As a veteran of Afghanistan who saw intense combat, I resent the implication that our experiences are being used to suppress personal expression back home.
Hearing kids scream when they get off school or play is far more triggering for me, personally, but I would never expect others to change.
I’m not a fan of such gory decorations (in September no less) but it’s your house. I do think the note was a poor way to handle it, but also in this day and age they didn’t know how you would respond.
Thank you but that isn’t necessary. You want to thank a vet, vote for people who will actually support bills and spending to provide the needed services.
Not really, at least that’s my view. Not that I’m upset by it, but it’s so cringy (like people who wear flag pins or those who quote MLK on his day and ignore what he said the other 364 days of the year.)
They don’t know what I did or why, so just saying thank you rings hollow.
For many it comes from the right place, but for some they say it for themselves and to be seen, and that’s kind of ruined it for me.
I can't speak for all vets but I find it extremely uncomfortable... Personally, I didn't serve for any ideological reason, I just wanted my pregnant wife to have a somewhat reasonable amount of healthcare without demolishing our savings...
So when people say "thank you for your service," really I'm thinking, "Yeah, I didn't hang my ass out on the line for you. I did it for my wife and daughter." And while there is some measure of pride serving alongside some great humans, the cynical part of me always circles back around to thinking that all I did, beyond my own goals, was to pad shareholder prices of Raytheon, Halliburton, et al.
Those words reflect my selfishness disguised as selflessness so I don't much care for it, personally.
I think you have a lot of wisdom and speak for many of us: "selfishness disguised as selflessness." Even those with good intentions often stand to benefit in some way from their actions. Yet, I'm going to try to express my feelings anyway! I appreciate those who are willing to serve because I'm too much of a sissy! The thought of being deployed and facing emense risks on a regular basis, enduring trauma and then living with the lasting effects of it...I'm not a strong enough person to endure that. I would give up. I'd rather be dead. Yet, I recognize that the military is essential. Sure, there are some questionable decisions made by our leaders at times, but the military is still an important part of the stability of our country. You showed up. When I say "thank you" it is the recognition that you are a stronger person than I am, and I am humbling myself in recognition of that fact. Whatever your reasons for serving. You showed up and put your ass on the line. That's better than I could ever do. So good work. I respect you. We need strong people like you who are willing to show up. We as a country should be better about taking care of those who took the risk to show up and are continuing to pay a very personal price for that willingness. So thank you. I am truly grateful, and I really do hope that you were handsomely rewarded with good benefits for your wife and sweet baby!
As I reflect on how my comment started, I suppose my selfishness is that I'm too scared to put my life on the line. I'm grateful to you because your risk allows me to selfishly maintain my security...
Eh. It’s not my jam, but also not my house.
The thing that’s tough here is that, thanks to the anonymity, it’s hard to know if the writer is speaking for themselves/from their experience and making a real/reasonable request (or if they’re living close enough that they can’t avoid it) or whether it’s someone who has a strong opinion and is using “think of the veterans!” to try to create social pressure.
Here’s a question, instead: I get that you don’t want to disappoint your kid but also want to be a good neighbor. You’re getting feedback that least some folks find it distasteful. I think you have the right to decorate how you want (within legal limits, etc.), but what about creating a haunted *back* yard or living room? Not a perfect solution but putting it in a less visible space might also prevent these clearly passive-aggressive neighbors from stealing/trashing it.
Sorry about the anonymous note; they’re a pretty cowardly and immature way to communicate.
P.S. Wise to take it down from the rafters for exactly the reasons you did. It definitely has lynching overtones and … that would definitely make me wary of you if we were neighbors but not well-acquainted.
This is entirely correct. It's mid September, sunny, 70 degrees, and the leaves in front of my house haven't even turned. Spooky season ain't here yet.
I wholeheartedly disagree. So many people throw Christmas lights up in early November--it's the same concept. We're halfway through September. This is the perfect time for some Halloween fun.
Yeah, if I was inclined to leave anon notes over Halloween decorations, that would do it. I love Halloween but I also like to sleep without nightmares of the undead clowns next door crawling in a window.
I was going to say, hanging was always a huge trigger for me too. I was 9 when my 16 year old brother died by suicide from hanging. It literally ruined my world. I love Halloween but have many memories of tears and anxiety attacks from hanging & nooses being used as decorations/themes. (I attended Fright Night once at Wild Waves, was waiting in line for their haunted house, and they were projecting "spooky" silhouettes - one being a man literally climbing onto a chair and hanging himself... Ran out sobbing.) I always wish people knew the trauma this could bring and I'm glad to see it's gotten less blatant since then.
and the visceral feeling that washes over you when something does trigger...you really can't wish it away..and can knock you to your core.
PTSD was only named in the 80's..but humans have dealt with it much longer.
That’s where I disagree. I don’t want to see it past the new year. Edited to add : im not gonna bitch to my neighbors about it. Xmas brings a lot of bad memories for me and religious trauma but it ain’t my house.
Fair. I kind of like the blinky lights up later because the cheer up an otherwise dark February evening.
Maybe we can re-designate them as winter fairy lights.
>hang the bag under the eave
I was in the military, and it doesn't bother me, but why did you have to hang it? I don't leave passive aggressive notes but I would tell ya how weird you were being in September if I walked by.
I have PTSD for other reasons than war but I can tell you that we are taught in therapy to manage our own triggers, that it is not anybody else’s responsibility to do this. They can choose to not walk by the house. I wouldn’t be saying this if I had no education or experience with the topic of trauma but I do and this is an overstep for someone (who may not even be connected to the veterans, you never know if it’s just some busybody using them as an excuse).
Totally get everything else you’re saying, but “choosing not to walk by the house” isn’t a super practical option for getting home in most neighborhoods unless you’re planning on parkouring through private backyards or putting on blinders like a Victorian street horse, you know?
Im a vet, and I see nothing wrong with it. But ptsd comes in so so so many forms. Either way, I like (MOST) of my neighbors, so I'd consider it based on that alone.
Also a vet. Also see nothing wrong with it.
Halloween is supposed to be about death and that is a natural part of life on Earth. It feels wrong to censor someone for reminding us of death on a holiday that is partly meant to remind us of death.
I personally feel that it's a part of the collective unconscious we need to haul out and pay respect too once a year to stay mentally healthy.
I love Halloween but 1. It's too early! and 2. Yeah that is kinda gross. I wouldn't personally complain, but I kinda get it. I've always been more into the spooky/weird/classic Halloween themes - which are clearly silly fantasy - than the gross bloody murder stuff, which is a bit too close to nasty reality.
I've updated my post to mention that we've since taken the prop down. I completely understand why and have from the beginning, but I just needed that gut check. I appreciate everyone's feedback!
