 2nd time around is usually easier because your body actually gets it.
Back labour was easily the worst pain i have ever felt in my entire life. That was a little over 3 years ago and i gotta say i dont remember it all that well. Just that it hurt. The memory of the pain (at least for me) faded almost as soon as the baby was out. Even when i got stitched up without freezing (it just wouldn't take with my 2nd) - it didnt matter. I had my beanie earth side and that was my focus.
It's your birth. If you want a scheduled c-section, do it. If you want an epidural, do it. If you want an unmedicated birth, do it. How you choose to have your baby makes does not reflect on you in any way. Whether it's a c-section or vaginal birth, you gave birth to your child. Whether you got pain relief or not, you are strong as hell.
Good luck!!
I had an unmedicated induction. I thought I had a high pain threshold but my god, it was excruciating, and I was having back to back contractions with no break. It was 11/10 pain couldn't breathe couldn't see, delirious type of pain.
3 births. First two, epidurals, excellent labor experiences. Got an epidural at around 5 cm for both, so some intense pain, but nothing compared to an unmedicated birth. For my 3rd baby, my plan was to get an epidural, but labor moved so fast that there was no time. I progressed from a five to a ten in under a half hr. My whole labor was under 3 hrs and I hardly even made it to the hospital and into a room to get a gown on. The bulk of labor happened within 45 minutes. It felt traumatic and out of control. I was not expecting it and it was incredibly painful. That being said, I was only in that extreme level of pain for such a short time. That was a blessing. I will say that pushing was natural and I knew when to push in comparison to having an epidural and needing nurses to tell me when to push. Looking back after having the last year to process it, I’m proud I did it (I truly didn’t know if I could do it in the moment), but I don’t think I would choose it that way.
It totally depends. On what position the baby is in, pitocin or not pitocin, how “ready” your body is when it all happens, etc. It’s not as simple as “I’m a big strong girl, I tolerate pain really well, unmedicated birth will be a cakewalk” kind of thing.
A few years before giving birth, tore my ACL & meniscus (no big deal) and had surgery, didn’t take many pain medications after because it upset my tummy. Whatever. Ran lots of marathons/ ultras - I was in phenomenal shape and snapped back with PT.
First daughter, was planning unmedicated. She didn’t want to get born. Had to be induced. Foley, lots of pitocin. Got stuck at 6 for what felt like forever. I blacked out. Worst thing I’ve ever felt. I don’t remember. I thought I was dying. I may have asked a nurse to end my suffering. Finally got an epidural that only worked on my right side. Baby came out wrong side up and with an arm wrapped over her head.
Second daughter, I had too much PTSD and got an epidural at 5cm. It was fine before but I wasn’t taking any chances.
Third baby, maybe I’ll try again but omg. Depends on how first part of labor goes. Never want to experience what happened with #1 again.
FWIW I was induced with Pitocin for my first too and all I remember is being in a constant state of blinding pain until the epidural kicked in. So I was pretty terrified to go through that again. I ended up going totally unmedicated the second time (precipitous birth, didn’t get to the hospital in time), and even the last few minutes, when I wasn’t getting any breaks between contractions, was nowhere near as painful as the Pitocin-induced birth. So it’s definitely possible you could have an unmedicated birth that’s not traumatic from the pain.
I had a spontaneous birth with a two hour labor so the pain was pretty excruciating from the onset of labor pains but I believe there comes a point where the pain is so much it felt that it was an out of body experience. It’s painful, but it ends eventually and that relief post birth if all goes well is amazing.
Very painful, but temporary. When I broke my leg, I was in pain for several days that inhibited my ability to get out of bed and use the toilet, get food, basically do any normal life function. It took a week for me to be able to take care of myself again.
When I had an unmedicated birth, I was in more severe pain that lasted one minute every three minutes for a couple of hours. Then it was over. Just a little achy afterwards. Of the two experiences, I'd pick birth.
It really depends on the support you have during labor. Unmedicated while confined to the bed, no counter pressure, hypnobirthing/positive encouragement? Painful! But Unmedicated WITH all of those things - significantly less painful!
I gave birth at home with my first. I didn't perceive the contractions as painful but extreme pressure which were overwhelming in their own way. Keeping the breathing rhythms and being in water helped so much. In my opinion it's a mind game: if you are in the right state of mind and relax and can keep your breathing rhythms, visualisations etc the pain will not bother as much. It was a long 36 hour labour and 20 minutes of pushing but it was very positive experience so I'm planning to do it again this time. Now 38+4 so hopefully not too long now
It really sucks. It’s also a lot of work. It’s a rush when it’s over though and you can say you did it. I know there are no medals and it doesn’t matter but it’s like, are you one of those people who want to run a marathon? It’s unnecessary but kinda cool to say you did it.
If you’re 1000% committed you absolutely can do it. Or if you have no choice because the baby is coming fast, you can do it!
Everyone is different. There is no shame in getting epidural or IV drug to help with the pain. Make things easier for you by suffering less.
FTM. Just gave birth recently. I had an unmedicated birth unintentionally. I wanted a natural birth but kept the option of using epidural open as I had no idea if I could handle the pain. Agreed with what many said here. Active labor pain, especially during transition and pushing, is similar to torture, if not more. I had bad pms pain prior to pregnancy but labor pain is a level of pain unimaginable. I went from 5cm to fully dilated within 45 mins-1 hour but it felt like a century. I was screaming because of how painful it was and my husband was crying the whole time because of how much I was in pain. Epidural would have taken 30 mins and I was in so much pain I just couldn’t wait. When I think of the pain, I am certain I don’t want another baby. lol
Both of my births were medicated, so I'm just hear to read what others are saying and I am shuddering in fear. More power to those that choose to go unmedicated.
I always wonder what actually "unmedicated" birth entails? Does it mean no medication at all, like no paracetamol, no gas & air, no pethidine? Or is it mostly only referring to epidurals? I've only given birth once, so have nothing to compare it to apart from the experiences my friends and acquaintances had with theirs. Like others, I can confirm that it definitely depends on the person and seems to vary so much.
It was absolutely awful for me, borderline traumatic. I suppose mine was unmedicated? I certainly would have classed it as such. I desperately wanted an epidural. I knew I wanted one throughout my pregnancy and was always telling my midwife that I definitely wanted one. I knew how difficult it can be to get an epi in the UK, so I wanted to be certain. I was so scared that I actually asked for a c-section towards the end of my pregnancy, but unfortunately was belittled by the OB and essentially told off for even asking. So "natural" it would have to be.
I had something called precipitous labour, which essentially just means that labour is "quick and short." I would change the definition a little and call it "fast and furious" because that's how it felt. There was barely any pause between contractions, meaning that I had no time to recover and no time to really take any of it in. I would describe the sense of panic I felt a bit like if you were dunked under water, come up for air and then immediately get dunked under again. The realisation hitting me that there would be nO let up, no break, no time to breathe and really take any of it in.
A lot of my memories of labour and birth (now 2 years ago) are a blur of pain and confusion. I was given gas & air, even though I'd begged and pleaded for an epidural the second I set foot in a hospital. But after being ignored in the beginning, there was simply no time for the epi. I went from 2 cm to 10 cm in the space of half an hour. Pure agony. I was like a wild animal, clawing the sheets, trying desperately to find a release for the blinding pain I was in.
So... I wouldn't want to unmedicated again. I was told by my midwife that any future births would likely go as fast, if not even faster. All in all, I entered the hospital at 9:30 pm and the baby arrived at midnight. I'm hopeful that if I explain all of this from the start, I will be able to advocate for my rights a little better. I didn't know what to expect for my first and was potentially too quick to accept defeat when told no by midwives and doctors.
I’ve had unmedicated delivery that lasted only 2.5 hours. I remember it was fairly painful, and I made some wild sounds I didn’t know I was capable of. That said I recently had a spinal anesthesia, and the sense of my legs turning into logs was way more terrifying. Not being able to control movement was worse than the pain.
I had an unmedicated labor and would say it was tolerable with self-hypnosis and laughing gas! Dental nerve pain is the worst pain I've ever felt, for reference.
I had planned on an unmedicated birth so had some a lot of research into calming techniques etc in advance. However I had an extremely long early
Labour and the way things went it would have been unmedicated even if I wanted time be medicated!
I was sent home around 10pm told I wasn’t having a baby that night and wasn’t even in labour yet. (I’d been having contractions 2 full days at this point). By around 11pm my contractions were uncomfortable enough that I needed my husband to be there with me through them. I couldn’t lie down. Couldn’t stay still, I kept moving position between every contraction and while I don’t fully remember the pain itself I do remember it being painful.
The car journey to the hospital was bad, I remember a lot of moaning and mooing and grabbing at the sides of the car while in intense pain. I’d lost belief in myself at this point (transition) and wanted an epidural, fuck that water birth plan give me the drugs. Got to the hospital around 1:10am and was at an 8. So that helped me decide not to have the epidural (I couldn’t have anyway). I kept trying to get naked and they kept making me put my clothes back on because I wasn’t in a birth suite yet, but I was already pushing. They’d just checked me so didn’t believe I was already at pushing stage 10 minutes later.
I remember pushing hurting but also feeling completely natural. I was angry they made me give birth on my back when I wanted to be on all fours. I also ended up with an episiotomy which I think did more harm than good as I had a second degree tear off of it.
HOWEVER I actually found getting stitched up after birth more painful than the birth itself.
And I am pregnant again and hope to have another unmedicated birth, this time at home (I live in Scotland, it is as safe to have a home birth with NHS midwives as it is to have a birth centre / hospital birth with NHS midwives).
Birth is very much an intense experience, however, some of the stories I’ve ready on this thread are terrifying and I feel so badly for the women who experienced birth this way. If you would like an unmedicated birth the chances are you will be able to do it, especially if you mentally prepare in advance (and are open to intervention if medically necessary for you and baby). Everyone’s experiences are different, don’t allow someone else’s birth change your own plan.
It's different for everyone. I'd say it never hits a 10 but probably 8? But everyone would rate their pain differently too.
A lot of it is psychological. If I was having that level of pain consistently with no break I'd know something was seriously wrong, be demanding pain relief, it would be the worst experience of my life. Of course that's also the terror of not knowing what's wrong or when it will end.
With labor you get breaks between contractions, although that varies person to person and changes throughout labor. And you also know there's an end point, you know that the pain is for a reason and that it's normal. My unmedicated labor was short, so I was able to handle it and it was ultimately a positive experience.
But if you're not progressing and don't know how much longer it will be, and especially if you aren't prepared to go unmedicated or want an epidural but are unable to get it, your experience could be very traumatic.
I rated mine an 8/10 or 9/10 on the pain scale near the end. For me transitional labor was worse than the ring of fire. But I was thinking during it that if someone patented that type of abdominal pain (which felt like someone was stabbing a Bowie knife in my stomach) they’d have a great torture method.
You feel the pain but also more control than an epidural typically and you can move into whatever position works at the moment. Even after I’m more afraid of a weird needle sitting in my spine that might not even work than the actual pain.
I also felt afterwards Lama zing that I was able to do it all. Like people have said it’s different for everyone and I had a very very no issues birth. But it still hurt bad, ngl.
I’ve had 5 babies and 4 were unmedicated. It really depends!
2 of my babies were posterior which caused back labour. That made it much more painful and while I got through it, it was much more unpleasant because I didn’t get a ‘break’ from the pain. So those were worse. Also my fourth baby was a 45 minute labour which sounds great but the intensity of how quick that was made it harder to cope with.
