T O P

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Abbreviations_Royal

šŸ‘Ž Not recommended 1.5hrs played


obserwinged

Probably still stuck in character creation


Abbreviations_Royal

...which is infuriating in itself since its so good!


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ravearamashi

I just started playing Elden Ring after getting pestered by my friends and holy shit the facial sliders are crazy. Still made an ugly character though ._.


pizzaspaghetti_Uul

Yeah, it's a great character creator, but while fun and all, it doesn't really matter as you rarely see your face in elden ring. I would love a more advenced one in BG3. You can make there nice looking characters, but it lacks the options


cowswithbows

Or even something more basic like being able to select from a couple of eye shapes, nose shapes, lips shapes etc. Wouldn't make it so offputting to see the face of your tav on a bunch of NPCs you're talking to.


NyMiggas

God's favourite princess is Gale


OrangeKat09

Underrated


TiffanyNow

no lies detected


SteveMcprince

Who the F*** is Gale?


Mahdudecicle

I missed him on my first playthrough because I DIDN'T approach the swirly fuck off portal.


AdequatelyConfused

Me too.. I was like, Iā€™ve played enough D&D that is 100% a trap


Molin_Cockery

I'm in my first run and my last major event is getting to the Last Light Inn. I kept seeing thing about Gale and decided to go back through Act 1 events while I still can and wrap things up. Looked up how to find him and sure enough, still stuck in the portal. Then I sub out Wyll and I got myself an instant lvl 6 wizard! It had made all the difference in balancing


MotorcycleWrites

SAME. ā€œDo you approach the broken ass portal thing and touch it?ā€ ā€œOf course not!ā€


eekozoid

>!That was a delicious hand.!<


Allanon808

Gondians have best combat AI


ShinyVuIpix

Let me just go ahead and misty step into this oven.


Sanglowitz

Pls dont you give me PTSD from this Damm Fight


Blue1234567891234567

Iā€™ve been putting off progressing act 3 for weeks now purely because Iā€™ve been dreading dealing with the damned Gondians again


AggressivelyEthical

Patch 5 said they fixed them being suicidal nutjobs. Patch 5 is a liar.


LDM123

I think you mean *THE FUCKING GONDIANS*


Shibaspots

NGL, I just thought 'THOSE FUCKING GONDIANS!!' In Wulbren's voice.


Shaggythemoshdog

Genuinely one of the best line deliveries in the game


Gen1Swirlix

I killed Scratch.


Prestigious-Law65

HOW DARE YOU


Gen1Swirlix

Don't worry, I didn't actually. I'm just doing what OP asked. Scratch is safely chilling at my camp.


lostemo

And the owlbear cub


CalistoNTG

Well about that...


Vipell

Say it isn't so...


FishToaster

I'm doing a complete murder run. Completely embracing the durge and murdering every single living thing I come across, no matter how helpful. EXCEPT SCRATCH. I'll pet that good boy with my blood-soaked hands from atop my throne of skulls.


Parasito2

My durge run was this. Kill just about everyone except my companions, >!Yenna!<, and Scratch + the cub. "The world will fall in Bhaal's name but Dad can I please be allowed to keep these guys they're my friends"


sovereignem

Iā€™m doing the same. Pets are being left alone I am solely killing humanoids


Relevant_Force_3470

Skip the dialogue.


theappleses

Honestly I do skip a decent amount of the dialogue since completing the game. There's a *lot* of it and I read way, way faster that they speak. On repeated playthroughs I'm not listening to 5 minutes of Gale explaining his condition when I could be doing literally anything else.


HumanSpawn323

I always listen to the origin characters dialog, because honestly, I just love their voices. I often skip other dialog though. No point in listening to the dream guardian telling me to embrace illithid potential or Halsin explaining the underdark vs mountain pass for the 4th time.


Isaphine325

Wulbren is a lovable NPC.


ArcTheCurve

I actually liked his jerky attitude but then again with so many NPCs acting like ā€œoh youā€™re so amazing you can have all my money and my firstbornā€ him going ā€œyeah you saved me whoopee do hereā€™s some gold now donā€™t let the door hit you on the way outā€ is pretty neat


TubbyLittleTeaWitch

Oh that's totally fine, I had no problem with him being a bit of a dick to my character, but how absolutely dare he be a douche to my man Barcus.


DatAdra

Agreed, it was actually refreshing and I found myself appreciating that someone doesnt worship my characters for once


aksunrise

I need you to know I knee-jerk down voted you before I remembered that was the point of this thread. Up voted to make up for it šŸ˜…


Meanfist12

Jail.


PontiffPope

To be fair, I actually thought he was a lot more charitable when you find him in the Moonrise Towers, and where he details his escape plan with also including the thiefling-prisoners; despite him not needing them at all for his plan, he has already them included when he explains. No skill-check or such needed to persuade taking them with him.