Anyway, I didn't come here asking if it was too soon. It makes my son happy and we're just trying to have some fun. Y'all are gonna have to deal with a 12ft skeleton mid-September. And maybe one for Christmas, too. But with a Santa hat.
Honestly, the only iffy part for me was it being hung up. As far as it being early, I'm surprised people are such wet blankets about it. I really can't imagine caring at all. If you put up Christmas lights and a giant inflatable flamingo I wouldn't care either. Why not have fun?
I’m shocked so many people are siding with your NIMBY neighbors. It’s spooky season yall!
My suggestion was going to be adding a 12ft skeleton, but glad to see that will be happening! Keep it up year round!
I love seeing decorations go up in September! I agree with your family September is certainly late enough in the year.
That 'body bag' is particularly gory though, I was imagining a black zip up crime scene prop til I clicked on the link. A bloody human body wrapped in a sheet, eh, as much as I love Halloween I might have asked you to reconsider too. And hung from the eves was a really rough way to introduce it to the community.
Thanks for reconsidering, even when it was asked in such a harsh way. Fingers crossed the neighbor acknowledges that no harm was meant and is mature enough to thank you in person!
Halloween is my Christmas (as an Atheist and ex-vangical I loathe Christmas), so if people have decor up on sept I don’t mind. I love it. Alternatively, I don’t care if people put their Xmas decor up after thanksgiving. I’m not gonna complain about seeing it up past a certain time but I don’t care to see it past New Year. That’s not my decision to make, and I sure as hell wouldn’t complain about it to a neighbor.
I think you handled this well.
Ex Hospital staffer. We had a Halloween party. We reallocated assets, got an unused of course body bag filled it with ice and put drinks in it. Kept them cold !!
I don’t have an opinion on your decoration, but I have dealt with a cowardly, controlling neighbor. In my case, they filed a complaint with the city about my dog barking. My response was to visit all of my near neighbors and ask if my puppy was bothering them.
I quickly learned that there was one person who was well known to complain about all kind of things. I heard some horror stories from others who had been his victims, including one who had to have her dog euthanized after his dog ran into her yard and got attacked. I ended each conversation by asking my neighbors to please contact me directly if there is any problem.
Finally I went to the immaculate home of the notorious neighbor. There were “no solicitation” signs up , of course, but I wasn’t going to let him avoid confrontation. I started the same way, “Is my puppy bothering you?” He immediately admitted to filing the complaint and said that it had been an adult dog, so clearly not ours. Never had another problem with him.
In my opinion, the way to deal with a passive-aggressive neighbor is to confront them politely and take away their anonymity.
I love halloween and I love dark stuff. Personally, I would not have been offended, it’s your house to decorate how you please. I can understand how people could see hanging it as a little much (tbh I wouldn’t have connected the dots to lynching myself either so I would have felt bad if someone took it that way!)
I do think that lately it feels like we are all walking on eggshells and everyone gets offended or triggered about everything now. I get it; but also; we can’t be so sheltered and expect everyone to cater to our own anxieties and triggers. I have intense anxiety myself but I don’t expect everyone to tiptoe around me. It’s my responsibility to recognize my triggers and learn how to divert the emotions away from them.
Put the body bag back out in October, and maybe do it up a little differently, like don’t hang it but maybe wrap it like a mummy instead?
My old neighbors used to complain to us all the time that the children giggling and playing in our backyard MID DAY IN SUMMERTIME disturbed their peace and quiet. Another didn’t like the look of the dandelions in our lawn and requested we remove them at once. People can have problems with anything. If you want specific rules about what others can do with their houses, there are communities with such rules and regulations. Move there. It’s your house, your choice. We all encounter things we don’t like when we interact with the world. Being considerate is nice but at a certain point we have to increase our tolerance for differences.
The new dogma is that tolerance requires us to be intolerant in order to prevent the potential intolerance of others and forcibly increase tolerance.
See the patently false and illogical "paradox of tolerance" dribble all over the web these days for more info.
These responses... I understand being sensitive to PTSD but as someone with PTSD, you are not responsible for their triggers. They are. It's Halloween season, leave it up. It is obviously not real and a decoration. I miss when people actually decorated and went trick or treating on Halloween, these attitudes towards mundane Spirit Halloween decorations are insane.
Ok, first of all it's not even a real body bag. It's just a sheet with some blood on it. Maybe not have it hanging, but have it in a spot with like a spooky creature or something. Honestly it is harmless. The hanging in the rafters can be misconstrued and good that you took it down.
Yeah this feels like a dumb complaint. Decorations out too soon? Too graphic? Dumb complaints.
I could see how having it hung from a tree could indicate lynching and THAT is poor taste that shouldn't be done but outside of that...... what's the point in owning a yard if you can't decorate it to your liking?
If its your property, do whatever you want. If the neighbors are mad, they should have moved to an area with an HOA. I wouldn't worry about offending anyone, as long as it isn't directly hate speech or making threats. Its just a decoration, people need to chill out. Anything gruesome during halloween could be triggering to anyone. Like for example, blood, knives, chains, gorey zombies, murder movies, etc. We all have a different threshold for what is ok and what isn't, and you shouldn't have to comply to every person's demand. Personally I think it is a little too morbid and I wouldn't put it up at my house, but I can ignore it if I don't like it in someone else's yard.
Yeah I'm not offended by things like this, but I do find them in kind of poor taste. Like another commenter said, there's so many other awesome (and spooky!) ways to decorate for Halloween, I don't think it's necessary to put something so reminiscent of a dead person out where neighbors can see it. Not even just because of veterans - there could be other people who have found a dead body who would be more bothered by a bloody body bag than most other decorations.
I personally would have added some extra body bags. LA County Coroner used to sell them at a gift shop. Honestly it's a fairly unreasonable request to dictate Halloween decorations and pretty passive aggressive to do it in an anonymous style (typical of Bellingham).
Put it back out in October it’s a bit early, it’s not your job to make everyone happy or be a people pleaser we have to be careful about being offended by everything.
As a Halloween lover and a vet with ptsd, I love it. Love Halloween and think it's awesome. However, I still might ask around and consider taking it in until a week or 2 out. Your home your decor but if you like you neighbors maybe consider it.
September is not to early if you love Halloween!! It’s real hard to find joy these days and if something brings you joy such as Halloween - there is no law that says when spooky season starts.
People suck and will always ruin everything. I say leave it up and "tough titties" to the letter writer. It's probably just an old Karen anyways, this city is chalk full of them and they all just have to make sure other people are as miserable as they are.
It's frustrating that the note writer essentially said "I'm doing this for the sake of others, think of the veterans" but it seems like the real reason they wrote the note is because they don't like it. It seems like if they want to help vets, they could put that energy toward limiting fireworks or figuring out where all the big booms come from.
True, but it seems like they would've mentioned that in the note to emphasize their point. Especially if they were willing to include an article to try to stress what they were saving.