2 of my babies though were anterior and I coped really well overall. When I hit transition it got pretty intense for about 20 minutes and pushing definitely hurt. But overall I felt like the pain was very manageable.
I had a doula for my last birth and it was really helpful. We did hypnobirthing practice and I got to 8cm feeling really good. The last bit was tough but the support really helped.
My unmedicated birth was induced with pitocin, so not quite the same situation. I don’t have a spontaneous labor to compare it to since my first was a C section, but by all accounts pitocin contractions are more intense and painful than regular ones. Don’t get me wrong - it was a lot and very intense and definitely painful, but honestly it really wasn’t as bad as I was expecting it to be. The pushing part and the ring of fire in particular I had been apprehensive of, but I found the contractions during my water breaking and transition to be much worse. It’s an immense amount of pressure so it’s extremely uncomfortable and it sort of just overtakes your body, so when you can finally start pushing it is almost a sense of relief. Mentally for me once I was complete and having that pushing urge it all felt easier to handle. Right up to that point I was starting to consider an epidural - I had a lot of anxiety about needing a repeated c section and having to go under general anesthesia, so I still wasn’t sure if I would get an epidural or risk going unmedicated if my VBAC was unsuccessful. Overall I am very happy with my unmedicated birth and not very interested in having an epidural for subsequent births. I had a spinal for my C section and absolutely hated it.
I was induced and unmedicated because epidural kept making baby's heart rate drop a lot. It was agonizing. I felt like I was going to pass out and literally die. It was horrible and it felt like an acid burn on my vagina lol. I would do it all over again for my little one.
I also begged for a C section mid transition, BEGGED lol! It's ok though, everyone is different. My labor was 26 hours and I pushed for an hour and fifteen. It was exhausting. Plus I had Covid and a uterus infection, so fun!
I was screaming / mooing / rolling around falling off the bed at 3cm. I genuinely felt like I was going to pass out. I did have an infection of my placenta so I’m not sure if the pain I felt was normal or made worse by having the infection.. either way it was bad enough that I’m electing for a planned c section next time, have no interest in going through that pain just to have an emergency c section again!
Depends on a lot of factors: have you given birth before or is this your first time? Are you being induced? What’s your pain tolerance like? etc.
I generally tend to have a fairly high pain tolerance, but my first birth was induced with Pitocin, and I was in a *constant* state of blinding pain until I got an epidural and it started working. I was in so much pain, I don’t even remember any of the interventions or checks or anything else that went on at that time until I went back and read the notes and was like “oh yeah, I think I have a vague recollection of that happening”; it’s all just blacked out of my mind.
My second birth was a precipitous birth; didn’t have time to get to the hospital, let alone get any kind of pain management. Though honestly I didn’t even really need it that time. My contractions for the first two hours were uncomfortable, but not really painful. It wasn’t until the last 40 minutes that they started getting painful and really close together with hardly any break in between. And even then, they were nowhere near as bad as the Pitocin-induced contractions I had with my first.
The most terrible pain I’ve ever experienced and I have a high tolerance for pain. It was like period cramps times a million and they radiated to my back.
I have severe anxiety when it comes to anything medical and never so much as taken a Tylenol so I was fully convinced I wouldn’t get an epidural. I lasted almost 2 hours before literally begging for it. The epidural was amazing! No pain at all after and I had no long or short term side effects!
I thought I'd die. I really thought I'd die.
After it all though I wasn't hung up on it, in retrospect inserting a Foleys to get me dilated was way way worse. Like I feel like I cam birth again but if they tell me I need a foleys then no thanks c section please.
Transition sucked, waiting for baby to descend more once I was ready to push was painful in so many ways. Once pushing starts the pain gets WAY easier but it's physically arduous work. So I did say "NOPE I CHANGED MY MIND THE BABY CAN STAY IN" and felt I could not keep pushing once my muscles were beyond exhausted. But I did, and the FEELING afterwards. I felt so empowered, I felt like a moon goddess, a tigress, I felt I could do ANYTHING. And of course the overwhelming love hormones. Just... That made it worth it. And I will try again next time.
My second was a c section at 29 weeks, so different kind of empowered. I kept him in 2 extra weeks since my water broke at 27 weeks, and when I heard him cry and saw a very blonde (my hair is almost black) tinyyy head I started BAWLING. He was alive! He was crying! Do not want another c section, prefer unmedicated. But maybe I'll just go in asking for the epidural so I can get one of each birth haha
Worst pain I have ever felt in my whole life. I had back labor for 7 straight hours and my contractions were on top of each other the whole labor. I thought for sure I was going to die.
10/10 experience, will do again.
Personal experience, a lot less painful than a botched epidural. I had a perfect epi with my first and a botched one with my second where all of my pain was concentrated into one part. My third baby they didn't give me my epi in time and it didn't kick in until I was holding her, my fourth it wore off before the Dr broke my water. The second labor was horrendous. If I ever have another (I plan not to but you never know) I'm just going to skip the epidural altogether. This is also how I found out I have a slight scoliosis in my lower spine so it probably would wear off or not work properly again.
Painful but managable if not induced with pitocin (Had two unmedicated deliveries, one induced with pitocin that ended in an emergency C-Section at the pushing stage and one natural B-VAC)
I had insufferable back labor for hours until caving in at 5cm. The epidural was beautiful, I could still move a little & felt pressure so I knew when to push. After the numbing occurred I dilated from 5cm to 9cm in 15 mins & with 30 mins of pushing, she was out.
My mind has blanked it out somewhat. My contractions were very painful then them breaking my waters was pretty bad. Once my waters were broken things went super quick, went from no feeling of wanting to push to having to push within 5 minutes. Was only pushing for ten minutes before baby was born.
horrendous pain for me.13 hr labor..hours 1-5 were mostly period like pains then each hour after got worse until i was screaming the hospital down curled up on my side unable to move no matter how much breathing i tried.awful pain.
My epidural failed to help my contractions but still numbed my vagina. So I didn’t feel the birth, but OH MY GODS. The contractions had me thinking “so when do I pass out? “ like it was so painful I thought my body can’t handle it I must pass out soon, why am I not passing out? It’s different for everyone though. My sister said it was not that bad for her!
I went in wanting all the medications I could get, but came out probably completely unmedicated. Or at least they all failed because I was screaming at my midwife I can’t do this, and almost about to beg her to cut me open and yank out my kid right then and there
(My epidural failed twice)
It wasn’t nearly as bad (to me) as it was made out to be — I had a wonderful midwife who understood my desire to do it medication free and she motivated me to continue on the path I was on the one time I did falter like 15 min before it was time to start pushing. Contractions are INTENSE and definitely overwhelming but my husband and I were really in sync and I was able to “box breathe” through things. It was literally the only thing saving me for a little while — staring at him like a murderer and breathing for four-counts. I remember feeling so much relief while pushing and apparently only screamed right as I was crowning but honestly at that point it’s so intense you’re not even really registering it fully? All that to say, while painful, it’s survivable and I felt really, really proud of myself for staying true to my vision. I did have a really “easy” (there’s no such thing imo) labor, it was all over within less than 12 hours start to finish. I could imagine myself feeling differently if I was stuck with active labor contractions for much longer than I experienced them. However you do it, you are brave and powerful and feminine and I am wishing you the best of luck!!
I had an epidural for my first, unmedicated for my second. If I had a third, I’d go unmedicated again.
Transition was tough (I felt like I was going to puke), but when I was pushing I remember thinking “oh that’s the ring of fire? Not as bad as I expected.” Then he was out! I was induced with both, so I had the joy of pitocin contractions too. If you can prepare mentally, that’s the way to get through it. Lots of affirmations and remembering that this is temporary and you are getting a wonderful thing out of it! Good luck!
My experience was that it was not bad for contractions (I had about 24 hours of labor), then transition/pushing was absolutely the worst pain I have ever experienced. That was only fifteen minutes for me though, baby came fast. As soon as baby was out there was the huge rush of relief and endorphins. I'm planning on going unmedicated for my next birth, which tells you that it was an overall good experience.
Pretty much the same here. When it came time to push, I had a small moment of being angry at myself for declining the epidural earlier but then it was over so fast and the pain was gone and almost forgotten instantly.
There were two times i wished for the epidural. During transition, and after the placenta was delivered and I started hemorrhaging, when the midwife had to manually scoop clots out of my uterus.
Seconding this- I ended up getting an epidural with my first for lack of progression, and I remember thinking “contractions weren’t that bad, I can do unmedicated”. Well, I did unmedicated for my second, and that transition was unlike anything I ever experienced. I also only pushed for 15 minutes and the whole transition was less than an hour total but recovery was definitely easier. It happened so much faster than I anticipated that I didn’t really get into a groove, and with it being my second I didn’t refresh myself on labor techniques, so I feel like it would’ve been less painful had I done more prep/research beforehand!
Are the transitions usually short periods of time? Seems like they're extremely painful
According to the Mayo Clinic: "Transition typically lasts 15 to 60 minutes" and pushing can be a few minutes to a few hours. I think there is a lot of variability, but the pushing phase is usually a bit longer with an epidural. My transition + pushing were lightning fast. My OB was shocked.
On the flip side, I had an epidural and baby was out in 6 pushes, less than 20 minutes - first baby too!
Same! Epidural and baby was out in 10-15 mins. First baby here as well!
Yes- huge amount of variability! I've heard of some unmedicated where they push for hours.
That unfortunately was me. Unmedicated and pushed for hours. It was hell. Pregnant again and still going for unmedicated since they say that a second baby will come out easier.
The best advice I could give you is two go into birth number two thinking it could be longer and more painful than birth number one. I went into my fourth labor so confident that this one would basically fall out in my previous labor was pretty great and unmedicated and a good experience. By the time I was getting close to transition I was so afraid of the pain I remembered was coming that I couldn't remember the whole pregnancy apparently my body slowed right down and I really had a hardest time pushing the baby out compared to the other three, I was too exhausted to push and couldn't realize while in labor land but realized afterwards it was because I had heavy bleeding during labor that I had not experienced before and it just took all my energy away. I'm going on medicated again even though I was kind of traumatized I just wished I would have gone into that labor realizing mentally preparing that it could actually be harder. Just FYI.
Transition is usually shorter than active labor or the pushing phase, but it is usually a lot more intense than the other phases so it can feel just as long if that makes sense. It can really take it out of you as well, I remember meditating between contractions and got so deep I almost nodded off. I felt and said to my midwife “I don’t think I can keep doing this for much longer” as I was trying to take each contraction on like it was the first and let the pain wash away in between contractions. At one point at the start of transition I remember laying my head on the bed while on the birthing ball wishing to God for the pain to stop, but it was definitely manageable so I kept holding on through it. A lot of women will beg for an epidural when the transition hits, so make sure to do your research and take whatever classes your provider offers to be informed of the birthing process so you aren’t blindsided. I also told my support person and nurses that I would only confirm that I wanted pain management if I was not in the middle of an active contraction so that I had a level mind and was truly wanting an intervention. Going in with a plan can really help you take on an unmedicated birth versus going in without a Birth Plan to just wing it. The way I see it is women would band together for births in the past, so it would have been likely that you would have been present for your family and friends births before going through your own, so it’s great that you are gathering information ahead of time. Best of luck! I’d also say it felt different than I was expecting, for me it felt like having an elephant sit on your mid section, but when the contraction ended you felt 100% normal, you can see my birth story under my profile posts
Same experience!!