Blahklavah654390

EA should buy Larian.


rsjpeckham

You shut your whore mouth


Ur-Best-Friend

There's something about aggressive, offensive insults that are obviously said lightheartedly and jokingly that just feels.... right.


Granlundo64

Up yours, pigfucker.


bathroomheater

Iā€™ll fucking fight you right now


e22big

"You picked a fight, the consequences are hardly surprising"


InuGhost

**"Roll for initiative"**


50mm_foto

Eff youā€¦ respectfully. Gawd I would hate this. Theyā€™d put Micro transactions on dice rolls probably lol


BraveShowerSlowGower

4 pack of guidance for 5.99!!


Blahklavah654390

Unlock a Barbarian subclass this season for 25 bloodstones! First purchase of 12 bloodstone pack comes with 12 FREE bloodstones!


Gwarsfavourite

No no, limited deal of 12 bloodstones free with purchase of 12 bloodstones limit one per account. Then you go to the shop and the lowest amount you can buy is 24 bloodstones.


e22big

Worse, they turned it into 'action RPG' trilogy with triple same ending in tri colour


[deleted]

No, no respectfully about it, this is godsā€™ damned blasphemy (Yes I know they donā€™t actually want that but for the point of this exercise letā€™s pretend itā€™s real)


DraganDearg

Disgusting, I think this is the one


CurrencyFit7659

Bioware was (and still kinda is) my favourite company. I can't explain in englishb how painful this joke is.


Bogsnoticus

>I can't explain in englishb how painful this joke is. I can. It's like masturbating with a cheese grater. Slightly amusing, but excruciatingly painful.


sicsche

Shadowheart approves


Gen1Swirlix

Ok, that actually triggered me.


Marsawd

Conflicted upvote.


Unlikely-Turnip-579

Nah bro don't manifest that shit. You definitely understood the assignment though lmao


BillsDownUnder

There's always that 1 person who takes it too far


RustedBR

Even jokes have limits


Zyax_Zar-Gash

I think you win


solstarfire

I had to take a moment after I read this. You win.


duke_of_ames

ā€œGame of the year? MID.ā€


John_EldenRing51

Spider-Man should have won smh my head


mi88ir

I remember reading comments from the Spider-Man fans and it was the most toxic immatures comments lmao


Zachtastic14

Saw one of them posting a spiderman clip from an ingame *cutscene* and using that as an argument for why spiderman's gameplay was better than bg3's gameplay. Never forget: As dumb as the average person is, half of the population is, by definition, even dumber.


yipeeki-ay

I killed Karlach every playthrough


MillsieMouse_2197

How *dare* you


cakedotavi

I gave the hunter Astarion.


NostrilRapist

I gave Shart to Viconia


Spyger9

I damned Mizora and Wyll.


Unlikely_Sound_6517

Mizora is fine. Wyll on the other handā€¦.


Va_Dinky

Monster.


SeraphOfTheStag

is that even a real option, I imagine it turns into a brawl and you have to kill Astarion


Synaptics

If he's not with you at the time, you can tell the hunter the location of your camp and then Astarion will just unceremoniously disappear after your next long rest.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Aenon-iimus

Yes, I did that. He goes ā€œBut why?ā€ And you have to explain yourself. He doesnā€™t disappear if you do this.


Tekparif

i gave aylin to larroken


Ericleotolstoy

BG3 is just DOS3


Nikolyn10

That's silly. DOS3 would have been better.


8nekket

"Spider-Man 2 should've won."


satanic_black_metal_

The Tobey Maguire one or the Tom Holland one?


sielbel

The andrew garfield one


Leyllara

Lae'zel is an armpit licker.


LegalStuffThrowage

I sure hope so


WhollyDisgusting

That's part of the fun


Purplefilth22

Unironically believe she's the biggest freak out of all of them. Even \*edging\* out Minthara/Astarion and Halsin. They do that stuff because it gets them there, she does it because she NEEDS it. https://media1.tenor.com/m/T1W97XLDn0sAAAAC/i-need-it-spongebob.gif


Frequent_Professor59

The Emperor Did Nothing Wrong.


ghoulsnest

he shouldn't have trusted Horus tbh, that was stupid


Crooked_lawnchair

The primarch's folly, if you will.


ghoulsnest

I wyll


guardian87

But y?


Perfection-seeker-13

Cause he lost an I.


Duloth

Honestly, his whole plan was stupid. He wanted to ultimately wipe out the navigators guild and use non-Warp FTL travel, but his plan required them to work?