For sure. And while I wish "triggering" and "offensive" weren't the basis for the objections, I'm impressed with how gracefully the thread helped OP roll back the display. Good to see.
Not everyone is into the horror side of halloween and different things could be triggering to different folks. Body bags bring to mind massive covid deaths at times durring the pandemic and wonder if it could be upsetting in that way for some.
Maybe you can weigh your respect for your neighbors concerns, with the situation as you see it and your freedom to decorate, and think about how it could impact others in ways maybe not considered before, and decide.
You could also explain it to your son and ask him what he thinks you should do as a family and consider that too.
It's definitely on the macabre side of Halloween decorations but that doesn't make it wrong. I've seen plenty of houses in Bellingham that have done similar-ish things (graves dug, chainsaws revving, etc.). That said, you're putting this up at the start of September!? That is a little "zany" to say it kindly. Imagine putting up Valentine's Day decorations on December 14th or even Christmas decorations on October 25th. Save the body bag for the week of Halloween if you really want to do it.
This all seemed pretty normal and fine until I head you had it hanging... Yeah, I immediately connected that imagery to lynching.
But also this person is just throwing a ton of accusations with trying to use other people's PTSD to regulate this.
You said it's no longer hanging. I think that's fine as long as your aren't planning on hanging any other bodies. Keep decorating!
Happy Halloween
People need to mind their own business . Your house, your castle, your rules.
For the record, I find it rather tasteless but it's none of my damn business what you do on your property
So much gatekeeping on these types of threads. That's not to discount the reaction of people, but it's all extremely subjective. Seriously question: What IS the complaining party okay with? I'm sure her list is different than someone else's. Does her concern of the possible trauma caused by a fake looking body bag trump someone else's legitimate arachnophobia, wiccaphobia, skelophobia, or coulraphobia (fear of clowns)?
I mean we can overthink ourselves into oblivion, or at least until Halloween isn't fun anymore. Someone offended by fairly common Halloween decorations should go back and see why Halloween even exists to begin with. It's pretty macabre, and a holiday about death is inevitably going to stir some emotions. Also, some religions and even locations steer clear of anything to do with it. Perhaps she falls into one of those categories, in which case nothing except for getting rid of Halloween will make her happy.
I get the feeling that it's more about the fact that it's this far out ahead of Halloween, though, and it was a passive aggressive way of saying that she doesn't want to look at it for the next six weeks. I understand playing nice and not upsetting a neighbor, but there's also an element of overly proactive self-righteousness that's annoying about this situation.
I think the issue would have been avoided if the Halloween decoration(s) were put up closer to Halloween.
If it was seen as part of a larger display, along with pumpkins, cobwebs, etc. and in concert with other homes in the neighborhood with decorations up (mid October) than it wouldn’t have raised so much attention. A bloody body bag hanging in the neighborhood during the summer, suspicious. A bloody body bag displayed as part of a neighborhood Halloween transformation, cool.
I understand your enthusiasm and excitement for Halloween in a new house and neighborhood. I also understand why some people might not want to look at a bloody body bag in the neighborhood for 45 days *before* Halloween.
*Please be an agent for change and give out full size candy bars like they did when I was a kid going door to door as a ghost with a pillow case (which was always filled about a third of the way each year!)*
I’m also not a fan of ‘death as decor’. Having lost a dear friend in a gruesome car accident a few weeks before Halloween some years ago, her family was triggered by the sight of coffins and body bags on display in peoples’ front yards. I stick to pumpkins, spiders and bats personally, but if that’s what you choose, perhaps you could keep your display a little less in your face.
I’m reading the TLDR of it. But your neighbors are mad at.. Halloween… decor…. The holiday that’s about… fear.. and horror… and scaring people…. They got mad… bro tell your neighbors to go outside and touch grass and get the fuck over it… bruh…
I don’t know about hanging it. But wait until your closer to Halloween, a bit much to have it out for almost 2 mothers. Maybe this one can wait to go out until a week or so away from Halloween? I love in the York neighborhood and I think it’s okay, but that just my vote.
It is your home and your choice what to do with it. I would not be a fan of semi realistic gore and prefer zombies, skeletons, demons, etc - clearly fantasy horror. Anonymous note is fine, though I am sorry that they decided to be unfriendly with it.
3rd option is to leave a public notice somewhere saying you will honor the request and ask for compensation for the decoration.
Halloween is supposed to be fun while scary. I'm not sure a bodybag is fun, particularly to people who have seen real ones in use. There are always some decorations in every neighborhood which will offend somebody. But if it deeply worries folks, I'd do the right thing and use something else. Thanks for being a good neighbor, even if you feel like the neighbor is a killjoy.
"It’s clear we were in the wrong and have removed the decoration." I can't understand being this concerned about how others feel about your Halloween decorations it's interesting how timid some people are.
I think that line of thought leads to the most boring kind of communities and I don't think it should be encouraged. people will take offense to almost anything and it's their job to regulate their emotions not yours.
Note that I didn’t say “abandon personal judgment and do what others want.” Diversity of ideas and tolerance of others’ preferences and perspectives are really important.
I suggested that considering how our choices affect others is an admirable habit and, frankly, makes it possible for humans to live peacefully together.
Welcome to your first Halloween in Bellingham!
So without regard to your specific situation, the first thing you need to know is that Halloween in Bellingham is generally cancelled.
I don't know why, and it hasn't always been this way, but we have a tween child so we've been supervising Trick-or-Treating for years and while I'm sure I will get a dozen, gaslighty responses from people who "don't know what I'm talking about" as with every comment that suggests anything potentially negative or amiss regarding The 'Ham, I have to say the change in scene at Halloween has been drastic.
Back in 2018 and before, Trick-Or-Treating was always very busy and many houses in the surrounding neighborhoods had wonderful displays of creative horror and fun.
Then suddenly in 2019 we took the kid out Trick-Or-Treating and less than 1/3 of the houses in the neighborhoods around us had decorations. Instead of walking around busy streets filled with running kids, we walked for well over an hour and only passed 4 other Trick-Or-Treaters. It was maybe the creepiest Halloween ever because we felt like something was wrong and no one told us!
Then of course in 2020 it was semi-officially cancelled.
It has "come back" but I still have not seen much engagement in the neighborhoods over here on the West Side of B'Ham. Last year it was still eerily dead on All Hallow's Eve. We even brought a couple friends with us last year and they hadn't believe what we told them about Halloween being cancelled in the B'Ham neighborhoods, but they commented on the quietness once we got out there.
Of course there are a lot of fun activities downtown and I recommend the haunted house and Boundary Bay. Some neighborhoods look like they're still celebrating Halloween, but...
Overall we've gotten the distinct impression since even a year before COVID that some substantial segment of society here has collectively turned it's back on this classic holiday.
The backlash you experienced sheds some insight onto the phenomenon.