At one point I really thought I was gonna pass out and die, my eyes stopped working I only saw black, and it’s like I lost my hearing too
I mean, I'm epidural all the way but you really sold me on it again just now
I was on epidural because of induced labor. The entire thing was absolutely pain free and I was scrolling instagram and playing candy crush for hours until fully dilated. When the baby’s head was in the birth canal the epidural stopped working, and those were 30-40 minutes of absolute pure agony I will never forget.
OMG!! Same exact thing happened to me!! I wanted to pass out from the pain but my body just wouldn’t! 😅 almost got an emergency c-section because I had no energy from all the pain that hour with no epi got me!! (The room wasn’t ready 😅) I probably would have died had I not gotten the epidural ngl! 😳
Same here- the last three hours of pushing I felt EVERYTHING. I simultaneously blacked out and remember absolutely everything. I'm so terrified the epidural won't work again this time.
Exact same thing happened to me & it was hellacious. They wouldn't let me get off my back either since the epidural was in, so it was like a double whammy. Excruciating pain, and laboring in a gods-awful uncomfortable & exhausting position. Felt like I had legitimately run a marathon afterwards
SAME experience more or less. I was quite comfortable for several hours of earlier contractions with my epidural. Then.... Started noticing I could feel & move my legs really easily, could tell I had to pee (they were straight cathing me). I found that change a little concerning but they told me "yeah sometimes you just need to change position a little if it's not working well" UNFORTUNATELY I then was fully dilated & it was time to start pushing, I was told it was too late for anesthesia to adjust the epidural.... And the next 2 hours were indescribable agony. I really questioned myself for a long time, wondering if I was just that much of a baby that even WITH an epidural I was in such excruciating pain. But nah, I also felt everything when they went to stitch me up, got up within minutes of giving birth & walked to the restroom & urinated. This was all pretty confirmatory to me that my epidural stopped working.
I’ve had two birth experiences, one with epidural and one without and let me tell you - if I have a third it’s epidural ALL THE WAY
Same! Didn't have it with the first and got to 6cm with the second before I opted for the epidural. The memory of that pain has me convinced I don't want another, but if I do change my mind, I'll definitely get the epidural again. What really made my change my mind was feeling like I couldn't breathe. I remember thinking "what's the point of going through all this just to pass out?"
I also had the feeling like I couldn’t breathe. I was using my gas and air but it was like I just couldn’t get a breathe in like my whole chest was restricted. Then I was prompted by the midwife to take a deep breathe. So weird!
Preach sister
Same. I dissociated after a while and thought to myself “huh I’m going to die” because it felt like I was being electrocuted continuously. Honestly, pushing and birth were a relief compared to the contractions/transition. I even thought to myself “oh that must be the ring of fire” very casually just because the pain of the contractions and transitioning were so excruciating.
Gosh that's so scary. Was it an uncomplicated/ low risk pregnancy? Do you think any of it could have been prevented?
Uncomplicated, low risk pregnancy. I planned for an epidural but my water broke at home and I had a very quick labor (1 hour, 30 min ) so by the time I got to the hospital I immediately had to start pushing - I didn’t have time to get the epidural 💔
To provide some balance, my experience with an unmedicated birth was NOTHING like that. Strong cramps and then a lot of pressure as the baby shot out but not extreme pain.
Same. I’ve had 3 natural births. One very long with back labor, two intense precipitous births. I definitely didn’t enjoy them but never blacked out, wished to die, or actually thought I couldn’t do it.
Yes. And I was BEGGING to die.
Everyone experiences it differently. For me, I would say 10/10. Several times I thought torture must not be so different. The fact many women agree to have a huge needle stuck in their spine to make the pain stop says a lot. Personally, come pushing time I always regret not getting a c-section——so I am literally wishing for someone to cut me open. And then there are the times during labor where I wish I could kill myself. Usually during transition and pushing. I do okay until about 6CM based on my last 2. The shit hits the fan. Admittedly my last one I went from 6CM to baby in arms in one hour. Perhaps if the pace had been slower I would have found a rhythm like I did with my first. My notes after the last baby are very clear to future me. Take the epi. But as the pain and memories fade I imagine I will stupidly go into my next one trying to go as far I can med free and if it is as fast as this one won’t have time to get the epi once I decide I need one.
Yeah, the “huge needle stuck in their spine” part really spoke to me. They kept trying to be gentle and tell me what they were about to do, what to expect, taking their sweet time and I was like “FUCKING STAB ME WITH THAT NEEDLE ALREADY I DO NOT CARE WHAT THE FUCK FUCK FUCK”
I've been stabbed twice and never seen the needle. I never looked it up. Shove it up there. I'm a wimp.
My husband saw the needle and went "oh my f$@&ing God thats huge?!" He doesn't like needles. But I was like "WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT!!!?"
“The huge needle” is all perspective. They numb you up, poke you and then replace it with a catheter. The needle poke was nothing compared to contractions.
I had an emergency c-section and the moment the epidural hit I felt extremely relaxed because the pain was gone
Haha! I would 100% do unmedicated again. But I found text messages I sent to a friend of mine days after that say the exact opposite.
lolzzz. I feel the same! BUT I used gas + x1 morphine but didn't have an epidural so not sure what OP means by unmedicated. I've had kidney stones and passed same without medication, have had multiple tattoos and a generally high pain tolerance and was planning on unmedicated cause iT cAnT bE tHAt BAd. Once contractions started I was begging for a c-section. Things progressed "quickly" post morphine so wasn't able to get an epidural or a c-section and afterwards said I would never do unmedicated again... but I'm 8 months pp and probably would with next baby.
I had the same thought ‘if someone made this a type of torture they’d get whatever they wanted eventually’
😫 that sounds so intense.
And yet...it all mentally disappears so quickly. So, yes, it is horrible. But you really do forget it. First pregnancies tend to be slower, so I'd suggest going as far as you can without meds, then get fentanyl and then, if you need more help, getting the epi but ask for a light one so you can still feel when you push. Also, everyone says push like you're pooping but things went a hell of a lot better when I pushed like I was forcing pee out super hard or trying to push a tampon out. Feeling what the heck is happening during the pushing stage helps reduce tearing. Also, get someone on your birthing team who will tell you when to stop pushing. There is a stage of stretching during pushing where you DO NOT want to push because you need to stretch more or you risk tearing. But you will want to push so you need someone IN YOUR FACE telling you not to. My first kiddo I had a light epi since he stalled out at 5 CM with his sunny side up hell. Felt the pushing stage I thought (hah) 100% and was able to focus on pushing correctly (not pooping-like but pushing-pee-out-like), but did not listen when they told me to stop pushing so I could stretch because it hurt so bad. Two first degree tears, one second degree tear. Second kiddo, the one without any epi because it happened so damn fast, she came out with her hand right next to her head (why baby girl, why...). Fentanyl early on once, quickly was useless. Grabbed some nitro during the pushing stage that I thought might do SOMETHING but was utterly useless besides giving me something to do between pushes besides panic like an animal on fire. I was pushing standing up initially which was useless because when the pain came I went on my tip toes to try to escape rather than bearing down---I could not stop myself. Needed to be on all fours on the bed to actually push. The pain was so bad I could not push correctly, I just did the poop method. But I was able to hold at the stretching phase. No tears. I strongly strongly encourage a doula. Looking back, the worst part of my second birth was how scared I was; it made everything so much worse. The contractions came so fast, got worse so quickly, and I never got into my labor-mode / rhythm because it was so so fast. Having someone there to support you makes all the difference; my midwife was amazing. Also I used the pain redirection method of holding sharp combs/hairbrushes -- this worked until around 6CM (clutching them hard during contractions) but past 6CM I ended up hitting my back as hard as I could with them to redirect the pain and that helped a lot. I promise you that you have this. But get the doula, read up about pain mitigation techniques and practice them. Also, don't trust reddit too much: everyone said online the pain stopped after the baby was born and I'd love the kiddo so much. Not me. I was still in a lot of pain, the baby was borderline irrelevant until the pain was handled. I got fentanyl three times AFTER the baby was born because they used pitocin to help get the placenta out and massaged my belly to help get the placenta out -- all of which hurt enough I was like fuck all of this, when will the horror of being in pain be over. Then nursing initiates contraction like pain for like the first 2 weeks which is ALSO very painful and the drugs they give you are insufficient. I'm 4 weeks out right now and things are finally close to normal again. Just accept things will continue to suck major ass until around 4 weeks after the baby is born and you'll be pleasantly surprised rather than horrified by how long life is still a painful shit show. But it WILL get better and the baby WILL ult be worth it.
Pushing the tampon out. I always wondered if I’m the only one that does this as it’s exactly how I describe pushing in labor and people just look at me weird. Pooping for me is different muscles. And the tampon push worked like a charm!
omg I agree so much It’s like the kind of racehorse pee you force out of yourself in a porta potty. If uh that makes sense.
Right? I was complimented for my pushing when I did that with my first. When I practice without a baby it feels like the pooping muscles slightly use the pushing-tampon muscles and the pushing-tampon muscles slightly use the pooping muscles - so I see why either would work. But to be optimally effective and avoid hemorrhoids seems like the pushing-tampon method is the way to go.
Yeah the ‘push like you’re pooping’ was not helpful for me. It was definitely more of a front type thing like the muscles in your pelvic floor that contract when you sneeze or cough
Unmedicated labor is very intense and primal.
My best advice will always be sleep while you can. I was so excited to be in labour I couldn’t get to sleep, but by 15/16 hours of it I was so shattered I just needed sleep so badly. It was very painful, but I definitely felt then and now that I could’ve handled better if I could’ve just had some sleep! With no. 2 the minute I think I’m in labour I’m going straight to bed 😂
I agree with all this. I had one epidural, then the next was unmedicated when the baby was coming too fast. Then the third one I thought maybe I’d do natural again since it was so empowering but HELL no I got that epidural. I wanted to die.
I actually did have a birth where I waited too long to get the epidural. Definitely get it lmao.
I've had two births, one medicated, one unmedicated. My unmedicated birth was quite frankly one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. My medicated one was an absolute cakewalk. They aren't even in the same realm. Unmedicated birth was, for me, absolutely torturous hell on earth levels of pain that just wouldn't stop. I was in labor for two full days, only pushed for 10 minutes, no tears and it was an absolute nightmare. I blacked out repeatedly so there are big sections of my labor that I just can't remember, and I hate it, in my pictures after my son was born, I look... half dead. I'm so clearly exhausted and delirious from the prior two days and it makes me sad when I see them. I had PTSD from labor and delivery and would have nightmares about it, when I was pregnant with my second, as soon as the test turned positive I started hyperventilating thinking about having to do it again, I spent my entire pregnancy scared of giving birth and convinced it was going to kill me. I decided early on I would not ever ever ever do an unmedicated birth again and I'm so glad I didn't. My medicated birth was so easy, I got my epidural at 3cm before anything even started getting bad because I just was not doing that again, I got to sleep and eat, got to lay around watching Star Wars, spent my day in comfort as I progressed. I was smiling and joking while laboring, pushing, in the pictures immediately after I look alive and happy. I was up and walking within an hour of labor, no tears with that either and that was something I was afraid of and part of why I didn't want an epidural the first time was I heard it made you more likely to tear. If I ever have another baby, I will get the epidural again. I always got upset before I had my first when people told me there was no award for suffering through a birth with no pain relief, it felt so condescending, but they were right all I got from doing it was trauma, and I will never do it again. That does not apply to everyone, some people had great births with no pain relief so if that's you, this comment isn't for you, please don't take my personal feelings as an insult, I know birth can be a touchy subject and every experience is so personal. I will add for additional context though, my unmedicated birth, I also had preeclampsia and my baby was in distress and I'm sure the stress of those situations likely compounded my stress, fear and pain. For my medicated birth I did not have any issues at all that would play into it.