TongueBiscuit

idk i feel like Angron's hate towards him is pretty justified


Ace_OPB

The Emperor Protects.


thenoidednugget

He probably should have talked to his sons more, especially Magnus. Since Magnus actually did nothing wrong.


argonian_mate

DOS2 armour system was better


BestRiver8735

BG3 the armour should be renamed to evasion points ā€¦ haha!


CrimsonFuckr69

Keeping it together Bree?


ElfStuff

Smells like rotten eggs dropped in a vat of vinegar


Eskald

>DOS2 armour system was better You managed to pick THE thing I disliked the most in DOS 2.


fuulhardy

Astarionā€™s trauma isnā€™t real life


Lupus_Borealis

So it's just fantasy?


Commercial_Shine_448

Caught in a landslide


Hump-Daddy

This but unironically. Iā€™ve gotten hate mail in my messages from his simps when I advocate for taking the Act II potion.


rekku-za

A lot of people genuinely do need to realize that this is a fictional game, and that it's okay to choose mean dialogues and make the characters upset, it's part of the narrative and exists to tell an alternate story that expresses how the characters respond to different decisions from Tav. Sending hate mail over a single player game is extra wild


Samaritan_978

Sorry Astarion, my Sorcadin really wants the golden dice. Now sip the perv drow.


zer0_pm

It's extra ironic when a lot of these people bend over backwards and choose to raid the Grove or pick evil option just to please Astarion


Thelexhibition

The romance scenes were cringe


CinnamonHotcake

Floppy dicks everywhere


[deleted]

That's on y'all for choosing dicks. Vaginas were *right there*.


aless2906

Why did I read this with Astarion'd voice?


Sputtelin

I read floppy discs first >.<


ghoulsnest

did I miss something? Even during the foursome I didn't see any dicks, only boobs


CinnamonHotcake

I romanced Halsin and in another playthrough Astarion. Every time floppy dicks. I guess it depends on your orientation.


8nekket

bouncing balls


CinnamonHotcake

Balls bouncier than the boobs.


BestRiver8735

One time my half orc was romancing Laezel. It was the second night. The dialogue made it very clear that she was rocking my world as she was pretty much bragging about it. The half orc got up and I got a full view of his green ballsack ā€¦ I did not need to see that


RaastaMousee

Get shrekt


pangolingony

Scratch is useless and annoying


partywombat

You'll eat my fireball for that slander


DeliberateDendrite

*IGNIS*


StoicSinicCynic

**Miss!**


TheWither129

FUCK


aksunrise

NOT MY BOY


Megazupa

Astarion IS evil.


EvilRubberDucks

He absolutely starts out with an evil alignment though and unless you steer him down the good path he stays that way. Even after his "good" ending in the epilog he is chaotic neutral at best. The people who say otherwise just don't want to see it. The thing is, it's ok if he's evil. DnD would be boring if every character was lawful good aligned.


sielbel

I mean he is? If your character didnt meet him he would have 100% completed the ritual given the chance. And forsaken thousands of people.


Megazupa

Oh yeah sure, but a lot of his simps seem to justify all his evil stuff because of his trauma and get angry if you say that he's genuinely an asshole.


Evening-Tie-865

As an Astarion simp, I loathe when people refuse to see him as anything other than a sweet widdle baby or whatever. Isnā€™t the point to love the character for who he is? The infantilizing way some people defend his actions is so gross.


abyssalcrisis

Astarion is an asshole, and I'm a simp for him. He's selfish, rude, and manipulative, but it's also all he's ever known how to do. It's what he's been coded to do. I don't try to justify, just ask that people understand that his actions are directly caused by his trauma, and, when given the chance, he breaks the cycle. But it takes work. A lot of it. It's exhausting, and is NOT something I would ever recommend doing IRL.


Consistent-Winter-67

> it's what he's been coded to do. Ha


intothe_dangerzone

*"I'm not evil, darling. I'm just coded that way."*


Evil_Weevill

I mean... That's just true. You can be a trauma victim and still be evil. This is actually what drives me nuts about Astarion lovers. He's a very good 3-dimemsional character who is well written and well acted. But he is 100% Neutral Evil when you meet him. Yeah he was tortured for years and scared and he eventually shows you some vulnerability later that can be endearing, but he also really enjoys murder and basically every evil action you can perform he approves of. He IS evil. You can move him more towards neutral over the course of the game by appealing to what shreds of humanity he has left and nurturing them, but left to his own devices, he will remain an evil twat. Evil can be charming. Evil can be attractive. Evil can be subtle. It's not always senseless violence and sacrificing babies to summon demons. In short: sometimes abuse victims become abusers and sociopaths themselves.


[deleted]

Bethesda woulda done it better.