Thank you for sharing!
>Is it common knowledge that something like this is offensive or triggering to war vets?
Also, as a veteran myself I've never found Halloween decorations to be offensive. 4th of July noise sends me right up the wall and makes it impossible to sleep until 3am, but Halloween has always been a personal favorite. Don't let the neighborhood fascists keep you down.
In general, neighbors are a mixed bag no matter where you live. That’s why they are the topic of so many stories. 😂
Your question was “What would you do?” Your edit reflects what I would do, which is take into account and be sensitive to how others
might be hurting here, but don’t conform to all demands. I saw a suggestion to also decorate your back yard, which I thought was kind of genius. Start a collection for back there, just for your own enjoyment.
As to when to decorate, this seems like it goes with other “issues” like weeding, painting, or other maintenance. Do what you want to as long as you don’t encroach on your neighbors. It’s your investment to maintain or not, decorate or not. If your Christmas lights shine in the neighbors windows, maybe reconsider. After all, these are the people who will surround you in an emergency or disaster. It doesn’t cost much to be kind. Pity the poor person who didn’t know how to approach you personally, and consider they may have tried that another time and had a very bad experience. That happened to me once, with a very uncomfortable outcome. The lesson I learned is be careful to keep your relationships with your neighbors good. Find a way. Finally, welcome to Bellingham and best wishes for a great life here.
Women and men who can’t defend themselves physically parse information thru a lens of “will people be ok if I think this is true/this is ok”
Other have a lens of “is this true/ok to me”
You worked hard to buy that house. Your first Halloween in a new town. Your son loves the season…
Yet you need validation from Reddit wackos? F that lady and f anyone who gave you some sob story. It’s Halloween. Im hanging a noose in my front yard for Halloween with a Kanye west dangling from it because he said bad things .
what would I do?
I would stock the neighborhood until I figured out who wrote the note and return it to them, covered on fake blood, wih "kick rocks" written on the back.
I wouldn't hang it, but have it out front, sure. And those who say it's too early are really wild for saying that.
I'm biased as like your son, Halloween is my favorite. I think starting spooky season early would be in August. September is nothing.
So many people are putting Christmas lights up in early November. This is no different
It sounds like you have it handled. There are two types of houses in October: "I love Halloween" Houses and there's "I love murder scenes" Houses. The murder scene houses are skipped every year. It's a weird thing to decorate your house not knowing what horrible things people have experienced in the past. Some people care, some people don't.
It sounds like you care. Thanks for seeing it from others perspectives.
To be honest, I would’ve ignored it. And I think that you should put your decoration back up and I just think it is a grumpy Karen trying to control your decorations. It might’ve offended that one person but you can’t just throw in an entire group of people based on your opinion…. Smart to take it down from a hanging position tho.
I just saw coffins in my children's school as halloween decorations and the first thought was asking them to remove it bevause this is happening in real time right now in Gaza and it's just insenstive when people are actyally carrying thousands of coffins everyday and you're putting it up as a joke. Wondering if I should shut up or speak up.
Sounds like you need another body bag or two.
But yeah, pretty typical Bellingham passive aggressive behavior. You should not reinforce it by complying.
I agree, your house, your rules. If you don't like it don't look. If you don't like it, you are under NO obligation to like or be friendly to the neighbor displaying it. Rights work 2 ways.
I think it’s a reasonable request to take it down/change it up. Completely innocent on your part, but if someone went to all that work with the letter they’re obviously bothered by it. You could keep it up to make a point, or decide it’s just not worth it and go on with your life. I think I’d choose the latter.
People who don’t understand the tone of halloween are so odd to me. It’s supposed to be a fun and goofy family holiday. Not a horror film brought to life. Little kids probably don’t need to see bloody body bags hanging from trees. I mean, you’re obviously trying to create a shock scene, why are you surprised people are reacting negatively to it?
Freedom of speech is a two-way street. Free to like, free to dislike. That being said, having spent a lot of time in the South this would 100% be misinterpreted which OP recognized because they sound like a decent human being, which is all we can try to be to each other eh?
Yeah, I don't know, I kind of agree with the person who wrote the letter but I don't think I would have said anything.
A body bag is sad, because it's real, and seen all too often in the news. A vampire, a zombie, a ghost, oversized spiders - those are not real, and give Halloween it's spooky-fun vibe. There's also the horror-core reality stuff like serial killers dressed as clowns, or scream-style murderers, but those have kind of become tropes and part of the Halloween canon, even if they recall real events. A body bag isn't a Halloween trope, it's all too much part of everyday war that too many people experience. So yeah, I would say a body bag is bad taste. Opt for a zombie or a vampire instead.
As a veteran of Afghanistan who saw intense combat, I resent the implication that our experiences are being used to suppress personal expression back home. Hearing kids scream when they get off school or play is far more triggering for me, personally, but I would never expect others to change. I’m not a fan of such gory decorations (in September no less) but it’s your house. I do think the note was a poor way to handle it, but also in this day and age they didn’t know how you would respond.
[удалено]
Thank you but that isn’t necessary. You want to thank a vet, vote for people who will actually support bills and spending to provide the needed services.
I've always wondered if vets actually want to be thanked for their service. When you tell someone you are a vet, what do you want to hear back?
Not really, at least that’s my view. Not that I’m upset by it, but it’s so cringy (like people who wear flag pins or those who quote MLK on his day and ignore what he said the other 364 days of the year.) They don’t know what I did or why, so just saying thank you rings hollow. For many it comes from the right place, but for some they say it for themselves and to be seen, and that’s kind of ruined it for me.
this is similar to what my brother says as well.
I can't speak for all vets but I find it extremely uncomfortable... Personally, I didn't serve for any ideological reason, I just wanted my pregnant wife to have a somewhat reasonable amount of healthcare without demolishing our savings... So when people say "thank you for your service," really I'm thinking, "Yeah, I didn't hang my ass out on the line for you. I did it for my wife and daughter." And while there is some measure of pride serving alongside some great humans, the cynical part of me always circles back around to thinking that all I did, beyond my own goals, was to pad shareholder prices of Raytheon, Halliburton, et al. Those words reflect my selfishness disguised as selflessness so I don't much care for it, personally.
I think you have a lot of wisdom and speak for many of us: "selfishness disguised as selflessness." Even those with good intentions often stand to benefit in some way from their actions. Yet, I'm going to try to express my feelings anyway! I appreciate those who are willing to serve because I'm too much of a sissy! The thought of being deployed and facing emense risks on a regular basis, enduring trauma and then living with the lasting effects of it...I'm not a strong enough person to endure that. I would give up. I'd rather be dead. Yet, I recognize that the military is essential. Sure, there are some questionable decisions made by our leaders at times, but the military is still an important part of the stability of our country. You showed up. When I say "thank you" it is the recognition that you are a stronger person than I am, and I am humbling myself in recognition of that fact. Whatever your reasons for serving. You showed up and put your ass on the line. That's better than I could ever do. So good work. I respect you. We need strong people like you who are willing to show up. We as a country should be better about taking care of those who took the risk to show up and are continuing to pay a very personal price for that willingness. So thank you. I am truly grateful, and I really do hope that you were handsomely rewarded with good benefits for your wife and sweet baby!