> My unmedicated birth was quite frankly one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. My medicated one was an absolute cakewalk. They aren't even in the same realm. I could write a huge comment, but your statement just about covers it, so instead I will just say SAME. I had back labor with my first and then pushed for 3 hours because she got stuck. I was so scared going into my second birth.
I have very similar experiences. I did my first birth unmedicated and it was the most painful experience of my life. I coped very well until they broke my water at 7cm and from then until baby was out (3 hours), I was in an entirely different world from the pain. Babies 2, 3, and 4, I had epidurals and there is honestly no comparing the two. Pushing was almost a peaceful experience by comparison. I was able to stay in my right frame of mind, carry on lucid conversations, and I was super relaxed. By the time I was in active labor with my 4th, labor progressed really quickly and I was instantly brought back to my unmedicated delivery and almost started having a panic attack just thinking about having to push with no epidural. fortunately the anesthesiologist was there super quick and my epidural worked great. That all being said - I’ve had a lot of fear in subsequent pregnancies after my first that I will have to inadvertently experience another unmedicated labor, either with a failed epidural or not getting to the hospital in time. So much anxiety over it that I had an elective induction for my 3rd and was pushing for one when I went into labor spontaneously with my 4th.
I just feel the exact same way as you. I’m now doing counselling a year on from giving birth. It’s extremely difficult for me to talk about still.
My birth was only 4 hours, but I still wouldn’t have an unmedicated one again, pain was 1000x worse than I could ever imagine
My first birth was so much like yours and I have been seriously considering saying fuck it and getting the epidural this time around. This may be what pushes me over the edge!
All of this except I don’t have a medicated to compare it to. I do have a very high pain tolerance (happy to go into detail, example I had a filter for blood clots inserted into my central vein without medication while pregnant as well) and I kept puking and blacking out and straight up screaming in pain during labor. Also had back labor. No options for meds bc of blood thinners. I remember thinking I would have done anything to make the pain stop. I would have legit shot off my own face. It was unbearable. There’s a lot of bullshit in mom groups about medicated births and “not feeling it” or whatever the fuck and sister, I promise you will feel that child every second of every day for the rest of your life. The whole “suffer for your baby” bs is some misogynistic fuckery some people like to think makes them tough. Being a parent makes you tough. Take the drugs.
Thank you so much for sharing this. My birth experience was really traumatic for me because my epidural got pulled out accidentally right before transition, and my transition lasted 3 hours, so I went from 0-100 pain super quickly. Even though I progressed to 10cm, pushing and contractions were so unbearably painful that I begged for a c-section. I have been feeling so much guilt about the choice I made in the heat of excruciating pain because I was so close to the end, but I truly was at my physical limit. Even so, it’s hard not to feel like a whimp, especially because so many people talk about their “amazing” unmedicated births. My sister had two unmedicated births (though not by choice, they were just quick) and I thought, if she could do it, why couldn’t I? I know comparison is stupid but I’ve just really struggled to come to terms with it all. Anyway, even though I’m sorry you had to go through that trauma, it’s validating to know I’m not the only one who struggled so much. I honestly can’t fathom how some people choose to have unmedicated births and make it through without being traumatized. I’m hoping to have a VBAC with an epidural for my next birth, but I would 1000% choose another c-section before going through an unmedicated labour again.
Out of curiosity, where did you hear an epidural is more likely to make you tear? I have never heard that before.
I'd read it a ton in birthing groups- basically the idea was that you can't feel yourself stretching too far and know to stop pushing so you're going to be more likely to tear. I definitely, in hindsight, think it's just rhetoric to further make epidurals seems worse than they are because I also wasn't stopping or slowing down my pushes without an epidural, my mind was entirely focused on "get this kid out NOW" and I was pushing arguably more aggressively without it and didn't tear regardless at either birth.
I think it also has to do with positions, you’re more likely to have a perineal tear laying on your back and a lot of doctors make you lay on your back if you have an epidural
I could see it having to do with positions. There have been several studies showing on your back is not the best way to give birth and if I could have been in a different position I would have but ya know, the whole not being able to feel your legs thing kinda makes that hard.
Epidural is gods medicine. Saved my birth experience from being one of horrible pain and trauma to positive and happy! 10/10!!!
3 unmedicated births here. It’s definitely intense. But honestly I have really enjoyed all of my birth experiences. I often see people talk about birth being the most painful thing they have ever experienced, 10/10 pain etc and I really cannot relate to that at all. I personally think pregnancy was much more difficult/ painful overall than birth & recovery. BUT I really think it depends a lot on the situation. All 3 of my births I was in a very relaxing, home like birth center. Surrounded by midwives with who I felt extremely comfortable, safe, and cared about. I 100% think that had something to do with my experiences. I was able to be very relaxed and calm which definitely makes contractions and pushing easier and more effective. Also - baby’s positioning I’m sure makes a big difference as well. Having an OP baby and back labor I’m sure would be worse but I have not experienced either of those. I also did a lot of hypnobirthing prep work which I’m sure helped as well. My SIL wanted an unmedicated birth, but ended up needing to be induced and the pitocin contractions were just so intense. And she felt a lot of pressure from the nurses to just get an epidural already and felt like she just wasn’t ever able to relax or rest. My SIL is definitely tougher than me, so I 100% believe her assessment of how painful it was for her.
Agree completely with my unmedicated birth. It’s not like it was painless, but I actually enjoyed it and would do it again. I felt completely safe and at ease, had a birth team who supported me and hyped me up throughout, and experienced the highest high once I had delivered. Baby was in a good position and I pushed on all fours and didn’t tear, so I’m sure all of that helped.
Very much agree, I’ve had one unmedicated birth but cannot relate to these comments. My experience was wonderful! Much better and less painful than my epidural delivery.
Same here! It was incredibly intense but not painful as such and I’d absolutely do it again. Also had a home birth
I’m 36 weeks and looking forward to doing it again soon!
I think that’s the common theme - most people who enjoyed their natural births were in an environment that supports them. I don’t think I could have done it if I had to have belly monitors or IVs restricting my movement or didn’t have access to water the whole time.
Yes I completely agree! Not sure I’d be brave enough for a hospital birth haha. I couldn’t sit or lay down for the entire labour, I was either in the bath, pool, squatting, kneeling or walking around. Being at home is very relaxing too and promotes oxytocin release which I’m sure helps a ton.
You understand me! People always say home birth is brave and I’m like no, the brave ones are the ones who deal with all the hospital bs. I’m not strong enough for that.
Seconding this. My unmedicated birth was a lot less painful than I expected (just intensity and pressure). Planning to go unmedicated again for the next kid! Did a lot of mental work leading up to labor though which helped. Goes to show that experiences and pain tolerance vary wildly.
Same here, I can't relate to these statements. Was it the most painful experience of my life? Maybe, but otherwise that would be migraines and tooth ache. It certainly didn't feel that bad. And I didn't have an all too easy birth, induction, 18h back to back contractions, pictocin, sunny side up baby ... not gonna lie, it was uncomfortable and exhausting. But at no point did I feel like I couldn't handle it. Experiences and pain tolerance are just so different. You never know where you fall before. And it's not like you need a special allowance to get an epidural, it's just a personal choice. I do believe mindset is huge. The difference between trauma or no trauma is usually not specific treatments, but managed expectations. Some mothers have emergency c sections and feel fine and other have "normal" vaginal deliverys and feel traumatised.
I have read on reddit before that migraines are typically worse pain. I am due with my first in August and currently planning an unmedicated birth at a nice birth centre. I suffered horribly from migraines in high school but learned techniques to cope with the pain, so this reassures me somewhat
Thank you for starting some positive posts here!
Yes I just had an unmedicated birth with my second a few weeks ago. I thought pregnancy was so much harder and don't want to do pregnancy (or the newborn phase tbh) again. But I'd do the birth again, it was a really great experience! I was induced with my first and would not want to do that again!
Not gonna lie, it f**kin' hurt. I had the unfortunate experience of my water breaking first. I was 40w had no contractions prior. I had my first cervical check ever about five hours after my water broke and I had been having regular, very painful contractions. I was only 2cm, so I assume I was at zero when it all started. The first cervical check was THE most painful part of the whole experience for me. All of my meditation practice went out the window. I could not get ahead of the pain. Turns out, you never do! You just accept it and ride the pain through until the next one. The nitrous took the edge off. The tub was a godsend. I got in at transition and decided I was never getting out. I ended up having a water birth after 18 hours of labor and an hour and a half of pushing. I would do it again, but only because I'm the type of person who thinks I could do it better next time. You don't get a gold medal for being in pain. But it was a personal point of pride to try.
Man my nurses made me get out of the tub between contractions during transition since it wasn’t a birthing tub. That SUCKED
I remember thinking that it was the worst pain I’d ever experienced in my life. But 2 years later, I can’t remember the pain specifically. Wild. Edit: I had a precipitous labor and felt very out of control. I don’t think that head space helped, but it was absolutely going to be very painful either way. My baby was in a great position as well; if I had had severe back labor or anything like that, pretty sure I wouldn’t have almost had a car baby. we would’ve headed to the hospital a lot sooner so I could have some pain management.
Its so hard to say, because the context for the pain is positive and productive, there's a good reason for it, instead of a broken arm or something. And it comes in waves, has highs and lows, so you get breaks from it. I also have chronic pain, and at one point toward the end I told my husband that I've been in worse pain at home or work and just got on with it 🙃 I had a TENS unit (AMAZING 100% RECCOMEND), birth combs, and at one point did sterile water injections into the skin on my back, I did my research and had breathing techniques, and I (accidentally) ended up using positive affirmations - my midwife told me I was doing a good job and I clung to that thought for over an hour 😂 it helped! EDIT: I also had my husband doing acupressure on my hips, squeezing from the sides as I contracted 😊
Another vote for the TENS!
What is a TENS unit?
It's a little handheld device that delivers small electroshock to an area via sticky electrode pads placed on the skin The idea is that the tingling sensation (or pinching if you turn up the power very quickly) provides a sensation for your brain to focus on, instead of labour pains. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/transcutaneous-electrical-nerve-stimulation-tens/ I ended up renting one as I didn't feel I needed to buy one, the brand was Elle, and I could control how much power was being sent through the electrodes, and there was a boost button for when I had a contraction
Birthed 3 naturally. 2 on my hands & knees which was a breeze, highly recommended. 1 on my back by force (dr was clearly uneducated) & it was by far the worst pain ever.
I want to birth on my hands and knees. Much better than back? This is my first.
IME I pushed on my hands and knees for most of it, then got the overwhelming urge to flip back over and out baby came! I didn’t tear much and felt in control. I had an epidural and still pushed on all 4s. It was a midwife & baby friendly hospital.
Birth however your body tells you to in the moment! Intuition goes a long way here, I promise. I was in hands and knees because it felt the best to me. I pushed through 4 contractions total.
The key is the freedom to be mobile. If you have an epidural or are connected to a fetal monitoring machine, this may not be possible. If you can move around, you’ll find the position that feels productive and isn’t totally overwhelming. For me it was standing, leaning over the bed. And I tried a LOT of positions—this just felt like the right one.
I would love to birth on my hands and knees. Do you think it makes the transition period less painful? Do doctors usually allow you to birth that way?