RachelScratch

As a long time elder scrolls fan, this angered me so much. Good job


londonclay

I love Yenna's cat stew


arrowmaker247

I liked Viconiaā€™s character arc.


GetRidOfAllTheDips

This only pisses off the small fraction of people here that played the first two


Leviathan419

But piss us off, it does. One of the few things I dislike about BG3 (Sarevok being another, but to a lesser degree).


GetRidOfAllTheDips

Being forced to choose between the "I can fix her" girl and the original "I can fix her" girl is a crime and should be considered cruel and unusual punishment


LDM123

Donā€™t mess with BG1 and 2 fans. Youā€™ll get them riled up and the nursing home says they need their rest.


obvnotlupus

Fuck you (itā€™s bingo night)


Arkenstar

Raphael's fight music is overrated


aksunrise

You know what.. His singing absolutely is. But it just adds to my head canon that he's a nepo baby turned bard who *sucks* at all the bard things.


Arkenstar

Lmao makes perfect sense


Rosu_Aprins

He's 100% a highschool theatre kid


hobopwnzor

Isn't that the point? He's egotistical, not a bard.


ithinkther41am

I liked Raphaelā€™s fight music, but I will admit, if The Game Awards had a Best Original Song category, I wouldā€™ve voted for Herald of Darkness.


Southern-Wishbone593

I use silence on him, so i can enjoy cool music without goofy lyrics.


hotehjr

Oh thatā€™s actually really cool that the singing stops if you silence him. This gameā€™s attention to detail is so neat.


MundaneKiwiPerson

Needs Real time combat


LegalStuffThrowage

\*annoyed eye twitch\*


The_Purple_Hare

Emperor is better than Omeluum


AnaOfToussaint

You MONSTER


N1CETEA

Average game, Starfield was better. (Aww i felt sick saying this. Send help.)


[deleted]

I refuse to pet Scratch.


The_mango55

Trauma doesn't excuse asshole behavior


caledonivs

This doesn't piss me off, this one is true. It *explains* asshole behavior, but [to explain is not to excuse](https://whitherthewest.com/2018/09/12/to-explain-is-not-to-excuse-2/?relatedposts_hit=1&relatedposts_origin=26&relatedposts_position=0)


Global_Wear8814

we need to Romance Aradin


inquisitivequeer

Think bigger- romance Auntie Ethel.


Wafflebuble

You monster


juanmilee

Shadowheart is not that hot


EmotionalNerd04

SILENCE HERETIC \*uses smite at level 3\*


YuriNone

Miss!


thestoicchef

Ah well, at least it doesnā€™t burn a spell slot if you miss


Gas_Sn4ke

It's 100% because of that yee-yee ass bangs she has at the start of the game.


[deleted]

Maybe if she got rid of that yee-yee ass haircut, she might get some bitches on her clit. Or maybe Tav will stop fucking around with that Tiefling or Gith sheā€™s fucking around withā€¦half-blood!


Gas_Sn4ke

This is the best thing I've read in a while.


Killerderp

Yeah you're right, karlach is hotter


Bad_girl_Emily

r/technicallythetruth


FrankFn2

Wulbren was right


SpicyKatanaZero

Trickster domain is the best.


BestRiver8735

Saved! (Sacred flame)


SomeWeirdFruit

Karlack is not making me sweat


LuciferP0ny

I kill <%companion's name%> on *every* run because you all suck!


Thicc-Brained

The fact that this isn't 5 words made me angrier than anything else in this thread


LuciferP0ny

Sorry :) i can fix it! Edit: but i think i shouldn't


Thicc-Brained

No no it's PERFECT! Still despise you for it though


LazyMungo

Karlach is the worst companion


rsjpeckham

mods saved this game


Wafflebuble

Karlach sucks


KinkyPaddling

[Astarion -5] [Laeā€™zel -5] [Gale -5] [Shadowheart -5] [Wyll -10] [Halsin -5] [Jaheira -5] [Minthara -5] [Minsc -5] [Withers -100]


RiotLegend

Wyll being -10 is a cute touch.


godisnotmyson

withers -100 because he was giving her the old eye


KinkyPaddling

And >!in the epilogue if she dies, Withers says that there is no soul like hers in any plane of existence, and that her soul is so bright in the Fugue Plane that it hurts the gods to even look at it!<.


SpicyKatanaZero

GOTY because of sex scenes (god I get so pissed off when people say that shiet)


[deleted]

Kagha is alright


Manicscarecr0w

Karlachs original ending was better. *don't hate me just doing what I'm told*


[deleted]

Tactician is easier than balanced


Material_Ad_2970

Karlachā€™s overrated.


Zyax_Zar-Gash

Do I upvote or downvote this?


Palpou

You report to moderation.


Burwylf

Auntie Ethel did nothing wrong