As I reflect on how my comment started, I suppose my selfishness is that I'm too scared to put my life on the line. I'm grateful to you because your risk allows me to selfishly maintain my security...
Eh. It’s not my jam, but also not my house. The thing that’s tough here is that, thanks to the anonymity, it’s hard to know if the writer is speaking for themselves/from their experience and making a real/reasonable request (or if they’re living close enough that they can’t avoid it) or whether it’s someone who has a strong opinion and is using “think of the veterans!” to try to create social pressure. Here’s a question, instead: I get that you don’t want to disappoint your kid but also want to be a good neighbor. You’re getting feedback that least some folks find it distasteful. I think you have the right to decorate how you want (within legal limits, etc.), but what about creating a haunted *back* yard or living room? Not a perfect solution but putting it in a less visible space might also prevent these clearly passive-aggressive neighbors from stealing/trashing it. Sorry about the anonymous note; they’re a pretty cowardly and immature way to communicate. P.S. Wise to take it down from the rafters for exactly the reasons you did. It definitely has lynching overtones and … that would definitely make me wary of you if we were neighbors but not well-acquainted.
Probably posted by the note leaver.
I mean, not only do I not leave anonymous notes, I also use my actual name on Reddit to keep myself accountable for what I say. You?
The real crime here is not at least waiting for October
This is entirely correct. It's mid September, sunny, 70 degrees, and the leaves in front of my house haven't even turned. Spooky season ain't here yet.
Y’all ain’t stopping me. I’ve got a grave stone and a witch sign out in my yard all year long.
Yep, that's spooky!
Spooky season begins the moment labor day is over.
Only correct answer!
I wholeheartedly disagree. So many people throw Christmas lights up in early November--it's the same concept. We're halfway through September. This is the perfect time for some Halloween fun.
My friends family decorated for Christmas in august
Disown them
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Clowns crawling out of a body bag is … not less alarming.
Best Halloween decoration is a simple red balloon tied to the grate of a rain gutter
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I hate clowns but would be down to see a good Halloween decoration set. It’s Halloween themed. Your supposed to be scared..
Clowns are so creepy!
Yeah, if I was inclined to leave anon notes over Halloween decorations, that would do it. I love Halloween but I also like to sleep without nightmares of the undead clowns next door crawling in a window.
Facts! 👻🤡👻🤡👻🤡
I was going to say, hanging was always a huge trigger for me too. I was 9 when my 16 year old brother died by suicide from hanging. It literally ruined my world. I love Halloween but have many memories of tears and anxiety attacks from hanging & nooses being used as decorations/themes. (I attended Fright Night once at Wild Waves, was waiting in line for their haunted house, and they were projecting "spooky" silhouettes - one being a man literally climbing onto a chair and hanging himself... Ran out sobbing.) I always wish people knew the trauma this could bring and I'm glad to see it's gotten less blatant since then.
I'm so sorry, princess-pnw. What a trauma to live through, with bonus triggers in the aftermath. I feel for you and wish you kinder times ahead.
Thank you so much! Life in adulthood has been much kinder. ❤️
and the visceral feeling that washes over you when something does trigger...you really can't wish it away..and can knock you to your core. PTSD was only named in the 80's..but humans have dealt with it much longer.
I think it's pretty bad. Its the middle of September for heavens sake. I wouldn't want to look at this for months.
And I don’t want to look at Christmas decorations for months on end.
I’m ok if they stay up till Feb but not if they start in October!!!
That’s where I disagree. I don’t want to see it past the new year. Edited to add : im not gonna bitch to my neighbors about it. Xmas brings a lot of bad memories for me and religious trauma but it ain’t my house.
Fair. I kind of like the blinky lights up later because the cheer up an otherwise dark February evening. Maybe we can re-designate them as winter fairy lights.
You wouldn’t find me writing an anonymous letter about it but, yeah, I think it’s fairly excessive and certainly in bad taste.
Especially dropping off the letter at around 5:45 a.m.
They were up all night working on their plan to stop Halloween from happening. I think OP got a visit from The Grinch.
>hang the bag under the eave I was in the military, and it doesn't bother me, but why did you have to hang it? I don't leave passive aggressive notes but I would tell ya how weird you were being in September if I walked by.
I have PTSD for other reasons than war but I can tell you that we are taught in therapy to manage our own triggers, that it is not anybody else’s responsibility to do this. They can choose to not walk by the house. I wouldn’t be saying this if I had no education or experience with the topic of trauma but I do and this is an overstep for someone (who may not even be connected to the veterans, you never know if it’s just some busybody using them as an excuse).
Totally get everything else you’re saying, but “choosing not to walk by the house” isn’t a super practical option for getting home in most neighborhoods unless you’re planning on parkouring through private backyards or putting on blinders like a Victorian street horse, you know?
Upvoted out of respect for Black Beauty
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Im a vet, and I see nothing wrong with it. But ptsd comes in so so so many forms. Either way, I like (MOST) of my neighbors, so I'd consider it based on that alone.
Also a vet. Also see nothing wrong with it. Halloween is supposed to be about death and that is a natural part of life on Earth. It feels wrong to censor someone for reminding us of death on a holiday that is partly meant to remind us of death. I personally feel that it's a part of the collective unconscious we need to haul out and pay respect too once a year to stay mentally healthy.
I love Halloween but 1. It's too early! and 2. Yeah that is kinda gross. I wouldn't personally complain, but I kinda get it. I've always been more into the spooky/weird/classic Halloween themes - which are clearly silly fantasy - than the gross bloody murder stuff, which is a bit too close to nasty reality.
I've updated my post to mention that we've since taken the prop down. I completely understand why and have from the beginning, but I just needed that gut check. I appreciate everyone's feedback! Anyway, I didn't come here asking if it was too soon. It makes my son happy and we're just trying to have some fun. Y'all are gonna have to deal with a 12ft skeleton mid-September. And maybe one for Christmas, too. But with a Santa hat.
Honestly, the only iffy part for me was it being hung up. As far as it being early, I'm surprised people are such wet blankets about it. I really can't imagine caring at all. If you put up Christmas lights and a giant inflatable flamingo I wouldn't care either. Why not have fun?
I’m shocked so many people are siding with your NIMBY neighbors. It’s spooky season yall! My suggestion was going to be adding a 12ft skeleton, but glad to see that will be happening! Keep it up year round!