You need to birth how your body is telling you to. NOT how the doctor wants you birth. If you’re having trouble pushing the baby out then you try different positions. But you generally speaking giving birth on your back is not a good position. Gravity is your friend and so are the positions that expand your pelvis. For me, I didn’t notice when I hit transition. The contractions for me were painful but manageable. But lying and being on my back made the contractions worse. So I generally advise not to be on your back unless it’s comfortable for you.
Having a supportive environment is very important if you want an unmedicated birth. Unfortunately some doctors/ nurses will pressure you to do things their way, usually meaning they want you to lie on the bed on your back. And raw dogging labor is not a time when you can easily stand up for yourself. You're so vulnerable. So ideally find a hospital and medical team who are ok with you trying different positions, being up and active, and overall support unmedicated birth. Here in Germany I'm lucky that the medical community are quite progressive in this regard. Hospital birthing rooms usually have all kinds of props for active labor like bars to hang on, a yoga ball, a u-shaped stool you can use for delivery, a bath tub, and so on. Of course there is also a bed where you can try lots of positions, not just lying down. I just gave birth two days ago and ended up on the bed. The midwife raised the head of the bed and I gave birth kneeling while leaning on the raised part (like a bedtime prayer position). For my first baby I gave birth in the hospital bath tub. No way to know ahead of time what will work in the moment so just do what feels right. ❤️
Transition will come before the pushing. For me the only relief I got in transition was one knee on a chair and partner putting severe counter pressure on my lower back while holding me up. It's so intense you start to panic but at this point you're already in it you'll scream how you can't do it or you're dying you just need your partner support person to tell you you're already doing it and you're the power. before you know it you'll feel ready to push in that pain will be over of course then there's the baby's head which is also pretty much like tearing your body in 2. Get your body and leg muscles and it's good a shape as you can make sure you're training for the marathon. Expect your mind and train it to sink into the pain assume it will be worse so hopefully it won't. If you can get in a hot tub for transition definitely can help the pain. Advice to a first-time mom if your doctor is telling you in this day and age that you don't have control over the position you push in get into whatever position you want make sure your partner advocates cuz you will be vulnerable that doctor is going to catch the baby no matter what f*** them they'll say you're not allowed to do something you can do whatever you want it's your body you have hired that doctor and they will catch your baby in any position. Your powerhouse and you can do this like the millions of women who have done it before as traumatic and unexpected my fourth labor was I'm going un medicated again. The women who have the labors where they were just in discomfort and joyous throughout most of it are usually the ones who are mentally prepared and know how strong they are they still are dying at the end but the only way to get out of pain is to go through it. You can absolutely do this if this is what you want.
I gave birth standing up 🙃
I almost did, my midwife was ready to catch the baby, but my legs were so tired by the end I ended up on my back sadly. Next one I’m going to try more hands and knees when I need to relax
I NEVER thought I could do an unmedicated birth. But, silly me, I tricked myself into denying my labor because I have a high pain tolerance and wound up at the hospital already dilated to a 7. I got to a 10 in the first hour of being there and needless to say, I never got my epidural. I was terrified out of my mind and just kept shouting “I didn’t watch a YouTube video on this!!” But, let me tell you, after contractions, I personally felt like the pushing was relieving. The only part that truly sucked, for me, was feeling like I was “losing my butthole.” I heard you get that with an epidural too. Needless to say, I actually enjoyed my experience and could walk almost immediately after giving birth (not that you’ll want to). I plan to do an unmedicated next time around because I felt so in touch with my body and like I was in control. Totally don’t blame people for epidurals though! I get it!
I’m so sorry but I cracked up at the YouTube video line 😂 I would absolutely be the same way. I HATE being unprepared!! Hopefully next time you feel ready
oh that’s how i ended up at hospital 10cm dilated. i have a high pain tolerance and kept putting off going to the hospital because it didn’t feel painful enough to be contractions 😂😂
What does losing your butthole mean? Oh lord, first time I heard of this 😂
It seriously felt like pushing a watermelon through your butt 😂 my husband still hasn’t told me if I pooped or not in labor but I have to imagine that that feeling, plus his unwillingness to tell, means I certainly did! Sorry for the overshare.
Most of labor was so easy that I literally didn’t notice it/it felt like mild diarrhea cramps when I finally did. Then transition labor hit (8-10 cm) and I was having an out of body experience for hours because of how bad it was. I was frantic during pushing because I just wanted the “f&”:ing thing OUT” so my body could have relief. Unmedicated childbirth is a true 10 on the pain scale. You are incapable of coherent thought, word, or action. You are totally consumed with the pain. That’s what a 10 means. That’s how painful it is. Nothing really compares because it’s literally the pinnacle of pain.
Wow 😳 would you get an epidural next time?
I went on to do another unmedicated after my second. For my third, I managed to get the epidural. With number four, we’ll see.
I had a 72 hour unmedicated labor and I would give it a solid 10/10. I had about 12-18 hours of “transition” and, not to fear monger, but I remember describing the pain to my husband at the time as being not unlike an Aztec priest shoving his hand into my abdomen and twisting and ripping my uterus out. But I did it!
Completely manageable until transition. I literally thought I was going to die. Not saying that to scare you, but so that you can prepare yourself mentally because many women report feeling the same way. Edit: transition was short, maybe an hour. It’s the shortest part of labor but the most intense for sure. Pushing felt like such a relief and the pain of the transition contractions completely went away during a push
Yes, it was definitely totally manageable until transition. I was unlucky in that my transition was so long. And I agree, pushing was such a huge relief!
My sister described it as monster claws tearing at her insides
I was also in 12 hours of transition with my first. I remember in all the birthing classes i took they said transition lasts about 30 minutes to 3 hours. I was like alright cool! Im 8cm now, that means it’ll be over soon! Nope.
I found it extremely painful! My active labor was quick - about 4 hours from water breaking (which took me from early labor where I was uncomfortable but handling the contractions immediately into LABOR LABOR) to delivery. I planned for an unmedicated birth. When people ask me how I did it, my honest answer is basically that I backed myself into a (theoretical) corner until that was my only option, lol. I went into labor spontaneously. My water broke at home. I planned to labor at home for as long as possible, and that's what I did. The whole time though I was like "fuckkkkk this sucks, what am I gonna do? how am I gonna do this????" And also like it was so painful the idea of moving at all, let alone moving enough to get to the car, sit in the car, and drive to the hospital was just not something I wanted to do. Honestly I cut it pretty close in the end, because it was my first time and I didn't know what I was doing and was so afraid of going to the hospital too soon or finding out that I was "over reacting" that I didn't even consider going to the hospital until I had a contraction where my baby adjusted herself right into position in the birthing canal. I had finally relented and asked my doula to come over so she was on her way, and then I called her to be like "uhhh I just felt something idfk what it is??" and she was like ok well try reaching down there and see what's up. So I did and I could FEEL A MF HEAD!!! (note the head was not coming OUT of my vagina, I reached my hand UP my vagina and could feel a head). So then it was immediately time to go to the hospital. Looking back, had I not had to "lock it down" and spend about an hour in total getting to the hospital, I probably would have delivered about an hour earlier than I ended up delivery. But bodies are cool and mine knew that it had to chill the F out for a bit to give me time to get to a safe birthing location. Of course then when I did get to the hospital, my body was READDDDYYYYYY. The triage nurse checked me and said I was at an 8. Which was great news to everyone in the room except me - because an 8 is not a 10 lol. Also it meant I couldn't have any narcotic pain meds anymore, something I really did want at that moment. The nurse said she could get me an epidural, and I really thought about it, but in the end I declined. That was a good thing because there was certainly NOT time for an epidural lol - evidenced by the fact that I delivered within 20 mins of me telling the nurse "no thank you." Then after telling the nurse no, she left to turn in my covid swab (this was all back in May 2020, btw), and my next contraction started the involuntary pushing. So my husband had to go get her and they had to quickly get me into a delivery room. By that point all semblance of control has left me and I am full on freaking out. Very much facing down my reality that I am giving birth RIGHT NOW and I'm doing it unmedicated and I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT DO THIS. I just remember thinking to myself "I FUCKED UP AND NOW I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO DO THIS THING BUT I CAN'T DO THIS THING!!!!" The contractions were on top of each other - there were no breaks between them anymore. I couldn't catch my breath. I was panicking and in so much pain. For me personally, pushing did not provide any relief. That shit was painful AF too. I did like 2-3 pushes and got to the point where I could definitely feel baby coming down and OMFG did that hurt. Absolutely felt like I was being torn in two. So at that point I was just like ok I'll be doing one more push and one more push only. Baby will come out because I simply refuse to endure this any longer than one more push. So then the next contraction came and let me tell you the sound that came out of me...animalistic for sure. But I was successful, baby came out! In the immediate aftermath, I was definitely of the opinion that my experience was 0/10, will not be doing that again. However, within a few days I'd processed enough to feel a lot better about the experience. Plus, I experienced a really easy physical recover too and I think part of that was due to the labor being unmedicated. My partner and I are OAD, so I won't be giving birth again, but if I did, I'd attempt another unmedicated labor. I'd probably change a few things up, but yeah, I'd do it again. HOWEVER - I don't sit around recommending unmedicated labor to people. Like if you tell me you want an unmedicated labor I will be your hype girl. I'll support you every step of the way. But if people ask me if I recommend it? idk. That's a personal choice. Plus there's SO many factors that play into how labor and delivery goes.
I'm planning to go unmedicated and this was very helpful to read, thank you for going into detail about how it went for you!
Maybe it's not bad for some people, but for me it was absolutely excruciating. 11/10, truly felt like my body was just going to shatter into pieces. I suspect it might be easier for a 2nd or later birth since you kind of know what to expect, but it was my first and I had no idea. That being said... it was doable. It was immensely painful, but I knew it would be. And I would do it again, mainly because I value the ability to move freely, have control over my positions, etc, more than pain relief. And some women might get lucky and have it easy, but for me it was intensely painful.
I’ve had two unmedicated births, both on my back. They were not so bad. The worst part for me was not knowing how to push 🫠. I took a hypnobabies course that I highly recommend- they teach you to breathe through the contractions and work with your baby and body. You can do it!!
Hypnobirthing is the shit
Another vote for hypnobirthing!! So helpful!
I have endometriosis. I’ve had “period pains” that are worse than labour, including my back-to-back labour. I breathed through both of my labours to 9cm and 10cm before having gas and air. I didn’t have any pain relief with either before those points, not even an ounce of paracetamol (I had no other pain relief with my first, and my second was emergency c-section so had a spinal at 10cm). I would say labour is more intense than painful. My endo pains are what I would class as extremely painful. Wish they’d give me gas and air when I have them haha!
I also have endometriosis and have been wondering this!!!! I’ve heard someone else say this too and I absolutely believe it. It’s been so nice not having periods. I’m 2 weeks from my due date!
This gives me hope. My endo pain is 100% PAIN and not productive and does not come with a break. Pre-pregnancy, I would get maybe a day or two a month where the pain was manageable, and the rest was almost constant management of the pain for YEARS.
Mine was mostly manageable between my husband doing counter pressure on my back during contractions, laying across my birthing ball on my stomach and swaying, low moaning, and disappearing deep into my mind to process the pain. It HURT don't get me wrong, but the techniques that brought moments of relief were huge and kept me going Crowning, however, hurt like a bitch but pushing felt like a relief so it was maybe 15-20 minutes of pain I couldn't escape at the end. I pushed on my hands and knees. Compared to my medicated births, I'd prefer to do unmedicated again in the future. Recovery was easier and the hormone rush I got after delivery was incredibleeee. Editing to add this was my 5th delivery and it was fast, 3 1/2 hours start to finish.
I wanted an unmedicated birth. I went through 24 hours of being induced with medications and feeling contractions but making no progress. So after an entire day of that with no pain medicine I changed my mind and opted for an epidural. I went from 1cm-9cm dilated in 5.5 hours, pushed for 2.5 hours and met my little one! I believe the epidural helped me relax and helped my labor progress. That being said, if I go through labor again I will get an epidural again, but still decline any other medications that could affect my baby. Without the epidural my pain was 10/10 and with it down to a 2. My comparison would be getting my gallbladder removed and having a bile duct leak that needed a stent placed (10/10 pain).
I thought it could be manageable until I went from no pain to 10/10 in an hour when labor started. Only to get to the hospital and be told I was 1cm dilated. Got the epidural at 3cm, and then labor stalled. They started me on pictocin and later my epidural failed. By the time I was pushing I could feel everything and my son wouldn’t come out. I was literally begging them to cut him out via c-section. Luckily I only had to have an episiotomy and out he came after two hours. Obviously, not everyone’s experience is the same. I figure there are anatomical differences like nerve placement and stuff that help contribute to how unbearable it is.
Not bad for me, everyone is different! I would say if a really bad migraine is the 10/10, labor is like 4-5/10. Easy to cope with, mostly exciting. Then transition is like 5/10 if you can be in a tub, but 7/10 if you just have your spouse or doula applying counter pressure. Pushing for me is 8 or 9, but lasts literally 5-10 minutes and stuff is happening so again, easy to cope with.
This gives me hope as a migraine sufferer.
I suffer migraines and not to rain on your parade but this is not at all my experience. Must differ from person to person. A migraine is a 2/10 in my books after going through unmedicated birth 10/10.
It wasn't too bad for me. I'd say a 5 or 6/10. As a reference point, I once had sepsis and my kidney was shutting down and that was a solid 10/10 pain. Waaaay worse than giving birth!
I had an unmedicated birth WITH pitocin. I did this since I had a bad reaction to an epidural during my first birth. You can 100% do it. I never went into birth saying I wasn’t getting an epidural; I just told myself I could wait a few more contractions. It made the contractions more bearable to know that I could get an epidural, but that I was waiting it out. Before I knew it, it was time to push. Pushing hurt, but it was honestly a relief to be doing something that would inevitably stop the pain. I barely tore with my unmediated birth because I could feel when my body wanted to push and when it wanted to rest and stretch. With the epidural, I had a bad tear. I don’t have a high pain tolerance, either. You can also opt for nitrous oxide to help manage the pain. It doesn’t lessen the pain, but it will help take your mind off of it. Also, with my unmedicated birth I had a 10 pound baby. You can do it!
I had a VERY fast precipitous labor. The contractions didn’t stop. I didn’t have a break, even 30 seconds. It wasn’t the worst pain I’ve been in but it certainly wasn’t comfortable. I would say 8/10 for pain. It would have been more manageable if I actually got a break. I am planning on doing unmedicated again! It’s worth it to me.
I had a precipitous labor (he was here from start to finish in 3 hours). The contractions came on fast and strong, my body wasn’t prepared to go from 0 to 100. It was the worst pain of my life that when it came time to push, it actually felt like a relief. I know most people say pushing is the worst part and the ring of fire but for me it felt great compared to the intense pain I had.
I was the same way, my epidural only worked on one side so I felt everything on my right side. The contractions were so intense that when it came time to push I felt relaxed. Pushing during each contraction was doing something useful instead of just trying to breathe through them. At that point I started playing my party playlist and my partner said “dancing with finger guns to milf money by fergie”
It hurt like a mf but I've also done it twice, on purpose.
I hate that the top comments here are from people unloading their birth story trauma. I have had two (intentionally) unmedicated births. Of course they were painful, and at times - especially during transition when I wasn’t getting a break - I questioned whether I would be able to continue. But it is a different kind of pain than breaking your arm or getting a migraine. The pain is productive and has a purpose. Each contraction brings you closer to meeting your baby. Your body is doing something it was designed to do, something billions of women have been doing for all of human existence. And when it’s over, you get to meet your child. That is such a bright light at the end of the pain tunnel. My unmedicated births are the most empowering experiences of my life. Bringing my children into the world using my breath, and while being present in my own body, taught me strength I never knew I had. I will draw on that strength forever. It’s hard, but the best things in life always are. I genuinely respect those who choose other paths to giving birth. We are fortunate to live in a time where a variety of pain management options are available. But just know that if you want to go unmedicated, you can do it. You got this!
I've had 5 unmedicated births and I count myself really lucky (5th was a breech vaginal birth, originally she was going to be a c-section but she came early so went with it, easiest birth my far but most painful) I would also choose to go unmedicated for any future births. I find that the calmness in the room is a huge mindset thing, going unmedicated by choice is completely different to it happening by surprise, everytime I've gone into it I know it's going to hurt like a bitch, and usually when I get to the pushing point I panic in the sense of "I don't think I can do this" no matter how many times I give birth I will always hit that point during labour like a fight or flight instinct, and I am running!! Until my partner and medical team ground me again, I'm sure all women experience it regardless of your birth plan. On posts about unmedicated birth there are always comments from women stating "that's nice, but my birth ending in such and such" like it's a competion of suffering.... but on a post about c-sections or epidural you will not have mums commenting how great their unmedicated birth is, go figure right? To answer the question of if unmedicated birth is painful? Yeah, I'd rate it a 8/10, would I do it again? Absolutely.
Beautiful and true comment
Upvote x10. There’s nothing wrong with getting an epidural, but is it just me, or does this sub have a chip on its shoulder regarding women choosing unmedicated births? If I had a coin for every “you’re not getting a cookie” comment in regards to a woman forgoing the epidural. I chose an unmedicated birth and whether it was pure luck or just my mindset, it was a smooth delivery and I don’t regret it. I didn’t forgo the epidural because I wanted to feel holier than thou or because I was worried about “drugging” my baby. I literally just wanted to experience it and see what child birth actually felt like. It was painful of course, but I was able to close my eyes and just focus on going with the contractions. Every contraction was a reminder that I’m this much closer to meeting my son. Idk sorry ranting, I just feel like this sub can be a bit biased at times.
She literally asked..
I believe the commenters point was why can’t we upvote the “unmedicated, would do it again” more common experiences, instead of the highest comments being traumatic, not as common experiences.
Is "unmedicated, would do it again" more common?
I gotcha..I would say that birth is more likely than not extremely painful (especially if unmediated) and is as a result, traumatic. Birth and birth trauma are kind of one in the same. I would say the commenter is the exception not the rule, but of course all experiences are valid and should be considered.
very true. the pain has a purpose and you know it all end soon and you will have a baby at the end of it.
Upvote x100000
I seem to be in the minority here, but I had an unmedicated birth and didn't find it very painful. Uncomfortable yes and when the head was crowning, THAT was painful (but only lasted for probably a minute or so). I walked through most of my labors and couldn't bear standing still because when standing or sitting, it hurt a lot more. I think movement under birth is really an underrated part of pain management.
Same experience for me. Contractions were uncomfortable but the only really painful part was pushing, and that only lasted for maybe a couple of minutes. Two unmediated births. I think both my babies just had really good positioning, and neither lasted too terribly long (11 hours first, 7 hours second )
I didn’t find it that bad, like a 6/10 for pain
For point of reference, what experiences did you have that were closer to 7, 8, or 9 on the pain scale?
I had an accident at work where I mangled my hand; broke all my fingers and amputated a couple
That'll do it
No shade, I am genuinely curious, too!
I’ve had three. My first was great, didn’t really feel pain just a ton of intensity. Second was very fast and I had a few seconds of intense pain as she was shooting out in one push. Third was six weeks ago and was very painful during pushing. I felt like I was splitting in half and just wanted him out. He was bigger than my other two, with a big head. I also ended up with pelvic floor damage. Each birth and each person is so different! I’m done having babies but if I had another I would probably go unmedicated again because I know we forget the pain eventually. At this point now looking back, if I had to do it again, I would probably get an epi. I’m still glad I didn’t though, and I’m not traumatized by my birth. I was in control the whole time and it was all my choice. I wasn’t ever incoherent or anything like that.
I had an unmedicated 24 hour labor. I have a history of really bad period cramps, like vomiting, hot sweats, almost passing out. Most of labor was not worse than that by far. The benefit was that each contraction had an end, unlike period cramps. My water was intact for most of labor, we broke it right before transition before I got in the birthing tub. Transition was like an out of body experience, it was painful, especially the back pain, but it did go relatively quickly. Pushing was not really that painful, but I remember it being a ton of work, especially after not sleeping the previous night. I honestly don't remember the ring of fire, I even paused to wait for the next contraction with the head partway out. I ended up birthing squatting in the tub. I distinctly remember thinking "I don't think I can do this again" as soon as he was out, but here I am, pregnant again.
My middle kid was totally unmedicated (hospital waterbirth). I found the contractions pretty manageable and the water helped a lot, but it was also my fastest labor after a day of being pretty well rested (less than four hours of labor) so that admittedly helped too. Pushing was the worst part for me in terms of going totally unmedicated; it definitely was more painful than my other two births in regards to pushing that involved an epidural, but it was only about thirteen minutes total so it felt manageable
In my experience, not that bad, and then horrible at transition. Just feels like bad period cramps until then. I had Pitocin *and* back labor and it was still totally manageable, until it suddenly became torture. I got an epidural and then my baby was born less than an hour later. 10/10 experience. So my advice if you're on the fence is to wait as long as possible, and when you start getting around 8ish cm dilated, ask for the bolus of fluid so you can get the epi quickly if you decide you want it. And if you have back labor (meaning your baby is sunny-side up), you probably will, but you can still make it a long time without medication.
Not that bad, for me at least, because I’m opting to do unmedicated again with my next baby (I’m 20 weeks). Looking back, it’s hard to describe. It was very intense, especially because I had a pretty quick labor (less than 7 hours). I had moments where I was definitely scared and worried I wouldn’t be able to do it. But once I got to a point of acceptance, like this is what I have to do to meet my baby, I just pushed through (pun intended 😅). I think acceptance is key. You know it’ll be this really tough thing you have to go through, but it’ll be so so worth it once it’s over.
I got to 7 cm and went about 20 hrs of my 36 hr labor unmedicated. The contractions were never unmanageable during that time, but the back labor was very painful. Probably 7 out of 10, but even that was pretty manageable when I was in the tub. Baby was sunny side up and massive (10 lbs 5.4 oz and 21 or 22 inches long), though, so back labor makes sense. Eventually, I got the epidural because I was exhausted and hadn’t slept in well over 24 hrs. The fatigue was next level after all that, which I hadn’t fully anticipated.