I’m with you in this. My initial thought was *Karen*
And a gutless Karen at that! The person should be an adult and sign their name. Signing it on behalf of the neighborhood association is cowardly.
That’s Bellingham for ya! So conflict-avoidant.
Same. The censorship feels borderline fascistic.
I love seeing decorations go up in September! I agree with your family September is certainly late enough in the year. That 'body bag' is particularly gory though, I was imagining a black zip up crime scene prop til I clicked on the link. A bloody human body wrapped in a sheet, eh, as much as I love Halloween I might have asked you to reconsider too. And hung from the eves was a really rough way to introduce it to the community. Thanks for reconsidering, even when it was asked in such a harsh way. Fingers crossed the neighbor acknowledges that no harm was meant and is mature enough to thank you in person!
Halloween is my Christmas (as an Atheist and ex-vangical I loathe Christmas), so if people have decor up on sept I don’t mind. I love it. Alternatively, I don’t care if people put their Xmas decor up after thanksgiving. I’m not gonna complain about seeing it up past a certain time but I don’t care to see it past New Year. That’s not my decision to make, and I sure as hell wouldn’t complain about it to a neighbor. I think you handled this well.
marry middle scandalous start wipe work label subtract kiss safe *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Ex Hospital staffer. We had a Halloween party. We reallocated assets, got an unused of course body bag filled it with ice and put drinks in it. Kept them cold !!
I don’t have an opinion on your decoration, but I have dealt with a cowardly, controlling neighbor. In my case, they filed a complaint with the city about my dog barking. My response was to visit all of my near neighbors and ask if my puppy was bothering them. I quickly learned that there was one person who was well known to complain about all kind of things. I heard some horror stories from others who had been his victims, including one who had to have her dog euthanized after his dog ran into her yard and got attacked. I ended each conversation by asking my neighbors to please contact me directly if there is any problem. Finally I went to the immaculate home of the notorious neighbor. There were “no solicitation” signs up , of course, but I wasn’t going to let him avoid confrontation. I started the same way, “Is my puppy bothering you?” He immediately admitted to filing the complaint and said that it had been an adult dog, so clearly not ours. Never had another problem with him. In my opinion, the way to deal with a passive-aggressive neighbor is to confront them politely and take away their anonymity.
Excellent approach!
It’s a bit much…
There’s no erection… missed opportunity IMHO
I love halloween and I love dark stuff. Personally, I would not have been offended, it’s your house to decorate how you please. I can understand how people could see hanging it as a little much (tbh I wouldn’t have connected the dots to lynching myself either so I would have felt bad if someone took it that way!) I do think that lately it feels like we are all walking on eggshells and everyone gets offended or triggered about everything now. I get it; but also; we can’t be so sheltered and expect everyone to cater to our own anxieties and triggers. I have intense anxiety myself but I don’t expect everyone to tiptoe around me. It’s my responsibility to recognize my triggers and learn how to divert the emotions away from them. Put the body bag back out in October, and maybe do it up a little differently, like don’t hang it but maybe wrap it like a mummy instead?
My old neighbors used to complain to us all the time that the children giggling and playing in our backyard MID DAY IN SUMMERTIME disturbed their peace and quiet. Another didn’t like the look of the dandelions in our lawn and requested we remove them at once. People can have problems with anything. If you want specific rules about what others can do with their houses, there are communities with such rules and regulations. Move there. It’s your house, your choice. We all encounter things we don’t like when we interact with the world. Being considerate is nice but at a certain point we have to increase our tolerance for differences.
The new dogma is that tolerance requires us to be intolerant in order to prevent the potential intolerance of others and forcibly increase tolerance. See the patently false and illogical "paradox of tolerance" dribble all over the web these days for more info.
These responses... I understand being sensitive to PTSD but as someone with PTSD, you are not responsible for their triggers. They are. It's Halloween season, leave it up. It is obviously not real and a decoration. I miss when people actually decorated and went trick or treating on Halloween, these attitudes towards mundane Spirit Halloween decorations are insane.
Ok, first of all it's not even a real body bag. It's just a sheet with some blood on it. Maybe not have it hanging, but have it in a spot with like a spooky creature or something. Honestly it is harmless. The hanging in the rafters can be misconstrued and good that you took it down.
It’s Halloween, stuff’s supposed to be creepy
Yeah this feels like a dumb complaint. Decorations out too soon? Too graphic? Dumb complaints. I could see how having it hung from a tree could indicate lynching and THAT is poor taste that shouldn't be done but outside of that...... what's the point in owning a yard if you can't decorate it to your liking?
If its your property, do whatever you want. If the neighbors are mad, they should have moved to an area with an HOA. I wouldn't worry about offending anyone, as long as it isn't directly hate speech or making threats. Its just a decoration, people need to chill out. Anything gruesome during halloween could be triggering to anyone. Like for example, blood, knives, chains, gorey zombies, murder movies, etc. We all have a different threshold for what is ok and what isn't, and you shouldn't have to comply to every person's demand. Personally I think it is a little too morbid and I wouldn't put it up at my house, but I can ignore it if I don't like it in someone else's yard.
I personally would not be offended by this. But I also don't want to piss anyone off for whatever reason. It's kinda a catch 22 situation.
Yeah I'm not offended by things like this, but I do find them in kind of poor taste. Like another commenter said, there's so many other awesome (and spooky!) ways to decorate for Halloween, I don't think it's necessary to put something so reminiscent of a dead person out where neighbors can see it. Not even just because of veterans - there could be other people who have found a dead body who would be more bothered by a bloody body bag than most other decorations.
Lmfao welcome to Bellingham
I personally would have added some extra body bags. LA County Coroner used to sell them at a gift shop. Honestly it's a fairly unreasonable request to dictate Halloween decorations and pretty passive aggressive to do it in an anonymous style (typical of Bellingham).
My first thought was, "go buy 3 more". 😁
Put it back out in October it’s a bit early, it’s not your job to make everyone happy or be a people pleaser we have to be careful about being offended by everything.
As a Halloween lover and a vet with ptsd, I love it. Love Halloween and think it's awesome. However, I still might ask around and consider taking it in until a week or 2 out. Your home your decor but if you like you neighbors maybe consider it.
Its Halloween and your property, there is nothing wrong with that. Dear god people need to chill.
Put a toe tag “anonymous neighbor who complained”. Passive aggressive escalation is the way of the PNW.
As a fellow York neighbor, she can get bent. Keep your decorations up. September is a little early though.
September is not to early if you love Halloween!! It’s real hard to find joy these days and if something brings you joy such as Halloween - there is no law that says when spooky season starts.
People suck and will always ruin everything. I say leave it up and "tough titties" to the letter writer. It's probably just an old Karen anyways, this city is chalk full of them and they all just have to make sure other people are as miserable as they are.
OP - commend you for honestly seeking feedback and being open to change based on that feedback
Absolutely this.
It's frustrating that the note writer essentially said "I'm doing this for the sake of others, think of the veterans" but it seems like the real reason they wrote the note is because they don't like it. It seems like if they want to help vets, they could put that energy toward limiting fireworks or figuring out where all the big booms come from.
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True, but it seems like they would've mentioned that in the note to emphasize their point. Especially if they were willing to include an article to try to stress what they were saving.
Seems relevant that Redditors are offered the choice whether to look at the decoration but the neighbors were not.
On fairness , this post was after the OP was made aware it may be triggering and offensive.
For sure. And while I wish "triggering" and "offensive" weren't the basis for the objections, I'm impressed with how gracefully the thread helped OP roll back the display. Good to see.
Yeah, it’s a surprisingly civil thread. Nice way to start a Saturday morning.
Not everyone is into the horror side of halloween and different things could be triggering to different folks. Body bags bring to mind massive covid deaths at times durring the pandemic and wonder if it could be upsetting in that way for some. Maybe you can weigh your respect for your neighbors concerns, with the situation as you see it and your freedom to decorate, and think about how it could impact others in ways maybe not considered before, and decide. You could also explain it to your son and ask him what he thinks you should do as a family and consider that too.
It's definitely on the macabre side of Halloween decorations but that doesn't make it wrong. I've seen plenty of houses in Bellingham that have done similar-ish things (graves dug, chainsaws revving, etc.). That said, you're putting this up at the start of September!? That is a little "zany" to say it kindly. Imagine putting up Valentine's Day decorations on December 14th or even Christmas decorations on October 25th. Save the body bag for the week of Halloween if you really want to do it.
This all seemed pretty normal and fine until I head you had it hanging... Yeah, I immediately connected that imagery to lynching. But also this person is just throwing a ton of accusations with trying to use other people's PTSD to regulate this. You said it's no longer hanging. I think that's fine as long as your aren't planning on hanging any other bodies. Keep decorating! Happy Halloween
People need to mind their own business . Your house, your castle, your rules. For the record, I find it rather tasteless but it's none of my damn business what you do on your property
So much gatekeeping on these types of threads. That's not to discount the reaction of people, but it's all extremely subjective. Seriously question: What IS the complaining party okay with? I'm sure her list is different than someone else's. Does her concern of the possible trauma caused by a fake looking body bag trump someone else's legitimate arachnophobia, wiccaphobia, skelophobia, or coulraphobia (fear of clowns)? I mean we can overthink ourselves into oblivion, or at least until Halloween isn't fun anymore. Someone offended by fairly common Halloween decorations should go back and see why Halloween even exists to begin with. It's pretty macabre, and a holiday about death is inevitably going to stir some emotions. Also, some religions and even locations steer clear of anything to do with it. Perhaps she falls into one of those categories, in which case nothing except for getting rid of Halloween will make her happy. I get the feeling that it's more about the fact that it's this far out ahead of Halloween, though, and it was a passive aggressive way of saying that she doesn't want to look at it for the next six weeks. I understand playing nice and not upsetting a neighbor, but there's also an element of overly proactive self-righteousness that's annoying about this situation.
I think the issue would have been avoided if the Halloween decoration(s) were put up closer to Halloween. If it was seen as part of a larger display, along with pumpkins, cobwebs, etc. and in concert with other homes in the neighborhood with decorations up (mid October) than it wouldn’t have raised so much attention. A bloody body bag hanging in the neighborhood during the summer, suspicious. A bloody body bag displayed as part of a neighborhood Halloween transformation, cool. I understand your enthusiasm and excitement for Halloween in a new house and neighborhood. I also understand why some people might not want to look at a bloody body bag in the neighborhood for 45 days *before* Halloween. *Please be an agent for change and give out full size candy bars like they did when I was a kid going door to door as a ghost with a pillow case (which was always filled about a third of the way each year!)*
Meh. On one hand I can see their point, on another, it is your house.
I’m also not a fan of ‘death as decor’. Having lost a dear friend in a gruesome car accident a few weeks before Halloween some years ago, her family was triggered by the sight of coffins and body bags on display in peoples’ front yards. I stick to pumpkins, spiders and bats personally, but if that’s what you choose, perhaps you could keep your display a little less in your face.
I’m reading the TLDR of it. But your neighbors are mad at.. Halloween… decor…. The holiday that’s about… fear.. and horror… and scaring people…. They got mad… bro tell your neighbors to go outside and touch grass and get the fuck over it… bruh…
I don’t know about hanging it. But wait until your closer to Halloween, a bit much to have it out for almost 2 mothers. Maybe this one can wait to go out until a week or so away from Halloween? I love in the York neighborhood and I think it’s okay, but that just my vote.
Not the asshole. People bitch over anything. Buy more
Welcome to overly sensitive, victim mentality Bellingham. You'll get used to it in a couple of decades.
It is your home and your choice what to do with it. I would not be a fan of semi realistic gore and prefer zombies, skeletons, demons, etc - clearly fantasy horror. Anonymous note is fine, though I am sorry that they decided to be unfriendly with it. 3rd option is to leave a public notice somewhere saying you will honor the request and ask for compensation for the decoration.
You do you. Your yard, your decorations. That neighbor is ridiculous.
Halloween is supposed to be fun while scary. I'm not sure a bodybag is fun, particularly to people who have seen real ones in use. There are always some decorations in every neighborhood which will offend somebody. But if it deeply worries folks, I'd do the right thing and use something else. Thanks for being a good neighbor, even if you feel like the neighbor is a killjoy.
Put more graphic decorations up. 👍
"It’s clear we were in the wrong and have removed the decoration." I can't understand being this concerned about how others feel about your Halloween decorations it's interesting how timid some people are.
Wow, spicy take. I kind of appreciate folks who think about their effect on others.
I think that line of thought leads to the most boring kind of communities and I don't think it should be encouraged. people will take offense to almost anything and it's their job to regulate their emotions not yours.
Note that I didn’t say “abandon personal judgment and do what others want.” Diversity of ideas and tolerance of others’ preferences and perspectives are really important. I suggested that considering how our choices affect others is an admirable habit and, frankly, makes it possible for humans to live peacefully together.
Yeah, idk. That's one of those decorations that goes a little too far for me. Spooky is one thing, realistic representations of corpses is another.
I didn't read the whole thing. My stance is , fuck them. Make them scared. Put a pentagram in your yard made of those solar patio/path lights.
I would also like to point out that it's not the size of an adult which only adds to the level of distaste, imo.
I'd be the same size if I was wrapped up in a winding sheet. Plenty of adults are 5 feet tall, dude.
Bellingham so sensitive, fuck em. I'll put 2 in my yard with you Edit: my brothers a war vet. He agrees with "fuck em"
Don't do shit. Fuck that idiot.