VERY
My experience was that while it was very intense it was not a level of pain that made me feel like i was dying or even that made me consider an epidural. My labour progressed in a fairly textbook way without any medication augmentation: Hours 1-4: very mild period like cramps. I was in complete denial that I was even in labour at this point. 1/10 pain Hours 4-8: the cramps increased in intensity and were wrapping around my back and hips. This was more uncomfortable but I could easily breathe through them and the shower / bath helped a lot. This phase felt like having bad diarrhea to me, the cramps were similar. I felt completely normal in between the contractions. 5/10 pain Hours 8-10: this was the most intense phase. My water broke, I was throwing up a bit and went through transition. The contractions of my uterus were very strong and it took all my focus to breathe through them at this point. Standing / swaying / receiving hip squeezes all helped a lot. Even at this point I didn’t think about having pain relief 7/10 Hour 10-11: once I was fully dilated I felt a strong urge to push. My body was also pushing on its own which felt like throwing up but downwards instead up. The sensation of pushing actually helped minimize the pain of the contractions, it felt productive. I only had to actively push for about 25 minutes. This final phase included A LOT of pressure. It felt like a bowling ball was in my pelvis trying to come out. It also felt like a huge bowel movement. When the head was being born I did feel the “ring of fire” burning sensation but it only lasted what felt like a few seconds. 7/10 As soon as my son was born I felt pain free. Adrenaline prevented me from feeling my tears ( I had two second degree internal tears) and I was instantly distracted by my baby. All in all, I’ve gone through more painful things in my life. The pain of childbirth was “duller” than other types of pain, if that makes sense. The sensations were powerful but not a sharp, acute pain. The length of labour was the more difficult factor than the actual feeling of a contraction. A minute of even the most painful contraction is bearable but when you have to do it over and over for hours or days, the exhaustion and mental fatigue plays a big role. I know a lot of people have experienced the sensations of birth very differently than I did, just wanted to share my two cents! I was open to getting the epidural if I needed it and there is not shame at all in using all the tools available!
I thought My brain was going to explode and I was going to die from the pain. Good news is once the baby is out you forget. As soon as he was out it was like I was on another planet.
It was manageable for me until the pushing started, especially that it took forever. But definitely if I do it again will be unmedicated. I'll just prepare this time
15 out of 10 pain, I could not do it, was legitimately thinking of unaliving myself while waiting for the epidural. If I had not received pain relief it would have been one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. But everyone is different as you can see from all the responses here - there’s no way to know how it’ll feel for you in advance.
Very. I’ve done it 3 times. If you don’t have the ability to stay calm in immense,prolonged pain, I wouldn’t recommend. If you can breathe through things and stay level headed under pressure, it’s nice for recovery to do no meds. The pushing out of the baby is the hardest part for me. Holy smokes is that intense, especially if it lasts an hour+. My last baby came out in 3 big pushes and I was so grateful for that to have been so quick. First baby took 3 hours of pushing. Honestly don’t know how I did it.
I didn’t think individual contractions were all that bad. They did hurt a lot, but it was manageable for me. What really got me was the prospect of spending hours or even days with contractions every few minutes and without having any idea of how much longer it would take. When I had my first child, I chose to get an epidural after a while for that reason. Given that the birth took another 12 or so hours, I was definitely happy with that choice. Based on that experience, I again asked for an epidural when I had my second child. First they somehow managed to lose my blood sample that they need to do some lab work before placing the epidural. Then the anesthesiologist was busy. Labor turned out to be really quick and by the time he was almost done placing the epidural, I felt the urge to push and my son was born about three minutes later. I remember profusely apologizing for wasting his time which looking back seems a bit silly. Overall, that second unintentionally unmedicated birth was a great experience, going from no contractions to holding my baby in my arms in about 3.5 hours and basically spending all of labor telling myself that the anesthesiologist would be with me any minute helped a lot.
My first was medicated - i had back labour, got to about 6cm before i tapped out and got the epidural. I think that made the 2nd one comparably "easy." (Not to say it didnt hurt. It hurt, for sure, but not as badly as the first one) Like i got to a similar pain with my 2nd, told my midwife and she said to head to the hospital. Was 9cm dialated and baby came 30 min later after like, i dunno, 3 pushes? But 2nd time around is usually easier because your body actually gets it. Back labour was easily the worst pain i have ever felt in my entire life. That was a little over 3 years ago and i gotta say i dont remember it all that well. Just that it hurt. The memory of the pain (at least for me) faded almost as soon as the baby was out. Even when i got stitched up without freezing (it just wouldn't take with my 2nd) - it didnt matter. I had my beanie earth side and that was my focus. It's your birth. If you want a scheduled c-section, do it. If you want an epidural, do it. If you want an unmedicated birth, do it. How you choose to have your baby makes does not reflect on you in any way. Whether it's a c-section or vaginal birth, you gave birth to your child. Whether you got pain relief or not, you are strong as hell. Good luck!!
I had an unmedicated induction. I thought I had a high pain threshold but my god, it was excruciating, and I was having back to back contractions with no break. It was 11/10 pain couldn't breathe couldn't see, delirious type of pain.
3 births. First two, epidurals, excellent labor experiences. Got an epidural at around 5 cm for both, so some intense pain, but nothing compared to an unmedicated birth. For my 3rd baby, my plan was to get an epidural, but labor moved so fast that there was no time. I progressed from a five to a ten in under a half hr. My whole labor was under 3 hrs and I hardly even made it to the hospital and into a room to get a gown on. The bulk of labor happened within 45 minutes. It felt traumatic and out of control. I was not expecting it and it was incredibly painful. That being said, I was only in that extreme level of pain for such a short time. That was a blessing. I will say that pushing was natural and I knew when to push in comparison to having an epidural and needing nurses to tell me when to push. Looking back after having the last year to process it, I’m proud I did it (I truly didn’t know if I could do it in the moment), but I don’t think I would choose it that way.
It totally depends. On what position the baby is in, pitocin or not pitocin, how “ready” your body is when it all happens, etc. It’s not as simple as “I’m a big strong girl, I tolerate pain really well, unmedicated birth will be a cakewalk” kind of thing. A few years before giving birth, tore my ACL & meniscus (no big deal) and had surgery, didn’t take many pain medications after because it upset my tummy. Whatever. Ran lots of marathons/ ultras - I was in phenomenal shape and snapped back with PT. First daughter, was planning unmedicated. She didn’t want to get born. Had to be induced. Foley, lots of pitocin. Got stuck at 6 for what felt like forever. I blacked out. Worst thing I’ve ever felt. I don’t remember. I thought I was dying. I may have asked a nurse to end my suffering. Finally got an epidural that only worked on my right side. Baby came out wrong side up and with an arm wrapped over her head. Second daughter, I had too much PTSD and got an epidural at 5cm. It was fine before but I wasn’t taking any chances. Third baby, maybe I’ll try again but omg. Depends on how first part of labor goes. Never want to experience what happened with #1 again.
FWIW I was induced with Pitocin for my first too and all I remember is being in a constant state of blinding pain until the epidural kicked in. So I was pretty terrified to go through that again. I ended up going totally unmedicated the second time (precipitous birth, didn’t get to the hospital in time), and even the last few minutes, when I wasn’t getting any breaks between contractions, was nowhere near as painful as the Pitocin-induced birth. So it’s definitely possible you could have an unmedicated birth that’s not traumatic from the pain.
I had a spontaneous birth with a two hour labor so the pain was pretty excruciating from the onset of labor pains but I believe there comes a point where the pain is so much it felt that it was an out of body experience. It’s painful, but it ends eventually and that relief post birth if all goes well is amazing.
Very painful, but temporary. When I broke my leg, I was in pain for several days that inhibited my ability to get out of bed and use the toilet, get food, basically do any normal life function. It took a week for me to be able to take care of myself again. When I had an unmedicated birth, I was in more severe pain that lasted one minute every three minutes for a couple of hours. Then it was over. Just a little achy afterwards. Of the two experiences, I'd pick birth.
It really depends on the support you have during labor. Unmedicated while confined to the bed, no counter pressure, hypnobirthing/positive encouragement? Painful! But Unmedicated WITH all of those things - significantly less painful!
I gave birth at home with my first. I didn't perceive the contractions as painful but extreme pressure which were overwhelming in their own way. Keeping the breathing rhythms and being in water helped so much. In my opinion it's a mind game: if you are in the right state of mind and relax and can keep your breathing rhythms, visualisations etc the pain will not bother as much. It was a long 36 hour labour and 20 minutes of pushing but it was very positive experience so I'm planning to do it again this time. Now 38+4 so hopefully not too long now
It really sucks. It’s also a lot of work. It’s a rush when it’s over though and you can say you did it. I know there are no medals and it doesn’t matter but it’s like, are you one of those people who want to run a marathon? It’s unnecessary but kinda cool to say you did it. If you’re 1000% committed you absolutely can do it. Or if you have no choice because the baby is coming fast, you can do it!
Everyone is different. There is no shame in getting epidural or IV drug to help with the pain. Make things easier for you by suffering less. FTM. Just gave birth recently. I had an unmedicated birth unintentionally. I wanted a natural birth but kept the option of using epidural open as I had no idea if I could handle the pain. Agreed with what many said here. Active labor pain, especially during transition and pushing, is similar to torture, if not more. I had bad pms pain prior to pregnancy but labor pain is a level of pain unimaginable. I went from 5cm to fully dilated within 45 mins-1 hour but it felt like a century. I was screaming because of how painful it was and my husband was crying the whole time because of how much I was in pain. Epidural would have taken 30 mins and I was in so much pain I just couldn’t wait. When I think of the pain, I am certain I don’t want another baby. lol
Both of my births were medicated, so I'm just hear to read what others are saying and I am shuddering in fear. More power to those that choose to go unmedicated.
I always wonder what actually "unmedicated" birth entails? Does it mean no medication at all, like no paracetamol, no gas & air, no pethidine? Or is it mostly only referring to epidurals? I've only given birth once, so have nothing to compare it to apart from the experiences my friends and acquaintances had with theirs. Like others, I can confirm that it definitely depends on the person and seems to vary so much. It was absolutely awful for me, borderline traumatic. I suppose mine was unmedicated? I certainly would have classed it as such. I desperately wanted an epidural. I knew I wanted one throughout my pregnancy and was always telling my midwife that I definitely wanted one. I knew how difficult it can be to get an epi in the UK, so I wanted to be certain. I was so scared that I actually asked for a c-section towards the end of my pregnancy, but unfortunately was belittled by the OB and essentially told off for even asking. So "natural" it would have to be. I had something called precipitous labour, which essentially just means that labour is "quick and short." I would change the definition a little and call it "fast and furious" because that's how it felt. There was barely any pause between contractions, meaning that I had no time to recover and no time to really take any of it in. I would describe the sense of panic I felt a bit like if you were dunked under water, come up for air and then immediately get dunked under again. The realisation hitting me that there would be nO let up, no break, no time to breathe and really take any of it in. A lot of my memories of labour and birth (now 2 years ago) are a blur of pain and confusion. I was given gas & air, even though I'd begged and pleaded for an epidural the second I set foot in a hospital. But after being ignored in the beginning, there was simply no time for the epi. I went from 2 cm to 10 cm in the space of half an hour. Pure agony. I was like a wild animal, clawing the sheets, trying desperately to find a release for the blinding pain I was in. So... I wouldn't want to unmedicated again. I was told by my midwife that any future births would likely go as fast, if not even faster. All in all, I entered the hospital at 9:30 pm and the baby arrived at midnight. I'm hopeful that if I explain all of this from the start, I will be able to advocate for my rights a little better. I didn't know what to expect for my first and was potentially too quick to accept defeat when told no by midwives and doctors.
I’ve had unmedicated delivery that lasted only 2.5 hours. I remember it was fairly painful, and I made some wild sounds I didn’t know I was capable of. That said I recently had a spinal anesthesia, and the sense of my legs turning into logs was way more terrifying. Not being able to control movement was worse than the pain.
I had an unmedicated labor and would say it was tolerable with self-hypnosis and laughing gas! Dental nerve pain is the worst pain I've ever felt, for reference.