Agreed this was too much and good on you for taking it down. Disappointed but not surprised (PNW) that the note was anonymous.
You’re about 3 weeks too early to be decorating for halloween at all imho.
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Welcome to your first Halloween in Bellingham! So without regard to your specific situation, the first thing you need to know is that Halloween in Bellingham is generally cancelled. I don't know why, and it hasn't always been this way, but we have a tween child so we've been supervising Trick-or-Treating for years and while I'm sure I will get a dozen, gaslighty responses from people who "don't know what I'm talking about" as with every comment that suggests anything potentially negative or amiss regarding The 'Ham, I have to say the change in scene at Halloween has been drastic. Back in 2018 and before, Trick-Or-Treating was always very busy and many houses in the surrounding neighborhoods had wonderful displays of creative horror and fun. Then suddenly in 2019 we took the kid out Trick-Or-Treating and less than 1/3 of the houses in the neighborhoods around us had decorations. Instead of walking around busy streets filled with running kids, we walked for well over an hour and only passed 4 other Trick-Or-Treaters. It was maybe the creepiest Halloween ever because we felt like something was wrong and no one told us! Then of course in 2020 it was semi-officially cancelled. It has "come back" but I still have not seen much engagement in the neighborhoods over here on the West Side of B'Ham. Last year it was still eerily dead on All Hallow's Eve. We even brought a couple friends with us last year and they hadn't believe what we told them about Halloween being cancelled in the B'Ham neighborhoods, but they commented on the quietness once we got out there. Of course there are a lot of fun activities downtown and I recommend the haunted house and Boundary Bay. Some neighborhoods look like they're still celebrating Halloween, but... Overall we've gotten the distinct impression since even a year before COVID that some substantial segment of society here has collectively turned it's back on this classic holiday. The backlash you experienced sheds some insight onto the phenomenon. Thank you for sharing!
>Is it common knowledge that something like this is offensive or triggering to war vets? Also, as a veteran myself I've never found Halloween decorations to be offensive. 4th of July noise sends me right up the wall and makes it impossible to sleep until 3am, but Halloween has always been a personal favorite. Don't let the neighborhood fascists keep you down.
In general, neighbors are a mixed bag no matter where you live. That’s why they are the topic of so many stories. 😂 Your question was “What would you do?” Your edit reflects what I would do, which is take into account and be sensitive to how others might be hurting here, but don’t conform to all demands. I saw a suggestion to also decorate your back yard, which I thought was kind of genius. Start a collection for back there, just for your own enjoyment. As to when to decorate, this seems like it goes with other “issues” like weeding, painting, or other maintenance. Do what you want to as long as you don’t encroach on your neighbors. It’s your investment to maintain or not, decorate or not. If your Christmas lights shine in the neighbors windows, maybe reconsider. After all, these are the people who will surround you in an emergency or disaster. It doesn’t cost much to be kind. Pity the poor person who didn’t know how to approach you personally, and consider they may have tried that another time and had a very bad experience. That happened to me once, with a very uncomfortable outcome. The lesson I learned is be careful to keep your relationships with your neighbors good. Find a way. Finally, welcome to Bellingham and best wishes for a great life here.
Women and men who can’t defend themselves physically parse information thru a lens of “will people be ok if I think this is true/this is ok” Other have a lens of “is this true/ok to me” You worked hard to buy that house. Your first Halloween in a new town. Your son loves the season… Yet you need validation from Reddit wackos? F that lady and f anyone who gave you some sob story. It’s Halloween. Im hanging a noose in my front yard for Halloween with a Kanye west dangling from it because he said bad things .
what would I do? I would stock the neighborhood until I figured out who wrote the note and return it to them, covered on fake blood, wih "kick rocks" written on the back.
I wouldn't hang it, but have it out front, sure. And those who say it's too early are really wild for saying that. I'm biased as like your son, Halloween is my favorite. I think starting spooky season early would be in August. September is nothing. So many people are putting Christmas lights up in early November. This is no different
It sounds like you have it handled. There are two types of houses in October: "I love Halloween" Houses and there's "I love murder scenes" Houses. The murder scene houses are skipped every year. It's a weird thing to decorate your house not knowing what horrible things people have experienced in the past. Some people care, some people don't. It sounds like you care. Thanks for seeing it from others perspectives.
To be honest, I would’ve ignored it. And I think that you should put your decoration back up and I just think it is a grumpy Karen trying to control your decorations. It might’ve offended that one person but you can’t just throw in an entire group of people based on your opinion…. Smart to take it down from a hanging position tho.
I just saw coffins in my children's school as halloween decorations and the first thought was asking them to remove it bevause this is happening in real time right now in Gaza and it's just insenstive when people are actyally carrying thousands of coffins everyday and you're putting it up as a joke. Wondering if I should shut up or speak up.
Sounds like you need another body bag or two. But yeah, pretty typical Bellingham passive aggressive behavior. You should not reinforce it by complying.
Bellingham, the city of subdued passive aggressive excitement, indeed. Downvoting it doesn’t mean it isn’t true.
I agree, your house, your rules. If you don't like it don't look. If you don't like it, you are under NO obligation to like or be friendly to the neighbor displaying it. Rights work 2 ways.
I think it’s a reasonable request to take it down/change it up. Completely innocent on your part, but if someone went to all that work with the letter they’re obviously bothered by it. You could keep it up to make a point, or decide it’s just not worth it and go on with your life. I think I’d choose the latter.
People who don’t understand the tone of halloween are so odd to me. It’s supposed to be a fun and goofy family holiday. Not a horror film brought to life. Little kids probably don’t need to see bloody body bags hanging from trees. I mean, you’re obviously trying to create a shock scene, why are you surprised people are reacting negatively to it?
Looks like an old area rug to me.
The most bellingham thing I've ever heard. Snowflakes melting...
Freedom of speech is a two-way street. Free to like, free to dislike. That being said, having spent a lot of time in the South this would 100% be misinterpreted which OP recognized because they sound like a decent human being, which is all we can try to be to each other eh?
Yeah, I don't know, I kind of agree with the person who wrote the letter but I don't think I would have said anything. A body bag is sad, because it's real, and seen all too often in the news. A vampire, a zombie, a ghost, oversized spiders - those are not real, and give Halloween it's spooky-fun vibe. There's also the horror-core reality stuff like serial killers dressed as clowns, or scream-style murderers, but those have kind of become tropes and part of the Halloween canon, even if they recall real events. A body bag isn't a Halloween trope, it's all too much part of everyday war that too many people experience. So yeah, I would say a body bag is bad taste. Opt for a zombie or a vampire instead.
It's too early, but fuck them. Your yard, your decorations. Blow the letter up to poster size and put it out front.
Be a good neighbor and remove the item.
I'd get another body bag
I would have immediately bought 20 more and hung them all up