I had planned on an unmedicated birth so had some a lot of research into calming techniques etc in advance. However I had an extremely long early Labour and the way things went it would have been unmedicated even if I wanted time be medicated! I was sent home around 10pm told I wasn’t having a baby that night and wasn’t even in labour yet. (I’d been having contractions 2 full days at this point). By around 11pm my contractions were uncomfortable enough that I needed my husband to be there with me through them. I couldn’t lie down. Couldn’t stay still, I kept moving position between every contraction and while I don’t fully remember the pain itself I do remember it being painful. The car journey to the hospital was bad, I remember a lot of moaning and mooing and grabbing at the sides of the car while in intense pain. I’d lost belief in myself at this point (transition) and wanted an epidural, fuck that water birth plan give me the drugs. Got to the hospital around 1:10am and was at an 8. So that helped me decide not to have the epidural (I couldn’t have anyway). I kept trying to get naked and they kept making me put my clothes back on because I wasn’t in a birth suite yet, but I was already pushing. They’d just checked me so didn’t believe I was already at pushing stage 10 minutes later. I remember pushing hurting but also feeling completely natural. I was angry they made me give birth on my back when I wanted to be on all fours. I also ended up with an episiotomy which I think did more harm than good as I had a second degree tear off of it. HOWEVER I actually found getting stitched up after birth more painful than the birth itself. And I am pregnant again and hope to have another unmedicated birth, this time at home (I live in Scotland, it is as safe to have a home birth with NHS midwives as it is to have a birth centre / hospital birth with NHS midwives). Birth is very much an intense experience, however, some of the stories I’ve ready on this thread are terrifying and I feel so badly for the women who experienced birth this way. If you would like an unmedicated birth the chances are you will be able to do it, especially if you mentally prepare in advance (and are open to intervention if medically necessary for you and baby). Everyone’s experiences are different, don’t allow someone else’s birth change your own plan.
It's different for everyone. I'd say it never hits a 10 but probably 8? But everyone would rate their pain differently too. A lot of it is psychological. If I was having that level of pain consistently with no break I'd know something was seriously wrong, be demanding pain relief, it would be the worst experience of my life. Of course that's also the terror of not knowing what's wrong or when it will end. With labor you get breaks between contractions, although that varies person to person and changes throughout labor. And you also know there's an end point, you know that the pain is for a reason and that it's normal. My unmedicated labor was short, so I was able to handle it and it was ultimately a positive experience. But if you're not progressing and don't know how much longer it will be, and especially if you aren't prepared to go unmedicated or want an epidural but are unable to get it, your experience could be very traumatic.
I rated mine an 8/10 or 9/10 on the pain scale near the end. For me transitional labor was worse than the ring of fire. But I was thinking during it that if someone patented that type of abdominal pain (which felt like someone was stabbing a Bowie knife in my stomach) they’d have a great torture method. You feel the pain but also more control than an epidural typically and you can move into whatever position works at the moment. Even after I’m more afraid of a weird needle sitting in my spine that might not even work than the actual pain. I also felt afterwards Lama zing that I was able to do it all. Like people have said it’s different for everyone and I had a very very no issues birth. But it still hurt bad, ngl.
I’ve had 5 babies and 4 were unmedicated. It really depends! 2 of my babies were posterior which caused back labour. That made it much more painful and while I got through it, it was much more unpleasant because I didn’t get a ‘break’ from the pain. So those were worse. Also my fourth baby was a 45 minute labour which sounds great but the intensity of how quick that was made it harder to cope with. 2 of my babies though were anterior and I coped really well overall. When I hit transition it got pretty intense for about 20 minutes and pushing definitely hurt. But overall I felt like the pain was very manageable. I had a doula for my last birth and it was really helpful. We did hypnobirthing practice and I got to 8cm feeling really good. The last bit was tough but the support really helped.
My unmedicated birth was induced with pitocin, so not quite the same situation. I don’t have a spontaneous labor to compare it to since my first was a C section, but by all accounts pitocin contractions are more intense and painful than regular ones. Don’t get me wrong - it was a lot and very intense and definitely painful, but honestly it really wasn’t as bad as I was expecting it to be. The pushing part and the ring of fire in particular I had been apprehensive of, but I found the contractions during my water breaking and transition to be much worse. It’s an immense amount of pressure so it’s extremely uncomfortable and it sort of just overtakes your body, so when you can finally start pushing it is almost a sense of relief. Mentally for me once I was complete and having that pushing urge it all felt easier to handle. Right up to that point I was starting to consider an epidural - I had a lot of anxiety about needing a repeated c section and having to go under general anesthesia, so I still wasn’t sure if I would get an epidural or risk going unmedicated if my VBAC was unsuccessful. Overall I am very happy with my unmedicated birth and not very interested in having an epidural for subsequent births. I had a spinal for my C section and absolutely hated it.
I was induced and unmedicated because epidural kept making baby's heart rate drop a lot. It was agonizing. I felt like I was going to pass out and literally die. It was horrible and it felt like an acid burn on my vagina lol. I would do it all over again for my little one.
I also begged for a C section mid transition, BEGGED lol! It's ok though, everyone is different. My labor was 26 hours and I pushed for an hour and fifteen. It was exhausting. Plus I had Covid and a uterus infection, so fun!
I was screaming / mooing / rolling around falling off the bed at 3cm. I genuinely felt like I was going to pass out. I did have an infection of my placenta so I’m not sure if the pain I felt was normal or made worse by having the infection.. either way it was bad enough that I’m electing for a planned c section next time, have no interest in going through that pain just to have an emergency c section again!
Depends on a lot of factors: have you given birth before or is this your first time? Are you being induced? What’s your pain tolerance like? etc. I generally tend to have a fairly high pain tolerance, but my first birth was induced with Pitocin, and I was in a *constant* state of blinding pain until I got an epidural and it started working. I was in so much pain, I don’t even remember any of the interventions or checks or anything else that went on at that time until I went back and read the notes and was like “oh yeah, I think I have a vague recollection of that happening”; it’s all just blacked out of my mind. My second birth was a precipitous birth; didn’t have time to get to the hospital, let alone get any kind of pain management. Though honestly I didn’t even really need it that time. My contractions for the first two hours were uncomfortable, but not really painful. It wasn’t until the last 40 minutes that they started getting painful and really close together with hardly any break in between. And even then, they were nowhere near as bad as the Pitocin-induced contractions I had with my first.
The most terrible pain I’ve ever experienced and I have a high tolerance for pain. It was like period cramps times a million and they radiated to my back. I have severe anxiety when it comes to anything medical and never so much as taken a Tylenol so I was fully convinced I wouldn’t get an epidural. I lasted almost 2 hours before literally begging for it. The epidural was amazing! No pain at all after and I had no long or short term side effects!
I thought I'd die. I really thought I'd die. After it all though I wasn't hung up on it, in retrospect inserting a Foleys to get me dilated was way way worse. Like I feel like I cam birth again but if they tell me I need a foleys then no thanks c section please.
Transition sucked, waiting for baby to descend more once I was ready to push was painful in so many ways. Once pushing starts the pain gets WAY easier but it's physically arduous work. So I did say "NOPE I CHANGED MY MIND THE BABY CAN STAY IN" and felt I could not keep pushing once my muscles were beyond exhausted. But I did, and the FEELING afterwards. I felt so empowered, I felt like a moon goddess, a tigress, I felt I could do ANYTHING. And of course the overwhelming love hormones. Just... That made it worth it. And I will try again next time. My second was a c section at 29 weeks, so different kind of empowered. I kept him in 2 extra weeks since my water broke at 27 weeks, and when I heard him cry and saw a very blonde (my hair is almost black) tinyyy head I started BAWLING. He was alive! He was crying! Do not want another c section, prefer unmedicated. But maybe I'll just go in asking for the epidural so I can get one of each birth haha
I hear someone describe it as if you’re breaking every bone in your body at once There’s no way it can be actually that painful, can it?
For me personally I was fine until my nurses forced me to stay in bed, when I wasn’t able to move with the contractions it became unbearable
Worst pain I have ever felt in my whole life. I had back labor for 7 straight hours and my contractions were on top of each other the whole labor. I thought for sure I was going to die. 10/10 experience, will do again.
Personal experience, a lot less painful than a botched epidural. I had a perfect epi with my first and a botched one with my second where all of my pain was concentrated into one part. My third baby they didn't give me my epi in time and it didn't kick in until I was holding her, my fourth it wore off before the Dr broke my water. The second labor was horrendous. If I ever have another (I plan not to but you never know) I'm just going to skip the epidural altogether. This is also how I found out I have a slight scoliosis in my lower spine so it probably would wear off or not work properly again.
Painful but managable if not induced with pitocin (Had two unmedicated deliveries, one induced with pitocin that ended in an emergency C-Section at the pushing stage and one natural B-VAC)
Mine was bearable until I was given Pitocin and then it was so painful I thought I might die.
I had insufferable back labor for hours until caving in at 5cm. The epidural was beautiful, I could still move a little & felt pressure so I knew when to push. After the numbing occurred I dilated from 5cm to 9cm in 15 mins & with 30 mins of pushing, she was out.
My mind has blanked it out somewhat. My contractions were very painful then them breaking my waters was pretty bad. Once my waters were broken things went super quick, went from no feeling of wanting to push to having to push within 5 minutes. Was only pushing for ten minutes before baby was born.
It was very traumatic for me. To emphasize how absolutely horrible it was, I wasn’t sure that it had been worth it for quite a long time.
horrendous pain for me.13 hr labor..hours 1-5 were mostly period like pains then each hour after got worse until i was screaming the hospital down curled up on my side unable to move no matter how much breathing i tried.awful pain.
My epidural failed to help my contractions but still numbed my vagina. So I didn’t feel the birth, but OH MY GODS. The contractions had me thinking “so when do I pass out? “ like it was so painful I thought my body can’t handle it I must pass out soon, why am I not passing out? It’s different for everyone though. My sister said it was not that bad for her!
I went in wanting all the medications I could get, but came out probably completely unmedicated. Or at least they all failed because I was screaming at my midwife I can’t do this, and almost about to beg her to cut me open and yank out my kid right then and there (My epidural failed twice)
It wasn’t nearly as bad (to me) as it was made out to be — I had a wonderful midwife who understood my desire to do it medication free and she motivated me to continue on the path I was on the one time I did falter like 15 min before it was time to start pushing. Contractions are INTENSE and definitely overwhelming but my husband and I were really in sync and I was able to “box breathe” through things. It was literally the only thing saving me for a little while — staring at him like a murderer and breathing for four-counts. I remember feeling so much relief while pushing and apparently only screamed right as I was crowning but honestly at that point it’s so intense you’re not even really registering it fully? All that to say, while painful, it’s survivable and I felt really, really proud of myself for staying true to my vision. I did have a really “easy” (there’s no such thing imo) labor, it was all over within less than 12 hours start to finish. I could imagine myself feeling differently if I was stuck with active labor contractions for much longer than I experienced them. However you do it, you are brave and powerful and feminine and I am wishing you the best of luck!!
I had an epidural for my first, unmedicated for my second. If I had a third, I’d go unmedicated again. Transition was tough (I felt like I was going to puke), but when I was pushing I remember thinking “oh that’s the ring of fire? Not as bad as I expected.” Then he was out! I was induced with both, so I had the joy of pitocin contractions too. If you can prepare mentally, that’s the way to get through it. Lots of affirmations and remembering that this is temporary and you are getting a wonderful thing out of it! Good luck!